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04:04C'est pas un peu, et je n'ai pas besoin d'avoir du temps avec ça.
04:07Mais...
04:08C'est un peu plus, c'est ce que je peux faire.
04:11Oui, c'est le troisième.
04:15Oui, c'est le troisième.
04:18C'est le troisième.
04:19C'est un peu plus, non ?
04:21C'est notre troisième show.
04:23L'année dernière, c'était génial.
04:25L'année dernière, si vous demandez,
04:26c'était notre fantastique musical guest
04:29ou notre hélériste panel.
04:31Mais, according to the Internet,
04:32le highlight of the show
04:33was that we mentioned Brazil once.
04:37I don't know if you're on the Internet,
04:38but people online go fucking nuts
04:40when you mention Brazil.
04:43So, here you guys go.
04:45Eat it up.
04:47Brazil.
04:51The Great Nation.
04:53By the way, Netflix viewers who are watching this,
04:55thank you for watching us
04:57and not adolescents right now.
04:59Thank you for taking a break
05:01from the depressing show
05:02about a little boy incel
05:04to watch me,
05:06the big boy incel.
05:11Oh, abuelita.
05:12Abuelita, please.
05:13Eyes up here.
05:15Thank you.
05:17All right.
05:19Each week on the show,
05:20we have a topic,
05:21and this week is no exception.
05:23Tonight, we are talking about funeral planning.
05:27Okay?
05:28So, yeah.
05:32I understand that was what I would call a tepid response.
05:36Some people here at the show thought that this topic
05:38might be too morbid,
05:40and I get that.
05:40But listen, we're not talking about death.
05:43We're not talking about death.
05:44Death is a mystery.
05:45There are a million ways to die,
05:48and none of us knows what happens to us after we die,
05:51but we do know, generally speaking,
05:54what happens to our remains.
05:55They get tossed in roughly one of two ways.
05:59Burning them up till they're dirt,
06:01or putting them in a box.
06:03Yes, there's new types of air wand-style burials
06:06where they put you in a potato sack
06:08and you become a mushroom,
06:09but that's just another version of box.
06:12That's just paper, not plastic.
06:15I think this is an important topic,
06:17and I want to spend the hour on it
06:18because it's important to get ahead of funeral planning.
06:21I don't know if you know this,
06:22but most people right now are, like, 85 years old.
06:26It's true.
06:27So many classic rock stars are about to die.
06:31It's staggering.
06:32I know, I'm upset, too.
06:35Hey, Rolling Stone magazine,
06:37I hope you love black and white covers.
06:41Because you're about to print about three a week.
06:45I bet we'll have multiple rock icons go in one day.
06:48Sometimes I'll be like,
06:49I always felt bad that Rod Stewart died the same day
06:52as Bob Dylan.
06:53And how weird that it was a murder-suicide.
06:57I actually became obsessed with funerals through rock music.
07:01The first time I really was interested in a funeral
07:03is when I saw the video for Guns N' Roses' November Rain.
07:07Okay? Axl Rose's girlfriend, Stephanie Seymour,
07:11has a funeral in the video.
07:13And I remember going,
07:14oh, how did she die?
07:15And my babysitter at the time
07:17told me that she was murdered by Slash.
07:21That's just a fun story.
07:23I like that.
07:24I like it, too.
07:25I'll tell you this.
07:26Funeral planning is important
07:27because planning of all kinds is important,
07:29especially for me.
07:30I am a bad planner.
07:31I need to force myself to think ahead.
07:33For example, Greek Easter is less than a month away.
07:37And what have I planned so far
07:39except smashing some plates?
07:41Jack shit.
07:43Looking forward a happy Greek Easter to all of you.
07:46Thank you.
07:47It's a great time.
07:48We need to focus on the amount of funerals
07:51that are about to happen.
07:5212,000 people in America turn 65 every day.
07:57I'm not trying to be ageist.
07:59I'm not saying that's a problem
08:00because old people are a problem.
08:01It's not.
08:01We just need to be prepared for the wild amount of people
08:04that are about to be old folks.
08:06Remember when you were a kid
08:07and like on your block there was one old lady on a stoop?
08:12And the rest of the people were kids?
08:16Now there's going to be one kid on a stoop.
08:19And everybody else is an old lady.
08:22There's really about to be a lot of them.
08:24I can't stress this enough.
08:26I can tell from your faces
08:27I don't think you're that prepared for this.
08:29It's really going to be a lot.
08:31So we need some new guidelines.
08:33Like I don't want any more of this where we go
08:35oh I thought you two were sisters.
08:38Enough of that shit.
08:40We know when one of them is the mom.
08:44Stop that weird skit.
08:47I'm trying to get ahead of death a little.
08:49I had my will put together this year.
08:51And I tell you this.
08:53Most of the time I'm like the most liberal Democrat person imaginable.
08:57And like I'm always like Bill Gates should pay his taxes right.
09:00Man when I sat up and drew this thing up.
09:02I when it comes to my dead body.
09:04I'm not giving anyone a goddamn cent.
09:06I have the most elaborate tax schemes planned.
09:09I sat down with my lawyers and they were like okay.
09:12The moment you die we will get you declared a small business in Aruba.
09:15Then your children will be the sole employees.
09:18According to maritime law the IRS cannot tax monies that exchange hands over the beach.
09:25People might not know this but you can say whatever you want in a will.
09:29For real.
09:30I specified in my will that I'm leaving this show to my six month old baby girl.
09:35So if anything happens to me she will automatically become the host.
09:39And Netflix has no say in it.
09:43I'm always.
09:44Yeah.
09:47That chunky little blue eyed beauty.
09:50Sitting out there.
09:52Unable to talk but looking right down the barrel.
09:55I'm always paranoid about.
09:57Are you paranoid about people going through your stuff after you die?
10:00Yeah.
10:00Yeah.
10:05Yeah I can't imagine you'd be good with it.
10:08I'm always worried that's why I have never kept a diary.
10:12And the few times I did keep a diary.
10:14I wrote in it to look like I was a good person.
10:19For people to find later.
10:20I really did this a couple times when I was young.
10:22I'd sit down and be like today I saw a homeless man.
10:25And I was so sad that I couldn't do more for him.
10:28Like just fucking lies.
10:30And like really building myself up.
10:32And I would switch pens so it looked like different days.
10:35I didn't trust diaries at all.
10:36I still don't.
