- hace 5 meses
Irritated by the new obsession with all things French, Blackadder makes a bet with Lords Topper and Smedley and goes out to rescue an aristocrat and claim his 1,000 guineas.
Blackadder apuesta 1.000 guineas a que será capaz de viajar hasta Francia y rescartar a un aristócrata del reinado del Terror, emulando a Pimpinela Escarlata.
Blackadder apuesta 1.000 guineas a que será capaz de viajar hasta Francia y rescartar a un aristócrata del reinado del Terror, emulando a Pimpinela Escarlata.
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00:00Thank you!
00:30Thank you!
01:00Thank you!
01:30Thank you!
02:00Thank you!
02:02Thank you!
02:08Oh sir, poor little Mildred the cat.
02:10What's he ever done to you?
02:12It's the way of the world, Balric, the abused always kick downwards.
02:14I'm annoyed and so I kick the cat, the cat...
02:18...pounces on the mouse...
02:20...and finally the mouse...
02:22...bites you on the behind.
02:24What will I do?
02:26Nothing, you are last in God's great change.
02:28And of course there is an eirgazo that you like to victimize.
02:33What do you do with your nose?
02:34No, no, no. No, no. No, no. No, no.
02:37No, no. No, no. No, no.
02:39Oh, no, no.
02:41Why don't you pay for the fake bag?
02:44What do we expect from the next one?
02:46To the beauty of light?
02:48To veruca cosmetics?
02:51It's a pimple brush, sir.
02:53But?
02:54Yes, all the time in the rose.
02:56Everyone wants to express their admiration for the great pimple and his brilliant offerings.
03:01We're still here, we're still there, we French are still there.
03:06Is he in the or in the?
03:08And what is that?
03:11What has this man done?
03:14Apart from going to France,
03:16to record a few French people of French people
03:19of the malnuchas, leftist struggles,
03:22taking the opportunity while there, no doubt,
03:24to pick up some really good cheap wine
03:26and some of their marvelous open fruit flans.
03:29Does anyone know?
03:30We hate the French.
03:31We fight wars against them.
03:32Did all those men die in vain on the field of Agincourt?
03:35Was the man who burned Joan of Arc
03:37simply wasting good matches?
03:42Ah, His Royal Highness the Pinhead of Wales, somebody.
03:45You know, I feel almost well disposed towards him this morning.
03:48Act a chump though he may be,
03:49at least he's not French.
03:52A toast, encore a toast, I say.
03:55The Scarlet Pimpernel.
03:58The Scarlet Pimpernel.
04:01Ah, Le Hader Noir, come over with.
04:08This is a fellow to ask you, chaps.
04:10My butler, terribly clever.
04:11Brighter than a brain pie.
04:14Our Blackadder,
04:15we're trying to guess who the Scarlet Pimpernel is
04:17so we can send him an enormous post lauder
04:19to express our admiration.
04:21Any ideas?
04:22Well, I'm sure if you address the envelope to the biggest show-off in London,
04:25it would reach him eventually.
04:27Pish and pish.
04:28Dead zooks.
04:29Malarky.
04:30How dare you say such a thing?
04:31Damn me, sir, if you're not the worst kind of swine.
04:35Damn that swine.
04:37I'm sorry, sir.
04:38I was merely pointing out that sneaking aristocrats out from under the noses of French revolutionaries
04:42It's about as difficult as putting on a hat.
04:45Think me, sir.
04:46This is treason.
04:47A Scarlet Pimpernel's a hero,
04:49and the revolution is orchestrated by a ruthless band of highly organized killers.
04:53Damn them.
04:54Damn those organized killers.
04:56George, if I remember correctly, we were just discussing the French Embassy Ball in honor of the exiled aristocracy.
05:04We certainly were.
05:05Where I intend to wear the most magnificent pair of trousers ever to issue forth from the delicate hands of Messrs Snipcock and Turkey,
05:13couturier to the very wealthy and the extremely fat.
05:16If the Pimpernel does finally reveal himself, I don't want to get caught out wearing boring trousers.
05:20Save those boring trousers.
05:23Well, what say we bet your cock-shaw domestic a thousand guineas he can't go to France,
05:30rescue an aristocrat, and present him at the ball?
05:34Ha!
05:35That's turned you white, hasn't it?
05:37That's frightened you, you lily-livered, caramel-keepneyed, custard-colored can.
