- hace 5 meses
Max and the Chief are suspiciously issued activation notices for their Naval Reserve contracts. This conveniently requires of them that they enter active duty on board a Navy ship while KAOS nefariously plans activities on the mainland. Max is an officer and the Chief is a common seaman named John Doe!
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TVTranscripción
00:00Oh, Max, what a fabulous surprise for a honeymoon.
00:06And all this time you had me thinking that you'd made reservations at the Anthracite Hotel in Pittsburgh.
00:11Oh, that was just to throw you off the track, 99.
00:14Actually, I've been planning this trip to the Caribbean all along.
00:16What's the name of the boat again?
00:18The Chiquita.
00:19That's an odd name for an ocean liner.
00:21Yes, it is, but it's a perfect name for a banana boat.
00:23A banana boat? Is that safe?
00:26Well, this boat has an excellent safety record, 99.
00:28In 40 years, it's only had one mishap.
00:31That's when it collided with a freighter carrying Corn Flakes.
00:34But that's terrible.
00:35Not really. Fortunately, a sugar boat came along.
00:39Stop worrying, 99. It's perfectly safe, and they have some very nice tourist cabins aboard.
00:43I can't believe that we're finally going to go on our honeymoon.
00:46We've done all of our assignments, and we're going to have two glorious weeks alone.
00:50What are you doing, Max?
00:51I think I packed the boat tickets in your overnight case by mistake.
00:54Oh, be very careful how you open that. That's my control luggage. It's booby-trapped.
00:5899, I'm perfectly familiar with this type.
01:05Oh, you get the door, Max. I'll look for the tickets.
01:11Who is it?
01:13Telegram.
01:14Slip it under the door.
01:15Why didn't you open the door, Max?
01:17Forget it, 99. That may be a chaos agent, and I'm not taking any chances of getting involved in a case when we're going on our honeymoon.
01:23It's a telegram.
01:25Probably someone else congratulating us.
01:28Who is it?
01:30Telegram.
01:31I've got it, but I didn't get it.
01:34Didn't get what?
01:35A tip, Max.
01:36Oh.
01:37Well, I don't have any change.
01:40I'll take a check.
01:42I'll get my purse.
01:43Uh, wait a minute.
01:44I've got a dime.
01:45Why don't you shove it under the door?
01:56Who's it from, Max?
01:59The United States Navy.
02:01My goodness.
02:02I knew you had some friends in high places, but a congratulatory note from the United States Navy?
02:07Yes.
02:08Well, it's not exactly congratulatory.
02:10Congladure.
02:11Okay.
02:12It's not what you said, 99.
02:13It's mandatory.
02:14You see, I've been called up for active reserve duty.
02:16I have to report in 24 hours.
02:19But how can they do that?
02:21What about our honeymoon?
02:22What about our cruise?
02:24Well, we can still go on the cruise, 99.
02:26How can we?
02:27Well, we'll just have to take different ships.
02:28We'll just have to take different ships.
02:58We'll just have to take different ships.
03:28Chief, you've got to help me.
03:42I'm in a lot of trouble.
03:43What trouble's that, Max?
03:44Well, 99 and I were just about to start on our honeymoon,
03:47and I got this telegram from the Naval Reserve telling me to report for duty within 24 hours.
03:52You have my sympathy, Max.
03:53Well, I need more than your sympathy, Chief.
03:55Can't you pull some strings?
03:56You've got some friends in Washington.
03:57Not enough, I'm afraid.
03:59What do you mean?
04:00I'm going with you, Max.
04:01I've been activated, too.
04:04Well, that's great.
04:05That's just great.
04:06I don't understand it, Chief.
04:07I thought that joining the Naval Reserve was part of our cover.
04:10As spies, I never dreamed that they'd call us up for active duty.
04:13Well, that's because they don't know we're spies.
04:15Control is such a super secret organization that even the Army and Navy don't know we exist.
04:18Well, I still don't think it's fair.
04:20I mean, after all, they never draft the CIA.
04:23Well, that's because the CIA isn't a secret organization.
04:26It's supposed to be, but it's not.
04:27Yes.
04:28Well, what a 99 am I supposed to do?
04:30I mean, I can't let her go on her honeymoon by herself.
04:32Well, you just have to wait until you get back.
04:34After all, Max, it's only for two weeks.
04:36After all...
04:37After all...
04:38After all...
04:39I have a bigger problem than you have.
04:41Jose Vargas is going to be in Washington this week.
