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مسلسل Frasier 1993 مترجم - Episode 4
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00:19Dad, he's doing it again. Must this dog stare at me all the time?
00:23I don't know. Eddie, must you?
00:27Apparently he must.
00:30What is so fascinating about me? What is it?
00:33In your eyes, is my head a large piece of kibble?
00:38Am I some sort of canine enigma?
00:43Think about it. Get back to me.
00:46Here we go, gents. Dinner's up.
00:48Can I give you a hand clearing off your papers?
00:50No, you better let me. I need this in a particular order.
00:53What is all this, anyway?
00:54Oh, it's an old case of mine from the police force.
00:57The Weeping Lotus murder.
00:58Dad, I can't believe you're still trotting this old thing out.
01:01He's been trying to solve this case for 20 years.
01:03Yeah, and I'm not stopping until I do solve it.
01:06You develop certain instincts when you're a cop.
01:08And my instinct tells me that this case can be cracked.
01:11There just must be one small thing I keep overlooking.
01:14There is.
01:14Who the murderer was.
01:19It's nice you're still so dedicated to it.
01:21That's a hobby.
01:23Some guys build a boat in the garage.
01:25I try to figure out why a maniac could kill a hooker
01:28and try to stuff her entire body into a bowling bag.
01:30It's relaxing.
01:34Hello, Niles.
01:34Sorry I'm late, Fraser.
01:36Just as we were leaving, Maris had a run-in
01:38with a rude directory assistance operator
01:39and it shattered her calm.
01:41Niles, have you ever considered that maybe
01:44Maris is a bit high-strung?
01:45Maybe she should see someone?
01:47She's seen everyone.
01:47Well, why do you think she was calling directory assistance?
01:51Evening, Dr. Crane.
01:53Hello, Daphne.
01:54So good to see you again.
01:55What an enchanting scent you're wearing.
01:58Must be the ranch dressing.
02:01Won't Mrs. Crane be coming?
02:03No, I'm afraid not.
02:04And please, no more of this
02:05Dr. and Mrs. Crane formality.
02:07To you, it's Niles and...
02:11Maris.
02:11Yes, Maris.
02:15Glad you could join us, Niles.
02:16Oh, I wouldn't have missed it.
02:19Well, I guess the food's all ready.
02:21Why don't we just go ahead and start?
02:22Well, enjoy.
02:23Where are you going?
02:25I thought I'd have mine in the kitchen.
02:27Don't be ridiculous.
02:28Yes, we can't have you eating by yourself in the kitchen.
02:30I'll join you.
02:33We're all eating right here, like a family.
02:35End of discussion.
02:37Well, isn't this nice?
02:39Feels just like home.
02:41I'm famished.
02:42Me too.
02:44You boys still say a prayer before you eat?
02:45Oh, oh, almost without a exception.
02:47Yes.
02:51We thank you, Lord, for the food we're about to eat.
02:55You have blessed our table with your belly.
02:58And thank you, Lord, for bringing this family together.
03:02And we also thank you for the other gifts you've bestowed on us.
03:05And may we always remember to share with those less fortunate.
03:09Oh, will you stop staring?
03:10I wasn't staring.
03:19Amen.
03:25So, Fraser, did you happen to read Derek Mann's column today?
03:28You were mentioned.
03:30No, I missed it.
03:30Well, just as well.
03:31It wasn't flattering.
03:32Well, still, I'd like to have seen it anyway.
03:34Oh, well, why didn't you say so?
03:38If I may ask, who's Derek Mann?
03:40He writes that Mann About Town column for the Times.
03:43Boy, the things that guy comes out with.
03:45Sometimes he's really funny.
03:46What'd he say about you?
03:48I hate Fraser Crane.
03:52Oh, I'm sorry.
03:55That's it?
03:56I hate Fraser Crane?
03:57That's it?
03:57Ah, don't let it bother you.
03:59Well, actually, it doesn't, Dad.
04:00I knew when I chose a career in the public eye that I'd be open to certain criticism.
04:04It's the price I pay for my celebrity.
04:06But thank you, Niles, for bringing me the paper.
04:09And thank you for highlighting it in yellow.
04:16Now, who would like some wine?
04:17Oh, I'll have some.
04:18Daphne, the salad is exquisite.
04:20Now, why would he say that?
04:22It must be the carrots.
04:23He always did like them.
04:25Not the salad.
