- 17 hours ago
First broadcast 25th September 1978.
Robin learns that a gourmet evening has been arranged in his absence.
Richard O'Sullivan - Robin
Tessa Wyatt - Vicky
Tony Britton - James Nicholls
David Kelly - Albert
Sydney Arnold - Sidney Bacharach
Paul Angelis - Plumber
Paul McDowell - Doctor
Robin learns that a gourmet evening has been arranged in his absence.
Richard O'Sullivan - Robin
Tessa Wyatt - Vicky
Tony Britton - James Nicholls
David Kelly - Albert
Sydney Arnold - Sidney Bacharach
Paul Angelis - Plumber
Paul McDowell - Doctor
Category
📺
TVTranscript
01:31Riddle, there are four places at a table.
01:33He didn't mention those, sir.
01:36What name?
01:37Albert.
01:38His name?
01:40Mr. Albert.
01:42Oh.
01:43Oh, yes.
01:44I don't suppose you know the time.
01:47Oh, I do, sir.
01:48Yeah.
01:49Quarter to ten.
01:50Nine, four...
01:51I don't hear, sir.
01:52I got back.
01:53Hello, Dad.
01:54I don't hear, sir.
01:55I got back.
01:56Hello, Dad.
01:57So, how was Paris?
02:00Oh, it was marvellous.
02:01It was so...
02:03so...
02:04French.
02:05Yes.
02:06These are for you, madam?
02:07Oh, yeah.
02:08Oh, Albert.
02:09You shouldn't have.
02:10No, I...
02:11They're lovely.
02:12I'll get you placed with the flowers.
02:13Hello.
02:14Bonjour, mon petit chou.
02:16Jacket.
02:17That is why they call it gay Paris.
02:19Well, that's the best honeymoon I've ever had.
02:21Honeymoon?
02:22But you've been married for nearly a year.
02:23I didn't know it was going to be a honeymoon.
02:24Neither did I till I got there.
02:25Must have been that old French accordion player.
02:26He got me all romantic.
02:27Yeah, I know.
02:28What was he doing in our bedroom?
02:29Oh, Albert.
02:31Hang on.
02:32Oh, Albert.
02:33Hang on.
02:34Oh.
02:35Oh, Albert.
02:36Hang on.
02:37Oh, Albert.
02:38Hang on.
02:39Oh, Albert.
02:40Hang on.
02:41Oh, Albert.
02:42Oh, Albert.
02:43Oh, Albert.
02:44Oh, Albert.
02:45Oh, Albert.
02:46Oh, Albert.
02:47Oh, Albert.
02:48Oh, Albert.
02:49Oh, Albert.
02:50Oh, Albert.
02:51Hang on, I brought you a present.
02:53Ah, very nice, miss.
02:55It's French, eau de cologne.
02:57It's nothing like Algerian sherry.
03:00Well, Alvin, it's not for drinking.
03:02Well, neither's Algerian sherry, miss.
03:05Yes, well, Riddle, I think we would all enjoy a cup of coffee.
03:08Yes, sir, I will cook some this instant.
03:10We didn't forget you, Pat.
03:12Oh, no, no, no, we were looking at the gargoyles on Notre Dame.
03:16No, we did not forget you.
03:18Here we are. It's a book on French art.
03:20Oh, darling, how sweet are you?
03:22Actually, it's a bit, um...
03:24It's a bit dirty.
03:29Oh, well, as long as it's artistic.
03:32Now I've dropped it in a puddle.
03:39How's your week been?
03:40Oh, very busy, darling.
03:41The moment you left, I turned the restaurant notice to closed.
03:45Now I'm just about to turn it back to open.
03:46It's been engulfed, isn't it?
03:47Yes, it certainly.
03:48And I've been making a lot of reservations for this evening.
03:51Tonight?
03:52Funny.
03:53Monday night, you can usually hear a pin drop.
03:55Or a plate.
03:57Well, there are the bookings.
03:59Can't understand it.
04:00Oh, no, it's just terrible writing, isn't it?
04:02The kitchen is that way.
04:04Oh, sir, votre bicyclette.
04:06Okay, Albert, forget the coffee, we...
04:12Oh, I see, you've already forgot the coffee, right.
04:14Listen, come on, let's get going, because we're going to have a busy night tonight.
04:17No, I thought as much.
04:18That phone's been going like a bee in a china shop.
04:21Or a bull in a... in a bonnet.
04:23Exactly.
04:24It'll be these leaflets I've been shoving through people's doors for themself.
04:28Well...
04:29Hang on.
04:29Special gourmet evening, Robin's Nest, for one night only, live music, chef flown direct
04:41from Paris.
