- 2 days ago
Jeremy, Richard, and James travel to Burma (Myanmar) to build a functional bridge across the River Kwai using modified trucks, launching one of the most ambitious Top Gear challenges. Back home, Jeremy tests the formidable Caterham Seven 620R. Aaron Paul joins as the celebrity guest.
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Top Gear Season 21, Top Gear S21E05, Top Gear Burma Special Part 1, Top Gear Myanmar bridge, River Kwai challenge, Caterham Seven 620R, Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, James May, Aaron Paul Top Gear, Top Gear BBC specials
Follow our channel for more car crazed mayhem. Alot more episodes to come that you don't want to miss. Like our videos and share with other car lovers!!
Thank you for supporting our channel
Top Gear Season 21, Top Gear S21E05, Top Gear Burma Special Part 1, Top Gear Myanmar bridge, River Kwai challenge, Caterham Seven 620R, Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, James May, Aaron Paul Top Gear, Top Gear BBC specials
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MotorTranscript
00:00:00Tonight, Richard opens a glove box, James pulls a face, and I ask an important question.
00:00:18Have you ever put toothpaste on your testicles?
00:00:20Thank you. Hello. Good evening. Thank you very much, everybody.
00:00:32That is a big crowd tonight. Thanks very much. Thank you.
00:00:35Now, last year, the big three German car makers, Mercedes, Volkswagen, and BMW, all brought out new hot hatchbacks.
00:00:46And since this is a top consumer programme full of helpful buying advice, I thought it would be a good idea to see which one of them is best.
00:01:02Well, not the Mercedes, that's for sure.
00:01:06This is the new four-wheel drive A45, and it's extremely powerful, extremely nice to drive, and handsome as well.
00:01:16But it is ridiculously expensive.
00:01:22This car, with a few options on it, is £46,000, and that, for a hatchback, is... it's idiotic.
00:01:30It's like charging £100 for a sardine.
00:01:33Oh, it's a very good sardine, sir. I don't care how good it is. I'm not paying £100 for a fish.
00:01:37If, then, you have even half a droplet of common sense, you'll be choosing between these two.
00:01:46The BMW M135 and Volkswagen's latest Golf GTI.
00:01:52Both cost around £30,000.
00:01:57Both are available with three or five doors.
00:02:02Both come as standard with many things.
00:02:06And both will be as reliable and as long-lasting as Edinburgh Castle.
00:02:12You might think, then, that they're pretty similar, but they're not.
00:02:15Which is why I am in the BMW.
00:02:19You see, the Golf has a two-litre, four-cylinder, turbocharged engine, and that's very nice.
00:02:25But the BMW has a three-litre, six-cylinder turbocharged engine.
00:02:31And that's even nicer.
00:02:33Yes, the Golf is lighter.
00:02:41But that is not enough to offset a 90-horsepower disadvantage.
00:02:47A point I shall now demonstrate with a small race.
00:02:51Front-wheel drive Golf is clinging on jolly well, but frankly, it's pointless.
00:03:08I can overtake any time I like.
00:03:12I have the power.
00:03:15And I have an eight-speed gearbox compared to his paltry six.
00:03:21Yes, the Prussian aristocrat is trampling all over the London people's car.
00:03:34Here we go.
00:03:35Power!
00:03:36Come on!
00:03:40And there we are, in front.
00:03:44The BMW, then, really is very fast.
00:03:47What's more, because this is the first hot hatchback for 30 years to have rear-wheel drive, you can do this.
00:03:58So far, then, the BMW is running rings round the Golf.
00:04:12But I then lined them up for a simple straight-line drag race.
00:04:20And there was a problem.
00:04:23A big one.
00:04:25Three...
00:04:26Two...
00:04:27One...
00:04:28One...
00:04:38Good noise!
00:04:44With this in reverse.
00:04:45At this point, I was feeling confident.
00:04:52But, as I hit 120 miles an hour...
00:04:55This really is a...
00:04:56Oh, f***ing...
00:04:57F***ing...
00:05:16Yeah, you see, the Golf won that, because this...
00:05:19Well, it lost control.
00:05:21That's what happened there.
00:05:24Woof!
00:05:27After this incident, I switched to the Golf GTI.
00:05:33And I decided immediately, it was a lot better in every single way.
00:05:38Not only was it able to travel in a straight line without spinning off...
00:05:42But, thanks to its smaller engine, it's a lot more economical than the BMW.
00:05:48And a lot cheaper to insure.
00:05:49In fact, because Volkswagen has fitted this with a forward-facing radar system...
00:05:54That won't let you have a low-speed crash...
00:05:58This GTI is in an insurance group five down from the previous model.
00:06:04And more expensive to insure a pencil sharpener.
00:06:08So, the GTI is cheaper to run and cheaper to buy...
00:06:12And much better in a straight line than the BMW.
00:06:15But what if you want to transport a nuclear warhead?
00:06:20Well, what we've got here in the boot of the Volkswagen is a warhead.
00:06:26And as you can see, it fits perfectly.
00:06:28But, will it fit in the boot of the BMW?
00:06:33Oh, dear.
00:06:35Oh, dearie me.
00:06:37See, this is the problem, really, with rear-wheel drive.
00:06:43It does rob space.
00:06:46So, you'd have to drive along like that.
00:06:49And somebody is going to notice.
00:06:51Hans Blick is for sure.
00:06:53Things are much the same when it comes to space in the cabin.
00:06:57The Golf can handle three people on the back seat easily.
00:07:03But, the only way you're going to get three people in the back of a BMW...
00:07:07...is by sawing their legs off with a hammer.
00:07:10Now, this is not only complicated and messy, but, in Britain at least, it's currently against the law.
00:07:20Come on!
00:07:22The bone!
00:07:28One.
00:07:30It's probably easier to buy the Golf, really.
00:07:33So, the Golf is cheaper to buy and cheaper to run and also more practical than the BMW.
00:07:42It's like driving around in James May's soft draw.
00:07:46Everything is exactly where you'd expect it to be.
00:07:50All organised.
00:07:52Blue ones, brown ones, pink ones, for special occasion.
