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#TaskmasterUKS21E02
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00:02Don't look away
00:16I might just do this all day
00:33Hello, thank you, welcome to Taskmaster, a herd of comedy wildebeest being whittled down by the natural selection of their
00:41own incompetence
00:42What lies in wait for them at the watering hole today?
00:45Huh, let's get in the Jeep Jeep and go and find out
00:47I hope it's not a comedy crocodile
00:51Please welcome
00:52Amy Gledhill
00:56Armando Iannucci
00:58Joanna Payne
01:00Joel Domet
01:02And Kamal Nanjani
01:06And next to me, a man whose favourite films, he tells me, are the carry-on films
01:12Because it reminds him of a golden time in mainstream culture
01:15When women could be openly objectified
01:17And it was okay to acknowledge that some foreign accents are just hilarious
01:24Little Alotard
01:28It's a paraphrasing
01:30Let's get going
01:32C, Senor Davies
01:33And the prize task category this week is the most unquestionable thing of beauty
01:38WHISTLE
01:39Yes, it's clear cut
01:40It's unquestionable
01:42And yet he will question them and judge them and give maximum points for the most unquestionable one
01:47Such is his right
01:48And that was a reading from Corinthians chapter 9 verse 18
01:52Let's do this
01:53Who should we have first?
01:54Joanna Page
01:54My thing of unquestionable beauty is unquestionable evidence of the fact that I was voted Wales's sexiest woman in 2009
02:09This is what she's brought in to represent unquestionable beauty
02:13Oh
02:15You might think this is shallow, right?
02:18But this isn't mine
02:18This is taken from my mother's scrapbook
02:21And this is going on like 20 years old
02:24And she still has this
02:25And she has this because she's proud of me
02:28Yeah
02:28And if this doesn't say about the unquestionable beauty of a mother's love for her daughter
02:34Then I don't know what does
02:36And it gets me here
02:38Right
02:42I think that is a very strong star
02:45Thank you
02:45Right, we're off
02:46Come out
02:47I brought in something that I find to be very beautiful
02:49And I cannot believe my friend found it in the trash
02:52Oh, what?
02:52Look at this, Greg
02:55It's a painting that is absolutely gorgeous
02:59It just looks like this ghostly child's being held captive
03:02It's grotesque
03:04Thank you
03:05Can we look at the back of it, please?
03:07Yeah, the back looks like this
03:09It says T-Pain
03:11Why does it say the name of the King of Artertune on the back?
03:14Because it's art, Greg
03:16And I think the painting's haunted
03:18I've been trying to get rid of it for years
03:21I didn't even ship it here
03:22It was just in my hotel room when I checked in
03:25I really hope I lose this episode
03:28Well, you're off to a great start
03:33I don't know
03:34It's my wife took it
03:35She's normally a very good photographer
03:36She said it was an accident
03:37Yeah, this is a photo of Armando
03:39So
03:42I think it's a hack
03:43Because it actually shows just how, in question of beautiful, the whole of planet Earth is
03:49The nature, the sky
03:52And how unbelievably insignificant we are as part of it
03:56I don't know how insignificant the haunting Egg Island is
04:02Two left, Greg
04:03Amy
04:03I have brought a painting of Yorkshire
04:06Oh
04:07Because I think Yorkshire's beautiful
04:08And I've made a very special frame
04:11Which I'd like to show you
04:12Which I think makes it even more beautiful
04:14Well, take a look at this
04:23Who did the painting?
04:25My friend Poppy Hillstead
04:26From Yorkshire?
04:27Yeah
04:30I like it very much
04:32Joel, what have you brought us?
04:34I've also gone for a painting, Amy
04:36Take a look at this, Greg
04:45It's pretty good
04:46I know what you've done
04:48You know what I've done?
04:49If you've not guessed, that it's your head and that's your body
04:53Oh my
04:54Oh, is it your body?
04:56It's your body
04:57It's your head and that's little Alex Horne on the pants
04:59Yeah, I see that
05:01I see that
05:01You and I make a great hybrid
05:03Oh, it's sort of so sad
05:06Because I'll never get to see that in real life
05:08Really, it's just that head on top of a bag of suet
05:14Right, do you want to score these beautiful things?
05:17It's tough
05:18Mmm
05:18Because I was quite touched by all but one
05:23There's one to come out
05:24And you'll thank me for that
05:25I think there's got to be a gap between creepy child and the others
05:28I'm going to give muscly me three points
05:31Muscly me
05:31OK, so three points to Joel
05:33I'm going to give Armando's Head Island four points
05:36Thank you
05:37The general populace would love the bond between mother and daughter
05:41And the people of Yorkshire would love to be celebrated
05:45by a picture surrounded by Yorkshire puddings
05:48And thus, five points each to the two ladies
05:50There we go, five points to Amy, five points to Joanna
05:55Let us toss
05:56Yes, and we'll begin with something you and I struggle with before every recording, Greg
06:00Kissing?
06:01No, it's what to wear
06:02What to wear
06:03What to wear
06:04What to wear?
