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00:09It's not sniggering. It isn't big, it isn't clever, and it certainly isn't funny. Ray!
00:14Come in, sir. Ray, come in here. I want everybody in the briefing room in 15 minutes, and you
00:21two want you in there now. Sir. All right, come and do some, Bill. You look lovely, by the way,
00:24sir.
00:50The Good God.
01:13The reason I brought you here, gentlemen, is to make an example of these two officers who
01:17I've just caught red-handed. I've caught red-handed in the female toilets, molesting female officers
01:26without their consent. Ray, sir. And I will not tolerate this kind of victimisation. Furthermore,
01:38it's unthinkable that we can be seen to be sexist, racist, homophobic, or harbouring any other
01:47prejudices. After all, we are Her Majesty's police force.
01:53Operation Snowdrop is my latest initiative to bring my officers back in touch with what's
01:59going on with the minorities in the community. And I'm going to trawl the force and bring
02:04all the minorities that we have in the force to work here, alongside my men, so they're
02:10back in touch with what I call the real world. And I think Operation Snowdrop's going to
02:15be a great success.
02:17But Beach quickly encounters his first hurdle.
02:22I did try it. I phoned Hendon, and I only had two black recruits, and they're on toilet-cleaning
02:28duties. How is anybody supposed to learn anything about prejudice?
02:32I know, but they said keeping their toilets clean is just as important, so...
02:38This is the most innovative programme ever introduced, and I expect nothing less than
02:43full cooperation, Ray. With respect, sir, it's a great idea, but I don't think
02:47their men are going to go for it. They'll have to go for it. If they don't go for it,
02:51I'll duck their bloody wages. And if that doesn't work, I'll sack them. See how they
02:57like that?
02:58Go and ask them again.
02:59I suggest you do.
03:00Ooh, I'll say it for your feet, Tom. He said no.
03:04What was that?
03:05Yes, as Commissioner, I'm well aware of Beach's attempt to educate his men in the need
03:10of minorities. I have therefore decided to appoint a senior officer, Assistant Commissioner
03:16at Terra Blanche, one of the best minority relations officers that we have in the force, and he
03:22will be there to supervise Beach.
03:24Well, gentlemen, I'm absolutely delighted, I'm tickled skinny today, to introduce to you
03:29a very special gentleman, Assistant Commissioner Terra Blanche here, who is a speciality community
03:38relations officer.
03:39Well, I've been the community relations officer of the force now for ten years. I've been at
03:45Brixton, Streatham, Toxteth. Of course, I know the black community very well. Of course,
03:51they make very good footballers, aren't they? And they call the nation as runners, is not
03:55to be questioned. But as police officers, I'm not so sure. You see, it's just that they've
04:01got smaller brains.
04:03I'm also pleased to announce to you today that my initiative, Operation Snowdrop, has moved
04:08on to yet another stage. And Assistant Commissioner Terra Blanche is going to teach you guys a thing
04:14or two. Because you are scum. You are filthy, racist, sexist, bigoted, scum. What are you?
04:27What's going on? Scum, sir. I can't hear you at all. Scum, sir. Scum, sir. Yes, that's
04:34what you are. And we are going to rid this unit of its petty prejudices. And with the help
04:42of Assistant Commissioner Terra Blanche, we are going to ensure that every single minority
04:48imaginable is going to be represented in this unit. And Operation Snowdrop will be a success.
04:55Operation Snowdrop will be held as a yardstick for community policing for years and years to
05:00come. And you can feel very proud of yourselves that you are the pioneers of this operation.
05:06Even though you are scum.
05:09I want you to ask yourselves, could you work with black people? Could you work with Asian
05:15people? Could you work with disabled people, people in wheelchairs? Could you work with
05:21women? Because in today's police force, we have to.
05:26At last, both Ray and I were absolutely amazed that we couldn't actually find new black police
05:33officers to recruit for the project. However, Assistant Commissioner Terra Blanche has said
05:40that he has a solution to this problem.
05:44The solution that Assistant Commissioner Terra Blanche has put forward, however, is not the one
05:50beach expected.
