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00:02Don't look away
00:16I might just do this all day
00:36I'm Craig Davis butter me up put me in the oven for three hours at 200 degrees and you've got
00:42yourself a succulent roast
00:43That's ready to make judgments and the side dishes five comedians. They've been boiled blanched and steamed
00:49It's time to cover them in gravy and gobble them down with your eyes
01:06Oh
01:11Next to me 13 stone of meat that has been shaped into the rough approximation of a man by an
01:19easily distracted toddler
01:3014 stone
01:32What's this week's price category?
01:34Well this time they've brought in the most surprising quite big thing to conceal on your person
01:39I know it is. It's tricky. We all know it's easier to conceal things in a person, but these guys
01:45Know what they're doing
01:48Look at them five points for the most surprising quite big thing to conceal on your person and all five
01:53quite big things will go home
01:54Covertly with the episode winner. I'm an though. Have you concealed a big thing about your person? Yes
02:00Einstein's theory of relativity
02:03You cannot get bigger than that
02:06It's clever. It's clever. Yeah, I've also got a standard reading lamp
02:20So you mustn't break for something to eat. So my lower half is a ham and cheese baguette
02:32He's cling film meat to his legs
02:37Think of all Armando's achievements and look how pleased he is
02:42It's an incredibly strong start. I suspect it's all gonna really rapidly go downhill
02:49I've brought in my amethyst crystal and this is the crystal it's concealed somewhere on my body
02:56Well, it looks like it's just sort of probably tucked in the top of your jogging bottoms. Oh for fuck's
03:02sake
03:05We see if you're right well
03:08It's my crystal we keep it in the hallway and it brings good fortune and love and kindness and peace
03:15But once does not
03:18This may cause you to reevaluate the crystal for sticking it in your trousers. It's about to get you one
03:23point
03:25Come out we have a video. This is what Kamala's brought in
03:39It's a balloon
03:40Came along tonight
03:42Sharks pre-daked trees
03:44That is true. It is true. By, like, hundreds of years.
03:49LAUGHTER
03:49It's 150, it's very close at the beginning, 150 years.
03:53Is it really 150? No, it's...
03:55LAUGHTER
03:57It's millions, millions and millions.
04:00Good. A big thing and a big concept on it.
04:03When it was big, though, it wasn't hidden.
04:05When it was big, though, was it?
04:06I'll tell you, your big thing wasn't concealed, either.
04:10LAUGHTER
04:12Oh, my God. Hello, Amy.
04:14Hello. Let's see whether you can take on Einstein's baguette legs.
04:18LAUGHTER
04:19Ten-man life raft.
04:21Ooh. Where is the life raft now?
04:25Sorry, can I show you a picture?
04:28Earlier, Amy did this.
04:29This is me, and then...
04:32Ooooooooy!
04:34It's a life raft!
04:37LAUGHTER
04:39But then...
04:41Ooooooooy!
04:49What size do you...?
04:52Don't you...
04:52Don't dig into this!
04:53You said ten...
04:55Ten men! Ten tiny men!
04:58LAUGHTER
05:00Hi, Joel.
05:02I've got a tattoo in my hair.
05:04Here's a video of me getting it done.
05:06Listen to this.
05:07Oh, this is incredible.
05:09Oh, no.
05:09No!
05:11Here's a photo of it.
05:12We weren't condoning it, but he did that.
05:14LAUGHTER
05:15Oh, my God.
05:18APPLAUSE
05:19Is it real?
05:20Yeah, look at that.
05:22Oh, my God!
05:23Oh, yeah!
05:25Oh, my God, it's really freaky.
05:27It's weird when you see it.
05:28Can I say...
05:29LAUGHTER
05:41There's no doubt the funniest thing to happen here would be for Joel to come last.
05:46LAUGHTER
05:46We can all agree with that.
05:48LAUGHTER
05:49Like, Sharpe's doing that.
05:51Obviously, I shall be giving one point to Joanna's stupid crystal.
05:57LAUGHTER
05:58That has no magical powers and can be seen from the moon.
06:02LAUGHTER
06:02So, one point's easy.
06:03Well done.
06:04Two points for Amy, three points for Kamel.
06:06Simple as that.
06:08And now it's a big eye.
06:10Do you think that Einstein's work should be dismissed as quite big?
06:14Ooh. It's relative.
06:16LAUGHTER
06:19APPLAUSE
06:20Oh, my God, can I do it?
06:22Can a man physically scarring himself for life be beaten by baguette legs?
06:28LAUGHTER
06:28That's there forever.
06:29That's there forever.
06:30I know.
06:31But I am.
06:32I'm going to let him win.
06:34LAUGHTER
06:36There's one the people want.
06:38LAUGHTER
06:39It's OK.
06:40It's OK.
06:42It's OK.
06:435.1 on the energy.
06:46APPLAUSE
06:46That's on a proper task.
06:48Yes, and I think I know exactly which one this is.
07:04MUSIC PLAYS
07:05I think Amy's coming in.
