- 2 days ago
The team attempts to solve flooding problems by converting a van into a working hovercraft. Expect chaos, water disasters, and ingenuity as Clarkson, Hammond, and May test it on rivers and canals. Steven Tyler joins as the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car.
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Follow our channel for more car crazed mayhem. Alot more episodes to come that you don't want to miss. Like our videos and share with other car lovers!!
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MotorTranscript
00:00:00Tonight, a dog looks over a wall, we drive some chairs, and the Stig does a skid in a supercharged Jag.
00:00:28Hello, everybody!
00:00:30Thank you so much.
00:00:31Thank you very much.
00:00:33Now, every year we like to take three of the latest super expensive supercars over the continental
00:00:43Europe to find out which one is best.
00:00:46But these days, thanks to the financial crisis over there, that's proving to be a bit tricky.
00:00:52Here in Britain, the economy is not that great.
00:01:09But from what we understand, over the border in Spain, things are absolutely dreadful.
00:01:15Yeah, so it really wouldn't be appropriate for us to do what we usually do and turn up in three million pound V12 monsters.
00:01:23No, because that would just look like we were showing off.
00:01:25Exactly.
00:01:26Yeah.
00:01:27But because it's Spain and therefore likely to be very sunny, we did want to be able to take the roof off.
00:01:32So what we've done is we've organised three budget convertibles for a nice drive from here in Britain to Madrid.
00:01:39I've gone for the second cheapest car in the Ferrari range, which is not necessarily a bad thing.
00:01:59It's like choosing wine in a restaurant. As we all know, the second cheapest is always your best bet.
00:02:07It's the 458 and this is the new Spider version. Available now for a very reasonable £198,000.
00:02:20I've gone for the new McLaren convertible, the 12C Spider, which amazingly is even cheaper.
00:02:29This is just £195,000.
00:02:34For that sort of money, I was expecting a sort of scout hut with windscreen wipers,
00:02:40but I've got sat-nav, I've got air conditioning, central locking, electric windows, power steering.
00:02:46It's really not bad at all.
00:02:53But when it comes to value, Iron Man had trumped both of us.
00:02:57Yes, yes, hello viewers, and as you would expect, I have done it properly.
00:03:02I've chosen the Audi R8 convertible, the V10 version.
00:03:07A mere snip at £121,000.
00:03:11Although, to be honest, from where I'm sitting, I really can't work out why it's so much cheaper than the others.
00:03:16I mean, it has the biggest engine, 5.2 litre V10 from a Lamborghini.
00:03:23It has four-wheel drive, it has the best standard equipment.
00:03:28It is the perfect car for a cash-strapped economy.
00:03:31Our first port of call, however, didn't look very cash-strapped at all.
00:03:43That's because it was Puerto Bernouz, still thriving because every summer, people from Essex come here to make themselves more orange.
00:03:50Their taste may be quiet and restrained, but it's keeping the local economy going, and it also gave James an idea for a test.
00:04:00Well, the whole point of a budget supercar is that it should be understated, right?
00:04:07So here's what we do.
00:04:08You have to drive from here to the other end of the harbour, which is over there, one at a time, and the winner is the one whose car is least photographed.
00:04:18James, I'm in a yellow metal flake convertible McLaren.
00:04:23I know.
00:04:24Well, it's going to get photographed all the time.
00:04:26Well, you chose it.
00:04:29After dusk, and with a camera fitted to record flashes, James set off, confident his grey Audi would be like a ghost.
00:04:38Hammond.
00:04:39People of Wetterman's.
00:04:46People of James May driving through your town.
00:04:49Now, get your pictures.
00:04:51Tweet sent.
00:04:52Yes.
00:04:56Annoyingly, though, our plan didn't work very well.
00:05:00See?
00:05:01Doesn't draw attention.
00:05:02The car doesn't draw attention.
00:05:04No.
00:05:05No flashes whatsoever.
00:05:09There you go.
00:05:10A successful, largely photograph-free run.
00:05:15The Ferrari attracted quite a lot more attention.
00:05:21OK, that, that, yeah, I got hit there.
00:05:23That was a lucky shot.
00:05:25Even after I'd finished.
00:05:27That does not count.
00:05:28Can I have a picture of your car, mate?
00:05:32Then Jeremy set off in his metal flake yellow McLaren.
00:05:39Oh, this is astonishing.
00:05:45A McLaren Formula One car would get less attention than this.
00:05:49Once I'd reached the finish line, no photographs, nothing, no photographs here.
00:05:54The producers handed over the score.
00:05:56I'm really tired.
00:06:00Read them out.
00:06:01Shall I read them out?
00:06:02Just read them out.
00:06:03I've just...
00:06:04Read them out.
00:06:05I just want to go to bed.
00:06:06OK, no need to do it in reverse order, do it in the order we went.
00:06:08OK.
00:06:09Audi.
00:06:10Yes.
00:06:1122.
00:06:1222 people took your picture.
00:06:13Is that good or bad?
00:06:15Ferrari.
00:06:1647 people took your picture.
00:06:21How many flashes?
00:06:24Yeah, you lost.
00:06:2530.
00:06:26You did.
00:06:27438.
00:06:28You done it.
00:06:31So, as a budget supercar, McLaren's not done well in terms of understatement, has it?
00:06:36No.
00:06:37It's a bit conspicuous.
00:06:38The next day, we left the affluent coast and headed north into what people call the real Spain.
00:06:56So, Spain, six million unemployed and they have a smaller population than we do.
00:07:02Two million households have no income at all.
00:07:0557% youth unemployment.
00:07:10Right now, though, James was dealing with rather more serious issues.
00:07:15The cabin is too blustery.
00:07:16I've got both the windows up and I have the windshield thing at the back up.
00:07:21But my hair still whips me in the eyeballs.
00:07:23And I know some of you are going,
00:07:24Well, why don't you get your hair cut then?
00:07:26Lots of people have lots of hair.
00:07:35James has now cured the appalling buffeting in the Audi with a simple addition of a bandana.
00:07:43Which makes him look very manly.
00:07:49We decided to stop in the next town for some coffee.
00:07:52And here we saw just how badly hit Spain has been by the financial crisis.
00:07:58These are all brand new flats.
00:08:08There's nobody here.
00:08:11I mean nobody at all.
00:08:13It's got all the infrastructure.
00:08:17Street lights, pedestrian crossings, but no people at all.
00:08:24Look at it.
00:08:28It's a scene from a horror film.
00:08:34I mean, you hear about these ghost towns, but you don't really think they exist.
00:08:40Still, on the upside, the echoey, empty streets did provide the perfect setting for a noise test.
00:08:48I parked at the far end of town, while Jeremy fired up his decibel-o-meter.
00:08:53Well, I say Jeremy has a decibel-o-meter.
00:08:57It's the decibel-o-meter ab.
00:09:00It's probably rubbish.
00:09:03I'm slightly worried about this, because he's got two more cylinders than we have.
00:09:07He's got two more.
00:09:08So that's two more.
00:09:09One more cylinder firing per bank.
00:09:11Yes.
00:09:12So that's two more.
00:09:13He's got two banks of five.
00:09:14We've got two banks of four.
00:09:15Yeah, so he's got two more explosions per turn.