06:17Hey me
06:17Hello
06:18Big deep breath in you go
06:22OK
06:23Ooh, echo
06:25Yeah
06:25Do you like the acoustics?
06:26Yeah
06:27Whoa
06:28Yeah, it makes my skull vibrate
06:31Is it warm in there?
06:32It's warm and loud
06:34I feel like I should be grabbing money at the end of the crystal maze
06:37What's that?
06:38Oh, it's another show
06:39No
06:40It was popular before this one was
06:42I want to keep the seals, I'm going to keep all these seals
06:45For eBay
06:47It's lovely and sunny
06:49Oh my god
06:50Choose how much of Alex's bowling outfit to wear throughout part two
06:57If you choose Alex's bowling overalls, your final time will be reduced by two minutes
07:03If you choose Alex's bowling gloves, your final time will be reduced by three minutes
07:08If you choose Alex's bowling glasses, your time will be reduced by four minutes
07:14If you choose Alex's bowling shoes, your final time will be reduced by five minutes
07:21If you choose to wear Alex's whole bowling outfit, your final time will be reduced by 20 minutes
07:29You have one minute
07:32Your time starts now
07:34The more I choose, my final time will be reduced by 20 minutes, so that's good
07:38I want to reduce my time
07:40Who knows?
07:41There may be a hindrance
07:42There may be
07:43I'm going to go for bowling overalls
07:45Bowling overalls
07:47I'm going to put your bowling glasses on
07:49Okay
07:50So I will wear the shoes and the gloves
07:55Your time will be reduced by eight minutes
07:57I'm going to go the whole outfit then, am I?
08:00Overalls, gloves, glasses and shoes
08:02Yeah
08:03I choose to wear your whole outfit
08:05Good stuff, I'll bring it to you now
08:06He, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he, he
08:10Oh, God
08:17Who the two people chose to hold outfits? What's your thinking with that?
08:20This is quite interesting about this show.
08:22You know, it makes you realise who you are as a person, you know?
08:26And I've realised I'm really excited and fucking stupid.
08:31LAUGHTER
08:31Let's see what the skittle outfits did, shall we?
08:34Yes, well, decisions have been made.
08:36Will they regret those decisions?
08:37Of course they will.
08:45MUSIC PLAYS
08:46PHONE RINGS
08:48Oh, hi, Joanna. Hello.
08:50You're wearing my bowling glasses.
08:51I am. They're very nice.
08:54Yeah, they help.
08:56I did say there's something Guantanamo about this whole process,
09:01didn't I?
09:02Yeah, I strongly disagree with that.
09:05I think I've got my technique down.
09:07Yeah.
09:07And I've never worn these.
09:09You look good.
09:11Jake!
09:12Yeah. You wouldn't lie to me now.
09:14I know.
09:14Well, yeah, please be careful.
09:17Find and open the task and give it a good read.
09:22LAUGHTER
09:24LAUGHTER
09:26LAUGHTER
09:26LAUGHTER
09:28LAUGHTER
09:29LAUGHTER
09:31There we go. Well done.
09:34Get the bowling ball in the bucket.
09:38You must stay on stage at all times.
09:41There is a two-minute time penalty.
09:45Any skittle touched.
09:48And all skittles must be standing when the bowling ball enters the bucket.
09:53Fastest wins. Your time started when you stepped on the stage.
09:56Where's the bowling ball? Oh!
09:58All right. Oh, no.
10:00LAUGHTER
10:05APPLAUSE
10:06The thing I already love about this group of contestants
10:09is that none of them might.
10:12Like, when you find out it's some awful outfit
10:14that's going to make things so much worse, you're like...
10:17LAUGHTER
10:17LAUGHTER
10:18Joanna was just...
10:19LAUGHTER
10:20Like, they're really excited.
10:22I know.
10:22Because they were really good fun to put on.
10:25Yeah.
10:26OK, let's bowl.
10:27Well, up first it is Amy G and Joe P.
10:31Get the bowling ball in the bucket.
10:35LAUGHTER
10:37On the stage.
10:39It's quite near the skittles.
10:40It's right near the skittles.
10:42Oh, I can...
10:43I can see it!
10:45Oh, right, OK.
10:48Get the bowling ball in the bandit.
10:52Oh, shoot!
10:53Oh, ho, ho!
10:54Oh, my God, no!
10:55No!
10:56No!
10:57No!
11:04The good news is you've only touched one skittle.
11:06Oh, my God, do I have to put all of these back up
11:08for when it goes in?
11:09I think so.
11:10OK.
11:11Oh, my God.
11:12This isn't how I expected this to go.
11:15All right.
11:16All right.
11:18Standing them up.
11:19One at a time.
11:22Oh.
11:23OK.
11:24Oh, my God, no, don't.
11:26LAUGHTER
11:27Oh, my God, no, don't.
11:30Oh, no, don't.
11:33Oh, no, don't.
11:35No!
11:37LAUGHTER
11:37I reckon I'm on for losing this task.
11:42Naughty dogs.
11:44Running away.
11:47Those ones there.
