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Watch How I Met Your Mother () Canning Randy ( AMZN WEB DL x265 Silence) Season 6 Episode 7 online in HD on Dailymotion (2005).
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00:00And so, due to one architectural oversight,
00:03the Toledo Bridge disaster of 1906
00:05claimed the lives of 75 people.
00:09Now, I hate to stop while I'm on a roll,
00:12but happy Halloween, you crazies.
00:16Hey, Professor Brosby.
00:17You gonna come get beers with this later?
00:19Nah, I got a thing.
00:20But you kids have fun trick-or-treating.
00:22This is our treat.
00:24You're the coolest, Professor Brosby.
00:26Well, hot dog.
00:28Did it hurt?
00:30What?
00:30Getting that kid's nose surgically removed from your ass.
00:34It's not her nose that's in my ass, Lily.
00:36It's her heart.
00:38My class loves me.
00:39I'm really making an impression on those guys.
00:43I'd like to make an impression on those guys.
00:45And I love the office Halloween party.
00:48It is so much sluttier than the office Christmas party.
00:51Though, not as freaky as the office President's Day rave.
00:55Or the office tubish spot pajama jammy jam.
00:59Hey, guys.
01:00Hey, boss.
01:01Hey, Randy.
01:02Uh, you want a beer?
01:03Oh, no, thank you.
01:03I brew my own.
01:04At the risk of bragging, my hazelnut pilsner won fourth prize at the Weehawken Retirement
01:09Home Clambake and Wheelchair Maintenance Picnic.
01:12I wouldn't consider any part of that bragging.
01:15Hey, uh, it just occurred to me.
01:16Is your friend, uh, what's her name?
01:18Gobbin?
01:18Flobin?
01:19Robin.
01:19Robin.
01:20That's it, yeah.
01:20Is she coming tonight?
01:21I don't really care.
01:23Robin has another party to go to.
01:25Oh, damn it!
01:26I'm leaving!
01:27But she might stop by later.
01:29Guess I can hang out a little longer.
01:37So, uh, anyone going to see the, uh, Halloween parade?
01:40Oh, we were big fans of New York's annual Halloween parade.
01:43I don't mean the one that takes place Halloween night in the village.
01:46I mean the one that takes place the morning of November 1st.
01:49The annual post-Halloween Walk of Shame parade.
01:52Look at them.
01:53Heading home after their dirty, filthy hookups.
01:57Ooh.
01:58Looks like that bee got busy.
02:00Huh.
02:01Looks like that French maid didn't turn down somebody's bed.
02:04Oh.
02:05Looks like, uh, Pocahontas has a couple of wounded knees.
02:08Come on, Marshal.
02:09There's a line that you just...
02:10We get it.
02:11Does it get any better than this?
02:14Uh, yes.
02:16Yes, it does.
02:19Ah.
02:20Crap.
02:37There she is.
02:39Florence Knight in bed with a stranger.
02:42So is the lucky patient.
02:43I don't want to talk about it.
02:45Please tell me you're not hooking up with one of your co-anchors again.
02:48My co-anchor's a woman.
02:49Please tell me you are hooking up with one of your co-anchors again.
02:51Robin had always believed that the key to success was intelligence, hard work, and professionalism.
02:56Her new co-anchor, Becky, had a different philosophy.
02:58Boats!
02:59Boats!
03:01Boats!
03:01Boats!
03:02It's the Far Hampton Boat Show!
03:04Boats!
03:05Boats!
03:06Boats!
03:08Boats!
03:10Boats!
03:13Boats!
03:14Boats!
03:17Boats!
03:20Boats!
03:24Boats!
03:28Boats!
03:29Boats!
03:29Boats!
03:30Boats!
03:31Boats!
03:31Boats!
03:31Boats!
03:32Boats!
03:32Boats!
03:32Boats!
03:35Boats!
03:36And you gotta not worry so much about being liked.
03:38Oh, easy for you to say.
03:40Everybody loves you at your job.
