- 10 hours ago
Desperate Housewives Season 2 Episode 5
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:02Previously on Desperate Housewives...
00:04The police dug up your father today.
00:06They think that somebody was poisoning him.
00:08Apparently, I'm a suspect.
00:09Brie felt threatened by the past.
00:11Get the damn lawyer.
00:12Are you hitting on me?
00:13Gabrielle was threatened by seduction.
00:16Do you mean Julie?
00:16If I come back with you, then I can make it up to her.
00:18I think you should try to find your father first.
00:21Let me help.
00:21And while some threats...
00:27were kept under control...
00:30Let's get this over with.
00:31Some were left free...
00:33to return.
00:38Since her first day on the job,
00:40it had been clear to Lynette Scavo...
00:43that her new boss, Nina, was unusually...
00:46tense.
00:48To help relieve her tension,
00:50Lynette tried giving her boss thoughtful gifts.
00:53A soothing wave machine...
00:58aromatherapy candles...
01:00aromatherapy candles...
01:03even meditative chi balls.
01:07But nothing seemed to ease Nina's tension.
01:11Distilled the old-fashioned way.
01:14You know, it actually hurts my teeth...
01:17to say that out loud.
01:18You folks are going to toddle back to your little holes...
01:22and you are going to come up with a decent slogan...
01:24or I will can all your asses...
01:26the old-fashioned way.
01:31Until one day...
01:33when it occurred to Lynette...
01:35there was one form of relaxation...
01:37she had yet to try.
01:40It's a gimlet.
01:42You'll love it.
01:43What exactly is your plan here...
01:45to get me all liquored up...
01:46so I buy the revised pitch?
01:48Don't be ridiculous.
01:50Could we get a trough of these, please?
01:54I can't remember the last time I was in a bar.
01:57Must have been the last time I had a boyfriend...
01:59which was...
02:01Oh God, I'm a nun.
02:03So why don't you go out and get in the game?
02:05Believe it or not...
02:07when it comes to meeting men...
02:09I am...
02:11shy.
02:13Well, I'm not.
02:15So, uh...
02:17what about that guy over there?
02:19He's been checking you out since we walked in.
02:23That's cute.
02:24So go over there.
02:27No.
02:28Oh, for God's sake.
02:30Where are you going?
02:31Lynette, sit.
02:36Hey, Stretch.
02:38See my friend over there?
02:40She thinks you're cute.
02:44Why don't you buy her a drink?
02:51Hey, everybody.
02:52Hi.
02:53Oh, it's a beautiful morning, isn't it?
02:56Thank you, sweetie.
02:57Oh, hey, Lynette.
02:58I read the new Vanka proposal.
03:00You guys hit it out of the park.
03:03Wow.
03:04I love that color.
03:05Thanks.
03:07Hey, Nina.
03:08Yeah.
03:09And although it had come about in an unexpected manner...
03:13Aren't those the same clothes you were wearing last night in the bar?
03:16Yep.
03:17Nina's tension had finally been released.
03:21The old-fashioned way.
03:32The Friendship fiber.
03:33I'm not ailiar way.
03:38I love that color.
04:11Transcription by CastingWords
04:12Be it a faithful companion, trusted confidant, or loyal friend.
04:21For Susan Meyer, that dependable someone was her book agent, Lonnie Moon.
04:29It was Lonnie who helped Susan promote her first children's book.
04:34It was Lonnie who rushed Susan to the hospital the night Julie was born.
04:39It was Lonnie who took Susan's mind off her painful divorce with a fun vacation.
04:47Yes, Lonnie was Susan's rock.
04:51Sadly for Susan, her rock was about to crumble.
04:55For those of you just joining us, we have a new development in the Melanie Foster case.
05:01Lonnie, what are you doing here?
05:03It's past noon, which means it's now socially acceptable to begin drinking.
05:08I can't believe I let you talk me into this.
05:10I am so behind in my work, but I'm glad I came.
05:13This is fun.
05:14I've got to be honest.