11:48Three left.
11:50Two left.
11:51Is it all up?
11:54Stop the clock!
11:56Stop the clock!
11:57Stop the clock!
12:00Sort of quite poetic, the way that they both just went...
12:04It was poetic, yeah.
12:06But they all had to be standing up when the ball went in the bucket.
12:08And they did badly.
12:09LAUGHTER
12:10Amy took 32 minutes.
12:13LAUGHTER
12:13But you saved 20 minutes while wearing the full outfit.
12:16Oh, yes, yes.
12:17But you did touch every single Skittle.
12:18That's 54 Skittles.
12:20OK.
12:20Two-minute penalty per Skittle,
12:21so that's a punishment of 108 minutes plus...
12:24LAUGHTER
12:24Plus the 12 minutes.
12:25You took exactly two hours.
12:28Wow.
12:29Joanna, you actually only took 5 minutes 59 to get that.
12:31Really?
12:32Wow.
12:32And also touched every single Skittle,
12:34so your total time was 109 minutes and 59 seconds,
12:37so you're about 10 minutes quicker.
12:38You're in the lead.
12:39Yes.
12:40Now, in a sad reflection of the state of our society,
12:43we must pause for some gambling adverts.
12:45I don't think it's advert time.
12:47You want a bet?
12:48Yes.
12:49LAUGHTER
12:55APPLAUSE
13:02Hello!
13:03We're back and it's part two
13:04and there's a ball that badly needs to be banged into a bucket.
13:08Who's next?
13:09That's right, kids.
13:10It's Joel and Amanda.
13:12I don't regret my decision.
13:14I bet you're all thinking that I regret it.
13:16You guys can absolutely do one.
13:19Ooh!
13:21The number of Skittles I touch.
13:25Do be careful.
13:27Two minutes each.
13:28See you later.
13:31One.
13:32One?
13:34Well, I might do two.
13:36Don't regret it.
13:41Musik.
13:41This'll be very heavy.
13:44Oh, oh.
13:46Music.
13:48God, Jesus.
13:50OOAH!
13:52OOAH!
13:52OOAH!
13:53OOAH!
13:54OOAH!
13:57OOAH!
13:57What were they standing when the ball were in the bucket?
14:01you have it on record you filmed that didn't you
14:07you're putting your hopes on the freeze frame with that ball going in the bucket
14:10they're still on their feet these skittles yeah task complete
14:202-4
14:22oh fuck off
14:25shit
14:28shit
14:51I don't regret it.
14:52No.
14:55I don't regret it.
15:10Stop the clock.
15:12Wow.
15:13I don't regret it.
15:15Stop the clock.
15:25Wow.
15:35What a shit.
15:37Yeah.
15:38Yeah.
15:38Oh, he is.
15:39He is a little shit.
15:40Oh, my God, yes.
15:40Well, I put it there to make it easier.
15:42You didn't have to...
15:43Yeah, yeah, yeah.
15:46Who'd have thought that your fingers scrambling around trying to get into a bowling ball would
15:51be so tense?
15:53I kind of enjoyed the drama of it, watching it back.
15:55Oh, Christ, I was on the edge of my seat.
15:56He was very close to nailing the task.
15:58You were quick.
15:59Three minutes 20, you put the ball in.
16:00And you did offer me the option of then saying you've got time to pick them all up.
16:04And I thought that was funny.
16:06I want to just stop at the funny.
16:07And also, I couldn't be bothered.
16:10Do you regret not regretting it with the wisdom of hindsight?
16:13I think it was absolutely fine.
16:15You know, it was an adventure.
16:17And hopefully that adventure didn't cost me too much time.
16:19You were almost exactly the same as Amy, because you touched every single skittle.
16:23You were wearing all the outfits, so it was minus 20 but plus 108.
16:26And you took 28 minutes and 46 seconds, so you were ever so slightly quicker than Amy.
16:31I don't regret it.
16:33Who's next?
16:34Yes, well, there's only one person left to see.
16:37According to his resume, he's agile, he's strong, he's sexy, he's smart.
16:42And he's made for exactly this sort of task.
16:44Yes.
16:44He's Kumail Nanjani.
16:55I've touched two skittles.
16:56Yes.
17:03OK, you've not touched that one.
17:06Clever.
17:12All right.
17:12I'm learning.
17:15OK.
17:25This feels like a big moment.
17:44This is the worst thing that's ever happened to me.
17:55Oh.
18:04Get the water.
18:06I'm getting a cramp.
18:07Hold on.
18:16Can you get me a banana?
18:18Yeah, I'll get you a banana.
18:20I'm just going now.
18:33Are you in quite a lot of pain?
18:36Yeah.
18:36I could offer you a certain amount of time per skittle and I could give you a hand.
18:41You could...
18:41What?
18:42You can give me a hand?
18:44Well...
18:45Yeah, how much?
18:46If I'm touching them, that's two minutes per skittle.
18:48I'll give you one minute.
18:49And I don't benefit from that.
18:5185 seconds?
18:53OK.
18:54Yeah?
