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TVTranscript
00:31Honey, I'm home.
01:03Chaplain is as important as the howling.
01:06Each month, on the evening of the full moon, every male dinosaur who has come of age,
01:13climbs to the top of the mountain and howls his mightiest howl.
01:18Why?
01:19Why what?
01:20Why do we do this?
01:21We've been doing it for a million years.
01:23Why?
01:23It is written in the sacred book of dinosaur. Well, who wrote it there? Some sacred guy
01:32I don't know that I just don't see it. I mean, what does this have to do with my life?
01:36Well, it says right here
01:37Only by the howling do we defeat the dark spirit which would turn dinosaur
01:42Against dinosaur and bring an end to our days on earth and you buy that
01:47Hey, this book's been around a million years and you've been around what fifteen years guess who wins
01:53Uh, but it just doesn't make sense dad today
01:56I'm just a kid but tomorrow I climb up the mountain and yell at the moon and that makes me
02:00a grown-up
02:01Why because your mother sent out a hundred and fifty invitations and we got a dead rhino and ten tons
02:06of potato salad downstairs
02:08So tomorrow night you are gonna scamper your scaly butt up that hill and howl like a banshee
02:18You haven't been practicing have you been using those eight-track tapes?
02:22I got you oh all the time dad look Robbie
02:25I'm going downstairs, and I don't want to hear any silence coming out of this room all right
02:41Howling at the moon tape one howling for beginners let's start with this simple phrase, okay
02:48Uh, ooh
02:49Uh, uh, ooh
02:51Very good
02:53Thanks
02:53Now try again with more expression
02:56Uh, uh, ooh
03:02Very good
03:06Well, we can't broil it
03:08$4.95 a ton
03:10And it isn't even disemboweled yet
03:14I'm not cleaning this
03:16What do you think mom?
03:1728 hours at 3.50?
03:21Are you dead?
03:23Hello?
03:25In my day it was a solemn occasion
03:27We didn't have all this fanfare and rhinoceros
03:30Mr. and Mrs. Earl Sinclair
03:33And baby!
03:35Cordially invite you to join them
03:37And baby!
03:38As their son Robert Mark Sinclair
03:41Is called up the mountain for his howling
03:44With reception to follow
03:46Oh, my little baby
03:49Hey, I'm your little baby
03:53I'm your little baby
04:03Stay
04:17I'm supposed to sing hard
04:20Hey, hey, hey
04:21Practicing hard
04:22Out of my room Charlene
04:23Oh, come on, let's hear one.
04:24No!
04:25Why not?
04:26Because I said no.
04:27Because you have a wussy howl.
04:29I do not.
04:30Wussy howl.
04:31How'd you like me to bite your head off?
04:32Oh, I'm so scared, Mr. Big Adult Male.
04:35Oh, yeah? Well, check this out.
04:44You gotta commit to it, Rob.
04:45I can't commit to it because I don't get it.
04:48I can only commit to things that make sense to me.
04:50Oh, give me a break.
04:51Hey, a dinosaur's howl is a very personal thing.
04:54You can't just howl in your mightiest howl for no good reason.
04:56Oh?
05:06That's my boy.
05:15Oh, yeah!
05:16Yeah!
05:17That's lunch!
05:19Oh, boy.
05:20Well, Pally boy, seems like only yesterday that Robbie shed his first skin.
05:27It's hard to believe he's going up the hill tonight.
05:30Yeah.
05:30Wait till you hear the howl on this kid.
05:32Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
05:34Hey, uh, hey, Roy, uh, there's something I gotta ask you.
05:38I guess it's no secret that you're my best friend and all that.
05:41Yeah, but I guess you're Pally boy.
05:42And, well, you know, tonight, up on the hill, Robbie's gonna need someone special to present him in his first
05:48howling.
05:48Yep.
05:49Well, Roy, you want to do it?
05:53Oh, I'm visibly moved.
05:56Pally boy, this is such an honor that words escape me.
05:59Roy, can you hold that in a bit?
06:00No, the feelings are just falling out.
06:02It's just your pick-me.
06:04Do you have to do that?
06:05Now, you know me a long time, Roy.
06:07You know why you don't usually go in for that sensitivity stuff.
06:10But, uh, as a listener start in a rumor, I, uh, say, I feel very close to you right now.
06:17Please don't say anymore.
06:19Huh?
06:20You're disgusting me with the way you chew with your mouth open.
06:24Huh?
06:24I'm telling you, I can see your lunch.
06:26And your lunch can see me.
06:28Nah.
06:29How you doing?