05:51With great disrespect to her, we feel this is a little over the top.
05:55Oh, no, no, no. Perfect. Perfect. Both of you. Look at that hair.
05:58They're normal.
05:59Stick your backsides out. You know, they'll stick their backsides out and put a shelf on them,
06:03you know?
06:03OK.
06:04Lovely. Great.
06:05Did anyone say you look like Diana Ross?
06:08Yeah.
06:09You do, don't you?
06:10Well, come on, let's take it seriously. Come on, come on.
06:14Admittedly, we couldn't find any black people for Operation Snowdrop, but under the guidance,
06:19the expert guidance of Assistant Commissioner Tara Blanche, we are able to improvise, as you
06:24can see. But I guarantee you that we're going to find every other single minority within the
06:30police force, and we're going to have them here. Genuine officers. None of this mamby-pamby,
06:37special civilian crap. Proper officers, representing the minorities, and we're all going to get
06:42the opportunity to learn from them.
06:44Well, you know, the Assistant Commissioner Tara Blanche's idea was OK, I suppose. We tried
06:51for black officers, but we couldn't find any. We tried for gay officers, but they were scared
06:56off a little bit because the two that come forward got the sack immediately.
07:00We tried for disabled people and that. And we tried for WPCs, but unfortunately, Assistant
07:06Commissioner Tara Blanche said we couldn't use them because they don't work as hard as
07:10men. So we've just got to improvise, I suppose.
07:16Well, as you know, sir, as you're aware, that we've encountered some difficulties gathering
07:21together the minorities within the police force that we need for this initiative. But not
07:25a worry. We've used our imagination, and we've created our own minorities, and these people
07:31that you see in front of you here are going to go into the areas of society that they now
07:36represent, and they're going to connect with the people. They're going to be amongst the
07:40people, living with them, dealing with... Mark, what are you doing?
07:48Sorry, sir? What do you think you're doing? You're supposed to be a gay policeman.
07:51I am a gay policeman, sir. Well, you don't dress like one, do you?
07:56I had a gay policeman dress, sir. Come with me, boy. I'll show you you're gay.
08:09Well, are you all right, Mark? When the Governor first made us dress like women, we were really
08:15pissed off, man. Last few perks. Have a look. Have a look at this.
08:22I just think it's over the top, sir, to be honest. But, sir, it's just so cliche. I mean,
08:27you know, like, you've got the magnum moustache. It's just going to alienate the gay community.
08:31Alienate anyone. That's your perception of it, just because you're wearing it. But we
08:34can see it, and it looks terrific. But, sir, I know gay police officers, okay, and they
08:39dress normal. You know, they just dress like you and you. I mean...
08:43Yeah, well, you've got to understand that...
08:46Claire Blanche is going for a very overt policy, and when people see you, and gay police, they
08:51will say, oh, oh, there's a gay policeman. And then the gay people will go to you and
08:55then make friends with you. But gay policemen don't dress like this, sir.
08:58They'll be comfortable. Hmm. You'll be accessible.
09:04Strings is not taking his new role seriously.
09:08Hey!
09:12I've got the file on the cliff tar case.
09:15Oh, thank you.
09:16There you go. That's perfect.
09:17It's nice. Just what we want.
09:19We've got a tea with you, though.
09:21We respect, sir, aren't we? I'm not tea lady.
09:23I understand the side. Yeah, Karen.
09:25Is that all right? Sure.
09:29How much do they earn now that they're women?
09:31Same as they always do.
09:32Well, they should have at least a 20% cut.
09:35Women don't work as hard as men. It's a proven statistic.
09:39Get up on your feet now. What do you think you're doing?
09:42It's hard. It's hard work in there.
09:44I don't care. It's like...
09:45Look, people in wheelchairs don't get out of them just because the going gets tough.
09:48They can't. That's the whole point. That's why they're there.
09:51Now, you, mister, and you're a witness to this, are going to be in that chair for a week.
09:54One week without getting out of it. Do you hear me?
09:57No, get in there.
09:59The homeless are scum.