18:55Sure.
18:56OK.
18:5985 seconds.
19:03170 seconds.
19:21It did go in the bucket.
19:22It's not in the bucket.
19:23It was in the bucket for a moment.
19:33Do it gingerly this time.
19:36I've stopped the clock, Camille.
19:40Well done.
19:45I had conflicting emotions watching you.
19:47Like, there were very clever things.
19:49Like, you came up with the not touching the skittle system.
19:52And I thought, ah, that's clever.
19:53And then very quickly after it, I thought, I'm not going to have to watch him move all of them.
20:00I decided that no matter how long it took, I was going to get them done and I was only
20:05going to touch two skittles.
20:06You did touch four in the end and you took nearly 40 minutes to do it.
20:10But because of my bargaining, the maths means that the 85 second penalty per skittles that I touch, you actually
20:16got it in 55 minutes and 13 seconds.
20:18You actually were the fastest out of the five of them.
20:20I won that.
20:21We won this task.
20:22We won this task.
20:27Let's give some points out, you.
20:29OK, well, Armando did not really finish the task.
20:32Couldn't care less.
20:34I don't regret it.
20:36OK.
20:37The zero to Armando.
20:38We jump up, then Amy, two hours, two points somehow.
20:41Joel, nearly two hours, three points.
20:43Joanna, also nearly two hours, four points.
20:46But the winner of the task, five points, it's Camille and Jeremy!
20:50Do you think you can see a scoreboard, please?
20:52I do.
20:53Armando, you won't be surprised to hear, you're currently in last place, four points.
20:57And at the top, she won the first episode.
20:59She's winning this one.
20:59Joanna Page has nine points.
21:01CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
21:04Next one, please.
21:06OK, but let's just slow down a moment and take some time to reflect.
21:20Hello?
21:22Oh!
21:25Hello?
21:28Oh!
21:30Ah!
21:31Oh!
21:34Hello!
21:38Oh, my God, I thought it was a mirror!
21:40LAUGHTER
21:42Shout out to the art department.
21:45Absolutely fantastic.
21:46Oh!
21:46Whoa!
21:47This is incredible!
21:50Right, OK.
21:51Oh, there you...
21:51Oh, hello.
21:53Right.
21:54Yes.
21:55Ah, yes.
21:56Yes.
21:59Hey.
22:01Alex?
22:02Come out.
22:04Ooh!
22:06Oh, no!
22:08Didn't think so.
22:09Shall I?
22:09Yes, please.
22:12OK.
22:12That was great, man.
22:15Like, exhilarate.
22:17Exhilarating.
22:17Yep.
22:18Do exactly what your reflection does.
22:20You must decide what Alex does, then mirror him.
22:23Most ambitious...
22:24But also accurate mirroring wins.
22:27You have a maximum of 20 minutes.
22:30Your time starts now.
22:31OK.
22:33So, I've got 20 minutes to decide what my...
22:35My...
22:35Me do for...
22:37OK.
22:38Do you?
22:40So, I decide what you do, and then I do it with you.
22:45Mm-hm.
22:45Ideally, something I'm good at.
22:48I just need to think about ambitious, er...
22:51Yes.
22:52I'll leave you to it.
22:52Yeah.
22:53Can you do a handstand?
22:55No.
22:55Can you?
22:56Yeah.
22:57Ah.
22:58You can teach me.
22:59Like, I feel like we should learn a dance.
23:0120 minutes, I think, like, we could, like, get it down.
23:04Scoop.
23:05Scoop.
23:05I'm gonna scoop that way.
23:06Scoop.
23:08Let's get a couple easels, and then we'll paint.
23:11And...
23:12What are we gonna paint?
23:13That's up to you.
23:14You know what?
23:15I think you paint whatever you want to paint.
23:17All you've gotta do...
23:18I don't even know if I can genuinely do a handstand now.
23:20I'm 48 and I've had four children.
23:22I'm gonna try and see if it's possible.
23:24Are you ready?
23:25OK.
23:26Ah!
23:27It's not possible!
23:30Oh, God!
23:32Oh, God!
23:35Oh, God!
23:43I can't think we're ever gonna see anything less ambitious than the time between you announcing you can do a
23:51handstand and the reality.
23:52Oh, my God!
23:53I really thought I could still do them!
23:55When was the last time you did one?
23:57Probably when I was about 12!
23:59LAUGHTER
24:00So, ambition.
24:01Ambition and accuracy, Greg.
24:03Mm.
24:03Gotta factor in the...
24:04Oh, I'll factor that in, don't you worry.
24:05Well, let's go with Amy, who went to some pretty extreme lengths to make me appear just like her.
24:14LAUGHTER
24:18Yeah.
24:30LAUGHTER
24:31LAUGHTER
24:31LAUGHTER
24:35hepatican singly
24:38MUSIC CONTINUES
24:58The accuracy was high, I thought. Thank you. Very good.
25:02I am somewhat confused by you dressing as Barry Gibb.
25:07LAUGHTER
25:09The shoot dance was good. There was lots going on.