00:07:56Don't think, however, because it's sensible and practical and economical, that it's in any way boring.
00:08:00Look, the gear leave is a sort of golf ball shape.
00:08:04You see, you Englishes, you have the Monty Python and the Harry and the Paul.
00:08:09But we have a sense of fume also with this.
00:08:12Yeah?
00:08:14There's more as well, because this particular car is fitted with Volkswagen's optional performance pack.
00:08:21That means better brakes, more power, a top speed of 155 miles an hour.
00:08:28And a trick front differential.
00:08:32Now, we've seen clever front differentials before, but nothing like this.
00:08:38My foot is hard down now, coming round Hammerhead.
00:08:42And there's no torque steer, there's no understeer.
00:08:51You can feel the whole car being dragged in, pulled towards the apex.
00:08:58I've never felt anything like it.
00:09:01A baboon could get this around here as fast as the Stig.
00:09:16So, there we are. These two cars are not the same at all.
00:09:19One is brilliant in every way.
00:09:23And the other tried to kill me.
00:09:25And the other tried to kill me.
00:09:29Oh, yeah.
00:09:31Very interesting.
00:09:33Oh, yeah.
00:09:35Really fascinating.
00:09:37Just, um, some questions raised.
00:09:40Let's get this straight.
00:09:42You don't like the BMW because you can't drive in a straight line.
00:09:46Mark, who's talking?
00:09:49How fast did you say you were going?
00:09:54120 miles an hour.
00:09:56Oh, so walking pace, basically.
00:09:58Listen, from the point where it suddenly snapped sideways for no reason,
00:10:03to the point where it stopped moving, we measured it, it was over a quarter of a mile.
00:10:07No, I could have held it, I reckon.
00:10:09Could you?
00:10:10Look, you just aquaplaned.
00:10:11Yes, but the Golf was on the same track in the same conditions and it didn't aquaplane.
00:10:16No, the Golf didn't aquaplane because you weren't driving it.
00:10:21Yes, but, Hammond, all things considered, the Golf is a better car.
00:10:26Is it?
00:10:27It is, honestly.
00:10:29The definite is remarkable.
00:10:30Because you know when you go round a corner in a car, you go like that, yeah?
00:10:33And it wants to push out.
00:10:34Well, in this, the faster you go, it comes in.
00:10:36It's like Volkswagen has worked out a way to reverse centrifugal force.
00:10:41Wow, so Volkswagen have broken science.
00:10:43Yes.
00:10:44With a diff.
00:10:45Yes.
00:10:47And now we must find out how fast these cars go round our track.
00:10:51And that, of course, means handing them over to our tame racing driver.
00:10:55Some say that his hair is the exact same shape as a hat.
00:11:00And that if he worked for CNN, he wouldn't get such pitifully low ratings.
00:11:12But his show got cancelled.
00:11:13All we know is, it's got a stick.
00:11:26And they're off.
00:11:27And for the first time, this series, it's actually dry.
00:11:29Right, first straight, will the BMW suddenly spin off for no reason?
00:11:34Nope, it's actually made it to the first corner.
00:11:37Amazing.
00:11:39Those turbocharged engines loving this crisp, dry air.
00:11:42And no fuss so far.
00:11:43So far.
00:11:48No idea what that was.
00:11:50Right, through Chicago, Golf's traction control can't be completely switched off.
00:11:54You can actually see it nipping at the brakes on the way in.
00:11:58BMW, of course, just being stupid.
00:12:02Hammerheads, no real dramas there either.
00:12:04But the Golf, yes, it's magic differential, casually twisting physics.
00:12:09Right, follow through, and yep, BMW's trying to spin, of course.
00:12:18The Golf has a nibble of traction control, then faithful as a Labrador.
00:12:22Ooh, the Golf brake lights flickering there.
00:12:24That's the traction control turning him on, not Stig.
00:12:27Who's still fuming, because I said a baboon could drive as fast in the Golf as him.
00:12:32Right, just Gambon left.
00:12:34More hooliganism from the Beamer, and across the line.
00:12:36That's the line.
00:12:40I have the times here.
00:12:41Come on, man.
00:12:43The BMW.
00:12:45The BMW went around in 1.25.1.
00:12:50So, it's slower than the old version, which did it on a damp track.
00:12:55So that's useless.
00:12:57And the Golf GTI did a 1.28.6. Look at that.
00:13:00Oh, that's a lot slower.
00:13:01Yes, yes, yes.
00:13:02But, look, Astra, McGann RS, the Focus, it's right where a hot hatchback should be.
00:13:07This is just stupid.
00:13:08This is much better.
00:13:10And now we must do the news.
00:13:11Oh, yes, we must.
00:13:12Which is difficult, because that means walking over there, which is a straight line.
00:13:16You could spin off and lose it.
00:13:19Here he comes, ladies and gentlemen.
00:13:21Will he make it?
00:13:22Conditions are very dry in the studio today.
00:13:24Oh, no.
00:13:25He's only got the steps up.
00:13:26Go.
00:13:27Nice one.
00:13:28Yes, he's done it.
00:13:29Yeah.
00:13:30I thought you were going off.
00:13:32Well, listen.
00:13:33It's tricky straight, that.
00:13:34It was easy, because my shoes were not made by BMW.
00:13:38Really?
00:13:39Good.
00:13:40Don't do the news, ladies and gentlemen.
00:13:42Now, last week you saw Richard Hammond driving a six-wheeled Mercedes-Benz.
00:13:47But did you know they made another six-wheeled car long before that one?
00:13:51Would you like to see a picture of it?
00:13:52I have to.
00:13:53Here it is.
00:13:54Oh, right.
00:13:56Did they not mention this, then?
00:13:57Do you know they didn't?
00:13:58How old?
00:13:59It is, isn't it?
00:14:00Because Mercedes like to go on about their heritage and history, and they didn't mention that one.
00:14:04Well, perhaps they didn't mention it because it's got Hitler in it.
00:14:07I don't know.
00:14:08That's not Hitler.
00:14:09It is.
00:14:10It isn't.
00:14:11No, that car was built long before indicators were invented, so he's just there to do some
00:14:16hand signals.