06:31Will you tell them it's disgusting?
06:32Hey, listen, listen.
06:33I hate to be critical, but I'm gonna have to agree.
06:35And let me tell you, you got one major plaque buildup back here.
06:39Huh?
06:40Oh, jeez, swallow it.
06:42Spit it out.
06:43Do something.
06:43Oh, yeah, make up your mind.
06:44Oh.
06:45Whoa.
06:46Oh, man, do I need a shower.
06:48Earl, you hurt my feelings and embarrassed me in front of my lunch.
06:53Would it be so hard to close your mouth while you're eating?
06:56Would it be so hard to close your eyes while I'm eating?
06:59Just get your open mouth out of my line of vision.
07:02Well, shut your eyes.
07:03Shut your head.
07:04Shut your eyes.
07:05Shut your head.
07:06Earl, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, there, Pally Boy.
07:09This is not a time for petty bickering with young Robbie Boy going up the hill tonight.
07:14Yeah, you're right.
07:16I don't know what I was thinking.
07:17So, see you tonight at seven, huh?
07:20Make it a quarter to seven.
07:21You're always late.
07:24And wear something nice.
07:27Hey, you don't like the way I dress?
07:41This one for me?
07:43No, no, dear.
07:43That's not for you.
07:45Oh, this for me.
07:46No, no, dear.
07:47All of these are Robbie's howling gifts.
07:49None of these are for you.
07:51Oh, this for me.
07:53Friend, I'm home, I'm hungry, and I hate everything.
07:56Not the mama.
07:57Ah, neither are you.
07:59Robbie got lots of new gifts today.
08:02Ooh, more $4 pen and pencil sets.
08:05Big whoop.
08:07Earl, it's traditional.
08:08It's cheap.
08:10You'd think on this, the most important night of my son's life, my friends could do a little
08:14better than a lousy pen and pencil set.
08:16Is something bothering you, Earl?
08:18Bothering me?
08:19No.
08:20After 27 years of friendship, you'd think I could tell a guy he eats like a pig and dresses
08:24like a slob without him getting all uppity about it.
08:27But I'm not going to let it bother me.
08:29I got a family that loves me, and that is what's important.
08:34Who do you love?
08:35Mama.
08:37Who do you love second best?
08:39Mama.
08:40All right.
08:41Who is talking to you right now?
08:44Nothing.
08:44Who is talking to you, Mama?
08:45Yeah.
08:47I'm going upstairs.
08:50Ma, is it me or is Daddy in, like, a really bad mood?
08:54No, your father just gets cranky like this before howling.
08:57They all do every month.
09:00It's pre-howling syndrome.
09:03P.H.S.
09:05I'm so glad I'm a girl.
09:08La-la.
09:11Congratulations.
09:12You're now ready to howl with confidence.
09:14Knowing that you'll not only make your family proud, but keep our civilization from coming
09:19to an end.
09:24Oh, God, who am I kidding?
09:28Okay, kid, it's showtime.
09:31Dad, I got a real problem with this.
09:33Hey, my little howler is nervous?
09:35Come here.
09:36What are you going to do?
09:38I'm going to tell you a little something that my sweet old dad told me just before I went
09:43up the hill.
09:43Great.
09:44I remember he said,
09:46Earl, unlock that bathroom door.
09:49Huh?
09:50Of course, that doesn't apply here, but you get the gist.
09:54Uh, yeah.
09:59Dad, we've got to talk about this.
10:02No, no, no.
10:03First we all howl, then we all talk.
10:06We've been doing it that way for a million years.
10:08Guys, come on.
10:09Come on.
10:10Come on.
10:10You think so?
10:10Come on.
10:11Hey, guys.
10:13Hi, hi, yay.
10:14Yeah.
10:14Hi.
10:15Yeah, yeah.
10:15Let's howl and get on to the settlement of grievances.
10:18Good, because I want an apology for that turtle head remark.
10:22Hmm?
10:23No way.
10:24Hi there, Robbie.
10:26Hi.
10:26Here's just a little something to help usher into adult malehood.
10:30Oh, wow.
10:32Huh?
10:34Well, looky here, a pen and pencil set from my oldest and dearest friend.
10:39What a wonderful, highly original, well-thought-out gift.
10:43Well, thank you.
10:46Well, tonight is a very special night for a young dinosaur I've known for many years.
10:52Yeah, that's fine.
10:52I'll take it from here.
10:53But I thought you wanted me to introduce the little guy.
10:56I changed my mind.
10:57Jeez.
10:58All right.
11:00Everybody, you know my son, Robbie.