03:42That was true of my teaching job,
03:43but I was also designing the new headquarters
03:45for Goliath National Bank.
03:47And, well...
03:48Ted Mosby, we don't like you!
03:51What do you have to say for yourself
03:53tearing down a beautiful old building
03:54just to put up a stupid bank headquarters?
03:59Boo-freaking-who.
04:02Boo-freaking-who, that's it?
04:04The Arcadian is an architecturally significant...
04:08Architecturally significant?
04:10Zoe, you're very pretty.
04:12Your hair smells great.
04:13Shampoo. You should try it sometime.
04:15You don't know the first thing about architecture.
04:18He, Ted Mosby's car.
04:21Go on.
04:22I'm a professor, okay?
04:23I teach this stuff at one of the best colleges in the country.
04:26I don't go down to your place of non-employment
04:28and lecture you about how your little protest
04:30is a misguided waste of time.
04:32Except, whoops, I just did.
04:34A bird!
04:35Oh, good. The eggs are here.
04:36Well, I should head up.
04:38No, GMB was not popular.
04:40That's why every year they produced a feel-good video
04:42to improve the bank's image.
04:43What makes Goliath National Bank different
04:46from other big banks?
04:47Here at GMB, we care.
04:49I care about our precious Earth.
04:54I care about old people.
04:57I care about high-yield offshore investments.
05:00And so does Tugboat here.
05:02Isn't that right, Tugboat?
05:04Yeah.
05:05Okay, get that camera out of my face
05:07before I flip you like a cheese omelet.
05:09All you have to do is say,
05:11I care about making dreams come true.
05:15First of all, that line makes me sound like a hooker,
05:17and saying it makes me feel like a hooker.
05:20Everyone is in this video.
05:22Randy's in the video.
05:23I don't want to brag, but in 29 takes,
05:26I only threw up thrice.
05:28Great.
05:29Randy, did you send the Hermanson contracts downtown?
05:31I did.
05:32I sent them downtown.
05:34Why are you saying it like that?
05:35They never arrived at the downtown office.
05:37They...
05:38Well, just to make sure we're on the same page,
05:40is send them downtown not an expression
05:42for shredding a document.
05:44You shredded them?
05:46I sent them downtown.
05:48You know, down into the shredder.
05:49You feed the paper in a downward fashion,
05:52so that's where the expression comes from.
05:53That's not an expression.
05:54That has never been an expression.
05:56Okay, I can fix this.
05:57I am all over this project.
06:02I'll say this.
06:03There is no quid in that guy.
06:05You should fire him.
06:06Okay, that.
06:07That right there.
06:08That attitude is exactly why I won't be in your video,
06:10because GMB doesn't care.
06:12They hand out pink slips like they're hors d'oeuvres.
06:14Just last week, I was talking to Arthur.
06:17Whoa, whoa.
06:18You're wearing a green tie?
06:19No, I'm wearing a green tie.
06:23GMB treats people like they're disposable,
06:25and I will not be a part of that.
06:27Marshall Erickson does not fire people, period.
06:32Uh, just want you to know we are making good progress
06:35on this new project.
06:37Oh, you gentlemen keep talking?
06:38I will answer that.
06:40Marshall Erickson's office?
06:42Yeah, I can get that for you.
06:43Just a second.
06:47Uh, bank.
06:49The B stands for bank.
06:51Okay, mother, I'll see you tonight.
06:53Oh, yikes, I better give Mr. Messi a napkin.
06:54Oh, yikes.
06:58Oh, yikes.
07:02Oh, yikes.
07:04Oh, yikes.
07:05Just tell me who you slept with.
07:07Don't leave.
07:07I don't want to get into it, okay?
07:09Aha.
07:10It's someone we know.
07:11If it was some ding-dong we didn't know, you'd just give me his name.
07:14Fine.
07:15It's Bill Pepper.
07:18Bill Pepper.
07:19Hmm?
07:20Hmm.
07:20Kind of a coincidence.
07:21There happens to be a Bill and a Pepper shaker here on the table.
07:25Any chance you and Bill had a three-way with a fork napkin?