00:09:19For whatever time they're firing, there'll be one more.
00:09:22Yeah, but that's on each bank.
00:09:24Yeah.
00:09:25Welcome to Top Gear, the world's leading motoring show.
00:09:28Here we go.
00:09:291.05.
00:09:301.05.
00:09:31Yeah.
00:09:32Next, it was the McLaren's turn.
00:09:46I'm ready.
00:09:47Oh, good.
00:09:48Begin.
00:09:49You see, start quietly.
00:09:50Hold it in second.
00:09:51So when we get near the decibel-o-meter, I'm at the top of the rev range.
00:10:03Here we go.
00:10:05Yes!
00:10:06Now that was mighty.
00:10:09What's my score?
00:10:14105.
00:10:15What?
00:10:16105 again.
00:10:17What, the same as his?
00:10:19Yeah.
00:10:20That's very much the same, yes.
00:10:21Rubbish.
00:10:22With Jeremy still complaining, I lined up the Ferrari.
00:10:28I bet he just goes flaws it from the start.
00:10:31Yeah, he has.
00:10:32Daft as a brush.
00:10:33He's just trying to go as fast as possible.
00:10:35Stupidest man in the world.
00:10:40107.
00:10:41Hammond was, as ever, gracious in victory.
00:10:55Come on, it's still more.
00:10:57And those last few decibels are harder to get.
00:10:59It's like the last few miles an hour because of aerodynamics or something.
00:11:01No, wait.
00:11:02That must mean you lose.
00:11:03It does.
00:11:04It does.
00:11:05It does.
00:11:06No.
00:11:07It's budget supercars.
00:11:08Discretion.
00:11:09The quietest.
00:11:10Yeah.
00:11:11Really?
00:11:12Is it?
00:11:13We've just decided.
00:11:14We've just changed.
00:11:15Yeah.
00:11:16The exact mantle which you last and I were.
00:11:17No, no, no, no, no.
00:11:18We never discussed rules.
00:11:19We didn't say.
00:11:20We just said.
00:11:23Back on the move, we headed for the Sierra Nevada mountains.
00:11:26On what is not only the highest road in Europe, but also one of the most spectacular.
00:11:38This is perfect supercar country.
00:11:44When the McLaren MP4 first came out 18 months ago, it was better than a Ferrari 458 in every measurable way.
00:11:55But it lacked panache.
00:11:58It lacked zing.
00:11:59It lacked excitement.
00:12:00It felt clinical and antiseptic.
00:12:05Since then, though, they've made lots of little changes.
00:12:08So now there's more noise and even more power.
00:12:14But the big thing is all that sky.
00:12:27This is what the McLaren was always meant to be.
00:12:31Open top.
00:12:32By taking off the roof, they've turned the McLaren from a car you admire into a car you want.
00:12:41Oh, you really, really want this.
00:12:44There's no denying it, the Ferrari is down on power compared to the McLaren.
00:12:53Overall, it makes about 50 brake horsepower fuel.
00:12:57But it is lighter.
00:12:58It's the lightest here.
00:12:59Nevertheless, I am not complaining.
00:13:07The point and squirtability of this thing.
00:13:08Okay, a bit of wrestling to get it around the corner and then...
00:13:22What a soundtrack!
00:13:26Meanwhile, back in the cheap seats...
00:13:31Right, serious stuff.
00:13:37This Audi is, give or take a few quid, £70,000 cheaper than the other two.
00:13:49So why?
00:13:50Well, it's got a slightly lower top speed.
00:13:53It's slightly slower to 60 miles an hour.
00:13:56It weighs quite a bit more.
00:13:57And with the best one in the world, it does have a second-hand engine.
00:14:01But, it does have four-wheel drive.
00:14:07And then, there's the new gearbox.
00:14:10It used to be the single clutch flappy paddle type.
00:14:14It's now twin clutch, seven speed.
00:14:16And it is absolutely fantastic.
00:14:19Right, listen to this.
00:14:21A gear.
00:14:22A gear.
00:14:23Seriously, it is superb.
00:14:28Intoxicated by our cut-priced supercars, we climbed higher and higher.
00:14:35Come on Hammond, try and live with this.
00:14:40God, it announces its arrival.
00:14:46And the road got better and better.
00:14:51Snow.
00:14:53Look at that.
00:14:55This road is just staggering.
00:15:00How much did it cost?
00:15:04Oh.
00:15:07Oh.
00:15:12Well, that's it.
00:15:17And stop.
00:15:18Well, hang on a second.
00:15:20You know the road was really quiet?
00:15:22Yes.
00:15:23Yes.
00:15:24Would you like to know why?
00:15:25Yes.
00:15:26It doesn't go anywhere.
00:15:27That's the end.
00:15:28I can't wait to see the road that leads to a city.
00:15:30It's going to be absolutely awesome.
00:15:32It must, if it goes somewhere.
00:15:34Yeah.
00:15:35How much money did that cost?
00:15:36Yeah, a lot.
00:15:37Anyway, what we learned, what we learned on the road to absolutely nowhere at all, is just how fast that McLaren is.
00:15:54Yeah.
00:15:55I mean, it was fast when it first came out, but now.
00:15:58It's astonishing.
00:15:59And when you're in a Ferrari, you do not expect to be left behind by anything.
00:16:03No, I mean, on the straights, it just walks away.
00:16:05Honestly, it was, it was like you were in a Nissan Micra and I was in a supercar.
00:16:08That's the straights, the corners were worse because following the McLaren, you watch it go around at a speed and you think, oh, I'll go around at the same speed and you can't.
00:16:17No.
00:16:18It's unbelievable.
00:16:19Can I just say, actually, the McLaren is epic, I agree with you, but in the two tests we have conducted so far, the victor is the Audi.
00:16:28Yeah.
00:16:29Yes, it tied with the McLaren for one of them.
00:16:31We also did an economy run.
00:16:32Yes, we did.
00:16:33And the Audi won that as well.
00:16:35Yes, it did.
00:16:36So anyway, later on there will be more cut price supercar larks from Spain.
00:16:41But in the meantime, here is the news.
00:16:44No.
00:16:45I've got an announcement to make first.
00:16:48Really?
00:16:49Yes.
00:16:50Last week, in a bid to show that Britain is not too crowded to have fun in a nice car.
00:16:56I took a Ferrari to this road, okay, and I said that even though this was just 40 miles from London, in Hertfordshire, there was no traffic at all and you could still enjoy it in the Ferrari that I was using.
00:17:12Well, we have been inundated with complaints.
00:17:15And I do mean inundated.
00:17:16Oh, there have been a lot.
00:17:17A lot.
00:17:18And people were absolutely furious.
00:17:20How dare the BBC say this is Hertfordshire.
00:17:24It plainly isn't.
00:17:25Yeah.
00:17:26Well, you're right.
00:17:27I admit it and I apologise.
00:17:28That is not Hertfordshire.
00:17:30It's Buckinghamshire actually.
00:17:32Nevertheless, well spotted all of you for seeing that you were on the ball there.
00:17:37Hey now, we've got some important consumer news for everybody.
00:17:40When you go into a car showroom now, the salesman will try to sell you lots of electronic bits and bobs for your car.
