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00:00And he loves peckens and walnuts, and he simply adores his little cheese footballs, don't you, my darling?
00:12Oh, isn't he beautiful?
00:15Very attractive, little fella. What is it?
00:17He's a little Shih Tzu.
00:19Is he really? Oh, dear, dear, dear. What breed is it?
00:23Well, they're lapdogs, aren't they?
00:27A lapdog? Oh, how hard to imagine him stalking a reindeer, what?
00:32Major, can I get you another one?
00:33Why not, why not?
00:34Good. For you, Mrs Chase?
00:36Oh, nothing for me, thank you. But Prince would like a little saucer of warm milk, because it's nearly our bedtime.
00:41Yes, Manuel will attend to its heart's desires. I'm afraid I'm lumbered with the people tonight.
00:46And Manuel, por favor el perro microscopico.
00:51Oh, good evening, Roger Price.
00:53Good evening.
00:53What can I get you?
00:55And scotch, please. And I suppose it's too late to get anything to eat, is it? I missed dinner.
00:58What did you have in mind?
01:00Well, I rather fancy some sausages.
01:02Oh, I'm afraid chef would have knocked them away. We could do you sandwiches. Ham, cheese, tomato.
01:08Ham, thank you.
01:09Right, I'll just arrange it for you.
01:11Basil!
01:13Mr. Duff.
01:14Would you make some ham sandwiches, please?
01:16Look, I'm trying...
01:16For Dr. Price.
01:17Oh, of course. Yes, one bit of a dollar.
01:20Here we are, Major.
01:22Excuse me, Flown.
01:23Found another draught, have we?
01:25We have to be very careful, Mr. Fawlty. He's not very strong.
01:28Indeed, yes. A rapid movement of air could damage him irreparably.
01:32If only one could keep them in airtight containers.
01:35He would be able to breathe, would he, Fawlty?
01:37Well, he could try, Major. He could try.
01:39Anything else for you?
01:40No, thank you. No, it's a bit late. We'd better get upstairs.
01:43Quite.
01:43Come on, please.
01:46Sorry to have kept you.
01:47Doctor, one more hour, one more hour and two...
01:50Oh, just one, please.
01:50My favourite.
01:53No, no.
01:55She was the one he had with him the third time.
01:57The first one was the dowdy one.
01:59Then his wife.
02:00Then her.
02:01And now this red.
02:02Oh, yes.
02:03That must have been lovely.
02:05Number 12.
02:06Let's see.
02:11How very lovely.
02:13Yes, that was them.
02:15Not much.
02:16They get less fussy as they get older.
02:18Sorry about this.
02:19Please, it couldn't matter less.
02:21We're meeting in the morning anyway.
02:22You've had a long journey.
02:23You get a good night's sleep.
02:24Are you sure you're feeling all right?
02:25Oh, fine, fine.
02:26Just a little...
02:26Oh, yes, of course.
02:27Well, you get straight to bed and we'll pick you up here at 9.30.
02:30We'll have a coffee and go into the MD at 10.
02:32Fine, thanks, okay.
02:34Good night.
02:35Sleep well.
02:35Good night.
02:36Bye.
02:37See you in the morning.
02:37See you at 9.30.
02:39Sorry.
02:40Paris?
02:41Oh, no.
02:42On his own again.
02:43Oh, no.
02:45I wouldn't have thought so.
02:46He watches the football.
02:47Number 8, isn't it?
02:49Where are we?
02:52Are you feeling all right?
02:53Not too good, no.
02:54Oh, dear.
02:55Would you like a little hot something?
02:56Oh, no, no.
02:57Fine, thank you.
02:57Oh, well, if there's anything you need.
02:59Yes, thank you.
03:00No, that wasn't him.
03:01That was a new one.
03:02Good night.
03:03Good night.
03:05I said good night.
03:07Oh, good night.
03:08Didn't hurt, did it?
03:09Good manners cost nothing, dear.
03:12He's not feeling very well, Basil.
03:14You only have to say good night, dear.
03:15It's not the Gettysburg Address, is it?
03:17Basil, when you're not feeling well...
03:19Just two of the words, dear,
03:20to bring a little happiness into the world.
03:22Excuse me.