10:01Tara Blanche is dispensing more of his extensive community awareness.
10:06They endlessly beg and coerce money, and then do you know what they do when they get it?
10:10They go out and gamble.
10:12Now, your task, fatty, is simple.
10:14I want you to go out and beg, and then gamble.
10:17Is that a direct order, sir?
10:18Yes, it is. Yes, it is. Keep your chin up when you're talking to me as well.
10:21I thought we were supposed to help people regardless of their means.
10:24You do what I tell you. You get out there and doubt. Beg, gamble. Now, go on.
10:28In order to get a better understanding of the issues surrounding homelessness, Bones has been forced to live rough.
10:34To be quite honest with you, I'm a bit put out. I mean, I don't know why the Governor's chosen
10:39me for the trampy role.
10:40I mean, I'm really, really well turned out normally. My personal hygiene is tip-top. Meticulous.
10:50Some people might even say I'm obsessive about it.
10:54This isn't wheelchair friendly. Look, it's all uphill.
10:59Right, now I've hit the step. I can't reach the bell.
11:03It's ridiculous. I can't get out because he's going to sack me if I cheat and you're filming it all.
11:10Grab us that stick. Grab us that stick, Tom.
11:18Smashing.
11:22That bit's moving.
11:26Well, that's all right, though.
11:30Mmm.
11:36It's long enough now. Look. Hang on.
11:42Oh, success.
11:49Mrs. Hudson.
11:51Yes.
11:51I've come about the burglary.
11:53Oh, yes.
11:54You reported.
11:55Is that right? Yes, I did. Yes, that's right.
11:56Correct.
11:57I'm afraid, can I give it off?
11:58Certainly.
11:58Your rosebush fell off.
12:00I couldn't ring the bell, you see, because I'm in the wheelchair.
12:05Can you tell me some details about the burglary?
12:08Well, it happened upstairs.
12:09Yes.
12:09It was like, oh, they got in upstairs, did they?
12:11Yes, yes.
12:12I'm going to need to look at it, you see, to see if there's any evidence for forensics or they've
12:17left anything behind.
12:19You couldn't help us in, could you?
12:21Yes, yes.
12:21Yeah?
12:22I'll do my best.
12:22Because it's obviously, you know.
12:23Certainly, yes.
12:24I'm from the Minorities Unit, you see, and we're operating in your area at the moment.
12:31There's a fever.
12:33Oh!
12:33Oh!
12:34Oh!
12:39Bones has taken to his new role with unexpected gusto.
12:45Look!
12:46I don't want it done, mate.
12:46I could just give you a pound, mate.
12:48No, piss off.
12:49I bet you would if I was from the bleeding Balkans.
12:51I don't want that.
12:53What do you mean?
12:54F*** you!
12:55F*** off!
12:56What I think is that I've ordered the general public expect us to do jobs for nothing.
13:01We work really hard and then they refuse payment.
13:05Anyway, I hope it don't rain.
13:08Come on, Paul!
13:09Come on, that's it!
13:10Oh!
13:11Hang on!
13:15Good job I had the crew here, innit?
13:16We'd be in right trouble.
13:18Well, my size, you must admit.
13:20You all right for sound there, Tom?
13:22Beach presents Tera Blanche with his version of a gay policeman.
13:27LAUGHTER
13:36About everything.
13:38Is it all?
13:39It's my skin crawl.
13:41This is against God's will.
13:42Which particular bit?
13:43All of it.
13:44I think like any of it.
13:45Sodomite.
13:48Mrs Hudson?
13:49Mrs Hudson, are you all right?
13:51Not really, no.
13:52No.
13:53Not really.
13:53You don't look too good.
13:56Listen, guys.
13:57I need a bit of help here.
13:58Tom?
14:00He's not good, is he?
14:02I'm going to have to call for help.
14:03I'm a bit worried.
14:04You need one of those stair lifts, you know.
14:06Mrs Hudson.
14:07I think you can do with it.
14:09It's too late now, isn't it?
14:09Can I use your phone?
14:11To be honest, it's not that bad being a WPC.
