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00:00Man and Ronnie's favourite.
00:05It's easy to get it out of your finger, you get it a lot more.
00:09I like it using my finger.
00:11You are joking.
00:12You get more on it.
00:16You're disgusting.
00:21It gets in the corners, you think, better than this.
00:24Are your fingers in Sherwood?
00:26Yeah.
00:27They need to be.
00:33I don't like that.
00:34Well, I'll tell you what they have.
00:38Oh, Barcelona.
00:41No, I don't like that this guy's trying to tell me how to eat my dinner.
00:45A what?
00:45Fault fetish.
00:47I had no idea that was a thing.
00:49Remove my britches.
00:50Expose your loins.
00:51I like that.
00:54Oh, Ronnie.
00:56This is weird.
00:57He's a mercenary bugger, isn't he?
00:59This is why I don't date.
01:00His heart is dancing with the devil.
01:02Oh, no.
01:03He suffers for his heart, doesn't he?
01:04Clearly.
01:05A Bentley Continental!
01:07I think I'd rather call it a day, Natalie, wouldn't you?
01:10Who's been arrested now and for what?
01:14In the week Artemis 2 splashed down in the Pacific after popping to the moon and back, we enjoyed lots
01:21of great telly.
01:23Gordon Ramsay was giving restaurateurs a rollicking on Channel 4.
01:27I've seen everything and I am shocked.
01:31That's a traditional Greek food.
01:33That's not traditional Greek food.
01:35There's nothing traditional about that, hon.
01:37No, you've been caught.
01:39One time, you know, I wasn't going to school and I decided to go to Asda instead.
01:43What a choice.
01:43And I forgot my auntie worked there so I hid behind a bag of Doritos.
01:48Attenborough was peering over garden fences again on BBC One.
01:53She will need to eat all she can to produce enough milk for her hungry youngsters.
02:01Did you know that hedgehogs were lactose intolerant like you?
02:03No, I didn't know that.
02:05That's crazy, isn't it?
02:06How random is that?
02:06So what milk must they produce then?
02:09Well, their milk must not have lactose in it.
02:10Lactose-free milk, yeah?
02:11Lactose-free milk, yeah.
02:12You might have some hedgehog milk soon.
02:14No, thank you.
02:16And things were looking shifty on Discovery.
02:19Now you can open your eyes and look at your hands.
02:24But here's the catch.
02:26Not everyone can be hypnotized.
02:28I'm cynical already, so probably I wouldn't be.
02:30No, I don't think so.
02:32I don't know that.
02:32I think you'd strut in cynical and you'd come out and go, where are my trousers?
02:45In Wiltshire.
02:46So what happened was, Giles, that two irons, one after the other.
02:51Irons?
02:53Caused fusing throughout the cottage yesterday while you were gardening.
02:57And I wasn't there.
02:58So now I'm going to take this off, put in a new fuse.
03:02I've got the right number.
03:03Giles and his wife, Mary.
03:06What could I have done?
03:07You see, if you go online...
03:09Let me hold it.
03:10You might be giving it bad vibes.
03:15Don't drip water out of it.
03:17Hold it upright.
03:18Something's happening, Mary.
03:19It's squirting.
03:20Well, that's because you're pressing the squirter.
03:23Hold it up.
03:23I'm pressing the squirter.
03:25Hold it upright.
03:26Norris McSquirter.
03:28Oh!
03:29Oh!
03:30My God!
03:31What happened?
03:32Oh, no.
03:32It's broken.
03:33The whole bloody system.
03:34The whole cottage is...
03:36Oh.
03:36Did I do that by squirting?
03:38Yes, it must be your fault.
03:39For God's sake, Giles.
03:41This week, we were navigating the rocky road to love on Netflix.
03:46I think we're all on the spectrum.
03:47Well, I'm definitely borderline ADHD.
03:49I know I am.
03:50And Julia certainly is.
03:51ADHD?
03:53Oh, she's...
03:53OCD, you mean.
03:55That's right, OCD.
03:56Get your Ds right.
04:00Yeah, you see, when you had your first date with Ben,
04:03I just remember you coming back and not shutting up about him.
04:06And that is when you know that somebody is mint.
04:09Yeah.
04:10You know, thinking, what the hell, even I want to shag him.
04:15Hello.
04:16Hello.
04:17I'm Logan.
04:18I'm 25 years old.
04:2025.
04:21That's prime time.