25:12There was lots of accuracy. It's a hell of a start.
25:14Next, it's Joel.
25:15And if you're wondering if he took his top off...
25:18LAUGHTER
25:18There are no... There are no spoilers here.
25:22LAUGHTER
25:35MUSIC CONTINUES
25:36MUSIC CONTINUES
25:40MUSIC CONTINUES
25:54LAUGHTER
25:58APPLAUSE
26:00APPLAUSE
26:01That was good.
26:03Nice homoerotic thing.
26:05LAUGHTER
26:06I've seen all week.
26:08We were facing away from each other, so that's really difficult.
26:11The level of difficulty is absolutely incredible.
26:14And we took our tops off, so that's fun, right?
26:16Yeah, yeah.
26:17Yeah, I was probably more drawn in by you taking your tops off and kissing.
26:21LAUGHTER
26:22Time for an advert break, I think.
26:25We'll see you in a minute.
26:26LAUGHTER
26:26MUSIC CONTINUES
26:34Hello!
26:36Yes!
26:37Don't you worry, we're still here.
26:39The current task has seen our art department excel
26:42with a mirror illusion in a lab.
26:44And now it's Kamel looking in the mirror, as per bloody usual.
26:48LAUGHTER
26:50MUSIC CONTINUES
26:51MUSIC CONTINUES
26:51MUSIC CONTINUES
26:51MUSIC CONTINUES
27:03MUSIC CONTINUES
27:05MUSIC CONTINUES
27:09MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:10MUSIC CONTINUES
27:12MUSIC CONTINUES
27:12MUSIC CONTINUES
27:17MUSIC PLAYS
27:37How did you feel that went? I can't paint, so I don't...
27:40LAUGHTER I don't know why I chose to do that.
27:43But isn't that ambitious, ironically?
27:45It! That's why I did it.
27:48You know the thing that vexed me the most about it?
27:50Yes.
27:50You missed one of the rabbit's giant ears off.
27:53I didn't, I put both ears on the same side.
27:56On the same side?
27:57I did.
27:58What's next?
27:59Will it be a handstand performance next?
28:02Definitely not, because it's Joanna Payne.
28:06LAUGHTER
28:08LAUGHTER
28:08LAUGHTER
28:10MUSIC PLAYS
28:14MUSIC PLAYS
28:22MUSIC CONTINUES
28:23MUSIC CONTINUES
28:44What I'm interested in is the narrative of your doubts.
28:48I don't think I was even, like, human.
28:49We were sort of just emotional and it was, like, exhilarating
28:53and sort of finding some of this freedom together
28:55on an emotional plane.
28:58Ah.
28:59And then, after going round like that,
29:01that was a huge release.
29:03This is making me look at steps in a whole different way.
29:06LAUGHTER
29:07And then, from what emerged from that was,
29:09I can birth and bring life in...
29:12It's the love of a mother and a daughter!
29:15Exactly!
29:16Exactly!
29:18Wow!
29:19Wow!
29:20Wow!
29:21I enjoyed the analogy.
29:23I suspect it was all horse shit.
29:27LAUGHTER
29:27Is there any one left to see?
29:29Let's go.
29:29It is Armando's attempt now.
29:31Unfortunately, he wasn't actually available on the day,
29:33so instead, he sent Ben Kingsley in to do it for him.
29:36LAUGHTER
29:36Let's have a look at Ben Kingsley.
29:42LAUGHTER
29:43LAUGHTER
29:43END
29:44END
29:45END
29:48END
29:48END
29:51END
29:53END
29:55END
29:58END
29:59END
30:01END
30:01END
30:03END
30:03END
30:31Oh, my God, I enjoyed that.
30:33I mean, speaking of as a man of a similar vintage to you,
30:37just throwing yourself on the floor was ambitious.
30:39Yeah, bit of slapstick.
30:40Why did you decide to cast yourself as Ben Kingsley?
30:42No, I was just trying to look like him.
30:43We were trying to meet in the middle, I think, was the idea.
30:45Were we? Well, I went that way.
30:47Yeah, thank you.
30:48Was Ben Kingsley known for diving?
30:50That's why I was watching you, like, is there a reference?
30:52Let's just forget Ben Kingsley.
30:55It was me.
30:56It was just trying to look like him. That was you?
30:58No!
31:01I mean, that's how good it was.
31:04Apart from Kamels, obviously, I loved them all.
31:09One point.
31:10OK, one point to Kamel.
31:11They were all pretty powerful from this point onwards.
31:14So let's look at accuracy.
31:17Probably Joel's was slightly less accurate than the others.
31:19Yeah, I can understand that.
31:20And I'm going to give you two points, but I think it's harsh,
31:22I'll tell you that. That's all right.
31:23Now, how accurate was the universe?
31:28Slightly less accurate than the shoop-shoop, I think.
31:31So whilst it was a powerful statement about life,
31:34I can only give you three points.
31:36I'll take that.
31:36I'm going to give Amy four points because it was incredibly accurate.
31:40That is harsh.