00:14:17What signals is he doing there, then, James?
00:14:19He's saying, take the Third Reich.
00:14:23Ow.
00:14:24Try the chicken.
00:14:30Now, have we got any Scottish people here?
00:14:34Yes.
00:14:35Would you like to just step outside just for the next few minutes?
00:14:38Please.
00:14:39We've got a bit of a chat.
00:14:40It's about Scottish independence.
00:14:41It's just there.
00:14:42We've heard a lot of talk in recent weeks about what Scotland would lose if you choose to go
00:14:46on your own, but nobody's talking about what England would lose, and it is actually quite
00:14:50a lot, because we'd lose North Sea Oil, the sub base at Fast Lane, all tramps.
00:14:56Oh, God.
00:14:57And we'd also lose a significant chunk of our motor in heritage, and I'm not talking now
00:15:05about the Hillmans and Talbots that were made at the Linwood plant just outside Paisley.
00:15:09No, I'm talking about stuff like the mighty Argyle.
00:15:13Scotland's finest.
00:15:14Wow.
00:15:16Look at that masterpiece.
00:15:18Do you know, do you know, when that car came out, it was the same price as a Ferrari
00:15:23308, and hardly anybody bought one.
00:15:25Really?
00:15:26It is remarkable, because you look at that, well, plastic body, and you know, and you
00:15:30just look at the way the door fits.
00:15:32That is a quality product.
00:15:33Isn't it?
00:15:34Oh, yeah.
00:15:35What engine did it have?
00:15:36Ah, well, no, it's interesting.
00:15:38Engine-wise, you could have either an engine from a Lancia, a Peugeot, a Renault, you could
00:15:45have a Buick V6.
00:15:46Basically, it was whatever turned up in the scrapyard that week.
00:15:49Basically, yeah.
00:15:50Well, actually, you could also have it with the option of a turbocharged Rover V8.
00:15:57And guess how many of those they sold?
00:15:59Was it none?
00:16:00Yes, it was none, wasn't it?
00:16:02Absolutely none at all.
00:16:03And I have to say, it wasn't just supercars where Scotland was ahead of the game.
00:16:08They were ahead of the curve also with electric cars, because way back in the day, they made
00:16:12a little car called the Scamp.
00:16:13I've got a picture of it here.
00:16:14Oh, wow.
00:16:17Great Scott.
00:16:18That still has the power to take your breath away, even today.
00:16:21It does.
00:16:22It does, isn't it?
00:16:23Just.
00:16:24It's a rather tragic story, though.
00:16:27It was made of aluminium and wood, and it was going to be sold through electricity board
00:16:31showrooms, which I remember, actually.
00:16:33But when they took it to the government test centre to get a roadworthiness certificate
00:16:37before they could put it on sale, there was a bit of a problem.
00:16:40In one test, the government engineer noted, and I've written all the problems here down,
00:16:46the speedo broke, the electric motor stopped working, the back door flew open, the spare
00:16:51wheel fell out, the steering went wrong, and then the suspension snapped.
00:16:57And that was the end of that.
00:16:59Aww.
00:17:00And yet it looked so full of promise, didn't it there?
00:17:03Now, I drove my Mercedes down to the track this morning, and genuinely the most extraordinary
00:17:09thing happened.
00:17:10It didn't catch fire.
00:17:12Now, James, you came down in your Fiat Panda, did you not?
00:17:17Yes.
00:17:18Did that catch fire?
00:17:19Let me just think.
00:17:20No.
00:17:21Did it not?
00:17:22No, it's not.
00:17:23Richard, the higher car you came down in.
00:17:24Yes.
00:17:25Did that burst into flames?
00:17:26No, it didn't.
00:17:27Did it not?
00:17:28No.
00:17:29Why are you in a higher car?
00:17:30Because Porsche have told me I'm not allowed to drive my brand new GT3 and they've taken
00:17:35it off me.
00:17:36It's because, as we mentioned briefly last week, Porsche GT3s have been bursting into
00:17:41flames, and now Porsche have told you you can't drive it anymore.
00:17:44Yes, it is, and you both know full well that it is.
00:17:46Well, that means you have no use of those oven gloves, which I can see down there, which
00:17:49I bought you last week.
00:17:50Yeah, my Porsche driving gloves.
00:17:52Have they taken it away?
00:17:53Yes, they've taken it off me.
00:17:55So you don't need those, but it's okay, Hammond, because I have got you another present.
00:18:00Oh, good, have you?
00:18:01No, Hammond, it's a 911 tailored specifically for you.
00:18:05Is it?
00:18:06Yes, here it is.
00:18:07Look at that.
00:18:08Oh, you are literally the most amusing man in the whole world.
00:18:14He is.
00:18:15Even up.
00:18:16Oh, no!
00:18:17Look.
00:18:18Oh, God, no!
00:18:19I've got an oven glove, which is out as fast as possible.
00:18:24It's all right, I...
00:18:26I hate you.
00:18:30Right, now, um, yes, as we know, a great many people in the country are now starting
00:18:40to use one of these to move about.
00:18:42Now, this is called a bicycle.
00:18:44And you can tell just by looking at it that it is very dangerous.
00:18:48And as a result, a lot of people are being hurt in cycle-related injuries.
00:18:53Now, in the olden days, the government would have addressed this problem by making a public
00:18:57information film.
00:18:58They used to make them about all sorts of things.
00:18:59We had to clunk click every trip, not to go near a railway, not to play near the water.
00:19:04Yep, there was don't run.
00:19:06Yes.
00:19:07They never told us not to run.
00:19:08They did.
00:19:09They did not.
00:19:10They did, and I shall show you.
00:19:11We've got a clip here.
00:19:12Look, what?
00:19:13You never know what's round a corner.
00:19:16So don't run.
00:19:18There you go.
00:19:19Yeah.
00:19:20That's advice I've heeded all my life.
00:19:22Oh, you really took that to heart.
00:19:24You haven't run since, have you?
00:19:25Of course not.
00:19:26There might be a pane of glass coming.
00:19:28Anyway, look, we don't really get these public information films anymore because of budget
00:19:32cuts and so on.