04:22We've got the same hairstyle, Logan.
04:23Yas.
04:24Yeah.
04:24Can you tell me about your dating history?
04:26Oh, dating history.
04:28Hmm.
04:28It has been zero.
04:31Oh, pretty lacklustre.
04:34Oh, this is his first date then I've expected.
04:36I just want somebody who dresses nice.
04:39Oh, yes.
04:39Smells good.
04:40Yes.
04:41That's curvy straight hair.
04:43Oh, quite specific on the hair.
04:45Curvy straight?
04:46Yeah, what's curvy straight hair?
04:47Is that like a wave?
04:48Uh, okay.
04:49I'd hit that brief.
04:54Look at that.
04:55A bunch of red roses.
04:57How classy.
04:58You can do this.
04:59You can do this, Logan.
05:00He doesn't seem ready at all.
05:02He's not ready.
05:02You can.
05:03We're behind you.
05:04You absolutely can do this.
05:07Who's this beauty?
05:09Who's this?
05:10Logan is meeting Hayley.
05:12Oh, she's lovely.
05:13She's lovely.
05:14She likes hockey players fighting.
05:17Oh, so do I Hayley.
05:19That should be in every sport.
05:22And men in suits.
05:24Men in suits?
05:25Yes.
05:26All he has to do is twat someone with a hockey stick and he's sorted.
05:31Hello.
05:32Oh, how beautiful.
05:34Hi.
05:39I'm Hayley.
05:41And I'm Morgan.
05:42Nice to meet you.
05:43Oh, Logan.
05:43You should have got up, mate.
05:45Never mind.
05:46Never mind.
05:51No, the poses are taking me up.
05:53Yeah.
05:53Like I said.
05:55Oh, I'm Morgan.
05:56Did I mention that?
05:57Hi, Hayley.
05:58He's nervous, though, isn't he?
05:59You've got to give him a chance.
06:01He'll warm into this.
06:02Yeah.
06:02I wish he'd give her the flowers.
06:03That was beautiful.
06:03It might break the ice.
06:04I work at it at school as a food service worker.
06:07Serve to the students, perfect food, all kinds of stuff.
06:12Oh, well, tell me more about this.
06:14Oh, nice one.
06:15Yes.
06:16Good, good, good.
06:16Now you're talking.
06:18Come on, Logan.
06:19I'd love it if I had a girlfriend that was a dinner lady and they could bring like all the
06:23leftovers home.
06:25And what is your favourite like to do?
06:28I like to crochet and I like model trains.
06:31Oh, he likes to crochet?
06:32I like model trains right up my street.
06:34I could have a conversation with him.
06:36I've got the flying Scotsman model set at home.
06:38You have?
06:42Oh, he's died.
06:43He's died to death.
06:44He's all good silence, Julie.
06:46Come on, Logan.
06:46Say I brought you the flowers.
06:50Oh, my goodness.
06:52Oh, she's struggling as well now.
06:55What is...?
06:57What are my favourite things?
07:00Logan, are you going to help her out a bit or nah?
07:02It's like she had a list of questions and she's gone through them in a minute.
07:06Yeah, she has.
07:07And now she's stuck.
07:08Yeah.
07:09Are those...?
07:10Oh, I'm so sorry.
07:12Yes!
07:13Oh, she's looking at the flowers.
07:14I mean, these are for you.
07:16Oh, thank you.
07:18Aww.
07:20Things are looking up, aren't they?
07:22Yes.
07:23What is your favourite TV show?
07:26Hannah Montana.
07:27A lot of people teased me before and say it's for little kids and I don't care what they say.
07:32Well done for not caring what they say.
07:34Aw, dude, just, you like what you like.
07:36I was obsessed with that show.
07:38Well, sometimes if people are really mean to me, they make fun of me, think about me.
07:42I'm sorry that really, that happened.
07:45Ooh!
07:46Oh, he's mirrored in her language as well.
07:48Well, Hayley, just, just, just, just remember, if you need some, if you need a friend, I'm always here for
07:55you.
07:56Aw!
07:58He's cementing it in.
07:59I'm your friend.
08:00My heart!
08:02I gotta say, um, Hayley, you look really nice today.
08:06Aw!
08:08He looks relaxed!
08:10I thought he was like...
08:11That is aged.
08:11He's a little gent, isn't he?
08:13He's a gent.
08:14He's going for it.
08:15I like that blue jacket.