05:16I had an ulterior motive.
05:18Oh?
05:19I've decided to start my own agency.
05:22You're leaving Muren Hunt?
05:24You helped build that place.
05:26I know, but I just feel it's time.
05:29And now the question is, will you come with me?
05:33Well, of course.
05:40I'll just call the agency and I'll let them know I'm going with you.
05:44Oh, I don't think that's necessary.
05:46Really?
05:48Yeah, I think it might be rude not to.
05:54Lonnie, what's going on?
05:56Okay.
05:59There's been some bad blood between me and the partners.
06:02Why?
06:03I got into this thing where I had to move a little client money around temporarily to cover some expenses.
06:09You had to move money?
06:11What does that mean?
06:12I took a little from here and I moved it there.
06:16It was no big deal.
06:18Really?
06:20Because it sort of sounds like embezzlement.
06:22Why do people keep using that word?
06:24Who else is using that word?
06:26Nobody.
06:28The partners and their forensic accountant.
06:31Oh, my God.
06:33Lonnie, did you move some of my money?
06:36Absolutely not.
06:37I swear.
06:39Susan, don't look at me that way.
06:41I know what I did was wrong.
06:43And I feel like a complete idiot for doing it.
06:46But please, please don't hate me.
06:50Well, I don't hate you.
06:51I couldn't hate you.
06:52You're my Lonnie.
06:57So, will you still come with me?
07:04You know what?
07:07This is one of those times when you find out who your real friends are.
07:10So, yeah.
07:12Oh, thank you.
07:15You are one special lady, Susan Meyer.
07:22Is that the baby's head?
07:23No, that's his foot.
07:28That looks like a head to me.
07:30Well, that settles it.
07:31When this baby's born, I'll be in charge of putting on the socks.
07:36You're glowing today, you know that?
07:39Pregnancy agrees with you.
07:40Yeah?
07:40Well, if you don't mind the hemorrhoids and the nausea, it's quite the party.
07:45I don't know where David is.
07:47He should have been here by now.
07:49So, this new lawyer's good?
07:50He's quite the shark.
07:51You're going to love him.
07:52He hasn't lost a case in six years.
07:54He argued in front of the state Supreme Court.
07:57And he made our conjugal visit happen pretty damn fast.
08:00Oh, hey, I'm a fan already.
08:02Sorry I'm late.
08:03Oh, David.
08:05Good to see you, Gabby.
08:07Carlos, I'm David.
08:25I don't think so.
08:27What the hell are you doing?
08:30That guy's not going to be my lawyer.
08:32Find a new one.
08:36You haven't filed a single charge.
08:38Either determine a homicide or release the body.
08:41We've got a court order which says until we're done with it,
08:43that the corpse is ours.
08:44He is not a corpse.
08:46He is a man named Rex Vandekamp.
08:48He was a loving husband, a devoted father, and a successful doctor.
08:53So successful, in fact, that he left me enough money to sue the city,
08:57this precinct, and you two gentlemen personally, just for the fun of it.
09:01Mrs. Vandekamp, we don't respond well to threats.
09:04So if I were you...
09:05Release the body.
09:07What?
09:08The evidence we have is minimal at best.
09:10Mrs. Vandekamp was gracious enough to come down here and take that lie detector test.
09:14I think it's the least we can do for her.
09:19So, uh, what will happen now?
09:22Obviously, we'll put Mr. Vandekamp back just like we found him.
09:25Yes, and I'm sure you will bury him with all the dignity of a dead hamster.
09:30You know, I want Rex released to me, and I will make all the arrangements.
09:35Fine.
09:35And, of course, you'll be paying all the costs.
09:38Of course.
09:42Detective Barton, you are clearly a gentleman.
09:53People have gathered at Attenborough High School when Melanie attended...
09:56No, it's fine.
09:57I'll pick him up on my way home.
09:59Okay, so, what do you want?
10:01Oh, Parker hates pepperoni.
10:03Um, how about sausage?