00:17:46Here's our top gear, top tip.
00:17:48Don't bother with any of them.
00:17:50Because they don't work.
00:17:51Any of them.
00:17:52Bluetooth.
00:17:53Bluetooth.
00:17:54Bluetooth never works.
00:17:55It doesn't.
00:17:56Hammond uses it and it's like he's sitting at the bottom of a river.
00:17:58Yeah, well, to be fair, sometimes I am.
00:18:01Shall I tell you, shall I tell you the thing that doesn't work most of all, voice activation.
00:18:06Oh, that's just a shouting match.
00:18:07No, because you're driving along, you don't have to take your hands off a wheel.
00:18:10You go, call Richard Hammond.
00:18:11Collapsing suspension.
00:18:12It does.
00:18:13Oh dear, it misunderstood me.
00:18:16Call Richard Hammond.
00:18:19Deflating tyres.
00:18:21That's it.
00:18:22That's it.
00:18:23That's it.
00:18:24Reinflate tyres.
00:18:25Reinflate tyres.
00:18:26Calling Richard Hammond.
00:18:28Because the problem is, is that in the olden days, or when it first came out, voice activation
00:18:33was just for the radio or for the satellite navigation, something.
00:18:36So now it's for every single feature on the car and in your life.
00:18:40And it has to understand every accent in all of Britain.
00:18:42So it's, ee, ee, ee, ee, ee, or okay, the new.
00:18:45And it's just, all right, Pat.
00:18:47And it's just, it just can't cope.
00:18:49So if you're just driving along, you're Radio 2.
00:18:51Accessing bank account.
00:18:53What the hell?
00:18:55Transferring funds.
00:18:57Scott, no, don't.
00:18:59While we're having a moan, I don't like electric boot closing.
00:19:02You know, where you hit the button.
00:19:03With you on there.
00:19:04What's, what was the matter with slamming a boot lid?
00:19:06Yeah, so instead of doing that, it's just, the idea is you press the button, and then
00:19:10the boot sets off, and you can get in your car.
00:19:12But it's so slow.
00:19:13Mmmmm.
00:19:14By the time you've got in your car, your dog has seen its opportunity and made a break
00:19:18for freedom.
00:19:19He's in the track.
00:19:20It's just.
00:19:21Or worse, it's going, mmmmm.
00:19:22And then it detects your shopping of the boot, and it thinks, that could be a child.
00:19:26Mmmmm.
00:19:27Yeah.
00:19:28He goes, oh look, it's a package of dog biscuits, it's not a baby.
00:19:33Fire the airbag in three.
00:19:35Don't fire the airbag!
00:19:37Too much responsibility for.
00:19:38No, modern cars are deeply irritating because of the electronics.
00:19:42Can I move it on now?
00:19:43No.
00:19:44Now, last week I asked if you would send in photographs of Jeremy on his new bicycle.
00:19:50Because, well, I didn't expect to get anything because frankly I didn't believe he'd bought
00:19:55a bicycle.
00:19:56I have.
00:19:57Well?
00:19:58I have.
00:19:59Do you know, I now believe you, I know you have, because somebody has sent in a picture,
00:20:01and here he is, Jeremy, on his bicycle.
00:20:02It's, um...
00:20:03It's, uh...
00:20:04It's working.
00:20:05You are losing weight.
00:20:06It's your trimming down.
00:20:07It's working.
00:20:08That's not my bike.
00:20:09I haven't got stabilisers.
00:20:10Otherwise it's pretty accurate.
00:20:11Hey, I've got some serious news.
00:20:12A lot of cars these days have got a sport button on them, okay?
00:20:14The idea is you push it and it makes everything more taut and more racy, okay?
00:20:19But I've long harbored a suspicion that it doesn't actually make the car go any faster,
00:20:22so last week we did a test.
00:20:23We've got a new Golf GTI down here, which incidentally is a brilliant, brilliant car.
00:20:26Really good!
00:20:27It's probably probably the same thing.
00:20:28Quite a lot.
00:20:29You have to put a bike.
00:20:30You have to put a bike.
00:20:31You are the same bike.
00:20:32It's probably the same bike...
00:20:33The same bike.
00:20:34You have to put a bike.
00:20:35It's probably the same bike.
00:20:36You're the same bike.
00:20:37So, we have to put a bike.
00:20:38Wow.
00:20:39brilliant, brilliant car. It's properly good. Anyway, got the Stig, put him in
00:20:44normal mode, sent him around the track and he did a 129.6, okay? We then put it
00:20:49in Sport, which beefed up the suspension and the front differential and it made
00:20:54the steering heavier and it quickened the throttle response, okay? In Sport, 129.6.
00:20:59Well, exactly the same. Exactly the same. We then put it in comfort mode, makes
00:21:04everything soft and gooey. 129.5. Fast. Fast. That is confirmation that the Sport
00:21:12button just makes a car more uncomfortable. Yeah, it shouldn't say Sport, it should
00:21:15just say Worse. Now, there's a new supercar, it's called the Icona Volcano, here it is.
00:21:23Look, Jeremy, did you do that publicity photo? That's what I call a publicity shot. I love
00:21:30that very much. Not sure about the car though. They say it has a V12 hybrid but
00:21:37they won't tell us where the V12's from or how the hybrid system works. All they
00:21:41will say is it develops 950 horsepower and will go 217 miles an hour. Does it? No, the
00:21:49reason I brought this car up is their chief design director. His name is Samuel Chufffart.
00:21:56Giveover. Giveover. It's not, his name is not Chufffart. No. Chufffart. Lovely. There's a man with fond
00:22:08memories of his school days. Every register, oh no, he's got to Christian, I'm next. Chufffart.
00:22:15I bet it's not what he never wore off for him. No, apparently he worked at Jaguar for a while,
00:22:20not sure what happened there. I think they probably had to let him go.
00:22:23So now he's ended up in Italy because that is an Italian firm. They're actually making the car in
00:22:30China. Can you imagine what the wiring's going to be like? Chufffart in Italian probably means
00:22:35hat penis anyway or something like that. We actually asked our researchers to call up this company and
00:22:40say, yeah, can you tell us more about the car? And not one of them could get through the beginning
00:22:44bit of the phone call. That bursts again. You put the receptionist on the other end,
00:22:47must be used at the phone ringing. There's someone laughing. Yeah, I'll put you through.
00:22:50Uh-oh, Chufffart. He probably just answers the phone with the words,
00:22:54yes, that is my name. Let's clear the air on that one.
00:23:00That's how that picture came about. Someone lit a match just after Chufffart.
00:23:08Moving on, because this week we are testing the McLaren 12C Spider, the Ferrari 458 Spider,
00:23:14and the Audi R8 V10. Let me guess. Is it Spider?
00:23:18Do you know it is? It's Spider. Now, we have chosen budget supercars because we are in Spain,
00:23:24where the economic problems are terrible. Yeah, so far we've been to a ghost town. It had a hospital,
00:23:29it had a school, it had restaurants, had thousands of houses and flats, but no people at all. We've been
00:23:34on a road that went nowhere. It was like filming in a ghost country, actually. Anyway, we pick up the story
00:23:40after a night in a hotel in Granada.
00:23:46We headed north the following morning, worried that we'd hit the rush hour traffic. However...
