- 5 weeks ago
Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond and James May travel across the world to meet different automobile manufacturers and drive cars made by them.
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LifestyleTranscript
00:00:00Oh, no!
00:01:00Thank you so much and welcome to the Grand Tour, which this week comes to you from the United Arab Emirates.
00:01:22Specifically, we are in Dubai, which means for the first time ever, we are the three poorest people in the tent.
00:01:39Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:01:40I mean, look at that.
00:01:41You think, how do they do that with all those fountains?
00:01:44Well, I'll let you into a little secret.
00:01:46It's Perrier water.
00:01:49Leaning it up into the air.
00:01:51I heard another one the other day.
00:01:53Okay, a taxi driver clearing out his cab after a hard day at work, umbrella, mobile phone, usual stuff.
00:01:59£800,000 gold bar.
00:02:02Someone had left it in there and not even noticed.
00:02:06You would.
00:02:07Mind you, that said, here, you can just go to an ATM and get gold out.
00:02:11Look at this.
00:02:12That's an actual ATM.
00:02:14Because you know when it's like two o'clock in the morning, oh, no, I haven't got an ingot with me.
00:02:17But here, you're fine.
00:02:19You can even buy tyres here, okay, which are studded with gold and diamonds.
00:02:25Look at this.
00:02:26£600,000 a set.
00:02:29Even the authorities are loaded.
00:02:31We have here a selection of pictures of local police cars.
00:02:34They have an Aventador.
00:02:35They also have an SLS.
00:02:38Yeah, wait for it.
00:02:39They even have a Veyron police car.
00:02:42Oh, yeah, obviously.
00:02:44They actually do.
00:02:45You need that.
00:02:46It's important.
00:02:46I've even got a photograph of a local ambulance.
00:02:49Look, here it is.
00:02:52Not quite sure how that works.
00:02:54Presumably, you have to break the patient's other leg to actually get him in there.
00:02:59Yeah.
00:03:00Then there's public transport.
00:03:01Now, okay, in the UK, this is a bus, yes?
00:03:04Yeah.
00:03:04Let me show you a photograph of a local bus here.
00:03:07There you go.
00:03:10Top speed, 155 miles an hour.
00:03:12Costs £7 million.
00:03:14Seats 23 people.
00:03:15You telephone the owner, and then he comes and picks you up and takes you to where you
00:03:19want to go.
00:03:20That's a taxi.
00:03:22No, James.
00:03:23No, no, no.
00:03:24A taxi in Dubai looks like this.
00:03:27All right, yeah, of course.
00:03:28You think I'm joking, look.
00:03:30Uber.
00:03:31Seriously, you call Uber up here, and you're given a choice.
00:03:35Prius or helicopter.
00:03:36Wow.
00:03:37Do you get to rate the driver?
00:03:38Do you think he sticks his telephone on the screen like they do in Britain in The Price?
00:03:43I'm not really a pilot.
00:03:44I'm just doing this while I'm training to be a plumber.
00:03:46No, no, get out.
00:03:47Just get out.
00:03:48Should we get on with the show?
00:03:49Yes, good idea, because in our car show this week...
00:03:53James falls over.
00:03:56Ow!
00:03:58James falls over again.
00:04:03And James falls over.
00:04:06But first, there's been a bit of an argument.
00:04:10You see, James and I both recently bought five-door German hatchbacks.
00:04:16His is a BMW i3, which is powered by electricity,
00:04:20and mine is a conventional Volkswagen Golf GTI.
00:04:24Yes, meaning my car is from the future, and his is from the past,
00:04:29making me enlightened and him a dinosaur.
00:04:32They have been arguing like this for a while now.
00:04:35The thing is, I don't doubt that in the future electric cars will work,
00:04:40but they don't work now.
00:04:41Well, they do.
00:04:42They don't, James.
00:04:43Well, why did you fit yours with a petrol-powered range extender?
00:04:47Well, that's just a little generator that keeps the battery topped up
00:04:50if I need it.
00:04:52What you're saying is you can't rely on new technology,
00:04:54and your seats, they're made from the contents of a Hoover bag.
00:04:58Oh, says the man...
00:04:59LAUGHTER
00:04:59Says the man whose seats are made from Jackie Stewart's old trousers.
00:05:03Because they are.
00:05:05It's whatever!
00:05:06The fact is, in the office, we decided we'd had enough of them
00:05:09bickering and told them to go out and do a proper road test.
00:05:13So we did.
00:05:15We began in London with a real-world test that Clarkson had thought of.
00:05:20Right, James, we must now see who can open their back door
00:05:23in the shortest time.
00:05:25Why?
00:05:25Well, it could be an emergency.
00:05:26People will want to know.
00:05:28Ready, steady, go!
00:05:29Our mind's open!
00:05:31Oh, dear, have you got to open your front door before you open...
00:05:34Yes!
00:05:34...that meant, to be honest, a flap.
00:05:36It's not a flap.
00:05:37It is a flap.
00:05:38A BMW's saying that in the future,
00:05:40children will only be three inches wide.
00:05:42What are you talking about?
00:05:43For a start, it's hardly a hardship,
00:05:44and that's an enormous space.
00:05:46You only wanted to do that test because you made a mistake.
00:05:48He made a mistake.
00:05:49I didn't.
00:05:50What mistake?
00:05:51You did.
00:05:51You wanted a three-door Golf,
00:05:53and you didn't fill the form in properly.
00:05:54I know that.
00:05:55But...
00:05:55You can't tick boxes.
00:05:57Five doors are better looking.
00:05:58No, they're not.
00:05:59Nobody ever wanted a five-door Golf GTI.
00:06:01We've got to get on now.
00:06:02It's really naff.
00:06:02We've got to talk about money.
00:06:03He also wanted a red one.
00:06:05He didn't fill that bit in properly, either.
00:06:14This car, with many, many optional extras,
00:06:19was £36,000,
00:06:21whereas James May's BMW i3 was...
00:06:25Well, let's find out, shall we?
00:06:27How much was your i3?
00:06:30Well, it was £40,000,
00:06:32but I got £5,000 back from the government.
00:06:35So, actually, it's £35,000,
00:06:36which is less than yours, I think.
00:06:38You were given by the government
00:06:40£5,000 of taxpayers' money
00:06:44so you could buy that car.
00:06:47I didn't make the rules.
00:06:48You can't turn it down.
00:06:49It's not like the Beatles' OBE.
00:06:51That is obscene.
