- 2 days ago
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00:00On the Dukes of Hazard, Hazard County's had its ups and had its downs, but ain't nothing
00:07like when Jude Emery comes to town.
00:12We got a rattlesnake up here in the front.
00:14Don't let it back here.
00:15There ain't room.
00:17Here y'all are looking for hot drivers.
00:22Follow me!
00:24Stop them!
00:25I think y'all are all crazy.
00:30Just a good old boy
00:36Never meaning no harm
00:40Beats all you've never saw
00:44Been in trouble with the law since the day they was born
00:47Straightening the curves
00:50Flatening the hills
00:56Someday the mountain might get them, but the law never will
00:59Making their way
01:03The only way they know how
01:06That's just a little bit more than the law will allow
01:12Just a good old boy
01:15Wouldn't change if they could
01:19Fighting the system like a two modern-day Robin Hood
01:25Welcome again to Hazard County
01:32Hazard is a pleasant little spot where several southern states come together
01:35That's all I'm allowed to tell you cause everybody would want to go there
01:41But its location is how come a very unusual character showed up
01:46Named Jude Emory
01:48Uh, that ain't Jude
01:50That's, uh, Deputy Angus
01:52And, of course, neither one of them's Jude
01:57They're the Duke boys
01:59And that ain't Jude
02:03That's Sheriff Grady Byrne
02:05But hang on, old Jude will be a long record
02:11You got it
02:21That's Jude
02:22You better step on it, Bo, when the siren's creeping up on us
02:40Hey, listen, if we can get this in under a minute or a half, we're making a record
02:44Here you go, Vickis
02:46You lose a horse and find a saddle
03:00Neither
03:01My pickup truck broke down
03:02I didn't want to leave the saddle in the back
03:04Did I lift?
03:05Yeah, it'd be much black
03:06Hey
03:07In the window
03:11Sounds just like Merle Haggard, don't he?
03:14All right, hit it, cousin
03:16Thank you for the lift
03:25Don't mention it
03:26Looks like you have to stop at mid-chase to do it
03:28Being chased by the county sheriff ain't no reason I could be never leaving
03:34You, uh, want to tell me what you did so I can start worrying?
03:39Nope
03:39Uh-huh
03:41Hey, there's Russell Road up ahead
03:43Let's confuse them
03:44Well, at least we cut them down to half
03:55You can let me out anywhere along in here, Vickis
03:58Stranger, this might ruin your whole day
04:06If the only people know this county, I used to do my courting right here
04:15Here?
04:16Yeah, I'll get everybody out
04:18Hey, Luke
04:19Hey, Enos
04:20Hands on top of the car
04:22You too, boy
04:23What's your name?
04:25Jude Emery
04:26Sheriff, he's got a bulge
04:29A bulge?
04:30Okay, put them hands up
04:31I'm just, uh
04:33Now, you hush
04:33Spread them
04:34You're in trouble
04:34I just
04:37Hush
04:37Well, now, you in trouble with me and Hazard County
04:40That's what you are
04:40See, Sheriff, I told you you had a bulge
04:42Uh-huh
04:43Now, you got a permit for that, boy?
04:45As a matter
04:45Hush
04:46Now, as for you Duke boys
04:49Consortin' with this scroungy-lookin' dude
04:51Yeah, just
04:51With a gun and a guitar
04:53Well, everybody is goin' to jail
04:55Jude
04:59Welcome to Hazard County
05:01And this here weirdo vagrant
05:05Was packin' a 38 special
05:07But I got a
05:07Ah, that's up
05:08And a guitar
05:10Is that a crime?
05:11Depends on how you play it
05:13And that ain't all
05:15Luke Duke was armed with a ball-o' pocket knife
05:18Grady, that there knife couldn't cut cold grits
05:21Well, that don't matter
05:22That is still a lethal weapon
05:23Ha-ha
05:24I got him, boss
05:25Oh, I got him
05:26Well, Sheriff, he's got another bulge, yeah?
05:29Excuse me
05:30Oh, well
05:32Now, I bet you
05:33This ain't filled with no rabbit tobacco
05:35Ha-ha
05:35Bet you it's filled with a
05:36Badge
05:38A badge
05:39See, I told you
05:41You had another bulge
05:41Sergeant Jude Emory
05:44Texas Ranger
05:47Congratulations, Sheriff
05:49You just arrested the fuzz
05:51Greedy
05:52Oh, wait, now
05:53Uh, Enos
05:54Why, why didn't you tell me
05:56About that bulge first?
05:58Oh, a Texas Ranger
05:59I, uh, well
06:00Why didn't you say somethin'?
06:02I tried to, Hoss
06:03But you kept yellin' hush
06:04Well, what are you doin'
06:05Comin' through these parts?
06:07Mr. Ranger
06:08Just call me Jude
06:09I'll show ya
06:12Sure beats packin' a suitcase, don't it?
