- 2 hours ago
Phineas And Ferb - Season 5 - Episode 05: Dry Another Day
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TVTranscript
00:00There's another hundred and four days of summer vacation, and school comes along just to end it.
00:07So the annual problem for our generation is finding a good way to spend it.
00:13Like babies!
00:14Building a rocket, or fighting a mummy, or climbing up the Eiffel Tower.
00:19Discovering something that doesn't exist, or giving a monkey a shower.
00:25Surfing tidal waves, creating nanobots, or locating Frankenstein's brain.
00:30Finding a dodo bird, painting a continent, or driving our sister insane.
00:35Phineas!
00:36As you can see, there's a whole lot of stuff to do before school starts this fall.
00:40Come on, Perry!
00:41So stick with us, cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all!
00:46So stick with us, cause Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all!
00:51Mom! Phineas and Ferb are making a title sequence!
01:00Don't worry, little fella. It's just your annual vet visit. Plus, the harmonica music's probably not helping.
01:09Candace, you don't usually come to these vet appointments.
01:11What do you mean? He's a member of our family. Of course I'm concerned with his health stuff.
01:15Oh look, there's a slushy dog! Gotta go! Bye!
01:18Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy, Jeremy!
01:23Jeremy's working there today.
01:25That tracks.
01:28Whoa! This place is packed!
01:30This chipping day brought in way too many people!
01:33We're swamped!
01:34When can we see the doctor? My Rinaldo has waiting room anxiety!
01:38Oh my gosh, your leg!
01:39Oh, that's just his denim scratching, folks!
01:42Hercules' appointment was an hour ago. We're gonna be late for the groomers.
01:45Me too!
01:46Us too! Them too!
01:47My Petunia's just fine waiting.
01:50But Petunia too wants her free chipping and she wants it now!
01:55I'm so sorry, folks, but if you'll be patient, the vet will see everyone as quickly as she can.
02:00That's not critical!
02:02If only these people had something to do while they wait.
02:05Oh, Rinaldo, I know brushing soothes you. I'm so sorry Daddy forgot your brush.
02:10Hmm, I'm formulating a plan. I know we're gonna do the...
02:14Oh, you're way ahead of me, Ferb.
02:16We'll build the ultimate while you wait pet wash and grooming machine.
02:21I'll call the game.
02:25And for once, we know exactly where Perry is.
02:31Hello, Agent P. We were concerned because we tracked you to the slushy dog.
02:35I mean, do you know how much sodium is in their hot dogs?
02:39But by the third bite, you're committed.
02:42Now we see you're at the vet across the street, which is even more concerning.
02:46Agent P, you cannot be chipped or your host family could track you at all times.
02:51So could your enemies!
02:53Carl, are you familiar with the phrase, no duh?
02:55Uh, getting chipped could put the entire operation in danger.
02:58So, avoid it by any means necessary.
03:01But it's, uh, it's always good to have a check-up.
03:03It is flea-antic season.
03:06Yes, yes it is, Carl.
03:09Uh, why do I do this to myself?
03:11I'm not even thinking about hot dogs and then I just walk by this place and it's like, I lose
03:15all control.
03:18Oh, but by the third bite, you're committed.
03:21Wait, is that, is that Perry the platypus?
03:24Well, he is an animal.
03:26Maybe he's got worms or something.
03:28He should watch what he eats.
03:29Hmm, what is he doing?
03:32Look at him over there, protagonizing.
03:34Now I have to go over there and antagonize.
03:37Ugh, one more bite.
03:38Oh, I hate myself.
03:43Wow, nobody puts condiments on dogs like you do.
03:48That might be why they made me assistant junior manager. Just got promoted.
03:51Whoa, so you're conditionally in charge?
03:54Well, only on weekends before 11, but...
03:57Candace, I love that you came to visit.
03:59But rules are rules.
04:00Paying customers only.
04:02Fine, one slushy fry is handsome.