10:37I thought a diary was a thing that you leave behind.
10:40For people to read after you die.
10:43And the reason I thought that.
10:45Was because the first diary.
10:47I ever heard of in my life.
10:49Yeah.
10:52Was the diary of Anne Frank.
10:54And the reason I heard of it.
10:57Was because every teenager in the world.
11:00reads it in school.
11:02It is psychotic.
11:04Stop reading this little girl's.
11:06It's her diary.
11:08Anne Frank was murdered by the Nazis.
11:10And I guarantee you.
11:11She is more mad.
11:13That teen boys everywhere.
11:15Are reading her diary every year.
11:18She's like why are they reading it.
11:20Aren't there other books about World War Two.
11:21And people are like yeah.
11:22In fact most books are about World War Two.
11:25We just want to pry in your business.
11:29It's such bullshit.
11:30It's a bullshit move.
11:31If you have kids.
11:32In junior high.
11:34And they're assigned the diary of Anne Frank.
11:35I want you to tell them.
11:36To pick it up.
11:37Stand up on their desk.
11:38And go this.
11:39Is bullshit.
11:41Now.
11:43This comment will be misinterpreted.
11:47So it's important to add.
11:49To full context.
11:51Alright.
11:52We've got a lot to get to.
11:53We've got a lot to get to.
11:55You never know what's going to happen.
11:56On everybody's live.
11:57Because we've always tried.
11:59A lot of stuff.
12:00On this.
12:00Excuse me.
12:01Excuse me.
12:03You haven't done every hype.
12:05I'm s-
12:06What?
12:07You haven't done every height.
12:09Letterman couldn't do it.
12:11Carson couldn't do it.
12:12What do you mean by every height?
12:15You haven't had men of every height.
12:18On the show at the same time.
12:22Ma'am what are you picturing here?
12:26One man.
12:27For every inch.
12:28Between five and seven feet.
12:31So 24 men.
12:32Yeah 24 men.
12:33Standing side by side.
12:35One man representing each inch.
12:38Forming a perfectly diagonal line.
12:44That's quite an ask.
12:46I must say.
12:46I mean a lot of men don't even know their height.
12:49Well maybe they should John.
12:50Maybe men need to get measured.
12:54Yeah.
12:55I think.
12:56I think.
12:57I think.
12:58I think that lady.
13:00Gonna do our part.
13:01And help men get measured.
13:03And we'll get into that tonight.
13:05Absolutely.
13:06But let's get this show started.
13:08Everyone here.
13:09Look at this audience.
13:10You're all such wonderful people.
13:11Like the website that sent Richard into credit card debt.
13:14This audience is only fans.
13:18Speaking.
13:22Speaking of Richard.
13:24There's Richard.
13:25Hello Johnny.
13:25Thank you.
13:27Thank you.
13:31It is.
13:32It is so nice to share a stage with you for another show.
13:36I'm so excited.
13:36We have so many great people to talk to tonight.
13:38And John.
13:39I have just the thing to make sure the talking is terrific.
13:43Richard Kind's Party Starters.
13:47Conversation cards to get any party going.
13:50It's the number one party game in my house.
13:52And no conversation will hit the skids with a couple of these in your back pocket.
13:57So.
13:57You wanna do one?
13:59Sure.
14:00And thank you for that long set up for a bit we did last year.
14:04Well.
14:04However.
14:05Because of last year.
14:07They sold enough to make more.
14:09Yes.
14:09Now.
14:09Which deck do you want?
14:11Okay.
14:11We got Party Starters.
14:13The 80's.
14:15Party Starters.
14:15Naughty.
14:16Party Starters.
14:17Awkward.
14:18Um.
14:19How about Party Starters 80's?
14:21No.
14:21Come on.
14:21Pick Naughty.
14:23Pick Naughty.
14:24Come on.
14:24Okay.
14:25Alright.
14:25I picked Naughty.
14:26Okay.
14:29Are you gay?
14:32Are you bi?
14:34Are you just straight?
14:38How is that naughty?
14:40It's sexy.
14:41It's a sex question.
14:43Okay.
14:43I don't wanna answer that.
14:45Boo.
14:46Boo.
14:47Alright.
14:48Joe Five.
14:49Do another one.
14:50Okay.
14:51If they made a porn movie of one of your worst frenemies lives.
14:55What would it be called?
14:58Answer.
14:58Sluts from Hell.
15:01It gives the answer?
15:03Well it gives the top funniest answers if you can't think of one so I thought I'd take care of
15:08it.
15:10Oh.
15:10Okay.
15:10Hold up.
15:11Hold up.
15:11You'll like this one.
15:14Demonstrate your O face.
15:17No.
15:19Come on.
15:19Do it.
15:20Your orgasm face.
15:21Do it.
15:21No.
15:22I don't want to.
15:23Okay.
15:24Take off your shirt and make a kissing face.
15:28That's not even on a card.
15:32You just made that one up.
15:33Let's get off Naughty.
15:34Okay.
15:35You don't want Naughty.
15:36That's okay.
15:37We'll stop right there.
15:38Let's do hair teasers.
15:41Okay.
15:41The riddles.
15:42Like okay.
15:42Here we go.
15:43A boy's father is dead.
15:45Someone comes up to him and the boy says this is my parent.
15:50How is that possible?
15:55It's his mother.
15:59It's his mother.
16:02It's his mother.
16:03It's his mother.
16:04It's his mother.
16:04A lot of people don't think that it could be the mother.
16:06It's the mother.
16:07Yeah.
16:08Yeah.
16:08That was great Rich.
16:09Thanks John.
16:10Thank you so much.
16:12Party starters.
16:16They're available at Vaughn's and Michael's only.
16:20Back to you John.
16:21Every night we select a topic for our show and as I said tonight's topic is funeral planning.
16:26We will be taking your calls from all around the world during the broadcast.
16:32Please call in with any questions or stories.
16:34You have a book.
16:35There's the number right there.
16:35That number on your screen is what you should call if you have stories or questions about funeral planning.
16:40To help me take on this urgent conversation I would like to welcome my first two guests.
16:45Please welcome my best friends in the world Pete Davidson and Lunell.
17:00Thank you for being here.
17:13I've never said this before but welcome back to Everybody's Live.
17:17You guys were on our shows in May.
17:19It's so nice to see you both.
17:20You too.
17:21Isn't it?
17:21How you doing?