04:43He'll only be here two days, and I want to be here to see him.
04:46Well, I hardly think that a Spanish flamenco dancer is more important than my honeymoon.
04:51Max, Jose Vargas is a member of the Spanish Secret Service.
04:54Well, that Jose Vargas.
04:56Well, he's a member of the SSS.
04:58The SSS, SSS.
05:00The SSS, SSS, SSS?
05:03The Spanish Secret Service Strategic Security Staff.
05:07Of course, the Spanish Security Staff.
05:09Steve, Secret Service, the Secret Spanish Staff.
05:13He's one of those Spanish spies, Chief.
05:15A fellow with a little mustache and a big chihuahua.
05:17No, Max.
05:18The little chihuahua, big mustache.
05:20His little chihuahua has a big mustache?
05:24Max, Vargas is flying in from Spain to pick up the Obermeyer file.
05:28Who's Obermeyer?
05:29Obermeyer is Chaos' number one espionage agent.
05:32They've rested him in Spain, but we have the evidence here to incriminate him.
05:35Now, Vargas is coming over here from Spain to get the evidence and take it back with him for the trial.
05:39That's why I wanted to be here.
05:41I see.
05:42Well, as long as 99 isn't going on our honeymoon, she can stay here and pick up the papers from him.
05:47Well, I'd feel a lot better if I could be here, but I guess I have no other choice.
05:51Where's my car keys?
05:53I know I had them here someplace.
05:56Uh, oh, I know where they are, Chief.
05:58Where?
05:58I packed them.
06:00Now, I'll get them for you.
06:01Max, don't open that.
06:02It's a special case.
06:03Don't worry, Chief.
06:04I know what to do.
06:05You just step back to avoid the knife.
06:13What are those?
06:14Max, it's a new escape device from the control lab.
06:17If you're trapped, you use the bubbles as you would a smoke screen.
06:19Well, what's the matter with a smoke screen?
06:21Smoke may be hazardous to your health.
06:22Oh, my God.
06:53Oh, Max, I miss you so much.
06:55I'll write to you every day.
06:56I'll write to you twice a day, 99.
06:58That'll be an awful lot of letters, Max.
07:00Yes, well, we can save them and read them on our honeymoon.
07:02It'll give us something to do.
07:05Uh, how do you like my new uniform?
07:07Oh, you look so handsome in it.
07:08Well, I guess this is it, my dear.
07:10Try to remember me, my darling, when I'm out on the briny with the salt and water in my nostrils
07:15and the giant waves dashing against the hull of the ship
07:19and the deck pitching and weaving.
07:22Beneath my feet.
07:24Max, this boat is tied up for repairs.
07:27You're not going out to sea.
07:28Oh.
07:29Yeah, too bad.
07:30I was just beginning to get my sea legs.
07:32Well, I guess this is it, dear.
07:35Anchor's away.
07:35Come on, 99.
07:41I wonder if you could get a sailor to take my bag.
08:03Excuse me, sir.
08:25We have two men on board that we haven't been notified about.
08:28These are their orders.
08:32Well, they look authentic, but I'll check them out anyway.
08:35In the meantime, don't let these men out of your sight.
08:37Assign them some minor duties to keep them busy.
08:39All right, sir.
08:40All right, sir.
08:40All right, sir.
08:40All right, sir.
08:40All right, sir.
08:40All right, sir.
08:41All right, sir.
08:41All right, sir.
08:42All right, sir.
08:43All right, sir.
08:44All right, sir.
08:45All right, sir.
08:46All right, sir.
08:47All right, sir.
08:48All right, sir.
08:49All right, sir.
08:50All right, sir.
08:51All right, sir.
08:52All right, sir.
08:53All right, sir.
08:54All right, sir.
08:55All right, sir.
08:56All right, sir.
08:57All right, sir.
08:58All right, sir.
08:59All right, sir.
09:00All right, sir.
09:01All right, sir.
09:02All right, sir.
09:03All right, sir.
09:04All right, sir.
09:05All right, ma'am.
09:18I'm in charge of this detail.
09:21Hanson Maxwell Smart.
09:23United States Naval Reserve.
09:25Now, you men probably think that just because we're not going to sea
09:29and because I'm on temporary duty here,
09:31that this is going to be a soft touch.
09:34Why are you wrong?
09:35Now, hear this.
09:36I intend to run a taut ship
09:38because a taut ship is a happy ship,
09:42whereas a loose ship,
09:45eh, leaks a lot.