06:25There you are
06:26Wanted Russell Snake Harmon
06:31For hijackin' and runnin' contraband
06:33Yep
06:33I've tracked him from Texas to Hazard
06:36Russell Snake Harmon
06:37Who's that?
06:38Never heard of him
06:39He's here, all right
06:40See, back in Texas
06:42Old Snake had a group
06:43Called the Road Gang
06:44A bunch of lead foots
06:45Who would drive anything, anywhere
06:47For the right price
06:48Oh, that's Snake Harmon
06:51Yeah, we busted the gang
06:52But old Snake slipped away
06:53And, and you think he came here?
06:55Yeah, I'm sure of it
06:56See, the word is
06:58That Snake has come south
06:59So he could recruit
07:00A new road gang
07:00Using moonshine runners
07:02And outlaw race drivers
07:04Boy, we ain't heard nothin'
07:06Huh
07:06Nice try, though
07:08He picked Hazard
07:09Cause it was centrally located
07:10We even know where he's holed up
07:12While those extradition papers
07:14Are being processed
07:15I'm gonna go pick him up
07:16Well, where is he?
07:18A place called Uchi Swamp
07:19Well, Mr. Henry's saying
07:22A place called Uchi Swamp
07:23Is like saying
07:24Somewhere in the Amazon jungle
07:25That big?
07:26That bad
07:27There's a lot of dirt roads down there
07:29That don't lead nowheres
07:30A stranger going in there
07:31Trying to find anything
07:32He's bound to get lost
07:33Especially with all that quick sand
07:35Yeah, the Duke family
07:36Used to run a lot of moonshine
07:37Through there
07:37Seems to me
07:38We never got caught
07:39In a Uchi Swamp
07:40Sounds like you boys
07:42Know the lay of it pretty good
07:43Yes, sir, we do
07:44How'd you two like to be my guides
07:47While I try to find old Snake?
07:49That is, if I can talk the sheriff here
07:50Into letting you go
07:51Let him go?
07:52So I don't press charges
07:53Against him for false arrest
07:55Let him go!
07:57Mr. Emery
07:58Jude
07:58You got yourself a couple of guides
08:01Partner?
08:02Well, Mr. Ranger
08:03I guess you'll be needing
08:05Some help on this case
08:06I've always admired
08:07To be a Texas Ranger
08:08Mr. Jude
08:09But we ain't got any hearing hazard
08:11Well, of course
08:12We ain't got any hearing hazard
08:13This ain't Texas
08:14Now, boys
08:16You realize it's kind of hard
08:17To become a Ranger
08:18I mean, there ain't but 94 Rangers
08:20In all
08:21For all of Texas?
08:22In all the 50 states
08:23See, we go anywhere
08:24We got a warrant
08:25I'd sure like to apologize
08:27For arresting you
08:28But when I found that gun
08:29Oh, forget it
08:30This old gun don't work anyway
08:32I only carry it
08:34Cause the rules say I have to
08:36See, the way I figure it
08:38Is if the gun don't work
08:40I have to come up with something
08:41Where people don't get hurt
08:42Especially me
08:43Keeps me on my toes
08:45You know, Mr. Emery
08:46You ain't exactly how I picture
08:49A Texas Ranger
08:50Yeah, a lot of folks say that
08:52But just cause I cut it
08:53A little differently
08:54Don't mean I can't cut it
08:56Now, if you'll get started
08:57On those extradition papers
08:58Me and the boys here
08:59Gonna go snake hunting
09:00Oh, uh, Sheriff
09:02Better make some extra room
09:04In that jail of yours
09:05There's about half a dozen
09:06Of them in the gang
09:06Well, how are you
09:08Gonna get the whole gang?
09:12One gang
09:13One Ranger
09:14Y'all take care
09:16Something else, ain't he?
09:22Yeah, that's him
09:23Judy Emery
09:24Just like I figured
09:25He sure don't look like much
09:26Snake
09:27Yeah, but he sticks like molasses
09:28That boy's been dogging me
09:29For two years
09:30Every time I settle somewhere
09:32I put a little watch
09:33On the courthouse
09:33Cause I know he's gotta
09:34Get them extradition papers
09:36Who's that with him?
09:37The Duke boys
09:38I've raced against them on dirt
09:40Strictly amateur hot dogs
09:42All right
09:42Sounds like they beat you
09:43They local hazard boys?
09:46Yeah
09:46Ex-moonshine drivers
09:48What you reckon Jude's
09:49Doing with them?
09:51He's probably using them
09:51To scout the area
09:52Looking for me
09:53Old Jude is strange
09:55But he ain't dumb
09:56What you say
09:58We recruit them hazard boys?
10:01Snake
10:01Them boys ain't
10:02Nothing but trouble
10:03Looking for hot drivers?
10:04What if they're working with Jude?
10:05Well, it'd be the perfect way
10:07To keep track of him
10:07We let them think
10:09To join the gang
10:09And if things get tough
10:11We hold them as insurance
10:12Against Jude playing policemen
10:14Now he's here
10:16I feel a lot safer
10:17In the swamp
10:17Let's go
10:18Wait a minute
10:19I know he usually works alone
10:21But he might pull the local sheriff
10:22In on this one
10:23What's he like?
