#TheGrandTour #OneForTheRoad #ClarksonHammondMay #FinalLap #ZimbabweSpecial
After 22 years of automotive mayhem, the trio—Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, and James May—have reached the end of the road. In their final special, "One For The Road," they head to Zimbabwe in three cars they’ve always wanted to own: a Lancia Montecarlo, a Ford Capri, and a Triumph Stag. We dive into the most emotional moments, the stunning African landscapes, and the legacy left behind by the men who changed car television forever. Goodbye to the best car show in the world.
#AmazonPrime #CarReview #JeremyClarkson #RichardHammond #JamesMay #AutomotiveHistory
After 22 years of automotive mayhem, the trio—Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, and James May—have reached the end of the road. In their final special, "One For The Road," they head to Zimbabwe in three cars they’ve always wanted to own: a Lancia Montecarlo, a Ford Capri, and a Triumph Stag. We dive into the most emotional moments, the stunning African landscapes, and the legacy left behind by the men who changed car television forever. Goodbye to the best car show in the world.
#AmazonPrime #CarReview #JeremyClarkson #RichardHammond #JamesMay #AutomotiveHistory
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MotorTranscript
00:01:02Hello, everybody.
00:01:03Thank you so much.
00:01:11Hello.
00:01:12Thank you very much.
00:01:15Welcome.
00:01:15Now, coming up in today's show, James wears glasses, I pretend to be a dog, and a terrorist eats a
00:01:27savoury snack.
00:01:28You've got everything there.
00:01:38Now, throughout the developing world, people have, for many years, used Japanese-made pickup trucks.
00:01:45Yes, but now European car makers have decided they want a piece of the action, so they've come up with
00:01:50pickup trucks of their own.
00:01:51Yes, they have.
00:01:52And to find out if they're any good, this week we take the grand tour on a journey through history.
00:01:58We begin in the Middle Ages, which meant going to Richard Hammond's garden.
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00:02:52pulling a plough.
00:02:56Yep, I'm actually ploughing with my picker.
00:03:00I don't think I could be any happier.
00:03:05And I was using this Volkswagen Amarok as an irrigation system.
00:03:12I'm using it to drive a pump,
00:03:15which will deliver nourishment from the well to the community allotment.
00:03:19In fact, I can hear the water coming now.
00:03:22Above the smooth, turbo-charged throb of my V6 diesel.
00:03:39Sort it out!
00:03:41Get it!
00:03:47Hammond! What?
00:03:49We've got to get... How do you get that back?
00:03:51I don't know! You set it free!
00:03:54Whoa!
00:03:55It's angry! You made it angry!
00:03:57Run away!
00:03:59Ow!
00:04:09Oh, you...
00:04:11Oh!
00:04:12Clarkson!
00:04:16Send the car off!
00:04:21What was that?
00:04:24Oh, dear!
00:04:25Oh, dear!
00:04:26And there, and there, and I've done my neck in.
00:04:28This is supposed to be a demonstration of the utility of pick-up trucks.
00:04:32We've done it! We've proved all three of them!
00:04:34No, I have. I've sawn three pieces of wood for a fence.
00:04:37Hammond's ploughed four furrows for growing things in.
00:04:41You have only subtracted from this community.
00:04:43You've taken away the vegetables, you've taken away the electricity,
00:04:46you've taken away the lighting,
00:04:47you've taken away the ability to make the new fence posts...
00:04:50Well, I have proved...
00:04:50...and you've taken away the food!
00:04:51But my engine is very powerful.
00:04:53More powerful than in your two.
00:04:55Yeah, well, what's the use of that?
00:04:57Speed and power.
00:04:57It's not speed and power, you know, just...
00:04:59Look! Look what it did! Look what it did!
00:05:02Yours couldn't have delivered that much water that quickly.
00:05:04Yeah, thankfully, because it wouldn't have done that.
00:05:07I think you've slightly missed the point.
00:05:09Why do you always have to overdo everything?
00:05:13I mean...
00:05:13You can shut up.
00:05:14Why?
00:05:15Because it's supposed to be a test of European pick-up trucks.
00:05:18And it's European?
00:05:19Well, yes, apart from the fact that it was designed in Australia,
00:05:23and it's built in South Africa.
00:05:24What about the engine?
00:05:26That's made in Turkey. That's European.
00:05:28Well, a bit of it is.
00:05:30Well, look, let's not get bogged down with where Turkey is.
00:05:33What we've done is prove that all three of them work well
00:05:36when there is peace in the village in the developing world.
00:05:40What we must do now is find out how well they work
00:05:43when the peace comes to an end and there's a revolution.
00:05:58When the revolution is over,
00:06:01it's important that all traces of the vile, hated dictator are eradicated.
00:06:07And that's why I'm attaching my Mercedes to this giant statue of Kim Jong Clarkson
00:06:12to see if I can pull it over.
00:06:21Right, here are the rules.
00:06:22I have to do this using the lowest revs possible.
00:06:25So what I'm going to do is put it in four-wheel drive low range,
00:06:30something Jeremy Clarkson can't do, first-gear manual,
00:06:34and turn the traction control off.
00:06:36You know that isn't really a Mercedes, don't you?
00:06:39No, no. It's just a Nissan with Mercedes written on it.
00:06:41It's got a Nissan engine. Yeah.
00:06:43And that's his problem, because it's only a 2.3 four-cylinder diesel.
00:06:48Right. Taking up the slack.
00:06:51When do you have to use power and torque to do a job?
00:06:55James is the first man you go for.
00:06:57Here we go.
00:06:59Traction control, diff lock, down your cub.
00:07:13Oh! Oh, hello.
00:07:17Yeah!
00:07:27He's gone!
00:07:28That was just right on your tongue.
00:07:31What a feeling.
00:07:32Oh, I bet that did that.
00:07:34That was just...
00:07:34That is in the face.
00:07:36Yes.
00:07:36By the whole earth.
00:07:37In the face.
00:07:38Do you see what happened to your nose?
00:07:39Look at it.
00:07:40Yes.
00:07:40And now, it's your turn, because...
00:07:44Yeah.
00:07:44Matesy tongue.
00:07:50Right, it's time for your reign of terror to end.
00:07:53He may be the most stubborn man in the world, but he's no match for the engine in this Ford
00:07:59Ranger.
00:08:00I have, of course, more power in this than in his Nissan. 197 brake to his 188 and more torque.
00:08:08This engine is strong, strong enough to pull a train, literally, because they are actually using the five-cylinder diesel
00:08:13out of this in the new Viva Rail 230 commuter class train.
00:08:18You know he's got one more cylinder than you.
00:08:22Yeah, that's because that engine came from a Turkish bazaar.
00:08:25It was for you, my friend, special price. One extra cylinder, today only.
00:08:29Minimal revs.
00:08:31One and a half thousand, maybe upping it a bit.
00:08:36Oh, hang on.
00:08:41Come on, mate.