09:48Now, this is what will be known as a PD detail.
09:53Now, for those of you who are summertime sailors,
09:56you're probably not familiar with that expression.
09:58Well, I'll explain it to you.
10:00A PD detail is a paint detail detail.
10:05Now, man, I can't overemphasize the importance of this duty.
10:14A ship is like an iron gate.
10:16If you don't paint it,
10:18it rusts.
10:21For the next two weeks, you will be painting day and night,
10:24night and day.
10:25Except for you, of course.
10:28All right, we'll start off, sailor, with you painting the ceilings.
10:32You'll paint the decks.
10:37And when you finish painting the decks,
10:38you'll paint all the passageways on the starboard side of the ship.
10:42You'll paint all the wet paint signs.
10:45You'll follow them up,
10:46and if his wet paint signs aren't dry,
10:48you will paint wet paint signs for his wet paint signs.
10:52Now, are there any questions besides you?
10:56Sir, may I speak to you for a minute?
10:58What is it, sailor?
11:00Max, you can't show me any favoritism.
11:02It won't look right.
11:03But, Chief, I can't give you orders.
11:05You're my boss.
11:06Not for the next two weeks, Max.
11:07You give me orders, and I'll carry them out.
11:10Well, okay, if that's the way you want it, sailor.
11:12All right, then, we'll need someone
11:16for the extremely hazardous job
11:18of painting the antennas on top of that superstructure.
11:22That'll be your job, sailor.
11:42Hi, Chief.
11:44Max, I just finished painting that.
11:47You did a nice job, except for the footprints.
11:50Listen, I thought I told that tall guy to paint the decks
11:53and for you to paint the antennas on top of the superstructure.
11:55Yes, Max, I switched jobs with him.
11:57I suffer from acrophobia.
11:58Oh, fear of acrobats?
12:00No, fear of light places.
12:02What's that?
12:03Newspaper.
12:04Max, look at that.
12:05Read what it says.
12:06City councilman arrested in motel rain.
12:10No, Max, this one.
12:11Oh.
12:12Jose Vargas, famous Spanish secret service agent,
12:15signs autograph for unidentified woman
12:17fan upon his arrival in Washington.
12:19Now, look at the picture.
12:22Chief, that's a picture of 99.
12:24Yes, Max, but that's not Vargas.
12:26Well, of course it is.
12:27It says so right here.
12:28But, Max, Vargas is left-handed.
12:30That man is signing his autograph with his right hand.
12:32Don't you see, Max?
12:33Chaos knows that you and I are the only two
12:35who know who Vargas really is.
12:37They must have forged those orders
12:38to put us on this carrier
12:39and get us out of control.
12:40You're right, Chief.
12:42Obviously, they've kidnapped Vargas
12:43and put their own man in his place.
12:45If Chaos gets their hands on that Obermeyer file,
12:47Obermeyer goes free.
12:49Chief, we've got to get off this ship.
12:50Request permission to go ashore, sir.
13:00Answers are not required to ask permission to go ashore.
13:04Where do you think you're going?
13:06I'm going ashore.
13:08That's what you think.
13:09But you just said...
13:11The captain's orders are for you to remain aboard.
13:14Well, in that case, I want to see the captain.
13:16He's on the bridge and he's not to be disturbed.
13:18It's imperative that we see him immediately.
13:20I'm sorry.
13:21Well, I'm afraid I'm sorry isn't good enough.
13:23I insist upon seeing the captain.
13:25That's out of the question.
13:26But you don't understand.
13:27We have to see the captain.
13:29You can't see the captain.
13:30Very well, Lieutenant.
13:31Have it your own way.
13:36Okay.
13:36Let's go.
13:38Where are we going?
13:38You're going to see the captain.
13:40Now, why did you throw the lieutenant's hat over the board?
14:02Because we wanted to see you, sir.
14:03Well, you didn't have to do that.
14:05There's lots of other ways you could have done it.
14:07You could have short-sheeted the executive officer's bed.
14:10You could have put a blinker bulb in my nightlight.
14:13I know what we've done is a little out of line.
14:16But believe me, there was a good reason for it.
14:18And what is that?
14:18Sir, we need a helicopter.
14:20A helicopter?
14:21Yes, sir.
14:22A helicopter.
14:23Well, I'm sorry.
14:23All my helicopters are being serviced now.
14:26Oh, well, in that case, sir, we'll take a cab.
