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26:16Giggily beyond a joke.
26:19Giggily beyond a joke.
26:21Giggily beyond a joke.
26:22Giggily beyond a joke.
26:22I thought, no, Izzy, you've got to do something about it.
26:25I'm looking at surgery options on Google.
26:2712 grand.
26:28Can't afford it.
26:29Gonna have to start exercising.
26:32On Friday, it was down to BBC News
26:34to take us into the long weekend.
26:37Everybody calm.
26:38Everyone stay calm.
26:39We've got the news.
26:40Yeah.
26:40We're going to learn something.
26:41Settle into a bank holiday.
26:43Yeah.
26:43Izzy, what are these?
26:452018 has called.
26:47It wants its curtains back.
26:48I know.
26:49I've just taken them out of my bedroom.
26:52They're shocking, aren't they?
26:53What, in the crushed velvet?
26:55What, in the 2018 Miracrome furniture is going on here?
27:00Yeah.
27:00Now, many of us may be trying our hands
27:03at a bit of DIY this bank holiday weekend.
27:06See, I'm not exclusive to bank holiday weekend for my DIY.
27:10It's seven days a week, 365.
27:13Well, 364, I don't do Christmas Day, obviously, as you know.
27:18And ahead of it, the Flatpak World Championships.
27:21So you've got to go through the Flatpak Regionals.
27:24Yeah.
27:26It's an annual event and it sees competitors race to assemble furniture in record time.
27:31There's nothing in record time, is there doing Flatpak furniture?
27:34No.
27:34No, they ain't big.
27:35Sexual old bastard day.
27:36But if you're delighted by dowels bonkers about brackets, or you actually know which way
27:40round the instructions need to be, this contest is for you.
27:43The last thing I built was a five by five Clalax.
27:48Oh.
27:49That's the biggest of the Clalax ranges.
27:51Oh, God.
27:52The ultimate relationship test, now a world championship.
27:55What a brilliant idea for something constructive.
27:58This is when a husband and wife have built a few bits in the house and go...
28:02We could do this professionally.
28:04You build a bookcase and then a bedside table, but against the clock and with an audience.
28:11I can't imagine the audience is massive.
28:14You've got more people on stage than you do in the audience.
28:16Do you reckon they sell out tickets?
28:17Yeah, yeah.
28:18What are you up to this weekend?
28:19Can I have a box?
28:22Warehouse worker Hayley will be competing as the reigning champ, for now.
28:25Is that what you got to win?
28:29Do you get a golden Allen key?
28:30So you got the golden.
28:31That's the trophy.
28:32She knocked up a table in nine minutes, 33 seconds last time around.
28:36Oh, my God, Hayley.
28:37That would have been nine hours for me.
28:39Yeah, nine days for me.
28:40And even has her own flat pack support business.
28:43I bet she's really popular.
28:45Three, two, one, go!
28:48Come on, girl.
28:50Intense hammering and twisting.
28:52Everyone hoping someone else would screw up.
28:54Oh, look at that.
28:56Multitasking, reading the instructions, screwing and getting the next piece out.
29:00I do believe we might have someone into the final straight.
29:06She's done the draws already?
29:09Hooray!
29:10Yes!
29:11She's done it again.
29:12To the winner, the spoils.
29:14Or, more appropriately, the golden hex key.
29:16Hex key?
29:17It's not called a hex key.
29:19It is called an Allen key.
29:20And, let's be honest, a lot of phone calls from friends and family desperate for assembly assistance.
29:26Pay them all off.
29:28Unless you're paying, I'm not interested.
29:30I actually would think I'd do all right there.
29:32I reckon so, is it?
29:33Most of my house is made of flat park.
29:35Huh?
29:36Couch.
29:36Flat park.
29:38What else?
29:39Flat park.
29:40OK.
29:42Yep.
29:43Keep going.
29:44Flat park.
29:47In Surrey.
29:48Mum, we went to go and see Judy Love the other day.
29:51We did.
29:51And it was really good.
29:53But?
29:54You are terrible at directions.
29:56Sarah, her husband Andre and their daughter Shay.
30:01Because whenever you're with me or with Dad, Mum just goes off into another world in another
30:06cuckoo land.
30:07Mum doesn't know what's going on.
30:09Mum's not bothering.
30:10You have to make sure Mum doesn't get hit by cars.
30:11You have to tell Mum, no, move over there, Mum.
30:15No, Mum, the queue's over there.