10:05Yeah.
10:05And a small cheese.
10:07Okay, perfect.
10:08Love ya.
10:10Hey, you.
10:11Hey.
10:12You want to hit O'Donnell's?
10:13I owe you a beer.
10:15Actually, I owe you so much more than that.
10:18You're welcome, but I really need to get home.
10:20Oh, come on.
10:21I had such a good time last night.
10:23Um, why don't you ask Trudy?
10:25She loves going out.
10:26Trudy?
10:27Are you kidding?
10:28I don't need the competition.
10:29Have you seen Trudy without her jacket?
10:30She's hot.
10:32Who is she now?
10:33I didn't mean that you're not hot.
10:36I just, you're married.
10:38Ah.
10:39You know, you're off the market.
10:40I don't have to worry about fighting you for guys.
10:43Come on, Lynette.
10:44Just one quick little drink.
10:46I was actually starting to think that you and I were becoming pals.
10:51Pals?
10:52Because sometimes it's hard to tell.
10:54You know, I wasn't feeling the love today when you mocked my campaign in front of the clients.
10:59That was just putting on a show for work.
11:03In the future, always assume that I am winking.
11:07Inside.
11:09Come on.
11:10I hate to go to a bar alone.
11:11I feel like such a loser.
11:15Okay.
11:16One drink.
11:17Yeah.
11:18One or two.
11:19No.
11:43Thank you so much for bringing my mail over.
11:46You know, I, I have some of yours in the kitchen.
11:49Well, that's the fourth time.
11:51What's up with this postman?
11:52Oh, I know.
11:53He used to be great.
11:55Then he had this stroke and now we're lucky if he doesn't drool on the coupons.
12:01But feel free to snoop around.
12:02I'll be right back.
12:19Now, for those of you just joining us, families in Chicago breathe a sigh of relief today as
12:24an arrest was finally made in the brutal attack on local high school student, Melanie Foster.
12:30But word of the suspect's capture comes in small comfort to the Foster family.
12:34Betty?
12:34She lost her 17-year-old daughter almost four months ago.
12:38They've been body with a neighborhood in a local park less than a mile from Hattonboro High.
12:49Did you see the news?
12:50They've arrested somebody.
12:52Yeah.
12:53Looks like we're in the clear.
13:02Well, I have some good news.
13:04The police have finally released Rex's body.
13:06About time.
13:07You must be so relieved.
13:09You know, mostly I'm just annoyed that the whole thing happened in the first place.
13:12I mean, how in the world could anybody accuse me of murder?
13:16Well, you are wound pretty tight.
13:21What?
13:22The super mom is always the first to snap.
13:24They've done studies.
13:27Anyway, I was hoping that you were all free Friday morning because that's when I'm going
13:30to be hosting the reburial.
13:34The what?
13:35Look, I know it's an imposition, but Danielle is away on a class trip and
13:39Andrew is back at Camp Hennessy for a little refresher course.
13:42Well, it's just going to be a very brief and dignified ceremony, and I was hoping that
13:48you could say a few words, and I'm going to read a poem.
13:53We would love to come.
13:55We would love to come.
13:55Absolutely.
14:00I'm busy.
14:01Sorry.
14:02Katie.
14:03She's going to read a poem.
14:06Ow!
14:07Fine.
14:08Yes.
14:08Yes.
14:09We'd all love to come.
14:13Well, thank you.
14:15You don't know how much this means to me.
14:19I realized looking back that I was still in shock during Rex's first funeral.
14:24I don't think it had quite hit me at what had happened, so that's why this small ceremony
14:29means so much to me, because I realize now that this is the last chance I'm going to have
14:37to say goodbye.
14:43Unless, of course, they dig him up again.
14:51Sure, there was times when Lisa was rude and obnoxious, but I know now that there was
14:57no excuse to always be beating on her.
15:01Baby, I'm just so sorry.
15:08Good job, you two.
15:10This is an example of how to use incarceration to your benefit.