14:29Would I be meddling if I asked you men what you need a helicopter for?
14:33Yes, well, we can't tell you that now, sir.
14:35Maybe we can tell you on Monday.
14:36Monday?
14:37Well, I must say you'll pique my curiosity.
14:40Did you have a destination in mind?
14:42Sir, we must get into town.
14:43It's a matter of the utmost importance.
14:45You two have heavy dates or something?
14:47Sir, I'm breaking regulations, but under the circumstances, I have no alternative but to tell you what we are.
14:53But what are you, really?
14:54We're spies.
14:55The CIA, I suppose.
14:58No, sir.
14:58We belong to a secret organization that nobody has ever heard of.
15:01And what's that?
15:03Control.
15:03I never heard of it.
15:04See?
15:05Sir, if you can get us into town, I think I can promise you a presidential citation.
15:10With clusters.
15:10Gentlemen, I think we've discussed this long enough.
15:15I don't know what your game is, but I would like to see some identification.
15:19But we don't have any identification, sir.
15:22Well, you realize, of course, if you don't have identification, you could be in serious trouble.
15:25Sir, if we don't get a helicopter, we're in serious trouble.
15:28Well, you're not getting a helicopter.
15:30All right, sir, if that's the way you want it.
15:40Well, it worked the last time, chief.
15:44Max, throwing the lieutenant's hat overboard got us to see the captain.
15:47But throwing the captain's hat overboard was not going to get us a helicopter.
15:51Well, we know that now, but we didn't know that then.
15:55We've got to get out of here, and there is not much time.
15:57The agent who was impersonating Bargis will be picking up the Obermeyer file in two hours.
16:03I've got to come up with something.
16:04Well, if you come up with anything, clear it through me.
16:07Remember, I'm the ranking officer here.
16:11Wait a minute.
16:12I think I have an idea.
16:13Good.
16:14What is it?
16:16If I...
16:19And then you...
16:22Yeah?
16:23No, that wouldn't work.
16:24Why not?
16:25It sounded pretty good to me, chief.
16:27I've got it with the chiefs.
16:29What?
16:29I've got it.
16:31This spoon.
16:32We'll tunnel our way out.
16:33With a spoon, Max?
16:34These decks are made of steel.
16:36Well, I didn't say it was going to be easy.
16:44What are you doing?
16:45This is a diversionary, Captain Chief.
16:47I'm going to set fire to these papers,
16:49and then during the smoke and the confusion,
16:51we'll make our escape.
16:52You yell, fire.
16:56Fire!
16:56Good, chief.
16:58Keep it up.
16:59Fire!
17:00Fire!
17:04All right, now, chief.
17:05When I give the signal,
17:06you groan like you're in pain.
17:08Oh!
17:09Not yet, chief.
17:10I haven't given the signal.
17:11I know, but you're standing on my hand.
17:15Oh.
17:17Sorry about that, chief.
17:19All right, now get ready.
17:20When the guard comes through the door,
17:22I'll charge him.
17:23Are you sure you can take him alone?
17:24Are you kidding?
17:25Have you seen that little guy
17:26that's been guarding us all day?
17:27I'll break him in half.
17:29Okay.
17:30Start moaning.
17:31Oh!
17:34Oh!
17:35Help!
17:36Help!
17:36There's a sick man in here.
17:38He's dying!
17:39Oh!
17:41Oh!
17:42Oh!
17:43Oh!
17:43Oh!
17:43Oh!
17:43Oh!
17:43Oh!
17:43Oh!
17:43Oh!
17:44Oh!
17:44Oh!
17:44Oh!
17:44Oh!
17:44Oh!
17:44Oh!
17:44Oh!
17:45Oh!
17:45Oh!
17:45Oh!
17:45Oh!
17:45Oh!
17:46Oh!
17:46Oh!
17:47Oh!
17:47Oh!
17:47Oh!
17:48Oh!
17:49Oh!
17:49Oh!
17:50Oh!
17:50Oh!
17:50Oh!
17:51Oh!
17:51Oh!
17:51Oh!
17:51It doesn't work.
17:52We're sunk.
17:52Don't worry, Chief.
17:53It can't miss.
17:54The keys are right on that rack against the wall.
17:56Now, all I have to do is to cast this over there and then just reel it back in.
18:05Perfect.
18:09Almost perfect.
18:21I think we may be using the wrong kind of bait, Chief.
18:27Thanks.
18:28How are we going to explain all this stuff being in here?