30:16The bathroom's...
30:17Mum just goes about life.
30:18Shay!
30:19Soft life!
30:20That is your Mum!
30:23This week, the spooks from Widows Bay were giving us the willies again on Apple TV.
30:29I can't believe we're watching this again.
30:31My anxiety is being up here as it is.
30:33It's going to be after this.
30:35If anyone deserves to get haunted, it's you.
30:37Because you're such a sceptic with it.
30:39Dad, please don't haunt me.
30:40Or, if you're going to haunt me, make sure I'm dressed.
30:45Do you know what spooks me at the minute?
30:49Hugh walking in my bedroom on the night, I just see his tiny shadow.
30:54Honestly, Abi, it's horrible.
30:56You can hear his foot's up like this.
31:01It's horrible.
31:02Thank you.
31:03In the programme, Mayor Tom was trying to convince the locals that there was no such thing as ghosts.
31:10We have a new chapter now and there is nothing wrong with that inn.
31:15A lot of bad things have gone down there.
31:17Yes, that's true.
31:19But it doesn't make it haunted.
31:21I would never put anyone in danger.
31:23Why don't you stay there?
31:24Yeah, if you really don't think it's haunted and there's nothing wrong with it,
31:27why don't you go and keep there for the night?
31:29And if you give me a ring, I'll come and stay there and bring all my ghost hunting equipment.
31:33OK, I'll do it.
31:34Good on you, Tom.
31:35If that's what it takes, I will stay there tonight.
31:39Ooh.
31:40See, if he does stay, he'll shut him all up.
31:42He should spend time in that crawl space.
31:45Oh, spend time in the crawl space.
31:48Isn't the crawl space the bit that's under the house?
31:50OK, I'll do it.
31:51But when I do, all this talk stops, right?
31:56Well, fair comment.
31:58Would you do it?
31:59No.
32:00Not even for money?
32:01Maybe.
32:02How much we're talking?
32:04Later, we saw Tom arrive at the Creepy Inn.
32:12Oh, has he heard something?
32:14Oh.
32:19What is it, Joey?
32:20Listen.
32:20Is that music?
32:22Can hear stuff.
32:25Oh, it's people screaming.
32:27I think when you hear screaming in an air vent at a hotel,
32:29it's pretty normal just to mind your own business.
32:33Oh!
32:37Is that a footstep?
32:38Yeah.
32:39Sounds like someone's going up the stairs.
32:42Someone outside.
32:45Outside the door.
32:46Oh, honey.
32:49Oh!
32:50What are you doing?
32:51That was you.
32:53He's only opening the door, you know.
32:59Oh!
33:01Oh!
33:01Oh!
33:01Oh, my God!
33:02I definitely saw it!
33:04Hello?
33:06Oh, there's somebody there!
33:07That's not scary.
33:08No, somebody's staying there.
33:10He didn't tell him that.
33:11The innkeeper didn't tell me anyone else would be here.
33:15Does he usually announce guests to each other?
33:17Just another guest?
33:18I mean, that's normal if you're going to a hotel, isn't it?
33:21I'm William.
33:22Is William really there?
33:24That's what I'm thinking.
33:25Is William a ghost?
33:28You know...
33:31Something's not right here, self.
33:33No, cos why would he still be wearing his tie?
33:36Yeah, you'd have had that off and top button under, wouldn't you?
33:39Exactly.
33:39Before heading to bed, Mayor Tom wanted to check where the noises were coming from.
33:48There's the crawl space, Mary.
33:50Oh, shit, no.
33:51Oh, that is very small, isn't it?
33:57It's actually going in there.
33:58Shit.
33:59Oh, he's going in!
34:00Yuck!
34:01You silly bastard!
34:03What the hell, Abs?
34:05I need to block my ear.
34:09Bloody hell, it's like a whole other room in there.
34:15I'm really not enjoying this.
34:17All my life.
34:20What are you doing?
34:23Jenny, what is the matter with you?
34:25Well, I'm scared.
34:26And they haven't even seen, don't you?
34:30Oh, he's videoing.
34:31I am in the crawl space.
34:36Oh, what was that?
34:38Was that someone behind them?
34:40Hello?
34:41Hello?
34:42Oh, Tom, get out.
34:43See, there's nobody there.
34:46William?
34:48Who is it?
34:48Go back, go back, go back, go back!
34:53Oh!
34:56Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.
34:58Howdy, neighbour.
34:59Oh, it's William.
