- 1 day ago
First broadcast 27th December 1979.
Robin tires of constant singing as he attempts to put up the decorations.
Richard O'Sullivan - Robin
Tessa Wyatt - Vicky
Tony Britton - James Nicholls
David Kelly - Albert
Peggy Aitchison - Gertrude
Robin tires of constant singing as he attempts to put up the decorations.
Richard O'Sullivan - Robin
Tessa Wyatt - Vicky
Tony Britton - James Nicholls
David Kelly - Albert
Peggy Aitchison - Gertrude
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:27To be continued...
00:38Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
00:42Oh, what fun it is to decorate the restaurant today
00:46Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
00:52We are doing up Robbins' nest just for Christmas Day
00:56Albert, Albert, can you pass me the sticky tape, please?
00:59Oh, certainly, Mr Tripp
01:04Albert
01:04I'm sorry, Mr Tripp, sorry
01:07Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:11Mr Tripp is decorating Robbins' nest today
01:15Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:24Albert, you're a menace
01:25I'm sorry, Mr Tripp, sorry
01:27Look, will you just stand in the middle, please, and do not move?
01:30Right
01:31Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
01:36I am helping Mr Tripp to decorate today
01:39Oh, isn't this fun, Mr Tripp?
01:42Oh, yeah, it's terrific, Albert
01:43It looks lovely, you should keep it like this all the year round
01:46Right, now, we'll get this bit up for the second time
01:51Right, Albert, don't move, don't move, Albert
01:54Right, now, all I've got to do is submit in the middle
01:58And we're there
02:00So if you just pass me...
02:02Hi, it's Mrs Tripp
02:03Albert, if you could pass me the paper chain
02:06Maybe you could use something stronger
02:09Yes, I have a large Scotch, Albert
02:12Oh, thanks, Albert
02:15Oh, it looks lovely
02:17What a terrific job, Bert, have you?
02:19Thanks, Mrs Tripp
02:20Well, Mr Tripp did most of it
02:22I just helped
02:25Look what I got made up in the market
02:26Ah, that's a nice read
02:28No, it's not a wreath, Albert
02:30It needs to go on the front door
02:31I wouldn't put it there
02:33It'll only get stolen
02:34Oh, Robin
02:36Do you think if I put this on the front door
02:38It'll get pinched?
02:39Huh? Don't be so silly, Vicky
02:41No one's going to pinch that from the front door
02:44It's Christmas
02:45It's a time of season with goodwill to all men
02:48Shut up, Albert!
02:51Vicky, you sing if you want to, Albert
02:53Thank you, Mrs Tripp
02:55Oh, jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way
02:59Vicky, Vicky, I've had jingle bells for the last two hours
03:01I'm up to hearing jingle bells
03:02I'm sick to death of jingle bells
03:04I have got jingle bells coming out of my...
03:05Robin!
03:06You have just said it's the season of goodwill to all men
03:09Well, that doesn't include, Albert
03:10Oh, come on
03:11It's Christmas
03:12A time for giving
03:13Oh, you turn to give me a bit of heat
03:16Oh, jingle bells
03:19Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer
03:23Hand your bet
03:24Careful, Robert
03:25You'll snap the top off
03:27Well, stop pulling it, then
03:29Ah, Mr Tripp
03:32Can I give you a hand?
03:34No, thank you, Albert
03:38Do you think, do you think, do you think all this is worth it?
03:41Of course it's worth it, it's fun, it's Christmas
03:43What are we going to do with it now?
03:45Well, what are we going to do with it now?
03:48We're going to decorate it, that's what we're going to do with it, bird brain
03:51Well, why don't we get an artificial one?
03:53Then we won't get all these pine needles stuck everywhere
03:55No, it's not the same
03:57Besides, I like the smell of pine needles
04:00Don't be such a misery
04:01Isn't it a lovely tree, Albert?
04:03It is, Mrs Tripp, it is
04:05Oh, Christmas tree
04:08Oh, Christmas tree
04:10Albert, Albert
04:14Albert, will you promise me that you will stop singing after Christmas?