15:13It's a chance for people to take a step back and observe the obstacles they face in their
15:19marriage.
15:19Can I go now?
15:21Because I have a lot to say about the obstacles I'm facing in my marriage.
15:24We don't got any obstacles.
15:26Yes, we do, Lamar.
15:27We got big ones.
15:28Okay, hold on, you two.
15:29I think that it's Carlos and Gabrielle's turn.
15:33Thanks, but we're good.
15:38This is your third group session, but you have yet to share anything.
15:42Come on, talk to us.
15:45How's your marriage?
15:47Shaky at best.
15:48And why is that?
15:50I don't know.
15:51I hired a brilliant lawyer to get my husband out of this hellhole, and he fired him for no
15:55reason at all.
15:57Carlos?
15:59I just didn't like him.
16:00Why not?
16:01He's experienced, he's intelligent, he's successful.
16:03Exactly.
16:04I'd prefer an attorney you didn't find so damn appealing.
16:06Oh my God.
16:07You fired him because you're jealous?
16:09Don't I have the right to?
16:10You know she cheated on me.
16:12Oh, Bob, you beat your wife.
16:14You are so not allowed to gasp.
16:15Don't you talk that way to him.
16:16One reward out of you, Lisa, and I will backhand you myself.
16:19Okay.
16:19Calm down.
16:20Thousands of fatball attorneys out there in the world, and she's got to get the one
16:23that looks like an underwear model.
16:24I'm not discussing this anymore.
16:26You can rot in here for all I care.
16:32So, um, Mona, what do you feel are the biggest problems in your marriage?
16:37By the way, he was wearing a suit.
16:39How do you know he had a good body?
16:40Do you know?
16:41No.
16:42I bet he's hot.
16:47Do I need to say what our biggest problem is, or can everybody figure it out for themselves?
16:57Why are you reading that contract?
16:59I told you.
17:00Lonnie wants me to sign with this new agency.
17:03But you didn't say you were seriously thinking about going with him.
17:06I know.
17:07I know.
17:09It's just Lonnie's family.
17:11You know, he's always been there for me.
17:13He paid my rent when I was waiting for my first royalty check.
17:17He called me every day when Carl left.
17:19I mean, I just owe him so much.
17:21Susan, he committed a felony.
17:23Okay, who in this room has not committed a felony?
17:25Raise your hand.
17:26Uh-uh-uh, not so fast.
17:28Your agent represents you.
17:30You've got to be able to trust him.
17:31How's that going to be possible now?
17:34Well, it's possible because I have faith in people.
17:38I mean, Lonnie knows he messed up, and he's sorry he's making restitution.
17:42What, you don't believe people deserve second chances?
17:45Not when they messed up this much, no.
17:48Really?
17:50So that's it with you?
17:51You just get one shot, and you screw up, and you're out?
17:54I didn't know you were such a cynic.
17:56I'm sorry.
17:57All right, I guess it's just the way I'm wired.
18:01But I got a job over in Greenwood, so I'll call you later tonight.
18:13You okay?
18:17Julie.
18:20I did something bad.
18:22Something really, really bad.
18:28Aren't you going to ask me what it was?
18:30Do I ever have to?
18:32Last week, when Mike and I went to the park searching for Zach, I sort of found him.
18:40No.
18:41Yes.
18:41And I gave him money, and I sent him away.
18:44And I didn't tell Mike.
18:46Holy crap, what are you going to do?
18:47I don't know.
18:49What would you do if this happened to you?
18:52See, this would never happen to me.
18:54This kind of thing only happens to you.
18:55Will you stop judging and help me?
18:58Well, obviously you're going to have to tell him.
19:00Well, I can't do that.
19:01You heard what he said about his wiring.
19:03I betrayed him.
19:04He'll never forgive me.
19:05Okay.
19:06Don't tell him.
19:06Well, how could I not?
19:07I feel so guilty.
19:08I can barely look him in the eye when he talks about Zach.
19:11So, where do you think Zach went?