07:29Oh, God.
07:30It's someone we know.
07:33So, I'm assuming you all read the chapters on Greek revival architecture.
07:37Any questions?
07:38Yes.
07:39How do you sleep at night?
07:45What are you doing here?
07:46It was recently made clear to me that I don't know the first thing about architecture.
07:50So, here I am.
07:54Very well then.
07:55Let's get started.
07:57Some examples of Greek revival architecture...
08:00Ooh, ooh!
08:01Is the Arcadian Greek revival?
08:04No.
08:06What's the Arcadian?
08:08Oh, it's just this beautiful old building that Professor Mosby wants to tear down.
08:12What?
08:13No.
08:14Professor Mosby loves old buildings.
08:16He wouldn't do that.
08:17Right, Ted?
08:19I'm getting back to Greek revival.
08:23I lost him.
08:24Look, you're new at teaching.
08:26In my kindergarten class, I have had plenty of troublesome students.
08:30Like Johnny Marley.
08:36Johnny.
08:37Johnny!
08:39Johnny!
08:39He and that little stuffed horsey raised all kinds of hell.
08:43But I have a simple method for shutting down troublemakers.
08:47You know that 98 tourist that's always parked outside?
08:50The one with the really annoying alarm?
09:01We're familiar with it.
09:03You know, when a kid like Johnny acts up in my class?
09:07Whoa!
09:09Whoa!
09:10Whoa!
09:11Whoa!
09:12Whoa!
09:14Whoa!
09:14Whoa!
09:15Whoa!
09:18Shuts them right up.
09:20Lily, my students are adults and I treat them that way.
09:23I'll just give them more candy and make them a mixed CD.
09:25Problem solved.
09:27Well, baby, what's wrong?
09:31Something bad happened.
09:33Randy, hey, have you seen the...
09:35Before you get to that, regarding the earlier project I was working on...
09:39Voila!
09:40That's the Hermanson contract?
09:42The Hermanson contract?
09:44Oh, man, this is the Filbert contract.
09:47Damn it!
09:48Anyway, what's your thing?
09:50I need the Filbert contract!
09:53No!
09:56Well, I'll do what I can, but in my experience, twice shredded is fairly permanent.
10:04Sorry, Randy.
10:06This just isn't working out.
10:09Marshall popped his cherry!
10:10Oh!
10:11Come on, Marshall.
10:13You have to admit, the guy was a disaster.
10:15I mean, it reflected badly on the company.
10:17He was an embarrassment.
10:20A huge embarrassment.
10:21You slept with Randy!
10:23What?
10:24Why, it's elementary, my dear Shavotson.
10:28Your co-host is getting super popular because of her stupid commercial.
10:32Vote, vote, vote!
10:33So, when you arrived at the GMB party after we left, you were feeling vulnerable.
10:38And drunk.
10:40Then, from across the not-so-crowded conference room, your eyes met.
10:50And as we all remember, Randy has a unique condition.
10:54Yeah, your nose is bleeding like a faucet.
10:57Oh, God, this happens every time I get an erection.
10:59I am so sorry.
11:05That's...
11:07Exactly what happened.
11:09See, Marshall?
11:11If getting fired is an execution, at least the guy had a last meal.
11:14I promise you, tomorrow you'll feel a lot better.
11:19Randy.
11:20Hey, what's going on?
11:21I just wanted to say no hurt feelings.
11:26So, where are you headed now?
11:30Downtown.
11:38Is it okay, baby?
11:40It wasn't okay.
11:41So, the next morning...
11:42Arthur, I'm here because I made a mistake.
11:45I fired Randy yesterday.
11:46That was a mistake.
11:47You should have fired him a year ago.
11:49No, sir.
11:50That is what's wrong with this company.
11:52How can we say,
11:53GNB cares and then turn around and treat someone like that?
11:57I mean, sure, he made a few mistakes, but everybody makes mistakes.
12:00Like, like, Tugboat here.
12:02Aww.
12:02I bet you he's made some mistakes.