00:08:45He's failing. He's failing to topple me.
00:08:49Come on, you can pull an old spaniel off a pillar.
00:08:57Oh, no.
00:08:58Oh, no.
00:09:04All right.
00:09:05He's dragging you. He's taking you for a scrape.
00:09:12That's not old, really.
00:09:19Nice one, Hammond.
00:09:23The scores so far, then, looked like this.
00:09:27James had used 2,100 RPM to topple me.
00:09:33Whereas Hammond, despite his bigger engine, had had to use 3,600 RPM to bring down May.
00:09:42And now it's time for me to win as I get rid of the last of the country's hated dictators.
00:09:48Dick Pot.
00:10:01And there we are.
00:10:03Oh, now, come on!
00:10:05Well, you shouldn't have built a life-size one.
00:10:07You are a man of modest stature.
00:10:09Yeah, but it reflects my ego compared to yours.
00:10:12Well, it's, you know, proportional to the size of the tyranny.
00:10:14I don't think I'm going to need low range.
00:10:18You haven't got it.
00:10:19Well, I know exactly. I don't need it.
00:10:21Block the rear diff. There you go.
00:10:23You'll need that.
00:10:24Right, here we go. Ready?
00:10:25Mm-hm.
00:10:25Yes.
00:10:26Taking up the slack.
00:10:28There might be a really bad jolt, so be careful.
00:10:35I've won another test. I've won both of them.
00:10:39How have you worked that out?
00:10:40Well, 600 RPM, OK? And I did the best in the village.
00:10:44You destroyed the village.
00:10:46Listen, let's not get bogged down with that.
00:10:48We must now move on to what typically happens in a country after the dictator is gone.
00:11:03With the government in disarray, we had to load all our worldly goods into our pickup trucks
00:11:09and prepare to run for our lives.
00:11:12It's no time to be alphabet as high as in your record collection.
00:11:16I'm not. I'm just making sure that the Yes album and most prized possession is...
00:11:20Good. Well, get on with it.
00:11:21We're fleeing.
00:11:21OK, flee.
00:11:22I'd leave those.
00:11:23What?
00:11:34Everybody else in the world has an iPod.
00:11:38Look, I don't think you've got a gramophone for.
00:11:40It was my grandmother's. We're fleeing from rebel forces.
00:11:43You don't stand here doing a commentary. Get in your truck.
00:11:46I'm ready to flee.
00:11:47Right. Perfectly straightforward.
00:11:50Whichever one is the fastest from here to the flags there,
00:11:54Yes?
00:11:54Yes?
00:11:55Best at fleeing.
00:11:56Yes, they're called...
00:11:56Yes. Yes, exactly right.
00:11:57So it's a drag race.
00:11:58It's a flea race.
00:11:59It's a fleeing race.
00:12:00Let's flee then.
00:12:01Come on, let's go.
00:12:03If you need to flee from government forces, you need an Amarok. 0-68 seconds.
00:12:10That's hot hatchback territory.
00:12:13It's the fastest of the trio, the most powerful of the trio, and the lightest of the trio.
00:12:19Probably not now, but it was.
00:12:22I have the biggest engine, 3.2 litres, five cylinders, and not only is it strong enough to pull a
00:12:28train, literally, it's also the engine they use in the transit van.
00:12:32And those, as anyone who's ever been on a motorway knows, have a top speed of more than what you're
00:12:38in.
00:12:40Now we're alone, viewers, I will admit I'm not feeling entirely confident about this.
00:12:44The 2.3 litre engine in my Mercedes is very robust. It will last for a thousand years, but it's
00:12:51not what you'd call powerful.
00:12:52I think there might be a few aerodynamic issues as well.
00:12:54But anyway, I'm going to go in D on the basis that Mercedes knows better than me.
00:13:02Here we go. Here we go.
00:13:13Bit of a slow start for fleeing.
00:13:21Oh, I may have lost a couple of things.
00:13:28Oh, I've lost my bike.
00:13:30Look, I'm so hoping to have my bike available once I fled.
00:13:35Bit of buffeting, and I'm losing.
00:13:39Oh, and Jeremy's getting away.
00:13:44Storming ahead. I mean, storming.
00:13:49Oh, a lot of glass. There's glass everywhere.
00:13:56That is not a lot of braking area.
00:14:04Oh, oh, I've got it.
00:14:10Oh, my God.
00:14:18My Lego.
00:14:31Bicycle?
00:14:36This is our new life, Jack.
00:14:37This is it.
00:14:38Lego cream and a shit record.
00:14:41Well, you say that.
00:14:42I'm going to start again.
00:14:43I know we've got a chair.
00:14:44You say that.
00:14:45Oh, we're going to be all right.
00:14:46I literally think we're OK.
00:14:48Yes.
00:14:48So, let's just get this crystal clear.
00:14:50OK, we haven't escaped with much,
00:14:53but the Volkswagen has now won all three tests.
00:14:56Who decided that?
00:14:57Me.
00:14:58Yeah, but this isn't a dictatorship anymore.
00:15:00We topple the dictator.
00:15:01Yeah, it's a democracy.
00:15:02It was the fastest by a mile.
00:15:04Yeah, it is.
00:15:05It was easily the best at pulling over statues
00:15:08and the best at water irrigation.
00:15:11No.
00:15:11And you may have got there first, guaranteeing your survival,
00:15:14but you have no life.
00:15:16If you have half a table and a mattress
00:15:18and the worst album in history,
00:15:19I have got the contents of a home.
00:15:22The merits of the Yes album aside,
00:15:25the fact remained that with the country now in chaos,
00:15:28help is urgently needed.
00:15:39So, how would our commandeered trucks cope with their requirements?
00:15:51Quite well, actually.
00:16:05OK, we'll pick that up later on.
00:16:08Yes, but first, it is time to brim the tank of chat
00:16:12from the petrol station of debate
00:16:14on the corner of Conversation Street.
00:16:23APPLAUSE
00:16:29Now, there's been a lot of talk recently about electric cars,
00:16:32obviously, so we thought we ought to have some conversation about that.
00:16:35I'm going to kick it off, if I may, with the new Audi E-tron.
00:16:39Got a picture of it here.
00:16:40Sure, it's very nice.
00:16:42The only problem is, E-tron is the French word for turd.
00:16:46Is it?
00:16:47Hmm.
00:16:48Yes.
00:16:49They're not going to sell very many of those in France, I'm guessing.
00:16:52No, they probably won't.
00:16:53In the same way that Hyundai,
00:16:54who's just introduced a new car called the Kona,
00:16:57they're not going to be selling too many of those in Portugal.
00:16:59Boy, is Kona Portuguese for turd?
00:17:02No.
00:17:03What, then?
00:17:05It's the one word we can't say.
00:17:07LAUGHTER
00:17:09Mourinho.
00:17:10Yes.
00:17:10That's exactly what it is.
00:17:12Moving on.