19:16Utah.
19:19Oh, Lord.
19:21Why did I do this?
19:23I have a feeling you did it for me.
19:46Hey, girl.
19:46I hope you are in the mood for margaritas, because it is tonight at O'Donnell's.
19:53Oh, fun.
19:53But I can't go tonight, because I promised the twins that I would help them finish their
19:57science project.
19:59Lynette, if the late hours are going to be an issue for you, we probably should talk about
20:06finding you a less demanding account.
20:10You're going to take me off camera off because I won't go drinking with you?
20:13No.
20:14Oh, God, no, honey.
20:16I get it.
20:16You have a family.
20:18Home has to come first for you.
20:21I mean, for me, the client comes first.
20:23Being a perfectionist is my own neurotic issue, and I know that I really need to work on that.
20:27But trust me, I will never sleep again if this campaign gets mucked up.
20:33I'll figure something out.
20:35You go home.
20:35Have a good night.
20:38Nina?
20:40Yeah?
20:42I can handle the extra hours.
20:45Oh, Lynette, you sure?
20:47Yeah.
20:48I'll get my coat.
20:53Wow, this place is rowdy after happy hour, huh?
20:57Yeah.
20:59Hey, look at that guy right there at the end of the bar, the shoulders with the tan jacket.
21:05Yeah?
21:06Go get him for me.
21:11Go get him for me.
21:40Hey there.
21:51So, they're going on about Melanie Foster on the news.
21:58It's time we talked about her, Caleb.
22:03Until you start accepting responsibility for what happened, you know I can't let you out of here.
22:18What the hell is this?
22:20Mom!
22:22Where are you?
22:24I'll be right back.
22:27And I will expect you to answer me.
22:30Where are you?
22:31I'm coming!
22:33I'm coming!
22:40What were you going to do with this?
22:42Don't.
22:43I know who really killed Melanie Foster.
22:46You've arrested the wrong man.
22:47What are you thinking?
22:48The police need to know the truth.
22:50The hell they do!
22:51This is our chance!
22:52We are people.
22:54Don't let an innocent man go to jail.
22:56You want to do the right thing?
22:58Well, then call 911 and tell him you got a killer locked up in the basement.
23:00He is not a killer.
23:02He was confused.
23:04He didn't know what he was doing.
23:06He knows a lot more than you give him credit for.
23:09I'm mailing the letter.
23:11Do you realize what's going to happen?
23:13Mom, are you thinking this through?
23:16I'm mailing the letter.
23:19If you do, you better hope to God they don't find us.
23:25Because they're not going to care how slow Caleb is.
23:28He'll just execute him.
23:57Lonnie, are you here?
24:00It's Susan.
24:02Lonnie?
24:04Susan, what are you doing here?
24:06Well, I just came over to give you the contracts.
24:09Your door was open.
24:11Oh, great.
24:14Sorry, this place is such a mess.
24:17I've been working here until we get the new offices painted.
24:20Wait until you see them.
24:22They're going to be really beautiful.
24:26Where's Jeannie?
24:28She's with the kids up in Minnesota visiting her mom.
24:31They love it up there.
24:34Keep changing the date on dear old dad.
24:42There's no electricity.
24:44There isn't?
24:46I'm such a dummy.
24:47Lonnie, I've been so swamped I must have forgotten to pay the electric bill.
24:57Lonnie, how much financial trouble are you really in?
25:02I'm fine.
25:06You know what it is?
25:07I had to pay all those people back at the same time.
25:10Restitution plus interest.
25:11It's not something I'd recommend.
25:13It sucks you dry.
25:16I'm going to ask you a question, and I want you to tell me the truth.
25:20Did you steal from me?
25:22Absolutely not.
25:24Please don't lie.
25:26Just tell me.
25:28Is that what you want to hear?
25:30Do I have to say it so that we can move on?
25:36Fine.
25:37I did it.
25:38But yours was the first money I paid back, so the slate's been wiped clean.
25:43Let's just move past it.