03:23Yes, Mr. Lehman.
03:24What can I do for you?
03:25Do you think I might have breakfast in bed in the morning?
03:27In bed?
03:28Yes.
03:28Of course, Mr. Lehman.
03:30Yes, we can manage there.
03:31Can we do that?
03:31Yes, we can.
03:32I'll pull you back.
03:32Yes, is it your legs?
03:34I'm sorry.
03:35Well, most of our guests manage to struggle down in the morning.
03:37I wanted to...
03:37A full breakfast or the Continental?
03:41Oh, I don't know.
03:42Our chef does a very good full breakfast.
03:44Eggs, bacon, sausage, tomato, fried bread.
03:47The Continental.
03:48You wouldn't care for kippers?
03:49Oh, fine.
03:50Kippers, yes.
03:51Toast, batter, marmalade.
03:52Yes, thank you.
03:53Tea or coffee?
03:54Yes.
03:54Tea, thank you.
03:56A newspaper?
03:56The Telegraph.
03:58Good night.
03:59Good night.
04:01Rosewood, mahogany, tea.
04:02I think you're fine.
04:06What would you like your breakfast tray made out of?
04:09I don't really mind.
04:10Are you sure?
04:11Fine.
04:11Well, you go along and have a really good night's sleep then.
04:13I'm hoping to get a couple of hours later on myself.
04:15I'll be up in good time to serve you your breakfast in bed.
04:18If you can remember to sleep with your mouth open,
04:20you won't even have to wake up.
04:21I'll just drop in small pieces of lightly buttered kipper
04:24when you're breathing in the right direction,
04:25if that doesn't put you out.
04:29Hazel.
04:30Sausages, please.
04:35Just sausages?
04:35Mm.
04:36Just sausages.
04:37Tea or coffee?
04:37Coffee, please.
04:38What is it?
04:39Oh, no, not a saucer.
04:41Come on.
04:42I said a bowl.
04:43A bowl.
04:44Yes, I'm not cold like that.
04:45That's too cold.
04:46I said tepid, didn't I?
04:48Mas grande, Manuel.
04:49De agua caliente.
04:51Ah.
04:51Catch pneumonia after that.
04:53And bring another cushion.
04:55He's not quite high enough.
04:57Sausage is on six, Terry.
04:59Coming up.
04:59Mas grande.
05:00Another car strike.
05:02Would you believe it?
05:03Put these kippers back, would you, Basil?
05:04They ought to get the buslins to run our car factories.
05:07In the fridge.
05:08You should have been eaten by.
05:09When was the sixth?
05:10Oh, that's all right.
05:11It says on the packet, Sybil.
05:13They're all right, Mr Fulton.
05:14The sixth?
05:14That's just to cover them, sir.
05:16Eggs and sausages, Paul.
05:17On the table, on the table, on the table.
05:25No.
05:30That.
05:30Now, put that under him.
05:34The cushion, the cushion.
05:38The cushion.
05:38The cushion.
05:39Yes.
05:41He bite me.
05:44You frightened him.
05:46You frightened him.
05:46I can't.
05:47You make sudden movements like that.
05:48Of course he's going to bite.
05:50Don't you have dogs in Calcutta?
05:56Excuse me, but I have an order for eggs and sausages for this table.
05:59Oh, yes.
06:00The sausages are for him.
06:01Oh.
06:03What's the matter in the world?
06:04He bite me.
06:06Cut them up.
06:07Cut them up into little pieces.
06:11No, not my eggs.
06:12Not my eggs.
06:13The sausages.
06:14Oh, sorry.
06:17He bite Polly too, you see.
06:19Look, if dogs are allowed in the dining room, at least the staff should know how to handle them.
06:23I'll cut them up in the kitchen, Mr Chase.
06:25Little pieces.
06:27Ahem.
06:29Get us ready.
06:30He hurt you, Polly.
06:33Basil, what are you doing?
06:34Do you know when the six was, Sybil?
06:35Will you just take it upstairs?
06:37They're all right, Mr Foley.
06:38Well, well, well, well, what are you supposed to be that?
06:40Basil, will you just take it up?
06:42What's the matter, Mammo?
06:43That hairy mosquito just bit us both.