08:17Mm-hmm.
08:18Figured you would.
08:20I figured you would, yeah.
08:21He knows what he's doing, yeah.
08:24Look how cocky he is.
08:25He'd gone from, like, shy to like, yeah, I knew he would.
08:28You ready to go?
08:29Yeah.
08:30Let's go.
08:32This is so sweet.
08:33You know, I had a lot of fun, um, did you?
08:38Yeah, I do.
08:39I really like you a lot.
08:42Mostly.
08:43Mostly.
08:46Yeah, Mel said that to me countless times.
08:48No, mostly.
08:49Mostly, yeah.
08:50Mostly is how she finishes.
08:52Yeah.
08:52Most a compliment.
08:53Not 100%.
08:53Yeah.
08:54Would you like to go on another day with me?
08:56Aw!
08:57What was she gonna say?
09:00Please.
09:01I would like to go on another day with you.
09:04Aw!
09:05Woo-hoo!
09:09It's very nice to meet you, Logan.
09:10It was nice to meet you, too.
09:12Bye.
09:12Hayley.
09:13Take care of yourself.
09:14Bye.
09:14It's charming, isn't it?
09:16Absolutely.
09:18Yeah!
09:19Yes, Logan!
09:20Let's go, Logan!
09:22You did it!
09:22Oh, you loved that!
09:23Josh, do you think we fell in love so quick like Logan and Hayley?
09:28You did.
09:29You cheeky bastard!
09:31When did you first know you'd fallen in love with Percy?
09:34It wasn't like a bolt of lightning.
09:36It's something that grew.
09:38Yes, which I think is more sustainable.
09:40Yeah.
09:40It grew over the years.
09:42Yes.
09:43And?
09:45And that was that.
09:47Aw!
09:48That's sweet.
09:50That's adorable.
09:52Aw!
09:56In Blackpool.
09:57How are my two little pals, my niece and nephew?
10:00Aw, they're alright.
10:02Don't get me wrong, I love them to bits.
10:04Yeah.
10:04But, they just smash everything up like they don't treat anything with respect.
10:08Pete and his little sister Sophie.
10:11You know, I suppose the beauty is, and you're quite, you're quite lucky that this is a bit of a
10:16shithole anyway.
10:18Oh, you cheeky bastard!
10:20What?
10:22No, it's good, because then at least you say, you don't have to put it right, do you?
10:28On Tuesday night, Gordon Ramsay had something new for us from across the pond on Channel 4.
10:34Overall, I think it's a good sort.
10:37I wish she was Prime Minister.
10:38Don't be so silly, Giles.
10:40It makes me think you should be sectioned when you say things like that.
10:44That's the sort of thing a toddler would say.
10:47When restaurants see me coming...
10:48Oh my God.
10:49Uh oh.
10:50Oh, hell no.
10:51They cover up their problems.
10:52Oh, they all panic when they see Gordon.
10:54Yeah, because nobody wants an ass tanning from Gordon.
10:58I've seen enough.
10:59So now, I need to go undercover.
11:01Oh, he's got a covert band.
11:03007 Ramsay in here.
11:05Exactly.
11:05With the help of my insider, keep your head down and speak the truth.
11:09I'll restore the restaurant.
11:10Let's get cooking.
11:10From the inside out.
11:11So basically, somebody's tipped off Gordon to say that we're working in a shithole.
11:17You're like a snitch, aren't you?
11:18Yeah.
11:18You're doing it for the right reasons.
11:20Yeah.
11:20But you are dobbing all your demons.
11:25Yeah.
11:25Isn't this just like Kitchen Nightmares except he's outside in a van?
11:28Yeah, but you can't say that.
11:30It's a secret service instead.
11:32Okay.
11:32Let's all pretend like it's not that then.
11:38One o'clock in the morning.
11:39Gordon go to sleep.
11:40Oh, James and Joe have been to Washington, haven't they?
11:43Yeah, they have.
11:44I'm on my way to Parthenon.
11:46Now this restaurant's been a staple Greek restaurant in the neighbourhood for years.
11:50Oh, he's undercover.
11:51He's got a cap on that changes everything.
11:53My insider left me a key.
11:56It's not that undercover when you've got 20 film cameras there either.
12:00James, come in.
12:01Quick, quick.
12:02Get in.
12:03Get in.
12:03Get in.
12:03How's he getting in there now then?
12:05Well, he knows you've had instructions from his informant.