18:30You've got everything off the rack but the keys.
18:32Don't worry, Chief.
18:32It'll work this time.
18:35There we go.
18:37Missed again.
18:39You're right, Chief.
18:39This isn't going to work.
18:41When you can't leave the line out there, somebody will see it.
18:51Shh.
18:57Quick, in here.
19:01What are we going to do in here, Chief?
19:02We're going to look for a life raft.
19:04A life raft?
19:05What are we going to do with a life raft?
19:06We're not at sea.
19:08Max, the gangway's guarded.
19:09We'll take the life raft and throw it over the other side of the ship and row ashore.
19:13That's a good idea, Chief.
19:15Now hear this.
19:16Be on the alert for two prisoners.
19:18They have escaped.
19:19Now hear this.
19:20Be on the alert for two prisoners.
19:23Chief, look.
19:24L-16 life rafts.
19:26That's it.
19:26Get it out.
19:27Put it on the board.
19:28Oh, this.
19:31Wait a minute, Chief.
19:32This will take us all day to blow up.
19:34Max, you don't blow it up with your mouth.
19:36It inflates automatically.
19:37There's a lever on it somewhere.
19:38Oh, here it is.
19:40Don't pull it.
19:43Now hear this.
19:44Block all entrances and exits.
19:46Come on, Chief.
19:52We better get out of here.
19:53I know it.
19:56Come on, Chief.
19:57I'm coming, Max.
19:58Come on, come on.
20:00Come on, Max.
20:14Come on, Max.
20:21Here they are.
20:25There you go.
20:25Stop them.
20:26That's them.
20:31That's them.
20:31That's them.
20:33That's them.
20:52That's them.
20:52THE END
21:22I don't see them, sir.
21:27Well, I've got to be here somewhere.
21:40There they are.
21:42Hold it, you two.
21:44We've been looking for you two for over an hour.
21:47Captain, I implore you, give us two hours ashore before you throw us back in the brig.
21:50You're not going back into the brig.
21:52You're going in that helicopter.
21:56I checked out your orders, just as I suspected, they're forgeries.
22:01Now, I have no idea what this is about, but I have orders to place a helicopter at your disposal.
22:06Thank you, Captain.
22:07Let's go, Max.
22:07Jane, where are the wings?
22:14There are no wings.
22:15Forget it.
22:16Get in, Max.
22:17Come on, Max.
22:18Come on.
22:18Come on.
22:18Come on.
22:18Come on.
22:19Come on.
22:19Come on.
22:19Come on.
22:20Come on.
22:20Come on.
22:20Come on.
22:20Come on.
22:21Come on.
22:21Come on.
22:21Come on.
22:22Come on.
22:22Come on.
22:22Come on.
22:22Come on.
22:23Come on.
22:23Come on.
22:23Come on.
22:24Come on.
22:24Come on.
22:24Come on.
22:24Come on.
22:25Come on.
22:25Come on.
22:25Come on.
22:26Come on.
22:26Come on.
22:27Come on.
22:27Come on.
22:27Come on.
22:28Come on.
22:28Come on.
22:28Come on.
22:29Come on.
22:29Come on.
22:30Come on.
22:30Here's the Obermeyer file, Senor Vargas.
22:52Now, if you'll just sign this release, you can be on your way back to Spain.
22:56Hold it right there.
23:00Max, what did you do that for?
23:04Because that man is an imposter.
23:06You see, 99, the real Vargas is left-handed.
23:08And when I came in that door, this guy was signing those papers with his left hand.
23:14Left hand.
23:15Max, this is the real Vargas.
23:17I spotted the imposter at the airport immediately, and we arrested him.
23:21Sorry about that, Vargas, and welcome to Washington.
23:25Good work.
23:26Thank you, Chief.
23:27Not you, 99, for being perceptive enough to spot the imposter so quickly.
23:31Yes, well, I guess it runs in the family, Chief.
23:34Well, 99, I don't see any reason why we can't go on a honeymoon cruise now.
23:37Oh, I'm afraid we can't, Max.
23:38While you were away, I was assigned to jury duty.
23:41Oh.
23:43Well, Chief, you've got two weeks off.
23:45How'd you like to go on a honeymoon?
23:46I don't know.
23:47I don't know.
23:481nd to 5th.
23:491nd to 5th.
24:002nd to 5th.
24:03You've got two weeks off.
24:032nd to 5th.
24:052nd to 5th.
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