06:45What?
06:45It's not right in the dining room like that.
06:47Well, she pays extra for the dog, Mammo, you see.
06:49Basil, it's after eight.
06:50Poisoning is still an offence in this country, you know, Sybil.
06:52Oh, go, do get a move on.
06:54We've got a busy day.
06:54I've got the laundry men.
06:55The laundry men?
06:56My God, a woman's work is never delegated.
06:59What are you doing, Polly?
07:01Just preparing some sausages.
07:04Bangers a la bang.
07:11Good morning, breakfast.
07:16Breakfast.
07:21Here we are.
07:22Another car strike.
07:23Milders, isn't it?
07:24Taxpayers pay millions each year.
07:25They get the money, go on strike.
07:27It's called socialism.
07:29I mean, if they don't like making cars,
07:30why don't they get themselves another bloody job
07:32designing cathedrals or composing violin concertos?
07:35The British Lain and Concerto,
07:36in four movements,
07:37all of them slow,
07:38with a four-hour tea break in between.
07:39I'll tell you why.
07:40Because they're not interested in anything
07:41except lounging them out in conveyor belts,
07:43stuffing themselves with my money.
07:44You don't mind if I turn the light off?
07:46Well, enjoy your breakfast.
07:47I'm sorry.
07:51I didn't catch that.
07:54Oh, not at all.
07:54Thank you for mentioning it.
07:57Unbelievable.
07:59Unbelievable.
08:00Not a single lucky word.
08:02Yeah, well, it's 5.30 in the morning
08:05so they can lounge around in bed till midday.
08:07Did you get some bunch of some word of things?
08:08What's that?
08:09Forgot the milk.
08:10Well, don't get talking to him.
08:11You never get away.
08:12Would you believe it?
08:13I get him his breakfast.
08:14I take it all the way upstairs.
08:16I lay it in front of him,
08:17hand him his newspaper.
08:18I tidy the room,
08:19draw the curtains,
08:19and guess what he says?
08:23I said, guess what he says?
08:25Nothing.
08:26Your friend.
08:29A one in eight.
08:29Nothing.
08:30Not a word.
08:31Are you listening?
08:32Hello?
08:32Hello?
08:33Can anybody hear me?
08:35Have I ceased to exist?
08:36Have I suddenly become invisible?
08:37Sybil, Sybil, Sybil, can you see me?
08:39No?
08:41Oh, good.
08:41Will I go and lie down there?
08:42No, I won't.
08:43I'll go and hit some guests.
08:46Poor little tomac-womac-on.
08:49Let me...
08:50Dr Price's sausages.
08:56What is he, Polly?
08:58He's dead.
08:59Dead?
09:00Who?
09:01Number eight.
09:02Lehman?
09:03But Basil's just took him his breakfast.
09:05He's cold.
09:06Oh, no.
09:11What's the matter with that dog?
09:13He is dead.
09:15Well, he's certainly struggling for life at the moment.
09:17Dead dog in the breakfast room, eh?
09:19Egon Roney'd knock off a star for that.
09:21No, no, Mr Lehman.
09:22Dead.
09:24Well, that would explain a lot.
09:25No, Mr. Lehman.
09:27Really?
09:28Paul just said so.
09:29What are you on about?
09:30I just took him his kippers.
09:32Oh, my God.
09:36Egon's dead.
09:37Wait up, wait up.
09:38Wait.
09:40I just put the milk down on the tray.
09:43But I leave...
09:43What are you doing?
09:45What are you doing?
09:46I told her, I told her, the six weeks, you get 20 years for this.
09:49What?
09:50The kippers, the kippers.
09:51Oh, my God.
09:52Mr. Polly, he's been dead for hours.
09:54Mr. Polly, he's cold.
09:57He's been dead for hours.
09:57He must have died in his sleep.
09:59Mr. Polly.
10:00What?
10:01What?
10:01He hasn't touched those kippers.
10:03Well, look.
10:05Feel him.
10:07What?
10:08Feel him.
10:13He's turned cold.
10:14Yes.
10:16Oh, joy.
10:18Oh, thank you.
10:19Oh, isn't it wonderful?
10:21I'm so happy.
10:22Hooray!
10:25Sam, excuse me.