14:13We tend to take it in our stride.
14:16Hey!
14:16Boys!
14:16Get your team!
14:19We're police officers.
14:21Show some respect.
14:24Come down here.
14:25Come down here.
14:26Come down here.
14:27Come down here.
14:28The Perrier.
14:29Now let's see you take the piss out of my heart.
14:33Hey?
14:33You think it's big now, do you?
14:35Well, we're getting to the exciting part of the project now, where we can see my initiative,
14:41Operation Snowdrop.
14:42Absolutely snowballing, if you'll pardon the pun.
14:44And Assistant Commissioner Tara Blanche has taught us to behave like black policemen.
14:51So we can now go into the black community and behave and react completely naturally, as
14:57if indeed we were black policemen.
15:01I don't think women should have to go through that, do you, Bill?
15:04It's terrible, actually.
15:05You know, isn't it?
15:06They always shout at women and they have a problem.
15:08All women need to do is stop, right?
15:10Grab them, bash them up, and then it's done, isn't it?
15:13That's all women need to do.
15:14I can't look it out myself.
15:16It's not the problem.
15:18Now, I'm a white woman.
15:19What would you say to me?
15:20Hey.
15:20What?
15:21Good evening, madam.
15:22How may we help you?
15:23No, no, no, no, no.
15:25When you've been in community relations as long as I have, you'll know that you have
15:28to go, hello, wicked.
15:29Here you are.
15:30Here you are.
15:31Here you are.
15:31Here you are.
15:32Here you are.
15:33Here you are.
15:33Here you are.
15:35Here you are.
15:39Yes, go ahead.
15:40I don't think a black police officer would happen.
15:43Oh, yes, they do.
15:44Well, black people in general don't think they would happen.
15:46Well, yes, they do.
15:46Yes, I know this.
15:47I'm the community relations officer.
15:48What does?
15:51Bones.
15:54Bones.
15:55Come on.
15:55Out.
15:56You've got to move on.
15:57Come on.
15:58What?
15:59I'm sorry, mate.
15:59You've got to move on.
16:00It's my house, though, Mark.
16:02Yeah, but Assistant Commissioner Terra Blanche says you're scum and you've got to move.
16:05Come on.
16:05It took me three days to find this cardboard box.
16:08No, just move.
16:08Come on.
16:08I ain't got all day.
16:09Move.
16:10Take your stuff with you.
16:11No, I'm sorry, mate, but Assistant Commissioner Terra Blanche has specifically said you're scum
16:17and you've got to move.
16:18And don't come back.
16:21Go on.
16:23Go on, on your way.
16:24Go on.
16:30Go on.
16:35Go on.
16:38Go on.
16:40Go on.
16:41Go on.
16:42What do you want to say, Bill, about foundation.
16:44See, you've got foundation on there, haven't you?
16:45Yeah.
16:46On your cheeks.
16:47See, that's what we should do because our beard comes through.
16:49By about five o'clock, it comes through where you look like Fred Flintstone.
16:53No, you should have foundation for her.
16:54That's exactly what I'll say.
16:55Exactly what I'm saying.
16:56Sorry, girls.
16:57This is all very lovely but Mrs Hudson's got a positive ID on the burglary.
17:00She saw him getting out of the back.
17:01Really?
17:01Definitely.
17:02I'll tell you what we should do then, darling. We'll get you into the van, we'll drive it round, and
17:08if you see the burglar, we're at random.
17:10While the trail's still hot. Let's do it.
17:12Hang on, guys. Help us down.
17:14No, because you see those wheels? Last time it laddered all me stockings.
17:19You're a burglar, aren't you?
17:20Miss Hudson nearly died of getting me up. I don't want to die. She's not even in custody.
17:24It's much easier, darling, bringing him down.
17:34What are you doing?
17:36Rummaging in the bin, Mark. I've never seen rummaging in the bin. What are you rummaging in the bin for?
17:40You're a policeman. I've been ordered to rummage in the bin, act like a tramp, rummaging bins, doing all the
17:45things that tramps do.