04:05There's also that sign.
04:07No flirting with employees. Is it that big of a problem?
04:10One chili dog, and your shirt color really suits your eyes.
04:15You've already been warned, Buford.
04:18PA biz4
04:20ROOP
04:22MELLS
04:24Ha ha ha!
04:36Ah!
04:38Ah!
04:41Ah!
04:44Ah!
05:00Oh!
05:00Thank goodness the main office is sending over a temporary vet to help.
05:03Give him his chipping gun and send him to exam room 1 when he gets here.
05:13oh hello have you seen a platypus around here not yay hi very trappable oh you're the doctor
05:20no i'm yes i am i am a doctor thank you thank you a lot of people just stampede straight
05:26to
05:27pharmacist for some reason great here's the chipping gun follow me a chipping gun like a
05:32tracking chip wait a minute just so i understand this correctly this is an apparatus that will
05:38plant a tracking chip into an animal allowing anyone to know where they are at all times
05:44i could put a chip in my goat
05:50no wait even better my goldfish
05:57or even better than that i can chip perry the platypus this is amazing this is like a platypus
06:05findinator that i didn't even have to think of or build it's like getting a freebie man i need to
06:11hit slushy dog more often sorry thighs all i need is to find perry the platypus right this way doctor
06:21in here you'll find a platypus really oh this is too easy
06:27oh wait you're just a regular platypus i'm sorry you're completely useless to me no offense
06:34now which roomie the roomie puss would pay the platypus beer
06:49if you have a terrier or something hairier we can clean them up with you just let them on out
06:56of that
06:57carrier if you've got a maltese or maybe a pecanese we can give them a blow out with just a
07:04little tease
07:05at the pet wash we can bathe in bars and pebble
07:09at the pet wash get your animal off the next level
07:13at the pet wash
07:15might be coming in luck and disheveled
07:17you're gonna walk out the door saying oh my god
07:20stand on the dead of the best pet wash
07:22pet wash
07:23where it's good as the advertising
07:25at the pet wash
07:27when we thought you won't recognize them
07:29at the pet wash
07:31check out on that chin bike
07:33and if you thought your pup would never be this posh
07:36then you seriously underestimated us
07:38pet wash
07:41perry the platypus
07:43where are you
07:47aha perry the platypus
07:49no uh phil the accountant
07:51doctor about hazel's eczema
07:53oh
07:54whoops
07:56i'm just gonna eczema this room
08:02perry the platypus
08:03oh no i i didn't know you were so sick
08:06stay with me
08:08wait
08:08you're not perry the platypus
08:10that's felix my beaver
08:12he likes to hide under a blanket
08:14yeah i think i'm just gonna eczema this room
08:17doctor you're supposed to be in exam room one
08:19with the platypus
08:20i'm actually not familiar with this species
08:24mind if i stay and observe
08:25well i guess i could warm up with this platypus
08:28here you go
08:29hold still
08:30hold still
08:32hold still
08:34it's a good thing i have this practice platypus
08:36because this is much harder than i thought
08:40yeah brain freeze
08:44so anyway
08:45as i was saying
08:46how nice is this to be taking a little break
08:49oh man
08:50okay okay
08:51paying customer here
08:53kick me with another chili dog
08:55but hold the onions
08:56anyway as i was saying
08:57how nice to be taking a break
09:07phineas and ferv
09:14mom mom mom mom
09:16how's it going
09:17oh yeah jeremy got all his shots
09:18and perry got promoted
09:19but you gotta come back to see what the boys are doing
09:21fine i'll see you soon
09:24even perry the platypus isn't this difficult
09:26maybe he's nervous because i'm here
09:29oh yeah good
09:30i don't think i can keep up this vet thing
09:32perry the platypus how did you get in here
09:35oh never mind
09:36happy home
09:37well it started as a chipping gun
09:40but now it's my platypus finder in 8r
09:42you missed the
09:43the whole rebranding process
09:52trying to chip me
09:53how original
09:54my idea
09:55copycat
09:56copycat
10:04hey perry the platypus
10:05you want some fish with those chips
10:20i'm starting to think that's not the temp vat