10:30Oh, that's cool.
10:33Bit stuffy, isn't it?
10:34I'll open a window.
10:36Who?
10:37Who found the body?
10:38Polly did.
10:40I was bringing him up the milk and we'd forgotten it.
10:44You brought the milk with the breakfast?
10:45No, the breakfast was already up.
10:48Well, who brought the breakfast?
10:50Who found it?
10:53Oh, I brought the breakfast.
10:56What's that?
10:58That's a bit of it.
10:59A bit of what?
11:00A bit of the breakfast.
11:03You brought him his breakfast?
11:04Yes.
11:05So you told her how he was dead?
11:06Yes.
11:08Well, then, why did you bring him...
11:10Why did you bring him the milk, then?
11:15Why?
11:16Yes.
11:16Why?
11:17Well, when he said Mr. Lehman was dead,
11:20I thought he said he's still in bed.
11:22Well, he didn't exactly say he was dead, Doctor.
11:24Well, I said he was pretty quiet.
11:26Quiet?
11:26Exactly.
11:27What were you talking to him about, Basil?
11:29Car strikes, was it?
11:31Thank you, Sybil.
11:32I don't understand.
11:33He's been dead for about ten hours.
11:35Oh, yes, it's so final, isn't it?
11:36Basil.
11:37Well, wouldn't you say it was final, dear?
11:38I'd say it was pretty bloody final.
11:41Do you mean to tell me you didn't realise this man was dead?
11:43Well, people don't talk that much in a morning.
11:44Oh, look, I'm just delivering a tray, right?
11:46If the guest isn't singing,
11:47Oh, what a beautiful morning,
11:48I don't immediately think,
11:49Oh, there's another one snuffed it in the night,
11:51another name in the Fawlty Tower's Book of Remembrance.
11:53I mean, this is a hotel, not the Burma Railway.
11:56Basil, but I mean, he does actually say hotel outside.
11:58I mean, perhaps I should be more specific.
12:00Hotel for people who have a better than 50% chance
12:03of making it through the night.
12:04What are you looking at me like that for?
12:10Basil, there's a kipper sticking out of your junk.
12:13Oh, there it is.
12:18I've been looking for that.
12:19That's the other one.
12:21We'll be downstairs, Doctor.
12:23Shall I ring the undertaker?
12:24Would you, Polly?
12:25I've been up since 5.30, you know.
12:30He was leaving today.
12:32Some people are coming at lunchtime.
12:33Well, we'll put him in another room.
12:34We're full tonight.
12:36Oh, do put that away.
12:38Get the body into the office
12:40until the undertaker's come.
12:41Now.
12:41When Doctor's finished.
12:47What are you doing?
12:48Making up his bill.
12:50Who are you going to give it to?
12:51Well, leave it in his wallet.
12:52They're bound to look there.
12:54Better not charge him for breakfast.
12:56Mr Simpkins?
12:58Fawlty Tower's here.
12:59I'm afraid somebody's died during the night.
13:02When could you collect the body?
13:04Somebody?
13:05Anybody, really?
13:05Good morning, good morning.
13:07You're very careful this morning, Mr Fawlty.
13:09Yes, well, one of the guests has just died.
13:13You are wicked.
13:16Manuel, Manuel, Manuel.
13:19Manuel, we go and get the body.
13:22Polly, Polly, Polly.
13:23Yes, if you can.
13:24Oh, would it be all right to move, please?
13:30Could I use the phone, please?
13:31I have to call the coroner.
13:32The coroner?
13:33I can't give him his death certificate.
13:34I'm not his doctor.
13:35I have to report his death to the coroner.
13:36Oh, I see, of course.
13:37Do come his way, doctor.
13:40All clear.
13:41All clear.
13:42It's heavy.
13:45Good morning, then, Bill.
13:46Good morning.
13:49It's all right.
13:49Leave it.
13:50No, leave it.
13:50It's heavy.
13:51Oh, no, it's quite all right.
13:51Put them like that.
13:52No, don't bother.
13:52We can manage.
13:53Oh, just don't bother.
13:54No, no, leave it alone.
13:55I know.
13:55If I just fold them like this.
13:56Yes, go away.