04:26Derek Mann.
04:27I mean, why would he write a thing like that?
04:30I've never done anything to him.
04:31I mean, this attack is totally unwarranted.
04:33I'm a healer, for God's sake.
04:35Oh, for crying out loud.
04:36Oh, well, Dad, I have every right to be upset about this.
04:39I will not enjoy my dinner until this is where it belongs, in the trash.
04:42Oh, oh, oh, there was an article in there I wanted to save.
04:45On what?
04:47Nothing.
04:48Come on, I'm interested.
04:49Oh, let's drop it.
04:50Why can't you tell me?
04:51All right.
04:52It was all about Margaret Thatcher's secret for growing prize-winning zinnias.
04:55Are you happy?
04:58Not really.
05:03All right, Lorraine.
05:04Now, calm down and try to listen to what I'm going to say to you.
05:08Will you do that?
05:09Okay.
05:10All right.
05:10Good girl.
05:11Now, your problem...
05:13Oh, my gosh.
05:14That's call waiting.
05:15Someone else is trying to get through.
05:17Do you mind if I take it?
05:18No, no.
05:19Go right ahead.
05:20Oh, certainly a very interesting situation she's got herself in, don't you think so, Ross?
05:30Yes.
05:33Okay.
05:33I'm back.
05:34All right, Lorraine.
05:35Now, listen very carefully to what I'm going to tell you.
05:38Your problem seems to...
05:39Oh, I'm sorry.
05:41I'll be right back.
05:45For someone who's got so many problems, she certainly is popular.
05:51Okay, go ahead, Dr. Green.
05:52I'm here.
05:54Oh, I don't believe this.
05:55Another call.
05:56All right, now, hold it right there, Lorraine.
05:58The reason you want to take that other call is the same reason that you want to change your
06:02career and break up with your boyfriend.
06:04You're obsessed with what you think you're missing.
06:06The better offer, the call on the other line.
06:10Well, you've got to take one call at a time from now on.
06:13Fully explore and experience each one in its turn, and you'll be a stronger person for it.
06:19Do you follow me, Lorraine?
06:20Okay.
06:21I'm back.
06:30Thank you for your call.
06:34Well, we've only got a few minutes left, so I would like to end today's program on a personal note.
06:39As some of you may know, yesterday I was mentioned in Derek Mann's Man About Town column.
06:46He said, and I quote,
06:48I hate Frasier Crane.
06:53I hate Frasier Crane.
06:59What trenchant criticism.
07:02Move aside, Voltaire.
07:04Step back into the shadows, H.L. Macon.
07:06There's a new kid in town.
07:10One can only wonder how many hours Derek Mann sat in the glow of his computer screen
07:15before his trembling fingers sprang to life
07:18and pecked out this chef d'oeuvre.
07:23I hate Frasier Crane.
07:26A lesser critic would have wasted our time by presenting a well-thought-out, point-by-point,
07:32constructive critique of this show.
07:35But no, not our Mr. Mann.
07:39So, dear listeners, when Mr. Mann's column arrives on your doorstep,
07:42read it, enjoy it,
07:44but above all,
07:46treasure it,
07:46for one day,
07:47this man will be joining the pantheon of the immortals.
07:52And if we're lucky,
07:54it'll be one day soon.
07:58I'm Dr. Frasier Crane.
08:08Frasier, how funny running into you here.
08:10I'm always here.
08:11Yes, well, you weren't here 20 minutes ago.
08:12Have you seen today's Times?
08:14No.
08:17Lucky for you, I saved you this copy.
08:18Take a look at Derek Mann's column.
08:20You know, this is the second time in as many days that you've given me a paper.
08:24Have you ever considered getting yourself a root?
08:29Hello, I don't believe we've met.
08:30Yes, we have, Niles, three or four times.
08:33Roz Doyle.
08:34Oh, of course.
08:35It was at the, uh...
08:37It was during the, uh...
08:40Oh, well, I'm far too successful to feel awkward.
08:42Where did we meet?
08:45The radio station?
08:47I'll take your word for it.
08:49Nice to see you again.
08:50Apparently, Mr. Mann heard your program yesterday.
08:53So, I see.
08:54Yesterday afternoon,
08:55Dr. Frasier Crane got on my case
08:57for not giving him a point-by-point criticism of his radio show.
09:01Well, he asked for it, so here goes.