00:17:13Yes.
00:17:13Have you seen those stories around, about Jaguar,
00:17:17possibly going over to making only electric cars?
00:17:19I have read that, yeah.
00:17:20All Jaguars would be electric, which is a worry,
00:17:22because potentially it'll make it a lot more difficult
00:17:24to hear your Jaguar-driving guest leave your house early in the morning
00:17:29with all of your silverware in the boot.
00:17:31Good point.
00:17:31Very good point.
00:17:32Oh, no, I've just taken all...
00:17:33Or they'll be turning up all hours of the day and night,
00:17:36just standing there.
00:17:37Well, I'm sorry, could I charge my car up your house?
00:17:39What a bottle of the electricity company over at mine.
00:17:42Put that in the wall.
00:17:43Yes, if you don't mine.
00:17:45No, but if we may be serious for a moment,
00:17:47the biggest problem is the electrical charging infrastructure
00:17:51in this country simply isn't good enough
00:17:54to sustain a great deal of demand.
00:17:58No, but it just isn't.
00:17:59Yeah, but it'll get better,
00:17:59and the vast majority of people simply recharge at night.
00:18:02That's what I do with mine.
00:18:03I know, but if you go on a long journey,
00:18:05you can't take your house with you.
00:18:06You've got to charge up somewhere else.
00:18:08Yes, but electric charging points
00:18:09are springing up everywhere at the moment.
00:18:11It's quite a rate.
00:18:12Yes, I agree.
00:18:13They are.
00:18:13They are.
00:18:14But look at it this way.
00:18:15OK, the second most boring thing a man can do
00:18:19is filling up with petrol.
00:18:20Second most after...
00:18:22Trying on trousers.
00:18:23Trying on trousers.
00:18:23We all agree that's the worst thing.
00:18:24It's just a fact.
00:18:25The second most boring thing you can do
00:18:26is fill up with petrol,
00:18:27which takes, what, three minutes?
00:18:29Yes.
00:18:29Charging a car up is, like, 40 minutes,
00:18:32and I haven't got time for that.
00:18:34No, but it's...
00:18:3540 minutes is getting...
00:18:36You can do it in less than that now,
00:18:37and it's getting shorter and shorter all the time.
00:18:39Charging times are plummeting.
00:18:41You've got to go into a service station
00:18:42surrounded by people with smelly bottoms
00:18:44all playing on those slot machines,
00:18:46and 40 minutes.
00:18:47Do you just think,
00:18:47I've got so much more I'd rather be doing than this?
00:18:50I only have, if I'm lucky,
00:18:54175,000 hours before I do dying,
00:18:56and I'm not going to waste any of them
00:18:58charging an electric car up.
00:18:59I'm just not.
00:19:01Now, sticking with electric cars,
00:19:02the iconic London black taxi has gone electric.
00:19:05We've got a picture of it here.
00:19:06There it is.
00:19:07I've ridden it.
00:19:08I've driven it as well, actually,
00:19:09and it's excellent.
00:19:10It's very, very smooth, very comfortable,
00:19:12and obviously, it's very quiet,
00:19:13which means you can hear the driver's views on immigration
00:19:16more clearly.
00:19:18Everybody always says,
00:19:19I'm sorry, I like black cabs.
00:19:20I use them all the time.
00:19:21Yeah, you really are a dinosaur.
00:19:23I just hate Uber.
00:19:24I hate Uber.
00:19:25How do you hate Uber?
00:19:26It just works.
00:19:27Have you seen how they drive?
00:19:29We're appalling,
00:19:30dithering about in the middle of junctions,
00:19:31and they don't know where they're going,
00:19:33and it's always a price,
00:19:34and I hate those commercials
00:19:36where they say,
00:19:37not all of our drivers are rapists.
00:19:39That's not really a slogan, is it?
00:19:42I'm sorry, I just,
00:19:42I will not get in with,
00:19:44and listen.
00:19:44I'm saying how many hours you've got left.
00:19:47I shall make it less.
00:19:48Look.
00:19:49A lot less.
00:19:50Yeah, I'm with him,
00:19:51and I like Uber.
00:19:52I like the fact that you get the alert
00:19:54that tells you who's coming to pick you up
00:19:56and what sort of car he's driving.
00:19:58What's the point?
00:19:59It's a price.
00:19:59It's always a price.
00:20:00It isn't always a price.
00:20:01I've got a friend,
00:20:02and she had one coming.
00:20:03This was just before Christmas,
00:20:04as it happened.
00:20:05The driver was from South America,
00:20:06and she got an alert,
00:20:07and it said,
00:20:08Jesus is arriving soon
00:20:10in a Honda Accord.
00:20:11Wow.
00:20:12Which is not what it says
00:20:13in the New Testament.
00:20:14No, it doesn't.
00:20:15Who knew?
00:20:16Anyway, look,
00:20:16there is a new version
00:20:17of the Bugatti Chiron.
00:20:18I've got a picture of it here.
00:20:19It's called the Chiron Sport,
00:20:21but that does make me wonder,
00:20:23what bit of the regular Chiron
00:20:24wasn't sporty?
00:20:26No, it was a sporty car anyway.
00:20:28It was quite sporty.
00:20:28I noticed that.
00:20:29Is that more powerful?
00:20:30Nope.
00:20:31But it is 18 kilograms lighter
00:20:33because it has carbon fiber
00:20:36windscreen wipers.
00:20:37What?
00:20:37That's all.
00:20:38What were the old ones made of?
00:20:40Cast iron.
00:20:42So it's 18 kilograms lighter?
00:20:44Mm-hmm.
00:20:45And how much is it?
00:20:45It's 2.3 million pounds.
00:20:49That's a lot, isn't it?
00:20:50The standard one's what?
00:20:502 million quid, isn't it?
00:20:52Well, I've just had a thought.
00:20:53What?
00:20:53If you're prone to going through life
00:20:55with quite a heavy briefcase,
00:20:57if you bought the ordinary Chiron
00:20:58left your briefcase at home,
00:21:00you've automatically created
00:21:01the sport, haven't you?
00:21:03Yeah.
00:21:03And saved yourself 300,000 pounds.
00:21:05That, that is good advice.
00:21:08Yeah.
00:21:08A lot of people here
00:21:09will be taking that away with them
00:21:10and using it.
00:21:11That's consumer advice.
00:21:12Exactly.
00:21:13All part of the service.
00:21:14We're here for you.
00:21:15Can I move it on?
00:21:16I have some interesting conversation.
00:21:18Oh, good.
00:21:18There is a man in Canada
00:21:19who has successfully lowered
00:21:21his car insurance premium
00:21:22by declaring himself to be
00:21:24a woman.
00:21:25Now, he hasn't had the operation.
00:21:27He hasn't swapped his beef torpedo
00:21:29for the silken purse.
00:21:30He has merely...
00:21:31Thank you, Doctor.
00:21:32Take care.