04:18Will you stop going on at him, please?
04:20At least he's trying to get into the Christmas spirit
04:22Which is more than I can say for some people
04:24Oh, now, today, Christmas is such a great big con, isn't it?
04:27I mean, shopping, buying presents
04:30Lugging Christmas trees all over the place
04:32Sending people Christmas cards you don't really want to send Christmas cards to
04:35I mean, no, Christmas should be like the Olympics once every four years
04:39Don't take any notice of old Scrooge
04:41Oh, I never do, Mrs Tripp
04:43That's very true, Albert
04:44Oh, beat the way
04:45While you were loose, Mr Nicholls rang
04:47Oh, any message?
04:48Yeah, he's coming over with a Christmas tree
04:53Albert, Albert
04:54This may sound a silly question
04:57But why didn't you tell Mr Nicholls that we were out buying a Christmas tree?
05:02Well, he didn't ask
05:04That was a silly question
05:06Well, never mind, it's the thought that comes
05:08Yeah
05:08He said you can pay him for it when he gets here
05:12Hello
05:13In here, Dad
05:16Well, I must say the restaurant looks splendid
05:19Albert and Robin did it
05:20Oh, really?
05:21Well, it's very, very festive, very seasonal
05:24Very expensive
05:25£18.50
05:26There you are, you see, you've gone and overdone it again
05:29Take half of it down and go and sell it back to the shop
05:31And why didn't you tell me you were bringing a Christmas tree?
05:33Because nobody told us that you were buying a Christmas tree
05:36Anyway, where is yours? In the car, I suppose
05:37No, it's here
05:44Miss Nicholls, what do you call that?
05:47A Christmas tree
05:49They're jolly good, these
05:50They last forever, you know
05:51Yes, they grow them in Hong Kong, I believe
05:56You can use them year after year
05:58It's an investment
05:59And you don't have to water it
06:01Of course
06:02You don't have to water it, Riddle
06:04It's artificial
06:05Mr. Nicholls, really
06:07I mean, really
06:07An artificial Christmas tree
06:09It's not on, you know
06:10Not compared to the real thing
06:12Well, at least you don't get pie needles everywhere
06:15Exactly so, Victoria
06:17There
06:19Oh, Christmas tree
06:21Oh, Chris
06:24Albert, will you continue to fold the nutkins, please?
06:28Of course, Mr. Tripp
06:29Thank you very much
06:30Excuse me
06:31Now, apart from bringing the Christmas tree around
06:34Oh, by the way, you owe me £4.39p
06:36Oh, fine
06:37I also came to discuss our Yuletide arrangements
06:40On what?
06:41Well, we've got to work out when we're going to open and close the restaurant over the Christmas period
06:44Yes, well, I've already decided when we're closing it
06:47There are a number of factors to be taken into account
06:50Viability, overtime, exhaustion
06:52Mr. Nicholls, I have decided our arrangements for Christmas
06:55Now, what I thought
06:56As the senior partner of this failing venture, Tripp
07:00I feel very strongly
07:02That the discussion of the Christmas period is company policy
07:07And is therefore open to mutual consultation and discussion
07:12Now, what I've decided is this
07:14You will open on the 24th as usual
07:16Although perhaps last orders might be taken a little later as it's Christmas Eve
07:20Actually, if I stayed open really late
07:22I could catch them coming back from church
07:24You know, sort of midnight mass
07:27Yes, very good idea
07:29But of course, on Christmas Day, you will open only for lunch
07:31Oh, are you sure about that?
07:34Well, it's up to you, of course
07:35But I don't think you should work too hard over Christmas
07:37What do you think, Victoria?