00:06:53I mean, James May is a wealthy man,
00:06:55but that bus driver has bought his car for him.
00:06:59Where's the justice in that?
00:07:03You're paying for his car.
00:07:04Do you know that?
00:07:06You have paid for it.
00:07:07Just so you know, you paid for his car.
00:07:10Has James May thanked you for buying his car for him?
00:07:14Jeremy will have an opinion on this,
00:07:15despite having bought a farm
00:07:17on which, for many years,
00:07:19he was paid to not grow anything.
00:07:23Congestion charge here.
00:07:24It's £11.50 to drive into the centre.
00:07:26Not for me, it isn't.
00:07:28Of course it isn't.
00:07:29Taxi driver here,
00:07:30is he paying for your congestion charge?
00:07:32I suppose everybody must pay a little bit.
00:07:35James May, James May,
00:07:37stealing from the rich.
00:07:38James May, James May,
00:07:40stealing from the poor.
00:07:42He steals from the rich.
00:07:44He steals from the poor.
00:07:46And once more,
00:07:47once it's all,
00:07:48that's appalling.
00:07:51It nearly works.
00:07:54I'd had enough of this,
00:07:56so I came up with a new way
00:07:57of trying to prove my car was better than his.
00:08:04James, can I just ask,
00:08:05why have you brought me to London Airport?
00:08:08Because I want to prove that my car is faster than yours.
00:08:12It's funny,
00:08:13because I just heard you say
00:08:14that your car is faster than mine.
00:08:16Yeah, it is.
00:08:18167 horsepower.
00:08:19Mm-hmm.
00:08:20Mine has the performance pack,
00:08:21so it produces 227.
00:08:24Does it?
00:08:24Yes.
00:08:25That's the official figure, is it?
00:08:26Yes, it is.
00:08:27From VW.
00:08:28Yes.
00:08:28And you believe them?
00:08:30Yes.
00:08:30All right.
00:08:32Listen, I know what you mean.
00:08:34Drag race,
00:08:34nought to 150.
00:08:36No.
00:08:38Having not agreed on that,
00:08:40we then failed to agree
00:08:42on where the finishing line should be.
00:08:44James wanted a short race,
00:08:47and Arnie didn't.
00:08:51Compromise.
00:08:52Isn't that too short?
00:08:53It's not.
00:08:54It's exactly right.
00:08:55But eventually,
00:08:56we were ready to go.
00:09:03Now, the thing to remember, viewers,
00:09:04is that an electric motor
00:09:06delivers enormous torque from nothing,
00:09:09from really low down,
00:09:10so over a short distance,
00:09:11I should absolutely cream this.
00:09:14Here we go.
00:09:14DCC, normal.
00:09:17Steering, normal.
00:09:19Drive, eco.
00:09:22No point ruining my own car to win this.
00:09:25No need to rush.
00:09:47I'm winning.
00:09:49Oh, yes.
00:09:53I'm still winning.
00:09:55Let's go get him.
00:09:56Come on, Golfie.
00:09:58No.
00:09:59No.
00:10:00Quite sprightly,
00:10:02but not sprightly enough,
00:10:04methinks.
00:10:05See you, James.
00:10:15Bah!
00:10:16I've made the future look rubbish
00:10:17on the television.
00:10:19And then,
00:10:20to make it look even worse,
00:10:22I told the Benefit scrounger
00:10:24that we were setting off for Devon.
00:10:27Why are we going to Devon?
00:10:29Because we have two tickets tonight
00:10:32to see Roger Daltrey,
00:10:33out of the Who,
00:10:35perform at a pub on Dartmoor.
00:10:38Couldn't we just wait for him
00:10:39to come and maybe perform in London?
00:10:41Because I'm sure he will.
00:10:43Well, no, because it's a 200-mile drive, thereabouts.
00:10:46It'll give us an opportunity
00:10:48to see how our cars work in the real world.
00:10:50What he means is,
00:10:51it's an opportunity for him to claim
00:10:53that the car of the past is superior.
00:10:57To prove it wasn't,
00:10:58I needed to top up the charge I'd lost
00:11:00by doing the drag race.
00:11:02Right, I look at settings on my sat-nav.
00:11:06I can look at where all the charging
00:11:08and petrol stations are.
00:11:10I can even tell what sort of charging point
00:11:12I am being offered,
00:11:14whether or not I have the right card for it.
00:11:18And soon,
00:11:19we found exactly what I was looking for.
00:11:21It's the future.
00:11:34Oh, that's such a shame.
00:11:36Shut up.
00:11:38Because I didn't have enough juice
00:11:40in the batteries to make the next charge point,
00:11:42I had to turn on my petrol generator,
00:11:45which stopped them going even flatter,
00:11:47and engage Eco Pro Plus driving mode.
00:11:51It does mean I have to do 56 miles an hour.
00:11:55That's where Eco Pro Plus
00:11:57sets the maximum speed,
00:11:59because that way you get the maximum range.
00:12:01But it means I'm effectively a lorry driver.
00:12:04Because I'm in Eco Pro,
00:12:05I don't get any air conditioning
00:12:06or climate control at all,
00:12:08because that wastes electricity.
00:12:10So the car is slowly steaming up.
00:12:13It's now warning me.
00:12:14It says, find a charge station, you idiot.
00:12:18How many screws do you have to have loose
00:12:20before you say yes?
00:12:22I'm going to buy a car
00:12:24which, when it's running low on power,
00:12:26has to be driven at eight miles an hour,
00:12:28with the air conditioning off
00:12:30and the lights off
00:12:31and the heater off
00:12:32and the radio off.
00:12:34Why would you do that?
00:12:37After several lifetimes
00:12:39of driving in convoy with James,
00:12:41we finally found a charge point that worked.
00:12:47That's it.
00:12:48It's done?
00:12:49Yes.
00:12:50You don't have to stand and watch it.
00:12:51It's not like petrol.
00:12:52We can go off and have a cup of coffee,
00:12:54a sticky bun.
00:12:55How is it going to take?
00:12:57An hour or so.
00:12:57An hour?
00:12:58Yeah.
00:12:59What much does it cost
00:13:00to fill it up?
00:13:02Nothing.
00:13:05What?
00:13:06Well, so it's free.
00:13:07How could it be free?
00:13:08Well, it's free.
00:13:09You have to get the card,
00:13:10but it doesn't cost anything.
00:13:11How much does the card cost?
00:13:12Nothing.
00:13:13You just have to fill a form in on the internet
00:13:15and it comes in the post.