00:21:35He has merely taken advantage...
00:21:36He just said beef torpedo, didn't he?
00:21:39...of a loophole in the law
00:21:40that allows you to change your gender.
00:21:43Torpedo?
00:21:44You actually claim you've called a torpedo?
00:21:46Everybody calls it that.
00:21:48A spearfish.
00:21:49He rides into it.
00:21:50Listen, listen.
00:21:51There's a lot of this about...
00:21:52I mean, there was a chap the other day
00:21:53sentenced to some considerable jail time
00:21:55and as he was sentenced,
00:21:56he went,
00:21:57oh, I've just remembered I'm a woman
00:21:58and can I go to a lady prison
00:22:00and preferably one of those
00:22:01like you see on the internet.
00:22:02Yeah, and it worked.
00:22:03It worked.
00:22:04They sent him to a lady prison.
00:22:05Well, sure enough,
00:22:06he's been quite badly behaved.
00:22:07Yeah, I mean, chaps,
00:22:08I wouldn't advise trying it
00:22:09down your local swimming bath,
00:22:10swaggering into the changing rooms.
00:22:12Morning.
00:22:12Morning, ladies.
00:22:13I'm a lady as well,
00:22:14just like you and you.
00:22:16Hang up my suit and my tie there
00:22:17and I'll go and take a shower
00:22:18with all the rest of the...
00:22:19Oh, my Lord,
00:22:20my vagina's gone all stiff.
00:22:21Look at that.
00:22:23It's a tricky and obviously
00:22:25sensitive area,
00:22:26but my advice is
00:22:27if you want to lower
00:22:28your car insurance premium,
00:22:29don't walk into this minefield
00:22:30of whether or not
00:22:31you can declare yourself
00:22:32to be a woman.
00:22:33Simply declare yourself
00:22:34to be a vicar.
00:22:35That's a good idea
00:22:36because they do have
00:22:37cheap insurance, don't they?
00:22:38They do have very cheap
00:22:39car insurance
00:22:39and if you're a vicar,
00:22:41you can still wear a dress.
00:22:42Yeah.
00:22:42So everybody wins.
00:22:43Everybody wins.
00:22:44More consumer advice.
00:22:45Oh, now, you know, Morgan?
00:22:48I do.
00:22:49OK, they've got a serious problem
00:22:51because they make the frames
00:22:52of their cars out of ash.
00:22:54Now, all the ash trees in Britain
00:22:56have either died
00:22:57or are dying.
00:22:58So Morgan is going to have
00:23:00to import its ash
00:23:01from abroad.
00:23:03What?
00:23:04Foreign wood.
00:23:05Foreign wood in a Morgan?
00:23:06I know.
00:23:07And it may be German.
00:23:09Oh, good God.
00:23:10German wood in a Morgan.
00:23:11No, that's just not possible.
00:23:12German wood.
00:23:13That can't be done.
00:23:14That's probably why
00:23:15because of this immense problem.
00:23:17They've decided to branch out.
00:23:19What are they doing?
00:23:20Well, they're going to start
00:23:21making bicycles.
00:23:22Are they made of wood?
00:23:23Well, yes, we've got a picture here.
00:23:24They are, actually.
00:23:25The mudguard and the chainguard
00:23:26is both made of wood.
00:23:28Really?
00:23:28Yeah.
00:23:29Oh, they're really roaring
00:23:30into the future, Morgan.
00:23:31What are they doing next?
00:23:32Is it a dugout canoe?
00:23:33Well, now, it's interesting
00:23:34you should say that.
00:23:34It's not a dugout canoe.
00:23:36It is.
00:23:36And this is a big surprise
00:23:37for Morgan.
00:23:38They're making haircare products.
00:23:40What?
00:23:40What?
00:23:41They absolutely are
00:23:42making haircare products.
00:23:44I've actually got the blurb
00:23:45about it here.
00:23:46This is actually
00:23:47from Morgan's website.
00:23:48Well, as they call it.
00:23:50They have...
00:23:51They call it the electric computer.
00:23:52I was going to say,
00:23:53they have a website.
00:23:54OK, this is describing
00:23:55their new hair products,
00:23:57quintessentially British.
00:23:58Oh.
00:23:58The lotion was originally created
00:24:01to enable a gentleman
00:24:02to hold not only
00:24:03the racing line
00:24:04but also his hairstyle.
00:24:05Oh, lovely.
00:24:07So, Morgan's most stylish owners,
00:24:10there's no such thing
00:24:11as a stylish Morgan owner,
00:24:13can once again
00:24:13take to the roads
00:24:14of confidence
00:24:15that their dapper crefure
00:24:16will hold
00:24:17throughout the journey.
00:24:19Can I ask something,
00:24:20actually,
00:24:21while we're on the subject?
00:24:21Why is it that
00:24:22everything in the world
00:24:23has a name,
00:24:24like cups,
00:24:25spectacles,
00:24:26Jeremy Clarkson's
00:24:27cardigan,
00:24:27but anything you put
00:24:28in your hair
00:24:29is just called product.
00:24:30Oh, you don't get that.
00:24:31You go to the barber
00:24:32and he says,
00:24:32would you like product?
00:24:33You think, no,
00:24:33because it might be HP sauce.
00:24:35I mean, that's a product.
00:24:36It's a bit vague.
00:24:37They could tarmac your hair.
00:24:38It's a product.
00:24:39I mean,
00:24:40molten aluminium
00:24:40is a product.
00:24:41It is.
00:24:42Swartiga is a product.
00:24:44I'm not sure
00:24:45that Morgan actually
00:24:46understands its customers
00:24:47very well
00:24:48with this plan.
00:24:49What, you're saying
00:24:49that the typical Morgan
00:24:51customer wouldn't
00:24:52traditionally...
00:24:53Oh, yeah, look,
00:24:53they're not haircare
00:24:54products kind of people.
00:24:54But let's just work this out.
00:24:55Come on, you...
00:24:57you have a Morgan
00:24:59and...
00:25:00Um...
00:25:01Actually...
00:25:01I'm...
00:25:02Actually, on the subject
00:25:03of that,
00:25:04can you just talk
00:25:04among yourselves?
00:25:05No, seriously,
00:25:06James May,
00:25:07I want to check
00:25:08something out with you.
00:25:09Just if I may.
00:25:11Just hang on a minute.
00:25:12What are you doing?
00:25:13Well,
00:25:14thing is,
00:25:15okay,
00:25:15you say that you
00:25:17don't wear...
00:25:18Oh, I'm uncomfortable
00:25:19with whatever's happening.
00:25:20You will be.
00:25:21I took this photograph
00:25:22just last week,
00:25:23okay,
00:25:24I put an arrow on it
00:25:24to show what I'm on about.
00:25:25That's Richard Hammond.
00:25:26Sporting.
00:25:26I'm going to zoom in.
00:25:27Some grey hairs there, yeah?
00:25:28A couple of grey hairs.