31:40The one that moved me the most and was also accurate,
31:44and I think it will open up new doors for him.
31:47Finally, that was Armando Iannucci takes five.
31:50Five points for Armando.
31:55What is next?
31:56Well, it is my idea of heaven.
31:58Lots of instructions, a secret code, and a really big balloon.
32:14Hello?
32:17Everything all right in there?
32:18I think so.
32:20Present.
32:22Present or present?
32:24Great question.
32:26This is your sort of thing.
32:27This is my sort of thing?
32:28I think so.
32:29Do you reckon?
32:30What is my sort of thing?
32:31Fun.
32:32Fun.
32:34Right.
32:35Achieve the most things on this list.
32:38Before the balloon pops.
32:39Yes.
32:40If you do the special thing, the balloon will stop inflating for ten seconds.
32:46Ten seconds?
32:47If you do the special thing?
32:53I feel like I haven't been looking around for alternate solutions.
32:57You must not touch the balloon mechanism.
33:00Your time starts when the balloon starts inflating.
33:03The special thing?
33:05Oh, my God.
33:06Oh!
33:07Oh, gosh!
33:07Right.
33:09OK.
33:09Right.
33:11Right.
33:12What's the special thing?
33:13Stop inflating!
33:18You thought the special thing might be to say stop inflating, did you?
33:21I thought it was worth a shot.
33:24Well, this is all pretty self-explanatory, I think.
33:27I don't want to dwell.
33:27I just want to crack on and have a look.
33:29Fair enough.
33:29They were under pressure.
33:30They had to achieve a lot of different things.
33:31And we're going to begin with three of the five,
33:33and that is Joanna, Joel and Amy.
33:36One.
33:37Thread a needle.
33:40Yes.
33:41I told you it was your sort of thing.
33:42I love this.
33:45This is ridiculous.
33:46What's the special thing?
33:48I love you.
33:50OK.
33:50I found the end of the sticky tape.
33:52One.
33:52That's one.
33:53Put on the galoshes.
33:55Oh, dear.
33:56This is a mistake.
33:57Ah!
33:59Ah!
34:01Gotta get in it!
34:03Be whispered to by a man on the phone.
34:05Right.
34:06My husband never answers the phone.
34:07We're actually in the middle of an argument
34:08because he doesn't answer the phone.
34:10Hello.
34:11Chris.
34:12I need you to whisper to me on the phone.
34:14Yes.
34:15I can whisper to you.
34:16Two.
34:16Bye.
34:17Whisper, er, what you had for breakfast.
34:20I've had a pumpkin day.
34:22All right.
34:22Thanks very much.
34:23Go on.
34:23Go on.
34:23Go on.
34:24I'll put my number into yours.
34:29What do you want me to whisper?
34:30Hello.
34:31I'm a big fan of you.
34:37Done.
34:38Put on the galoshes.
34:40Put on the galoshes.
34:40We shouted out by a woman on the phone.
34:42Where's my mother?
34:43Come on, Mum.
34:45Hi, Mum.
34:46Can you just very quickly shout out what you had for breakfast?
34:49Shout at me down the phone.
34:50Oh, shout at you.
34:51One more second.
34:52Mum, you don't have to wait.
34:54Just shout.
34:55What's it is you doing?
34:56For goodness sake.
35:00Just out the scrambled egg.
35:03Thanks, Mum.
35:04Thank you very much.
35:05Find the end of the sticky tape.
35:06Right.
35:07Oh, yeah, yeah.
35:08No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
35:09I'm good at this.
35:11Oh, you are good at that.
35:12Yep.
35:12That's a sock and a pouch.
35:13Where do you think a pouch is?
35:14That's a pouch.
35:15Okay, fair enough.
35:16So up the pouch.
35:18Right, I'm going to put the galoshes on first,
35:20because that's something.
35:23They're on.
35:24They're on.
35:25I'm going to do the present first.
35:27Did it say neatly?
35:28Yep.
35:29Yeah.
35:32Good.
35:33Could you read to me what else is on the list?
35:36Say every number between 1 and 50,
35:37except for the numbers divisible by 7, 4 and 3.
35:40Howl for 30 seconds.
35:41Oh!
35:46Ah, ah, ah!
35:47Okay.
35:47I hate maths.
35:48You've done that?
35:49And to be honest, yeah, I've done it,
35:50and I've got to sew up my pouch.
35:51Where does a galosh start and a waiter end?
35:56Where do you think the pouch is?
35:57Oh, fuck!
35:58Is it in there?
36:00Ah!
36:01Have you shouted out by a woman on the phone?
36:03My wife just rang.
36:04It's perfect timing, actually.
36:06I've sewn up that.
36:07Yep, that counts.
36:09Sew up the pouch once you put a sock in it.
36:12Oh, my God!
36:13Oh!
36:14I didn't know any of it in the right order.
36:16You're so clever!
36:19Ah!
36:20Ah!
36:21Ah!
36:24Ah!
36:24Welcome to the evening.
36:27My wife just hung up a bit.
36:29Ah!
36:29Ah!
36:30Ah!