00:19:33So Jeremy and I thought that to help stop cyclists being injured, it might be a good
00:19:38idea to bring them back.
00:19:40So you two are going to make a public information film about cycling?
00:19:44Yes, we are actually.
00:19:46We went to see a panel of experts at London's Westminster Council and they said they'd be
00:19:50delighted if we made a public information film, which would help cut the number of injuries.
00:19:55And this is what I came up with.
00:19:58Here we go.
00:20:03John works hard, which means that he can afford to drive a car.
00:20:24That means he gets home to his family, safely, every night.
00:20:33Daddy's home!
00:20:36Work harder.
00:20:37Get a car.
00:20:39Thank you very much.
00:20:40I think the work of genius, frankly.
00:20:49That is terrible.
00:20:51It isn't.
00:20:52It is.
00:20:53It isn't.
00:20:54It is.
00:20:55No, it is.
00:20:56Which is why I fired him and went and had a go at making a public information film on
00:20:59my own.
00:21:00Having come up with a cracking idea, I appointed myself as director, gathered together a small
00:21:10cast and crew and set to work.
00:21:12The whole point of this is to be with you on the swing and try and look doctorish.
00:21:18That pen isn't very medical, I'm afraid.
00:21:22Action.
00:21:23I love it.
00:21:24Golden.
00:21:25Yeah.
00:21:26First positions.
00:21:27Let's go again.
00:21:28If you could be opposite each other on this three-pronged arrangement, arms out, singing
00:21:33in the rain.
00:21:35Good.
00:21:36And action.
00:21:37Good swinging.
00:21:38Nice.
00:21:39I'm liking this.
00:21:40When my film was finished, Jeremy and I went to Westminster Council to show it to
00:21:53the panel of experts.
00:21:55There was Chris Boardman, Policy Advisor for British Cycling, Martin Lowe, City Transport
00:22:02Commissioner, and Alan Kennedy, Road Safety GB.
00:22:07The good news is we have two films for you to look at.
00:22:11No, we have one.
00:22:12No, two.
00:22:13There's two.
00:22:14Why don't you show them yours first of all, which I believe is that one there.
00:22:20Gentlemen, if you'd like to relax whilst I just insert this in the machine.
00:22:32You stopped playing with children's toys when you grew up.
00:22:44So why ride a bicycle?
00:22:46Oh, I did a skid!
00:22:49Act your age.
00:22:51Get a car.
00:22:53You just haven't got it, have you?
00:22:58What's that?
00:22:59Absolutely crazy.
00:23:00Well, no, I can see you're disappointed just in the way you're looking, James.
00:23:04They're disappointed with your work.
00:23:06May I just play you this one, if I may?
00:23:08Just let me show you this one, because I think this will rectify the problem which has
00:23:11begun already.
00:23:12John works hard, which means that he can afford to drive a car.
00:23:25Work harder.
00:23:26Get a car.
00:23:27Terrible.
00:23:28Absolutely terrible.
00:23:29You just got it wrong.
00:23:30Dreadfully wrong.
00:23:31Where's the cyclist?
00:23:33Well, mangled at the end.
00:23:35What was the brief?
00:23:36Well, we're trying to make cycling safer, and we thought the best way to do that is to
00:23:41stop people cycling.
00:23:42But the message you should be getting across is that people need to be considerate towards
00:23:46each other.
00:23:47I'm not sure they're going to like our poster idea that we had as well, but we came up with
00:23:52that.
00:23:57We did spell it wrong.
00:24:00I think we're going entirely the wrong direction.
00:24:03Entirely the wrong direction.
00:24:04Have you actually spoken to a cyclist?
00:24:06Well, no.
00:24:07Well, maybe that would be a good idea.
00:24:09Or even try it yourself.
00:24:12And so, we put on some cycling clothes and went on a fact-finding trip around London's
00:24:16glittering West End.
00:24:18Come on, Jeremy.
00:24:19I'm behind you.
00:24:20This sounds my battle for pedestrians.
00:24:22Look at him.
00:24:23He's wearing normal clothing, the lunatic.
00:24:24You'll be killed.
00:24:25You'll never make it.
00:24:26Whoa.
00:24:27I nearly hit that bloke in the face.
00:24:40Our mission was to identify the dangers that cyclists face on the city streets.
00:24:46And soon, we spotted one.
00:24:47James, we've got to go right.
00:24:48Right.
00:24:49There's a lot of peril involved in that.
00:24:52Right.
00:24:53Well, be careful, James.
00:24:54There's great peril.
00:24:57So, we came up with a solution.
00:24:59What if we only went left?
00:25:01It's not a bad idea, actually.
00:25:02You can still get where you want to go by going left.
00:25:05So, go left here?
00:25:06Yes.
00:25:07Yeah.
00:25:08There's another little left here we can do.
00:25:11Excellent.
00:25:12Well, I feel perfectly safe.
00:25:15I've been completely safe.
00:25:17No right turns.
00:25:18That's the main thing, the cycling.
00:25:20I reckon it improves your chances of survival by about 85%.
00:25:24Definitely.
00:25:25Oh, hang on.
00:25:26That's...
00:25:27No, I'm not sure that's worked.
00:25:29I've seen Charles Saatchi having lunch five times already.
00:25:33After an hour in the saddle, I discovered another problem for cyclists.
00:25:38Oh, bump.
00:25:39Bump.
00:25:40Really bumpy here.
00:25:42Oh, this is deeply uncomfortable now.
00:25:46Oh!
00:25:50Ow!
00:25:51Ah, I've got to do something about my bottom.
00:25:54This is really uncomfortable.
00:25:58So, we stopped at a bicycle shop where, apparently, you can buy special creams.
00:26:03Are these all to rub onto your bits?
00:26:05Yes.
00:26:06Yes, they are.
00:26:07Is that normal?
00:26:08Yeah.
00:26:09Are women's bottoms different to men's bottoms?
00:26:11I think so.
00:26:12Are they?
00:26:13Yeah.
00:26:14Having selected the correct cream, I went to apply it in the changing room.
00:26:18Oh, what?
00:26:19Yeah.
00:26:20This made everything worse.