07:07Hello! Coming in!
07:09Hello, Amy. I thought it might be you.
07:10Hello!
07:12Alexander Horner.
07:13I thought it was going to be you.
07:14I like it in here.
07:15I like it in here.
07:15Me too.
07:16What are you doing here?
07:17I do everything in here.
07:19Everything.
07:20Everything?
07:21Everything.
07:22Everything.
07:23Fall in love?
07:24Ah.
07:25Not yet.
07:26Mm-mm.
07:28Is it happening now?
07:30Write down a prediction.
07:33Write down a prediction for an unlikely situation to occur
07:36in exactly 15 minutes' time.
07:39Then make that unlikely situation occur.
07:42Most unlikely situation to occur in exactly 15 minutes' time wins.
07:46Those 15 minutes start now, and you must write down your prediction
07:50within the next five minutes.
07:57OK, well, I'll go for it.
07:58I don't know how I'll make it happen.
08:01Wow.
08:02Doesn't seem very likely.
08:04Very unlikely.
08:05APPLAUSE
08:09Well, I'm pretty certain Armando fell asleep during this.
08:14You want to see some predictions?
08:15You know I do.
08:16It's Amy and Joel.
08:17Here we go.
08:19Want to read it?
08:20Yes, please.
08:21Make a hole-in-one.
08:23In golf.
08:24The golf ball will also have a picture of me on it.
08:27A Joel-in-one.
08:28A Joel-in-one.
08:29I was going to call somebody up there working.
08:31I know.
08:32Get someone in the countryside.
08:34Countryside's weird, isn't it?
08:35All sorts of mad stuff happens there.
08:40OK, you need to get a hole-in-one in exactly 10 minutes' time.
08:43This kind of makes the game of golf more fun, you know?
08:45What if they had to make their own holes?
08:51Hello.
08:51Hello.
08:52What are you doing in the next sort of 12 minutes?
08:56I don't bug a hole today.
08:57OK.
08:58Well.
08:58I'm well, but I'm OK.
08:59Oh!
09:00What do you think?
09:01You run well?
09:02It's just...
09:03I was unwell last week, and then what I did was go to a company festival from 10 o'clock
09:07in morning till 1 o'clock in morning for three days.
09:10I was just about getting better, and then I did that, so...
09:12Three minutes.
09:13OK.
09:14Anyway...
09:15I need to ask you to do something unexpected in the countryside.
09:18You know that bus stop that's across the road from your house with the mosaic?
09:21Yeah.
09:22You could go to that bus stop, couldn't you?
09:23My prediction is, a man goes to a bus stop in rural England and sings a song about antelopes
09:30with dried pasta in his pockets.
09:32OK.
09:33Nine minutes 15.
09:36Perfect.
09:37Chris, you there?
09:38I need to...
09:39It's the filming bit.
09:40I need to do it again.
09:41Seven minutes.
09:42Seven minutes.
09:42Film it landscape.
09:44All right.
09:45All right.
09:46Bye.
09:47Bye-bye.
09:47Oh, nice.
09:48That feels good, isn't it?
09:51Whoa!
09:52Do my eye in.
09:54Whoa!
09:54That went over the fence!
09:55Ooh!
09:56You're getting closer, but then you are also getting closer.
09:59I'm also getting closer.
10:01Two minutes 20.
10:01OK.
10:02Good.
10:03Good.
10:03Good.
10:07You've got a minute.
10:0850 seconds.
10:10Shut up.
10:13It's near the donkey.
10:1620 seconds.
10:19Five.
10:21Four.
10:23Three.
10:24Two.
10:26One.
10:28That, my friend, is a Joel and one.
10:31I've got it.
10:32Oh, yeah?
10:33Yeah, so there's the bus stop with the mosaic.
10:34Yeah.
10:35See the pasta?
10:36Yeah.
10:36Please come take this away and analyse it.
10:38What, my phone?
10:39Yeah.
10:41Goodbye.
10:41Goodbye!
10:42Goodbye!
10:42Hmm.
10:44Don't scrawl.
10:46APPLAUSE
10:50I think there's a lot of people in this room who went,
10:53Oh, no, don't scrawl.
10:54Don't scrawl!
10:55No-one's ever done this before.
10:57Just get someone else to do the task.
11:00And as far as I can work out, you're just getting some stranger
11:04to create a scene from Last of the Summer Wives.
11:07But how unlikely is that?
11:08Oh, it's a work of genius.
11:10Oh, good.
11:11Joel, I enjoyed the pun.
11:13I feel like, during this series, I'm getting you on the pun vibe.
11:17You are dragging me over to the pun side of life.
11:21I've just got a question.
11:22When you do a hole-in-one, in this instance, were you not in control
11:26of the starting point for the hole-in-one?
11:29Yeah.
11:30Yeah, I was.
11:31And I started to get closer, and then...
11:33But then it didn't feel as exciting.
11:35It's not very sportsmanlike.
11:37That's what I would think.
11:38I admire that.