10:22yeah then where is he
10:25and now i'm committed
10:33you are chipped now baby
10:46hurray
10:47let's go
10:53ah
10:54uh
10:55ah
10:55ah
10:55hurry
11:05a sun shower how lovely but oh look candace a rainbow but but but but thanks for your help
11:13kids it got a little crazy there for a while our pleasure i'm happy to report that perry has a
11:19clean bill of health oh i almost forgot it's three chipping today would you like to have him chip
11:25nah he's a platypus they don't do much
11:32funny it senses one of you have been chipped that's me from that time i went feral
11:44ready one two three
11:49and off she goes baljeet cue the live feed the ball should arrive at mount kilimanjaro in roughly
11:5511 minutes cool the first ever game of lacrosse country it's kind of weird that we're doing it
12:01at night well that's just because it'll be morning in africa when it lands i just hope
12:06ferb makes it back in time to see it happen what is farb doing i don't know he didn't say
12:14what should we do while we wait hmm do not even think about suggesting the bread bowl hot tub again
12:20too late hearty thunk what about regular size lacrosse but rocket power great idea isabella
12:25perry can be the ref hey where is perry
12:32apologies agent p and sorry for calling you in after hours fish have been mysteriously
12:37disappearing all over danville smells like doofenshmirtz to me you know because he often
12:43smells a lot like fish mackerel specifically get back on that camera carl interns these days what are
12:49we even not paying them for unfortunately we're running low on budget because we spent most of
12:54our money making new entrances for your lair get to doofenshmirtz quickly before your overtime kicks in
13:03he always forgets to turn off the lights i'll just get it with the remote
13:10why do we even have a dance party setting worth every penny sir
13:16well that's it for me carl the season premiere of workplace acquaintances is tonight and i hear
13:21the episode is really tepid oh i've got to get to my part-time job i'm late for work
13:25this is your job carl everything else is a hobby
13:29huh use these days
13:33right this way please
13:40no lobster this is turf and turf night we got a food critic out there
13:47carl where are you i'm at work sir
13:49sure you are agent p still hasn't finished his mission and our trackers show he's in your area
13:55wait how would you know agent p is near me unless you have a tracker and me too
13:58never mind that carl his overtime is expensive and you on the other hand are free so stop goofing
14:04off find doof and help agent p finish up fast
14:11i think i found him so
14:15thanks for taking time out of your evening to ford me perry the platypus
14:19you know the old saying give a man a fish he eats for a day give a man a fishinator
14:24and he can rule the entire dry state area
14:29orders up
14:34i'm still working on a real evil application for this but we're now all settled for serving people live fish
14:40without consent it's a little evil
14:42i can handle things here agent p you go after doofenshmirtz
14:56carl removing fish from plates carl because nobody ordered that carl serving turf and turf
15:06here's so much more than it injured
15:10brilliant work carl you truly are the cream of the corn
15:13oh thanks boss
15:15now check in on the critic for me won't you
15:17uh excuse me can i ask how the review's going
15:21oh i'm not a food critic i'm just working on my screenplay
15:25well do you have any notes on the food the appetizer felt unmotivated
15:30oh weasel toes i've got to get into costume and get to my next job
15:33good luck carl
15:35hmm well if he's not the food critic who is
15:40how was the meal sir
15:41the turf was excellent
15:43but the turf left a bit to be desired
15:53what is it now sir carl agent p isn't done and you're literally clowning around
15:58but sir i'm at work
15:59you mean hobby
16:01go help it
16:03a birthday party perfect this is next on the list of things i can ruin
16:07with fish
16:09i wish this was a gift card
16:12i don't
16:16keep after doof agent p i'll fix things here
16:19call cheering up children
16:24call moonlighting as a party clown