12:10Oh, my goodness, Nick.
12:12Oh, my God.
12:14Gordon's gone in with his UV light.
12:17I don't know actually what he's looking at, but I'm assuming...
12:19But it doesn't look good.
12:20It's bad.
12:21I don't think this thing's been cleaned for months.
12:23That is so gross.
12:24Look at that.
12:25Look at the fat.
12:27I was always brought up, though.
12:28What you don't see, you don't miss.
12:30No.
12:31Oh, boy.
12:32This is a bandsaw.
12:34A bandsaw?
12:35In a restaurant?
12:36No, no, no.
12:37What in the design technology is this?
12:39These are so old-fashioned.
12:41Mate, that's dirty.
12:42Oh, look at that.
12:43That's disgusting.
12:44This is like his wet dream.
12:46A filthy man, so...
12:48That is disgusting.
12:49Now, this is an ATP test.
12:51Oh!
12:51See, Ellie, I've tried to buy one of these machines before.
12:54I've seen it on obsessive compulsive cleaners.
12:57This is gonna give me an indication of live bacteria.
13:01Some bacteria's healthy, you know.
13:04Er, some bacteria's healthy, Jenny. That'll look a killer.
13:07Under 30 is acceptable.
13:09A dirty toilet seat will go to 1,400.
13:12This is going to be higher than a dirty toilet.
13:15Surely not.
13:16Oh, my goodness.
13:195,550.
13:21Fucking hell, love.
13:22Five times dirtier than a toilet seat.
13:24Yeah.
13:24Wow.
13:28Just quick comms there, check.
13:30Oh, look at his setup.
13:31That's amazing.
13:32Look at him.
13:33Jenny, I bet he doesn't know what the fuck he's doing in there.
13:35It's just like a game boy to win.
13:37Guys ready to go?
13:39That's Pete the owner there.
13:41Pete, you're gonna be in trouble, mate.
13:42You know what you should have on the tables?
13:45It's coffee cups.
13:47That is Susie, Pete's wife.
13:50Oh, it's a family affair then, this business.
13:52Susie looks well put together.
13:54Susie looks like she's a clean lady.
13:56Why is that kitchen not clean?
13:58Shit.
13:58This is what I swapped last night.
14:00Oh, look at him.
14:01He's cutting the lamb chops on that banter where all the bacteria was.
14:05It's all flavoring.
14:07Oh.
14:08I've seen enough.
14:09I'm on my way.
14:10Stand by.
14:11Stand by.
14:12Oh, here we go.
14:13I think Gordon's just gonna storm in there and be like, right.
14:15Yeah, shut this restaurant down.
14:19Holy.
14:20Oh my God.
14:21Look at everyone's eyes.
14:22Everyone's like, dear in the headlights, isn't it?
14:24That's not me.
14:25I cannot believe what I've just been watching.
14:28We try our best.
14:29We try our best.
14:31We try our best.
14:32Your best ain't good enough.
14:33I've seen everything.
14:34And I am shocked.
14:36That's a, that's a traditional Greek food.
14:39Stop.
14:40No.
14:41I think any Greek person would go, don't associate me with that.
14:46And do you know what really shocks me?
14:47A bandsaw.
14:49When was the last time that was cleaned?
14:50I don't know.
14:51Oh, I don't know.
14:52He don't know.
14:53Should be every day, twice day, after every time he's been used.
14:58Breaking news.
15:00We're screws.
15:01We're screws.
15:02Like that.
15:02He's with them.
15:03Yeah, yeah.
15:04Yeah, yeah.
15:04Not your screws.
15:05He's not against them.
15:06Just wake up.
15:07It's tough love.
15:09Wow.
15:10A bit later, after the restaurant was given a new look.
15:13Oh my.
15:14And the kitchen is now fully equipped with brand new chopping boards, incredible knives,
15:19pans, you name it.
15:20Look at that.
15:21That is a real makeover, isn't it?
15:22They've got loads of free shit.
15:24They've got merch.
15:25It's worth having a dirty kitchen.
15:26There's one more thing I need to talk to you about.
15:28Quite seriously.
15:29Gordon was ready to reveal who the grass was.
15:32Would the insider reveal themselves?
15:36Who's the fucking insider?
15:37Who's the little snitch?
15:39Come on.
15:39Who's the insider with me?
15:41Oh!
15:41Why?
15:42Why?
15:43Typical UC women who've got these stubborn husbands.