12:04And you didn't fire Tugboat, did you?
12:07No, I got him fixed and he calmed down.
12:09Exactly.
12:10Kind of.
12:11Randy doesn't need to be fired.
12:13He needs to be fixed.
12:14Marshall, we do some pretty bad things around here.
12:17Sir, I'm saying,
12:18instead of getting rid of someone when they screw up,
12:21we should...
12:22we should help them.
12:24We should nurture them.
12:26Aww.
12:30I changed the ice pack on his crotch every hour for three days.
12:35Wow.
12:36Erickson,
12:37if you want to unfire Randy,
12:39I support you.
12:40Because to come in here and say what you just said,
12:42well, you got a couple things that Tugboat doesn't.
12:49Guys,
12:50Prop Rock is a really good mix, okay?
12:52A piece of New York history is being torn down,
12:55and all you could say was boo freaking who?
12:58Boo?
12:59I may have mentioned our conversation over a session of hacky sack.
13:03The one day I missed the sack circle you guys subbed her in?
13:06Why'd you miss?
13:08Too busy tearing down the Statue of Liberty?
13:10No.
13:11I was returning a hot dog costume that you all enjoyed!
13:15Oh, God!
13:17They were all turning against me,
13:19so I figured...
13:20What the hell?
13:21Oh, God!
13:23Oh, God!
13:24Oh, God!
13:26Oh, God!
13:28Oh, God!
13:29Oh, God!
13:30Oh, God!
13:31Oh, God!
13:31Oh, God!
13:32Oh, God!
13:33Oh, God!
13:35Oh, God!
13:35And did it work?
13:37Gangbusters.
13:37We're buddies again.
13:38After class,
13:39we hacked a little sack to the Thump and Straits
13:41my Prof Rock CD,
13:42and no, none of them had heard of the Pixies' B-side.
13:45Actually, none of them had heard of the Pixies.
13:47Or a B-side.
13:48Hey, guys.
13:49Uh-oh.
13:50I know that smile.
13:52Lily, there's no easy way to say this.
13:54Marshall's dead.
13:55Randy murdered him.
13:56No.
13:57I know why Randy is smiling.
13:59You're smiling because of Robin.
14:02Robin?
14:02Like how I think about her when I'm in the shower?
14:05I'm trying to eat here, buddy.
14:07No.
14:07Because you slept with her on Halloween.
14:10What?
14:11No!
14:11I went home, had a shower, and went to bed.
14:15You didn't sleep with her?
14:16No!
14:16Even in the shower, the farthest we ever get is hugging.
14:21So why are you smiling?
14:23I'll tell you why.
14:25This just isn't working out.
14:27I'm fired great.
14:29This is the candle kiosk at the mall all over again.
14:33Wait a minute.
14:35I get a severance check.
14:37If I don't shred it, I can use that money to start my own brewery.
14:42Imagine a beer with my name on it.
14:44Randy Warmpus, this is the best day of your life.
14:50Thanks to that severance check, this time next year, you'll all be enjoying a frothy mug of Warmpus.
14:56Randy, great news.
14:58You're not fired.
15:07Good morning, everybody.
15:13Where's my class?
15:17Hello, Professor.
15:26I got you your job back, Randy.
15:28I thought that you'd be happy.
15:29But I don't belong here.
15:31I'm born to be a brewer, a hopsmeister.
15:33Well, then quit.
15:34No one's stopping you.
15:36I can't.
15:37I need my severance check.
15:38Well, I'm sorry, Randy, but that's called fraud.
15:40It's not fraud.
15:41I'm just asking you to give me a lot of money to not work here and not tell anyone about
15:45it.
15:46Even if I wanted to fire you after my talk with Arthur yesterday...
15:49Oh, come on.
15:49Arthur can't remember that.
15:51Marshall, what a memorable talk we had yesterday.
15:54Randy, on behalf of everyone at GNB, both in and out of prison, we're sorry.
15:59And I want to assure you, you will never be fired again.
16:02You're gonna work here until you die.