11:39Sure, but he did violate rules 4.2A and 4.1A of golf.
11:43You're also not allowed leather trousers.
11:45No, that's fine nowadays.
11:47Oh, OK.
11:47They're cool with that.
11:48What about Last of the Summer Wives?
11:51Well, she was very keen that he filmed at Landscape.
11:54Yep.
11:54Chris.
11:55Chris.
11:56You better now?
11:57I haven't heard from him much since then.
12:03He's dead now.
12:04So, Chris did something exactly 50 minutes after the task started.
12:07He sent the video.
12:09It's not perfect.
12:10This is the video.
12:13He filmed it in time-lapse mode.
12:16We are unable to retrieve it.
12:18We have no idea if he sang the song.
12:19Presumably he did.
12:21No, but it did happen.
12:22Well, we don't know it happened.
12:24But it would be crazy to be like,
12:25yes, I'll go to a bus stop.
12:27Yes, I'll put pasta in my pockets.
12:28I'm not going to sing about antelopes.
12:30Of course he sang about antelopes.
12:31That's the easiest bit.
12:32No, the easiest bit would have been recording a video.
12:35What's that?
12:37That's the other one.
12:38OK, well, it is Kamel's time to shine.
12:43You know what?
12:44I could make time go backwards.
12:48That would be unlikely, wouldn't it?
12:51Yes.
12:52Yeah.
12:52Like, if you saw that and they're all going up,
12:55wouldn't that be weird?
12:56That would be really weird.
12:57Yeah.
12:57I mean, you can write it down.
12:59You've just got to make it happen in ten minutes.
13:02Great.
13:03OK, well, this seems very unlikely,
13:04but you've got ten minutes to make it happen.
13:06I have not thought this through.
13:08No.
13:09I hate to say it, but hurry up.
13:19I hate to say it.
13:35Was it OK?
13:43It's not an especially sophisticated response from me,
13:46but what I've written down is, what the fuck's going on?
13:52I make time move backwards.
13:55I saw you'd reversed the film so that the sand was going up.
13:59I did not reverse it. That was happening in real time.
14:02He filmed it upside down to give the illusion that...
14:05So the sand was going up, but he was upside down in the video.
14:07No, but you thought he was the right way up,
14:09because you were fooled by the illusion, remember?
14:10Oh, I think I'm the stupid one here.
14:13I think he has made time go backwards.
14:16OK, another prediction from me.
14:18During these adverts, one of your family is about to make the toilet
14:21a no-go zone again.
14:23Make them go in the garden.
14:25Bye for now.
14:33Hello. Yes, hello.
14:36Join us for the second part of the show.
14:38What was happening before the break, Alex?
14:39Well, my little Greg's Benedict,
14:41they're predicting unlikely situations
14:43to occur within 15 minutes of them opening up the task.
14:46Next, it's Joanna.
14:49That's my prediction.
14:50Would you mind reading it out to me?
14:51A donkey comes into the garden wearing a wig and costume on a skateboard.
14:57I'm doing tumble tosses on the lawn.
14:59I just heard a bell.
15:03Hey!
15:04How are you?
15:06How are you doing?
15:07I haven't seen you for so long.
15:09What?
15:10Oh, my gosh.
15:11I can sense something.
15:12I can mind read him.
15:13And he's asking if I want to go dancing.
15:15You want to dance with me?
15:19Come to me, donkey.
15:21Come to me.
15:22Woo!
15:23Oh, this is amazing.
15:25And we both dance together.
15:27And then we sit and eat chocolate.
15:29There we go.
15:30You have that there.
15:32What?
15:33That is your time up, unfortunately, Joanna.
15:35Sorry, donkey.
15:41It's just fascinating for me.
15:42There's so much detail.
15:44My feeling is that you just had that story ready in your brain.
15:47Yes!
15:48I saw the donkey.
15:50I had to work with him.
15:51He was beautiful.
15:52The fact that I could put a wig on him as well and dress him up.
15:56Then I saw, I think it was a policewoman's hat.
15:59I don't need to hear the story.
16:02Well, it was fascinating.
16:04In the context of this show and medically.
16:08Who's next?
16:09Well, finally, predictably, it is Armando.
16:13Here we go.
16:14Hello.
16:15Welcome to a Yorkshire vet.
16:17I'm Scottish.
16:18Vets are Scottish.
16:20James Herriot.
16:21And I'm going to deal with this poor little chappy here.
16:26Mackenzie Crook is his name.
16:28And he's got a thing called Shepperton.
16:30He's gone solid on the outside, but his insides are very liquified.
16:35And I think it's because there's a blockage.
16:38He ate a little wee egg two days ago.
16:41And we're going to see if we can just try and dislodge the egg.
16:44So, I've got some pellets that are full of roughage.
16:48So, one little pellet goes in.
16:52Yeah, I think we're loosening up.
16:55Second pellet.
16:57Yeah, here we go.
16:58I'll just give another wee third pellet.
17:00See if that does it.
17:02Oh!