10:24Don't worry
10:24Waiting to meet that guy
10:26Grady
10:30If a man don't grow
10:32He dies
10:33Oh, now boss
10:35Them's another one of your hard sayings
10:37Yes, sir
10:37Grow or die, Grady
10:38When I got growing pains
10:41I can tell you
10:42On account I got dreams
10:44Dreams are getting bigger
10:47Growing richer
10:49Giving my orders
10:50And
10:52By controlling Snake's road gang
10:54And running all that contraband
10:56That could be a giant steer
10:58Oh, it's the American dream, boss
11:01Yeah, that's it
11:02American dream
11:03But, uh, boss
11:04That snake's as good as God
11:07I mean, I'm gonna go into that
11:09UG swamp myself
11:10And track him down for you
11:12Grady, you couldn't catch a catfish
11:14In a coffee cup
11:15The only way
11:17You're gonna catch Snake
11:18Is by following them Duke boys
11:20And that guitar-picking ranger
11:22And grab Snake
11:23Before he does
11:24Get me
11:24Gotcha
11:25Oh, that'll burn him up, boss
11:27Yeah
11:28You know
11:29In all of my years
11:31Of running shine
11:32I never was
11:33Chased by a Texas ranger
11:36And had I ever been caught
11:38I'd have been proud
11:39Here, have a hot one
11:41If it had been a Texas ranger
11:43Me too
11:45Say, Jude
11:47How do you figure
11:48Old Snake knows his way around
11:49At UG swamp anyhow
11:50With all the recruiting
11:51He's been doing locally
11:52Probably somebody in the gang
11:53Knows about it
11:54Well, now
11:55When you come across him
11:57Ain't that gang of his
11:58Gonna give you a lot of trouble
12:00Once I get the drop on Snake
12:01They'll probably stay cool
12:02They haven't done anything
12:04Snake's the one I'm after
12:06That sounds like
12:07A simple enough plan
12:08Yeah, that's about the only kind
12:09I ever come up with
12:10I'm just kind of edgy
12:13Including you boys
12:14Well, you ain't never caught him
12:17By yourself in two years
12:18And now you got
12:19Got Luke and me to help
12:20Yeah, and if you and me
12:22And Bo can't handle it
12:23We got help
12:23Who?
12:24The sheriff?
12:28The sheriff?
12:30No
12:30Us dukes
12:32The family
12:36Well, I do appreciate that
12:39And I'm gonna need your help
12:40But not Daisy
12:42Why not?
12:44Well, Snake Harmon
12:45Ain't exactly John Dillinger
12:46But he is dangerous
12:47Now, back in Texas
12:49We might work a woman to death
12:50But we don't expose him to danger
12:52I see
12:53Why do you call Snake?
13:01Come on, son
13:02What's the matter?
13:05Huh?
13:09Well, I know what the matter is
13:10I asked you not to feed Elmer
13:13And you fed him
13:15I said you could feed Cleo
13:17I asked you not to feed Elmer
13:19I'm sorry, Snake
13:20But sometimes I can't tell him apart
13:22Elmer's the boy
13:24It ain't that easy, Snake
13:26Come on, if you ain't the dumbest
13:29I wanted him hungry
13:32It's lazy when he eats
13:34Yeah, Elmer
13:41That's my boy
13:44Come on
13:45I got a job for you to do
13:48Well, now we know why
13:50They call him Snake
13:51Friends, this one's gonna be a zinger
13:54Cowboy
14:05Cowboy
14:05I don't see
14:07How in the heck
14:08You made it all the way here
14:09From Texas and that thing
14:10I had the wind behind me
14:12She got a lot of miles on her
14:14Ain't she?
14:14Oh, yeah
14:15She's old Korean war surplus
14:18But she has got more character
14:20Than any horse I ever rode
14:21Say, say, Judy
14:23If you got this here truck
14:24Then why do you carry that saddle around with you?
14:26If you were driving around in this thing
14:27Wouldn't you want to have a backup system?
14:29I reckon we could use a backup system
14:31To help us find old Snake
14:32Yeah, we could drive around
14:34Looking for him in that swamp
14:35Till you're ready to retire
14:36But me and Bo think
14:37It might be a better idea
14:38To let Snake find us
14:39Now, why would he want to do that?
14:41Well, he said he's looking for moonshine runners
14:42And race car drivers
14:43Now, didn't he?
14:44Now, how would he react
14:45If word got out to Duke boys
14:47That's coming out of retirement?
14:48Well, I don't know how he'd react
14:50With y'all Uncle Jesse's
14:51Skin y'all alive
14:52If you'd get the Federals on your tail again
14:53Well, looky here, Patch
15:06If it ain't the Chicken Dukes
15:09You heard of them, ain't you?
15:12Nope
15:12Huh?