09:03Oh, my God.
09:04His entire column is about your show.
09:07Not very flattering, either.
09:08Toward the end, he even attacks your dim-witted sidekick call screener.
09:12That's me.
09:13Oh, now I remember you.
09:19It's hard to say what to hate most about Crane's show.
09:22His pompous, sanctimonious style,
09:24his constant self-congratulatory references to his own life,
09:27or his voice,
09:29a mock-sympathetic tone,
09:31so sickly sweet,
09:32one wonders if the man graduated from medical school
09:35or from some mind-controlling cult.
09:38It's continued on 12.
09:40I've read enough.
09:42Can I get you folks anything?
09:43How could the man say something like that?
09:45That's my job.
09:46I'm a waiter.
09:49We don't want anything, thank you.
09:51Listen, Frasier, I know this stinks,
09:53but in a couple of days, it'll blow over.
09:55Oh, perhaps you're right.
09:57As angry as it makes me,
09:58to retaliate would be
09:59to stoop to his level.
10:01The best response is no response at all.
10:05Pompous and sanctimonious, am I?
10:08Well, this man character
10:09can't even write grammatical sentences.
10:11Every five words,
10:12there's another one of his precious dot, dot, dots.
10:15Must be because he likes making all those dots
10:16with the crayon he writes this dribble with.
10:22Dr. Crane, on line two, we have Stuart,
10:24who's having a problem with delayed gratification.
10:27Well, he's just gonna have to wait.
10:30I don't know who this Derek man thinks he is,
10:33but if he thinks he can hide behind his newspaper
10:35like some sniveling schoolchild
10:37cowering behind a tree,
10:39then I say let's expose this Derek man for what he is.
10:41Not a man at all, but half a man.
10:44Now, what line did you say Stuart was on?
10:47He hung up.
10:48Well, I'm leaving all sorts of bodies in my wake today.
10:51Let's see who's on line five.
10:54Hello, this is Dr. Frasier Crane.
10:57I'm listening.
10:58Good, because I was listening too.
11:00And you are?
11:01Derek man.
11:03I see.
11:07Look, nobody calls me half a man,
11:09especially some Ivy League twit.
11:11So what do you say we settle this?
11:13Like men.
11:15Are you implying that you want to fight me?
11:18I'm not implying it.
11:19I'm saying it.
11:20Fight as in a fist fight?
11:22No, I thought we might throw pies at each other.
11:26So, are you up to it?
11:27Or aren't you man enough?
11:36We'll be right back after these messages.
11:41And we're back.
11:42Well, we have a surprise caller on the line.
11:45Derek Mann.
11:46So what's it going to be, Crane?
11:48You going to fight me or not?
11:49Oh, you can't be serious.
11:51Just like I figured.
11:52You're chicken.
11:53No, I just don't think that civilized people behave that way.
11:56You know, Ross, perhaps our listeners have an opinion about that subject.
11:59Who do we have on the line?
12:01Well, lines one through eight are people who think you're chicken.
12:05You're chicken, Crane.
12:07Admit it.
12:07I am not chicken.
12:10Look, we are mature thinking people, not cavemen.
12:14Oh, all right.
12:15You want to fight so bad, I'll give you a fight.
12:17You just named a time and place.
12:18Kinsley Square, right outside your office, by the old statue, noon tomorrow.
12:23Don't back out.
12:25I won't.
12:28And don't you back out either.
12:30Because I know where your office is, too.
12:32And I know where you live.
12:34And I'll track you down.
12:38Now, who else out there wants a piece of me?
12:43Having a look at that old murder case again?
12:46Yeah, I dug out the old crime scene photos.
12:48Well, don't be a greedy guts.
12:50Let's have a look.
13:00Her name was Helen.
13:03Yeah, it was.
13:05Oh, you must have seen that on some of the papers I had laying around here.
13:08No.
13:08I just got this feeling when I touched the picture.
13:11You're putting me on.
13:13She had a lot of men in her life.
13:15No kidding.
13:16She was a hooker.
13:18No.
13:19I mean, she had four brothers.
13:23That's amazing.
13:24She did have four brothers.
13:27What else are you getting?
13:29Well, come on.
13:30Tell me more.
13:31I can't just turn it on and off like a force.
13:36Give it a try, will you?
13:37Please.
13:38What else are you getting?
13:40Nothing.
13:41No, wait.