25:45Suze.
25:48I'm sorry.
25:49I just can't trust you anymore.
25:51Yes, you can.
25:52No, I can't.
25:53You can.
25:54Can't.
25:55Give me the contract.
25:56No.
25:59Okay, okay, fine.
26:03Mom, what are you doing?
26:05Are you trying to take me down with you?
26:07I am not going down.
26:10Ow.
26:11My life is great.
26:13I have never been happier, and I've never been fitter.
26:18Get off me, you Amazon.
26:22Oh.
26:33What are you doing here?
26:35You left me a message.
26:36You said you wanted to talk.
26:38Yeah, I thought you'd schedule an appointment later.
26:41Right now, I'm sort of disgusting and sweaty.
26:44I'm a criminal lawyer.
26:46I've seen worse.
26:56I'm a criminal lawyer.
26:57So, did you find a new lawyer for Mr. Charming?
27:00I don't want a new lawyer.
27:01I want you.
27:02So does Carlos.
27:03He just doesn't realize it yet.
27:05So, 1988, Romany, Conti, La Tosh.
27:08I'm impressed.
27:09Look, to be honest, Carlos is a little threatened by you.
27:12He thinks if we spend too much time together that something might happen.
27:18Somebody's got an active imagination.
27:21Cork's true.
27:22David, we're not here to drink wine, okay?
27:25This is business.
27:26Now, you have to convince Carlos that he can trust you.
27:30How am I going to do that?
27:33I don't know.
27:34Tell him you're happily married or gay.
27:38Yeah, right.
27:40You're a lawyer.
27:41You lie to juries all the time.
27:42Can't you just make something up?
27:43I passed the point in my career where I have to beg for work.
27:45I'm sorry.
27:46Okay, David.
27:48I'm holding my marriage together by my fingernails.
27:50If Carlos serves this full sentence, I don't think we're going to make it.
27:53So, please, I need you.
27:56I'll say this much for Carlos.
27:57He's got excellent taste.
28:01In wine.
28:03Montraché.
28:04It's good stuff.
28:06Are you going to help me or not?
28:08We'll go see Carlos tomorrow.
28:10I'll turn him around for you.
28:11Really?
28:12What are you going to say?
28:13Play it by ear.
28:15I don't want to sound too over-hearsed.
28:18Hey, that's my wine.
28:21Get deducted from my bill.
28:26It all started with bad real estate investments.
28:31You should have just come clean.
28:33Yeah, well, you tell one lie.
28:35The second one comes easy.
28:37Then you're making up new lies to cover up the old ones.
28:40Pretty soon you can't turn back, you know?
28:44I do.
28:46When Jeannie finally caught on, she took the kids, she took the furniture, the bank, locked
28:54me out of my own house.
28:57Wow.
29:00That's why I can't lose you as a client.
29:03Well, I'm sorry, but you have.
29:07I don't blame you.
29:09You'll never lose my friendship, though.
29:12I mean that.
29:13Really?
29:14Of course.
29:15You're my Lonnie.
29:19You're my Susie.
29:22You're my Susie.
29:28Oh!
29:29What the hell is wrong with you?
29:31I'm your Lonnie.
29:32That's what you said.
29:33Not like that.
29:34But I thought, I mean, there's always been this magnetism.
29:37No, there has not been, and there never will be.
29:41Oh, my God!
29:42But I was just coming clean!
29:49Hey, Morgan!
29:52Got a letter from some guy claiming he attacked Melanie Foster.
29:56You ran me down for that?
29:58I got dozens of coops coming out of the woodwork, all saying we arrested the wrong guy.
30:02This one knows about the axe.
30:23Here you go, Mrs. Vandekamp.
30:26Uh, the hearse is right outside, so if you'll just follow me.
30:29Oh, shoot.
30:30There's a form I need you to sign.
30:31I think I left it back in the office.
30:33That's all right.
30:34I'll wait.
30:34Okay.
30:43I'm here, sweetheart.