07:38Dad
07:38Well, actually, I thought for Christmas night I could do a set meal
07:41Simple but seasonal flavour
07:44For instance, I could start off with my Christmas special
07:47Which is homemade broth with a sprig of holly stuck in the middle
07:52And then I thought perhaps we could have fried
07:55Deep-fried, even, reindeer
07:57Swaddled in batter
07:59Accommoded by three roast potatoes signifying the three wise men
08:02And a single leak representing the yuletide log
08:05He's only joking, Dad
08:07And then for pudding
08:08Christmas pudding, I am trying to have a serious business discussion
08:12Mr. Nicholls, no way are we staying open on Christmas Day
08:16We are closing on Christmas Eve
08:18And we are not opening until the evening of the 27th
08:22And the only reason we are opening on the evening of the 27th
08:25Is that Albert Riddle took a birthday party booking without notifying me first
08:29Dad, how could you expect Robin to work on Christmas Day?
08:33Honestly, I think that's really mean
08:36Well, it was only for lunch
08:38And I didn't expect him to work on Boxing Day
08:40Oh, and a Merry Christmas to you, too
08:43Really, Dad?
08:44Oh, yes, yes, yes
08:45You're quite right
08:46You're absolutely right
08:47And I'm sorry
08:47I'm really sorry
08:50Just the same
08:50It shows that there ought to be more consultation between us
08:52Mr. Nicholls, shall I tell you why we didn't consult you?
08:54Why?
08:55Because we knew that you'd suggest we open on Christmas Day
08:57All right, all right, all right
08:58Point taken
08:59I am sorry
09:00Really sorry
09:01And just to show you that I mean what I say
09:03I should like you both to come over and spend Christmas Day with me
09:07I'll cook the Christmas lunch
09:09How much for a head?
09:15I am trying
09:17We will have a lovely day together, just the three of us
09:20Yes, Dad, that would be soup
09:21Thank you, darling
09:22Oh, Albert, could you go finish folding the napkin?
09:26Yeah, I was just going to do that, Mrs. Thribb
09:29Great minds think alike
09:32Dad
09:32Yes, darling
09:33Don't you think we ought to invite Albert as well?
09:36What?
09:37Invite Riddle?
09:38To my flat
09:39Well, it is Christmas and he'll be all on his own
09:42Absolutely, out of the question
09:43He is staff
09:44Well, so am I
09:46There are certain rules, certain guidelines which one must observe
09:50One does not invite a ranker into the officer's mess
09:53Not even on Christmas Day
09:54Oh, I see, I'm an officer now, am I?
09:59Non-commissioned
10:00Dad, I really think we ought to invite him
10:03Mr. Thribb
10:04Yes
10:04I've been thinking
10:05This soup you're making with the holly in the middle
10:09Won't it get stuck in people's throats?
10:15Oh, two bold days off
10:18I can't believe it
10:20I thought those people on table four were never going to leave
10:22I don't like to think of Albert on his own on Christmas Day
10:25I hope he'll be all right
10:27All right?
10:28He'll be all right, all right
10:30You know, I told you an uncle of his died a few weeks back
10:33Second cousin, not very close
10:34Well, he was close enough to leave him a bit of money
10:37Really?
10:38How much?
10:39Well, he didn't say, he just said a bit of money
10:41Well, a bit could be a lot, or it could be a bit
10:43Yes, well, that depends whether it's a big bit or a little bit
10:47Whatever it is, it'd be a nice Christmas present for Albert
10:49Mmm
10:53What are you doing?
10:54I'm working out who didn't send us a Christmas card this year
10:57So that we don't have to send them one next year
11:00Guess how many people are thinking the same thing
11:02Because we didn't send them a card this year
11:04Well, that's because they didn't send us one last year
11:07So by 1990, nobody will send anybody any Christmas cards
11:11And we'll all be struck off each other's list
11:13That's very good thinking, Mrs. Cage
11:18Merry Christmas
11:19Merry Christmas
11:24What time is your father expecting us tomorrow?
11:26About one o'clock
11:27Great, I'll get up at five, too
11:31Hey, did you remember to leave the biscuits and milk out for Santa?