15:14They got scared out of driving whiskey
15:16Now they mostly hang around race tracks
15:18Hoping to be mistook for real drivers
15:20Well, Willie
15:21Say, when'd you get out of jail, son?
15:23Well, he had to go to jail, Bo
15:24It's the only way he'd get to see his mama
15:26Uh-huh
15:27How come y'all ain't home chopping cotton?
15:31Last time you drove on a racetrack
15:33You nearly got a ticket for illegal parking
15:35Oh, now, Willie
15:36Now, wasn't that the time
15:37That you got in front of me
15:38And I had to kind of push you off
15:40And you went into the pits?
15:41I'd like to see you try that with him
15:42Meet Patch Loring
15:44He's been barred from every track in the country
15:50Hey, I heard of you
15:52I didn't know they piled dirty driving that high
15:55You ain't heard nothing like it is
15:58I'm looking for driving talent
16:01For an old boy that's trying to put something together
16:03You two ain't much, but
16:05You interested?
16:08Okay, what you got, Willie?
16:10I ain't got nothing
16:11Plus, you can really cut it
16:13If y'all want to talk about it some more
16:15Meet me at the old coffin factory early tomorrow morning
16:17Take you that long to find it
16:20Catch in church
16:23He said they were talking about
16:32And they'd slide right into our lap
16:34With that kind of luck
16:35You boys ought to be gamblers
16:36Or lawmen
16:38Nah, we're just lucky enough just being dukes
16:41They went for it
16:45You good?
16:53Gracias
16:53Yeah, cousin
16:55Thank you
16:56Oh, thank you, honey
17:05Boys, I don't see why I have to ride in a car anyway
17:11If we was back in Texas
17:12I'd follow you in another car
17:14Now, look, you ain't back in Texas
17:15You're in Hazard
17:16Now, you get yourself lost in that Uchi swamp
17:18You ain't gonna be able to find your butt with both hands
17:21See, what Luke and me figured we'll do
17:23Is we'll start a fight
17:25We're real good at starting fights
17:26You got that right
17:28Anyways, we ought to be able to get their attention
17:30So you can slip out of the car and nab old snake
17:32You see, you sure as heck don't want to get caught in the back of this thing
17:34Okay
17:36You boys get me the snake any way you can
17:39Hey, Cooter
17:40Make room for my guitar
17:47Guitar
17:48Guitar
17:50Yeah, climb on back in here and I'll cut out some more space
17:53Guitar
17:54Uh-huh
18:00Mm-hmm
18:01Mm-hmm
18:02Oh, now them dukes is up to no good
18:05Just as sure as a hog loves turnips
18:08But don't worry, boy
18:10I'm bringing snake in
18:12Just as soon as I get me a car
18:15Well, where's your sheriff's car?
18:16Well, Cooter's fixing it
18:18Well, then use your personal car, Stonehead
18:20Well, I ain't got one
18:22Huh?
18:23What's that?
18:24I ain't got one
18:25Well, how do you get to work?
18:27Well, I thumb
18:29I hitchhike every place
18:30Greedy
18:31You can't follow them Duke boys
18:33Hitchhacking
18:34Ah, you're right
18:35Now, they might spot me
18:36Of course, it would be real slick if they gave me a ride
18:40You'd still lose them
18:42So I could borrow your car
18:44Oh, sure
18:45White hood, horns and all
18:46Well, that leaves my mama's car
18:49Your mama's car?
18:52Of course, if I get one little dent in it
18:54Well, she'll be chewing my tail
18:55Till Gabriel's trumpet
18:57Greedy, you got no idea what a comfort it is
19:01Just knowing you're a sheriff around here
19:04Now, that night while the boys and Cooter
19:09Was working on putting a plan together
19:11Daisy and Jude, uh, well, you'll see
19:14The purest eyes
19:19And the fairest hands
19:22I love the ground whereon she stands
19:28Black, black, black
19:32Is the color of my true love's hair
19:40You sure sing pretty for a cowboy, Chad
19:48Guitar sounds a whole lot better without the socks in it
19:51You want some more peach pie?
19:55No, no, thanks
19:56You know, lady, your cooking is downright scary
20:02Is that good or bad?
20:04When a beautiful woman can also cook, that's good
20:06And that's bad
20:21I still want to go with you tomorrow
20:23No
20:24I don't want to be distracted worrying about you
20:27Worried about me
20:30Worried about me?
20:33I can probably out drive and out shoot you
20:36That's probably true
20:37I'm a bad driver, my gun don't work
20:39And you still ain't going
20:40Anybody who'd bet on that
20:48Would bet against the next sunrise
20:50Night
20:54And a little after sunrise
21:00Things were really humming down at the hazard garage
21:02Y'all set back there, Jude?