00:25:30You see those?
00:25:31Yes?
00:25:32Now, when I came to work
00:25:33this morning...
00:25:34They're still there!
00:25:36My wife has cut my hair.
00:25:38They'll still be...
00:25:38They're not...
00:25:39James May,
00:25:40they're not there!
00:25:41They're not there!
00:25:42They're not there!
00:25:43Come in really close.
00:25:44They're still there.
00:25:45Let me arbitrate independently.
00:25:47They're not there!
00:25:48They're not there!
00:25:50I've never...
00:25:50You've been using
00:25:51Morgan product!
00:25:53I've never...
00:25:54I've died...
00:25:54Oh, God!
00:25:56Would you like to stop
00:25:58doing Conversation Street now?
00:25:59I'd so like to do...
00:26:00If you want to feed me
00:26:01into a giant blender,
00:26:03I prefer that.
00:26:04Right,
00:26:04that is the end
00:26:05of Conversation Street.
00:26:06And now,
00:26:07if I may,
00:26:08I'd like to talk about
00:26:08the Jaguar XE,
00:26:10not your hair.
00:26:11It is a really
00:26:12very nice little car,
00:26:14if I'm honest.
00:26:15It's very good looking.
00:26:16It's not particularly
00:26:17expensive.
00:26:18It rides beautifully,
00:26:20very beautifully,
00:26:21in fact.
00:26:22And as a result
00:26:22of all that,
00:26:23people ignore it
00:26:24and buy a BMW
00:26:25instead.
00:26:26So,
00:26:27Jaguar went to
00:26:28its Skunk Works,
00:26:29which is based
00:26:29in a shed,
00:26:30and they said,
00:26:31could you make
00:26:32a fast version?
00:26:33One that will get
00:26:34everybody talking.
00:26:44The standard low-cost
00:26:46procedure for turning
00:26:47a normal saloon
00:26:48into a sports saloon
00:26:50is to give it
00:26:51some fat tyres,
00:26:52a nice V6 engine,
00:26:57and maybe
00:26:58some bucket seats.
00:27:01But,
00:27:02the boffins at Jag
00:27:03decided to go
00:27:04a bit further
00:27:06than that.
00:27:17welcome everyone
00:27:18to what's called
00:27:20the Project 8.
00:27:35The first thing
00:27:36you need to know
00:27:37is that the only bits
00:27:38that these two cars
00:27:39have in common
00:27:40are the roof
00:27:42and the front doors.
00:27:45Everything else
00:27:46is changed
00:27:47for some very good reasons.
00:27:52First of all,
00:27:53they decided
00:27:53they needed
00:27:54carbon ceramic brakes
00:27:55that were much bigger
00:27:56than the brakes
00:27:57on the standard car.
00:27:58Now, that meant
00:27:59they needed bigger wheels
00:28:01to go round the brakes,
00:28:02and bigger wheels
00:28:03wouldn't fit
00:28:04in these arches.
00:28:06So, they had to redesign
00:28:08the whole front
00:28:09of the car,
00:28:10the headlamps,
00:28:10everything.
00:28:14Then, there was
00:28:15the track,
00:28:16the gap between
00:28:17the wheels,
00:28:17front and back.
00:28:18They decided
00:28:19they'd like that
00:28:20to be wider.
00:28:21That meant fitting
00:28:22flared wheel arches.
00:28:23So, that meant
00:28:24a new panel here
00:28:25and here
00:28:26and a new back door
00:28:28and a new panel
00:28:29here and here.
00:28:34Then came the engine.
00:28:36They decided
00:28:37they didn't want
00:28:38to mess about
00:28:39and that they'd use
00:28:40a 5-litre
00:28:42supercharged V8.
00:28:43But that wouldn't fit.
00:28:45So, to get it in,
00:28:46they had to cut away
00:28:47at the bulkhead.
00:28:48And then,
00:28:48when it was in place,
00:28:49they thought,
00:28:50wait a minute,
00:28:51that's all a bit heavy.
00:28:52So, we need to save
00:28:53some weight
00:28:54at the front of the car.
00:28:55So, the bonnet,
00:28:56as you can see here,
00:28:57is carbon fibre
00:28:58and so are the front wings
00:28:59and so is all this.
00:29:09Suspension?
00:29:10Oh, yes,
00:29:11that was changed as well.
00:29:12It now has
00:29:13Bilstein dampers
00:29:14that cost
00:29:15£1,000 each.
00:29:17And rose joints
00:29:19and ceramic wheel bearings
00:29:21like you get
00:29:22on a race car.
00:29:27On top of all that,
00:29:28the 8-speed gearbox
00:29:30also needed beefing up
00:29:32and so did
00:29:33the four-wheel drive system.
00:29:35And then,
00:29:36they had to get rid
00:29:37of the spare wheel
00:29:38and the well
00:29:39in which it sits
00:29:40to fit some
00:29:41underfloor aerodynamics.
00:29:44And then,
00:29:45when they added up
00:29:46the cost of all the work
00:29:47they'd done,
00:29:47there was a problem.
00:29:49In order to make
00:29:50any money at all,
00:29:51the Project 8
00:29:52would have to cost
00:29:55£150,000.
00:29:58That's four times more
00:30:00than the standard car.
00:30:02Four!
00:30:07So,
00:30:08here's the question.
00:30:10How mad would you have to be
00:30:12to spend £150,000
00:30:14on a car that was designed
00:30:18and built
00:30:18in a glorified shed
00:30:20in the Midlands
00:30:21in about 18 months?
00:30:26And the simple answer is
00:30:29not mad at all
00:30:30because this car
00:30:31is fan-bleeding-tastic.
00:30:40The engine may be
00:30:4210 years old
00:30:43but it has a huge amount
00:30:45of character
00:30:47and 9 on 600 horsepower.
00:30:52That means 0-60
00:30:54in 3.3 seconds
00:30:58at a top speed
00:30:59of 200.
00:31:02Even more impressive,
00:31:0410 minutes
00:31:05before the Nürburgring
00:31:08shut its doors
00:31:09for the winter.
00:31:10Jag's Project 8 engineers
00:31:13asked if they could have
00:31:14one last go round it
00:31:16and they shattered the record
00:31:19for four-door saloons
00:31:21with a time
00:31:21of 7 minutes
00:31:2321 seconds.
00:31:27That's blisteringly quick.
00:31:35I will say
00:31:36that if you've got
00:31:37the car manually
00:31:38hunkered down
00:31:39and it's in track mode
00:31:40and the traction control
00:31:42is turned off,
00:31:44things can go a bit
00:31:45violent and bloody
00:31:48if you go
00:31:50beyond the limit.
00:32:03The answer
00:32:04is to stay
00:32:05within the limits
00:32:06and in this car
00:32:07that's no hardship.
00:32:12The grip
00:32:13from the four-wheel drive
00:32:15system
00:32:16and the wider
00:32:16track
00:32:17and the Michelin
00:32:18Cup tyres
00:32:19absolutely wobbles
00:32:22your eyes.