13:57Move, move, move, move, move, move.
13:58I'll do it, Miss Tid.
14:01No, it's all right.
14:04He's dead.
14:05You're right.
14:08It's all right, Miss Tid.
14:10Shut up, shut up.
14:10Oh, my God.
14:12Snap her, snap her.
14:13What?
14:13She's hysterical.
14:14Snap her.
14:14Murder.
14:15Snap her.
14:16Murder.
14:16Snap her.
14:20Oh, spiffing.
14:21Absolutely spiffing.
14:22Well done.
14:24Too dead, 25 to go.
14:27Drink.
14:27Fine.
14:28I just dropped my ring.
14:38Oh, there it is.
14:41Oh, sorry, I'm in your way.
14:43That's quite all right.
14:47Oh, is this your room?
14:48Yes.
14:49Oh, it's lovely, isn't it?
14:50Yes.
14:52Did you enjoy your breakfast?
14:53Oh, yes, thank you.
14:54Yes.
14:54At Tuesdays, do you think we could just go inside and get on?
14:57Not really.
14:57Pardon?
14:59Well, it's been cleaned.
15:01Mr. Fawlty's doing it.
15:02But we want to get our things.
15:03Yes, we're going out, you see.
15:04Oh, well, it'll only take a couple of minutes.
15:06Oh, I'm sorry.
15:07We're a little late.
15:07Excuse me.
15:08Excuse me.
15:09Mr. Fawlty?
15:10Mr. Fawlty?
15:11Oh, dear.
15:12Mr. Fawlty?
15:13Oh, dear.
15:14Oh, shit.
15:15Mr. and Mrs. White want to come into their room.
15:17Wait a minute.
15:25Hello.
15:27Oh, can we come in?
15:29I was just explaining that you were doing the room.
15:31Yes, won't be five minutes.
15:32Well, couldn't you do it later?
15:36Pick that ass strap.
15:37Will you, Manuel, please?
15:38The big one.
15:39Could we do it later?
15:40When we've got our things.
15:41Well, it'll only be a couple of minutes.
15:43Look, Fawlty, we want our things.
15:46Oh, right, yes, thank you so much.
15:50He's locked it.
15:52Oh, well, that's just a precaution.
15:55Have you locked this?
15:57Only slightly.
16:00Will you let us in?
16:02In a bit.
16:04Come on, now get the cups.
16:05Get the cups.
16:08What's going on?
16:09Well, he's a bit of a perfectionist.
16:14Ready?
16:16What's been going on in here?
16:18Well, we tried rearranging the furniture,
16:20but it didn't really work.
16:20Manuel has a coat.
16:28It's all right.
16:29He's from Barcelona.
16:32What's that noise?
16:33Oh, it's just my back.
16:34No, no, that morning.
16:36Oh, yes, that's all.
16:37No, no, it's coming from the cupboard.
16:40Well, we'll get some oil.
16:41Have a nice day.
16:42Is someone in there?
16:43What?
16:43Yes, listen.
16:44No, no, no.
16:46Oh, Pete.
16:47Good Lord, so there is.
16:49Let them out.
16:49Good idea.
16:50Right.
16:50Well, go on.
16:52Yes, we're going to.
16:52It's the next thing on the list.
16:53Oh, if you do get a chance to visit the museum.
16:56Open it now, will you?
16:57Oh, all right, yes, right.
16:59Oh, it's locked.
17:02Oh, damn.
17:03Where's the key?
17:04Yes, sir, where is the key?
17:05Do you have any idea, Polly, Manuel?
17:06I expect we'd love to dance there somewhere.
17:08Phil, where's the key?
17:09Didn't you see your bucket?
17:10No, it isn't.
17:11Yes, it did.
17:11Oh, yes, it didn't.
17:13Yes, it didn't.
17:14Yes, it didn't.
17:15Oh, well done, Manuel.
17:17Thank you very much.
17:19Right.
17:19Well, we've got it now.
17:20It's all right.
17:20All right.
17:21I will.
17:21I will.
17:22I will.
17:23Oh, yes.
17:24Oh, yes.
17:25Oh, yes.
17:25Oh, yes.
17:26Oh, yes.
17:27Now, I've warned you about this before.