17:21You look good.
17:22I'm good.
17:23How's everything going?
17:24How's life?
17:24Everything's pretty good.
17:25How about you?
17:25I'm doing pretty good.
17:26We'll talk later.
17:27Alright.
17:29Lunell, thank you for being here.
17:31Thank you for having me.
17:32I know that you're in Vegas and you came all the way to Los Angeles just to hang out with
17:36us and I loved you for that.
17:37I did.
17:37I did.
17:38I'm just a Netflix whore.
17:46Lunell, we're live around the world but like most of the time you're live on Instagram.
17:51How much of your day do you feel you're live on Instagram?
17:55Maybe about an hour, hour and a half out of my day.
17:59Maybe in the morning doing breakfast or backstage at a show.
18:03Your Instagram lives are very like verite.
18:06And might I say he stalks me.
18:11I put up a lot of comments, yeah.
18:14In my DMs as well.
18:16For sure.
18:18Leaving me on unread.
18:19Don't think I haven't noticed.
18:22Well, you're not the only one, sweetheart.
18:26Good for you.
18:30So, there's no great way to pivot to funeral planning but...
18:34Alright.
18:35Lunell, have you ever thought about God, if, if, God forbid you should one day perish,
18:39how you would like to be interned or not?
18:43Yes, I have.
18:45I think about it every moment of every day.
18:49Alright, yes, I've thought about it.
18:51And you know, a lot of people want people to carry on, you know.
18:57Yeah.
18:57After, you know, go ahead and live your life.
18:59Not me.
19:01I want you to fall out in the street.
19:03I can't go on.
19:05How can I go on?
19:06How can I live without Lunell?
19:08My life is over.
19:09Feel free to commit Harry Carey.
19:11Any of that.
19:14I want it all.
19:15What's Harry Carey?
19:16You don't know what Harry Carey is?
19:18No, what's that?
19:19You know what Pete Davidson.
19:23Might not change the subject for a moment.
19:25I know this is not the subject that you don't talk about.
19:27That's okay.
19:27Anyone can change the subject at any time.
19:31I told Pete backstage that I had something to talk to him about, didn't I tell you?
19:35Yes, you did.
19:36And we've met now probably about four or five times.
19:38Maybe about four times, right?
19:39At least.
19:40And we've always had a great time when we met, right?
19:42Absolutely.
19:43Okay, so I've been studying you.
19:45Oh, boy.
19:48Yes, I have.
19:50Oh.
19:50And...
19:50What'd you find?
19:51Okay, so, no.
19:53This is what I want to know.
19:55Because to me, you're just an average guy.
19:58Yeah.
19:58Average dude.
19:59Yeah.
20:00Yeah.
20:01Very ordinary guy.
20:04I agree.
20:05I agree, yeah.
20:05Regular guy.
20:06Right.
20:06But you continuously pull all these bad bitches, right?
20:11Yeah.
20:17So, I don't know that I've seen you with any sisters.
20:20You probably dated them.
20:22I don't think we've seen that.
20:25Right.
20:25So, see?
20:26He said, right.
20:27Right.
20:28That's what the fuck you said.
20:30Anyway, so, since I don't get it, I want to know the mystique.
20:35Now you've had Kim K.
20:37Oh, God.
20:37Several other people.
20:38Oh, God.
20:39You got this little supermodel right now.
20:41Okay.
20:42And what I think, for the research and for women across America, I think that you should
20:47take me out.
20:53If that's what it takes to stop this.
20:57Yeah.
20:57We'll move off.
20:58We're going to move off Pete's personal life, but I will.
21:02I'm going to get you guys a gift card to a Benihana in Tarzan.
21:10Well, I just thought I would shoot my shot, you know, because people do want to know,
21:14what is the mystique?
21:16I don't know.
21:16Are you super fun or do you, you know, are you a really good time?
21:20You said that he's not Elvis.
21:22Like when you hang, Pete is like Elvis.
21:24I am.
21:25You heard me when I said that?
21:26I was once like, I remember early, like maybe 2018.
21:30Right.
21:30We were just riding around in an SUV and I was like, what is it we're doing?
21:35Like, are we going to go somewhere?
21:36And you said, John, what you have to understand is I'm like a rapper.
21:39Like a rapper?
21:40Yeah.
21:41Like he has a real mystique.
21:42You have a real electricity to you.
21:44He's a wonderful guy.
21:45Probably to go to bed.
21:45Well, have you dated him?
21:46You sound like you dated him.
21:48No, I'm just sticking up for him because there's pillows.
21:50I wasn't tearing him down.
21:51I just want to know.
21:53Okay, that's fair.
21:53But, B, don't you, why don't we go out?
21:56I want to say right now, I do not want to sleep with you, I think.
21:59Right.
22:01But I do want to go out.
22:03Like, can't you just, let's go out.
22:04Ask your little bottle girlfriend if you can take a sister out.
22:07Okay.
22:08That sounds fair.
22:09That sounds fair.
22:10That sounds fair.
22:10You want a ginger ale?
22:12You want a ginger ale?
22:12You want a ginger ale?
22:13You gonna open it for me?
22:14I can open it for you.
22:15If you don't have any straws, what is a girl supposed to do?
22:18Suck it out the cam like a Budweiser?
22:29That's pretty good.
22:31We'll try to get some straws out here.
22:33There you go.
22:34Thank you, Pete Davidson.
22:36No problem.
22:37How are you doing?
22:38You still doing cold plunge?
22:40Yeah, I'm gonna need one after tonight.
22:42Uh-huh.
22:44Um, listen.
22:46Oh, the Samo's back.
22:47Yeah, there's Samo.
22:48He's got filled with drinks and snacks.
22:49You didn't see him come out?
22:51He's awesome.
22:52There you go.
22:53All right.
22:54That thing got me in a lot of trouble last time.
22:56Let's go to the phone lines, if that's true.
22:58Please.
22:59Let's go.
23:01Okay, I'm gonna go to line one.
23:03Uh, Andrea in Los Angeles.
23:06You're on Everybody's Live.
23:07How you doing?
23:08I'm good.
23:09How are you?
23:09Very good.
23:11Uh, yeah.
23:12So I was calling because I used to be a legal estate,
23:15a legal assistant for an estate planning attorney,
23:18which means that, you know, she did trust in the state.
23:21Yeah.
23:22And I used to do the initial intake before they got referred to the lawyer.