05:42Not so buoyant now, are you? Hey? Hey? Hey?
05:46On the contrary, sir, I'll just go and pack.
05:49Oh.
05:50Perhaps Lord Smedley and Lord Topper will accompany me.
05:53I'm sure it will be a fairly easy trip, the odd death-defying leap and a modest amount of dental torture.
06:00Oh no!
06:01Oh no!
06:02Damn!
06:03Damn!
06:04Any day now, I've got an appointment of my doctor.
06:09I've got a bit of a sniffle coming on. I can feel it in my bones.
06:13Dim bones, dim bones, dim.
06:15What about next week?
06:17Oh, come on, you chaps, get your diaries out, come on.
06:20All right.
06:21Damn!
06:22Dem!
06:23I've left him behind.
06:24And I've decided, I've just remembered, my father's just died.
06:28I've got to beat his funeral in ten minutes.
06:30Dem, sorry, goodbye, your highness.
06:33Er, dem.
06:35I'm the best man.
06:37Dem!
06:38Dem, father, dem.
06:40Bye-bye.
06:41See you at the ball.
06:42Oh, what a shame they were so busy.
06:46It would have been lovely to have them with us.
06:49Us?
06:50Forks.
06:51You're coming, sir?
06:52Oh, certainly.
06:53Ah.
06:54And nothing I can say about the mind-bending horrors of the revolution could put you off?
06:59Oh, absolutely not.
07:00Now, come on, Blackadder, let's get packing.
07:02I want to look my best for those fabulous French birds.
07:05Sir, the type of women currently favored in France are toothless crones who just cackle insanely.
07:12Ignore that.
07:13They're just playing hard to get.
07:16By removing all their teeth, they go mad and age 40 years.
07:20That's right, the little teasers.
07:22Now, come on.
07:23Um, I think a blend of silks and satins.
07:26I fear not, sir.
07:27If we are to stand any chance of survival in France, we must have to dress as the smelliest lowlife imaginable.
07:33Oh, yes?
07:34What do you think?
07:35Well, sir, let me show you our Paris collection.
07:38Baldrick is wearing a sheep's bladder jacket with matching dungball accessories.
07:45Hair by Crazy Meg of bedlam hair.
07:48Notice how the overpowering aroma of rotting pilchards has been cunningly woven into the ensemble.
07:55Baldrick, when did you last change your trousers?
07:58I have never changed my pants.
08:00Thank you.
08:01You see, the ancient Greek, sir, wrote in legend of a terrible container in which all the evils of the world were trapped.
08:07How prophetic they were.
08:08All they got wrong was the name.
08:10They called it Pandora's box, when, of course, they meant Baldrick's Trouse.
08:15They certainly can get a bit whiffy, there's no doubt.
08:18We are told that when the box was opened, the whole world turned to darkness because of Pandora's fatal curiosity.
08:26I charge you now, Baldrick, for the good of all mankind, never allow curiosity to lead you to open your trousers.
08:34And nothing of interest lies therein.
08:37However, Your Highness, it is trousers exactly like these that you will have to wear if we are to pass safely into France.
08:43Yes, well, you know, on second thoughts, I think I might give this whole thing to miss. You know, my tummy's playing up a bit.
08:50I wish, wish I could come, but just not pass with this tongue.
08:53I understand perfectly, sir.
08:55Also, the chances of me scoring if I look and smell like him are zero.
08:59Well, that's true, sir. We shall return presently to bid you farewell.
09:03Mr. B, I've been having second thoughts about this trip to France.
09:07No, why?
09:08Well, as far as I can see, looking and smelling like this, there's not much chance of scoring me either.
09:16Well, Blackadder, this is it.
09:18Yes, sir.
09:19If I don't make it back, please write to my mother and tell her that I've been alive all the time.
09:24It's just that I couldn't be bothered to get in touch with the old woman.
09:27Well, of course, old man. It's the very least I can do.
09:30We must leave at once. The shadow's lentil and we have a long and arduous journey ahead of us.
09:35Farewell, dear master and, dare I say, friend.
09:39Farewell, brave liberator and, dare I say it, butler.
09:49Right, stick the kettle on, Balders.
09:51Well, aren't we going to France?
09:53Of course we're not going to France. It's incredibly dangerous, though.