17:33You can hide in your own cupboard, but not in other people's.
17:36I'm sorry about this.
17:37You can't really blame her.
17:38She doesn't have much in her life.
17:39She has to make her own entertainment.
17:40She has trouble with her arm.
17:42That's why she goes in the cupboard.
17:43Exactly.
17:44Are you feeling better?
17:45Her arm gets stuck there.
17:47It's always happening to her.
17:49He's dead.
17:50This is her husband.
17:50She hasn't got over.
17:51He died 30 years ago.
17:52She doesn't mean any arm.
17:55In the cupboard.
17:56No more today.
17:58You've had enough.
17:59Oh, my God.
18:00Look at that.
18:00Look.
18:01Look.
18:14Thank you, Madeline.
18:16That's enough.
18:17You're good.
18:18Anything else we can do for you?
18:23What was so horrible, Mrs. Fawlty?
18:25You've no idea.
18:26Oh, I know.
18:28It was pitch black in there.
18:29And that thing with its hand...
18:32Oh, I know.
18:35Now, you have a little rest and try to think of something else.
18:38But anything could have happened.
18:40Well, he was dead, dear.
18:42A man is a man, Mrs. Fawlty.
18:44Oh, I know.
18:46I shall speak to him about it.
18:47Speak to him?
18:48To Mr. Fawlty.
18:50We're his oldest residence.
18:51Well, have a little rest first.
18:53Frightening me like that.
18:54I shall speak to him.
18:56Have a word with him in a little while when you're feeling better.
18:59Mm-hmm.
19:01I see.
19:01Yes.
19:03It's all right, dear.
19:04They've got rooms at the sea view.
19:05Tonight?
19:06Yes.
19:06Well, let's have a look at it.
19:07Yes.
19:07And if that's no good, we'll try the one up by the prophylactic emporium.
19:13Okay.
19:19Very, very.
19:25Morning, Fawlty.
19:26Oh, hello, Major.
19:27Any sign of the papers?
19:30You've got it, Major.
19:31Have I?
19:32Oh, yes, I have.
19:34Oh, I say.
19:35I say, Fawlty.
19:35He doesn't look quite the ticket.
19:37Well, Major, um, don't say anything to anybody, but he's dead.
19:42Ah.
19:43Shot, was he?
19:45No, no, no, died in his sleep.
19:47In his sleep?
19:48Ah, well, you're off your guard, you see.
19:51Yes, yes, Fawlty.
19:52Fawlty, I shouldn't let him lie around here, you know.
19:55No, no, no, the undertakers are coming to get him.
19:57Ah, because they attract the flies, you see.
20:02Look, I've been waiting in there.
20:04What?
20:05I haven't had any breakfast yet.
20:06Oh!
20:06Oh, er, right, sorry.
20:08Er, coming, coming.
20:10It's only sausages.
20:16Mr. Fawlty.
20:17Mr. Fawlty.
20:18I want a word, will you please?
20:20Sorry about the delay, Doctor.
20:28Normal service has been resumed as soon as possible.
20:30More coffee?
20:33Tee, Tee, I'll turn the radio back.
20:38Oh, no.
20:39Oh, no.
20:39Would you believe it?
20:40What did you put him there for?
20:41Well, he wouldn't fit the safe and all the drawers were full.
20:44Come on, man.
20:45Come on.
20:46Oh.
20:47Oh.
20:48Oh.
20:49Oh, no.
20:50Oh, no.
20:51Would you believe it?
20:52What did you put him there for?
20:53Well, he wouldn't fit the safe and all the drawers were full.
20:54Oh, no.
20:55Oh, no.
20:56Wonderful.
20:57Isn't it our guests?
20:58They give us trouble even when they're dead.
20:59Come on.
21:00Where are you taking him?
21:01Kitchen.
21:02What?
21:03What?
21:04What?
21:05What?
21:06Holly.
21:07Just a moment.
21:16Hello.
21:30Be serious.
21:31You.
21:32Oh, dear.
21:33Well, don't you stand there.
21:34Call a vet.
21:35Right.
21:40On the table.
21:49Sorry about them.
21:50Bit overdone, I'm afraid.
21:51Send them down the crematorium.
21:54Oh.