23:28And people would come in talking about the pettiest stuff.
23:31Before their will?
23:32We had this one woman.
23:33Yeah.
23:34About what before they would write their wills, what they were gonna put in their wills.
23:37And it was always very petty.
23:39This one woman came in and said she was going to, she wanted a will, and she was gonna leave
23:45everything to her son, but she said she didn't want him to have it immediately.
23:50And that's not uncommon.
23:51If somebody leaves money to a child, you normally put it in their trust, and they'll get it when
23:55they come of age.
23:56Yeah.
23:56But her child was not a child.
23:59He was middle-aged.
24:00And so we were like, well, what is he, you know, when is he gonna inherit it?
24:05How long do you want it to be in a trust?
24:07Yeah.
24:07And she said, oh, when he comes to his senses.
24:12And so we were saying, okay, you can't have that kind of language.
24:16You have to be more specific.
24:18Is that five years, ten years?
24:20And she was like, no, just, you know, when he, you know, when he starts being crazy.
24:24She wanted the will to say when he comes to his senses?
24:27Yes.
24:29And so we said...
24:31Thank you.
24:31We said, what does that look like?
24:33What would it look like for him to come to his senses?
24:35And she goes, well, I hate his wife, and I think she's a terrible person.
24:39Okay.
24:39And one day he's gonna wake up.
24:41He's gonna wake up and leave her, and then he can have the money.
24:44Was that gonna be put in the will that...
24:50Was that gonna be put in the will that if he left his wife, he'd get his inheritance?
24:56You can't actually have that.
24:57Weirdly, the U.S. is like in love with the institution of marriage.
25:00So you actually can't will that somebody leave their spouse to get money.
25:04I'm actually on her side.
25:05I think wills should be able to have language like, once you get your act together,
25:09or once you stop dealing bullshit to everybody, you can have your inheritance.
25:12I think that's good.
25:13I think in age, you can never determine how mature a person is.
25:16So you should put in specific language that a trustee will honor.
25:19Or you could just give it to somebody else.
25:24Nice.
25:24What kind of car do you drive?
25:27Toyota Corolla.
25:28Oh, nice.
25:29That's a very popular car.
25:30Okay, talk to you later.
25:32Have you ever thought about what you want funeral-wise?
25:34Funeral-wise?
25:36Yeah.
25:37Not really.
25:38You'd be burned up.
25:40I really go back and forth.
25:42I think, I don't know.
25:44When I was younger, I thought it would be cool to have my boy drive an Escalade into my grave.
25:51And then bury me in the Escalade.
25:53Oh, you'd be in the back seat.
25:54Yeah, just like, with a cool ass outfit.
25:56Just kind of like...
25:57And then he drives it in and your friend jumps out.
26:01Yeah, and he's like, we made it.
26:02And then they, you know, bury me.
26:04You know, black people in Louisiana have been doing that for years.
26:09Let's go to one more call.
26:12Carrie in Raleigh, North Carolina.
26:14Hi, you're on Everybody's Live.
26:16Hey, how are you?
26:18Good, good.
26:18Come on, get to it.
26:20Yeah, well, so, I'm a funeral director.
26:22And over the years, I've taken a ton of different calls as far as people asking end of life questions
26:27and, you know, planning for themselves for the future.
26:30And I had a gentleman quite a while back who was calling in and, you know,
26:35was planning for himself and thinking ahead and wanted to know his options.
26:38We were talking through it.
26:39He wanted to be cremated.
26:40And then we got through the conversation as far as, okay, now what with your ashes?
26:44What do you want done?
26:45And he said, well, I know what I want you to do.
26:47I want you to flush my ashes down the toilet.
26:52Easy.
26:52You specifically?
26:54Yes.
26:55Oh, that is so hot.
26:57Okay.
26:58Thank you, Carrie in Raleigh, North Carolina.
27:02What a crazy kink.
27:03He wanted her to flush the ashes down the toilet.
27:05Yeah, save money.
27:06Yeah, saves money.
27:07Yeah, saves money.
27:09Some final degradation.
27:10You know, ladies and gentlemen, we're going to be back in one moment.
27:13But first, let's enjoy this video message.
27:19If you're watching this, I'm dead.
27:22And you must never stop trying to find out who did it.
27:26Did I say find?
27:28Wow, let's do this again.
27:31Let's go through my various properties.
27:34There's my apartment in New York.
27:36End of list.
27:37And in the event of my passing...
27:40Wait, hold on.
27:41Does this cover comas too?
27:43Don't let my nephew have my iPad.
27:45He never says hello to me when he first enters a room.
27:49It's always like 40 minutes later.
27:51My remaining fortune of residuals, which based on SAG minimums and the number of things that I've been in,
27:57is today worth $55 million.
28:01I leave that to the Richard Kind Foundation for Winded Youth.
28:09Okay.
28:10All of my bank information is on a post-it in a copy of Cigar Aficionado.
28:15It's the one with Pitbull on the cover.
28:17I have a hundred of those weird $75 prepaid visas you get at CVS.
28:21And three of the $50 ones.
28:23Griffin Dunn's about to sell me $40.
28:25Now, if I die before it happens, this money should go to anyone but Griffin Dunn.
28:30The following people have wronged me.
28:33Joel and Ethan...
28:34To Columbia House Records.
28:36I have bested you.
28:39Ha ha ha!
28:40Good luck collecting now!
28:55I like that one a lot.
28:58Welcome back!
29:00Welcome back!
29:01To Everybody's Live!
29:02I'm here with Pete Davidson and Lunell.
29:05Now, real quick, getting off topic for a second.
29:07This caught my attention over the weekend.
29:09Y'all remember Butterball from the movie Hellraiser, right?
29:12Everyone remembers Butterball from the movie Hellraiser?
29:14Well, we all know Butterball.
29:18Well, someone posted footage from their ring cam of Butterball delivering Uber Eats.
29:24This is, can we see this?
29:26This is real footage.
29:27Oh!
29:28I know, right?
29:29Oh!
29:30I mean, he...
29:32Oh my God!
29:33Look, he's bringing them back.
29:34I mean, this guy is in the first two Hellraiser movies.
29:37That is to say, he's an original Cenobank.
29:40I mean, sure, he isn't Pinhead, but the guy is classic.
29:42He's in the order of the gas!
29:45He's an angel of some!
29:47A demon to others!
29:49Exactly!