11:02Yeah.
11:02Robbie, there's the moon.
11:04Hit it.
11:06Um...
11:07I, uh, I, I, I, I've been giving this a lot of thought.
11:11And, and this howling thing.
11:15Well, uh, I don't believe in it.
11:22Robbie, everybody's looking.
11:23I mean, think about it logically.
11:25The book says, dinosaur will turn against dinosaur and bring an end to our days on Earth.
11:30Now, how would not howling at the moon bring an end to our days on Earth?
11:33Because if you don't howl, I'll kill you.
11:36What could possibly happen?
11:39Earthquake!
11:40Flood!
11:40Plagues!
11:41This isn't the Dark Ages.
11:43This is 60 million B.C.
11:45Now, why don't we try not howling one time?
11:48Nothing's gonna happen.
12:00It's the end of the world!
12:05Wait!
12:06Wait!
12:07Wait!
12:11Oh, rabbit!
12:29Do you hear something?
12:31No.
12:31What?
12:32Shhh!
12:33Hello, rumbling.
12:35Huh?
12:35Like the Earth is getting ready to open up and swallow us.
12:38Don't you hear it?
12:39It's the ice maker.
12:40Quiet, you!
12:41You brought about a cataclysm against all life on Earth, and I don't want to hear any more out of
12:45you!
12:46Okay.
12:47Are we dead yet?
12:48No, dear.
12:52When are we gonna be dead?
12:53Very soon, dear.
12:55My flashlight went out.
12:57I think the batteries are dead.
12:59Dead!
12:59They're dead!
13:00It's starting.
13:01The batteries are always the first to go.
13:03Earl, come here.
13:04Let me tell you something.
13:05What?
13:06What?
13:07Get a hold of yourself!
13:12You're right, Ethel.
13:13I am the guardian and protector of this family.
13:16And it's my job to be a calming influence while we huddle together hopelessly in the dark.
13:22Dad, why don't we just keep the lights on?
13:24The lights work?
13:27Yep.
13:27Hey, all I am trying to do is create a mood here.
13:30Earl?
13:31What?
13:32I'm going to be very disappointed if this world ends and you and Robbie are still angry at each other.
13:37He destroyed the universe!
13:39Any parent can forgive the little things, Earl.
13:41It's these big things that test us.
13:44All right, all right.
13:46I forgive you.
13:48So you brought about the end of everything.
13:50So what?
13:51Sorry, Dad.
13:52Yeah, it's all part of growing up.
13:55Okay.
13:57Now, these are our last few hours on Earth.
14:00I want us to spend them being together and loving each other.
14:04And realizing that the most important thing in the world is being a family.
14:16Should I turn on the TV?
14:18Yes!
14:20Good.
14:21As you know, the end of the world is upon us.
14:25And that means...
14:26You say big!
14:27Values galore here at Discount Charlie's!
14:29Yes, we're selecting high prices!
14:31Best refrigerated freezer, $13.99.95!
14:34Now, two for a dollar!
14:36So come on down!
14:37We're dealing like there's no tomorrow!
14:58No, no, no, no!
15:15Look at that.
15:20The sun came up.
15:22It's another day.
15:24Wow.
15:26Are we dead?
15:27No.
15:28You promised.
15:31Look.
15:32See, Dad?
15:33The world didn't come to an end.
15:35Give me that.
15:37Okay.
15:37Now, maybe we should look at this as a new beginning.
15:39You know, the entire dinosaur community has been reborn.
15:43And maybe, just maybe, nothing will ever be the same again.
15:45The Antidiluvian Broadcasting Company now begins its broadcast day.
15:51Real love!
16:00Hello there, friend.
16:02Oh, hello, Roy.
16:04Isn't it wonderful the world not ending and all?
16:06Yeah, I suppose so.
16:08Something I can do for you?
16:10Well, Earl, if the world had ended last night, I could have overlooked certain things.
16:14But unfortunately, it didn't.
16:17So I've come from my beach, Dongs, and I've bought peanut ham of your porridge.
16:21I'd ask you to return all of the food you've eaten here, but most of it fell out of your
16:24mouth before you left.
16:27Hey, Roy.
16:28Huh?
16:29Oh, hi.
16:30Hiya, Robbie.
16:31Don't you talk to my kid like that.
16:33Huh?
16:33I'll talk to your kid any way I want.
16:35Hiya, Robbie.
16:36Hiya, Robbie.
16:37Hiya, Robbie.
16:38Hiya, Robbie.
16:38Hiya, Robbie.
16:39Hiya, Robbie.