00:24:12So there's only three cars on this motorway and we're in all of them. Look at that. Our own personal motorway. I've always wanted a motorway.
00:24:25Since no one was around, we thought we'd see how fast our cars would go.
00:24:31We just need to find a straight bit. This is quite straight.
00:24:36Nice. 200 miles an hour, this slight corner becomes a hairpin bend. Arrow straight.
00:24:47When we did eventually find a long enough straight, it had goats on it.
00:24:53So we were about to give up on our top speed run. But then...
00:24:58Ooh, an airport. Chaps, is that an airport?
00:25:02I just thought... Yeah, an airport, it is. Well, if the runway's as busy as the roads,
00:25:08we might be able to use the runway for our speed test.
00:25:17God, there's some parking available.
00:25:21All of it, in fact.
00:25:26Uh, where is everyone?
00:25:33We went inside to look for someone in charge.
00:25:39Hi.
00:25:42Hello.
00:25:44But the whole place was completely deserted.
00:25:51The computers are all on. Look, I can make a package check.
00:25:53No, go on.
00:25:54I've got one of those things that goes...
00:25:56I can check you in.
00:25:57Oh, the wheels come on.
00:26:04My wheels come on.
00:26:05Oh, the wheel.
00:26:06Hello.
00:26:07I'll be Lufthansa. I'm sorry, the gate is closed.
00:26:09Well, could you just open it?
00:26:10Nine.
00:26:12Uh, I haven't got a passport. I've just got a selection of weapons and some concealed drugs.
00:26:19Eventually, though, we found what we came for.
00:26:23That is a runway over there, I believe.
00:26:25But since there was no one around to ask for permission to use it, we had to improvise.
00:26:34Would it be possible for us to drive on the runway here?
00:26:37Is there any flight traffic today?
00:26:39No, it's very quiet today.
00:26:41Is it?
00:26:41I should imagine it'll be fine.
00:26:44Right.
00:26:49With permission granted, we headed out to the runway.
00:26:53It's all right, I've got it.
00:26:54I've got it. It's okay.
00:26:57I can't do manual labour, you know that.
00:27:04Look at that.
00:27:05It's ours.
00:27:19The runway was a whopping 2.5 miles long, more than enough to max our cars.
00:27:26Hammond elected to go first.
00:27:30I'm always nervous when he drives in a straight line.
00:27:33Richard Hammond, can you drive in a straight line down a runway?
00:27:36Yes, what can possibly go wrong with that?
00:27:39Hit the launch control button with it in race and manual.
00:27:44Give it max revs.
00:27:45My right foot.
00:27:46Left foot off.
00:27:47Bang!
00:27:48We're away.
00:27:48It does the first gear change for me and now it's up to me.
00:27:52And already we're doing 85, 90, 100 mile an hour.
00:27:57That quickly.
00:27:58Damn, this thing is fast!
00:28:03Oh, look at that dust cloud.
00:28:0498, 141.
00:28:09I can hear the grip hitting the underside of the car.
00:28:12There's a lot on it.
00:28:13Seventh gear has just been hit.
00:28:14175 miles an hour.
00:28:17Still accelerating hard.
00:28:18So I can see the line, 186, 87, 88.
00:28:23Come on, Ferrari, accelerate!
00:28:25Now that is a Ferrari at full chat.
00:28:2890, 91, 92, 93, 193 miles an hour.
00:28:38Top speed of cheap.
00:28:41Next up, it was James, who decided to use absolutely all of the available space.
00:28:47Right, here we go.
00:28:48Sports.
00:28:49Sports suspension.
00:28:50Aircon is off.
00:28:51Manual one.
00:28:52Here we go.
00:28:54And V-Max.
00:28:58Right, here he comes now.
00:28:59Captain Slow is his name, or the Italians call him Mr. Slowly.
00:29:06That's 80.
00:29:08I know at some point in that car, when he's doing his run, he is saying Buffeting.
00:29:13Buffeting.
00:29:16He's moving along in the right direction.
00:29:19It's weird to think James May's in there doing that speed.
00:29:22Spaniel in control of that.
00:29:25Indicating 175, 177.
00:29:28Come on!
00:29:32That said, 186.
00:29:36Knowing that modern day speedos are frighteningly accurate, I knew what speed I had to beat.
00:29:42Hammond's 193.
00:29:44Okay, launch control.
00:29:47First gear.
00:29:49Press launch.
00:29:50Launch active.
00:29:53Three, two, one, go!
00:29:56Oh, wow, that's quick.
00:30:0080 miles an hour already.
00:30:03Here he comes.
00:30:05He's moving at tremendous speed.
00:30:07One hundred and forty.
00:30:08One hundred and forty.
00:30:11I'm taking manual control now.
00:30:14To lock it in six.
00:30:15I don't want it to go into seven.
00:30:18Because that will slow it down.
00:30:21Come on!
00:30:21One nine one.
00:30:22One nine three.
00:30:24One nine four.
00:30:25One nine five.
00:30:26One nine six.
00:30:27One nine seven.
00:30:28One nine seven again.
00:30:30Two miles through when I'm indicated.
00:30:34One hundred and ninety eight.
00:30:37Victory, therefore, is mine.
00:30:40Annoyingly, though, we weren't finished because James had come up with an idea.
00:30:45It's a drag race, but because of the weather, especially what it's doing today, you have to start with your roof down and you have to finish with your roof up.
00:30:55And that's not quite as simple as it sounds.
00:30:58Well, no, it isn't because I can operate this roof while I'm driving.
00:31:03So can I?
00:31:04He can't.
00:31:05You can't.
00:31:06No, Ferrari, you have to.
00:31:07You have to stop.
00:31:08Which means, hang on.
00:31:09No, no, actually, wait.
00:31:10This is quite interesting.
00:31:12I can do 19 miles an hour.
00:31:15Yeah.
00:31:15And put the roof up.
00:31:16How fast can you go?
00:31:1731.
00:31:18You're joking.
00:31:19But officially, your roof, I think, goes up in 14 seconds and mine's about 19.
00:31:24This is very complicated.
00:31:25So the flag drops.
00:31:26Yes.
00:31:27Yeah.
00:31:28I set off, but I can only go 19 miles an hour while the roof's coming up.
00:31:31Then I can go.
00:31:32Yep.
00:31:33You can go to 31 miles an hour.
00:31:35But I have to stay there for longer.
00:31:37Because your roof takes longer to go up.
00:31:39You can't set off at all until your roof's up.
00:31:42But then you go like hell.
00:31:43Yeah, you launch control and go like hell.
00:31:45Yeah.
00:31:47Having settled on a half mile distance, we lined up and our Spanish starter began the countdown.
00:31:53One, two, three, two, one.
00:32:00We begin.
00:32:00We begin.
00:32:01We begin.
00:32:01We begin.
00:32:02I'm down, but it lost.
00:32:02They're moving away.
00:32:03I'm not going anywhere.
00:32:04We begin.
00:32:05Less than 19, 18 miles an hour.
00:32:0819, 18.
00:32:10We begin.
00:32:11Come on.
00:32:12Hurry up.
00:32:13Oh, I've exceeded the roof speed.
00:32:18Bang.