21:06Let her rip
21:06If y'all figure Daisy's gussied up just for Jude
21:12You're wrong
21:13Cooter, it works
21:16Of course it works
21:16Works better than I thought it would
21:18Don't think we're going to have any trouble following them at all
21:21Hey, I got something to show you
21:23Well, let's go, honey
21:24Never bet against Daisy when she makes her mind up
21:26Although Jude didn't know it, Daisy was in on the party
21:29I promise you I'm going to take good care of it
21:31Can you just do me one favor?
21:36Yeah
21:37And keep this thing between the ditches
21:39You got it, honey
21:40Mother dog
21:49Oh, what a tangle web we weave
21:54When first we practice to deceive
21:56And that's obtuse
21:58Yeah, I figured old Grady was about to do
22:03And ain't mama's car or something
22:05Now, I want y'all to watch some slick shucking
22:10Now you see, Luke
22:12And now you don't
22:17Now, Luke, I told you
22:22Old Willie be looking the wrong way again
22:24No wonder he can't handle it when a car's on his tail
22:36Ain't them boys slick
22:38I'd invite you to have a beer
22:42But it would lower my social standing
22:44You'd have to go all the way to hell and do that
22:47Well, I ain't proud
22:49I'll drink with anybody
22:50Say, where's your boss?
22:55You won't meet him unless you pass the test
22:57Where's Patch?
22:59He's the test
23:00Patch is somewhere on South 104 waiting for you
23:13If I'd sure I wouldn't keep him waiting long
23:15Might make him more under than he is
23:17Thanks anyway
23:19Catch you later
23:21Well, that depends on Patch
23:23Now, the boys and Jude didn't any more than get out of Willie's sight
23:31When they were immediately followed by
23:33Willie
23:36Who wanted to watch the Dukes against Patch
23:38And all of them were followed by
23:40The intrepid Grady in his mama's car
23:43Who was followed by
23:45Daisy
23:46Y'all following this?
23:47Daisy didn't know that the car that she was following was Grady
23:50She thought he was one of the gang
23:52And I'll just be dogged if another car didn't start tailing Bo and Luke
23:57Guess who?
24:09Yeah, that's the man's
24:12Yeah, that's the man's
24:12Well, shit, so far I don't see nothing to Patch's test
24:26Seems like a little kiddie game to me
24:27Playing a little bumper tag is off
24:37Great
24:37Being a little bitaby
24:38Back
24:42Five
24:42Five
24:47Five
24:47Six
24:48Nine
24:48Eight
24:49Seven
24:50Cin Nike
24:51pointer
24:51Final
24:54None
24:55Six
24:56None
24:56Ce
24:57Nine
24:58Two
24:59Eight
24:59They're
24:59ă
25:07Old Grady was having so much fun
25:18watching the game that he didn't even notice
25:21Daisy was on his tail
25:22Since Daisy didn't know there was Grady
25:24that was in front of her, she thought the odds
25:26were 3-1 against Bo and Luke
25:37Do you reckon the General's back bumper is going to stay on?
25:40I don't know, sounds like we picked up a new wreck
25:43Gravel
25:46Oh don't move, just listen to me
25:48I'm down by the brick bed
25:55Now don't move
25:57Uh, I ain't gonna move but I'm fixing to make a new door here
26:00And there's the test
26:01If he keeps bumping and jarring us like that
26:03it's bound to rattle that snake and he's gonna strike
26:07Now how'd you like to be in the car with a rattlesnake
26:10and all the doors welded shut?
26:28Well what are we gonna do?
26:29What's going on?
26:30We got a rattlesnake up here in the front
26:32Well don't let it back here, there ain't room
26:34Luke, you're thinking, ain't ya?
26:36Oh yeah
26:39They like mice
26:41Will he have one on ya?
26:43Uh
26:44There ain't room for a mouse either
26:46Well think faster
26:48I got it
26:49Just don't move
26:50Be careful
26:51Don't move cousin
26:52Just keep her steady now
26:53Don't let Patch hit us no more
26:55I won't
26:56Okay
26:57Stay real steady cousin
26:58I don't wanna lose you now
26:59Baby
27:00Oh my gosh
27:01Oh my gosh
27:10Luke
27:11Can't cover his head Luke
27:16Alright, hit the brace
27:17Hit the brace
27:18Everything's okay, Jude.
27:44No, it ain't.
27:45Because down the road, Daisy had decided to even the odds by taking out one of the enemy,
27:51not knowing it was poor old Brady, who wasn't about to hurt his mama's car.
28:06Now, Willie didn't know who they were, but they sure wasn't on his side.
28:15Grady Bird, I didn't know it was you.
28:26Oh, now look at the scratch you put on my mama's car.
28:30Oh, Daisy, don't you recognize a disguise when you see one?
28:36I'm sorry, Grady Bird.
28:37Hey, Patch, how'd we do?
28:46Sorry, boy, I'm gonna stomp you into mush.
28:50Patch!
28:51Patch!
28:52Wait, Patch, where's Elmer?
28:55Who?
28:55Elmer, the rattlesnake.
28:58They throw him at me.
29:00You lost Elmer?
29:01You let him lose Elmer?