16:04Huh?
16:05Huh?
16:06Green tie?
16:09Nice choice.
16:10Thanks.
16:11Brings out my eyes.
16:12Yeah.
16:12I'll bring out your eyes.
16:15Listen, Randy, I'm sorry, but I broke my own moral code once, and I felt evil.
16:20I will not let GNB change me.
16:22I will never fire anyone again ever.
16:26But we'll see about that.
16:32Anywho, while I got you, big smile.
16:35We care about making dreams come true in three, two...
16:38No!
16:40What are you doing?
16:41Oh, are you unhappy with my performance?
16:44Well, I guess I'm fired, then.
16:45I better turn in my ID.
16:47No, it's actually, um, nice having some of this clutter off my desk.
16:51So thank you, Randy.
16:57Yeah, there's Mark.
17:01I don't know what I'm gonna use this for, but it's great stuff.
17:04Now am I fired?
17:06I've been meaning to clean out that file cabinet for ages.
17:10I'm not even here.
17:11Randy, the coffee.
17:14Okay, okay.
17:16Okay.
17:19Randy, I've been meaning to cut back on my caffeine.
17:22Here, try this.
17:23Don't really go for it.
17:24Remember, this guy ruined your life.
17:32That's just the pick-me-up I needed.
17:35Speaking of pick-ups, can we try the first one again?
17:42Hello?
17:42It didn't work.
17:44They hate me.
17:44How do I get them to like me again?
17:46You don't.
17:47Ted, you're their teacher.
17:48The only people that like their teachers...
17:51I like my teachers.
17:51...are dorks.
17:53Except for you, Miles.
17:57Look, Ted, you just have to learn to embrace their hatred.
18:00Because behind that hatred lies fear.
18:03And you can use that fear.
18:05Like I did with Johnny Marley.
18:07Was there more to that story?
18:09A little bit.
18:23Aaaaah!
18:28Lily, you're a psychopath.
18:31A little bit.
18:33Aww, Pinda!
18:37I thought about Lily's advice,
18:39and I figured fear was worth a try.
18:44Well, Professor Mosby, is there anything you want to say to us?
18:48Anyone not in class tomorrow gets an F.
18:53You said that?
18:55Well, technically they'd get an incomplete,
18:57but I thought F had a nice scary ring to it.
19:00Hey, guys. Robin, who'd you sleep with?
19:03I told you. Randy. He was a machine.
19:07Where's the poop, Robin?
19:11Fine. I didn't sleep with anyone.
19:13The thing is, ever since Becky did that commercial,
19:16everyone at work loves her.
19:17So the day after Halloween, I was in a commercial.
19:21Why didn't you tell us?
19:24Bladder trouble. It's embarrassing.
19:26It's uncomfortable, and it can affect anyone.
19:30I'm going to the bathroom right now.
19:32Neat and discreet adult diapers for anyone.
19:36Say...
19:41Ah...
19:46Wow! I can't wait to see it.
19:48Well, hopefully you never will.
19:49They said that they might not even use it.
19:51It ran for seven years.
19:53Where have they been on you?
19:55Okay, you win.
19:58Maybe trashing your office was a mistake.
20:00It's just, uh...
20:02As long as I can remember, making beer has been my dream.
20:07Wormpus?
20:11I know it sounds dumb to someone who's already achieved his dream.
20:15Big-time lawyer at a huge corporation.
20:17You think working here is my dream?
20:19Of course.
20:21Anyways.
20:23I'll clean this stuff up.
20:24Have someone get that dead squirrel out of your desk.
20:30Randy?
20:32This is delicious.
20:35Fine.
20:39Kids, the next morning, my class had the highest attendance ever.
20:46And not long after that, Randy used his severance money to start a little brewery.
20:51Now you can have a Wormpus at every bar in America.
20:55And all because...
20:56I care about making dreams come true.
21:01Got what you need?
21:02Yep.
21:03That's a wrap.
21:30It's all...
21:33a wonderful time.
21:34You want to take a really nice ride of someone.
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