15:46They have to go behind the scenes and take in outsiders to help them.
15:51Thank you, Chef Ramsay.
15:53Without you, this would never have happened.
15:56He's a national treasure.
15:57I say national treasure.
15:59Not many people know that.
16:00The Scottish roots.
16:01Yeah.
16:02Used to play for Rangers.
16:02Used to play for Rangers.
16:03Yeah.
16:04And he also hurt his knee, like myself.
16:07Ah, yes.
16:08An old Gordon Ramsay prodigy.
16:09But I can't cook or play football, so...
16:11You know?
16:12And he's got stuff that I can do that he can't.
16:14Which is?
16:15Use the air fryer.
16:24In the Cotswolds.
16:26My God, darling, I can't believe that I actually can now say that I've also survived a scorpion attack.
16:32Andrew and his husband, Alfie.
16:34Yeah, well, I found it in the bathroom, and with my bare hands, killed it.
16:39You did it with your bare hands?
16:41Well, I didn't do it with my bare hands. I put a bit of tissue paper off.
16:44I thought you had a shoe or something.
16:45No, no, no, no, darling. I did then use the bin in the bathroom, the wicker one, to sort of
16:51finish it off.
16:52What a hero.
16:53Yeah, but you're lucky that they don't like that.
16:55It might be the most butch thing you've ever done.
16:57On Sunday night, Attenborough was keeping it local on BBC One.
17:02You love a nature documentary.
17:04Yes.
17:04It's your absolute favourite. You perk up, you come all alight like a lightbulb.
17:08I haven't got no secrets in my garden.
17:11Neither have I.
17:11I've got a bit of grass, I've got a lovely, gorgeous tree.
17:15I've got a shed.
17:16I've got...
17:17Just what everyone else has got.
17:19Welcome to a hidden world, right on our doorsteps.
17:23He's 100 next month and he's still grafting.
17:25State of the economy, Pedro.
17:27Yeah.
17:27He wants to collect his eating on, he's going to have to keep grafting.
17:33That's what my garden looks like.
17:35Does it?
17:36I think your garden looks better in the dark.
17:38Well, yeah.
17:39I've got some lights on my bush just at the end.
17:43As dusk falls, most residents of the garden hide away.
17:49Oh, let's see who comes out at night.
17:52But this is the time when one of them begins to stir.
17:57Who's this?
17:58Don't know.
17:59Once, there were over 30 million in Britain.
18:0230 million what?
18:03What is it?
18:04Bees?
18:05Birds?
18:06Well, but today, fewer than a million remain.
18:09What is this animal?
18:10I'm going frog.
18:12Bye now.
18:16What is that?
18:17What is it?
18:17Tell us what it is, man.
18:19What about moles?
18:19We used to have loads of moles, didn't we?
18:21Yeah.
18:24A hedgehog.
18:25I love hedgehogs.
18:26Yay!
18:27It's a Mrs Tiggywinkle.
18:29Well, I'll tell you something.
18:30Round us, the badgers have eaten the whole lot.
18:35Hedgehogs.
18:36You know, I'd say my granny grander, I think every night they've got like five hedgehogs that visit them.
18:40They've got little houses set up and it's called Hedgehog Village and they put food in it.
18:44So, they're keeping at least five of the one million going.
18:48After five months in hibernation, this female is raring to go.
18:54Is it mating season after the old hibernation, is it?
18:57And so, it seems, are her fleas.
19:01Oh.
19:03Nothing that a quick scratch can't fix.
19:08Oh, I can't get my leg up that high.
19:11I'd just be riddled with fleas.
19:13SHE LAUGHS
19:16She needs to be at her best tonight.
19:20Oh, where you going, girl?
19:22She ain't mating someone. Date night, this.
19:25Because she's looking for a mate.
19:28Hedgehog sex tonight, Julianna, yeah?
19:29Oh, don't.
19:30Well, how do you have sex with something prickly like that?
19:34The problem is, as the only hedgehog in a walled garden...
19:39Oh, no, she's in a walled garden.
19:41She's hardly spoiled for choice.
19:44Well, it's need fucker around.
19:47That's why they say to have hedgehog highways in gardens now.
19:50But Lou and her neighbours have made a small change
19:55that goes a long way to help.
19:58Oh, there, that must be a hedgehog highway.
20:00They've opened it all up so they can intermingle.
20:04Mmm!
20:06Fraternise, even.