36:31Ah!
36:33Ah!
36:39Not bad.
36:40First time I've seen you on this show so far
36:43not looking like you're having the time of your life.
36:45Yeah.
36:46The threading of the needle seems to have broken you.
36:47I used the whole thing as sort of something,
36:50as some sort of way to get Alex Horne's number.
36:53LAUGHTER
36:54I loved your mum needed a beat
36:58before she would shout at you straight away.
37:00She was in the middle of Swansea town centre.
37:03Yeah.
37:03I was going, Mum, will you just shout down the phone?
37:06And she had to get herself together.
37:08I think it's a Welsh thing cos my relatives are Welsh as well
37:11and I don't think there's a lot of shouting in Wales.
37:14Cos the response to most situations is,
37:16well, there we are.
37:17Happens.
37:18LAUGHTER
37:18My mum took no persuading.
37:20Oh, she was...
37:21Scramble the egg!
37:23She was straight in.
37:24Didn't even need to know why.
37:26Well, look, Amy did pretty well.
37:28Amy got seven out of the ten things done.
37:30Oh, all right.
37:31Which is a lot better than Joel who got four,
37:33or five if you count the neatly wrapped presents.
37:35Oh, yes, I do count it.
37:37Oh.
37:37Cos he has to be rewarded for spending three hours
37:40threading an egg.
37:41OK, well, you've got half of the things done,
37:43but this pales next to Joanna,
37:45who got nine out of ten.
37:47Oh!
37:47I'm late dying on my maths today.
37:49Wow!
37:50OK, time for the last ad break of the show.
37:53We're just moments away from one of the contestants
37:55winning a portrait of my head on an Asian man's body.
37:58Has this been signed off by Channel 4, Alex?
38:01Yes.
38:04We're safe.
38:05See you after the break.
38:13Hello!
38:15Hello and welcome to part four of Taskmaster
38:17and some very speedy tasking.
38:19Oh, they're quick, they're slick,
38:21and I've done a little sick.
38:22Now, the final two attempts.
38:25First, they worked on Veep together.
38:26Now it's the next step on the entertainment career ladder.
38:29Trying to find the end of some sticky tape, howling,
38:31and putting on galoshes.
38:32Yes, it's Armando and Camille!
38:34Oh, God.
38:35Howl for 30 seconds.
38:37Oh!
38:38Oh!
38:40Oh!
38:4430 seconds.
38:45Thank you, Camille.
38:45Lovely howling.
38:47Right, here we go.
38:48Wrap.
38:49Find the end of the sticky tape.
38:51Well, I'll make an end, and then I'll find it.
38:55That was cool.
38:56See, every number between one foot except for the numbers that
38:59is by seven, four, three.
39:00So, one, two, five, ten.
39:05I can't count and wrap.
39:07Hello, baby.
39:08Hey, Emily, I'm on camera.
39:09Can you just yell at me?
39:10I can't believe how much I love you!
39:13Yeah, I love you too, bye.
39:14Present wrap.
39:15Well done.
39:16Yeah, here we are.
39:17Um, delicious.
39:19You've done the special thing, by the way.
39:21Have I done the special thing?
39:21Yeah, stop for ten seconds.
39:23Well...
39:24Right, I'm gonna do that towards the end, I think.
39:26How do I find out what the special thing is?
39:28I guess trial and error.
39:29I've threaded the needle.
39:31Tremendous work.
39:33I neatly wrapped the present.
39:35You've just done the special thing, so you know.
39:40Neatly wrapped the present.
39:43Neatly wrapped the present.
39:45What did I do?
39:47What did I do?
39:48What was the special thing that I did?
39:51Forty-one.
39:52Forty-three.
39:53Forty-six.
39:54Forty-seven.
39:55Forty-nine.
39:58How did I be whispered to by a man on the phone?
40:01Is there a number to ring?
40:02There were quite a lot of numbers you could ring.
40:05Hey, man.
40:05Hey, can you whisper to me?
40:07This is a good trust master.
40:10You're gonna fail.
40:11OK, wow, it really does sound like the inside of my own head.
40:13Thank you so much, goodbye.
40:15Sock in a pouch.
40:16Pouch.
40:16Pouch.
40:17Pouch.
40:17Pouch.
40:19Where do you think the pouch might be?
40:21Oh, it's not...
40:24Can I have your sock?
40:27What are you looking for?
40:28I did something over here and the thing stopped.
40:30Oh, I see.
40:31Are you trying to do the special thing?
40:32Is it that?
40:34Right, there we go.
40:35Well, this might make life easier.
40:49You just did the special thing again.
40:51Is it death?
40:52Yeah.
40:53Touching your head.
40:54Yeah.
40:56Hello?
40:57Hey, could you shout at me?
40:58Just shout at me.
40:59Why the hell did you forget the pins this morning?
41:02You're not shouting.
41:02You've got to shout.
41:08Well, too late.
41:11Goodbye.
41:13I forgot to do that.
41:19So you worked at the special thing and then didn't use the special thing?