21:55You can't give a dead body in here where there's food.
21:57Can't we?
21:58Of course not.
21:59Oh, right.
22:00Okay.
22:01Sorry.
22:02Where?
22:03Where?
22:04In the basket.
22:05Not in here.
22:06What?
22:07Not in the kitchen.
22:08Oh, right.
22:09Hmm aquilo.
22:10Oh, I'm looking after Miss Tibbs, Basil.
22:12Oh, what have ya been there?
22:14Oh, ah, what?
22:20Oh, some more.
22:22I'm looking after Miss Tibbs, Basil.
22:24How are you feeling, dear?
22:26Won't be two minutes.
22:27OK.
22:28Sorry about that, Doctor.
22:30Wash your hands first, please.
22:32Oh, right.
22:33And make sure this area is scrubbed before any more food is prepared in here.
22:35Absolutely.
22:36Sausage is accepted.
22:37You may cook them immediately.
22:38I'll take the risk.
22:39Of course.
22:40Of course.
22:41Too sweet.
22:44Leave it.
22:45No, no, I take it.
22:46Leave it.
22:47No, no, it's not time.
22:48Please.
22:49No, no, no, please.
22:50I'm sitting here.
22:51Is your lunch still trying?
22:52I'm still having breakfast.
22:53It's finished.
22:54All gone.
22:55Breakfast kaput.
22:56I'm having sausages.
22:58He's not allowed.
23:00Put that there.
23:01Look, I'm a doctor.
23:02I'm a doctor and I want my sausages.
23:04I tell you, it's finished.
23:06Bye-bye, please.
23:07Bye-bye.
23:12Now, look.
23:13It's finished.
23:15Give those to me.
23:17Come on, come on.
23:18No, it's not possible.
23:20You're not allowed.
23:21You're not allowed.
23:22You're not allowed.
23:23You're not allowed.
23:24You're not allowed.
23:25You're not allowed.
23:26You're not allowed.
23:27You're not allowed.
23:28I'm trying to sit down.
23:29He keeps moving things from my table.
23:30I'm so sorry.
23:31He doesn't seem to understand that I haven't finished breakfast.
23:33Manuel.
23:35Manuel, let me explain.
23:38I'll be ready in just a couple of minutes.
23:39There we are, Mr. Ingrams.
23:40Number eight.
23:41Top of the stairs on the right.
23:42Excuse me, not coming up with you.
23:43One of our guests has been taken ill.
23:45Ah.
23:46Excuse me.
23:47In the office.
23:48Excuse me.
23:49Yes?
23:50We have an appointment with Mr. Leeman.
23:52Do you know where he is?
23:53Where he is?
23:54Where he is, um.
23:55Would he be in the dining room?
23:56Might he be in his room?
23:57Let me think, um.
23:58Where he is.
23:59Where..
24:00Where is..
24:01..I think?
24:02Ah.
24:03Give us a break.
24:05Ah.
24:06Excuse me.
24:08Excuse me.
24:09Excuse me.
24:10Excuse me.
24:11Excuse me.
24:12It's in the office.
24:13Excuse me.
24:14Yes.
24:15We have an appointment with Mr. Leeman.
24:18Do you know where he is?
24:19Where he is?
24:20Um.
24:21What do you think?
24:22Would he be in the dining room?
24:23There is.
24:25We've come to collect him.
24:27We're taking him to a meeting.
24:29We've come to collect him.
24:31Oh, you've come to collect him?
24:33Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realise.
24:36Modern dress.
24:38What?
24:38Your dress is very modern.
24:42I didn't realise women did it.
24:44Did what?
24:46He's downstairs.
24:48No, no, in the basket.
24:51I beg your pardon.
24:53He's in the basket.
24:54In the basket?
24:55Yes.
24:56Hello.
24:58What's...
24:58What's he doing in the basket?
25:03Well, not much.
25:06What are you talking about?
25:08Don't you believe...
25:09Look, look.
25:20Oh, my God, he's gone.
25:21Where is he?
25:22Fresh laundry.
25:23They've taken him.
25:36Oh, no.
25:39Oh, no.
25:40Basil!
25:40If you could just hang on a couple of minutes.
25:43Sorry to keep you.