00:26:21Oh!
00:26:22Have you ever put toothpaste on your testicles for a joke?
00:26:23Well, to be really honest, yes, I did when I was a teenager.
00:26:24Yes, exactly.
00:26:25So did I.
00:26:26Do you remember the pain?
00:26:27Yeah, I do.
00:26:28Yeah, well.
00:26:29Is that what it's like?
00:26:30Yes.
00:26:31James was very sympathetic.
00:26:32your testicles for a joke well to be really honest yes i did when i was a
00:26:35teenager yes exactly so did i do you remember the pain yeah i do yeah well
00:26:39is that what it's like james was very sympathetic goodness gracious great balls of fun with the
00:26:48pain getting worse i had to make an emergency stop please may i use your lavatories my scrotum
00:26:57is on fire have you ever put toothpaste on your scrotum with my gentleman's area sorted we got
00:27:06back on the road right so the light just went red so that means go when you're on a bicycle and soon
00:27:13we were picking up valuable information taxi driver very polite thank you very much sir another taxi
00:27:21extremely polite thank you yeah look at that you see he politely let me go thank you i've been riding
00:27:32now for three hours and not a single car driver has done anything annoying you'd imagine that cycling
00:27:40around hyde park corner which is what i'm doing now would be as dangerous as juggling chainsaws but
00:27:46if you keep your eyes open and you're courteous it's fine every car's given me six foot berth
00:27:56taxis vans yeah all the cars and vans have been very decent i haven't seen a complaint but there
00:28:02was one type of road user who wasn't courteous at all look at this idiot
00:28:07oh god a buff so that bus just overtook me so i have to now go on the wrong side of the road
00:28:19and you get that and now he's just set off see and i'm stuck on the wrong side of the road
00:28:26these are the problem i've decided the buses because all of the drivers think they are literally lord
00:28:34oh my god almighty
00:28:39bloody murder now they're giving me a wide berth oh the bus is going to kill me you're going to kill
00:28:46me keep going keep going that means a homicidal maniac and another one ah
00:28:56no don't do that why do they put bicycles in the bus lane whoa
00:29:04and then just to round things off oh no no no no no no no no what are you doing look the chains come
00:29:16off sorry i know there's nothing much i can do is there over here why can't they build a machine
00:29:24where the chain stays on you've got that derailleum miles out of adjustment i don't know what you're
00:29:29talking about what is a derailleum it's the thing that moves the chain across you've bent it so the
00:29:34gearbox on this is broken well we'll have to sell it and buy another one after james had mended my
00:29:40geranium he gave me a stern lecture bicycle makes it the reason people have accidents on bicycles is
00:29:46because of things like the brakes not working worn out wheel bearings bad those out of adjustment
00:29:51that out of adjustment this not time you know that's it's really easy bicycle majors you need
00:29:55about three spanners and a screwdriver with the fact finding mission over we felt we'd become
00:30:04fully paid up members of the cycling community
00:30:10have you got the arts pages
00:30:21it seems to me for our public information film what we should do
00:30:27is make cycling attractive to bus passengers because then there'd be no need for buses
00:30:35and they're the biggest problem on the road not just for cyclists but also for the cars cars as well
00:30:41so if we get rid of buses remove the demand for buses we get an extra lane everybody wins
00:30:49a few days later we cycled to the top gear office to discuss some new ideas for our important public
00:30:57information film i think what that does is it dissuades people from using the bus yeah but it isn't
00:31:05true it is it isn't it is i went on a bus once and i got an eye infection oh some people get diphtheria
00:31:12or rickets or scurvy it's nonsense it's not going to work i then showed jeremy something i'd put together
00:31:20hello cyclists i'm here today to talk to you about bicycle maintenance let's start with the most
00:31:27important part of a bike you simply rotate this adjuster until the brake blocks are almost in contact
00:31:32with the wheel lock it with the nut and then the chain and the sprockets will grind together make
00:31:42sure there is no play in the steering head bearings if there is if you can feel a little
00:31:48how much more is there of this well quite a lot but you know how long is this 58 minutes
00:31:55what a 58 minute thing well it's more of a public information documentary if i'm honest
00:32:03annoyingly james's other ideas were even worse action
00:32:13why is he dressed up as hitler because cyclists need to be visible christ on a bike
00:32:24james you can't do that yes i can as he brought out a cross i left him alone and went off to work
00:32:32on my own one of the problems i discovered on my fact-finding bike ride around london
00:32:37is that pedestrians simply don't hear bicycles coming they step off the curb the cyclist has
00:32:43to swerve into the path of a bus blood artery gush burst court case murder disaster
00:32:51bicycles therefore need to be louder
00:33:02what i've done is attached to the back of this bike a jet engine
00:33:09and now pedestrians can definitely hear me coming and so can other motorists and people in
00:33:16subterranean caves in other countries even the profoundly death when no one was on my way they
00:33:26they feel a disturbance in the force
00:33:31of course another advantage is you don't have to do any of that annoying peddling
00:33:36again my genius is staggering me it really is oh dear i'm out of fuel
00:33:47i've run out of fuel that's what's happened now damn
00:33:57think of it really as a hybrid there we go
00:34:01for the rest of the day we tried all sorts of other ideas here you go
00:34:17well what's it supposed to be it's a cyclist after an accident
00:34:21i couldn't use an actual cyclist could i so for example the double mini roundabout okay
00:34:28so you come round here then it's your right of way going up here but action
00:34:39after a great deal of extremely hard work we ended up with a couple of films that we could take
00:34:44to our panel of experts before we show them to me let me just do you remember the early public
00:34:50information films from oh yeah and they always picked on some very specific detail so it was don't put a
00:34:56rug on a polished floor or don't fish under power lines they were very tight and so we've tried to
00:35:02focus on very specific details of cycling that we experience um we hope that uh this one first yes i think that's okay
00:35:13the green wire for god's sake do not cut the red wire it is imperative to cut the green wire
00:35:31cyclists red and green learn the bloody difference
00:35:36well i mean i'm not sure we're really getting anywhere here what are you trying to achieve with