35:01Need some help in there?
35:02What?
35:03What?
35:03No!
35:04No!
35:04Oh, no, this is creepy now.
35:06Why can't we see his face?
35:08No, don't, don't, don't come in!
35:10Don't, I'm coming out!
35:11Don't come in!
35:12Ah!
35:13Ah!
35:13He's getting in the hole!
35:15Don't go...
35:17Ah!
35:18Oh!
35:18The fucking clown!
35:19Oh, oh, oh, my God!
35:21Oh, what is it?
35:22Oh, my God, it's a clown!
35:27Oh!
35:28Oh, fuck!
35:29There's a buddy!
35:31Oh, he's bloody dreaming!
35:37It was just a dream.
35:39Fuck off.
35:40Oh, no, I'll be having bastard dreams all night now.
35:43Like what?
35:44You mean, like Tom?
35:45Yeah, following me up my passage.
35:48Oh!
35:49Oh, you don't want that.
35:58In Blackpool, did I tell you Paige played an absolute blinder the other night?
36:03Why?
36:04So Eva was a bit poorly getting up, getting up every two minutes, waking up.
36:08Paige's turn to get up.
36:09Do you want to come and stop in Mummy and Daddy's bed then?
36:12Yeah!
36:13Pete and his little sister Sophie.
36:16Anyway, Eva starts snoring in the middle of us and me and Paige are like that and Paige
36:20are like, I can't sleep like this, I'm going in the other room.
36:24I went, you cheeky son!
36:26You're the one who's offered her to come in here and now I'm having to put up with this.
36:30Oh, God.
36:32I nearly went and stopped in Eva's cot even at our bed and Paige's in the spare room.
36:37This week, it was an action-packed thriller set Down Under that had us on the edge of our seats
36:42on Netflix.
36:43Are you ready to be thrilled, Jane?
36:45Yeah, could do with a bit of a thriller.
36:47Right, it'll perk you up a bit.
36:48Yeah, it will perk me up.
36:49Oh, that'll be lovely, I'll look forward to that.
36:50I like Charlize Theron but I only like her in select stuff like the Italian job The Remake when she
36:56was a savecracker.
36:58Oh!
36:58Now you know who she is.
36:59I know who she is now, the one with the stethoscope.
37:01That's right.
37:07Apex, that's how you shape somebody's nail when you're doing them, you want it to have an apex.
37:12Yeah, but it's an apex predator, it's the top of the food chain.
37:16Oh, is it?
37:16Yeah.
37:18My mind just goes to nails.
37:20In the film, we found Charlize Theron looking for a route through the Australian outback.
37:25You're going there alone?
37:28I wouldn't recommend it.
37:29Why?
37:30Why?
37:30I think at this point in the film if she turned round and said, oh, I'll give it a miss,
37:34it would be quite a shit ending.
37:36Yeah.
37:36People get lost in these woods all the time.
37:39And here they stay lost.
37:40Oh, look at all them people missing on the board.
37:42Oh!
37:42God!
37:43Get out.
37:43I mean, if that's not shouting red flag, what is?
37:48Hi.
37:48Hello.
37:49Hi.
37:50Heyo.
37:51Tyron Edgerton's here.
37:52Oh, that's the guy that plays Elton John, innit?
37:55Yeah.
37:56And Eddie the Eagle, innit?
37:57That's right, tight.
37:58I'm trying to get to Grand Isle Narrows.
38:00Are you?
38:00My GPS is out, yeah.
38:02Are you here for the canyon?
38:02Yeah.
38:03Don't tell, you don't tell people where you're going, love, Sasha.
38:06Yeah.
38:07Start of Blackstone Bay.
38:08Just before you get to the split break, you're going to find the most amazing camping area.
38:13Okay.
38:13It's a bit of a well-kept secret.
38:14That's where all the people go missing.
38:16Ooh, that's a bit dodgy.
38:17Ooh, camping area.
38:18Well-kept secret nobody knows about.
38:20I hope you know what you're doing, cos it can get pretty intense.
38:22Yeah, intense, innit?
38:23Pretty gnarly.
38:24It's okay.
38:24Most people do it in pairs.
38:25Ooh, if Taryn were suggesting for us to go in pairs, I'd be on it like a cab on it.
38:30It's like people are telling her and warning her against it, she's not taking any notice.
38:35Whatsoever.
38:35No.
38:40Ooh, that looks pretty.
38:42Looks pretty creepy to me.