17:46Yeah, and I've been told to act like a gay policeman. I don't drink in gay clubs and pubs, do
17:49I?
17:49Oh, shut up. You squint a pound on you.
17:52What for? I want to go on the throat machines.
17:58This and this tells you that I know what I'm talking about up to ten years as a community officer
18:03here.
18:03Come on. Off you go. Come on.
18:05Get on, man.
18:06Leo!
18:06That's it.
18:07Leo!
18:09Leo!
18:09Leo!
18:12Leo!
18:12Leo!
18:13Leo!
18:14Leo!
18:16Maria!
18:17Leo!
18:17Very good, yes.
18:19Let's have a laugh. Let's
18:21have an act, let's have an act, that's all.
18:21Yes.
18:34Did I come at me one?
18:44Yeah, well, you know, if you didn't spend your money in here,
18:46you wouldn't need to go scrounging in bins, would you?
18:49Bones is taking his orders to gamble extremely seriously.
18:53You don't be gambling. You don't win anything gambling, do you?
18:56But those are my orders to gamble and scrounge in bins.
18:59All right.
19:02Can you see it, James? Because we've found some.
19:04We've got some here.
19:06No, no, it's been all right.
19:08Hello, chaps. How are we doing?
19:10Mind if we hang out with you a bit?
19:13Stay my ear like that.
19:15High five.
19:18No, no, no, we're not.
19:19What we're doing is, don't let us put you off,
19:20because we're trying to be more accessible to you.
19:23We're doing proper community policing.
19:24Well, that's it. I've done me bollocks now.
19:28Look, I reckon one more pound and we get the £15 plus the repeat chance,
19:32definitely, without a doubt.
19:34Do you reckon?
19:34It's cyclical. It's cyclical.
19:36It goes round, it comes round, it goes round, it comes round.
19:39Did you guarantee that?
19:40I'll guarantee it.
19:41Done.
19:43Well, as you can see, we're driving around now,
19:46so Miss Hudson can see the burglar.
19:48He's still in the area.
19:49And, yeah, actually, you were right about the prejudice.
19:52Since I've been technically disabled,
19:54I've experienced a lot of prejudice.
19:56I mean, the other day...
19:59That bloke nearly killed us.
20:01He just ran into us.
20:02Well, move, move that one.
20:04Why's that?
20:04For **** sake, shift it.
20:07Dear women drivers.
20:17Remember Mrs Hudson?
20:18Pete and Peeld.
20:20Any luck?
20:21See you in a minute?
20:24That's him, that's him!
20:25There he is, Bill!
20:25That's him, we're on, we're on!
20:27Let's go, let's go!
20:28Help us out!
20:29Help us out!
20:30Fuck me on me!
20:31And he's back!
20:33Peeld!
20:34He's at it!
20:35He's at it!
20:36He's at it!
20:37He's at it!
20:37He's at it!
20:38He's at it!
20:38He's at it!
20:39He's at it!
20:39I've sold it!
20:40It's definitely not working, sir!
20:43So how long have you been sleeping rough, Bill?
20:48About two years.
20:50It will take, yeah, two years or so.
20:52Yeah?
20:53Hmm.
20:53Don't it bother you?
20:55No, I don't mind it, don't mind it.
20:56Loads of things to do.
20:57What's you doing weather like this, then, normally?
21:01It's not bad, but I find bus shelter, box,
21:04anything we'll do with you, as long as it's dry.
21:06It's a bit open here, though, isn't it?
21:08I don't mind it, don't mind it, mate.
21:11Oh, mate, you stink!
21:13What is wrong with me?
21:14You stink!
21:14Get off my bench!
21:15Get off my bench, you absolutely stink!
21:17What are these benches?
21:18Get off my bench!
21:19I've got to wash it now, don't I?
21:21Just go and find somewhere else, mate.
21:24Help me!
21:25You've got a mean drink, right?
21:28It doesn't work!
21:30It doesn't work, sir!
21:31I mean, we in the Community Relations Department of the Police Force...
21:35Well, you can't blame him, didn't you, sir?