00:35:45that cyclists jump red lights we know this everybody's seen that it's what annoys people
00:35:51most about bicycles this is making the roads a happier place because cyclists wait like they're
00:35:56supposed to car drivers aren't infuriated and cyclists don't get knocked off or indeed blown up
00:36:02you didn't listen to what we said did you you said we had to make the roads a more harmonious place
00:36:07exploding are you really trying to really get that message they're really trying to waste our time
00:36:11today because you know that is way off well you want them to jump red lights no we don't want the
00:36:16jump i'm talking about that that commercial it's absolutely wrong okay well let's try yes yes please
00:36:23that this this may be more to your taste then i think i have a dream that all men are created
00:36:33dr martin luther king was shot and killed on the balcony of his motel in memphis imagine there's no
00:36:42heaven the former beetle john lennon has been shot and killed in new york
00:36:46it's easy if you try the righteousness of jesus christ jesus died on the cross for our sins
00:37:04so this is a no isn't it
00:37:14and with that it was back to the studio
00:37:17so
00:37:28you two completely cocked it up
00:37:30do you know i don't know what was wrong with my jet bike
00:37:34well it was a motor on a bicycle and therefore it was a motorcycle it wasn't a motorcycle it was superb
00:37:42how fast did it go at one point i was clocked at 73 miles an hour yeah that does sound like the top
00:37:48speed of a motorbike he's right you know like isn't right he isn't and anyway listen eventually we did
00:37:54come up with a film which we think will keep that panel of experts happy uh because in essence it makes
00:38:02everybody happy and gooey with everybody else here we go let's have a watch cyclists get wet cold and tired
00:38:13they turn up for work with revolting armpits their clothes are hideous and to prevent boils and sores
00:38:21they have to put gel on their buttocks however because three quarters of a million people are
00:38:28prepared to go through this misery every day there are fewer traffic jams the roads are quieter which
00:38:36is good news for normal people
00:38:39cyclists give them an inch because they've given you a mile
00:38:56an inch they need six feet no hammer it's a figure of speech you idiot i couldn't say you
00:39:02know give them 1.85 meters that's just the fact is we have solved cycling if people weren't watching
00:39:10call the midwife on the other side tonight there would be no more cycling related accidents so you're
00:39:16saying watching call the midwife is now socially irresponsible yes it is and it's morally wrong
00:39:24anyway now it is time to put a start in our reasonably priced car and we're going to do something
00:39:29incredible because for the next few minutes we're going to stop your teenage daughter from texting
00:39:35and that's because my guest tonight played jesse pinkman in breaking bad
00:39:42stops already ladies and gentlemen aaron paul
00:39:49he's here how are you what's up buddy how are you i'm good i'm good how are you doing hi
00:40:00i love them yeah this is a big noise have a seat all right have a seat it is strange to have on a
00:40:08guest from a show that was never on british tv yeah who's now in a film that isn't even out yet
00:40:15yeah everybody's screaming and yelling i love you all i love you all yeah let's do the film if we may
00:40:23it's need for speed i need for speed yeah it's a story of uh toby marshall guy i play um he spends a
00:40:31couple years in prison for something that he did not do so the moment he gets out of prison
00:40:37it's just he's trying to right a wrong vengeance is on his mind so he has to try and get from the
00:40:42the east coast to the west coast in less than 48 hours in a car a very fast car and what sort of car
00:40:47uh it's a shelby mustang shelby mustang yeah well it can be quite fast nice straight lines yeah
00:40:55so it sounds like he's got top gear written all over it yeah he wanted to do a throwback or director
00:41:00to um films that really kind of started this genre like bullet and vanishing point and smoking the
00:41:07bandit and back then you know they couldn't rely on cg they couldn't rely on green screen and so
00:41:13um everything that you see in this movie actually happened there was there's no cg no cg whatsoever yeah
00:41:19seriously yeah well let's have a look at a clip and you'll see why i'm looking incredulous here we go
00:41:25they took everything from me
00:41:27all those who defied me shall be ashamed and disgraced those who wage war against me shall perish
00:41:51perish i will find strength
00:41:58find guidance and i will triumph
00:42:05you
00:42:12you
00:42:18yeah it's uh it gets pretty violent so a cool exact really did do a role they actually did those yeah
00:42:25i presume these are body shells they're not actual no no no no million dollar cars yeah we don't want
00:42:31to i mean we consider those cars kind of you know a piece of art and so but the uh the kit cars that
00:42:36they built were about three hundred thousand dollars a piece and they just destroyed them that is
00:42:41unbelievable but forgive me i've got to get onto breaking bad yes thank you i know this there's quite
00:42:49a few puzzle faces going what is what is breaking what is breaking bad okay this is jesse pigman as far
00:42:55as far as i'm concerned i'm now talking to the world's greatest crystal meth salesman yes yes for
00:43:02those of you who don't know it was about a chemistry teacher who who meets a delinquent uh who an ex-pucal
00:43:08and he's got this guy's been diagnosed with cancer and then he thinks to pay for my treatment i'll start
00:43:12making crystal meth because i'm a chemistry teacher and the series runs from now do you honestly we don't
00:43:17really have crystal meth in this country that's great what is crystal do you know what it is no not
00:43:23really no no i've been making it for the past six years and i have no idea what it is no it's just
00:43:28uh it's just a terrible awful drunk it just grabs a hold of some people and just doesn't let go do
00:43:33you know what i loved about the show is the detailing in it uh-huh and the cars you all drove yeah there
00:43:38are they're incredible who chose those that was all um vince gilligan he's the creator of the show i
00:43:45mean his attention to detail is just incredible i mean he there's this famous conversation he had uh for two
00:43:51hours um about the certain color of red nail polish that was going to go on skylar's toenails well he
00:43:58was going to get the cars right because walter who is the chemist chemistry teacher has a pontiac aztec
00:44:03yes never been sold here but it was probably the worst car it's just such a sad car look at that it's
00:44:12just so sad it's a sign that your life has gone terribly terribly wrong oh it was interesting with
00:44:20you because you started out with a chevy monte carlo wasn't it uh yes when you were a delinquent