29:03Well, I never cared much for Elmer.
29:05I mean, he's always slithering around.
29:06He ain't got much to say.
29:07He's got them beady little eyes, and he ain't even a pretty coat.
29:09Snake Harmon's gonna kill us.
29:11Let's get out of here.
29:11A couple of cars were following us.
29:13Who were they?
29:13Beats me, but the way they was driving,
29:15Jude Emery must have been driving one of them
29:16because they run each other off the road.
29:18Let's go.
29:18Hey, you mean we passed?
29:19Oh, yeah.
29:21You passed, all right.
29:23All right, dog.
29:23Randy Burr, if you don't get Snake Harmon before that ranger does,
29:32I'm gonna have your ugly hide nailed to my den wall
29:35and your miserable bones ground in the fertilizer for my tomatoes.
29:41Well, that ain't nothing compared to what my mama's gonna do
29:44when she finds that scratch in the car.
29:46Oh, because I was so certain that between you and that ranger,
29:49I'd control Snake Harmon's gang,
29:52I went and contacted the syndicate boys.
29:55And now, I've got a contract to move contraband and no Snake Harmon,
30:01and you, you couldn't catch them
30:03if you was both wearing the same pair of pins.
30:05I remember once I got one little bitty dent in her car.
30:07She wouldn't let me out of the house for a week.
30:09Randy!
30:11My head is on the line to that syndicate.
30:14Excuse me, Sheriff.
30:15These here fugitive posters just came in.
30:18Oh, Enos, go paper the men's room with them.
30:20Can't you see bosses busy chewing me out?
30:22Grady Baird, the chances of you finding Snake Harmon by yourself
30:26rank right up there with Daisy Duke being made the next poop.
30:31That's funny, Mr. Hawk, because Daisy's a Methodist.
30:35Oh, Sheriff, the light bulb is burned out in the men's room.
30:38It's gonna be awful hard to read the posters in there.
30:41Oh, Enos, I'll hang them up myself.
30:43I just...
30:45Oh, my goodness.
30:47What's the matter?
30:48What?
30:49Wanted Russell Snake Harmon.
30:52He's the one that Ranger's after.
30:54And Coy Randolph and Patch Lauren
30:57for armed robbery, felonious assault, suspected homicide,
31:01believed to be part of the Snake Harmon gang.
31:04Enos, you know what this means?
31:07Yes, it means them boys are flat in trouble.
31:09Enos, it means that Jude and Luke and Bo
31:12are not dealing with a bunch of good old Ridge Runners.
31:15I mean, these are real dangerous felons.
31:18Grady Bird, you've got about as much gall as a tug full of pig's fleets.
31:23Finish tighten that up.
31:25Get out of the way, Burgette.
31:26You sell your soul to Swill at Boss Hawk's table and come, Garth, for help.
31:30Just even then, you just gotta swallow your stubbornness and you listen to me.
31:33Now, you think Bo and Luke have gone off to help capture some Texas lead foot?
31:37Look, Patch Lauren.
31:39Coy Randolph, one of her armed robbery and suspected homicide,
31:42believed to be part of the Snake Harmon gang.
31:45Now, these just ain't good old boys out to have some fun.
31:49Bo and Luke and Jude, they don't know what they're getting into.
31:52They look like a lot of fun.
32:20Aren't they, though?
32:22How many are there?
32:24I don't know.
32:25I can't count that high.
32:27Bo, we gotta come up with something to throw them off guard.
32:30We can start a fight.
32:32Right.
32:33You'd never expect that.
32:34I'm Snake Harmon.
32:37Hey.
32:39Howdy.
32:40You must be the Hazard Hot Dogs.
32:42Oh, you heard of us, huh?
32:44Hmm.
32:45Get out, plow boy.
32:48Until you learn to die.
32:49Yes, sir.
32:55I hear you boys had a little trouble with Patch here.
32:58Patch?
33:00No, Patch weren't no trouble at all.
33:01Look, if you're gonna test us, you gotta find somebody who can cut it.
33:04Listen, Snake, we'd really like to stay and fight with your boys here,
33:07but from the looks of them, I don't think any of them could handle us.
33:10At least, why is not this overgrown has-been cretin?
33:13Oh, Bruce!
33:14Look out!
33:17Go back!
33:25Go back!
33:29Go back!
33:30Oh, watch out!
33:40Rusty Snake, I arrest you in violation of the Texas Criminal Code.
33:45Hey, Jude, I'll feed you around here somewhere.
33:48Great old fight, huh?
33:52Get off of me!
33:55I said I arrest you in violation of the...
33:58Listen, are those your boys?
34:00Yeah, that one's a little slower.
34:06Yeah, he needs to work on his left hook, don't he?
34:08Yeah, sure do.
34:12I better break this up.
34:14All right, boys. All right, break it up.
34:16Hey, Bo!
34:18Bo! Bo! Bo!
34:19Bo, Bo, break it up.
34:21Hey, stop it. Stop it.