21:37I mean, they were offended!
21:37Shut up, well, I'm just talking to the camera!
21:40Well, I was trying to make concessions to the minorities, but they've just got the wrong
21:44attitude.
21:51I don't have him!
21:53Right, come here, you!
21:54He's a Nick!
21:56Well, of course, now they know how difficult it can be, this community policing.
21:59I mean, we at the Community Police Public Relations Office, we know these problems, but of course,
22:05you know, going out on the street, you see them at first hand.
22:08And, I mean, well, traditionally, integration is very, very difficult.
22:13We've done our best to deal with the minorities.
22:17Well, let's be, let's be honest.
22:21They haven't evolved properly, have they?
22:27Anything you do say will be taken down and used against you in evidence.
22:30Do you understand?
22:31Yeah, I understand.
22:32Right.
22:33You're Nick.
22:33Come on!
22:35Faster, you silly old cow!
22:36Come on!
22:38You know, it wasn't the young lad's fault, was it?
22:40I mean, they're minding their own business, and we went up and offended them.
22:43And thank God we had a bit of luck that the bottle missed her and hit me.
22:47Sir, I've got a lot of gay friends, okay?
22:50Now, obviously, this is being shown on television.
22:52What's it?
22:52It looks like I'm having a dig at the gay community.
22:54I know, I understand.
22:55And it's not me, it's Terry Blosh, you know?
22:57I understand, but you've got to remember that he is a senior, a very senior police officer.
23:02Yes, sir, my uncle's a senior officer, more senior than Terry Blosh, you know?
23:05I know, I know.
23:06Yeah, well, leave it to me, because I'm going to have a word with him.
23:10I don't know.
23:11Well, there's no need to raise your voice, you know?
23:13Ray, Ray, Ray, leave him, leave him.
23:15The passionate spunk of you, sir.
23:17It has to be admired.
23:19I know what you mean, sir.
23:21Well, that's a paradise.
23:23Well, then, Mark, come in.
23:24What's up to you?
23:25I've just been to, um, I just went to have a word with Terry Blosh.
23:28He was in the toilets, right, and so he touched me in sort of places I've never been touched before.
23:35Apart from the toilet?
23:37Yeah, and he'd sort of come up to me and he said he wanted me to be his bowling ball.
23:42Just to, and then he'd said he wanted to pick me up like a six-pack.
23:48There was your beer drinking there.
23:50He wanted to touch tongues, and then he'd come right up to my face and demanded to know if I
23:54was a friend of Dorothy's.
23:55I don't know, sir.
23:59Do you know, Ray?
24:00Well, there certainly isn't one in his station, sir, no.
24:03That's peculiar.
24:05Hi, James.
24:06All right, boys?
24:08Assistant Commissioner Terry Blanch has told us that if we really want to learn about racism in the police force,
24:12we've got to come to this meeting.
24:14But you can't film in here, so we'll have to catch you later, boys.
24:16All right?
24:16See you later, please.
24:18All right?
24:18Do you want to sit?
24:19Do you want to sit?
24:20All right?
24:20Yes.
24:27Well, it started off quite violently, really.
24:30Yeah.
24:31Well, I found that when they spat in our faces, it was a bit hard to take.
24:35But the worst bit was when they pushed us on the floor and started hitting us about the head with
24:38trunctions.
24:39It sort of was a bit sore.
24:40But then we recognised them.
24:42Yeah.
24:42They were all off-duty policemen.
24:44And then they recognised us as policemen.
24:46It was a bit of a laugh after that, really.
24:48Oh, no, no.
24:48That's a good tune.
24:49Yeah, good tune.
24:52That video is a bit weird, though, isn't it?
24:54St George and the slaying of the black dragon.
24:57I found it a bit weird.
24:58It's quite allegoric, isn't it?
25:00Terra Blanche's version of community policing has not gone down well with the good guys.
25:06Terra Blanche is a little bit...
25:08Doolally.
25:09What, doolally and fascist, really, isn't it?
25:11I mean, look at this.
25:13We look ridiculous.