30:45And I'm going to take care of everything.
30:49But you knew that, didn't you?
30:50You've always known that you can count on me.
30:54Mrs. Vandekamp.
30:56Detective Barton, what are you doing here?
30:58Oh, I'm just taking care of some business.
31:01Is this?
31:03Yes.
31:04This is Rex.
31:06I want to thank you again for what you did.
31:10It was so refreshing to be treated with kindness after weeks of just ludicrous accusations.
31:17The doctor doesn't think they're ludicrous.
31:19Well, I know, but Rex died in his care.
31:21I mean, of course he'd like to blame someone else.
31:23But the tests he did, uh...
31:25Oh, please don't talk to me about tests.
31:27Rex was not poisoned, and no one I know believes that he was.
31:32Rex did.
31:34What?
31:35Well, the doctor told Rex he was being poisoned, and Rex believed him.
31:39How would you know that?
31:41Oh!
31:52Where did you get this?
31:53We found that in Rex's bed after he died.
31:55That is his handwriting, isn't it?
32:06You know what I think?
32:09Rex.
32:11He felt guilty for the way he treated you.
32:14The adultery, the public humiliations.
32:18That's why he forgave you.
32:19He understood why you did it.
32:23How could he have believed this?
32:26But my wife cheated on me, too.
32:28I know how much it hurts.
32:32And so will a judge.
32:34Everyone understands crimes of passion.
32:37But every day that you stonewall makes you look more and more like a cold, calculating killer.
32:46We both know that's not you.
32:49But I can't help you unless you start telling the truth.
33:03I'm sorry, but I, I, um, I have to go.
33:07I have some things that I need to take care of.
33:16Brie, it is obvious your husband loved you very much.
33:19Don't you think you owe to him to admit the truth?
33:21Detective, I know exactly what my husband deserves.
33:23Now, would you be a dear?
33:48What's he doing here?
33:51I have a pitch for you.
33:54I want to explain to you why I think it's in your best interest for you to allow me to
33:57represent you.
33:59Oh, for Pete's sake, Carlos.
34:01At least listen to the man.
34:04I guess it beats sitting in my cell.
34:09Now, I don't think you have a problem with me as a lawyer.
34:12Clearly, I'm the real deal.
34:13I sense your problem with me is more personal.
34:16You sense right?
34:17You want to know if I'm interested in sleeping with your wife?
34:22Well, the answer is yes.
34:31Carlos, he's kidding.
34:35Tell him you're kidding.
34:37Shut it.
34:39Now, clearly, Gabrielle is willful, self-centered, and manipulative.
34:43She's also beautiful enough to be worth the trouble.
34:47So, the minute we leave this room, I'm going to aggressively pursue her.
34:50And when I succeed, which I will, we're going to fly to my chateau in Chamonix and have dinner in
34:53our local bistro.
34:54They make the best raclette in all of Europe.
34:56I'll make love by the fire and afterwards do a little midnight skiing.
35:00You ski, don't you?
35:04You're athletic.
35:05You'll learn.
35:07Anyway, all of this only happens if you fire me.
35:09If you keep me on as your lawyer, your wife's off limits.
35:12I'd get this barred for sleeping with the client's wife, and nobody's worth that, not even her.
35:18So, that's my pitch.
35:20I'll let you think about it.
35:27Honey, I am so sorry.
35:30Obviously, that guy's insane.
35:32Well, you just can't wait, can you?
35:35What?
35:37He's my lawyer.
35:39Well, Carlos...
35:40And that's all there is to it.
35:52How about a dance?
35:53How about it?
35:54Yes.
35:55Well, you guys have fun.
35:57This is the fifth night in a row I haven't been home to tuck in my kids, so...
36:02I'm going to go.
36:03No, you're going to stay put.
36:04It is Friday night, and you have all weekend to play with your kids.
36:08Watch my purse.
36:25Hey, I'm Chuck.
36:27Chuck, I'm going to stop you right there.
36:30Happily married.