34:22All right, break it up, boys.
34:23Hey, stop it. Right there, Bo.
34:25Right there. Stay right there.
34:26You won't. Bo.
34:28All right, now, break it up.
34:29I said break it up!
34:31Now, get over there, Lou.
34:32We have him.
34:33Yeah, yeah, you done real good.
34:35All right, now, you boys just stay cool.
34:37Y'all boys ain't broke no laws.
34:39Snake here's the one I'm after.
34:41Y'all just stay cool and stay out of trouble.
34:42Oh, come on now, Jude.
34:44You ain't really gonna arrest me, are you?
34:46I didn't track you all the way from Texas for your dazzling conversation.
34:50You ain't arrestin' nobody, cowboy.
34:52Drop it.
34:53Okay, horse.
34:56But you're makin' a big mistake.
34:59No, it's your mistake, Jude.
35:00Well, that there's Corey Randolph.
35:02You remember.
35:03You sent him to prison.
35:05Is that you, Corey?
35:06Hey, Jude.
35:08I didn't recognize you under all them whiskers.
35:10I swore when you sent me up, I wasn't gonna shave till I got ya.
35:14Looks like I'm fixin' to shave.
35:16Oh, don't shave him off for me, Coy.
35:18It gives you character.
35:19Covers up all that ugly.
35:20Oh, shucks, Jude.
35:22We've been on to you since you hit, Hazard.
35:25Boys, tie up, Jude, so you can stay out of trouble.
35:28This one's mine.
35:29Wait a minute, Patch.
35:30I don't want nobody in the way.
35:31Wait, wait, wait, wait, Patch.
35:33Patch, I got a better idea.
35:34You think you can take this boy arm-wrestlin'?
35:37Texas style?
35:38What's that?
35:39You ain't gonna like it, horse.
35:42Tie him up.
35:45Now, in case you think those are just little old cactus spines, flyboy,
35:48let me educate ya.
35:50Those are called blood brothers.
35:52The reds you see drippin', that's pure poison.
35:56Once they make a puncture, they just never heal.
35:59And goin' through life with an armful of those would just be a livin' hell.
36:06Here I got it.
36:07Give me some hands.
36:10Y'all ready?
36:11Yep.
36:13Y'all set?
36:14Go.
36:14Go.
36:14Go.
36:14Go.
36:14Go.
36:14Go.
36:20Come on, Luke, come on.
36:33Turn it on, Patch.
36:35Luke.
36:46Luke.
36:47Uh.
36:49Oh.
36:54Luke!
36:55Don't go to the barn now, Paul.
36:57There ain't no tellin' how this'll come out.
36:59You wanna let me know what's happenin'?
37:00What's going on?
37:22Just be ready for a little Duke shucking and jiving.
37:24I hear y'all are looking for hot drivers.
37:26Well, you can stop looking.
37:27You want to let me know what's happening?
37:30Just stay loose, Jude.
37:34Oh, thanks.
37:35That clears it right up.
37:37I'll tell you one thing right now, Snake.
37:38I ain't driving with no woman.
37:40Well, you ain't telling nobody nothing.
37:42I'm running this rig.
37:44But we don't know nothing about her.
37:46What if she's working with Jude?
37:47So what if she is?
37:49I got plenty more snakes.
37:51Test her.
37:52Make her drive against Pat.
37:55Shoot, that ain't no test.
37:58Have her arm wrestling.
38:00Hold it, wait.
38:04Knock that off.
38:05Cut him loose.
38:06Yes, sir.
38:13Thanks, cousin.
38:14Plow boy, you've been doing all the talking while your buddy here does all the driving.
38:21Now, it's just you and me.
38:23Ain't nobody driving against nobody till me and him settles this.
38:26Yeah?
38:26What you got in mind, Patch?
38:28Head on chicken.
38:29Down on the bridge.
38:30No turns.
38:32Chicken?
38:32Snake, you should have never kidnapped that big overgrown kid out of the sixth grade.
38:37Too tough for you?
38:39Too tough?
38:39It's too stupid.
38:41Look, if you got any driving skill at all, we're gonna match jumping cars across that creek
38:47belly.
38:48That night?
38:48Well, first light then.
38:50Crack it on.
38:50I finally got it figured out.
38:53Y'all are all crazy.
38:54Well, how about it, Patch?
38:56You can even use Annie's car.
38:57My car?
39:00My car.
39:01Okay, Plow boy.
39:04You're on.
39:05Hey, hey, Luke, I got an idea.
39:07Listen, since this is just between you and Patch, why don't Snake and I make this a little
39:10more interesting?
39:10What, you mean like a little side bed or something?
39:12I know.
39:13Like we let you two go if Luke makes it and Patch don't.
39:16No, not exactly.
39:17See, what I had in mind was just for fun that you and me ride shotgun with him.
39:23Well, what's the matter, Snake?
39:24Don't you trust Patch?
39:28Well, I trust Luke.
39:31Well, it's a deal then, right?