00:44:25but this became more and more successful switch to the toyota tercel now look at that i actually
00:44:31wanted that car so bad when we wrapped were you going to keep it no they they uh they didn't allow
00:44:37me to take it why not it's worth 32 dollars now that says it's shocking but it is that attention to
00:44:44detail which i absolutely adore i really did um now more questions about breaking bad which
00:44:50fascinating about american television because yeah we know that u.s networks they're brutal i mean one
00:44:56minute you know you've got a you've got a chat show um who's talking about did you know piers morgan oh yeah
00:45:09yeah that's i had a feeling you were talking about but what i was going really is you've got these
00:45:14u.s networks presumably breaking bad was only ever going to be one series i mean they would only
00:45:19commission one wouldn't they see how it works yeah every network uh passed on breaking bad initially
00:45:25um uh hbo showtime i mean everyone and then amc decided to give it a shot yeah with one series with
00:45:31one pilot and then they had to see how that was how it turned out um i mean we were lucky that we even
00:45:38stayed on the air because our our ratings weren't that great but um the critics loved us so yeah it
00:45:44was very clever absolutely brilliant thank you now your cars in real life not a toyota to sell you
00:45:50know that though with a toyota i did i started out uh with an 82 toyota corolla yeah it was beautiful
00:45:59faded gold um anytime it rained the trunk would fill up with water uh stick shift but i i love that cars
00:46:07then i bought a a toyota forerunner uh it's getting worse and then i i bought an old classic car okay
00:46:16which is a 65 shelby cobra really oh you could have just no you see the the shelby cobra oh yeah there it
00:46:27is that is that that's you that's you in it that's that's my car yeah i only take it you know it's like
00:46:32my weekend car take it along the coast but if you're driving in a in a parking lot it just sets
00:46:38off the alarms oh i love doing that it's great fantastic they're absolutely fabulous so they were
00:46:44my daughter's gonna be mental now because that's her favorite car and it's her favorite actor driving
00:46:48it i love your daughter yeah no you don't um right now obviously you came down here this is this is
00:46:59bullsy i've got to say because you have done need for speed and you've come down here today to do your
00:47:03lap which is quite brave yeah let's see how i did i mean i don't know it was fun shall we have a look
00:47:10at the lap oh god here we go wow that's a brutal start all right i just don't want to get last
00:47:20setting high goals for myself not to get last no it's okay because for the first time ever this year the
00:47:30weather is good that thing does grip well there we go yeah okay it's okay yeah come on tongue out
00:47:44yep that's a very good line around there thank you very nice the dreaded hammer head i hate this turn
00:47:55okay okay that is heavy breaking you were giving it there yeah you know oh that is very very neat and tidy
00:48:05come on you
00:48:10bitch we knew it no way were you gonna get around a lap without saying that
00:48:21oh the comfortable line missing the uh missing the apex
00:48:26second to last corner this catches ball that was absolutely bob on now gambon
00:48:32again kissing everything perfectly across the line
00:48:40well well now
00:48:44these are the wet tie you're not going to be lost because you know chat why or bless him
00:48:48he'd never driven before so you're not going to be lower than him okay good so where do you think you
00:48:54came i have no idea i want to be above james blunt uh james blunt was 149.4
00:49:00that is fw stands for flipping wet so you're definitely going to be above him so come on be
00:49:06reasonable i mean i would like to be you know towards the top but i i do but that's the 145 region
00:49:12yeah i mean i don't know that well do you know i was just about to say well jesse pinkman but i won't
00:49:16get out aaron paul 1 40
00:49:274
00:49:30Oh! That's the best you've ever had!
00:49:34Number one!
00:49:36Yes!
00:49:38The hand!
00:49:40Good man!
00:49:42The fastest man ever to take the Astro win in the try!
00:49:46Ladies and gentlemen, Aaron Paul!
00:49:54Now, that's going to take some beating.
00:49:58This is the £650,000 Porsche 918.
00:50:03It is insanely fast.
00:50:05It's rammed full of technology,
00:50:07and most importantly, it is a hybrid.
00:50:10In many ways, then, exactly the same as the McLaren P1
00:50:13that Jeremy fell in love with a few weeks back.
00:50:16The big question, though, is it any good?
00:50:20No!
00:50:28When Jeremy tested the P1, he took it to the Spa racetrack in Belgium.
00:50:33My F1 track may not have that pedigree,
00:50:37but at this place, at least the fun doesn't stop when the sun goes down.
00:50:43I've been thinking, the big unfortunately.
00:50:45I've been thinking, the big thing for me,
00:50:46the big thing for me is going to be when I'm thinking of it.
00:50:48I'm thinking, the best way can I go into the shop now?
00:50:49I'm thinking, the best way can I go into it?
00:50:50I'm thinking that it will do the best way to keep it moving forward.
00:50:52Do we have to keep it in the shop now?
00:50:54And this point is the absolute plan of the game,
00:50:55the other way?
00:50:56I'm thinking the best way to go in the House of B1 time.
00:50:57And this point is where we are all throughout the game.
00:50:59What about his own prepayment game?
00:51:00The name of the game?
00:51:01I'm thinking, the best way to be a very good guy who had it,
00:51:03is the best way to think that there is a play that this time.
00:51:04The Abu Dhabi circuit is also famed for having a 1.2-kilometre straight, one of the longest
00:51:20anywhere. Seems like a good place to start. Let's make some noise.
00:51:25Oh, that is breathtaking.
00:51:34Oh, ha, ha, ha. 9,000 RPM. Boom!
00:51:49Ah, big speed. 280. Braking. Oh, that is acceleration unlike anything else. I know Jeremy's head
00:52:05was blown off by the speed of that P1, but I absolutely cannot believe it felt any faster
00:52:11than this. It can't have done. Like the McLaren, the 918 has a joint strike force of petrol
00:52:23engine and electric motors working together. It's that electric power that gives it so much
00:52:31punch off the line. I have 500 foot-pounds of torque at 800 RPM. 800! A 458 doesn't have
00:52:41500 torques at any RPM. It just wakes up. It's like a sprinter falling out of bed and going
00:52:48straight into a world record while all the others are still eating cornflakes and thinking
00:52:51about having a poo. The petrol engine, which sounds ungodly through those top-mounted exhausts,
00:52:58is a 612 horsepower, 4.6-litre V8. On the topic of power and performance, the 918 and the
00:53:13P1 can trade punches all day long. The 918 can't match the P1's top speed, 218 compared to 211.
