- 2 days ago
Meet the Browns-S1E6
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00:02I'm wrapped up, tied up, and I'm tangled up in cheese.
00:08Ooh, Carver.
00:10Well, something smell good.
00:11What you cooking?
00:11Oh, I got egg whites, turkey bacon, and grapefruit.
00:15Woo! Turkey bacon?
00:16Yes.
00:17Carver, I didn't know pigs and turkeys be made.
00:20I done seen a turkey, and ain't no bacon on it.
00:24It tastes like shoes.
00:26It tastes like shoes.
00:30Where's Miss Daisy? She's used to the first one now.
00:33I don't know.
00:33I haven't seen her this morning.
00:35Mr. Brown, can you tell Miss Daisy her breakfast is getting cold?
00:39Yes.
00:41Daisy!
00:42I'm ready!
00:43Your food's getting cold!
00:45She's gone, like, I could've did that, Mr. Brown.
00:48Daisy!
00:48You're on the ready!
00:49Your food's getting cold!
00:50Can you please just fuck in, Miss Daisy?
00:52You said tell.
00:54You didn't say go get tell.
00:55Well, go and tell Miss Daisy her breakfast is getting cold.
00:57Thank you so much.
00:58Daisy!
01:00She said nobody want more nasty turkey bacon anyway.
01:03It tastes like cardboard.
01:08Whoa, you big!
01:09What's wrong with you?
01:12I'm pregnant.
01:13What's your excuse?
01:16How can I help you, big mama?
01:18My name is Tamika, and I need a place to stay.
01:22Why everybody think they can come here and stay?
01:25What you think this is?
01:26A motel?
01:26Look, you can't come here and stay.
01:29Come back in 50 years, I'll leave the lights on for you.
01:32Please, please, sir.
01:33I've been looking all over town, and every place is full.
01:37Well, you don't have no people?
01:40My family threw me out once they knew I was pregnant.
01:45I went to a bunch of places.
01:47Then Brianna said you could help me out.
01:49Brianna?
01:51She barely got a place to stay herself.
01:53How's she going to invite somebody to somebody else's house?
01:56I'm sorry, but you can't stay here.
01:58You ain't got to go home, but you got to...
02:02Look, don't start crying, you're going...
02:06I'm trying to keep from crying.
02:10Look, sit down, don't cry.
02:12You're going to make me cry.
02:19Don't...
02:20I can't stand to see women crying.
02:40What am I crying for?
02:43Brianna, get in here!
02:46What's up, Mr. Brown?
02:48Bye, Mr. Brown.
02:49Get back here!
02:50What's going on?
02:53I'm here, so...
02:54Where's my room?
02:55Uh, you know Paprika?
02:58It's Tamika.
03:00Tamika, Paprika, all the Rikas, I don't know.
03:03Do you know her?
03:03Can somebody explain to me what's going on?
03:05I told you I had to ask them first.
03:09Can she stay?
03:11No!
03:14This is the place for seniors.
03:16Ow!
03:18Well, I am a senior.
03:21I'm in the 12th grade.
03:22Hey, Mr. Brown, you can't just throw her out on the street.
03:25Why?
03:25She got people.
03:26You got aunties, uncles, cousins, grandmamas, granddaddy...
03:29Senator Angelina and Brad.
03:30They always adopt themselves.
03:32They got puppies, horses, calves.
03:34They got kids, Asians, Africans.
03:37Mr. Brown, okay, okay, okay.
03:39First of all, how many months are you, sweetheart?
03:41And how far are you?
03:42Oh, Corbin, that's going to be hard to see how many months.
03:44Because if she's 17, you divide 17...
03:47Let me...
03:50I'm nine months.
03:51Oh, no, she can't be nine months, Corbin.
03:53Because I got a little niece.
03:54She's nine months, and this girl too tall for nine months.
03:57But look, what about your parents?
03:59Where are your parents?
04:00Um, they put me out.
04:02Okay, if you divide 12 into the 17 years...
04:08Are you hungry?
04:10A little snack would be nice.
04:12Okay, all right, sweet.
04:12I can take care of that.
04:13I have a taste of steak, mashed potatoes, spaghetti, pig feast, and peanuts.