00:32:22It's phenomenal.
00:32:27You can corner
00:32:28at speeds
00:32:29that you simply
00:32:31can't quite believe.
00:32:32I mean,
00:32:33that is...
00:32:34What's 140 kilometers
00:32:36through there?
00:32:41Look at that.
00:32:42That's just sheer grip.
00:32:45Actually peeled
00:32:46my skin,
00:32:47that did.
00:32:58I am a sucker
00:33:00for small
00:33:00front-engine
00:33:02sports saloons.
00:33:04I had a Mercedes
00:33:05CLK Black
00:33:07and this
00:33:08is better than that.
00:33:10This is better
00:33:11than even the hottest
00:33:12BMW M3.
00:33:16You can whisper this
00:33:18but I reckon
00:33:18it's even better
00:33:19than Alpha's Quadrifogio.
00:33:32This is very good.
00:33:36Really, really good.
00:33:39But
00:33:40is it a jag?
00:33:44Well, you can have it
00:33:45with scaffolding
00:33:47in the back
00:33:47but this one
00:33:48has two proper seats
00:33:49and in here
00:33:51it has enough space
00:33:53for a borrowed oil painting
00:33:55and all the kit
00:33:57that you need
00:33:58to go out at night
00:33:59and borrow another one.
00:34:01So, yes,
00:34:02it is a jag.
00:34:04It even says
00:34:05prototype vehicle on it
00:34:06which means you don't have
00:34:07to pay any tax
00:34:08like my prototype
00:34:09watch and trousers
00:34:10and this prototype camera
00:34:11we're using today.
00:34:14And there's more.
00:34:17At normal road speeds
00:34:19with the car in comfort
00:34:21or even dynamic mode
00:34:22it's as quiet
00:34:24and as civilized
00:34:25as it should be.
00:34:28It even has
00:34:29little springs
00:34:30sitting on top
00:34:31of the bigger springs
00:34:32to give you
00:34:33a more comfortable ride
00:34:34but everything's relative
00:34:36really.
00:34:37I mean
00:34:37it's not as comfortable
00:34:39say as
00:34:39lying in a hammock
00:34:41on a summer's day
00:34:42listening to wood pigeons
00:34:44but it does have
00:34:46air conditioning
00:34:46and a head-up display
00:34:47and electric seats
00:34:48so
00:34:49it is more comfortable
00:34:51than you'd expect.
00:34:56In fact
00:34:57it's better than you'd expect
00:34:58in every way.
00:35:01and maybe
00:35:02we shouldn't be surprised
00:35:03by that
00:35:04because the last time
00:35:05something was designed
00:35:06and built quickly
00:35:07in a glorified shed
00:35:09in the Midlands
00:35:10it was called
00:35:11the Spitfire
00:35:12and it won
00:35:13the Battle of Breddy.
00:35:23And we've got this
00:35:24we've got the paper
00:35:25and three
00:35:26two
00:35:27one
00:35:28Q James May.
00:35:30ready
00:35:31hang on
00:35:32hang on
00:35:32hang on
00:35:33hang on
00:35:33hang on
00:35:34the Spitfire
00:35:35yes
00:35:36it was the Hurricane
00:35:36that won the Battle of Britain
00:35:38well it just wasn't
00:35:39no it just was
00:35:40there were far more of them
00:35:41it was easier to build
00:35:42it was easier to repair
00:35:43it was easier to fly
00:35:45it was
00:35:45but that's like saying
00:35:46that a Nissan Juke
00:35:47is better than a Lamborghini
00:35:49Aventador
00:35:49because it's easier to build
00:35:50and there are more of them
00:35:51no it's not like that at all
00:35:53it is
00:35:53the Hurricane
00:35:53was a much more stable
00:35:54gun platform
00:35:55in the hands of a novel
00:35:56the Hurricane
00:35:56accounted for more enemy aircraft
00:35:58than all of our other air defences combined
00:36:00it won
00:36:01but the Spitfire
00:36:03okay the Spitfire
00:36:04looked glamorous
00:36:05so you'd look up from the sky
00:36:06and then that improved morale
00:36:08on the ground
00:36:08because people are going
00:36:09oh wow look at that
00:36:10we can't possibly lose this
00:36:11yes but morale didn't shoot down
00:36:12enemy aircraft
00:36:13it Hurricanes did
00:36:14that simply a fact
00:36:15you've got a small boy
00:36:16looking out the window
00:36:16wow look there's a Spitfire up there
00:36:19and I'm going to join the RAF
00:36:20and that's what we need
00:36:21he didn't want to fly a Hurricane
00:36:22because it looked like a sad Basset Hound
00:36:24no it did look like a sad Basset
00:36:25and anyway the best the best fighter aircraft of world war ii was the Messerschmitt 109
00:36:29everybody
00:36:30well that didn't win the battle of britain did it
00:36:31well to be honest nobody won the battle of britain it was a draw
00:36:34what have you got that from
00:36:36what the chaps
00:36:37what the chaps
00:36:38what the chaps
00:36:39i hate to make this whole thing sound like i don't know a car show
00:36:44but can we get it back to the jag a bit
00:36:46yes because i don't want to talk to him any more about aeroplanes
00:36:49okay remember the jag
00:36:51yes is it a mainstream car
00:36:53no no if i'm honest it isn't they've only made 300 of them
00:36:56and they're all left-hand drive
00:36:58what so they went to all that time and trouble to develop
00:37:00and expense yeah
00:37:01and now they're only building a handful and they put the steering wheel on the wrong side
00:37:04no it is it is very odd but since i don't want to listen to him talking about hurricanes anymore
00:37:09i do think we should find out how fast it goes around the ebola drone
00:37:14and she's off in a cloud of v8 crackle and fury and immediately onto the isn't straight
00:37:22twitchy with a change of line but she's got it under control
00:37:25using every one of the 592 horsepowers
00:37:34a bit of tire squeal as she swings down into your name here
00:37:38right hard on the brakes down the eight-speed box
00:37:42more tire squeal from those super sticky michelins
00:37:46and clearly they are working well right back on the power now for the full chat sprint down the isn't
00:37:56okay more hard braking soon for the flick into the tricky complex at old lady's house
00:38:04four-wheel drive keeping it clinging on now spearing down the bumpy bits towards substation
00:38:12good noise that well a lot of tire squeal through there but just feel the sheet to go
00:38:19pitches it into a drift nicely done and across the line
00:38:23it looks like that it's got that darky feel
00:38:26it looks like a race back
00:38:27it does
00:38:28it's the best of it's the only thing that whole valet drives on the road because it's all like that
00:38:32anyway uh that's the top 10 of our leaderboard and there's the jag waiting to see where it goes
00:38:38on or does it indeed get onto that list at all let's find out let's move it up
00:38:43oh hang on a minute it's faster than the gt3rs good god to me that is a really properly good
00:38:51car
00:38:51that it is the spitfire of cars hurricane don't leave it hold hold leave it hold hold hold steady
00:38:59and relax and carry on tonight we are finding out is this right tonight we are finding out how the
00:39:08new breed of european pickup trucks would fare in the developing world and we've learned that the
00:39:14volkswagen is the best of the lot no we didn't learn that well we did it was the fastest it
00:39:20was the most
00:39:20powerful yeah but that's not actually terribly relevant if you're in a country where there are
00:39:24more ak-47s than ambulances is yes whatever okay whatever so far we've seen what happens when the peace