17:04Jeez!
17:05Oh, my God!
17:07He's gone and farted out a fucking ostrich!
17:11My God!
17:12Mackenzie, you're saved.
17:14We were going to have you on Sunday, but I think we're going to be having that one.
17:20Do you mind reading me your predictions?
17:22Yeah.
17:24I predict a sheep will fart out an ostrich.
17:28LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE
17:31CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
17:35Yep.
17:36The emotional situation.
17:37I've no notes on this.
17:38This is an excellent piece of work.
17:40You're doing well today, aren't you, baguette boy?
17:42LAUGHTER
17:44Before you do the points, can I just...
17:46I've asked Chris if you'd send me a voice note of a song.
17:49It's going to mess with the scoring system, but as you wish.
17:54Please answer.
17:55I just sent you a voice note.
17:57Can you just confirm for Greg that you did...
18:00This is because I could lose points here, mate.
18:02Can I just say, I'm just thrilled you're alive.
18:05LAUGHTER
18:07This is it.
18:09Uh, uh.
18:10Can you believe that it's an antelope?
18:14It's not a cantaloupe.
18:16Oh, cos it's an antelope.
18:19Then it was, like, a rap solo for 20 minutes.
18:22Yeah.
18:23LAUGHTER
18:23Thank you, thank you very much.
18:25CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
18:29I loved all of them.
18:31I genuinely did.
18:32So I'm not giving anyone one point.
18:34I love them so much, I'm not giving anyone two points.
18:37CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
18:40I am, however, going to clump together
18:42Amy, Joel and Joanna
18:43and give them three points.
18:46Oh.
18:46Amy, Joel and Joanna, three points. OK.
18:49There must be a jump up
18:50for the sheer creativity involved in making time all that way.
18:56LAUGHTER
18:57And you know what got Armando the five points?
19:00No.
19:01It was the fact that he took some time
19:02to put moisture over the ostrich's face.
19:05LAUGHTER
19:06So, four to Camille, five to Armando.
19:07It's a bit of detail sometimes.
19:08A bit of detail.
19:11Scoreboard, please, scoreboard boy.
19:13Yes, you won't believe it.
19:14Armando's got maximum points.
19:15He's in the lead with ten.
19:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
19:19Wow.
19:21May we have another task, please?
19:23Of course.
19:24And it's team time.
19:25Oh, what's our favourite fish?
19:28Sardines!
19:42Après toi, mon frère.
19:44Ooh, thank you.
19:47Oh!
19:48Oh, no, that's sad.
19:51After you.
19:52Oh, my gosh.
19:54Wow.
19:55Oh!
19:57It's quite, er...
19:58Shall we get it out from underneath?
20:00Quite traumatic, yeah.
20:01LAUGHTER
20:06There you go.
20:07He's fine now.
20:08You know what?
20:08I think that's really going to help him.
20:11Yeah, great.
20:12Oh, no.
20:15No, I think he's fine,
20:16because he doesn't need to shake,
20:17because he's, like, in the water now,
20:18so...
20:19He's not having trouble breathing, he's...
20:22If I open this...
20:23And it says, do not wet the...
20:24And it says, keep the fish alive.
20:25Oh, keep the fish dry.
20:27All right.
20:30Win sardines.
20:32Split up and search for Alex.
20:34Ah!
20:34Oh, yes!
20:35You must not be within sight of each other while searching.
20:37Except for two of you who must hold hands at all times.
20:42Also, you must only whisper,
20:43and when you find Alex, you must stay with him and remain silent.
20:47Fastest team to all find Alex, get three sardines in the tin
20:50and shut the lid wins.
20:52Your time started when you opened the task.
20:54Right.
20:54We can't...
20:55Hang on.
20:56OK, so what do we do?
20:57Who wants to hold hands?
20:58I'd like to go with someone.
20:59I don't want to go on my own.
21:02OK.
21:03OK.
21:03Oh, no.
21:04Oh, that felt bad.
21:05Oh, good.
21:06Go for it.
21:07Go away, American boy.
21:09I'm going to start.
21:12I'm sorry.
21:13You go...
21:14You go away.
21:15Let's look for Alex.
21:15We'll look for Alex.
21:16We'll go inside.
21:18It feels so weird to hold the hand of another woman.
21:20I know.
21:20I'm so sorry to your beautiful, beautiful wife.
21:24I'm going to whisper.
21:26It's like now I'm inviting you home.
21:31Sorry, wife.
21:34LAUGHTER
21:39APPLAUSE
21:40Pretty straightforward with the team of two,
21:42but, my God, the other team had all sorts of stuff going on,
21:45didn't they?
21:46International bullying, adultery, death of animals.
21:50We'd better get stuck in and see how this plays out.
21:53Sardines.
21:54You love sardines.
21:54We play it together quite often.
21:56You made me hide.
21:58That's the end of the game.
21:59Ready?
22:01It's soddines time.
22:04Alex.
22:06Alex.
22:10Alex.
22:11Alex.
22:13Alex.