38:43Imagine just rocking up to that by yourself, though, innit?
38:46Yeah.
38:47In Australia.
38:48Yeah, in all places.
38:49I know.
38:50You might be able to do that in Somerset.
38:51Yeah.
38:55Oh.
38:56Who's this?
38:57It's another cab.
39:02Oh, no.
39:03Oh.
39:04You know that's trouble already, innit?
39:07Do you want to be allowed?
39:08You want.
39:09I'd get in a camper van if I was you, love.
39:11Yeah.
39:11And get me head down.
39:12And put the locks down on the doors, too.
39:14I know.
39:15Would you?
39:15Yeah.
39:16Street away.
39:20Oh, they're going.
39:21They're leaving.
39:22You would never catch me wild camping on me own.
39:25Absolutely not.
39:26I wouldn't go camping on an actual campsite with facilities.
39:30Never mind wild camping.
39:32In company.
39:33With the trip not quite going to plan, Shalee's stumbled across another camper.
39:38Hello?
39:42Somebody's been here.
39:44Look, the fire's lit.
39:45Fire's still burning.
39:47Oh.
39:48Hey.
39:49Oh, who's that?
39:50Oh, it's Taran Edgerton.
39:51I'm Ben.
39:52Sasha, Ben.
39:53Nice to meet you.
39:54Hi, Sasha.
39:54What a coincidence seeing you here.
39:56I'm so sad for you to go this way.
39:58I told you to come to my camp.
40:00I'd be quite pleased if I bumped into Ben.
40:03I don't know if I would.
40:04Something got into my gear last night and took everything.
40:06My phone, my food.
40:08Oh, bloody hell.
40:09Oh, bloody hell.
40:10He didn't sound surprised, did he?
40:12Yeah.
40:12Good news is I always pack twice what I need.
40:16I'm more than happy to set you up.
40:17Is he bad or good?
40:18We can't tell yet, Mary.
40:20I know who showed up at my campsite the other night.
40:23It was Hunter.
40:24It's from the gas station.
40:26You're definitely messing with me.
40:27I'd be more wary of him.
40:29I am.
40:30I'm more wary of him.
40:32You handled them perfectly, though.
40:33What?
40:34You handled them perfectly?
40:36How does he know?
40:38What?
40:39You had greed and poise.
40:41Was he there?
40:42Sorry, what are you seeing?
40:44At the campsite?
40:45No, I was there.
40:46I thought maybe you could use a hand.
40:48Huh?
40:48This is a bit weird now.
40:50Yeah.
40:50Oh, Daniela is following her.
40:52Not the guys, though, clearly.
40:55Oh, no.
40:56That laugh, she'll...
40:58This is when it's time for me to leave, though.
41:01Like...
41:02Yeah.
41:03You're not going to finish your brickie?
41:05I'm suddenly full, actually.
41:07Play it down.
41:08Yeah.
41:08Turn round.
41:09Run like hell.
41:10Play it down, get a rock, smack him in the head.
41:16What's that?
41:17Whoa!
41:18He's got a crossbow!
41:19Ben is a psychopath.
41:21Run!
41:26Why is he playing the music?
41:28Is this some kind of sick fantasy he's got?
41:30So, look, it's very simple.
41:31You've got until the very end of this song to get as far away from you as you can.
41:34Oh, he wants to hunt her.
41:35He's gonna kill her?
41:36I'm gonna hunt her.
41:37See we get to the end, but that's where we begin.
41:39You feel it, mannequins, and we break it down.
41:40Ah!
41:41Okay, he's seriously fucked up.
41:45Good taste of music, though.
41:46Can you start it from the beginning, at least?
41:50We've already had, like, the intro bit.
41:52So you take explosive, get it out, send your body to flight.
41:55Run, Sasha, run!
41:57Go on.
41:57You wanna run like hell, then?
41:59Huh?
41:59You're literally running for your life.
42:02Go!
42:04Go, go, go!
42:05The music's stopped!
42:10Oh!
42:11He's off.
42:11He's fucked!
42:15Look at him.
42:16Well, he's right there already.
42:17He knows that for his lap back of his hand, so...
42:22Oh!
42:23Oh, shit!
42:27Oh, my God, she's lost the kayak.
42:29She's fucked it herself.
42:30She has.
42:33Oh, where's Ben to?
42:35I don't know.
42:36I wouldn't like to see, love.
42:38You'd be going, do you know what, just shoot me.
42:40Yeah.