00:32:20Oh, God.
00:32:21Struggling for quick.
00:32:22Windows are going up now.
00:32:23Roof latched.
00:32:24I am away.
00:32:28I'm past James and it's jammed.
00:32:30Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.
00:32:33I did that wrong.
00:32:41We lined up for a second attempt.
00:32:45Right, glasses on so I can read when the roof is latched.
00:32:50Right, keep finger on the button and concentrate on the speed.
00:32:52Here we go.
00:33:01Keep it below 19 miles an hour driving.
00:33:0418, 19.
00:33:05I'm waiting until the roof is up and just before the back hatch goes down, I'm going to hit the launch control button.
00:33:10There.
00:33:11Oh, come on.
00:33:13This feels astonishingly slow.
00:33:15Night.
00:33:16Oh, twirls.
00:33:16Roof operation in progress.
00:33:18That's down.
00:33:19I can go now.
00:33:22Come on, roof closed.
00:33:30Changing you with my left hand.
00:33:32How multitasking was that?
00:33:35I am passing James May.
00:33:37They're getting closer to the line.
00:33:39I think Jeremy is going to cross now, but I'm getting closer to the Audi man.
00:33:42A second.
00:33:43Hammond's coming.
00:33:45I'm going to get him.
00:33:45I'm going to get him.
00:33:48Second.
00:33:48Oh, ho, ho, ho.
00:33:51Victory has been mine.
00:33:57Weirdly though, James had a different view.
00:34:00The Audi's basically won all of that.
00:34:03I'm sorry, James.
00:34:04I think you'll find the McLaren got there miles before you.
00:34:07Highest top speed.
00:34:09McLaren.
00:34:09McLaren.
00:34:11So the McLaren's won both things.
00:34:13However, could I draw your attention to a few things?
00:34:16A completely ruined back wheel.
00:34:19Same on the other side.
00:34:20I don't need to remind you of that.
00:34:21Up here, we find a very badly chipped windscreen.
00:34:25Hammond did that.
00:34:25Look at that.
00:34:26It doesn't matter who did it.
00:34:27It's very badly chipped.
00:34:28You also have a very badly chipped windscreen.
00:34:31Where is it?
00:34:32Over there.
00:34:33You have ruined wheels.
00:34:34And if you look down here, a cameraman wants to come and see this.
00:34:37This bit of the bodywork has actually been eaten away.
00:34:43And that wasn't the only problem caused by the dust and grit on the unused runway.
00:34:50Oh, look at the knee!
00:34:52Oh, God!
00:34:54The Audi, meanwhile, was totally unmarked.
00:34:58Why do the Germans put paint on in such a way that it doesn't then come off?
00:35:02Because they are Germans and it is impossible to paint a car badly.
00:35:08Conceding James's point, we got back on the road.
00:35:11And with evening approaching, it was time to look for somewhere to stay.
00:35:17Chaps?
00:35:18Yes?
00:35:20I've had yet another brilliant idea.
00:35:24Have you what?
00:35:26Well, instead of looking for a hotel, why don't we just go into the next town and help ourselves to a house?
00:35:32Well, okay.
00:35:37It's not a bad idea.
00:35:41In the next town, we started house hunting and frankly, we were spoilt for choice.
00:35:47It's quite like a view.
00:35:49Well, that one's gardens all overgrown. I don't fancy that.
00:35:54I don't want one with a dog.
00:35:55How about 53? Do you like 53? Or 55?
00:36:03As a number, I prefer 55.
00:36:07With that settled, we moved in.
00:36:09Oh, it's nice.
00:36:11Oh, no.
00:36:13Junk mail.
00:36:15Is this the bedroom? I'm going to have this.
00:36:17Sink.
00:36:19Hasn't actually got a bed in it, but it'll be all right.
00:36:22Oh, look at this.
00:36:23I've got bath, bidet, bog.
00:36:27Hammond?
00:36:28Yes?
00:36:28We've found your room.
00:36:30Let me guess. Is it small?
00:36:31It's low.
00:36:32It's not.
00:36:33Oh, that sounds sweet. Look at that.
00:36:37I'm happy with that.
00:36:39Having brightened the place up with some decorations, Jeremy cooked us a paella while we discussed our cars.
00:36:47If we have to identify the best budget supercar, it's the Audi. There's no question about it.
00:36:51If you have to identify the best car, it's the Ferrari.
00:36:54No, no, no, it isn't.
00:36:56Yes, it is.
00:36:56It isn't.
00:36:56It is.
00:36:58Well, it isn't. The McLaren's a better car.
00:37:00It's not a better supercar.
00:37:01We didn't say supercar, you said car.
00:37:04Okay, best supercar.
00:37:05Well, now, you see that, the best supercar is the Ferrari.
00:37:09Yes, exactly.
00:37:10The best car is the McLaren.
00:37:11Yeah, but if I'm buying a supercar, I'm buying a supercar.
00:37:12And the winner of this test, so far, is the Audi.
00:37:16Is the Audi.
00:37:17I'll go with that entirely.
00:37:18Yes. Not very useful for the viewers.
00:37:22With dinner served, we carried on trying to reach a verdict, but it was hopeless.
00:37:28Yes, it is, but the Ferrari they've injected.
00:37:30There's some magic in the Ferrari.
00:37:32With the roof off, it is properly good.
00:37:34Really?
00:37:34I couldn't.
00:37:35No, wait.
00:37:36£70,000 will buy a cook.
00:37:39Would it interfere with this debate if I were suddenly and violently sick?
00:37:43Well, I'm not wondering, when he's waiting for a film to download on his computer, he isn't
00:37:53sitting there going, buffering, buffering, buffering.
00:37:57Very funny.
00:37:58Now, look, we want to make it absolutely clear, that airport is not a film set.
00:38:02It opened five years ago, then it went bust, then it closed down last year.
00:38:07Yeah, it's amazing though, isn't it, if you think about it?
00:38:09I mean, we all have unused things lying around.
00:38:12I've got a bread maker and a what?
00:38:13I haven't got an international airport.
00:38:15No, look about that.
00:38:17Did you see what that runway did to my Ferrari?
00:38:19Mmm, and you should see what happens to it later on, shouldn't we, Richard Hammond?
00:38:23I don't think you really want to hang on and watch that.
00:38:26Maybe turn over to Countryfile now.
00:38:27No, no, James.
00:38:29James, would you stay with Top Gear or switch over to see Adam's Farm?
00:38:32Well, let me have a think, yes, I'd stay with Top Gear.
00:38:34I'd stay with Top Gear, but anyway, thanks then.
00:38:36This is now, and we must put a star in our reasonably priced car.
00:38:40Now, my guest tonight is best known for dying and then coming back to life.
00:38:47But, it's not the baby Jesus.
00:38:50It is the man who played Sherlock Holmes on the television.
00:38:54Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Benedict Cumberbatch!
00:38:57Oh, very well, very well.
00:39:04Nice, nice to meet you.
00:39:07Have a seat.
00:39:09Wow, wow, wow, wow.
00:39:11Thank you very much.
00:39:12Now, that was a welcome.
00:39:16That was a welcome from a lot of people who want to know how you're not dead.