00:13:16So I'm paying for your fuel,
00:13:18well, your electricity as well?
00:13:19Probably.
00:13:20I'm just staggered by this.
00:13:22It's iniquitous.
00:13:24After killing time for a few minutes,
00:13:27I'm going to try and win some money
00:13:28to pay for James May's heating bill this year,
00:13:31which will undoubtedly be down to me.
00:13:34I decided I couldn't be bothered to wait anymore,
00:13:38so I recharged the old-fashioned way
00:13:40and in moments was back on the road.
00:13:46Britain only produces 5% more power
00:13:50than it actually consumes.
00:13:52That's now.
00:13:53So if everybody starts buying electric cars,
00:13:56the power stations won't be able to cope.
00:13:59There'll be power cuts
00:14:00and then there will be looting and anarchy.
00:14:02That's what James is doing.
00:14:04He is bringing Britain to its knees.
00:14:14Oh.
00:14:16Yes.
00:14:17Here's something for Jeremy.
00:14:20Assuming he's got a CD player.
00:14:21He's probably got a cassette player in his Golf GTI.
00:14:23Actually, May couldn't have been more wrong.
00:14:29This car may be from the past, but check this out.
00:14:32It's accelerating now.
00:14:34You can probably hear that.
00:14:35But I'm not doing it.
00:14:36The radar in front of me is maintaining a safe distance
00:14:39behind the car in front.
00:14:42He goes faster, I go faster.
00:14:44He slows down, I slow down.
00:14:46Car pulling out now into the middle lane.
00:14:47And the car will sense that.
00:14:48Yep.
00:14:49It's now dropping me back from that.
00:14:51I don't even have to steer
00:14:53because it'll keep itself between the white lines.
00:14:56Look.
00:14:57Google is making a big fuss.
00:14:59Ooh, aren't we clever?
00:15:00We're making a self-driving car.
00:15:02It's already here.
00:15:03I'm driving it.
00:15:04And it's from 1978.
00:15:06After an hour's charging, I was back on the move.
00:15:14I actually think the service station on the motorway
00:15:16should have an electric car driver section
00:15:19where there are, you know, very complicated jigsaw puzzles
00:15:22and a Monopoly set or maybe some painting by numbers.
00:15:27It is 170 miles to go.
00:15:30God, look at it.
00:15:30It's all the way down there.
00:15:32Many miles ahead, I was busy firing up the GTI's Apple CarPlay system.
00:15:40Right, I'm going to send James May a text message now,
00:15:43which would be illegal in most cars,
00:15:45but not in this one.
00:15:47To whom should I send your message?
00:15:49May.
00:15:51What was that again?
00:15:52Uh-oh, something's wrong.
00:15:54Can you try again?
00:15:56Edit that out.
00:15:57To whom shall I send it?
00:16:00May.
00:16:02I don't know what you mean by Barry.
00:16:04To whom shall I send it?
00:16:06I didn't say Barry.
00:16:07May.
00:16:09This is not doing well, Volkswagen.
00:16:11Come on.
00:16:13OK, what do you want to say to May?
00:16:16May, you're a blithering idiot
00:16:18and your stupid car is ruining my day.
00:16:22Your message to May says
00:16:24your brother is idiot and your stupid car is ready.
00:16:27Ready to send it?
00:16:28Your brother is idiot?
00:16:35What?
00:16:36He's never met my brother.
00:16:37How does he know he's an idiot?
00:16:40Because I'd turned off the motorway
00:16:42to take the more direct route to Dartmoor,
00:16:44I thought I'd better let James know that as well.
00:16:47Um, I'm going on the A34 and the A303.
00:16:54I'll see you there.
00:16:58Your message to May says
00:17:00I'm going on the first floor of the three RC.
00:17:03Ready to send it?
00:17:04I, meanwhile, was using the longer motorway route
00:17:12because there'd be more charging points.
00:17:14But I had my foot down.
00:17:16And now, the electric car of the future
00:17:23is overtaking a Porsche 911 Turbo S.
00:17:28There we go.
00:17:30I'm driving along in a car on the motorway
00:17:34at motorway speeds,
00:17:36overtaking everybody.
00:17:37Oh, no.
00:17:40Since I've filled up,
00:17:41I've used an eighth of a tank.
00:17:45Oh, no.
00:17:48And soon, I was deep in the Devon countryside
00:17:52where my excellent motorway cruising machine
00:17:55had become a GTI.
00:17:57Full sport mode now.
00:18:09It's got an astonishing front differential.
00:18:13So you can hurl the car into any corner
00:18:15at any speed that takes your fancy,
00:18:18knowing you're going to come out on the other side OK.
00:18:24I'm not kidding.
00:18:25On a road like this,
00:18:26with wet leaves and mud everywhere,
00:18:28this car is as fast as any Ferrari.
00:18:33It just is.
00:18:39Many hours from now,
00:18:40James May's going to be coming along here saying,
00:18:43I've got 13% battery and 2% fuel,
00:18:46so if I do 13.8 miles to the gallon,
00:18:49I should...
00:18:50Who was to do maths
00:18:51when they could do lift-off oversteer?
00:18:55In the I-3,
00:18:57thanks to my exuberant driving,
00:19:00I was indeed having to do some maths.
00:19:03Energy management update.
00:19:06I have 36 miles of electric power remaining
00:19:09if I'm driving like this,
00:19:11and 34 miles of petrol range left.
00:19:15So I'm going to stop at these surfaces
00:19:17and I'm going to fill up the little fuel tank.
00:19:23Nine quid.
00:19:24That is absolutely...
00:19:25I've overfilled it, in fact.
00:19:30If you drive a GTI,
00:19:32you're going to get to where you're going more quickly,
00:19:35which means you're going to meet more people,
00:19:39have more experiences,
00:19:40learn more stuff.
00:19:42Speed makes you cleverer.
00:19:50Whereas if you drive a BMW i3,
00:19:53you're going to get everywhere late.
00:19:54You're going to miss out on things.
00:19:56You'll miss out on theatre,
00:19:59culture,
00:20:00poetry,
00:20:01love.
00:20:03You'll be a hollowed-out husk of a man.
00:20:05Connect your vehicle
00:20:10and validate.
00:20:14What do they mean, validate?
00:20:15I've already validated.
00:20:18And here we are.
00:20:20My quest is at an end.
00:20:22I mean, good time,
00:20:23all is well.