22:13Alex.
22:14Alex.
22:14Are you following the jukebox?
22:15I feel like we're searching for someone to have sex.
22:19LAUGHTER
22:24OK.
22:26It's got to be outside.
22:27It's got to be outside.
22:28Camille hasn't come in.
22:31Alex!
22:35Well, he's found him and is somewhere.
22:38Alex.
22:39It's got to be outside.
22:50It's got to be outside.
22:54It's got to be outside.
22:57It's got to be outside.
23:01It's got to be outside.
23:03It's got to be outside.
23:06It's got to be outside.
23:07It's got to be outside.
23:09It's got to be outside.
23:11How would you be prepared to be in here?
23:14I can handle it.
23:18Alex!
23:21Alex!
23:22I made this once with friends.
23:24Just a couple of years ago.
23:26And it ended in friendship.
23:30I'd like to know more about that.
23:33This is so...
23:34It feels so... Why do I feel naughty?
23:37Someone put it very seriously.
23:39One person was left, sir.
23:41They couldn't find it.
23:42They were very upset.
23:54We need one more.
23:59I've got the clock.
24:01You did it.
24:02Yeah!
24:08It didn't turn as messy as I feared at one point.
24:11I particularly feared it was going to turn messy when you said,
24:14it's like we're searching for somewhere to have sex.
24:16The next thing you did was open a pretty small spice cupboard.
24:21Do you want to talk about the friendship that was ruined
24:24last time you played this?
24:25If our friends watch it, they will know exactly what we're
24:28talking about.
24:29My wife is right there, she can corroborate.
24:31I corroborate.
24:34What a great system you guys have got.
24:38Kamel found me in five minutes, and I think, ironically,
24:40our friendship started at that point.
24:41We had a lovely chat with it, didn't we?
24:43Yeah, it was actually very nice.
24:45Yeah.
24:45I think I'm better at talking to people in the dark,
24:48not making eye contact.
24:49It's kind of ideal for me.
24:51The others took a further ten minutes to find me,
24:54so it was a total of 15 minutes and ten seconds.
24:56Oh, wow.
24:59Hey, that's it.
25:00We're halfway through.
25:01We can't stop now.
25:02He's got nothing else in his life.
25:03We'll see you in a minute.
25:13Hello there.
25:14Welcome back.
25:15It's part three.
25:16You know what that means, Alex.
25:17It means we need to complete the sardines task.
25:20Here's the team of two's attempt.
25:21It's Armando and Joanna.
25:24To fall, find Alex, get three sardines in the tin
25:26and shut the lid wins.
25:27So, basically, our first thing is find Alex.
25:29Alex, I'm the tin.
25:30You go there.
25:31I'll go and look at you.
25:32I'll go.
25:33Where is Alex?
25:35Alex, are you in here?
25:36Are you in there?
25:37Are you in there?
25:39Oh.
25:51Where are you?
25:57I'm sorry.
26:01He's not going to be in a buddy cab, but is he?
26:06Where is he?
26:11Hello?
26:15Hello?
26:16Hello, Joanna.
26:18Where do we get the sardines from?
26:21Where do we get the sardines from?
26:22Well, it's beyond the sardines.
26:24It says, put them in the tin.
26:27Beyond the tin.
26:28This is kind of tin-shaped.
26:30Okay.
26:34I know she's found him, and I'm now just spending the rest of my days wandering around.
26:49Sardines.
26:54We're having trouble with the four guinea pigs.
26:56They've all got to be neutered.
26:58Yeah.
26:58Will you do that?
26:59Yeah.
27:02Yeah, so we've got to put the guinea pigs in a pen outside.
27:05All right.
27:06Which I'm quite looking forward to.
27:07In a pen.
27:08A pen.
27:09A pen.
27:09Yeah.
27:19I've been here for seven days now.
27:21Please, someone come and find me.
27:32I don't know why that helps.
27:38Uh, hang on.
27:39What's this?
27:43Oh!
27:44Quick, get in.
27:45Because all of us have to get in.
27:46Well, do we?
27:46But we have to find...
27:47We have to find...
27:51Is that glass to shut?
27:53Is it shut?
27:53Is it shut?
27:54Yes.
27:55Everyone breathe.
27:57I've stopped the clock.
27:58We can leave it in.
28:00Thanks, Dean.
28:00You found me.
28:06You personally neuter guinea pigs in your home.
28:10I don't personally do it, but I did...
28:13I mean, my God.
28:14In the space of filming, I had four of them neutered.
28:17OK.
28:17Why can't your dad be in the same room as the guinea pigs?
28:19Oh, my God.
28:21Because of the hay.
28:22And I think he's allergic to them, and we've only just discovered it.
28:25Oh.
28:25He had to go home.
28:26He had to go back to Swansea.
28:28He had to leave.
28:29He got all...
28:29But that's not the reason why the guinea pigs were neutered?
28:31No, they were neutered.
28:33Because, um, they were getting all aggressive,
28:34and there was a whole big testosterone thing going on,
28:37and it was like, oh, my God, who's the alpha?