00:53:27But I get to 60 quicker. 2.6 seconds to his sluggish 2.8. I've got 875 brake horsepower,
00:53:37the P1 has 903, but I've got more torque. And on and on and on it goes. It's King Kong versus Godzilla.
00:53:48There are some areas, though, where the 918 definitely has the P1 on the ropes. It can retrieve energy generated by braking and feed it back into the batteries. The roof lifts out so you can enjoy some open-top cruising.
00:54:04And inside you get some actual creature comforts like electric seats and an 11 speaker sound system. You don't get either of those on a P1.
00:54:16I'm not one to gloat, but hello, glove box, yeah. And then this centre console from where I can control the top screen, that does many things up there.
00:54:26And then over 800 functions can be controlled from the touch-sensitive screen down here. Maybe I can go online and order Jeremy a set of spanners to adjust the seat on his P1.
00:54:36Look up old-fashioned for me.
00:54:52In addition to the wealth of onboard amusements, the 918 also has many drive-in modes.
00:55:00Right now I'm in fully electric mode.
00:55:07And I can whisper around like this for 18 miles compared to the P1's 7.
00:55:14But if I go down here I can select hybrid.
00:55:18And that allows it to alternate between petrol and electric in the most efficient way.
00:55:24Or we've got sport mode where we have petrol power all the time.
00:55:29But, you know, I'm here on this racetrack so let's go one further.
00:55:34Put it in race mode.
00:55:36Now the petrol engine is topped up and the electric motors are acting as its wing.
00:55:45It's time to attack some corners.
00:55:48It's time to attack some corners.
00:55:52It's time to attack some corners.
00:55:53It's time to attack some corners, yılanien.
00:55:54And you've got a little
00:56:18And there's no of that bottom-clenching terror Jeremy talked about in the P1.
00:56:28Partly, that's because where the P1 is rear-drive only,
00:56:32the 918 has four-wheel drive and four-wheel steering.
00:56:40I think, in essence, yes, the P1 is more proper fighter pilot, seat-of-the-pants stuff.
00:56:46This is altogether more civilised, but that does not mean it's boring, because it just isn't.
00:56:56The back end breaks away like a rear-wheel-drive car.
00:57:05What a thing!
00:57:07But even though the 918 is more grown-up than the P1, it can still boast some pretty exciting achievements.
00:57:21The fact is, this car has lapped the Nürburgring in 6 minutes 57 seconds.
00:57:28That's faster than any other road-legal production car.
00:57:33To put it into context, a hardcore Lexus LFA did it in 7 minutes 14 seconds.
00:57:39The mighty Nissan GT-R was almost half a minute slower.
00:57:42As for the P1, well, McLaren are saying it has gone round in under 7 minutes.
00:57:49But they're not saying an actual time.
00:57:52I don't know. Maybe they lost the piece of paper it was written on.
00:57:56Or something.
00:57:57With daylight coming, I locked up, left the keys to the circuit under the mat, and went in search of breakfast.
00:58:18Full of awe for this incredible machine.
00:58:30Here I am with 875 bhp, a 4.6-litre V8 that sounds like that.
00:58:38And yet the CO2 emissions are lower than a Toyota Prius.
00:58:43Certainly much lower than a P1.
00:58:44I don't know, this is just all round a more impressive achievement.
00:58:50It's more of its time.
00:58:52To put it another way, McLaren have used hybrid technology to liven up a supercar today.
00:58:59Porsche have used hybrid technology to save the supercar for tomorrow.
00:59:05This is an important car.
00:59:07Oh yeah. Here it is.
00:59:18I don't know, you didn't catch fire.
00:59:20Shut up.
00:59:21Never mind that.
00:59:22Now listen, Hammond, in that film, you said there's none of the bottom-clenching terror when you're driving this that you get in a McLaren P1.
00:59:31How do you know? You haven't driven a McLaren P1.
00:59:34I know that because after you had driven the McLaren P1, you said it was a day of bottom-clenching terror.
00:59:39I did a bit, but I was driving in the pouring rain at Spa. You were at Abu Dhabi, bone-dry and with eight-mile run-offs on all the corners.
00:59:50Look, fact is, the 918 can handle its power better.
00:59:54Its dribble of power?
00:59:55Well, it's barely got enough to get out of its own way.
00:59:58And how do you know that because you haven't driven the Porsche?
01:00:01Because Porsche won't let me.
01:00:02Yes, because they know, Jennifer, you can't drive in a straight line. We've seen it.
01:00:07At least I didn't write a book about it.
01:00:09Look.
01:00:11Enough, enough, enough. Let me interrupt with the solution to all this.
01:00:14Because later on in the year, hopefully, we're going to make a special Top Gear programme.
01:00:19One in which Richard and Jennifer bring the Porsche 918 and the McLaren P1 down to our track and we will see which is the fastest.
01:00:28Should be quite good, actually, that.
01:00:29Hopefully, we'll be able to put it together June, July sometime around there.
01:00:33And it'll basically be England versus Germany.
01:00:36But, before then, in fact, starting next weekend, we have our all-new two-part Top Gear Christmas special.
01:00:45Yeah, it is a bit late. We're sorry.
01:00:47It's an Easter special.
01:00:49It's an Easter special.
01:00:51The three of us are told to build a bridge over the River Kwai.
01:00:54But first, we have to get there.
01:00:58And that means driving all the way across Burma in lorries that we bought from the internet unseen for a few hundred quid.
01:01:08And on that Burma shell...
01:01:11There it is.
01:01:12Time to land. Thank you so much for watching.
01:01:15Good night.
01:01:16There's drama in the den.
01:01:23A cuddly travel companion that all the dragons are fighting over next.
01:01:27And over on BBC One now, Arames goes out of his way to protect a young mother and her baby son.
01:01:32Original British drama, The Musketeers.
01:01:34The Musketeers.
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