00:39:22Well, when I jump off, there's a helicopter with Mycroft in it dressed as a woman and an inflatable
00:39:29skirt, and then he takes a pill, which basically means that the helicopter's...
00:39:33I'm not going to tell anyone.
00:39:34I can't.
00:39:35Well, no, I was really enjoying that, because it was obviously one of the most
00:39:40written about and talked about events in modern television history.
00:39:43And I wasn't here.
00:39:44I sort of missed it, the furore at home anyway.
00:39:48I was abroad, but I just, I heard that it went on for weeks in that kind of horrible...
00:39:51It did, but you actually fell off a building, and then you're not dead.
00:39:54Yeah.
00:39:55Even though we saw you dead, but anyway.
00:39:57Yeah.
00:39:58So when did we find out how that had been achieved?
00:40:01I think it's going to be sometime near the end of this year, or at the very beginning of next year.
00:40:04That's what we're aiming for.
00:40:05Obviously, more recently, we've seen you in the new Star Trek movie.
00:40:08Yeah.
00:40:09Anyone seen that?
00:40:10It is.
00:40:11Absolutely.
00:40:12And you are a damn good baddie, if I may be so bold.
00:40:15Thank you very much.
00:40:16But it does beg the question, why are the Americans incapable of casting an American
00:40:22as the baddie in any film?
00:40:24Yeah, I don't know.
00:40:24I had a sort of pet theory that they do vowels, which is sort of warm and loving and feeling.
00:40:28We do consonants, which is sharp and intelligent and thinking.
00:40:31That's as hippie, mad, out, left field as I can get with it.
00:40:35I don't...
00:40:35We sound more intelligent.
00:40:37Sort of, and maybe that's scary for them, I don't know.
00:40:40End of my US career.
00:40:41Yes, I was going to say, one of the things I must ask is now that you've appeared in Star Trek,
00:40:46do you find yourself being approached by those of a Trekkie disposition?
00:40:51The ones I have met are remarkably normal, and it is a bit like, I'm quite a Trekkie fan, actually.
00:40:57You are?
00:40:57No, no, no, no, but that was me pretending to be one, but thank you for that.
00:40:59Oh, okay, no, you're such a good actor, I thought actually you were one.
00:41:03Fooled you there, Jeremy, fooled you there.
00:41:06I mean, I wasn't actually, I wasn't a Trekkie.
00:41:07I watched the first film, I was very into that, and then I obviously did a little bit of research,
00:41:12as far as what I was about to do in the canon, and I really got into it.
00:41:16I mean, I do, you do sometimes worry about saying you like Star Trek,
00:41:20but I've always liked it, ever since it was Kirk and Spock, right the way through Jean-Luc Picard.
00:41:24Yeah, it's a great relationship, it's a great relationship.
00:41:26Yeah, I don't see that right, what relationship?
00:41:29Between Kirk and Spock and Bones, I think those three, no, you see, this is it.
00:41:32If I talk about relationship between two men in a drama, they're immediately at it.
00:41:36Well, I mean, yeah.
00:41:37The worldwide interlie will just basically go, splat, there's a load of fan fiction,
00:41:41which has me and John Watson floating in space on a bed, handcuffed to one another.
00:41:47Not, not, not just with handcuffs either.
00:41:49Yeah, I could write that tonight, it would be fun.
00:41:53Um, you're from an acting family.
00:41:55I am, my mum and dad are both actors, uh, mum, uh, both actually,
00:41:59they, my car history sort of begins with them.
00:42:01I sort of was introduced to cars by them by...
00:42:02Well, I was interested, we've got a photograph of your mum here, look.
00:42:06Yeah.
00:42:06Now, my mum didn't have a car like that.
00:42:09That's quite cool.
00:42:11It's very cool, very cool.
00:42:12Is that from a Gerry Anderson?
00:42:13It is, it's from UFO, yeah.
00:42:15No, she was in UFO.
00:42:16She was in UFO.
00:42:17So that obviously wasn't her car, that was a...
00:42:18Uh, no, but she did drive it and it was drivable.
00:42:20She had an MGT, um, an MGB, I should say, a hatchback.
00:42:25Not a hatchback, sorry, a soft top.
00:42:26Yeah.
00:42:26Um, but all cars before I was born, when I was born, it all got a bit sensible.
00:42:30She had a Mini, uh, which was great.
00:42:33Because that was my first car.
00:42:34Was it?
00:42:35Yeah, boring car.
00:42:35Your first car was actually a proper Mini, then?
00:42:37A little Mini.
00:42:37Class it?
00:42:38Uh, no, but I did, uh, reverse after a night out over a very large rock on a driveway
00:42:43and the gear stick just went thunk right through the chassis of the car.
00:42:46That's a Mini, yeah.
00:42:47So next car was a...
00:42:48Uh, a Golf Mitsubishi Colt from 1982 hatchback white rust bucket, yeah.
00:42:54No, not a Golf, sorry, Mitsubishi Colt, yeah.
00:42:55So your own GT and a Golf Mitsubishi?
00:42:57Yeah.
00:42:59I'm getting my...
00:43:00I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm cross-splicing in some future world because...
00:43:02Yeah, no, there's a lot of car jumbling going on.
00:43:05It's a good job I don't let it do your job, I'd be rubbish at it.
00:43:07Well, it's a good job I don't do yours, I've no idea how to fly a spaceship or punch anyone.
00:43:12Or axe.
00:43:13That can be taught, I got taught that, that was...
00:43:15What, how to punch?
00:43:16Yeah, Hollywood foo, it was great fun.
00:43:18Do you punch like, do you punch with that side of your hand?
00:43:22What are you doing?
00:43:23When you punch?
00:43:24You're not trying to wipe a windscreen.
00:43:26No, no, when you punch somebody, I've often, you sometimes...
00:43:30Well, normally, you know, you, you are quite, you're quite tight and it's all from the waist,
00:43:33but you have to set it a bit more for a camera so you arc it round a bit.
00:43:35But why don't you just end up punching somebody in the middle?
00:43:38Should you try a fake punch?
00:43:40What if it turns into a real one?
00:43:42Well, I'll give, I'll give and you receive.
00:43:44I like being the dominant one.
00:43:49Um, so where's I get, there's a camera.
00:43:50That one?
00:43:51Facing me would be good.
00:43:52You're actually directing now, right?
00:43:53Facing you, I'm ready, am I ready for this punch?
00:43:56Yeah, yeah, when I get to about there, you can move your head fast.
00:43:58But what if I don't?
00:44:01I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna do that.
00:44:02Is anybody there, your dry cleaning bills when my nose just busts?
00:44:06Right.
00:44:07You ready?
00:44:08Yes.
00:44:08Ready, okay, and...
00:44:09Ooh!
00:44:11Is that a guy?
00:44:13He knows, he knows.
00:44:18Um, we've had many actors on the show over the years sitting there,
00:44:21but we've never had one who's been carjacked before.
00:44:24Oh really?
00:44:25That's good.
00:44:26It is, but you were genuinely carjacked.
00:44:29I was genuinely carjacked, yeah.
00:44:30That was, that was not my most pleasant road trip.
00:44:32Um, it was very scary.
00:44:34Um, I mean, I have to emphasize not just because I love South Africa and South Africans,
00:44:38but it, it was a small event in a very big country and we were very lucky.