41:23I just got stuck in an argument with my wife.
41:27Who just told me I hadn't put the bins out.
41:30And had you not put the bins out?
41:31I hadn't.
41:33Interesting, your partner's declaration of love for you.
41:36Not very British, that.
41:37My wife is not here with me and when I heard her voice I got teary-eyed.
41:41I really did.
41:42Oh, God.
41:43It's sickening.
41:46And presumably you've got someone who does the bins for you.
41:49No.
41:50She does the bins.
41:51Oh, sure.
41:52Yeah.
41:53So, in the end, Joel, you were last.
41:55You got five out of ten, so one point.
41:57Then Armando got six out of ten, two points.
41:59Kamel and Amy both got seven out of ten, so they share four points each.
42:02The winner of the task, five points.
42:04Nine things completed was Joanna Page.
42:08Well done, Joanna.
42:09OK.
42:09Everyone, please make you raise the stage for the final task of the show!
42:20Who will read the task?
42:22Kamel Nanjian is going to read the task.
42:24Here we go.
42:25Work out what word the piper is piping.
42:28You may have one guess and may only guess if you are the first to raise both your hands.
42:34First to two correct guesses wins.
42:37This is the piper.
42:38He's called Johnny Pipes.
42:39He'll pipe a word.
42:40You've got to try to work out what the word is.
42:41You have glockenspiels in front of you.
42:43You can try to recognise the notes that he's playing by playing your own glockenspiel.
42:46I am genuinely medically tone deaf.
42:49Medically?
42:51When you think you've got it right, raise both your hands,
42:54and then you can say your guess when I point at you.
42:56But if you're wrong, you can't guess any more for that word.
42:58OK.
42:59Just to warn you, he's got to start with a letter E to get the pipes going.
43:03So when he's ready to spell his word, he will have his leg up
43:06and he will put it down to start the word.
43:09Joel, happy?
43:10Just going to warn you, I don't understand what's going on.
43:13Let's go, Johnny.
43:23You've spelt the first word.
43:28It was low.
43:32Johnny can spell it again if you want it.
43:34Yes, please.
43:35Let's have the word again.
43:46BUZZER
43:48BUZZER
43:52BUZZER
43:52Yes, Armando.
43:53B.
43:54It is B!
43:55Yeah!
43:58Can I just say, I loved your face when Armando got a word,
44:02but your face went, it works!
44:04LAUGHTER
44:09Yeah.
44:10OK, it's one to Armando, nothing to anyone else yet.
44:12OK.
44:13Ready for the next word?
44:15Leg up, Johnny.
44:23Oh!
44:24Straight in there.
44:25Amy?
44:25Egg!
44:26It is egg!
44:27APPLAUSE
44:30How are you feeling, Joel?
44:32I feel like it's just lovely to listen to music.
44:37One to Amy, one to Armando.
44:38The words are now going to get longer.
44:41Oh, God, right.
44:42Leg up, Johnny!
44:44BUZZER
44:44BUZZER
44:44BUZZER
44:54BUZZER
44:55BUZZER
44:55BUZZER
44:55BUZZER
44:56BUZZER
44:57BUZZER
44:57BUZZER
44:58BUZZER
44:58BUZZER
44:58BUZZER
45:00BUZZER
45:01BUZZER
45:02BUZZER
45:02BUZZER
45:03BUZZER
45:03BUZZER
45:03BUZZER
45:04BUZZER
45:04BUZZER
45:04BUZZER
45:04BUZZER
45:05BUZZER
45:05BUZZER
45:06BUZZER
45:07BUZZER
45:07BUZZER
45:07BUZZER
45:07BUZZER
45:08BUZZER
45:08BUZZER
45:10BUZZER
45:10BUZZER
45:15BUZZER
45:32MUSIC PLAYS
45:34If Joel gets this, I'm going to explode.
45:37BUZZER
45:39Badge!
45:40Yeah!
45:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
45:49Let's go, Johnny.
45:50Leg up, Johnny.
45:51LAUGHTER
46:03BUZZER
46:04BUZZER
46:05What's the word, Amy?
46:06Baggage.
46:06It is baggage!
46:09CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:12OK, well, I'll bring you down and we'll add that to the final scores,
46:17but first, a big round of applause for Johnny.
46:20CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:21Come down and join me.
46:25BUZZER
46:26So, Greg, Joanna and Kamel didn't get any right,
46:29but they came joint fourth, so they get two points.
46:32Amanda and Joel, four points each for getting one right,
46:34but the winner of the task, five points,
46:36for her two correct answers is Amy Glethill!
46:38CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:42Woo-wee!
46:42Yeah, and that's enough to make her the winner of the episode
46:45with a huge 20 points!
46:47CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:49Amy Glethill wins!
46:51Woo-wee!
46:51Please go and collect your booty of unquestionable beauty!
46:56CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:00Here's your winner tonight, Amy Glethill!
47:02CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:19We're at the beginning of the Act, Amy Glethill.
47:22We as an assistantvat.com.
47:25Shoot, you're waiting for us!
47:33Oooh...
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