36:31Well, looks like we have got something in common.
36:38Ah.
36:43Chuck, get your hand off my thigh.
36:47No, not up my thigh.
36:49Off it.
36:51Come on, what's the matter with you?
36:53I'm not available, and I'm not that easy.
36:55Well, what are you doing in a pickup bar at 10.30 at night?
36:57Well, I don't usually do this.
37:00Oh, come on, honey.
37:01Who are you kidding?
37:02I've seen you here every night this week.
37:03You're a regular.
37:05At that moment, it occurred to Lynette that Chuck, though inebriated, had a valid point.
37:12The time had come to declare a war of independence.
37:15And the surest path to victory would require an aggressive campaign of shock and awe.
37:26You're a regular.
37:27Look out to me like it.
37:30It's not very bad.
37:35I can't wait if I see you again.
37:40Hey, yeah.
37:43I want to run on my, my, my, my, my conditions.
37:48Go in here.
37:51I want to run on my, my, my, my, my conditions.
37:55Yeah!
38:31It's crazy here tonight.
38:33Don't you want to dance?
38:35No thanks.
38:36I think I'll sit this one out.
38:39Lynette savored her victory, confident that she would never again have to engage her opponent
38:44on this particular battlefield.
38:47I love this song.
38:49Here, hold my purse.
39:05Brie, where have you been?
39:07We were starting to get worried.
39:08I'm sorry.
39:08I was just attending to some last minute details.
39:11Right this way.
39:12Where are we going?
39:14To Rex's grave site.
39:15Well, I thought this was his grave site.
39:17I'm changing it.
39:18Why?
39:18Well, he did something to upset me and I want him gone.
39:21What did he do?
39:22You know, it's so unpleasant.
39:23I'd rather not get into it.
39:24Have you seen these gravestones?
39:26Some are from the 1800s.
39:28Just fascinating.
39:29Wait, wait.
39:30You're going to have to explain.
39:31Rex is dead.
39:32What could he have done to upset you?
39:38My husband, the man I spent my life with for 18 years, died thinking that I murdered him.
39:44What?
39:44Yes, the cardiologist shared this moronic theory with Rex and Rex believed him.
39:50Are you sure?
39:51Yes, because he left a note.
39:52And it said, and I quote, Brie, I understand and I forgive you.
40:00I spent 18 years of my life with this man.
40:04How could he not know me?
40:07Well, maybe he was forgiving you for something else.
40:13I have done nothing to be forgiven for.
40:17I was a fantastic wife.
40:20When he was sick, I nursed him.
40:22When we were low on money, I stayed within a budget.
40:24I cooked his meals.
40:25I mended his clothes.
40:26For the love of God, I used to check his back for acne.
40:30I'm that miserable son of a bitch.
40:34Has the nerve to understand and forgive me?
40:36Well, it jokes on him because I do not understand and I do not forgive.
40:46Hi.
40:47We're just going to a funeral.
40:51Wait.
40:52This way.
40:55I know.
41:05Honey, I know you're hurt, but are you sure you're not going to change your mind?
41:08I mean, there's no turning back after this.
41:10If you think I'm going to lay next to someone for eternity who thinks I'm a murderer, you're crazy.
41:15As far as I'm concerned, let him decompose with strangers.
41:35Everyone in the world needs someone they can depend on.
41:40Be they faithful friends, determined advocates, or a loving family.
41:55But occasionally in life, the people we thought would always be there for us leave.
42:05And if that happens, it's amazing the lengths we'll go to, to get them back.
42:22Book, you can see them before you.
42:23Watch all of the world, keep them calm down.
42:29You can see them here.
42:29We'll be there for a genteel.
42:29Probably don't forget that.
42:30All right.
42:30We will be there for you.
42:30No, I'm tired of getting them at home.
42:35All right.
42:43Well, I can see you next time.
42:44The next episode is a delightful episode.
42:44We can see you next time.
42:44The next episode is to have a great episode.
42:55Transcription by CastingWords
Comments