29:50Richard's exactly right!
29:51So what's messed up to me is, like, if a guy like Butterball is delivering Uber Eats,
29:57you know our industry is in the toilet.
29:59Like, this is a super talented guy.
30:01There's no reason he shouldn't be acting for the love of God.
30:08That's why...
30:10That's why I personally, not Netflix or the show, I'm giving Butterball $2,300 so he can quit
30:18Uber Eats, he can be out there auditioning again.
30:21Nobody!
30:22Nobody!
30:23Dude, Richard going, it's the order of the gas!
30:26Yeah!
30:27It's crazy!
30:28You've got to stop eating mushrooms before the show can take it.
30:33But I think Richard's just worked up because this is a travesty.
30:36That's unbelievable!
30:37Nobody should have to be an Uber Eats guy.
30:39It's pathetic.
30:40Especially not a guy who acted alongside Andrew Robinson and Claire Higgins.
30:45Of course.
30:45This is not a face that should have to deliver you food, okay?
30:50You weren't even in Hellraiser.
30:53Actors can't go back to being regular people after they've acted.
30:58Once you act, you're an actor and anything else is embarrassing.
31:03And even if you don't enjoy acting, you should keep doing it.
31:07Don't get a different job.
31:09All right.
31:10Bravo!
31:10Great, thank you.
31:11Bravo!
31:12So, we'll check in on Butterball in a couple weeks and hopefully he'll be right back on track.
31:17I'd love to welcome two people I'm very excited to see today to our panel.
31:21One of them is a TV icon and one of them is an acclaimed funeral director and licensed embalmer.
31:26Please welcome Henry Winkler and Raimundo Perez Placencia!
31:36Thank you.
31:38Thank you.
31:41Hey Henry.
31:43Hey Raimundo.
31:45Have a seat.
31:48Good to see you.
31:50All right.
31:51It is so nice to see you, Henry.
31:53Oh my gosh.
31:54I'm happy to be here.
31:55Raimundo, thank you for being on the show.
31:56Thank you for having me.
31:56Thank you for bringing your wisdom and expertise and knowledge of this field to our show.
32:01You know, there was a woman who said that you don't have height.
32:05If I stood next to Pete, you would have major difference.
32:10You'd have a scale.
32:10How tall are you, Henry?
32:11I am five six and a half.
32:13Okay, you know to the half inch.
32:14I do.
32:15What are you clocking at now?
32:16Six three.
32:17Wow.
32:17Six three inch.
32:18That's really good.
32:19Yeah.
32:20All right.
32:22I believed that I was six feet tall for most of my adult life and we measured me in the
32:27writers room.
32:28I am six feet and a half inch.
32:31Yeah.
32:31All right.
32:34Why didn't nobody ask how tall I was?
32:36I was saving you for the end, Lunell.
32:38How tall are you?
32:40I'm six foot three.
32:45Five two and proud of it.
32:46You're five two and proud of it.
32:48Maybe five four.
32:48Beautiful.
32:49With my bra on, I'm five four.
32:51And five ten in high cork wedges.
32:54Which I almost wore out here.
32:56Beautiful.
32:57Hey Henry, I had a question for you.
32:58Go ahead.
32:59In the film Night Shift, you played someone that worked at a morgue.
33:02I did.
33:02In the night shift in the morgue.
33:04Did you go and shadow any morgue employees?
33:07I did not.
33:07You did not?
33:08No.
33:08It was purely from my imagination.
33:11There was no research done.
33:12There was no preparation done.
33:13No.
33:13I didn't know anybody that had died at that time.
33:17You didn't know anyone who had died?
33:19No.
33:19At that time.
33:20At that time.
33:21Yeah.
33:21Wow.
33:22Yeah.
33:22Now, since then.
33:23Yeah.
33:24Scores.
33:28Raymundo, how did you become a funeral director?
33:30How did you get into that line of work?
33:31Yeah.
33:31Well, first and foremost, thank you for having me here.
33:34Oh, you're welcome.
33:34So, the way I got into it, graduating high school, I didn't know what to do with my life.
33:38I asked around some people.
33:40I actually had an uncle who was a cemetery manager.
33:42Got into it, got educated, became a licensed funeral director, then became a licensed embalmer
33:48during the peak of COVID, and now I'm here.
33:50And so, right out of high school, you started embalming.
33:53Did you have any, like, squeamishness about it?
33:55Was it hard to get used to it?
33:56So, no.
33:56I didn't right after high school.
33:57I have to go to mortuary school.
33:59Okay.
34:00And then graduate at that point.
34:01But, no.
34:02Is that like a regular college thing?
34:04Four years, you live in a frat house, you're all morticians.
34:06I wish.
34:07I wish.
34:08No.
34:08So, the way it works is you do two years of pre-rec, getting your general classes,
34:13and at that point, you go on and go to the actual school itself.
34:16So, I went to Cypress College, and at that point, got my associate's degree in mortuary science.
34:22You have to embalm, essentially, 200 decedents or 200 people.
34:25Oh, what?
34:25Wait a minute, what?
34:26You have to do what?
34:27Embalm.
34:28200 people?
34:29200 people, yes.
34:30And embalming is when you set them on fire?
34:32No, that's...
34:33Oh, no.
34:34Oh, wait.
34:34That's when you dress them up all nice and put them in, like...
34:38Some of it's dressing them up.
34:40Right.
34:41The first part is...
34:42Draining their blood.
34:43So, yes.
34:43You essentially...
34:45You displace the blood, essentially what it is, with formaldehyde fluid.
34:48Maldehyde.
34:49So, that might...
34:49That way, you're essentially having longer services if need be.
34:53Yes.
34:53Okay.
34:53Where's the hose go?
34:54In the neck?
34:55Yes.
34:56So, it depends on how you are, but yes.
34:57Exactly.
35:01What a good question.
35:02I'm so happy to be here for this subject.
35:06Lunell...
35:09Lunell, do you want to open casket?
35:12Darling, I'm being cremated and my ashes are gonna be spread down Las Vegas Boulevard.
35:19It's illegal.
35:21It's illegal, but I've seen them throw worse things out the window in Las Vegas, so...
35:27Raymundo, like, you seem like a pretty upbeat person.
35:31Do a lot of...
35:33Like, do you find in your field, like, do goth people sort of flock to it?
35:39Um...
35:39So, yeah, unfortunately, we do get a lot of gothic emos.