28:38Does the crystals not help with any of this?
28:45Why did you keep squeaking that little horn?
28:47I thought the horn might be funny,
28:49and then make wherever you are laugh spontaneously.
28:53Ah!
28:53To kind of smoke you out, in a way.
28:56I do find horns funny, I do find them funny, yeah.
28:58But I also did become unaware of the passage of time.
29:04Tell me some times, and then I'll hand out some points,
29:06then we'll move on.
29:07Team of three took 15 minutes.
29:08Joanna took three minutes 15 to find me.
29:11Yeah.
29:12Amanda took a further nine minutes.
29:14Oh!
29:15So their total was 12 minutes 15 seconds.
29:18They win the task!
29:21So it's five points to Joanna and Amanda,
29:23but how many for the team of three?
29:25Well, they were still pretty quick, weren't they?
29:26Yeah, three and a half minutes behind.
29:27Three points?
29:28Yeah.
29:29OK.
29:29Three points for the team of three.
29:31Very good.
29:32One more task, please.
29:34Yes.
29:34And, without giving too much away,
29:37boink, boink, plop.
29:52Oh!
29:53Ooh, wow!
29:55Mm.
29:55Oh, my gosh!
29:57Oh, my gosh.
29:58It's a night.
29:59It's Ollie.
30:00Ollie?
30:01Shall I?
30:02Yes.
30:02Dare I?
30:06This is so warm.
30:07That's lovely.
30:09Get a ball in the glass.
30:11You may not move the pipe or the glass.
30:15The ball must travel through the pipe
30:17and you must not do anything to influence the ball's movement
30:20after you release the ball.
30:22Fastest wins.
30:24Your time starts now.
30:26I can move this, though.
30:27Can I move this?
30:28Well, I think if you do that, the pipe might move.
30:30Yeah.
30:31Why is that there?
30:32So, I can't physically do anything to do the ball,
30:35but hitting pots and pans to make it in the thing is fine?
30:38I suppose so.
30:39Oh, yeah.
30:39That's a good idea.
30:41OK, I get it.
30:46Yeah.
30:47We're going to bank some balls off some pans.
30:49Exactly.
30:49They couldn't affect the ball after it was moving with their own bodies,
30:51but if they set something else up, the ball could be affected by that thing.
30:55Right.
30:56Let's chat no longer.
30:56Let's crack on.
30:57OK.
30:57First up, it's bouncy boy, Mr Joel Domit.
31:00Oh!
31:04Interesting.
31:06Hmm.
31:08Let's just see how it goes.
31:09This is fun.
31:10Trial and error, right?
31:17It's inconsistent, though, isn't it?
31:19No, it's exactly the same every time.
31:25Oh!
31:26Funny that I'm finding this so fun, but I could just do this in my spare time.
31:32This is so exciting.
31:37My heart is beating faster than it would usually.
31:40I mean, obviously it's...
31:44I hit the rim.
31:56Oh, I can't get any more rimmies.
32:00Oh, man.
32:01My life is full of rims.
32:03Oh!
32:06Ah!
32:09Seems to be bouncing out quite a lot.
32:10Hmm.
32:13Oh!
32:16The knight's done a little wee-wee.
32:18Who does that?
32:19Mate.
32:22This is the one.
32:23Oh!
32:24Whoa!
32:33Oh!
32:34Oh!
32:35Come on, shhh!
32:38Oh!
32:41Oh!
32:43Oh!
32:46Oh!
32:47APPLAUSE
32:50I sort of think I should start giving Joel half points
32:53every time he does a task that I think he'd be doing at home anyway.
32:58This is your area of expertise, no doubt about it.
33:02It's one of the most fun days I've had.
33:05Wow. Yeah.
33:06I don't get out much.
33:09You'd give it in 14 minutes 50 seconds. Wow.
33:11That's the standard so far. Oh, OK.
33:13Next to bounce, two people with great hair and lovely smiles.
33:16It's Amy and Camille.
33:18OK.
33:19I'm not allowed to move the pipe and I'm not allowed to move the glass.
33:23What are they for?
33:25Well, people do pasta, rice, all sorts.
33:28OK.
33:34Yeah.
33:35That's never happened to me before.
33:37New strategy.
33:40That's never happened to me before.
33:43Whoop!
33:45All right.
33:57Is there a poltergeist in here?
33:59I mean, you guys see that this is crazy, right?
34:02That's insane, isn't it?
34:05Yeah.
34:05OK.
34:10Oh, my God.
34:12It's not straight, you know?
34:13No, I know.
34:14It's like off.
34:15Is that on purpose or was that a mistake when you guys were setting up?
34:18You don't make mistakes.
34:19We don't make mistakes.
34:21What the fuck?
34:25No.
34:28Oh, can I have a thing?
34:30So I can leave.
34:35What do I want?
34:36I want, erm...
34:38What's this?
34:41Erm...
34:41A thing?
34:42Like a long sock or a tube?