04:18Pig feast and peanuts.
04:19Look, look, look, look.
04:21Baby.
04:21Wait a minute, baby.
04:22Wait, oh, sweetheart, sweetheart.
04:23But baby, baby, look.
04:24All we have is egg whites, grapefruit, and turkey bacon.
04:28Don't eat the turkey bacon.
04:29It's nasty.
04:30It tastes like cardboard.
04:31That's fine.
04:32Okay, all right.
04:33Brianna, take her in the kitchen and get her some breakfast,
04:36and I'm going to call Corbin and see if she can help us out.
04:39Figure out this.
04:41Uh-huh.
04:41Corbin, I got it.
04:44She's 204 months old.
04:45Mr. Corbin, I wonder how many months I am, Corbin.
04:49Well, I know how many months you are.
04:50Oh, you know that in your head?
04:52How many months am I?
04:53Nine.
04:59Ten.
05:00Jack.
05:03Queen, king, gang.
05:06Bam!
05:07Booyah!
05:09Edna, Edna, that's three in a row.
05:11You must be marking the cards.
05:13Hey, I mark my cards like I mark my men.
05:19What you guys doing?
05:21Playing tongue.
05:23Why don't we play some real cards?
05:26Real cards like what?
05:28How about a little poker, ladies and gentlemen?
05:32Texas Hold'em.
05:33One-eyed jacks and deuces well.
05:37Who taught you how to play poker?
05:39Some of the kids at recess.
05:41Oh, thank you so much for checking, Tomeika.
05:44Oh, she'll be fine.
05:46Just make sure she gets plenty of rest.
05:48Okay.
05:48Let's hope that Corbin finds her a place really soon.
05:51Yes, really soon, because she's about to eat us out of house and home.
05:54Girl, okay.
05:57Kara, I can't find Miss Daisy.
05:59She's gone.
05:59What, she's gone upstairs?
06:00Kara, if she was upstairs, I wouldn't say, Kara, I can't find Miss Daisy.
06:04She's gone now.
06:05She ain't upstairs.
06:06I just want you to come up now.
06:07Did you check the restroom?
06:09Yes.
06:09Did you call?
06:10Yes.
06:10Did you, everything up there?
06:11Yeah, Kara, we need to call the police.
06:12We need to call the FBI.
06:14We're going to call them people and put on the front of the milk card.
06:16Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, Brown.
06:18You don't want to do that.
06:19Every kid in America stops drinking milk.
06:21Well, we got to call somebody.
06:22Hey, guys, anybody know whose scarf this is?
06:25I found it outside on the street.
06:26Yeah, that's Daisy.
06:27She had it on last night.
06:29Oh, my goodness.
06:31This is the scarf that Orson Welles gave her.
06:33She wouldn't part with this.
06:35Everybody, we got to go looking for her.
06:37We'll have to look for her.
06:38I'll go look for her outside.
06:40Hakeem.
06:42Okay, I'm going to go find my cell phone and call Will.
06:44Okay.
06:45Oh, Lord, I hope they can find her.
06:47Oh, me too.
06:48Oh, Mr. Brown, I didn't know you felt like that.
06:52About Miss Daisy.
06:54Oh, you touched me to my soul.
06:56What the?
06:57Anna, get off of me.
07:00Need a shower now.
07:03Besides London, she my biggest cash cow.
07:07When she don't bring in much cash, she just my biggest cow.
07:11And I miss that cow.
07:16Oh, what a wuss.
07:23So, Tamika, when was the date of your last doctor's visit?
07:27I've been living on the street since my parents kicked me out.
07:31Oh.
07:32I don't want to get too personal, but can you tell me about the father?
07:37He's not around.
07:39When he found out I was pregnant, he broke up with me and started going out with Miss
07:43Daisy.
07:44Oh, stinking behind, running behind my back, talking about me bad in school, about to get
07:48snacked in the side of the way.
07:53Hey, what about your parents?
07:55Where are your parents?
07:57My parents don't want anything to do with me.
08:00When they found out I was pregnant, I ran away to stay with my aunt.
08:06Oh, I thought you told me that they put you out.
08:13I don't remember.