00:20:24And I was in for a treat,
00:20:26because joining Roger Daltrey on stage
00:20:28was legendary guitarist
00:20:29Wilco Johnson.
00:20:31The fabulous Wilco Johnson!
00:20:33Station waiting for a charge request
00:20:40from the vehicle.
00:20:42Initialisation,
00:20:43charging.
00:20:45It's not charging.
00:20:51Where will we be, baby?
00:20:54What you gonna do?
00:20:58OK, viewers,
00:20:59here is where we're at.
00:21:01That last charging station
00:21:03wasn't working.
00:21:05We have about 60 miles to go,
00:21:08so the answer is
00:21:09eco-driving.
00:21:11Eco-driving.
00:21:24I'm not switching it into fast mode.
00:21:27It's too wasteful.
00:21:27It is 18 miles to the pub.
00:21:42I have 16 miles of electric left.
00:21:46Is there anything else I can turn off?
00:21:48It is 18 miles to the pub.
00:21:54Finally,
00:21:54after much range anxiety,
00:21:57Roger Daltrey,
00:21:58here I come.
00:22:00I made it.
00:22:08Thanks for coming,
00:22:09and goodnight.
00:22:11Oh, cock.
00:22:12So, hang on.
00:22:19Your car of the future,
00:22:21two of the charging points you went to on that simple journey,
00:22:25two were broken.
00:22:26Yes, that is very unusual,
00:22:27but the point is,
00:22:28if I'd been allowed to set off
00:22:30with a full electric charge
00:22:31and a full little fuel tank,
00:22:33I could have got there,
00:22:33admittedly,
00:22:34a lot of 56 miles an hour,
00:22:35but I would have done it with one stop.
00:22:3756 miles an hour.
00:22:38And the future does sound boring,
00:22:40James.
00:22:40And you still would have missed the gig.
00:22:43That film is out of date.
00:22:44You don't get 5,000 pounds
00:22:45from the government anymore.
00:22:47You only get 4,500 pounds.
00:22:49How will people cope?
00:22:51I think what we've done there
00:22:53is prove his car
00:22:54is not really worth buying just yet.
00:22:56Don't argue it isn't.
00:22:57It's not quite finished.
00:22:58Don't start again.
00:22:58Before we move on,
00:22:59I just want to tell you
00:23:00a little bit more about
00:23:01that Volkswagen system of texting.
00:23:03Because I was using that
00:23:04to send a text from my car
00:23:06the other day
00:23:06to my youngest daughter.
00:23:08And I put four kisses at the end,
00:23:10which is normal.
00:23:11And I said,
00:23:11XXXX, okay?
00:23:13This is what she got.
00:23:14Oh, no!
00:23:15Oh, no, no, no!
00:23:17Oh, that is awkward!
00:23:20Oh!
00:23:21What did she say?
00:23:25Oh, that is awkward.
00:23:26What did she say?
00:23:27XXXX.
00:23:28That's what comes out.
00:23:29What sort of face did she pull
00:23:31when she got that from her dad?
00:23:33Vomiters.
00:23:34Vomiters.
00:23:35We haven't spoken since.
00:23:36Katia, I'm sorry,
00:23:37it was the car!
00:23:38Move on!
00:23:39Yes, let's move on.
00:23:40Because it is now time
00:23:41for us to visit
00:23:42the headquarters
00:23:42of Chat and Company,
00:23:44who are, of course,
00:23:45based on Conversation Street.
00:23:47Vomiters.
00:23:48Vomiters.
00:23:49Vomiters.
00:23:49Vomiters.
00:23:53Vomiters.
00:23:54Vomiters.
00:23:54Vomiters.
00:23:55Vomiters.
00:23:55First one, yeah.
00:23:57Anyway,
00:23:57we begin,
00:23:58we begin
00:23:59with Dubai,
00:24:00in fact.
00:24:01Because the first time
00:24:02came here which was was only 20 years ago it was like a small village I was
00:24:08the tallest thing in it it is unbelievable that you know this shirt
00:24:16is older than everything you can see out of that way James that shirt is older
00:24:21than Carthage mate it is getting on a bit anyway the point I'm trying to make
00:24:24is a few years ago when I first came here there were virtually no motoring
00:24:30laws at all I woke up one morning in my hotel V hotel there was only one in the
00:24:35hotel thinking how did I get back here last night looked out of the window two
00:24:40wheel marks right over the ornamental roundabout and in the flower bed my
00:24:46Range Rover Jeremy were you very tired when you parked it I was off my face
00:24:53barely able to concentrate but it was it was an extraordinary free-for-all which I
00:25:00bet it isn't now it really isn't there there are now very many rules and many
00:25:04stiff punishments I've got some of them here getting behind on the repayments on
00:25:08your car loan you go to prison making rude gestures that are the motorists you go
00:25:13to prison they're all just the things I did when I was 17 all of them every day
00:25:18I was to prove of them just thinking of all the things that you could be sent to
00:25:21prison for in Britain oh if we run it properly very good conversation here's one
00:25:26anyone who takes more than five seconds between getting in their car after
00:25:31filling up with petrol and driving off yeah restaurant owners who serve food on a
00:25:42piece of wood um it's not very car related is it really no it's not but
00:25:46Heston Blumenthal does that yes he does exactly Heston if you're watching prison I
00:25:54hate that food I tell you what I hate I may have mentioned this a couple of times
00:25:58before and I think it should be imprisonable any pilot who allows the
00:26:02cabin of the plane to be more than 68 degrees all planes are too hot these
00:26:09days no no no no God we do have to fly together but obviously I make every effort
00:26:18not to sit near Jeremy Clarkson for a long flight but eventually you know they
00:26:22turn the lights off and it goes all dark and after 10 minutes this voice over in
00:26:26the blackness goes it's literally the hottest place are we flying into the sun if it gets
00:26:34any hotter I shall open a window I've heard all this so many times honestly they don't know why
00:26:40do they do it why are there any pilots here you are a pilot why do you do it boil is all
00:26:48well who do you fly with Etihad how hot are the planes well there's a new rule I'm telling I'm
00:26:55warning you seriously warning you on this one you land if it's gone over 68 in the cabin
00:27:01straight to prison for 50 years can I also say since you're in here no it's worth pointing this out
00:27:09since you're in here when we're all trying to sleep don't come on and tell us the outside
00:27:12temperature is 57 below zero because we don't give a toss anyway let's move it on shall we get back
00:27:24onto some cars yeah travel sort of travel related stuff okay I've got a photograph here of Britain's
00:27:32idea of infrastructure investment okay this is in Cambridge it's um it's a it's a t-junction that
00:27:40they've designed for reasons known only to themselves to look like a roundabout yeah and let me guess it
00:27:46cost a hundred grand to do it no it was five hundred thousand pounds yes of course it was half a million
00:27:51pounds they charge the taxpayer for that for some paving slabs exactly anyway do you boys idea of