39:34Yeah.
39:36So, first light, engines were cranked for the big jump.
39:45Come on, Patch, show that Plow boy.
39:47Come on.
40:01Easy, son.
40:04One move and I'm going to string you up like a hawk.
40:07Yeah, I'll pay real close attention because we're about to play musical chairs.
40:11Now, Sonny, when I say jump, you'll get.
40:15Otherwise, you're going to be known all over Hazard County as a fellow who lost his head in the race.
40:22Now!
40:22Bother me.
40:30Well, I'll just be dogged if Jesse and Cooter wasn't hid in Daisy's car the same way they hid old Jude and General Lee.
40:37Now, I didn't figure on that.
40:38Now, we're looking for friends.
40:39Come on, once in case you guys are, Tom ZĂ€meer, Tom ZĂ€meer, Tom ZĂ€meer, Tom ZĂ€meer, Tom ZĂ€meer, Tom ZĂ€meer, Tom ZĂ€meer, Tom ZĂ€meer.
40:43If you're always this full of surprises, your social life must be something else.
41:13How'd you do that? Honey, I've been free for about 30 minutes. I just wasn't about to miss what y'all had cooking. Some cowboy shit.
41:43Uh-huh. Looks like old Grady and the law were in on the Duke's plan, too. Now, that's a switch.
41:55Yeah, everybody out! Yeah, everybody out!
41:58Well, here we go. One snake all tied up for Ranger Emery.
42:07Okay, Jesse, I'll take charge of the prisoner now.
42:09Hey, hold on a second. Old Snake here is Jude's prisoner.
42:12I got other plans for Snake. On the corner, he ain't been extradited yet from my county. Namely, yes.
42:21Something around here stinks.
42:23Uh, boys?
42:24Oh, boys!
42:28Oh, after him!
42:29Oh, boy, get out of here!
42:40Oh, boy, get out of here!
42:50Come on, you don't get out of here!
42:55Dude, get me out of here. These folks are crazy.
42:59Yeah? Well, you kiss one of them.
43:01Here comes Grady. Cootie, you reckon the hardware you bolted on here is gonna get us across?
43:04Well, that ain't the one way to find out.
43:15Drop it right there.
43:17Okay, Enos, cup them, and don't forget to meet them. They're odds.
43:20Yes, yes.
43:21Grady! Come on, get in here.
43:24We got to go get snake harvest. We're gonna lose you.
43:26Yeah, come on.
43:27I'm coming, I'm coming.
43:28Leave them small fry behind snake harvest.
43:30Come on, we're gonna get no wish to try this small fry.
43:33Come on, let's go.
43:35We got some real nice pictures, you boys, in our restrooms.
43:38You wanna go take some more?
43:44That's for you, Luke. Now give it all you got.
43:54There ain't another road out there. We got them now.
43:56Yeah, they can be lost. You'll lose.
43:58Right. Don't agree, Luke.
44:00They can be lost. You'll lose.
44:02Right.
44:03Don't agree, Luke.
44:15Oh, here.
44:16Here, boss.
44:17Oh.
44:18Take my hand.
44:19Here, here.
44:21Yeah, here, here.
44:22Oh!
44:23Oh, boss.
44:24Woo-hoo!
44:25Stay home, stay home.
44:27You're under arrest.
44:28Hold on there, hoss. That's my prisoner.
44:30Not in my county, it ain't.
44:31That's right, Mr. Ranger.
44:33Grady is a duly constituted law here in Hazard County.
44:36Oh, what little there is of it.
44:38Now, you'd be right, boss, if this was Hazard County.
44:41Then what is it?
44:42Well, no matter how dry Hazard Creek is, it's still the county line.
44:45Woo-hoo!
44:54I'm coming. I'm coming.
44:55This is Placid, County.
44:56Well, I ain't sheriff here.
44:57Well, you ain't hardly sheriff anywhere, Grady.
44:59Excuse me, Sheriff.
45:03Well, Snake?
45:04Hey.
45:07Looks like you're all mine.
45:09I've made it, Sheriff. Oh, excuse me.
45:11Oh, excuse me.
45:14And that's the legend of how the Dukes helped capture the notorious Meg Harmon.
45:18And boss had some tall explaining to do about contraband deliveries.
45:22Grady and Enos got two wanted men.
45:25And Daisy.
45:26Do me a favor and don't promise to come back.
45:29You, uh...
45:30You don't want me to come back?
45:31Come back.
45:32Just don't make me any promises.
45:34You don't want me to come back.
45:40Woo-hoo-hoo!
45:41Yeah!
45:42Hey, hey, hey!
45:53Honey.
45:54I better get moving.
45:56I won't forget all about Texas.
46:17And Daisy got a little hooked on a stranger passing through.
46:21A stranger named Jude Emery.
46:28Bye-bye.
46:34Bye-bye.
46:43Bye-bye.
46:48Bye-bye.
46:51Bye-bye.
46:54I'm Dukes, I'm Dukes!
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