08:16A lot has happened in the last nine months, as you can see.
08:20Yeah, I see.
08:24Uh, do you mind if I talk to you two out in the hallway for a second?
08:29Oh, sure, sure.
08:30We'll be back.
08:34Be right back, Tamika.
08:39Oh, my God.
08:40Now, we all know that little girl hasn't been living on the street.
08:43Right?
08:44Yeah, never seen a homeless girl with a French manicure.
08:48Somebody somewhere loves that little girl, though.
08:50Well, we definitely need to find her parents.
08:53I'm on it.
08:54Yeah.
08:55Now we have to find parents and Miss Daisy.
08:57Where could she be?
09:03Look, Sheldon.
09:05What you gonna do?
09:06You gotta make a decision.
09:14Yes, call me if you hear anything.
09:17Okay, thank you.
09:19Oh.
09:20Hey, any interluck?
09:22We haven't found her.
09:23She's nowhere in sight.
09:24Yeah, we even checked the hoochie-coochie clubs when she wasn't there.
09:27But, um, Edna made a hundred bucks.
09:30What?
09:32And I only had to dance to one song.
09:35And 50 of them came out of my pocket.
09:37Colonel!
09:40Well, that was awesome.
09:41Hey, guys, did you find her?
09:43Oh, no, no, no, we couldn't find her.
09:45Yeah, we checked at the movies, the arcade, the laser deck place, and the bowling alley.
09:52And she wasn't in any one of those places.
09:55Ah, yeah, you look real, huh?
09:57Yes.
09:57Cora, yes?
09:59I call the police.
10:00They said they can't do nothing until she's been missing 24 hours.
10:0324 hours?
10:04Yes, Cora.
10:06Well, she's out there somewhere.
10:07We just can't sit around here and do nothing.
10:09I gotta look for her.
10:11I'll drive you, Cora, if you want.
10:13Okay, I'm gonna go.
10:14I'm gonna ride.
10:16All right, all right.
10:17Get my purse.
10:18You going?
10:18You going?
10:19Yes, we're going, sweetie.
10:20Okay, come on.
10:21Let's check for her at the ice cream shop this time.
10:24Good, all right.
10:25Wait, what's going on?
10:27We're going to get some ice cream.
10:29Come on, let's go.
10:30Mmm, thanks.
10:32Brianna, you know you can get me a double-fuzz chocolate sundae with whipped cream and strawberries.
10:37She needs to get some food stamps.
10:40I guess I gotta come, too.
10:43All right, Mr. Brown, call us if you hear anything, okay?
10:46I will, Cora.
10:47Okay, Cora, get off my bed.
10:49Your bed?
10:50Yes, with that pregnant girl sleeping in my room, I got to sleep on the couch, so get out of
10:54my bed.
10:57Move.
10:58Sit right there and watch everything.
11:02Okay.
11:04Okay.
11:05Get this thing right.
11:08Brown, what are you doing?
11:09I'm trying to get comfortable.
11:13Okay.
11:14Colonel, turn after the light.
11:18Colonel, can you bring me a warm glass of milk?
11:21No.
11:22Well, can you read me a story?
11:24No.
11:26Well, let's pray.
11:27That's what we...
11:28Let's pray.
11:29Colonel, you can pray.
11:30Don't turn your back on the Lord.
11:33Who put shoes on your table?
11:35Who put food on your feet?
11:38I know that the Lord is able to bring you out.
11:41Come out of there.
11:43Colonel, you talking about...
11:44Come on out of there.
11:46All right, let's get this over with.
11:48That devil is in your belly.
11:50I don't think so.
11:53Okay, bow your head, Colonel.
11:55Bow your head, the Lord.
11:57You're going to get strong.
11:59Okay.
12:00Do your hands like this.
12:01The Lord can hear you when you do like this.
12:02That's why I do that.
12:04Okay, you got to take your glasses off.
12:06He ain't going to be able to see you.
12:09Okay.
12:10So mean.
12:11You got the devil all in your belly.
12:16Lord, it's me, Mr. Brown, again.
12:18And the Colonel, say hey to the Lord, Colonel.
12:21Hey.