09:56Well, how are you going to win your bet?
09:58As always, Baldrick, by the use of the large thing between my ears.
10:03Hold your nose.
10:07No, Baldrick, my brain.
10:08All we do is lie low here for a week, then go to Mrs. Miggins's, pick up any old French aristocrat, drag him through a puddle, take him to the ball and claim our thousand guineas.
10:19But what if the prince finds us here?
10:21He couldn't find his own fly buttons, let alone the kitchen door.
10:26What a pair of trousers!
10:31I shall be the belle of the embassy bull.
10:34Now, how do you put them on?
10:35Back up!
10:37Oh, no, damn, he's gone to France.
10:39Well, I'll do it myself. Shouldn't be too difficult.
10:40Um...
10:42Uh...
10:47Well, Baldrick, what a very pleasant week.
10:50We must do this more often.
10:52Yes, I shall certainly choose revolutionary France for my holiday again next year.
10:58Well, time to go to work.
11:00Off to Mrs. Miggins's to pick up any old French toff.
11:06What do you think that is?
11:08Well, if I was feeling malicious, I would say it was the prince still trying to put his trousers on after a week.
11:18Ah, Mrs. Miggins, I'd like a massive plate of pig's trotters, frog's legs and snail's ears, please.
11:24All drained in your lovely scarlet pimpernel willow.
11:28Not so hostile to the Frenchies now, Mr. B.
11:31Certainly not, Mrs. M. I'd sooner be hostile to my own servant.
11:34In fact, I came here specifically to meet lovely Frenchies.
11:39Well, live to that and an eclair for both of us.
11:44Live indeed. Now, what I'm looking for, Mrs. M., is a particular kind of Frenchie.
11:48Namely one who is transparently of noble blood, but also short on cash.
11:52Oh, well, I've got just the fellow for you, over there by the window.
11:56The Comte de Froufrou.
11:59Ah, he's pretty down on his luck.
12:01He has made that horse's willy last all morning.
12:04We have struck garlic.
12:09Now, you can have some lunch, Warwick.
12:14Thank you.
12:16Le Comte de Froufrou, I believe.
12:20Hey?
12:22Do you speak English?
12:23A little.
12:25Forks. When you say a little, what exactly do you mean?
12:27I mean, can we talk, or are we going to spend the rest of the afternoon asking each other the way to the beach in very loud voices?
12:32Oh no. I can order coffee, deal with whiters, make sexy chit-chat with girls, that kind of thing.
12:40Oh, good.
12:41Just don't ask me to take a physiology class or direct a light opera.
12:44No, no, I won't.
12:46Now, listen, Froufrou.
12:47Would you like to earn some money?
12:51No, I wouldn't.
12:53I would like other people to earn it and then give it to me.
12:56Just like in France in the good old days.
12:58Yes, but this is a chance to return to the good old days.
13:01Oh, how I would love that.
13:04I hate this life.
13:05The food is filthy.
13:07This huge sausage is very suspicious.
13:11If I didn't know better, I'd say it was a hostage.
13:14Yes, yes, yes, sir.
13:16The plan is this.
13:17I have a bet on with someone that I can get a Frenchman out of Paris.
13:21I want you to be that Frenchman.
13:23All you have to do is come to the embassy with me, say that I rescued you, and then walk away with 50 guineas and all the volvos you can stuff in your pockets.
13:32What do you say?
13:34It will be a pleasure.
13:37If there's one thing we aristocrats enjoy, it's a fabulous party.
13:41All the music, all the laughter.
13:45If only I'd brought my mongoose costume.
13:48Yes, well, obviously, it hasn't really got going yet.
13:57I think that's a bit of an understatement, Frou-Frou. I've been at autopsies with more party artists.
14:02Don't worry. In a moment, we will hear the sound of music and happy laughter.
14:07Good evening, Monsieur. Good evening, my man. Do you speak English?
14:18Little.
14:19Good. Well, just take me to the ambassador, then, will you?
14:22Pardon?
14:24I have rescued an aristocrat from the clutches of the evil revolutionaries.
14:32Please take me to the ambassador.
14:34No, I won't.
14:38I am an evil revolutionary and have murdered the ambassador and have turned him into pate.
14:51Ah.
14:52And you, Aristopig, are trapped. Pig! Ha!
14:56You will regret your insolence, revolutionary, Doug.
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