00:39:31ends and the dictator is toppled and chaos ensues and now we pick up the story with what typically
00:39:37happens after that okay here's the situation there's a power vacuum now foreign armies are pouring
00:39:54in and it's our job to get this fuel to the nation's helicopter and then the villagers can be strafed
00:40:03really that's what happens to that end we have got to go from here to this forward operating base
00:40:14and the first one there is the winner
00:40:17me then having saddled up we waited for the sound to charge
00:40:27and then naturally all set off in different directions
00:40:34yeah yeah if i go through here oh yeah i am racing a pickup truck off road in wales to
00:40:43refuel a
00:40:44helicopter down here and right this test if you think about it it is rather pertinent that we are
00:40:50filming this in the uk because a couple of years when brexit has really caught up with us
00:40:56there will be a civil war and you will need pickup trucks to survive
00:41:01i think if i can get through this gap in the wall i save having to drive all the way
00:41:06around the end of
00:41:12this is it there i have a compass this is a piece of cake
00:41:21it can take some punishment this thing that's what you want utility it's like jack reaches trousers
00:41:29they're just some trousers this is just some pickup sadly for me the amoroc wasn't wearing jack reaches trousers
00:41:42come on climb
00:41:47climb you stupid car
00:41:50right i reckon past here oh hello mr hammond oh we ended up in the same place right let's see
00:42:01what you
00:42:01got uphill come on no why is his car doing this i'm not why is that possible
00:42:14come on it's not getting up that hill not in a million years
00:42:21he's got better tires that's what that is all about
00:42:27whatever the issue i had to find a flatter route come on come on must win this must win
00:42:36i don't think that this amoroc is really designed for freedom fighters in africa in the middle east
00:42:44i think it's aimed more at surveyors in england i mean it's got a laptop charging
00:42:49points here and a leather steering wheel i'm sure you need that kind of thing in mogadishin
00:42:57need to go west west south west for a bit but avoiding that clump of trees
00:43:05what is this
00:43:12shrugs it off it's hammond he's going completely the wrong way
00:43:19wrong way james going the other way is a very comforting sight it means you're going the right way
00:43:28in the amoroc i was still searching for another route right oh
00:43:33i think i'm on a golf course which way do i go
00:43:41maybe if i drove around faster i could work it out
00:43:49yes this way here we go all cleared up now
00:43:57meanwhile in the mercedes i was making excellent progress
00:44:02i've got this fantastic 360 degree camera system in here so when i'm doing a tricky bit like this
00:44:07i can turn the knob and look down each side i can look down the right wheel down the left
00:44:11wheel down the front
00:44:15absolutely no excuse for hitting anything easy i haven't grounded out once doing this
00:44:27um meanwhile i just realized that for once in his life james had actually been going
00:44:32in the right direction okay i am lost i think it was that way
00:44:39we'll go this way all right let's see what you got come on i cannot lose this race
00:44:52oh
00:44:55oh bit of a bump
00:44:58with the others far behind i found a rough track that led to the forward operating base
00:45:08buffeting
00:45:10oh that's a big hole
00:45:12and jeremy and i were also heading in the right direction
00:45:20on a route that was longer but faster
00:45:26big one
00:45:31this is cracking along this thing
00:45:40yes
00:45:43on the fast track the amarok was starting to come good
00:45:49this is quick very quick
00:45:52even with 100 gallons of gas in the van
00:45:58whoa hang on
00:46:01even though the merc was the only one with coil springs life on the rough track was very uncomfortable
00:46:11bogs
00:46:14whoa
00:46:16and then
00:46:19bollocks
00:46:22that is
00:46:23that is a complete dead end
00:46:25i've wasted my time i'm gonna have to go back
00:46:29can't turn around there oh god
00:46:32or there
00:46:34this is losing me vital time
00:46:42on the faster route the powerful amarok was starting to reign in the ford
00:46:49right hammond i'm coming to get you
00:46:52he's toast
00:46:55i don't think so my friend no way
00:47:01come on amarok
00:47:08get him get him kill him
00:47:11i want the medal i want to deliver the fuel
00:47:17no way you're not coming through oh no
00:47:22yeah he's crossed up come on jerry get him get him get him
00:47:26no no no
00:47:32i'm now in the lead i'm doing winning
00:47:36no disaster
00:47:45no that's the compound damn it there's the helicopter and once again the amarok is victorious
00:48:08is that barrel gonna
00:48:22what on earth
00:48:26i'm probably not gonna get my freedom fighter badge now am i for that
00:48:30what happened
00:48:32well him
00:48:33and any minute now he's gonna claim he won this one as well
00:48:36he did win it oh yeah looks it that looks like success
00:48:40we were told to deliver fuel we weren't told to detonate the nation's helicopter look at it
00:48:48what is the budget for our show smaller than it was yeah not not big enough
00:48:52it's quite that's an expensive thing it's a helicopter there are no cheap helicopters
00:48:57apart from that one now
00:49:00it's beyond useless isn't it it's something else
00:49:03oh don't pat it it's a good truck
00:49:06if you have to have a pickup truck at a time of strife in your country this is proving to
00:49:10be the
00:49:10winner at everything i may have prevented the war how have you prevented the war well the
00:49:16helicopter was there to stop the war by strafing the uprising villagers and now it can't do that no
00:49:21so now the whole thing is going to descend into civil war and chaos
00:49:34it is inevitable in the developing world that one day all pickup trucks end up being used as gun
00:49:41platforms yeah it's their destiny to die on the battlefield yeah i mean every day you turn on the
00:49:46news and there's somebody standing in the back of a toyota or a nissan shooting at someone in a humvee
00:49:52or a land rover and what we want to know is how good will our european trucks be at that
00:49:57yeah and
00:49:58most importantly which one is best to find out each of our pickups would be driven through a ruined
00:50:05town by a freedom fighter
00:50:10whilst we stood on the back shooting at various targets these included some big barn doors a whole
00:50:18bus and the selection of cardboard soldiers james volunteered to go first but there seemed to be
00:50:26a bit of a problem why don't you why don't you set off well i'm just i'm just doing a
00:50:33small repair
00:50:34what are you repairing well when the barrels were in it slightly bowed out the sides and as a result
00:50:40of
00:50:41that this won't stay shut which is a bit hazardous that looks shut but you go over a bump and
00:50:46that
00:50:47latch you can you see how that doesn't line up so you've misused your pickup by using it as a
00:50:50pickup
00:50:50i'm sorry there's more to it than that this is supposed to be a nissan and a mercedes