00:27:57infrastructure investment is a little bit different because what they're planning is this it's called
00:28:02the hyperloop it's like a tube train and it'll go from Dubai to Abu Dhabi which is about a hundred
00:28:08miles away in 12 minutes 12 minutes that's how long that will take so how fast does it go 500 miles an
00:28:17an hour I mean that is just breathtaking it really is well hang on do you say it was 100 miles yep it's
00:28:24going 100 miles at 500 miles an hour in 12 minutes that means it accelerates to 500 miles an hour
00:28:28instantly hmm you can have trouble holding on to the drinks trolley at that when it sets off you'll
00:28:36poo yourself and then when it stops you'll wee yourself at the end it's a reason are there any doctors
00:28:42I'm just saying I start a medical argument I'm just saying I'm not sure you're right I think
00:28:47well think about Newton if you set off you'll poo yourself yes but when it slows down you'll un-poo
00:28:51yourself because everything has an opposite reaction I'm roughly right aren't I any physicists here I
00:28:59think we should move on yeah right at the beginning of the series Richard Hammond and I came up with a
00:29:05rather brilliant idea called making James May do things he doesn't want to do yeah brilliant idea
00:29:14for an occasional feature we made him go to a donating festival in South Africa he hated it
00:29:20then he thought we'd forgotten about it but we hadn't this is the sort of countryside where people can
00:29:29do nice things like go for a walk or a picnic this however is the sort of countryside that will be my
00:29:37home for the day mud yes I love mud when I say I love mud I mean I hate mud but the people with me
00:29:47here today really do love it they dream of the stuff these people behind me are called winchers and
00:29:55what they like doing is winching they will drive deliberately into something like that puddle over
00:30:02there till they get stuck and then winch themselves out and then when they've done that they'll go and
00:30:09find another one and do it again and again and again and again all day long winchers seem to be
00:30:19obsessed with making life as difficult as possible they put orienteering punches in almost unreachable
00:30:26locations and then try to get their four by fours right up to them as Seamus Doyle my winch buddy for
00:30:34the day explained there's 50 punches dotted around in different parts of the site we have a punch card
00:30:41on the side of the vehicle here you've got to get this punch card to the punch the punch if you're on a
00:30:46string maybe two feet long from the tree or maybe one first so you've got to get punched a number
00:30:50like a hole puncher yes when you get stuck yes you're gonna get stuck yes yeah I have to get
00:30:56out and attach the winch to a tree or a yes you get over you you get your strap with your strap goes
00:31:01on the tree to protect the tree and you bring your winch rope through the tree or whatever
00:31:05obstacle be attached to and I will operate the buttons your English is excellent by the way I can
00:31:10practice in for a long time now yeah yeah a lot of practice got into that as soon as the contest
00:31:18began Seamus made it plain that my new role in life was to be his winch bitch okay I gotta go go go
00:31:29well I've got to get out yeah right where the hell do you think I'm gonna go well with the winch rope
00:31:34dead that tree over there oh man this is like being a hippopotamus okay the clock is ticking
00:31:46having got our first punch I was hoping the day might get a bit less terrible but it didn't
00:31:53I'm winching myself oh that's much better I say it's much better it's less shit go go go come on
00:32:12we got my time I've got a great idea yes why don't you get out and get the punch no why do I have to
00:32:19keep doing guys me being the driver that doesn't walk that way we're next on our lovely Sunday drive
00:32:26we're stuck again gotta wish you out here buddy see the tree over there the place is full of trees
00:32:42this is terrible on the odd occasion when I did manage to sit down in the car Seamus even managed to
00:32:54ruin that that wasn't even necessary you just did that to piss me off no no no
00:33:03we nearly made it James yeah but you didn't now can I go home ground anchor over the hill
00:33:15you just sit there okay yeah okay yeah it's four hours we've been in here now and we've traveled in
00:33:24in reality 150 meters all the things I could be doing today that I would rather do which include self-harm
00:33:35mercifully the contest eventually came to an end and we were finally on our way back to prize giving
00:33:46the good news is we're not going to come last how do you know because one of the boys is brought
00:33:51down since 10 o'clock lucky bastard oh jeez I'm on it I'm on it I'm on it I'm on it no you're gonna
00:33:57overdo it no it's okay you're okay you idiot you're fired you think it's okay you're driving you fool
00:34:05it stinks down here god what is this stuff England at last we made it back for the prize giving
00:34:15so here's a quick sum up at the end of a seven-hour day I've been stuck 50 something times
00:34:26I've fallen over I haven't actually been counting something like 25 times I've nearly drowned in three
00:34:33puddles and that wouldn't be so bad if I was going to win a winch or a winch cover or a new piece of
00:34:39rope or something like that but in fact in the rollover we tore the punch card off which means
00:34:44technically we've got to start again from the beginning but I've decided to go and drown myself
00:34:49instead so James was there any aspect of that that you liked no good so moving on it's time now to
00:35:11play celebrity brain crash that doesn't get any better anyway our guest today is a shining star from
00:35:28the world of Formula One he's also a very brave young man because even though he's fully aware of
00:35:34all of the calamities that have befallen all the other celebrities that have tried to come to our tent
00:35:40he's elected to arrive in a hovercraft ladies and gentlemen Daniel Ricciardo
00:35:45putting his helmet on that's a wise move I think a wise move I genuinely genuinely love Daniel Ricciardo because he is a truly nice man
00:36:00yeah he's truly nice man and he's also extremely happy he is cheerful I just well the trouble is I know from personal experience
00:36:06hovercrafts are tricky to control Jeremy he's a Formula One driver he's got this covered don't worry about it is windy oh here he comes here he is arriving now
00:36:15he's fine with wrestling with the controls he's going well yeah he's overshot he has overshot a bit there oh dear
00:36:22oh no oh there's been no there's been a no oh god he's going in the fan he's going in the fan oh no
00:36:31oh no oh no oh that
00:36:36oh that
00:36:40oh that