11:36Do you remember doing that when you were little?
11:38Mmm
11:40Robin
11:41Hmm
11:44We ought to think about starting a family
11:47Yes, well, give us a couple of days rest and we'll talk about it
11:51Night
11:53Hey, Vicky
11:54Uh-huh
11:56Fancy somebody pinching our holly wreath from the front door, eh?
12:01Amazing
12:02Amazing
12:03Amazing
12:03Amazing
12:08When earth can that be at this time of night?
12:10Father Christmas
12:10Well, you can push off
12:14Oh, go on
12:14You'll have to go and see who it is
12:16Oh, but I'm on holiday
12:19The whole nation's supposed to be on holiday
12:21We should all be asleep
12:24All right
12:25All right
12:29All right, all right
12:30I'm coming
12:31All right
12:43Merry Christmas, Mr. Tripp
12:47Albert
12:47I was in bed
12:49I'm sorry, Mr. Tripp
12:50I'm sorry to disturb you
12:52It's just that, well
12:53I forgot to give you this
12:54But Albert
12:55It's one o'clock in the morning
12:56You've got to shout it through the letterbox
13:00Oh, well
13:02You didn't have to come all the way back just for this, Albert
13:06Come in
13:07Oh, then, who is it?
13:09Albert
13:10Is everything all right?
13:11Yes, he came back to give us this
13:14But Albert, it's one o'clock in the morning
13:16You could have shoved it through the letterbox
13:18Oh
13:19Vicky
13:20Come on, Vicky
13:21Come on now
13:22It's Christmas
13:23Huh?
13:24He came back to give us this personally
13:26Yeah, well, I felt it was important
13:27To give it to you personally
13:29Of course you did, Albert
13:30And listen
13:30While you're here
13:31You're not going to refuse a little Christmas drink
13:33I know
13:34I don't want to keep you from your bed
13:35Not at all, not at all
13:36Come on
13:37A little Christmas drink with me and Vicky
13:39Well
13:41Of course you will
13:42Now, listen
13:43Albert, what do you want?
13:44Gin?
13:44Scotch?
13:45Brandy?
13:45Lovely
13:48Which one, Albert?
13:50Oh
13:50Oh, well, I just have a small large scotch
13:55I'll get it, darling
13:55Right
13:56Sit down, sit down
13:57Well, I say
13:57You've already had a nice Christmas
13:59With that little windfall, eh?
14:01Very nice
14:01Very nice indeed, Mr. Tripp
14:03I still can't believe it
14:05Yeah
14:05There we are, Albert
14:06Say when
14:07No, Vicky, Vicky
14:08Come on
14:09Come on
14:09It's Christmas
14:10Just pour it
14:11When?
14:13What?
14:17Dear Mr. Tripp
14:19Due to the fortunate death of my second cousin on my auntie's side
14:23I have been able to buy a little business
14:26I have been able to buy a little business
14:27So I will not be coming back after Christmas
14:29Hoping this leaves me as it finds you, Albert Riddle
14:34P.S. Merry Christmas
14:37Albert, don't you dare touch that scotch
14:42Are you ready, merry, gentle man?
14:45Let nothing you dismay
14:47All right, Gertrude, you can come out of that kitchen now
14:50You've done quite enough for me
14:51I'm just basting the turkey
14:53Oh, good, good, good
14:55Well done
15:01Everything's under control, Mr. Nichols
15:03All you've got to remember is to baste the turkey
15:07Now, you are very kind, Gertrude
15:08You know, being a daily help doesn't mean you have to come in on Christmas Day as well
15:11When I promise to do something, Mr. Nichols, I do it
15:14Besides, I like to get a break from my family
15:18Oh, that looks beautiful, Mr. Nichols
15:22Oh, do you think so, Gertrude?
15:23Well, I wanted to make it really special for my daughter
15:26Of course you do, Mr. Nichols
15:28Looks lovely
15:30Mr. Nichols
15:31Yes, yes
15:33Do you realise where we're standing?