04:42What's he...
04:43There was a man in the Place Duterte, and he tore this newspaper up into fantastic patterns.
04:49Oh, really?
04:49Yes, yes.
04:50Vicky?
04:51Yeah?
04:51Vicky, why do you think we're going to be so full this evening?
04:55Because there's a lot of people coming.
04:56Not bad, not bad, not bad.
04:58Daddy-in-law?
05:00Ah, well, why do lemmings suddenly rush for the sea?
05:03Well, it's not because they have leaflets thrown at them through their nest saying,
05:06tonight is suicide night, folks.
05:08Ah, those, yes.
05:10Well, they might have something to do with it.
05:11Might?
05:12Look, I'm only trying to make up for the fact that this place has been closed for a whole week.
05:15That's not a bad idea.
05:17Yes, I...
05:18I know, but it's not true.
05:20All right, I'm the chef.
05:22But, you see, it says here, I come from Paris.
05:24Yes, I come from Southampton.
05:27Yeah, but you were flown from Paris.
05:29It'd be a lie to say a chef flown direct from Southampton.
05:33Listen, live music.
05:35Ah, yes, well, that is my department.
05:37Oh, it's not you singing, is it, Dad?
05:38No, I'm afraid not, darling.
05:39You're going to play the spoons.
05:43Now, this will surprise you.
05:47Live music.
05:48But you can't play the piano.
05:50I am not going to play it, darling.
05:51Well, that's bound to draw them in.
05:54Well, it sounds in tune, doesn't it?
05:59Can you play the piano?
06:01Eh?
06:01Well, I don't know.
06:02I've never tried.
06:02Hey, I can!
06:17Excuse me, sir, the band is at the back door.
06:25Will I show them in?
06:26Yes, please do, Riddle.
06:28Uh, Dad, where did you find it?
06:29Oh, it was advertised in the local newsagent's window.
06:31You know, one of those little cards.
06:33Ah, yeah, Fuzzy, you've been looking into those little windows, have you?
06:36Hello, hello.
06:38For a piano.
06:39But, of course.
06:42Cottage upright for sale.
06:45Suit-tired businessman.
06:46Mr. Bacharach, sir.
06:50Ah.
06:53Sidney Bacharach.
06:56Good morning.
06:58Good morning, Mr. Bacharach.
07:00Shall I take it?
07:02This is my daughter, Victoria.
07:04And this is her husband.
07:06How do you do?
07:07Hello.
07:08Mr. Bacharach is going to play the piano 40 for us this evening.
07:10Oh, that's nice.
07:12Where do you usually play?
07:13At home.
07:14But, unfortunately, a neighbour complained anonymously about the noise.
07:18And Mr. Nicholls very kindly suggested I play here.
07:22And, oh, he isn't going to charge me.
07:25Ah.
07:26Well, he's like that.
07:27Where, actually, do you live?
07:29Above Mr. Nicholls.
07:30Ah, yes.
07:31Yes.
07:32Mr. Bacharach has a very wide repertoire, as I'm sure you'll hear at the moment.
07:38Sir, er, er, Mr. Bacharach, before you start, er, not too much of the Jerry Lee Lewis stuff.
07:47You know, my, the piano won't take it, you know.
07:49See, just like this, all laid back on it a bit, you know.
07:51Oh, yeah.
07:52Right.
07:53All right.
08:02All right.
08:07All right.
08:10Okay.