13:42I see a man.
13:44Yeah?
13:45A well-dressed man.
13:47He's wearing wingtips and a trench coat.
13:49Yeah?
13:50Yeah?
13:51He's getting off an elevator.
13:53He's walking down a long hallway.
13:56She doesn't know he's coming.
13:58He's opening the door.
14:00Hello, everyone.
14:05Sometimes I get my signals crossed.
14:09What's going on?
14:10Well, unless you killed a hooker when you were 12, not the march.
14:15We heard your show today.
14:17Oh.
14:17I just love the way you handled that Derek man.
14:20Ah, you made your old man proud.
14:22Yeah, the best part was when he challenged you to a fight and you stood right up to him.
14:26Yes, I did, didn't I?
14:29Boy, I can't wait to see that.
14:32Well, I'm not actually going to go through with it, Dad.
14:35What are you talking about?
14:37Well, I already won our little war of words.
14:40Well, would I stand to benefit by actually going through with a fist fight?
14:44Frasier, maybe I'm misunderstanding something here.
14:47He challenged you and you're backing down?
14:51Well, mature people are supposed to use their intellect to settle their differences.
14:56A man doesn't just turn tail and run.
14:57That's not the way I brought you up.
14:59Are you encouraging me to fight?
15:01Damn right I am.
15:02You gave the guy your word.
15:03I didn't even know what I was saying.
15:04I hadn't even had lunch yet.
15:07I might have known this had happened.
15:09It's Billy Creasel all over again.
15:12What did you say?
15:14Something about a Billy Creasel, I believe.
15:16I can't believe you're dredging that up.
15:17That was 30 years ago.
15:19Who's this Billy Creasel?
15:20Oh, he was a kid in fifth grade that used to torment me.
15:23Yeah, so one day Frasier made fun of Billy's crew cut.
15:25Well, he started and made fun of the elbow patches on my blazer.
15:32Well, the point is, they were supposed to meet for a fight after school.
15:35Only Patches here didn't show up.
15:37I had a clarinet lesson!
15:41You don't need to remind me of that.
15:43Billy's old man was a cop, too.
15:44Boy, the guys wrote me about that excuse of yours for years.
15:47Every time I couldn't make it out for a drink, they'd say,
15:49What's the matter?
15:50You got a clarinet lesson?
15:52Couldn't you have met Billy after the clarinet lesson?
15:56Daphne, would you please excuse us for a moment?
15:59Of course.
16:01I have a feeling I'm going to be excused quite a lot in this house.
16:07Dad, I am sorry if I embarrassed you for not fighting Billy Creasel 30 years ago.
16:13But the situation is not the same now.
16:15It's exactly the same.
16:16I am an adult now.
16:17I have been to medical school.
16:18I hold a certain position in this city.
16:20I do not settle my differences with brawling.
16:22The man challenged you, you accepted.
16:24Dad, I can believe this.
16:25You won't be happy until I come home with a black eye.
16:27I just want you to do what you said you were going to do.
16:30You know, you can talk about your medical school,
16:32your intellect,
16:33your place in this city.
16:36But you know what?
16:38It's all one big clarinet lesson.
16:42I can't even look at you.
16:44I can't even look at you.
16:55So, I step out of the shower, I look out the window,
16:59and I notice the garbage man looking right in at me.
17:02So, I say, did you get a good look?
17:04And he says, not completely, turn around.
17:08Then he smiles, and he's missing a tooth,
17:10and that's when the romance went right out of it for me.
17:15Roz, why are you telling me this story?
17:17I am trying to get your mind off the fact
17:19that in five minutes,
17:20you're going to walk out in that square
17:21and get your clock clean.
17:23Yes, well, did it ever occur to you
17:25that I might actually win this fight?
17:27Your shoe's untied.
17:29If you fell for that one,
17:30you're going down,
17:31and you're going down home.
17:35Well, Frasier, there's quite a crowd forming out there.
17:38Secretaries with bag lunches,
17:39businessmen, children with balloons.
17:41All that's missing is a mariachi band.
17:43They're setting up.
17:46Well, I'd better go find a great place in the crowd.
17:49I'll be off to the left, Frasier,
17:51if you tear his ear off
17:51and want to throw it to a beautiful senorita.
17:56Frasier, as your brother and as your friend,
17:59why are you doing this?
18:03It's Billy Greasel.
18:04Where?