00:44:41Uh, we were on a sort of bumpy dirt track and then got onto the end too,
00:44:44the major, major sort of trunk road down the east coast.
00:44:47Yeah.
00:44:48And front right tyre blew and, uh, these guys surrounded us.
00:44:52Stuff went on with belongings and, uh, we were pushed about a bit.
00:44:55I was put in the booze of a car though at one point and, um, that was interesting.
00:44:59I thought, oh, maybe I could, uh, maybe I could diffuse the brake lights and then a policeman,
00:45:03no, no policeman is up.
00:45:05Got to put over a car full of men at midnight, you know, to, uh, to question a broken tail light.
00:45:10But it was, it was very scary and, uh, you know.
00:45:12And when they got you, got you out again, did they not put a mattress, no, duvet over your head?
00:45:16At one point, the stuff was being thrown out of the car.
00:45:18We were in this, we were underneath this underpass and, uh, these juggernauts were just charging
00:45:23over and the sound cover would, would be sort of perfect for, you know, a quiet pop.
00:45:27Then this duvet got thrown out, which just went over our head.
00:45:29And I thought, again, it's, it's the pillow thing.
00:45:31It's just, it's going to be a muffler for a gunshot.
00:45:33So, you know, you could, I kind of came to terms with mortality and dying on my own about four times
00:45:38in the space of half an hour. And the whole thing went on for about two hours.
00:45:42But we mustn't put people off Southern Africa.
00:45:44No, we mustn't. It's a big, beautiful place.
00:45:46It is. So we could just ignore all, it doesn't really happen.
00:45:47Yeah, cut it, cut that.
00:45:50Anyway, so, you came down here to do your lap.
00:45:52Oh, s**t.
00:45:55And how was it out there?
00:45:56It was really good fun. I mean, the first couple of laps, I couldn't see the wood for the trees.
00:45:59But then as it went on, I think I got, I, I, I bettered my times later on.
00:46:03So I was obviously learning something.
00:46:04How do you know?
00:46:05People would go, hmm.
00:46:07Oh, just from people's mood.
00:46:09I'm told you did more laps than any guest we've had down here.
00:46:12Oh, that's so shaming.
00:46:14Who'd like to see the fastest lap?
00:46:18Have a look then. Let's have a look.
00:46:22Oh, yes.
00:46:25We are away.
00:46:27Yippee-yi-yay, mother f*****.
00:46:29It's a fan of the hangover is here.
00:46:34Look at it grip the mighty tech line with a lifetime warranty.
00:46:40That's not bad.
00:46:40Is that right?
00:46:41Yeah, that'd be good.
00:46:43It is hot in here.
00:46:45That's no excuse, come on.
00:46:46Did you have the air conditioning off?
00:46:48No, off, off.
00:46:49Off, good man.
00:46:50Really trying, a bit wide through there, maybe cost you half a second.
00:46:53Gear change, gear change, gear change, gear change, so.
00:46:55Yeah, like the Sundance kid there, very quick mover.
00:47:02Oh, God.
00:47:04A bit slow, but at least not skidding about.
00:47:07Yeah, I haven't really used all the track or indeed any of it.
00:47:10Anyway.
00:47:10Use the track, Benedict.
00:47:13Ladies and gentlemen, Alec Guinness in the reasonably priced car.
00:47:20Move those, that was well done.
00:47:22And now here it is, second to last corner.
00:47:24Holy crap, this is scary.
00:47:26No, that is pretty much perfect.
00:47:28Is it?
00:47:28That really is perfect.
00:47:30Gambon.
00:47:31Oh, fast.
00:47:32Oh, fast, but not Jimmy Carlton across the line.
00:47:35Ah, not bad, that is all right, that is all right.
00:47:45These are the times we have so far in our new reasonably priced car.
00:47:49Oh, crikey.
00:47:50Where do we think?
00:47:52I don't know, I don't know, maybe faster than Warwick.
00:47:54I'd be happy, I'd be happy with that.
00:47:55Faster than Warwick at 1.46.8, that's where you're aiming.
00:47:59I don't know, it's very high, isn't it?
00:48:01Benedict Cumberbatch, you are leaning forwards.
00:48:06Won't make my time faster, will it?
00:48:08I haven't got much space left on here.
00:48:11Then shorten the time.
00:48:14You did it in 1.40.
00:48:247.8.
00:48:28So you're not fast.
00:48:29It's all done.
00:48:29But if you didn't know, that's all right, that's okay.
00:48:35I can live with that.
00:48:36It's in the middle.
00:48:39What I've got here is a list of all the other people who've appeared on Star Trek.
00:48:44Makes you feel any better.
00:48:45Jean-Luc Picard, 1.50, dead.
00:48:48Oh dear.
00:48:49So you're faster than he was.
00:48:51But the previous baddie in the last film, Eric Banner, won 47.5 and that was in the wet.
00:48:58So Eric Banner is faster.
00:48:59I can't really find any comfort at all for you.
00:49:01I've just got to come back.
00:49:02You've got to invite me back.
00:49:03I've basically brought you down here and ruined your day.
00:49:07Well, I do apologise for that because it has been an enormous pleasure having you.
00:49:10Likewise, thank you.
00:49:11Best of luck with the new Sherlock.
00:49:13Absolute joy.
00:49:13Ladies and gentlemen, Benedict Cumberbatch.
00:49:15Thanks, Eric.
00:49:16Now, tonight we are heading for Madrid in three convertible supercars.
00:49:31And so far, we've found Spain to be full of brand new things that nobody seems to be using.
00:49:36Absolutely.
00:49:37We spent the night in an unwanted house where Jeremy had cooked his dinner.
00:49:43Anyway, we rejoin the action the following morning.
00:49:46After a hectic night on the lavatory, we headed off.
00:49:56But after just a hundred yards...
00:50:00Oh, I've ruined my Ferrari.
00:50:03Aye, it's a bollard.
00:50:06Luckily, though, my colleagues didn't make a big deal of it.
00:50:10Hammond, look out for that signpost dead ahead of you.
00:50:12Hammond, careful.
00:50:13Block of flats on the right.
00:50:16Please kill me.
00:50:19Breaking a Ferrari is an especially bad thing.
00:50:23So it's like kicking a rabbit.
00:50:26Hammond, when we get on the motorway, you'll be driving quite fast, maybe 70 miles an hour.
00:50:31You'll really need to concentrate there.
00:50:33Hammond, move right, mind the arm take.
00:50:42They're never going to give up.
00:50:46Sure enough, the abuse kept on coming.
00:50:49Two big metal pillars, Hammond.
00:50:52Don't you see the...
00:50:53Don't mind that.
00:50:54That way.
00:50:54You're all right.
00:50:59Happily, after several uneventful miles on yet another empty motorway, we were finally approaching Madrid.
00:51:06I know capital cities often escape the worst of austerity times like these, so hopefully that'll still be a busy old place.
00:51:16But...
00:51:18However...