00:36:44the helmet the helmet has now thankfully jammed the motor with his head yeah it's too late
00:36:50oh
00:36:52um
00:36:54does that mean he's not coming on then
00:36:57well James he's been liquidized and now he's all over the windows so no he's not
00:37:02yeah he's not in the tent so much as on it
00:37:04yeah
00:37:05um
00:37:06oh
00:37:07oh
00:37:08oh no we've got to do something
00:37:09well I'm going to go and clean that off
00:37:10yeah
00:37:11he's distracting and off-putting
00:37:13and how do we fill the time
00:37:14it's all right because I thought something like this might happen
00:37:17so when we arrived last night I went out and I made a little film yesterday
00:37:21yes
00:37:22yeah well let's
00:37:23well we didn't cover this up
00:37:24sorry
00:37:25I'd like to talk to you now
00:37:27we need to tighten the shock
00:37:28yeah okay that's a good idea
00:37:29tighten it on him
00:37:30just our faces
00:37:31concentrate on me and what I'm saying
00:37:34and not on anything else that you might be tempted to look at
00:37:37yeah
00:37:38um now the Porsche 918 earlier in this series of programs we saw it in action and proved that it is the ultimate of the hypercar holy trinity
00:37:47when we put it against the Ferrari and the McLaren
00:37:50but I've always wondered how would it fare in a straight race against a Bugatti Veyron
00:37:54and as we are in the home of the hypercar this is the place to find out
00:37:58yeah no tie it on me
00:38:00we're talking good
00:38:01um this is then
00:38:02this is a
00:38:03it's a race
00:38:04between the future and the past
00:38:06second time
00:38:07this evening
00:38:08much like your film only this one is exciting
00:38:10so here we are the grand old man of performance coming out one more time to defend his title
00:38:37against one of the young upstarts
00:38:39here's how it all pans out on paper
00:38:41Bugatti Veyron 0-60 2.5 seconds
00:38:44power to weight ratio 523 brake horsepower per tonne
00:38:48the 918 0-60 2.6 seconds
00:38:52but a power to weight ratio of 535 brake horsepower per tonne
00:38:57however as we learned when we raced the 918 against the LaFerrari and the P1 in our first show
00:39:02hard facts like that count for nothing
00:39:05in the end it's all down to this
00:39:09and I'm ready to race
00:39:15actually
00:39:17yeah
00:39:19last bit of dead skin
00:39:29okay
00:39:36launch control
00:39:37race mode
00:39:41representing the future here
00:39:59I think
00:40:00am I going to just stay ahead
00:40:10this is going to be so close
00:40:12the future is going to take it
00:40:18I'm so sorry Veyron
00:40:19but your crown is gone
00:40:21wow
00:40:22what a device this is
00:40:25I was going to call it a day at that obviously
00:40:30but
00:40:31there's a bloke here
00:40:32wants to race his Nissan
00:40:34it's a bit embarrassing really
00:40:37but
00:40:38you don't want to upset the locals
00:40:39so
00:40:40okay
00:40:41race is on
00:40:42here we go
00:40:46let's get this over with
00:40:48do race
00:40:49apologize
00:40:50move on
00:40:51what
00:41:04he's pulling away
00:41:05in a Nissan Patrol
00:41:06what
00:41:08just
00:41:09happened
00:41:10what
00:41:17just
00:41:19happened
00:41:20what
00:41:21just
00:41:22happened
00:41:23the
00:41:24the
00:41:25the
00:41:26the
00:41:30the
00:41:32the
00:41:33series we
00:41:34bigged up the
00:41:35hyper car
00:41:36holy trinity
00:41:37as the three greatest cars
00:41:38ever to have been conceived and invented
00:41:40yeah
00:41:41and the fastest of all of them
00:41:42yes
00:41:43was beaten
00:41:44by a Datsun van
00:41:45yes
00:41:48yes
00:41:49yes
00:41:50what the hell engines
00:41:51well it turns out it's got
00:41:521,900 horsepower
00:41:55what would Portia thinking of
00:41:57I know they're just
00:41:58back to the drawing boards lads
00:41:59and we'll gloss over that
00:42:00exactly right
00:42:01your embarrassing mistake
00:42:02Portia
00:42:04now
00:42:05I'd like to make a confession
00:42:06actually
00:42:07and it's this
00:42:08I've never been able to drift
00:42:09properly
00:42:10it's just
00:42:12I know just ignore him
00:42:14nothing to see
00:42:15nothing to see here
00:42:16nothing to see here
00:42:17just a man doing his job
00:42:18okay
00:42:19never been able to drift
00:42:20properly
00:42:21I can provoke a car
00:42:22you know into
00:42:23into a slide
00:42:24but I couldn't hold it there
00:42:25it would always be a spin-off
00:42:26and crash
00:42:27no exactly I mean
00:42:28everything you've ever seen
00:42:29in the past of him drifting
00:42:30has been done with smoke
00:42:31mirrors
00:42:32clever editing
00:42:33and let's be honest
00:42:34stunt drivers
00:42:35so
00:42:36I decided when we started
00:42:37making Grand Tour
00:42:38that I had to go out
00:42:39and change that
00:42:40and learn how to do it
00:42:41properly
00:42:48one option would be
00:42:49to go to a supermarket car park
00:42:51on a Saturday night
00:42:52but instead
00:42:53I came here
00:42:54to France
00:43:01specifically to the top secret
00:43:03Ledoux test centre
00:43:04where Michelin develops its tyres
00:43:07there are several reasons
00:43:11why I'm here
00:43:12first
00:43:13they have the space
00:43:1427 miles of test tracks
00:43:19and skid pans
00:43:20second
00:43:21if you want to understand drifting
00:43:26you have to understand tyres
00:43:28and this place
00:43:29is a tyre temple
00:43:30third and most important
00:43:42if you want to know about tyres
00:43:44you have to know how to drift
00:43:46and that is where this chap comes in
00:43:49his name is Jerome Haslam
00:43:56and he is Michelin's chief tyre tester
00:43:59for BMW, Porsche, Ferrari and Bugatti
00:44:02rubber compound runs through his veins
00:44:06he is a zen master of grip
00:44:08a kung fu panda of drifting
00:44:10and I am to be his new pupil
00:44:13for us drifting
00:44:18is more serious
00:44:20because when we evaluate tyre performances
00:44:24especially
00:44:25we need to evaluate the performances
00:44:27not before the limit
00:44:28or on the limit
00:44:30like in racing
00:44:31but over the limit
00:44:36this is what he means
00:44:38by over the limit
00:44:39he uses power
00:44:41to kick the back of the car
00:44:42out of line
00:44:43and then
00:44:44a delicate balance
00:44:45of throttle and steering
00:44:46to keep it there
00:44:50your steering wheel technique
00:44:52is amazing
00:44:53I play a lot
00:44:54with the gas pedal
00:44:59and if you work a lot
00:45:00with the gas
00:45:01you have nothing to do
00:45:02with the steering
00:45:03you can do all
00:45:04with one hand
00:45:06so you're steering the car
00:45:07with your right foot
00:45:08yes
00:45:12Jerome, this is brilliant
00:45:13that I learned how to do this
00:45:14because
00:45:15you read those lists
00:45:16on the internet
00:45:17of things that women
00:45:18appreciate in a man
00:45:19don't you?