35:44Um...
35:44You know?
35:46I...
35:48I will say this.
35:49I do have a lot of goth friends and emo friends.
35:51Of course.
35:51No shade to them, of course.
35:52No, no shade and everybody who's live loves goth and he's the people.
35:56Right.
35:56Um...
35:57But when it comes to our field, I wouldn't want a gothic person speaking to you while
36:02that is happening when you've lost a lot of work.
36:04Oh, because there's a lot of, like, family outreach.
36:06I mean, it's a lot of, like, personable skills.
36:08Correct.
36:08You don't...
36:09Yeah.
36:09You have to be professional and it's hard to be professional when you look very goth-y.
36:13If you look very goth...
36:15It would be hard because it's not just...
36:17Oh, because they just want to maybe embalm with Monster Mash playing or some shit.
36:21Hey, there's nothing wrong with that.
36:23I've done that, too, during Halloween times.
36:25But again, there's a time and a place for everything.
36:29But again, it's just...
36:30You just want to have that professionalism at that point.
36:32I knew it.
36:32That's good.
36:33That's good.
36:34That's awesome.
36:35That's really awesome.
36:36Rich...
36:36Rich, cremation?
36:38No, thanks.
36:39I'm fine.
36:41Now, I...
36:42Okay.
36:43I have...
36:44There's a name-droppy thing, but I got a story.
36:47I'm at...
36:48Forgive me.
36:48It's Norman Lear's house, okay?
36:50Anyway, we're doing a reading of this script, and there's some actors there, and when we
36:55were finished, Norman says, Rue McClanahan, when she died, sent her ashes to about six different
37:03people, one of whom was Norman Lear.
37:05And he got us all out, and six...
37:08We went out to his rose garden, reached in a baggie, and just took her ashes and threw
37:13them in the rose garden.
37:14See, that's the first time I met...
37:16Blanche from Golden Girls?
37:18Yeah.
37:18You were throwing Blanche on rose.
37:20I...
37:23What a great...
37:24What a great...
37:26What a great moment in TV.
37:28A man genuinely apologizing for name-dropping, and then the names he drops are Norman Lear
37:33and Rue McClanahan.
37:35First time meeting Rue McClanahan, by the way.
37:37That's really nice.
37:38Okay, let's take...
37:39Let's take one call.
37:42April, line four.
37:44Hey, April, it's John Mulaney.
37:45You're on Everybody's Live with a fantastic panel of people.
37:49Hi there.
37:50Um, I'm actually calling in regards to cremated remains.
37:55Um, I heard Lunell speaking about wanting her ashes sprinkled down Las Vegas Boulevard.
38:00Yes.
38:01We actually decided to have my husband's cremated remains preserved, or um, processed into shotgun
38:07shells, which we fired off at his memorial service.
38:10Oh, wow.
38:10April, first off, I'm sorry for your loss, but let's get into the shotgun shells.
38:15Um, how many shells...
38:25In 2015, his remains were very...
38:27Like, there was a lot of them.
38:28That would have been, like, probably like a flat of shells, which is like eight boxes.
38:32Yeah.
38:33My husband's, we made quite a few.
38:35We had a bunch of people who fired them off, and we made some 20 gauges for my son and
38:41his
38:41friends, because that's a lighter load.
38:42Oh, that's cool.
38:43So your son...
38:44I guess it just depends on how much you weigh.
38:46Okay.
38:46Like, my mom, I have her ashes.
38:48Way lighter.
38:49So, I guess...
38:49Right, your mom might make a couple little snub-nosed bullets.
38:53Yeah.
38:53Um, was it a nice ceremony, April?
38:57Um, actually, it was lovely.
38:59We had it postponed quite a while after his passing.
39:03He passed of a brain tumor, ironically, on Brain Tumor Awareness Day.
39:07Oh.
39:08So, super fun.
39:09And went into hospice on April Fool's Day.
39:12Wow.
39:12And then his funeral was a bunch of your son's friends shooting shotguns in the air.
39:17Oh, no, no, no.
39:18My son was 10.
39:19It was all of our families and friends.
39:22Oh, okay.
39:22About three to four hundred people, and we raised money.
39:25We were going to actually start a foundation in Joe's honor, my husband.
39:30Yeah.
39:30But then COVID happened, so the first annual Average Joe Foundation trap shoot was the last so far.
39:38Because that was 2019, and then we weren't able to do anything afterward.
39:42But it was fantastic.
39:44It was a great day.
39:46Um, we had tacos, so that was fun.
39:48Oh, that's great.
39:50April, how are you doing now?
39:51Oh, God.
39:52How are you doing now?
39:53I'm okay.
39:53Life okay?
39:54All right.
39:55Um, well, you know, life is, it's a big change, but.
39:57Yeah.
39:58You do what you do when you, like, decide to.
40:01And you know what?
40:02With Joe's Ashes, it was the easiest thing to do.
40:04It made the most sense.
40:05I don't really, I've moved a few times since, like, my family has passed, and you don't
40:10really know what to do with them afterwards.
40:12You're just kind of like, oh.
40:13Exactly.
40:13Like, I put the seatbelt on them when I brought them home.
40:17I don't know if you heard, but Rue McClanahan, Blanche, so didn't know what to do that she
40:22mailed six different people.
40:23They ended up in Richard Kind's hands.
40:26So I think all the better.
40:27I did hear this.
40:27And it's.
40:28I think all the better that you blast them into the sky.
40:32Well, yeah, I used to live on the bluffs of Lake Erie, and, uh, a funeral director
40:36in our area, who I was friends with and still am, he's a great guy.
40:40Um, we had a lovely Vista where we were like, if you want to put ashes out, it's great.
40:45So, yeah.
40:47Sorry.
40:47That sounds great.
40:48Wait, what kind of car does she drive?
40:49What?
40:49Oh, yeah.
40:50April, what kind of car do you drive?
40:52I don't drive a car right now.
40:54Ooh.
40:55The hang-up.
40:55The rare no-car.
40:57Thanks for your story, April.
40:59I'm gonna hang up, but thanks for telling us, and I hope your family's doing okay.
41:03All right.
41:03Everybody, we're gonna take a short break with a piece of video.
41:08I wanted to know my height.
41:10It was hard.
41:11I'd sometimes lie down with a tape measure, and it would just snap up and hurt me.
41:16I could never get my true height.