16:27call with fish in a fountain
16:30he's so much more than it intends
16:34now blow out your candles and make a wish
16:37i wish for this experience not to traumatize me for life
16:40i don't
16:42nice save man you doing okay
16:44yeah thanks i just have to get to my next job
16:50i have an engineering degree
16:57usually some unforeseen element would have removed our invention by now
17:01perhaps we should take it down
17:04i'm sure nature will find a way
17:13you're just in time delivery boy dude
17:16i got a fresh one going out
17:18this one's priority pal
17:19it's perplexing how impatient patrons are for a pizza pie with their profile pick up on it
17:25alliteration
17:26don't be late
17:27remember customer retention is way more important
17:30than employee mental health
17:33hi
17:34carl what are you doing
17:36i already told you i'm at work
17:38no excuses agent p is going into triple overtime
17:40and auca will be bankrupt
17:42sir i really shouldn't be
17:44commercial's over my show's about to start
17:46just get to it carl
17:50so i figured it all out
17:52a fish in the hand is worth two in the inaether
17:54but a fish in everyone's hands
17:56means they can't stop me from taking over
17:59the entire tri-state area
18:03because their hands are full
18:05of fish
18:23go get him agent p i've got a pizza to deliver
18:42okay time to fight fish with fish you know like surf and surf
18:55what are you doing it's so late
18:58yes yes it is
18:59well if it's still here in the morning i'm gonna bust you guys
19:20see nature always finds a way
19:22we are not fish leaping distance within any body of water
19:26how is that nature
19:31oh well you give a platypus a fish and he claws here in aether
19:40wait where did all the fish go
19:44i can't believe you opened an aquarium but forgot to buy any fish
19:58and there they are
19:59can't you pay the platypus
20:14call delivering pizzas
20:17call
20:18put the elevators down
20:21call
20:22whatever he'll just take the stairs
20:24call
20:25it's only eight floors off the ground
20:28moonlighting hours
20:29i'm monopoly frenetic
20:31i'm telling you this kid has got a crazy work ethic
20:35here's so much more than an intern
20:42sorry for the delay
20:43it's been over 30 minutes that means my pizza is free
20:47carl is that you
20:49major monogram
20:52well carl if you hadn't wasted your evening with all your silly antics
20:55maybe you'd be able to deliver a pizza on time
20:58silly antics i've told you three times now those are my part-time jobs
21:02well i thought you were joking about that but you know seeing you in uniform and handing me a pizza
21:08i admit i might be mistaken
21:10sir i'm an unpaid intern how do you think i afford to pay rent
21:14with experience and exposure
21:15i even have to pay for my own parking at alka
21:18this internship is actually costing me money
21:21i love this job but if i keep having to work like this even in my off hours i
21:29you know carl i see firsthand just how much you do for alka
21:33and although it goes without saying
21:34i'm going to say it
21:36you are one of the hardest workers i know
21:38you're not just an intern
21:39you're more than an intern
21:46thanks sir that means a lot
21:48in fact uh why don't you come on in and enjoy a slice on me
21:53and i've even got a special surprise for you
21:55you're getting paid
21:57i i'm being promoted to paid intern
22:01no for the delivery
22:02even though it was 37 seconds late
22:05but i will be sure to validate your parking
22:08a paid intern
22:10that would be preposterous
22:12wow i think my career just took a giant step forward
22:16i don't
22:18can it brittany
22:25finally
22:25honey i'll see you in the morning
22:30if you have a terrier
22:31or something hairier
22:34we can clean them up with you
22:36just let them on out of that carrier
22:37if you've got a maltese
22:40or maybe a pecanese
22:42we can give them a blowout
22:44with just a little tease
22:45at the pet wash
22:47we can bathe in version level
22:49at the pet wash
22:51get your animal off the next level
22:53and if you thought your boss would never be this boss
22:56then you seriously underestimated us
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