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05:45Thank you!
06:08I love this show.
06:10See that guy later right there?
06:12You mean Saber?
06:14She knows their names.
06:17Saber's my cousin.
06:18You got a cousin on television?
06:21Sure.
06:21Of course, he's not the only successful fall, though.
06:24I have an uncle at Harvard.
06:26Does he teach?
06:27Nope.
06:28His head's in a glass jar.
06:34So, how's it going, Roof Riders in the Sky?
06:37Steve, be careful.
06:38This is not a dance floor.
06:40And what are you doing up here anyway?
06:42Didn't I tell you to stay away?
06:43Oh, now, come on, Carl.
06:45That little electrocution thing
06:46should be a dim memory by now.
06:57Hey.
06:59That cleared my sinuses.
07:03Steve, we're almost done up here.
07:05Don't mess things up.
07:06Well, look, I'll just have a little look-see.
07:12Let's see here.
07:13Uh-huh.
07:14Uh-huh.
07:17Uh-oh.
07:18What uh-oh?
07:19Well, you use wood screws
07:21instead of masonry screws.
07:23Sloppy, sloppy, sloppy.
07:25Wood screws are good enough.
07:27Well, sure, as long as the wind never blows.
07:29One good taste and this baby's a lawn sculpture.
07:33Steve, get off this roof.
07:35Now, Carl, I think you're being...
07:37Get off this roof.
07:37If you just give me...
07:38Get off this roof.
07:39Get off this roof.
07:40Get off this roof.
07:41I don't have to take this.
07:43I'm getting off this roof.
07:46Whoa.
07:47Whoa.
07:47Watch out.
07:48Watch out.
07:49No, no, no.
07:50I don't know.
07:56Oh, no.
07:57Oh, no.
07:59Oh, no.
08:00Oh, no.
08:00Oh, no.
08:01Oh, no.
08:01Oh, no.
08:01Oh, no.
08:02Oh, no.
08:03Oh, no.
08:04Oh, no.
08:06Oh, no.
08:15Wood screws aren't good enough.
08:27I'm sure you're all right.
08:32I'm fine.
08:33Fortunately, we landed on Steve.
08:36Slowly, slowly, slowly.
08:38Come on, Waldo.
08:39Let's go get some ice.
08:41Good idea.
08:42Because my soda pops warm.
08:51I'm fine, everyone.
08:57Really?
08:58I can do it on my own.
09:01Steve, are you okay?
09:03Oh, I'm peachy cane.
09:07I only fell 20 feet and had all the male members of your family land on me.
09:13So, I'd appreciate an apology.
09:17What?
09:18Do you want me to apologize to you?
09:24Oh, no.
09:25Oh, no.
09:26Oh, no.
09:27Please.
09:27I came over to lend a helping hand.
09:30But you were rude, impatient, and not a nice host.
09:34You ruined our satellite dish.
09:37And you almost killed me and my son.
09:41And you think that justifies coarse behavior.
09:50Steve.
09:52Go home.
09:53Now, Carl, I'm going to give you one.
09:54Go home.
09:55Go home.
09:55Go home.
09:56Go home.
09:58I don't have to take this.
10:00I'm going home.
10:05And don't you ever come back.
10:10What did you say?
10:12Oh, you heard me.
10:14Don't ever come back.
10:17I will not be bullied.
10:20I love this lady.
10:22And I'll come over here anytime I want to.
10:25And you can't stop me.
10:28I'm going to kill him.
10:29Come on.
10:32Come on.
10:33Come on.
10:34Come on.
10:34Come on.
10:34Come on.
10:34Come on.
10:35Come on.
10:35You come and get it.
10:36Come take my fist apart.
10:38Harry, let me go.
10:39No.
10:40I'll give you money.
10:44What's going on?
10:46What's going on?
10:47Stop it.
10:49Stop it.
10:50Stop it.
10:51Stop it.
10:51Stop this.
10:55Now, this is no way to behave.
10:58You two are friends.
11:00Buddies.
11:01Neighbors.
11:02We live in a civilized society.
11:04And by golly, we should handle our differences in a civilized way.
11:08Fortunately, I have a cousin that can make that happen.
11:21Tonight on American Gladiators, a special grudge match between Beauty Neighbors.
11:26That's right, Mike.
11:27Tonight's matchup is between Carl Bone Crusher Winslow and Steve Hurricane Harkle.
11:41It looks like quite a matchup, so stay tuned, America.
11:55Welcome back.
11:56Welcome back.
11:56And let's talk to our feuding neighbors.
11:58Bone Crusher, I understand that besides our cash prize, you have a little side bet going.
12:02That's right, Mike.
12:04If I win, and I most certainly will, he has to stay away from my house for the rest of
12:09his life.
12:11And Hurricane, what happens if you win?
12:13Oh, there's no if, Mr. Zonka.
12:16When I win, this rude cop has to give me a heartfelt apology.
12:22So, say it, don't spray it.
12:25Okay, gentlemen, go get ready for the first event, and good luck.
12:32Let's see our contestants match up.
12:40Yes, sir, this is a classic David and Goliath matchup.
12:44It's strength versus agility.
12:46And, Larry, our first event is the joust.
12:48The contestant has 30 seconds to try to knock the gladiator from his platform.
12:52If he does, he gets 10 points.