12:23Lord, oh, the Lord told me to tell you to call him more often.
12:26He ain't talked to you in a while.
12:28Lord, we come to you with bowed heads and humble hearts to just say thanks for this day.
12:36Lord, we just come right...
12:38We ain't through.
12:40Lord, we ask for your Godness to find Peppericka's mama and Miss Daisy, Lord.
12:47And this prayer to end.
12:48Amen.
12:49No, we ain't through.
12:50Oh, it ain't that good, Colonel.
12:53It ain't that deep.
12:54Brown, that's what me.
12:55That's Tamika.
12:58Help!
12:58My water broke.
13:00You better not be breaking nothing in my room.
13:03Brown, she's talking about giving birth.
13:05Giving birth?
13:06Well, I better hurry up.
13:08Lord, good food and good meat.
13:10When the baby come, let it be head first and not feet.
13:13Amen.
13:14She knows she's going to have a baby right now.
13:16Come on.
13:16We don't know nothing about having no babies.
13:18How are we going to get your baby?
13:19I don't know.
13:21I know you ain't trying to have no baby up here on me.
13:24You ain't going to deliver no puppies in my house.
13:26I'm not going to have them.
13:29No, you're not.
13:29You can't have these puppies on me because I don't know nothing about birth of no babies.
13:34Give it a hold of yourself.
13:38Go ahead and try to call Will.
13:41Go bring my tool belt and bring some plows and duct tape.
13:46Where's the doctor?
13:47I'm going to help him out in case he needs some help.
13:49Yeah, we'll just put this on and we can catch the baby later.
13:52In case he wants an ice cake.
13:53He may be scared.
13:55Oh, we can just make a flip.
13:57It's a wrap.
13:58I don't know where.
14:00Oh, my hair, you're jacked on me.
14:04It's a wrap.
14:05Oh, hair wrap.
14:07What are you doing?
14:09What are you doing?
14:10Oh, my.
14:10I've been looking for these shoes.
14:12I'm having a baby, not going shopping.
14:15Put your drone for me, baby.
14:17Will, it's a wrap.
14:19I'm about to have a baby.
14:21I'm coming.
14:22Wow.
14:23I took that girl on the phone.
14:25It's on you.
14:25It's on you, bro.
14:26You gotta get a...
14:27Get a fucking gal.
14:28What do you mean, Mr. Brown, to deliver my baby?
14:37Look, we need you to do this.
14:44I can't.
14:49You ain't got no choice.
14:54You've got to let me go.
14:56Don't you know who I am?
14:59Of course we know who you are.
15:00That's why you gotta do this.
15:02We need you to shake that moneymaker.
15:09Do something strange for some change.
15:14Drop it like it's hot.
15:18Get no work.
15:21Mr. Brown, what do you have on?
15:24Just my baby, birthing gear.
15:27Mr. Brown, I'm ready.
15:30But I'm not.
15:31No.
15:32Girl, what we need to do, you know what to do.
15:33Brown, Brown, Brown, this is your house.
15:35If we were in Vietnam, we'd send out to the rice padders and wait 15 minutes.
15:39Go check on the boiling water.
15:40Hurry up.
15:42Get down to that end.
15:44It's coming.
15:46Girl, I can't get on that end.
15:47The devil is alive.
15:48I'm saying.
15:49I'm not going to be down there.
15:52Stop out that end and just breathe.
15:54Hey.
15:55Oh.
15:56Hey.
15:57Oh.
15:59Oh.
16:00Oh.
16:01Just come on.
16:02Oh.
16:05Oh.
16:06Oh.
16:06Oh.
16:07Oh.
16:07Oh.
16:07Oh.
16:07Oh.
16:08Oh.
16:09Oh.
16:09Oh.
16:10I think I need to push.
16:12No, you need to pull.
16:14No, Mr. Brown, I need to push.
16:16You need to pull.
16:17Mr. Brown, he's coming.
16:19Little man, stay in there.
16:20Ain't nothing out here but death, taxes, and turkey bacon.
16:23Hold on.
16:24Mr. Brown, here he comes.
16:26No, no, no.
16:28Oh, I'm so proud of you, Mr. Brown.
16:36You did such a good job with the baby.