15:36Hmm?
15:37Er, what do you mean?
15:39Under the mistletoe
15:45Yes, er, so
15:46So we are
15:58Merry Christmas, Mr. Nichols
16:00Thank you, Gertrude
16:01And a Merry Christmas to you, too
16:03What about a Christmas drink?
16:04Oh, I ought to be going
16:06What have you got?
16:07Well, what would you like?
16:08A glass of port?
16:09Oh, no, not port
16:10No?
16:11Do you know, Mr. Nichols
16:12Just a drop of port gives me the most terrible wind
16:18Well, we don't want that, do we?
16:21What about some sherry?
16:23Just a small one
16:24All right, there we are
16:27Oh, that'll be my daughter
16:28Do excuse me
16:36Merry Christmas
16:37Merry Christmas, Dad
16:38Oh, darling, thank you very much
16:41A Merry Christmas
16:46What's the matter with you?
16:47Oh, something happened last night
16:49I'll tell you about it later
16:50Nothing to worry about
16:51What do you mean, nothing to worry about?
16:52You've got me worried now
16:58Oh
16:58Oh
16:59Er, Gertrude
17:00You remember my daughter, Victoria?
17:02Oh, yes, of course
17:04I haven't seen you for ages
17:06How are you, Miss Nichols?
17:08Oh, I'm fine, thank you
17:09Er, I'm Mrs. Nichols
17:11Of course you are
17:13He says sherry
17:14Makes me all woozy
17:17That's your fault, you naughty boy
17:24Who did you marry, then?
17:26Er, him
17:28Oh
17:30Oh, well
17:33Yes, Gertrude, you, er
17:35You remember my son-in-law, er, er, Trip
17:37Hello, Gertrude
17:38Hello, Trip
17:41What happened to that nice-looking boy that you used to go round with?
17:45The one that was keen on cookery and wanted to start his own restaurant
17:49Well, this is him
17:51Oh, no, no
17:53Good-looking boy
17:56Nice smile, very polite
17:58Er, Ronald, I think his name was
18:03Robin
18:05Robin, that's it
18:06Oh, nice boy
18:08Whatever happened to him?
18:10No, no, no, Gertrude
18:11See, that, that is me, you see?
18:13That is me
18:13See, and Miss Nichols now
18:15Is my husband
18:16I mean
18:18I'm her wife
18:19I mean
18:19What I mean is that
18:20She's a Trip
18:21I'm a Trip
18:22You see?
18:22And it's Mr. and Mrs. Trip
18:25Oh
18:27Oh, yes
18:28Yes, isn't he
18:29I eat
18:31Oh, yes, uh, Gertrude, did you say that your sister was waiting for you?
18:36Oh, yes
18:36I mustn't keep her, must we?
18:38Come along, dear
18:39I'll see you out
18:40That's right
18:40There's your bag
18:41I mean, you get good
18:42That's right
18:42Yes
18:42Robin
18:43There you are, yes
18:44Robin
18:45Robin
18:46Robin
18:48Listen
18:49Don't say anything to Dad about Albert leaving, all right?
18:53We just have a nice Christmas lunch
18:54He's obviously gone to a lot of trouble
18:56All right, all right
18:58Now, then
18:59Guess who else is coming to Christmas lunch?
19:03Happy Christmas, everybody
19:06Is that a nice surprise?
19:08Very nice
19:13Well, uh, who'd like a drink?
19:21You're not having this one, will you?
19:23I'm going to have this one
19:24Now, then
19:25Let's see
19:27What marvels of literature
19:28Yeah
19:31Now, then
19:31Who shall we test with this one?
19:33Ah, but all this one's for you
19:34Now, listen
19:35What has four legs and barks?
19:40A dog
19:41Oh, yes
19:45I don't get that
19:49Oh, well, let's see
19:53That's the last of the crackers, I'm afraid
19:54Jolly good
19:55Robin
19:55Jolly good
19:56Jolly good crackers
19:57Jolly witty
19:58Jolly
19:58Well, Mr. Nickles
19:59Let me clear these things away, huh?