00:51:22Holy God, look at it, there are thousands of them, this crash was clearly bigger than
00:51:48ever I realised. Still, look on the upside, there's no one for having to run over. And
00:51:59that thought gave me yet another brilliant idea. Nobody is driving on that road. So, what
00:52:09are you suggesting? Or that road. What I'm saying is, we turn this town into a street
00:52:15circuit, ship the Stig out, he sets a time in a car of some sort, and we try and match
00:52:22him. That's an ambitious plan. Well, how hard can it be? A few tyres, bits of barrier. That's
00:52:28an excellent grandstand, all the residents, if there were any, could sit on those balconies
00:52:33and watch. Bernie Eccleston will now be leaning forward in his chair going, good idea. This
00:52:38is the Madrid Grand Prix, coming up. Having sorted out a course, James and I set about
00:52:46making it into an actual track. I can't do the regular if you're going that fast.
00:52:53What's up, Hill? Yeah. Keep going. How are you? This is Ferrari Rosso. So, when you crash
00:53:03into it, this will effectively repair the damage you've done to your car. Because of my problem
00:53:10with manual labour, I went off to collect the Stig.
00:53:20So, this is the start, yeah? Careful. So, this one goes... Now, James, just do them when
00:53:29I'm getting the... No! That's... What the bloody hell? Oops. Ah! He's here. The Stig's here. Is he
00:53:43all right? With the circuit complete and christened, we unwrapped the Stig so he could set a benchmark
00:53:54time in a supercharged Jaguar convertible. Right, are you ready with the stopwatch, James
00:54:02May? Yes, I am. Bradley Cooper, we'll start him. Three, two, one. That's a dirty, dirty sound.
00:54:13Oh, look at that. He's got his tail out going round the rockery of Gibraltar. Because this
00:54:28was a street circuit, it was lined with wheel-killing curbs. And there was even a speed hump. But
00:54:38these things were of no moment to the Stig.
00:54:45Whoa! See the bounce! 57 and a half seconds. Right.
00:54:59We then set off on a sighting lap, knowing that if we wanted to beat the stake, we'd have
00:55:05to average at least 60 miles an hour. That is alarming there. Even though our cars were faster
00:55:14than the Jag, it looked like a tall order. Okay, here we go. This is it. You and me, little Ferrari.
00:55:24Now's our chance. Give it everything we've got. Three, two, one.
00:55:34Really fast stop.
00:55:36Oh, yeah.
00:55:37On the limiter. Round the rockery of Gibraltar.
00:55:39Turn it. This thing will grip, Richard.
00:55:43Oh, yeah. Lift that leg. Back on the pass as you can.
00:55:51Third, that was quick. Now the chicane. This is monstrous.
00:55:58Oh, lift that leg, back on the pass as soon as you can, third, that was quick, now the
00:56:11chicane, this is monstrous, then he's ready through, that is time, and now the
00:56:28final straight up towards the finish line, this is all I've got, everything I can, boom, little
00:56:38Fezzer, I really hope I've made up for crashing you this morning, with my work done, it was
00:56:51Mr. Slowly's turn, three, two, one, oh, it sounds second, third, James May, ladies and gentlemen,
00:57:05hit third, there's a left-hander somewhere, there it is, throw it in,
00:57:15into Lord Howard of Effingham, oh, a tricky gear change with the gear, with, with, no one
00:57:34expect the Spanish speed hump, nice and straight, nearly bloody killed me, finally, it was the
00:57:55turn of the McLaren, active aero in sport, well this is it, three, two, one, whoa, that was
00:58:10launch control, concentrate, Jeremy, concentrate, oh no, massive tail slide there,
00:58:25and on to the Golden Heinz straight, 91 miles an hour there, down to second,
00:58:55oh, power!
00:59:00pole of the
00:59:04hole of the
00:59:09hole of the
00:59:13I have to say,
00:59:15Our street circuit was a million times better than Spain's other one in Valencia.
00:59:21That's the most boring street circuit in the world.
00:59:24The only problem I had was, you know the Lord Howard of Effingham chicane?
00:59:27Yes.
00:59:27He really wanted first, but I couldn't ever get it in the McLaren.
00:59:30He'd go, mm-mm-mm, trying to jam it down.
00:59:32But the problem I had was when you get to the no-one-expects-the-Spanish speed hump,
00:59:35you had to go wide and try and hit it reasonably square,
00:59:38because if you got it at an angle, you'd be banged into the curve.
00:59:40I know, but then it would smash your wheel off.
00:59:41Yes, absolutely.
00:59:43Yes, anyway, I have the results here.
00:59:46And, well, there's no other way to put this than the fastest car around our magnificent track was the Ferrari.
00:59:55Yeah, it was.
00:59:56It wasn't?
00:59:57Well, no, it was, because if you look, there's the numbers next to the names.
01:00:01The one next to mine is the smallest.
01:00:02That means it was the first.
01:00:03No, no, Hammond, the Ferrari was the fastest in the first lap.
01:00:07Well, it was a one-lap event.
01:00:09It wasn't a one-lap event.
01:00:11No, because then we'd pass all the cameras away, okay,
01:00:14and then we kept going, as you remember,
01:00:16and by the end, the McLaren was not just faster than the Ferrari,
01:00:20but faster than the Stig.
01:00:22Yes, but that wasn't the end,
01:00:23because then the Stig went out again in the Jag and was faster than the McLaren.
01:00:27Well, yes.
01:00:28Hang on, that wasn't the end either,
01:00:29because if you remember, it then started raining,
01:00:31and in the rain, the Audi was the fastest because of its four-wheel drive.
01:00:35So, this isn't very good, is it?
01:00:38Well, it's not very clear.
01:00:39No, it is.
01:00:40What we're saying is that various different points,
01:00:42all of them were the fastest.
01:00:44Yeah.
01:00:44Yeah, anyway, look, I've got the results of everything over here,
01:00:47all the categories,
01:00:48and speed, yes, we've decided that was a dead heat for all three.
01:00:52Well, no, because, I mean, on the night, it was the Ferrari.
01:00:54It wasn't the Ferrari.
01:00:55It was the McLaren.
01:00:56It was the McLaren.
01:00:56Will you two shut up?
01:00:58Quietness, that was also a dead heat between the Audi and the McLaren.
01:01:06Discretion, the Audi.
01:01:08Economy, that was the Audi.
01:01:11Value, was the Audi.
01:01:13But, finally, equipment, that was the Audi.
01:01:18Clear, isn't it?
01:01:20Fairly comprehensive win there for the Audi.
01:01:22So, James May, of the three cars, knowing what we know now,
01:01:26which would you choose to buy?
01:01:28The Ferrari.
01:01:31Yeah, it's the Ferrari.
01:01:33And you?
01:01:34Ah, McLaren.
01:01:35Interesting, really?
01:01:36No, I'd love the Ferrari.
01:01:38Good job.
01:01:39I mean, the McLaren is absolutely brilliant,
01:01:41but the Ferrari's just a little bit more special.
01:01:44So, what we're finally saying is we'd all three have a car
01:01:47that dissolves if you drive it too quickly.
01:01:51Yes.
01:01:52Yeah.
01:01:53But on that bombshell, we can end.
01:01:55Thank you very much for watching.
01:01:57See you all again next week.
01:01:59Take care.
01:01:59Good night.
01:02:05Top Gear's Great African Adventure is now available to own
01:02:08on BBC DVD and Blu-ray.
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