34:45A long sock.
34:52As long as I don't move it once it's out of my hands, it's fine.
34:56Like, if I can hold it like this.
34:57OK.
35:04Now we're cooking!
35:07Just need to chop that up.
35:11Oh, my God.
35:15Tapey, tapey, tapey.
35:28Please.
35:31There has to be another way to do this.
35:33Other than using an enormous measuring stick.
35:36I'll be back.
35:46I'll be back.
35:46Oh, if I just keep going.
35:48They're going to go in.
35:50It's in!
35:54Oh, baby.
35:58No, same again.
36:00I didn't...
36:01I didn't know what I thought was going to happen.
36:02I think the problem is when it hits the glass, it answers it.
36:04Yeah.
36:05I think that is the problem.
36:07Yeah.
36:07Very good.
36:07Very good at this.
36:30I've stopped the clock.
36:33I'm serious.
36:35What if I'd gotten it in?
36:36Wouldn't that have been triumphant?
36:41Good.
36:42I'm actually in Hollywood that glass ball would have gone in beautifully.
36:46Not here in London, my friend.
36:47We don't have the budget.
36:50Awesome.
36:51Pretty good.
36:51Very good.
36:52Once you remembered the word tube...
36:57..the system you created, beautiful work to treat.
37:00Yes, and it looked great, too.
37:03Oh, it was really well designed.
37:05She took 22 minutes and 57 seconds.
37:08Longer than I thought.
37:10Less impressive than I thought.
37:12A nice rage starting to bubble up in you, I think.
37:15I fully came undone during that task.
37:17It felt like different parts of me were disconnecting and driving home separately.
37:23So, a lot longer than Amy's Heath Robinson creation?
37:27Yes.
37:27Can I guess?
37:28Yes, it won't make any difference.
37:3013 hours?
37:3333 minutes and 40 seconds.
37:34I mean, it's a hefty chunk of a day.
37:37Not that bad.
37:38If only you could reverse time.
37:44OK, we're pausing once again in the final part of the show.
37:48Someone will head home with a life raft,
37:51meaning that Taskmaster, a futile show on the surface,
37:54might save the life of a comedian when the ice caps melt.
37:57Fit!
38:02APPLAUSE
38:07Hello again.
38:08It's part four of the show and we're nearly there.
38:11Now it's time for the final two to try to get the ball in the glass.
38:15It's Joanna and Armana.
38:18So, I can pick out a ball.
38:20Mm-hm.
38:21But, like, how do I get it into the glass?
38:26Yeah, that will help, knowing the answer to that.
38:28I'm quite useless at once like this.
38:30I am, right?
38:31I'm useless at anything sort of spatial.
38:38Yeah, I think you're influencing that ball's movement.
38:40I think so.
38:41Thought it would be useful, but...
38:43I'm going to try.
38:45Right, what happens if I do that?
38:47I'm just going to play several.
38:48Yeah.
38:52Oh!
38:53I mean, forget the task.
38:55I just want to do this now.
38:59Why is there water?
39:02Right.
39:03I'm filling this.
39:05Because I may as well just start doing something.
39:07Sure.
39:09So, I've got this.
39:10It's a slightly jollier thing from The Handmaid's Tale.
39:16Right.
39:16Whoa.
39:18I'm so not good at anything sort of like this.
39:22Well, you never know.
39:23Anything kind of spatial.
39:26Nothing can stop you now.
39:27That's a...
39:29Well, that could.
39:30Get me in there.
39:33You know that phrase,
39:34an infinite number of monkeys?
39:36I think we're hitting that point.
39:39OK, I'm going to go for it.
39:44Right, I'm going to take a pink one.
39:46Come on.
39:47Go for it.
39:51Did it go in?
39:53I'm going to hold that there.
39:59OK, I've got it.
39:59I'm holding it down.
40:00I'm holding the glass down.
40:03Please, go on.
40:07Yes!
40:08Congratulations, Jake.
40:09You've got a ball in the glass.
40:10I've got a ball in the glass.
40:19The power stance was incredible.
40:22Show a picture of her power stance, please.
40:24Of course.
40:25Here it is.
40:27Bang!
40:27Yay!
40:29That's so good.
40:31That's so good.
40:32Why did she throw that palm to the water?
40:35You know, before I went in, right, they said to me,
40:36you're going to love this one, and I went in and I thought,
40:38oh, my God, I have no idea how you can put these things together.
40:42And so I saw there was a jug, so I thought water's involved somewhere.
40:45I'm bringing more water in.
40:46And then I thought, sod this for a laugh, I'm getting a tube.
40:53Yeah, that's what happened.
40:54That's what happened.
40:55That's what happened.
40:56Yeah, the tube was brilliant.
40:57Armando, I wrote down, this is the most fun I've seen Armando have so far.
41:01Yeah, I mean, I've had fun in all the times.
41:03I know, but I thought you were, like, inventing games within games.
41:06Again, lack of awareness of time.