25:14I'm not used to.
25:15I understand.
25:16And I think what Mr Terra Blanche has done, he has these views that are somewhat...
25:21What's the word I'm looking for?
25:23Stereotypical, sir.
25:25Stereotypical.
25:26And, quite frankly, it's made all of you look quite ridiculous.
25:29Well, he's dressed me up more like, you know, Dick Whittington than someone that'd be selling
25:34the big issues.
25:35So I'll stand out like a sore thumb.
25:37I think Terra Blanche has got it all wrong.
25:39To be honest, the whole thing's a pantomime.
25:40Look at you two.
25:41The dames.
25:42Yeah, but that's down to Terra Blanche.
25:43I don't know.
25:44No, it's all right.
25:45But also, he's with you.
25:46So let's take all your points.
25:50What I'm going to do is call head office now and sort Mr Terra Blanche out once and for
25:56all.
25:57Well, it's now transpired that Assistant Commissioner Terra Blanche was quite mad.
26:03Barking and dagging him.
26:05And certified by the same.
26:07So he's gone off now by to South Africa.
26:10Hey, bud.
26:11Hey, bud.
26:12However, there is one legacy of Terra Blanche's reign that still needs to be addressed.
26:18Come out of here.
26:18Turn around.
26:19Face to the others because this is about you to...
26:21Oof.
26:21Can you smell it?
26:22Can you smell it?
26:22You know what that smell is?
26:23That is...
26:24Oof.
26:24That is the stench of a gambling addiction.
26:28This man is a gambler.
26:30Oof.
26:30Can you smell it?
26:31Yes.
26:31It stinks, doesn't it?
26:32Make your pardon, sir.
26:33This is a nun man.
26:34Shh, shh.
26:34I'm talking.
26:35This is an insect.
26:36This is the filth on the bottom of your shoe we're looking at right now.
26:40We learned an awful lot last week about prejudice, about racism, sexism, homophobia, all sorts
26:46of bigotry.
26:47But what we need to do today is to take on another problem.
26:51The one of the horrible, disgusting, oof, gambling addiction.
26:57And we're going to do that.
26:58We're going to help Bones because we care.
27:00And because we can do it.
27:02Okay?
27:04Everybody outside in five minutes.
27:05Coat's on.
27:06Calm down there.
27:07Come on, Bones.
27:07Chop, chop.
27:12Starts with this.
27:14One pound coin.
27:17And you lose your shirt.
27:18Then your house.
27:19Then your family.
27:21Then your career.
27:22And all to win what?
27:24A measly 15 pounds.
27:27It isn't worth it.
27:30No!
27:31No!
27:32I don't know, do I?
27:33I haven't done it before.
27:34In my mother's purse, it's usually on the kitchen table.
27:38You'll find some calls.
27:40She's nodding at the moment.
27:41Okay.
27:42Sir, look, we've been here a while now.
27:43Don't you think we should go?
27:44Don't worry.
27:45Oi, oi, oi.
27:46Sorry, my love.
27:46No, we're playing this one.
27:49That's all right.
27:50Not that.
27:51No, no, no, no, no, no.
27:52No, sorry.
27:53How many machines are you playing, then?
27:55We've got three here.
27:56Three?
27:57Yeah.
27:57Listen, if you just go and play on this one.
27:59Go and sit over there, will you?
28:00Desaad, can we throw a cordon round these machines, please?
28:04Ray, Ray.
28:05Sir?
28:05This book is racist.
28:07It is racist in the extreme.
28:09I've been through it with a fine tooth comb,
28:11and there is not one single gollywog in it anywhere.
28:16It's outrageous.
28:17They're airbrushing history.
28:19I can't believe it.
28:20Get another book.
28:21Let's check it.
28:22But it's absolutely true.
28:23Every gollywog has simply been spirited away.
28:26And I'm not having it.
28:27Find another book.
28:28I'm gonna get you.
28:32Ready all night, here I come.
28:35I'm gonna get you.
28:39Ready all night, here I come.
28:42I'm gonna get you, get you, get you.
28:49Get you.
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