00:50:56the world's most durable thing and it's got a flexible back end it's rubbish that is actually genuinely
00:51:03rubbish whilst i secured the tailgate jeremy loaded up my ak-47 i'll put it down carefully in case i'll
00:51:13break your pickup truck with it and then i was ready to deploy you can go ride out to glory
00:51:21look at him
00:51:23the soldier of fortune dogs of war the spaniel of war is what it is
00:51:32oh this is quite difficult even though i've got the car with the most sophisticated suspension
00:51:37i've got a slightly slippery floor i'm looking for a barn door there it is
00:51:48they make this look a lot easier in black or gang there's a bus
00:52:01oh having somehow managed to miss a whole bus i started to look for the cardboard soldiers
00:52:07die cardboard cutout
00:52:24come on barm door i'm ready for you
00:52:30take this barm door
00:52:33rambo may had missed all the barn doors all of the bus and all of the soldiers so with a
00:52:40score
00:52:40of zero to beat arnold hammond and eggo was feeling very confident stand up i am standing up
00:52:51he loves that
00:52:55so
00:52:57welcome to richard hammond's usual weekend
00:53:00oh wait is that a bar door
00:53:06oh a bush got in the way that's all that happened then
00:53:10boss big target oh about bullets
00:53:18oh
00:53:25bugger
00:53:27boy target
00:53:30oh jam
00:53:33okay all the buddies stop
00:53:36oh
00:53:38shit
00:53:40right i'm gonna try and make up for this now on the last target pinpoint shooting
00:53:46barn doors target acquired
00:53:49oh no no not now i've jammed my gun
00:53:53oh bollocks
00:53:59i had a bit of gun trouble i'll not lie
00:54:01well here's some more news yes general stonewall clarkson has gone off to get ready but i
00:54:07suddenly remembered remember when we were in jordan yeah he can't fire automatic rifles
00:54:12do you remember because it's it's it's crossed over isn't he yeah he's right-handed yeah but left
00:54:18eyed yeah so he shoots from his left side exactly he's diagonal which means all the spent
00:54:23cartridges burn his arm exactly well he'll be using a pistol won't he he always uses a pistol
00:54:29actually i wasn't using a pistol
00:54:35that's what i've got a 50 cal lock and load
00:54:40yes bomb door bomb door coming into view
00:54:52oh god i may have i've missed what yeah i've missed the door i'm there badly
00:54:58searching for targets there's a bus around here somewhere there it is
00:55:03oh i can't get on it i can't get on it i can't get on the bus opening fire
00:55:11oh i think i hit that but i've done that wrong
00:55:14men on the bridge lock and load i'll say it again die
00:55:37oh maybe i'm getting a bit it's the leaf springs bad mark for volkswagen there this
00:55:44jiggliness right here we go men die
00:55:54die oh god after this i got a bit carried away
00:56:12die oh god i'm gonna be in trouble for that one i've done that very wrong there look
00:56:20i've just noticed something it's got sights it's not just guesswork that's useful
00:56:26it's not just guesswork that's useful right bomb door here we go
00:56:30right bomb door here we go
00:56:37bomb door here we go
00:56:46bomb door here we go
00:57:01yes another victory how would you work that out and i hate to tell you this but you haven't hit
00:57:08the
00:57:08doors which were the target how do you know i haven't hit the doors because there's no well
00:57:18well on that terrible disappointment for him time to go back to the tent
00:57:30don't clap don't clap he killed a man you jammed an ak-47 well it's heated that's because you were
00:57:39firing it into the air pointlessly when you set off that's what they're for weddings funerals exam results
00:57:45you go outside fire 8k in the air it's it's a joyous thing they are the party popper of the
00:57:51developing world
00:57:55so never mind all that i have the the scores this is jeremy clarkson you fired
00:58:00two thousand six hundred rounds and the number of targets you hit was one
00:58:09you laugh but it's one more than him uh it is one more than you so i'm winning wait so
00:58:14hang on it all
00:58:15boils down to uh how many targets i hit yes but you had a roll bar to hang on to
00:58:19i did yep yep he did
00:58:20and he scored yes naught he really got nothing yep that's it okay so after all of that what is
00:58:28our
00:58:29conclusion gentlemen can we do a sensible one yeah see the thing is that mercedes nissan you had it did
00:58:34have a wobbly back end and i just don't think that's good enough actually in a pickup truck i really
00:58:38don't
00:58:39the volkswagen is very good but pickup trucks are working tools and it's just a bit too posh you
00:58:45wouldn't want to get into it in muddy boots so i don't think that will work so it's the ford
00:58:49then it's
00:58:49the cheapest it is the cheapest and it's i think the best looking and it is actually the one i'd
00:58:54have you'd have the ford yeah so we both yeah we'd have the ford james what would you have i
00:58:59wouldn't
00:58:59have a pickup truck yes i know but in in this test of pickup trucks which one would you have
00:59:05which
00:59:05you're going for none of them i wouldn't have one no i know but we're testing pickups so which
00:59:09which pickup truck of the three would you have i wouldn't have a pickup truck i've just spent i don't
00:59:14know 20 minutes reviewing these pickup trucks the ladies and gentlemen would like to know which is
00:59:18this yes i've come to a conclusion on behalf of the ladies and gentlemen which is don't have a
00:59:22pickup truck james you have a powerful imagination use it let's pretend okay come with me on a journey
00:59:29we'll warm your imagination imagine you're an eagle okay visualize that you're flying over mountains
00:59:36can you feel it can you feel the wind in your feathers it's beautiful isn't it yeah okay now imagine
00:59:43you've got a pickup truck which one is it why would an eagle have a pickup no no i mean
00:59:48imagine
00:59:49okay let's let's okay imagine james may a pastoral scene you got it there's like rolling grassy hills
00:59:57few sheep around you're a farmer you're walking around with your dog at your heel there sheep all
01:00:01around you can i have beethoven play beethoven is playing obviously live there's an old five-bar gate
01:00:08there an old oak tree arches over the gate and under the oak tree is your farmer's pickup truck which
01:00:14one is it it's not there i wouldn't have a because i wouldn't have a pickup truck now this is
01:00:19anybody
01:00:19else even in your imagination my imagination does not admit a pickup truck i'm not being stubborn i know
01:00:26my mind yes and what i know is that you've wasted so much time not choosing a pickup truck and
01:00:34claiming that
01:00:34the battle of britain was a draw that we don't have time for the big celebrity duel between
01:00:40adrian charles and howard from the halifax ads oh no exactly then on that terrible disappointment
01:00:47we must end thank you so much for watching good night
01:00:50so
01:01:05so
01:01:07so
01:01:07so
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