00:45:20and there's always
00:45:21honesty, integrity
00:45:22loyalty
00:45:23fidelity
00:45:24drifting
00:45:25it's always there
00:45:27on that note
00:45:28it was time for me
00:45:29to begin my lesson
00:45:31you can perhaps
00:45:32put the seat more
00:45:34more what?
00:45:35more close to the steering wheel
00:45:36what do you want to say?
00:45:37what do you want to say?
00:45:41okay, so
00:45:42here we go
00:45:43evoking oversteer
00:45:44coming off
00:45:45and then feeding
00:45:46no, then going round
00:45:47in a small circle
00:45:51my challenge was
00:45:52to drift the car
00:45:53for one complete lap
00:45:54gas
00:45:55gas
00:45:56oversteer
00:45:57release gas
00:45:58countersteer
00:45:59release gas
00:46:00countersteer
00:46:01oh, spun
00:46:02okay
00:46:03gas, gas, gas, gas
00:46:05gas, gas
00:46:06oh, bugger
00:46:07go
00:46:09soon
00:46:10soon
00:46:11the constant spinning
00:46:12started to have an effect
00:46:13on my teacher
00:46:14little bit more power
00:46:16no
00:46:17off the gas
00:46:20off the gas
00:46:25this is weird
00:46:26I thought this would be so easy
00:46:31okay, it's possible to take air
00:46:33fresh air
00:46:34yeah
00:46:35I will be here in two minutes
00:46:38is this going badly?
00:46:39badly
00:46:43while Jerome went off to say hello to his breakfast
00:46:49I continued plugging away
00:46:53begin power, begin countersteer immediately
00:46:55now hold it
00:46:56and soon
00:46:59and soon
00:47:00it started to click
00:47:04what I am doing
00:47:05is drifting
00:47:06there's no denying that
00:47:08oh yes
00:47:09yes
00:47:10I've connected the steering wheel
00:47:13my feet
00:47:14this is a whole new feeling
00:47:16this is not reacting to a slide
00:47:18this is deliberately provoking it
00:47:20and keeping it right on the point
00:47:27haha, Jerome, you French
00:47:29drift and ski instructing dude
00:47:31you
00:47:32you'll be impressed with this
00:47:35and he was
00:47:36so we immediately progressed to the next level
00:47:41just before we start, Jerome
00:47:42are you going to make this look really annoyingly easy?
00:47:45yeah, you are
00:47:46okay
00:47:48he did
00:47:50this is called transitioning
00:47:52drifting the car one way and then the other
00:47:56get it right
00:47:57get it right
00:47:58and it's almost balletic
00:48:06that
00:48:07is beautiful
00:48:08from that
00:48:09to that
00:48:10seamlessly
00:48:13which
00:48:14sadly
00:48:15couldn't be said
00:48:16of what followed
00:48:18oh
00:48:21wow
00:48:26em
00:48:27the
00:48:28bmw
00:48:29know
00:48:30we are using their car
00:48:31BMW know we're using their car.
00:48:37I don't think so.
00:48:38Okay.
00:48:40Eventually, though.
00:48:45Yeah!
00:48:54Yeah, that was the transition.
00:48:56Your first.
00:49:01By the end of the day, I really had got it mastered.
00:49:06I'd become, for the first time, a driving god.
00:49:18It really is, it really is the most amazing feeling
00:49:22when you get just the right amount of power to spin the back wheels,
00:49:25but not so much that you don't spin the whole car
00:49:27and you just hold it on the edge.
00:49:29No, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
00:49:30He came back from France where he'd spent one day
00:49:33saying, well, I'm brilliant now.
00:49:35Yeah, well, I am.
00:49:36Well, now, I'm sorry, Hammond, it took me ten years
00:49:39to learn how to drift a car.
00:49:41Yeah, yeah.
00:49:42Mm-hmm.
00:49:43Because I'm not an ape, I did it in one day.
00:49:47You didn't!
00:49:48Well, look, anyway, it doesn't matter.
00:49:50To find out if he was a driving god, Clarkson and I arranged for Richard Hammond
00:49:55to take part in a drifting contest.
00:49:58Yeah, we did. We fixed up the car for him.
00:50:00We fixed up the competitors. We did everything.
00:50:03This is the car.
00:50:11It started out as a Nissan 200S Edge,
00:50:14but it's been fitted with a 700-horsepower 6.2-litre V8
00:50:18and a modified steering rack.
00:50:21So it can do this.
00:50:47Its owner, a chap called Steve Bagzi Biagioni,
00:50:50said that to prepare for my competition,
00:50:53I needed to put some melons on a row of traffic cones.
00:50:57What are we doing with these?
00:50:59Can I put mine down? They're really heavy.
00:51:01Well, in a drifting competition, you have what's called clipping points.
00:51:04Yes.
00:51:05So these will be determined points on the track made by the judges
00:51:08as to where they want to see the car.
00:51:10Clipping points are melons?
00:51:12Melons, yes.
00:51:14My orders were to get as close to the melons as possible
00:51:17without hitting them.
00:51:20We're just going to concentrate on looking for the middle of the track,
00:51:24yeah?
00:51:25And aim the back of the car near them melons.
00:51:28Okay.
00:51:30Right.
00:51:31When you're ready, go for it.
00:51:33Bollocks!
00:51:43Having not really mastered this at all...
00:51:46Oh, shit!
00:51:48It was time for the event organized by Clarkson and May to begin.
00:51:57What they've done is told me to report here, Rockingham Raceway,
00:52:01where they've arranged for me to take on two drifters in some competitive drifting.
00:52:06The course was a series of classic transitional bends.
00:52:13Strategically peppered with the dreaded clipping points.