08:18in this room they really will go right down the end of the road
08:27that was really ace but you know do you think you can do something with a little bit more
08:37sort of atmosphere you know maybe something a little bit more french oh yes certainly
08:48ever been abroad albert yeah only the one sir a day trip to dover
09:18from cali eh no from folkston a bit of a mix up with the tickets
09:23ah yes me uncle james was the great one for the going abroad he always used to say show me a man
09:31who travels and i'll show you a man who isn't there
09:35he's intolerable no he's in canada now
09:40i'm sure we're full already he's still taking bookings oh he's not is he
09:46no i'm afraid not sir we haven't a table free before nine
09:59that'll be all right oh good and may we expect your charming wife as well
10:04oh and your daughters oh good i shall be so pleased to see you all
10:07yes nine o'clock thank you so much
10:09that's table three at nine o'clock
10:14no no just just a minute you've got table three
10:16booked here for eight o'clock
10:18yes right so how do you know that the people who are eating at eight will leave by nine
10:22they'll have to when the people at nine sit down
10:25oh i mean an hour is not long enough for a three-course meal
10:31it is if they cut out the chat between mouthfuls
10:33they're paying for the privilege of eating not yapping
10:36that's all you think about isn't it it's money
10:39well why not i mean think of it 50 people at two sittings right
10:43say at uh five pounds a head that is 250 pounds
10:48so if i get rid of people on table four by 10 15 we can have a third sitting
10:53now you're thinking my way you'd really let me do that wouldn't you
10:57excuse me sir yes i have a confession to make
11:01what is it my son
11:03does it involve dirty agnes
11:08i broke this but only in the middle
11:13what is it
11:14it's the key for unjamming the waste disposal
11:18the key that's all right we can all get
11:19the waste disposal's jammed
11:22a bit but at least we found out where the missing potato peeler got her
11:26oh well that
11:28i think we'll have to call for a plumber
11:31oh there's no need for that darling an idiot could fix it
11:33oh well done your dad just volunteered
11:35no we've got a plumber here that does a 24-hour service
11:39yes that's how long it takes them to do the job
11:41and they'll charge the earth
11:43oh right i'll have a go
11:44oh here's the toolbox sir
11:46he's of knotted string
11:56a hammer
11:57decisions
11:59all right albert
12:08pass me the other part of the key
12:10the key thank you
12:11right just a minute
12:18if i
12:19that should go in there right
12:21now if i twist
12:23uh albert
12:24hammer albert
12:25hammer
12:26oh i'm sorry i'm sorry i'm sorry i've got to kiss me so
12:31you'll probably miss
12:33i do hope there's not too much damage
12:38damned expensive you know
12:40these waste disposals
12:42come in come in
12:47sit you down
12:53oh
12:59i haven't seen you since uh
13:02hepatitis was it
13:04no it was easter actually
13:05how are you vicky
13:11fine
13:13and you
13:14oh i'm fine
13:16how are you
13:23fine
13:26so it's a social call is it
13:30well you see
13:33uh are you still living in a um
13:35in a um
13:37oh no no we're married now
13:39horrester's walk
13:42oh
13:42yes yes
13:43how's your father
13:44uh still the same
13:46oh dear
13:47still it's too late to expect a change in him
13:51what can i do for you
13:53oh it's not me actually
13:55it's my husband
13:56ah
13:56yes you see
13:58i like you calling on my husband
14:02sorry
14:08well
14:08oh sorry sorry
14:08what i was trying to say
14:10you see
14:10how can i put it
14:12um
14:12well my waste disposal is blocked
14:18i see
14:25i wanted to get a plumber
14:27well he's much better off seeing a doctor
14:30have you taken anything
14:33oh no
14:37i'm not blocked
14:38sorry
14:38no it's my sink
14:41the sink is blocked
14:42well you can't have your plumbing done in the national health i'm afraid
14:46you have to go private
14:48you see
14:49while he was trying to fix it
14:51he got hit on the hand
14:53oh
14:54better have a look at it
14:56nothing broken
15:09just badly bruised
15:11he'll need to be in a sling for a few days
15:13yes
15:24you phone for a plumber
15:25yes
15:26just a moment
15:27have you any means of identification
15:30what do you want to see
15:32a couple of washes or a ballcock
15:34the tradesman's entrance
15:41is the next muse on the right
15:43well any breakages yet
15:52none at all sir
15:53oh good
15:54how many of you polished so far
15:56when i finish this fellow it'll be one
15:58well you better open the back door for the plumber if you will
16:03i didn't hear him knocking
16:05he is now
16:07god that's incredible
16:10i don't see why
16:13he knew before he did it
16:14i had a cousin once who was psychic in reverse
16:18she knew things had taken place
16:20just after it happened
16:22really
16:25yes
16:26well you'd better open the door before he knocks again
16:29why the mind boggles
16:32will you tell him to wipe his feet
16:36oh it's all right sir he's wearing shoes
16:38the sink is there
16:43oh yes so it is
16:45thank you very much governor
16:47i'm gonna waste a lot of valuable time looking for that
16:49oh
16:52well
16:54there are some things i've got to learn to do with my left hand instead of getting you to do them