41:18But then I learned about Know Your Age, the movement to get a height screening.
41:22Get your number and get informed.
41:25Just go into a Horizon Center and get officially measured.
41:29I'm Joe Manganiello, and I know my age.
41:38Welcome back.
41:40Hey, welcome back.
41:41I'm here with Pete Davidson, Lunell, Henry Winkler, and licensed mortician Raymundo Perez-Plasencia.
41:47Ladies and gentlemen, we are gonna interrupt for a moment because something very special happened this week.
41:51It has come to my attention that one of our PAs, Kevin Brew, sounds exactly like Kieran Culkin.
41:58Let's bring him out right now.
42:01Kevin, can you come on out here?
42:03All right.
42:07Kevin Brew.
42:09Kevin Brew.
42:10Thank you.
42:11Thank you.
42:11Are you okay, Kevin?
42:13Okay.
42:14Are you aware that you sound like Kieran Culkin?
42:17Okay.
42:18Here's the problem.
42:19Kevin Brew doesn't look anything like Kieran Culkin.
42:22But I believe underneath your chairs you'll find a blindfold.
42:26Please put it on.
42:27Those of you watching at home, please tie a sock or a t-shirt or a soft pair of exercise
42:32pants around your eyes.
42:34This experience will go a lot better for you if your eyes are totally covered.
42:40We have blindfolds for our guests.
42:42Okay.
42:44And now that this experience isn't corrupted by sight, Kevin, would you please recite Kieran Culkin's 2025 Oscar speech?
42:59To my wife, Jazz, I love you.
43:03About a year ago, I was on a stage like this and I very suddenly publicly said that I want
43:09a third kid from her.
43:11Because she said if I won the award, she would give me the kid.
43:14Turns out she said that because she didn't think I was going to win.
43:18After the show, I turned to her and I said, really, I want four.
43:22And she turned to me. I swear to God this happened.
43:24She goes, I will give you four when you win an Oscar.
43:28Then I just have to say this to you.
43:30Jazz, love of my life.
43:32Ye of little faith.
43:33No pressure.
43:34I love you.
43:35I'm really sorry I did this again.
43:36And let's get cracking on those kids.
43:38What do you say?
43:41Kevin Bruce!
43:42Oh!
43:43Or should I say, oh, hey panel, while we have the blindfolds on still, no one take them off.
43:49Is there anything while we are having this experience that you've ever wanted to hear Kieran Culkin say?
43:55Because we can make that happen right now.
43:58Anyone?
44:00I'm thinking.
44:03Nope.
44:07I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
44:09Oh, yeah. Let's hear Kevin Brew as Kieran Culkin say that.
44:13I love the smell of napalm in the morning.
44:15Ah, very good. Thank you. Thank you.
44:18Blindfolds off.
44:20Did you feel something when your blindfold was on?
44:23Maybe a little.
44:24I'm sorry. What happened, Luno?
44:26I felt something while my blindfold was on.
44:28And I think that Pete Davidson...
44:33Lou, now don't worry. We did film it.
44:35Henry, you can take them off now, baby.
44:38Thank you.
44:39You're welcome.
44:40Thank you.
44:40Has anyone ever...
44:41Can we keep these?
44:42Yeah, you can keep them. They're great for blind.
44:43What are you going to do with a blindfold, Henry?
44:46It's like a...
44:47You got the handcuffs too?
44:48No, no, no. It's like a reminder of being on the show with you.
44:52Yeah, that's nice.
44:53I'm not enough.
44:54That's so cute.
44:57Rich, open question for the panel. Pete, Henry, have you ever died in a movie?
45:02All of them.
45:05I'm that guy.
45:06Have you ever actually?
45:07Yeah, like three of the seven that I've been in.
45:10You die on screen?
45:11Yeah, usually in the first 20 minutes.
45:13Do you have a method for dying on camera?
45:16Uh, no. It's just kind of sad.
45:20Because I think that most people die...
45:22Like, can we have a dying...
45:23Let's have a dying acting contest, actually.
45:26I died in Scream.
45:27You died in Scream?
45:29I did.
45:29That's pretty cool.
45:30Did you go for horror dying or did you go for naturalistic?
45:34Well, apparently I wasn't very good at it.
45:36Ah.
45:37Because the director came up and he said,
45:39Do you think it would be more excruciating?
45:42I said, I guess so.
45:44Could you yell a little louder?
45:46Just scream?
45:47I said, sure.
45:49So how did you die...
45:52How did you die in the first take?
45:54In the first take, it was kind of like,
45:56Oh!
45:57Ah!
45:59Ah!
46:00Ah!
46:01Ah!
46:01Ah!
46:03This is how I would die on camera.
46:05Very subtle.
46:06Where's my camera?
46:07Okay.
46:07This is what I would do.
46:08Okay.
46:09Stare.
46:10And then you just let your eyes go.
46:12So...
46:14No.
46:16That was great.
46:17That was good.
46:19Lunell.
46:19I thought that was good.
46:20To camera.
46:21Let's see your best dying actor.
46:22Which camera?
46:23Which camera?
46:24Yeah.
46:25Right there.
46:28No, motherfucker.
46:29No way!
46:30I'm gonna be...
46:30I'm gonna be...
46:32I'm gonna be...
46:36I'm gonna be...
46:39So you don't die.
46:40I actually don't die.
46:42Yeah, you don't die.
46:43Right.
46:43You win.
46:44Yeah.
46:45Even in your death scene.
46:47Rich?
46:48Remember that.
46:48Can we see you die on camera?
46:50Oh.
46:52Give me a place.
46:53A situation.
46:54Am I shot?
46:54How am I dying?
46:56Oh.
46:56Like standing right there.
46:57Drop dead.
47:00Oh, wow.
47:01No, Richard!
47:02Richard!
47:02No, I'm here.
47:03Don't worry.
47:04I'm here.
47:05That's really good.
47:07Okay.
47:09Uh, we're gonna take a call.
47:12Sorry?
47:12Which one should I go to, Ashley?
47:14Oh, okay, line two.
47:15I'm gonna go to line two.
47:16What?
47:16Oh, he didn't get to die.
47:18He needs to...
47:18He needs to keep some dignity on the show
47:20because he's gonna meet with families tomorrow.
47:22I take care of you afterwards.
47:23Yeah.
47:23So we're fine, yeah.
47:24All right.
47:25We're going to EJ in Sydney, Australia.