16:37Sure did, Uncle Brown.
16:38What's Tamika and her baby boy doing?
16:40Yeah.
16:41Very well.
16:42Well, I'm hanging out my baby birthing hat.
16:45I don't want to be no midwife no more.
16:47I don't want to be no more OBG.
16:50Why in the world did you have to have this baby here?
16:53Even though you screamed more than me, I appreciate what you did.
16:58Well, thank you.
17:00Tamika, I've contacted your parents, and they're going to be meeting us at the hospital.
17:03Well, you know, they were very worried about you when you ran away.
17:11I'm sorry I lied, but I was scared.
17:14Yes, you're a liar and a deceiver.
17:18Aw, look, he's so cute.
17:20He looks just like you.
17:22Girl, quit lying.
17:26Look at that baby again.
17:27Look at that baby.
17:29That baby ugly.
17:30He looks like he's been working in the cotton fields of Georgia.
17:34Don't hate on me, because people lie.
17:36You ever see somebody walk up to you and say,
17:38Oh, that baby is so cute.
17:40That baby is ugly.
17:43Ugly.
17:44I'm sick of people lying to my babies.
17:46That baby ain't, that baby is ugly.
17:48That baby's face is messed up.
17:49I don't know which in is which.
17:50I start to duct tape his face to his feet.
17:54What do you do then?
17:56Sasha, come check my pulp.
17:58That baby done ran my pressure up.
17:59Check your what?
18:00My pulp.
18:01Your pulse?
18:02Yes.
18:04Mr. Brown, your pulse is fine.
18:06Okay, Sasha, check my cholesterol, too.
18:08Just check it.
18:09That'll take a minute.
18:10Well, check my colon.
18:12That's the wrong end, Mr. Brown?
18:14Well, what you in you talking about?
18:16The devil is a liar.
18:18I haven't been through enough.
18:19A man should never have to see all that I see.
18:21Ooh, that was nasty, Cora.
18:25Oh, what a night.
18:27I tell y'all, it's just been crazy.
18:30Daisy, she's safe.
18:31What have you been?
18:32Oh, back up off me, chick.
18:35What have you been so weird about you, Miss Daisy?
18:37I've been trapping with my homies,
18:39Jeet up and Sugar Low.
18:40We got stacks on deck.
18:44Yo, come on in here and meet my peeps.
18:47Cora, we finna have to fight.
18:49They about to steal up everything.
18:50Get my TV, get my TV.
18:51Hey, and we just a rapper from the 29th Street Mafia, man.
18:55And that's what?
18:57We're her employee.
18:59Miss Daisy's in our new video.
19:01The Granny Snap.
19:02Fresh snap.
19:03Just like it.
19:05Ow.
19:07Ow.
19:10Hey, you did a great job, too.
19:12I'm talking about you a straight-up thug thudspin.
19:14You know me.
19:15I make her do what it do.
19:18He's up.
19:19He's hooked up.
19:20And don't you forget to holler at your girl
19:22the next time you're in the hood.
19:24Yeah.
19:27That means for y'all to go.
19:28Bye.
19:30Buddy, you ain't got to act all crazy.
19:32You ain't got to be acting all crazy up in here, neither.
19:34But you better get...
19:35Step around.
19:36Mr. Brown.
19:37Hold on.
19:37Look at how he dressed, buddy.
19:39You don't run up on nobody like that.
19:40You don't run up on...
19:42I'm a pajama thug up in this piece.
19:44You don't run up on nobody.
19:46Call me for your next video.
19:48You can...
19:50Back.
19:51Back, back, back.
19:51Give me 50 feet.
19:54Daisy.
19:55Why you didn't tell nobody you was gone?
19:59Because I'm grown, biatches.
20:01What?
20:03It's so insane.
20:06Turn your lights coming on.
20:07Come on, Daisy.
20:08It's almost on.
20:09Don't let it start without me.
20:12No.
20:13Here it comes, here it comes.
20:14Here it comes.
20:15Here we go.
20:16Here we go.
20:28It's gonna be a fall.
20:29No!
20:30Well, she's dropping it like it was.
20:32She's dropping it like it's not.
20:33Ha!
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