16:39Hiya, Robbie.
16:40Guys, come on.
16:40Dad.
16:43Uncle Roy.
16:44Well, guys, what's happening?
16:47You've been best friends since before I was born.
16:50Can you talk to me now?
16:53I'll, uh, think that as a no.
16:56Earl, get your head out of his mouth right now.
16:59He started it.
17:01Oh, look at him talking with his mouth full again.
17:05Roy, if you bite my husband's head off...
17:14You ever come near my house again, I'll feed you to my family.
17:17Yeah, then I won't.
17:19Good.
17:19Fine.
17:20Fine.
17:21Good.
17:31Only by howling do we defeat the dark spirit,
17:35which would turn dinosaur against dinosaur.
17:45And many wonder if this rash of incidents
17:47is connected to last night's missed howling.
17:49In the meantime, there seems to be no end in sight
17:52to the violence and general crankiness among males.
17:54Now, here's Dwayne with sports.
17:56Oh, great, great, great.
17:57Throw it to me with 30 seconds left.
17:59Ha!
18:00Ha!
18:00Ha!
18:01Ha!
18:02Ha!
18:03Ha!
18:04Ha!
18:04Come here, I'll bite you a little leg off.
18:06Hey, Dad, Roy just called.
18:08There is no Roy.
18:09He wants to return all the stuff he borrowed from you
18:11over the years, but he says he won't set foot in our house again.
18:14So, where does he want to meet?
18:22Well, right away, I see my barbecue apron is missing.
18:25I thought the barbecue apron was a gift.
18:28It was a gift for a friend.
18:29So, I want it back from you.
18:32Hey, hey, hey.
18:33Roy, Roy, Dad, come on, stop it.
18:36Well, he's the one who called me up here.
18:38I did not.
18:39You called me.
18:44Uh, look, I have to call you up here.
18:46You have to howl.
18:47I wouldn't howl with him if he was the last dinosaur on Earth.
18:50But, uh...
18:51Besides, there's no reason to howl anymore.
18:53Yes, there is.
18:54Look, I didn't understand it before, but if you don't howl, terrible things happen.
18:58No, they don't.
18:58The world didn't come to an end.
19:00Nothing bad happened at all.
19:02You're not friends anymore.
19:03A lifelong friendship is about to end.
19:05Isn't that bad?
19:06No.
19:06Oh, that's good.
19:08Okay, fine.
19:09Maybe I was wrong.
19:11After all, Dad, a best friend wouldn't say you had a wussy howl.
19:16Did you say that I had a wussy howl?
19:19Uh, I don't know.
19:20Did I?
19:21Oh, absolutely.
19:22Yeah.
19:23Well, then, I stand by it.
19:24Wussy howl?
19:26Oh, yeah?
19:26I can howl you under the table any moonlit night of the week.
19:30Oh, yeah?
19:31Yeah.
19:32Well, you're right.
19:33All right.
19:56And after the howling, we set all our grievances.
19:58Now, you two best friends for 27 years got anything you want to say to each other?
20:02Yeah.
20:05Listen, all this stuff you borrowed, you can hang on to it for a while.
20:12Thanks.
20:12Because there's really nothing left in my apartment now, anyway, except for your barbecue apron.
20:17I'm sorry I gave you a hard time about the pen and pencil set.
20:21I know that wasn't too original, but I don't have any kids of my own, so I wanted Robbie to
20:26have the pen and pencil set my dad gave me on my howling day.
20:32Roy, your dad gave you this?
20:34Yeah.
20:35It's the one his dad gave to him on his howling day.
20:42Oh, jeez.
20:51You're my best friend.
20:53Buddy, come on over for dinner.
20:57Oh, come on.
20:58Yeah.
21:01Oh, uh, Robbie.
21:04Yeah, Dad?
21:05You did a good thing here.
21:07Ah, thanks, Dad.
21:09You know, sometimes it's not important to understand why you do something.
21:13I howl because I believe in it.
21:21I don't know why I believe in it.
21:23I just do.
21:25I understand, Dad.
21:27Yeah.
21:27Okay, I'll see you at home.
21:30Okay.
21:31Bye.
21:32Hey, Earl.
21:33What about my stuff?
21:35The kid will get it.
21:36That's why you have kids.
21:37Hmm.
21:38Maybe I should get one.
21:40Ha, ha, ha.
21:48Only by howling do we defeat the dark spirit, which would turn dinosaur against dinosaur and bring an end to
21:55our days on Earth.
21:59Oh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
22:08ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
22:08ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
22:08ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
22:08ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh,
22:19ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh
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