16:58like what
16:59like getting money out of my pocket honestly that taxi driver he was very embarrassed
17:03well i can't help it if you're ticklish
17:05here's your change
17:08oh thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you thank you
17:14leave my daughter alone
17:16good heavens where's your arm
17:21well the doctor was so busy i left it in reception
17:24but you can't possibly use it with it all strapped up like that
17:28no he's been told not to for at least two days
17:31oh dear oh what a shame
17:33well as we're going to be very busy tonight
17:35don't you think you better make the two days tomorrow and wednesday
17:37oh yeah
17:40yeah i think i've got it now
17:42yeah will i turn it on
17:43no
17:44i'd rather you didn't
17:46is that what happened to you
17:49how do you mean
17:55let it go
17:57oh yeah here it is
17:59last bit
18:00well it'll come in handy for eating soup around corners
18:04yeah
18:07perfect
18:08if you think i'm dropping any more solid objects down it sir
18:22do it now while i'm here eh
18:23i hope you're not going to charge me for gossiping to the staff
18:27i finished work five minutes ago squire
18:31you think yourself look i'm not going to charge you extra
18:33for holding up payment
18:34all right all right all right don't be childish
18:36that'll cost you uh
18:38ten pounds seventy
18:40please
18:41ten pounds seventy
18:44all right all right i'll pay it
18:46no no no i'll do it
18:48oh thank you
18:50i'll get it
18:58i'll talk you on in in
18:59house
18:59can i get small chips
19:05now then
19:11five
19:14ten
19:15how much for cash
19:17ten pounds seventy
19:18ten pounds fifty
19:21sixty
19:22seventy
19:23thank you
19:26miss nichols
19:28oh miss nichols
19:34that does of course include w-a-t
19:40w-a-t
19:42with a tip
19:43afternoon
19:43right well you better start cooking
19:47i can't look i've got the use of my right hand
19:50then use your left
19:52i can't cook single-handed
19:54well you usually do you're always bragging about it
19:56i usually cook single-handed with both hands
19:59wait a minute wait a minute
20:00do you realize we've got fifty
20:02fifty reservations tonight
20:03if you're so keen to keep the place open
20:08why don't you cook it
20:09i can't
20:10all my training has been devoted to eating
20:12victorian
20:13surely i mean after all these years you've spent with with
20:16with him
20:17you must have learned something
20:18well no not really
20:20because you see with all the dashing in and out
20:21i only get to learn bits of recipes
20:23i could do you a sauce ta-ta with duck stuffing and chocolate mousse
20:26excuse me
20:29i could rustle up some bacon sandwiches
20:31if somebody caught the bread
20:32and separated the bacon
20:34and spread the butter
20:35thank you very much
20:37that's a very nice thought
20:38nicer than thickest
20:39come on what are we going to do
20:41well i don't know
20:42i suppose we could offer them a discount
20:45in view of the fact there will be no food
20:46we'll have to cancel
20:49i hope i'm not too early
20:50but i thought you'd like to discuss my program
20:53can i canoe you up the river
20:55i think we're already up it
20:56mr. Bacharach
20:59i'm very sorry
21:00but i'm afraid we shan't be needing you tonight after all
21:02oh i see
21:04yes
21:04i wasn't going to play like jerry lewis
21:07no it's not that mr. Bacharach
21:09it's just the fact that
21:10you see i've hurt my hand
21:11i can't cook
21:12so we've got to cancel
21:13oh i am sorry
21:15yes
21:16well
21:17i i i'll toddle off
21:19oh before i go
21:20would you mind giving me a tip
21:22oh my god
21:24they're all the same
21:25when you're doing langoust souffle
21:28how do you prevent your
21:29bechamel sauce from
21:31curdling
21:31mine always does
21:33all right so it's very simple you see
21:34you mix
21:36do you cook
21:38oh yes
21:39before i retired
21:40i was head chef at maxim's
21:42in paris
21:43east grinstead
21:45that's close enough
21:46can you cook please
21:49oh yes
21:49provided there's no bechamel sauce
21:51well listen
21:52could you
21:53could you help us
21:53out tonight
21:54please
21:55would you cook for us tonight
21:56oh yes
21:57please
21:58here we are dad
22:14more dirty dishes
22:15oh goody
22:16new court on
22:18bleu table
22:19right
22:20oh that looks delicious
22:21yes
22:22at least nobody will complain
22:23about the food
22:24how much would you charge
22:25to say on
22:26oh dad
22:27music's not that bad
22:28either
22:28music's not that bad
22:29music's not that bad
22:30music's not that bad
22:31music's not that bad
22:32music's not that bad
22:33music's not that bad
22:34music's not that bad
22:35music's not that bad
22:36music's not that bad
22:37music's not that bad
22:38music's not that bad
22:39music's not that bad
22:40music's not that bad
22:41music's not that bad
22:42music's not that bad
22:43music's not that bad
22:44music's not that bad
22:45music's not that bad
22:46music's not that bad
22:47music's not that bad
22:48music's not that bad
22:49music's not that bad
22:50music's not that bad
22:51music's not that bad
22:52music's not that bad
22:53music's not that bad
22:54music's not that bad
22:55music's not that bad
22:56music's not that bad
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