12:54First up, Steve Hurricane Harkle, but he draws the awesome turbo.
13:14Steve, where are your glasses?
13:17I don't need them.
13:18I got contacts.
13:20I don't care who you know.
13:22Where are your glasses?
13:28Get in, buddy!
13:30Knock him, city!
13:31Knock his sights out!
13:34I'm good!
13:36Oh, my God!
13:44Wow!
13:48Hurricane's doing a pretty good job of avoiding that pugil.
13:51Spoke too soon.
13:56That's Turbo's 11th victory this season.
14:01Steve!
14:06Steve!
14:13Steve, you've got to stop this.
14:14Please quit right now.
14:16But why?
14:18I don't want to see you get hurt, okay?
14:21You do love me.
14:23Now I'll never quit.
14:24Lord, give me the strength to win for my woman!
14:32Okay, Mike.
14:33Let's see how one of Chicago's finest fares against Turbo.
14:38Turbo.
14:46Look out.
14:47Turbo took a hard one.
14:48Oh, he's in trouble.
14:52Bone Crusher!
14:53Wow!
14:55Bone Crusher taking an early lead in the competition.
15:00You hit my husband again, and you'll have to answer to me.
15:03Oh, he chose that again!
15:05Yeah, spread the word.
15:07Don't mess with Mrs. Bone Crusher.
15:14Okay, Steve, you're down 10 points.
15:17I may be down, but I'm far from out, my mean Mike man.
15:21Well, Hurricane, it's time for the wall.
15:22You've got to get to the top before the gladiator pulls you off.
15:26Do you think you can do it?
15:27Piece of cake!
15:30Go!
15:30Fine!
15:33Predators, ready!
15:39Whoa, listen to that crowd!
15:49Circle's looking good.
15:51He's looking great.
15:51This kid's got some real moves.
15:53Well, he told me earlier he spent most of his life dodging really, really big guys.
16:03He's off!
16:04Calling all units.
16:05Officer, down.
16:12Ah!
16:13Ow!
16:14Look, look!
16:15Arnold Schwarzenegger!
16:16Whip!
16:18Whoa!
16:19Looks like Saber was on the wrong end of that kick.
16:22Now, there's nothing between Hurricane and the top of the wall, Larry.
16:29He's over!
16:33And that ties the score, 10 to 10.
16:44Larry, what the heck is that?
16:47Let's hope it's a victory dance.
16:52Our eliminator obstacle course is the final event where the contestant has to go up a treadmill,
16:56across the handbite, over a spinning log, up a cargo net, down a zip line, and then down
17:02this final straightaway, through the gauntlet, and finally across the finish line.
17:07We're down to the final event.
17:08The score is tied.
17:10Whoever wins the eliminator, wins the match.
17:13Get ready!
17:21Well, look out.
17:23Bone Crusher's having some trouble with the treadmill.
17:25Well, it's tough.
17:26You know, it isn't exactly the escalator at the mall.
17:38Hey, Bone Crusher's coming back.
17:40Hey, we're going to have to downgrade Hurricane Urkel to a tropical depression.
17:45I kind of like that weather analogy.
17:47Oh, thanks, Mike.
18:02Whoa!
18:06Urkel will have to wait five seconds before he can continue on.
18:10Maybe the rest will help.
18:21Man, oh, man.
18:22Bone Crusher's caught in the net.
18:23How many times have we seen that happen before?
18:25Uh, 15.
18:27It was a rhetorical question, Larry.
18:29Oh.
18:32Uh-oh.
18:33Hurricane is catching up.
18:34Hey, this guy's one tough little cookie.
18:36I don't know why they call him a nerd.
18:37You didn't see him in a street club.
18:46Look at this.
18:47We've got a race.
18:59Saber and Turbo activating the gauntlet,
19:02and here they come down the final straightaway.
19:13Two tired athletes,
19:14but, Larry, it looks like we've got a race here.
19:33Two tired athletes,
19:35but, Larry, it looks like we've got a race here.
19:35And it looks like it's Bone Crusher.
19:39Oh, it's Hurricane.
19:42It's a photo finish.
19:45Let's take a look at the freeze frame of that exciting conclusion.
19:51It's official.
19:52We have a tie.
19:53The first tie we've ever had here on American Gladiators.
19:56Gentlemen, great news.
19:58It was a tie.
19:59What?
20:00You take a five-minute break, and you get to do it all over again.
20:04No, no, no, no, no, no.
20:06No, look, Steve.
20:07Would you want to excuse us here?
20:12Steve.
20:14Look, you win.
20:16Uh-uh.
20:17You win.
20:18I'll never come over to your house again.
20:21Well, no, I don't want that.
20:23Listen, Carl.
20:25I don't blame you for being upset about that electrocution thing.
20:28I mean, the sudden catastrophic loss of seven or eight million brain cells
20:32would make anyone blow a fuse.
20:35Well, it probably smarted a little when I landed on top of you.
20:39A little?
20:40It was like being body slammed by a Steinway.
20:46But what hurt me even more, big guy, was the thought of being banished from your home.
20:53Like, that's a pain too horrible to bear.
20:59Really?
21:01I know I'm a pest, Carl.
21:05But I love you, big guy.
21:10And I, and I, admire your persistence.
21:20That's getting up for me.
21:22I love you, big guy.
21:52I love you, big guy.
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