25:44oh it's all right it's all right we sorted it out he's in this one oh the
25:53doctor didn't want him in the kitchen so we've put him in the basket it's more
25:56hygienic yes you do work here yes well we'd like to speak to the manager well
26:06I'm the manager is there a problem but he is really no and there seems to be
26:13something a kind of misunderstanding here we've come to collect one of your
26:17guests mr. Lehman to take him into town for a meeting meeting yes a meeting with
26:23our managing director oh I see miss mr. Lehman yes we thought you said the
26:33linen brilliant sorry sorry sorry to keep you hello my sweet what are you doing
26:39that well it's a bit involved here but we thought that these gentlemen thought that
26:42we thought that they were coming for mr. Lehman and we thought that they were
26:48coming to collect the linen mr. Lehman yes so if you just sort that one out there
26:53I'll take the linen upstairs okay I see thank you
26:56not at all
26:59I'm coming into the office for a moment
27:05yeah another one for you
27:12no no no same one major
27:14no no same one major
27:15ah
27:16come on
27:19oh sorry sorry come here like that sorry
27:21no
27:23they've gone into the top
27:24in there
27:25oh
27:27oh
27:31oh
27:32oh
27:33oh
27:48oh
27:50oh
27:51oh
27:52oh
27:54I don't work here anymore.
27:55Open the basket, ma!
27:56Open the basket!
28:01Now, inside!
28:04Not you!
28:05I quit!
28:05Get out!
28:06I'll strike!
28:07I'm warning you!
28:07I stay here, it's nice!
28:10You see this?
28:11You're next!
28:14Really, I'm so sorry.
28:17Goodbye.
28:18Goodbye.
28:18Goodbye.
28:20Goodbye.
28:21Goodbye.
28:22Goodbye.
28:24Yes?
28:25Could I get my hat?
28:27Your hat?
28:29Yes.
28:30It's just there.
28:31Yes, I'll have it sent on.
28:32What?
28:33Do you have a card?
28:34With your address, I'll send it on.
28:35Well, could I just get it?
28:37Well, do you have to have it now?
28:39Well, yes.
28:40What's the problem if you lose it?
28:41I mean, it's windy today.
28:42I'd like to have it.
28:43Oh, right.
28:44Manuel!
28:45Manuel!
28:46He's in the basket.
28:47Manuel!
28:48He's in the basket.
28:49Manuel!
28:50Yes!
28:51Yes!
28:52Yes!
28:53He's in the basket!
28:54Oh, Polly!
28:55Would you get Manuel out of the basket, please?
28:56Manuel?
28:57Yes, come on, girl.
28:58What's the matter?
28:59He isn't in there.
29:00Yes, he is!
29:01He isn't?
29:02He is!
29:03Look for him!
29:04Oh, sorry.
29:05You big scum!
29:07See?
29:10Manuel, would you get this gentleman in his house, please?
29:12Where?
29:13There!
29:14On the rack.
29:15Sorry, what colour was it?
29:16Brown!
29:17Brown!
29:18No, that's not it.
29:19No.
29:21Mr Fawlty, I want a word with you in your office.
29:23Yes, when would be convenient for you?
29:25I'm 79.
29:26What on earth is going on here?
29:28Oh, sorry about the idea.
29:29I only got a bit caught.
29:30My baby!
29:31My baby's dying!
29:32They poisoned him!
29:33Oh, baby?
29:34Sybil!
29:35He said he'd call for a vet!
29:37A vet?
29:38Sybil!
29:39I've just cooked these sausages myself and they're off.
29:41They should have been eaten by the fur.
29:43Ah, there you are, dear.
29:44You do look nice.
29:45Ladies and gentlemen.
29:46Ladies and gentlemen.
29:48Lorde is ready!
29:49Ladies and gentlemen, there have been a lot of cock-ups this morning.
29:52You all deserve an explanation and I'm happy to say
29:54that my wife will give it to you.
29:57Thank you, Sybil.
29:58I would like to make it to you.
29:59What's going on, old boy?
30:10Basil!
30:11Basil!
30:12Basil!
30:13Basil!
30:14Basil!
30:15Basil!
30:16Basil!
30:17Basil!
30:18Basil!
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