00:52:19Bagsey was on hand to explain how the scoring worked.
00:52:23The main thing about drifting is that it's a judge sport.
00:52:26And the judges have placed the clipping points on the circuit where they want to see the car.
00:52:30So that'll either be the rear of the car or the front of the car.
00:52:34The closer you get to the clipping points, the more points you're going to get awarded.
00:52:38But the key is to not hit them.
00:52:39If you can brush them, you're going to get maximum points.
00:52:42Now, when I say brush, I mean don't knock them over.
00:52:45If you can be within half a meter, you're going to score high.
00:52:49I'd also score points for holding the car in as impressive a drift as possible.
00:52:56You've also got to keep the throttle in so that you maintain the drift with good angle.
00:53:00And that's going to be only up to you about how much steering input and how much accelerator you put in.
00:53:06The cars are designed to run at almost 90 degrees.
00:53:09They've got massive amounts of steering angle.
00:53:11Yeah.
00:53:12So you can drive on the end of your rack.
00:53:13Okay.
00:53:14So I don't get awarded points for how quickly I do the whole thing?
00:53:17No.
00:53:18That doesn't come into it.
00:53:19It's all about angle, line, and how much you excite everybody.
00:53:24It's judged showing off, isn't it?
00:53:26Basically, yeah.
00:53:27Yeah.
00:53:28Okay.
00:53:30As my car was prepped for the big event, the competitors, organised by my colleagues, finally arrived.
00:53:37And they weren't what I was expecting.
00:53:43It seems James and Jeremy want their old mate to do well after all.
00:53:47Because unless I'm mistaken, it would appear that I'm up against a child and a man with no arms.
00:53:55Okay.
00:53:56That's my competition.
00:53:57With the judges in position, it was time for the contest to begin.
00:54:10First up was the disabled gentleman, Bartek Ostolowski from Poland.
00:54:17The fact is, Bartek is deficient in the arms department to the tune of two.
00:54:24When I say deficient, that's a load.
00:54:26I don't mean deficient.
00:54:27He has no arms at all.
00:54:30So that was brilliant that he was having a go.
00:54:33Really, it's tremendous.
00:54:35Bartek, who lost his arms in a motorcycling accident, overcomes his disability by steering with his foot and changing gear with his shoulder.
00:54:46And unfortunately for me, he's rather good at it.
00:54:50How is he?
00:55:09Whoa!
00:55:11Whoa!
00:55:34Good for you!
00:55:36Really good for you!
00:55:38Yeah!
00:55:39Good.
00:55:40This was nice out of a maximum of 30 points the judges awarded Bartek a score of 22
00:55:50And then it was the turn of the child Connor Shannon who's just 13 years old
00:56:00Here we go primary school drifting with Connor. He'll go 10 yards get bored and start crying for his mummy
00:56:08However
00:56:10Oh
00:56:2413
00:56:40Oh
00:56:42Oh
00:56:44Oh
00:56:46Oh
00:56:48Oh
00:56:50Oh
00:56:52Oh
00:56:54Oh
00:56:56Oh
00:56:58Oh
00:57:00Oh
00:57:02Oh
00:57:04Oh
00:57:06Oh
00:57:08Oh
00:57:10Oh
00:57:12Oh
00:57:14Oh
00:57:16Oh
00:57:18Oh
00:57:20Oh
00:57:22Oh
00:57:24Oh
00:57:26Oh
00:57:28Oh
00:57:30Oh
00:57:32Oh
00:57:34Oh
00:57:36Oh
00:57:38Oh
00:57:40Oh
00:57:42Oh
00:57:44Oh
00:57:46Oh
00:57:48Oh
00:57:50Oh
00:57:52Oh
00:57:54Oh
00:57:56Oh
00:57:58Oh
00:58:00Oh
00:58:02Oh
00:58:04Oh
00:58:06Oh
00:58:08Oh
00:58:10Oh
00:58:12Oh
00:58:14Oh
00:58:32Oh
00:58:34Oh
00:58:36Oh
00:58:38Oh
00:58:40Oh
00:58:42Oh
00:58:44Oh
00:58:46Oh
00:58:48Oh
00:58:50Oh
00:58:52Oh
00:58:54Oh
00:58:56Oh
00:58:58Oh
00:59:02Oh
00:59:04Oh
00:59:06Oh
00:59:08Oh
00:59:12Oh
00:59:14Oh
00:59:16Oh
00:59:18Oh
00:59:20Oh
00:59:22Oh
00:59:24Oh
00:59:26Oh
00:59:28Oh
00:59:30Oh
00:59:32Oh
00:59:34No
00:59:36Oh
00:59:38Oh
00:59:40Oh
00:59:42Oh
00:59:44Oh
00:59:46Oh
00:59:51Oh
00:59:54Oh
00:59:56Oh
00:59:57Hammond, can he contain 170 horsepower? No, it would appear not.
01:00:03Jeremy Clarkson, Porsche 911 GT3.
01:00:05Oh, there we go, you see? I have actually made a mess of that.
01:00:08Yes, you have, and we saw it.
01:00:10Richard Hammond negotiating your name here.
01:00:13Your name in this instance is Total Bellend, it would appear.
01:00:16Clarkson, has he tamed the GT3?
01:00:19No!
01:00:20I've had an idea. Hold on.
01:00:22I bet it wasn't this.
01:00:26What's this?
01:00:27Really?
01:00:28Never say that, even if you're just in a four-door family saloon.
01:00:32It's disastrous.
01:00:34Right, Richard Hammond, has he got it yet?
01:00:36Yes, I think he has. Yes. Yes.
01:00:40No.
01:00:41No, no, he hasn't got it.
01:00:42I'll tell you what, everything's perfect.
01:00:45There's a couple.
01:00:46Yeah, there's a two or three, four, five.
01:00:49Don't worry, don't worry.
01:00:51In the future, we'll just get an armless man and a small boy to do those things.
01:00:54Shut up, shut up.
01:00:56As opposed to a fat man and a small boy.
01:00:58Anyway.
01:01:00Yes, and on that terrible disappointment, it is time to air not just the show, but the entire series.
01:01:06Thank you so much for watching.
01:01:07Thank you all for coming.
01:01:08And we'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:12Take care.
01:01:13Goodbye.
01:01:13We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:14We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:15We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:16We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:17We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:18We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:19We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:20We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:21We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:22We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:23We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
01:01:24We'll see you later in the year for more of this.
1:01:58
|
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