- 4 months ago
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00:00Υπότιτλοι AUTHORWAVE
00:30Υπότιτλοι AUTHORWAVE
01:00Υπότιτλοι AUTHORWAVE
01:02To be honest, it's hard to see what they're on about.
01:05It's got a phone, fabulously comfortable seats,
01:09cruise control, and it feels soft and flobbery.
01:13Like a big woolly bison.
01:15Υπότιτλοι AUTHORWAVE
01:17...
01:19Days is not that fast, either.
01:20They have a turbo and two intercoolers...
01:23...but it still only develops 300bhp.
01:27Way less than you get from the Germans.
01:34It is only when you really concentrate...
01:37...that you start to pick up the clues.
01:39The big alloy wheels.
01:43The blue engine cover.
01:47The seats, which seem to have been made out of David Dickinson.
01:52And those three little buttons on the dash.
01:55Comfort, Sport and Advanced.
01:59These buttons are the key that unlocks Volvo's all-new Skyhook system.
02:06Now, this is a system that's got more computing power than the CIA.
02:10So, let's push Sport and let's partially disengage one of the traction controls there.
02:20Now, let's see what happens.
02:31Now, at this precise moment, the computer is thinking,
02:35aha, that front wheel's losing grip, so I'm going to apply the brake to that.
02:38I'm going to back the engine power off.
02:40And what little power there is, I'm going to send it to the back to see if I can get the back out.
02:43And then I'm going to pump the shock absorber up here to see if that'll make a difference.
02:48And then, five hundredths of a second later, it changes its mind.
02:53It thinks, no, no, no, no, no, no.
02:54This has got all the power in the world.
02:55I'm going to unleash the engine's power and get it all coming to the front.
02:57Back it off to the back, get the back brakes on.
03:01From in here, I have no idea that any of this is going on.
03:06It's very relaxing.
03:08I can just sit here listening to the excellent stereo and speculate on whether or not these seats aren't really David Dickinson at all.
03:19They might be an off-cut of Dale Winton.
03:22A choice cut of Dale.
03:24So, the combination of four-wheel drive and two very clever traction control systems make this a safe, stylish, likeable, but slightly boring medium-speed cruiser.
03:40A rival for the BMW M3?
03:43I don't think so.
03:49Of course, the good thing about this technology is that when you've finished clowning around,
03:54you can put the suspension back into comfort bison mode, sink a little more deeply into Dale Winton and bumble home in your trilby, Volvo style.
04:07So, what happened to all that usual pointless, you know, skidding around in a cloud of smoke, headlights on, rubbish?
04:22It won't do it.
04:23It won't do it, honestly.
04:24It's almost as though the Volvo bosses said to their engineers,
04:27Go away, champs.
04:28Let your hair down.
04:29Not like that usual dancing queen.
04:31Let's have the full Aussie Osborne.
04:32They were a year working on it, and all they've done is made the normal S60 a little bit safer.
04:37I know what you mean.
04:38Okay, I've got the brochure here, and I've never seen so many of these stupid acronyms for driver controls.
04:44They've got DCC, Wheel Hop Control, DSTC, CRAP.
04:48What does it all...
04:48I mean, can you turn it off?
04:49No, the normal thing is, in a normal car, when you want to turn the traction control off,
04:54okay, you just have a button, push it, and it's off.
04:56Not in this, though.
04:57It says here that you're not allowed to do this unless you are highly experienced.
05:03And then it says that in order to do this, you have to press the button five times in succession with a certain frequency.
05:10Oh, God.
05:11Does it tell you what the frequency is?
05:13No, but this is the country that cracked the Enigma code, okay?
05:17So we had no problem working out what it was.
05:19And then when we'd got it off, we gave the car to the Stig.
05:24So, away he goes.
05:25Now, remember, the traction control is completely switched off, and the suspension is in advanced mode,
05:31which Volvo says make the S60 behave like a pure racing car, apparently.
05:35Stig's playing tribute to the walrus of love there.
05:41Now, he's looking tidy around Chicago.
05:43Not especially fast, it must be said.
05:45The real test here, the Hammerhead.
05:47Wow, there's plenty of understeer.
05:49Oh, dear, that's not good.
05:51Nothing like a pure racing car, then, in fact.
05:53Down to the follow-through.
05:56That is quick.
05:58Oh, careful, Stig.
06:00Now, coming up into the penultimate bend.
06:04Lurching a bit there over the first sector.
06:06The Volvo was four seconds down on the M3.
06:08as it slews to Gumball and across the line.
06:12And the time was one minute, 35 seconds, dead.
06:17Oh.
06:18So that goes there, basically.
06:20One minute, 35, dead.
06:22Which is still 3.2 slower than the M3, which is a lot.
06:26It is a lot, but look at it this way.
06:28It's less expensive than the M3, and it's less embarrassing than driving an M3.
06:32Deeply less embarrassing.
06:33And the great thing about the S60 is that you can have it as an estate car.
06:38And, actually, that is really nice.
06:39I think that is fabulous.
06:41I love that.
06:41It's very, very good.
06:43So, what I'd do is buy an Audi S4.
06:48Yes, good idea.
06:49Right, the news.
06:50Now, it has been a bad week for the Church of England,
06:52what with them being unable to decide whether they're in favour of homosexual cannons and bishops or not,
06:56and it all got a bit complicated.
06:58But they can take cheer from this.
06:59It's the Ford Focus C-Max.
07:02Basically, it's a Focus, but a little bit taller.
07:06There, did you see?
07:07So, your bishop can get in there quite easily with the mitre on, no problem.
07:12It's going to be priced competitively with Vauxhall Zafira and things like that,
07:15but key difference.
07:16Vauxhall Zafira has seven seats.
07:18Seven seats.
07:19This has five.
07:21Five seats.
07:22So, it's exactly the same as we said before,
07:24but you can drive it if you're a punk rocker.
07:26If you've got a Mohican, this is the car.
07:28So, it's punk rockers, bishops.
07:31Surviving First World War German soldiers with pointy helmets.
07:35I think it's a load of rubbish there.
07:37Yes, I'm inclined to agree.
07:38Now, the Conservatives.
07:40Yes.
07:40Two, three, three.
07:41Mixed response.
07:42No, mixed response there.
07:44Actually, this is the BBC, so we're impartial.
07:46Anyway, the Conservatives have decided that in order to win votes,
07:53they've said that if they're elected, they're going to up the motorway speed limit to 80 miles an hour.
07:59Yes.
08:00Hooray.
08:01Hooray.
08:02Do away with the vast majority of speed cameras.
08:05Hooray.
08:07Hooray.
08:08A purge of speed bumps.
08:09Hooray.
08:10Hooray.
08:11And best of all, they will abolish the M4 bus lane.
08:15Hooray.
08:16Hooray.
08:17Hooray.
08:18Hooray.
08:19Hooray.
08:20Hooray.
08:21Hooray.
08:22Ο κόβερματός, το λαμβόρματός, δεν είναι να βάβαια.
08:25Ήταν ένινε, στις ελεύθερες,
08:28ότι όταν θα είναι ελεύθερος,
08:30θα είναι να βάβαια όλοι του πρόεδρουσα στον πόλεμο.
08:36Είχα να είναι στον πόλεμο.
08:38ΦΕΡΙΟΥΣΗΗΝ ΦΕΡΙΕΕΣΗΣ!
08:40Εάν δεν είχαν να αντιμετωπιστόν.
08:43ΡΕΟΥΕΣ ΕΥΕΣΗΕΝΗΗΕΛΗΣ.
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