18:11He's not here, Niles.
18:13It's just that
18:15I ran away from him when I was ten.
18:17I remember.
18:18You know, and I've been...
18:20I've been running ever since.
18:23Well, this is where it stops.
18:26I'm not running anymore.
18:27What is it that makes us crane boys such targets?
18:37Chalk it up to random violence.
18:43Hey there.
18:46Dad, what are you doing here?
18:47Look, son, I said a couple of things last night
18:50that maybe went over the line.
18:52Look, Dad, if you were worried that you
18:54talked me into something that I wasn't ready to do,
18:56you're wrong.
18:58You can relax.
18:58I...
19:00I'm doing this for myself.
19:01Good.
19:03So, uh, who told you that I was going through with it anyway?
19:06Ah, let's just say a father knows certain things about his son.
19:12Good news.
19:13I parked in front of a broken meter.
19:15We're getting a freebie.
19:17Well, good luck, Dr. Crane, with the fight.
19:19Thank you, Daphne.
19:21Uh, any psychic predictions on the outcome?
19:24Actually, yes.
19:25But don't worry, I'm frequently wrong.
19:31Fraser, Fraser, come here.
19:32There's something I want you to see.
19:34There.
19:36The man standing to the left of the statue.
19:38I recognize his picture from the newspaper.
19:40That's Derek Mann.
19:40Um, he's gigantic.
19:45My God, you could show a movie on his back.
19:50You sure you want to go through with this?
19:53Yes.
19:53Yes, I am.
19:54Good.
19:55Now, you'll be fine.
19:56Just remember, this is a street fight, not a boxing match.
19:59So fight dirty and throw the first punch.
20:01First punch.
20:02I've found that a swift knee to the groin usually does the trick.
20:05If you have any doubts, check with a fellow in Manchester named Nigel Tavers.
20:10Well, if we want an unobstructed view, look, I'd prefer it if you guys just stayed here.
20:15You'll only make me nervous.
20:16Whatever you want.
20:19Well, wish me luck.
20:23Check that.
20:30Look at a mariachi band out there.
20:32Yes.
20:33I have to get their card.
20:34I need someone for our summer barbecue.
20:36Oh, look.
20:38They're starting to fight.
20:39No, they're just surfing, sizing each other up.
20:42Come on, Frasier.
20:43If you've got to hit him, hit him first.
20:46Is that the police?
20:47Yeah, it is.
20:48What are they doing here?
20:49They're breaking it up.
20:50Just when they were getting started.
20:56All right, all right.
20:57I'm coming along peacefully.
20:58Just let me get my jacket.
20:59Relax, I'm not arresting you.
21:01And I'm warning you, in this town, we don't settle our differences with street fights, no matter who you are.
21:07Well, thank you, officer.
21:08You'll have no more trouble from me.
21:10Okay.
21:12Jesus, Dad, Dad, did you see me?
21:14Look at me.
21:15Look at me.
21:15My hands are trembling.
21:16My chest is pounding.
21:17My mouth is all dry.
21:18My knees are like jello.
21:19I feel great.
21:22You did good.
21:23Yeah, well, you know, I mean, I was out there.
21:24I was ready.
21:25You saw that, right?
21:26I was ready.
21:27I know you were.
21:27You would have kicked his butt.
21:29From here to Tacoma.
21:30I say we celebrate.
21:31Everyone, a round of victory lattes on me.
21:40Thanks, Harry.
21:41I owe you one.
21:42No problem, Marty.
21:43Cut it kind of close, though.
21:44Another minute, I'm afraid you would have been eating sidewalk.
21:46Give me a break.
21:46I'm missing lunch for this.
21:48You could stand to miss a few lunches.
21:50Say, so many guys are getting together later down at Duke's for a beer.
21:53Why don't you come along?
21:54Yeah, maybe I will.
21:55And you know why I will?
21:57Because the crane boys don't take clarinet lessons anymore.
22:00What the hell are you talking about?
22:03Oh, that's right.
22:04You weren't in my precinct.
22:10Hey, baby, I hear the blues are calling tossed salads and scrambled eggs.
22:16Oh, my.
22:17And maybe I seem a bit confused.
22:20Well, maybe.
22:20But I got you pegged.
22:22Ha, ha, ha, ha.
22:24But I don't know what to do with those tossed salads and scrambled eggs.
22:30They're calling again.
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