20:02No, no, no
20:02Not at all, Riddle
20:03You're on holiday
20:03I shall do it later
20:04You shall let me help
20:05You know what they say
20:06Many hands make light work
20:09I will not hear of you, Riddle
20:11Now, you stay right where you are
20:12Well
20:15That was certainly
20:16A most wonderful meal, Mr. Nickles
20:19Thank you, Riddle
20:22Albert
20:24Albert
20:24Albert
20:27The turkey was a bit dry for my liking
20:30But I like the jam on it
20:34Cranberry sauce, Albert
20:35No thanks
20:42Yes, well, what about a game of charades?
20:45Oh, count me out, Mr. Nickles
20:47I'm no good at card games
20:48Oh, no, no, no, no
20:49It's not a card
20:50No, no, no
20:51It's more of a sort of miming
20:52You know, theatre
20:55Film
20:55And television
20:56I like on the box
20:58With that nice Mike Laspick
21:01Actually, leave me out
21:02So I don't fancy playing charades
21:03Just leave me out, will you, please?
21:06Oh, come on, Robin
21:07Let's play
21:07It'd be fun
21:09No, no, no
21:10You carry on without me
21:12Don't let me spoil the party
21:13You are already spoiling the party
21:15You've been in a foul mood
21:16Ever since you got here
21:17Now, what on earth is the matter?
21:18Oh, Dad
21:19Let's change the subject, shall we?
21:21Charades
21:21Right
21:22Now, theatre
21:24Five words
21:24First word
21:25I'll tell you what's the matter
21:26Robin!
21:27You know, Albert's come into a little bit of money
21:30So he is therefore deciding to leave us
21:33Oh, really?
21:34Yeah, that's right, Mr. Nichols
21:36I've come into a bit of money
21:37And I'm going to start me own business
21:39Well, what sort of business?
21:41That's my business
21:44Well, you can't hold a good man back
21:46If Albert wants to leave, then Albert must leave
21:49When is Albert leaving?
21:50Well, let's put it this way, Mr. Nichols
21:52When we reopen after Christmas
21:54For that birthday party booking
21:56That Albert so kindly put me into
21:58We ain't got no staff
21:59What?
22:01Riddle, you're fired!
22:02Oh, terrific!
22:05Happy birthday to you
22:07Happy birthday to you
22:10Happy birthday, dear friend
22:15Happy birthday to you
22:18I need three more soups
22:22And two prawn cocktails
22:23Right, right
22:24I could strangle Albert for getting us into this
22:26I could strangle Albert, period
22:31Right, now
22:31There we go
22:34Happy birthday to you
22:35How many more times are they going to say
22:36Happy birthday, dear birthday?
22:39It's not every day you're separate, is it?
22:42Right, now listen
22:42I'll take the soups in, all right?
22:44All right
22:45Albert!
22:47Robin!
22:47Albert's back!
22:49Albert, you're back!
22:50I'm sorry I'm late
22:52That's all right, Albert, you're back!
22:54Oh, I told you, I told you blood's thicker than water
22:56What are you talking about?
22:58I don't know, I'm just pleased to see him
22:59Oh, well, come on, come on, give us a hand
23:01Yeah, but I'd like to explain, Mr. Nichols
23:03Albert, you don't have to explain
23:05Yeah, but you see
23:06There we are
23:10There we are
23:11There we are
23:12One soup for you, I believe
23:14Thank you
23:15And a soup for you, madam
23:18Oh, thank you very much, Albert
23:20Thank you
23:25Albert
23:26What do you think you're doing?
23:28Well, I was trying to explain to you, see
23:29I'm one of Fred's guests
23:31Happy birthday, Fred!
23:40You're watching Paramount 2, the home of comedy
23:42This evening's programming includes no less than 23 comics
23:45Including Fry and Laurie at 9.40
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