47:27Oh, wow.
47:28EJ in Sydney, how are you?
47:31I'm good, my dear.
47:32Can you?
47:33You're so what we would hope.
47:35It's great.
47:37I'm good, man.
47:38What's your story?
47:40Uh, so I've been a comedian for about 15 years.
47:43And about 10 years ago, I became a celebrant.
47:45And then I weirdly had the two jobs crossover.
47:48So a celebrant is like a priest or a minister
47:49without the pesky religion hanging over your head.
47:52Right.
47:53Uh, so I got asked to do a comedy funeral.
47:56Oh, yeah.
47:57Yeah.
47:57So I sat down, uh, wrote all of the jokes for the family
48:01and all that sort of stuff.
48:02Uh, I normally color code them.
48:03So green is something I'd be comfortable saying
48:05in front of my nan.
48:06Uh, yellow is on the line.
48:08You color code your jokes?
48:08Red is well beyond the line.
48:09Slow down.
48:10Pardon?
48:10You color code your jokes?
48:13Yeah, yeah.
48:13Well, if I'm submitting it to the family for their approval,
48:15I want to make sure that I'm not going to absolutely destroy.
48:18For sure.
48:21How did the show go?
48:21So, uh, they kept telling me to go further and further.
48:23Yeah, how did the show go, EJ?
48:25He died.
48:26Well, the big problem was they didn't tell anybody
48:28that was attending that they were planning on doing
48:29a comedy funeral.
48:33Fantastic.
48:34I can't imagine how badly that went.
48:37Well, it's put all my comedy gigs in perspective.
48:41Absolutely.
48:41EJ, what kind of car do you drive down there in Sydney, Australia?
48:45Uh, me?
48:46I drive a Hyundai i30.
48:47A what?
48:49A Hyundai.
48:50A Hyundai?
48:51A Hyundai?
48:51Well, you call them Hyundais.
48:53We call it Hyundai, yeah.
48:54But do your own thing, man.
48:56Yes.
48:56All right.
48:57I'm going to Erica.
48:59Erica in Roswell, Georgia.
49:01Erica, what's up with you?
49:03Hi.
49:04Uh, I was a mortician for about six years.
49:07Okay.
49:07And, uh, you see a lot of weird stuff,
49:10but probably one of the weirdest experiences I ever had
49:13was we were preparing to cremate someone,
49:16and we found an extra foot.
49:19What do you mean?
49:23I mean, we go and the person died in the hospital,
49:27and typically, like, if you die in a hospital,
49:30any medical equipment on you that's disposable
49:32will kind of be in the bag with you.
49:34Okay.
49:34And so, you know, sometimes there's stuff.
49:36Oh, there was another foot in the bag?
49:40Yes.
49:40There was...
49:41Like seven?
49:42And we counted one, two, and three.
49:45And, yeah, there was...
49:46And it definitely wasn't...
49:48Well, I guess that's a stupid question.
49:50It definitely wasn't this person's foot.
49:52No, uh, we were cremating an elderly Caucasian man,
49:57and this was definitely an African-American foot.
50:00Pfft!
50:02What kind of car do you drive?
50:03See how they do us?
50:04See how they do us?
50:06Uh, I drive a Honda Odyssey.
50:11Okay.
50:12Great car.
50:13Did you burn up the foot with the body?
50:15No, no, no.
50:16We called the hospital and let them know,
50:19and they said,
50:20hey, can you bring it back?
50:21And we went, no.
50:22You're gonna come get it and sign all of these releases
50:24explaining what you did.
50:27Wow.
50:28You drive a hard bargain.
50:29I don't think I'd know to do that.
50:31I would probably just drive it back to the hospital.
50:33Thank you so much, Erica.
50:35All right.
50:35We will be back after this video message.
50:39I knew I was taller than my wife,
50:41but shorter than my house.
50:43That's why I got measured.
50:45Know your height.
50:46Know your age.
50:52I don't want to die.
50:53I'm having a blast.
50:54I do plan on stretching this thing out.
50:57Do I want to live longer?
50:59Yes.
51:00So I truly am into the longevity deal.
51:03Yeah, there's a lot of snake oil,
51:05but I'm super intrigued by what's coming.
51:10working out for our body is rule number one and two
51:14in longevity.
51:16Am I competitive?
51:19I'm trying not to be that guy,
51:21but absolutely I'm competitive.
51:24I'm a business guy,
51:26but I'm thrilled to be able to have my own path.
51:28I don't really care what people think about it.
51:32Sometimes when you're a celebrity sibling,
51:35let's just face it,
51:36we get a bad rap.
51:37I don't fault anybody for wanting questions.
51:40And how's your brother?
51:41You know, I've answered that question a bunch.
51:45You know, weird enough,
51:46we started to look a little bit more like later in life.
51:49I don't see it, you know,
51:50because, you know, my optics are a lot different.
51:53But it's been, I'm 58.
51:55And, you know, I want to be 111.
51:58And that is the plan.
52:00Treatment session completed.
52:02Yes!
52:03I've worked really hard,
52:04and I've had my teeth kicked in too.
52:06But I do it with a smile on my face,
52:07and you'll never know.
52:08So who's the actor?
52:09That's me.
52:28Hey, everybody!
52:31Making their television debut live or otherwise,
52:35it is our pleasure singing their hit song.
52:38Everybody, Mannequin Pussy!
52:56I wouldn't watch myself like a talkless enemy.
52:59Now I'm growling at a stranger.
53:01I am fighting at their teeth.
53:03If I wanted it, you really think I'd wait for some permission.
53:07For protection and absurdism,
53:09yet all would be delivered.
53:10My father's death, my mother's death,
53:13they lament this before.
53:14You say you've got a difference,
53:16they're only taking love.
53:18Like our father's death,
53:20mother's death,
53:21and only those before.
53:22The echo in return,
53:24so shit without going on.
53:26And what if we stopped spinning?
53:28And what if we just fled?
53:30And what if Jesus himself
53:32ate my fucking snack?
53:34And what if I'm an angel?
53:35Or what if I'm a boy?
53:37And what if I was confident?
53:39Would you just hate me more?
53:41Or what if I was confident?
53:49Or what if I was confident?
53:56Or what if I was confident?
54:06Or what if I was confident?
54:08Or what if I was confident?
54:10Or what if I was confident?
54:11Or what if I was confident?
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