42:41This is why I don't like to be out my comfort zone.
42:43No.
42:45Absolutely not.
42:46I like me own home.
42:48I like a cup of tea.
42:49I like a panini.
42:52Not the panini.
42:55In home...
42:57You know what, I wonder what they call French toast in France.
43:00French toast?
43:01Don't they?
43:02Or do they just say toast?
43:04Best friends Jenny and Lee.
43:06Try to eat me sandwich.
43:09Well, I'm just asking you, would France, would people in France call French toast toast?
43:14No, call it French toast.
43:16Why would they?
43:17Because they're in France.
43:18Well, we call ours mustard, English mustard, don't we?
43:22So...
43:23So would they just call it toast?
43:24And we just call it mustard.
43:26And not French toast?
43:28I've gone off it.
43:31Give it to a French person.
43:34On Friday night, a new national scandal was making the headlines on the BBC.
43:39I've had a great day-to-day work.
43:42They've moved where I sit, so I've been in front of the window where the sun's coming in.
43:47My treat.
43:48Oh, it is.
43:49He's starting to bug me again, please get him away, I'm starting to freak out.
43:52Stop pestering Giles.
43:55Leave him alone.
43:56And stop staring at him.
43:59It's like a death stare.
44:00Now, this is a bit of a fishy tale, because the BBC has learned that some chip shops are passing
44:05off catfish as traditional fish and chips.
44:08Oh!
44:08No way!
44:10They're cheeky bastards!
44:11Catfish, what's that?
44:13I thought that was when you post a photo and you look nothing like you do in real life.
44:17It's significantly cheaper than the usual cod or haddock, but can be hard to detect.
44:21We're being catfished by catfish.
44:23Huh?
44:24I know.
44:25Oh, my God.
44:26It's all a lie.
44:27Look at these immigrant fish coming in and taking our other fish's jobs.
44:31They should be ashamed of themselves.
44:33Well, now, DNA tests have been carried out on the fish from ten chip shops in the north-west of
44:39England.
44:39North-west?
44:40Oh, my God.
44:41I'm disgusted.
44:43We're renowned for all fish and chips round here.
44:45We can't be having this.
44:47This is almost like when you get caught naked somewhere.
44:50Yeah.
44:50I'm embarrassed.
44:52It's one of the nation's favourite takeaways.
44:54But how much do we know about what we're eating?
44:57It's expensive and all now, ain't it?
44:59How much it is?
45:00Nine quid for a fish.
45:01Ah, but what you eating?
45:03Is it catfish?
45:04Yeah, I'd want the full tank for nine quid.
45:06When you go in your local chippy, you ask for fish and chips, what do you expect to get back?
45:11Fish.
45:12Probably cod or hadn't.
45:14Cods.
45:15That's the only one I'd expect.
45:16You know, cod.
45:17The fish isn't fish, the sausage isn't sausage, and I don't know what's in the steak and kidney pudding, but
45:23I'll eat them all.
45:24We analysed reviews of chippies and found dozens of complaints where the species of the fish was questioned.
45:30Who's doing that? What kind of review is that?
45:33I've never read a review where the word species is in it.
45:37Yeah.
45:38We bought ten portions from takeaways and sent them for DNA testing.
45:42I don't think we need to know who the dad is to the fish.
45:45We're not looking for its mum and dad. It's not finding any more.
45:49Imagine if our fish and chip shops are letting us down, imagine what all the other takeaways are doing, Danielle.
45:53Exactly.
45:53The test showed that seven of the samples were cod and haddock, as advertised, but the remaining three, which were
46:00sold to us as traditional fish,
46:01where, in fact, a tropical freshwater catfish known as river cobbler.
46:06Hey, they need a dun-dun-dun!
46:09I love the fact that this is happening, isn't it?
46:11But the sneaky-looking donna kebab in the corner is spinning round going,
46:16don't ask any questions about me.
46:18You don't want to know the answers here.
46:25Liverpool squeezed through and Brighton were a little unexpected.
46:29Jill Scott and Maisie Adam bring us the Women's FA Cup semi-final this Sunday at 12.
46:35And Colleen Nolan is being equipped with some naughty toys.
46:39Spare your blushes.
46:40Celebs go dating Monday night at 9.25 on E4 or stream the series so far.
46:45The perfect world.
46:47The perfect world.
46:48The perfect world.
46:48The perfect world.
46:49The perfect world.
46:50The perfect world.
46:51The perfect world.
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