41:08OK, well, we know that Kamal took 33 minutes.
41:11He gets one point for that.
41:13Amy, 22 minutes, is in fourth.
41:16Two points.
41:16Now then, Joel, you took 14 minutes and 55 seconds.
41:20Joanna, 13 minutes and 14 seconds.
41:23Ooh!
41:24So you're either first or second, Joanna.
41:28Are you first or are you second?
41:30Armando took 50 seconds and 12 minutes!
41:33He wins the title!
41:38OK, everyone, please make the way to the stage.
41:41The final task of the show!
41:48CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
41:49Wow, it's a very good team.
41:52Who will read the task out?
41:55Joel?
41:56Domit.
41:58Swing your ring onto your thing to win a ring.
42:03LAUGHTER
42:03If you win a ring, you swing again.
42:06First to win five rings wins.
42:09So, it's going to be individual battles.
42:10First up, Amy versus Kamal, because they're doing the worst in the episode.
42:14I blow my whistle, you both release your ring at the same time.
42:17Wait, what do you...
42:19LAUGHTER
42:20What do you mean?
42:22Say Amy wins, she gets a ring on her thing.
42:26On my thing!
42:27Is it based on time or number of attempts?
42:31Time.
42:31Time.
42:32What if you make time go backwards?
42:34Yeah.
42:35LAUGHTER
42:37Come on.
42:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
42:43One ring for Kamal.
42:45Ready for round two, then.
42:47Oh, my God, yes.
42:50Ooh!
42:53Ooh!
42:57Ooh!
43:01It's another ring for Kamal.
43:04Your one more ring for me starting to chant USA.
43:07LAUGHTER
43:10It still sounds threatening to me when people chant that.
43:14Next.
43:17Hey.
43:20Oh, my God.
43:21CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:25Joanna has her first ring.
43:27Amanda's first go.
43:31Oh!
43:34Ooh!
43:37Ooh!
43:38Ooh!
43:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
43:44OK.
43:46Ooh!
43:48Ooh!
43:49Ooh!
43:49Oh, Amanda.
43:51Ooh!
43:52I'm having such a good time.
43:55Yeah!
43:55Oh!
43:57Amanda strikes again.
43:59That's Amanda.
44:02He's doubled his total to two.
44:07WHISTLE BLOWS
44:10Oh!
44:11CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
44:14He got it.
44:15He got it.
44:15He got it.
44:16Oh!
44:18That was exciting.
44:19Oh!
44:26What happened to you?
44:28Oh!
44:30USA!
44:31USA!
44:32USA!
44:33The old foe's back.
44:36Wales versus USA.
44:39Oh!
44:42Oh!
44:44Oh!
44:45Oh!
44:46Oh!
44:46Oh!
44:46Oh!
44:47Oh!
44:48He's won away from victory!
44:50Oh!
44:50Oh!
44:51I don't understand.
44:51Do you have a ring on the key?
44:53I can't.
44:54Yeah, I've been playing this since I was a kid.
44:57Huge in Pakistan.
45:00Oh!
45:00Should I be chanting Pakistan?
45:01Yeah.
45:02OK.
45:04Right.
45:05This could be it.
45:06One more for Kamala and just five more for Amy.
45:07Here we go.
45:11Oh!
45:13It's all over!
45:15Pakistan!
45:19Pakistan!
45:20Pakistan!
45:21Pakistan!
45:23It's over.
45:24And I guess they should come and join me and we'll add that to the final score.
45:27We should.
45:28Well done.
45:30I'm lucky, Amy.
45:34Please!
45:37Did you enjoy watching them swing the ring on the thing?
45:39The ring's got swung onto things.
45:40I liked it.
45:41Right.
45:41So, Amy, you didn't get any on, but you get one point for coming last.
45:45Joel and Joanna, joint third with one.
45:47You get three points each.
45:49Amanda, you get four points for coming second.
45:50But the winner of the task was Kamal!
45:52Of course!
45:53Five point five rings.
45:55Which makes the scoreboard very interesting.
45:58Wow, I can't imagine what that's done to the final scoreboard.
46:01Is there one person in second place?
46:02No.
46:03Is there two?
46:04No.
46:05Are there four?
46:06No, it's three.
46:08Joanna, Joel and Kamal in joint second on 16 points,
46:11but the winner eight points above them,
46:12it's Armando Iannucci!
46:14CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
46:18Armando Iannucci wins!
46:20Please go up and wield your big things to conceal!
46:25So, what have we learnt today?
46:28Well, we've learnt...
46:29Welcome to Taskmaster.
46:31I'm Greg Davis.
46:32Butter me up, put me in the oven for three hours at 200 degrees,
46:35and you've got yourself a succulent roast
46:38that's ready to make judgement...
46:39Oh!
46:40I know what just happened.
46:42I just made time go backwards!
46:45LAUGHTER
46:48And Joel Thomas had the tattoo on his head!
46:51And, of course, Armando Iannucci wins!
46:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
47:25We'll be right back!
47:26I'll be right back!
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