20:07Opening up her dating pool to 16 gardens.
20:13She's about to cop off in one of them gardens, isn't she?
20:1716 gardens.
20:19And what do you know?
20:21Oh, yeah.
20:22Oh.
20:23Bingo.
20:24Something smells very promising indeed.
20:28Oh, there's a fella.
20:31A male.
20:33Oh.
20:34Sauntering him round the pot.
20:36Look at him.
20:37Fine specimen.
20:39What?
20:40Yeah, I know.
20:41Too invested in this.
20:42Yeah, you are.
20:43He, too, has been attracted by her musky odour.
20:48He maybe likes that in a woman.
20:50Full of fleas and stinks.
20:55Here we go.
20:56Oh, he's a mountaineer.
20:58And, of course, he takes care.
21:02If you're a hedgehog, love can really hurt.
21:06All right, Billy Ocean.
21:11She's got what she wanted.
21:13Quick, how's your father?
21:14And it's back home to bed.
21:15Solid.
21:16But rather than head back to bed,
21:19she is making the most of her big night out.
21:23She's looking for more lads?
21:24No.
21:25She's not having another one, is she?
21:27Jesus Christ.
21:29And she mates with not just a second partner.
21:33What?
21:34But a third.
21:35Oh.
21:37Easy.
21:37In one night.
21:39Well, the random thing.
21:41So a single litter may have multiple fathers.
21:47Eh?
21:48What?
21:48Oh, wow.
21:51It's a way of ensuring genetic diversity among her young.
21:57Use whatever excuse you want, love.
21:58Yes.
22:00That's what you tell the children.
22:02Yeah.
22:02Yeah.
22:03You know, we hear noises in the night.
22:05Oh.
22:06Out there.
22:07It could be a hedgehog gangbang.
22:10Going on at the end.
22:14In Bristol.
22:15So when you play football, you don't run?
22:16He don't run.
22:18I don't run.
22:18But you run like 5k twice a week.
22:20Of course.
22:20You're not mobile on the pitch.
22:21Because you're there.
22:22Nah, I've heard that.
22:24Oh.
22:24Brothers Tremaine, Twain and Tristan.
22:27Trem, this is what don't make no sense.
22:28Surely you'll be pushing yourself in the games, innit?
22:31Is that not the point of running 5k twice a week?
22:34So you can run as much as you need to on a football pitch?
22:36Yeah.
22:36I've run, I only run, when I was younger, I used to chase lost causes and run down the channel.
22:42But now, and now I'm older now, what am I running down for?
22:44We're talking about football, not relationships.
22:46That is.
22:49On Saturday, tough nut Ross Kemp was back on his bridge again on BBC One.
22:54So I've got quite a nose for a liar.
22:57Hmm.
22:58I know a liar when I know, yeah.
23:01Sniffs them out.
23:02I don't know if I can tell if Toy's lying to you.
23:04Twain waffles.
23:04Does it?
23:06Yeah, you get sheepish.
23:07Yeah, I just like...
23:09You get that.
23:09Yeah.
23:10That is it.
23:11This is Celebrity Bridge of Lies.
23:14Where winning is simple.
23:16For you it is.
23:17In the programme, TV's Matt Baker had a go on the bridge.
23:22Oh, we like Matt Baker from Countryfile.
23:24Bridge.
23:25What are we looking for?
23:28Film titles missing animals.
23:30Film.
23:31Oh, I'm good with films.
23:32I'm not.
23:32I'm trying to think of films that I know only one is 12 monkeys.
23:36That's the one I can think of.
23:39The Something of Wall Street, Leonardo DiCaprio.
23:43Oh, The Wolf of Wall Street, Kung Fu Panda.
23:46Kung Fu Something, Jack Black.
23:49Classics.
23:50See, now you remember certain films?
23:52Yeah, no, I do now.
23:53Yeah, yeah, yeah.
23:54Yeah, yeah, yeah.
23:54Tod Monke's way.
23:56LAUGHTER
23:59Left or right are The Wolf.
24:01Which way do I want to go?
24:03Truth or Lie?
24:04Feeling this way.
24:06That is the truth.
24:07Very easy start on the Bridge of Lies, though.
24:09I will say that.
24:09It starts getting a lot harder.
24:11I might have to go this way, actually.
24:14Yeah, I think I'm going to go this way.
24:15Truth or Lie?
24:16No, Matt!
24:17No, it's going to another right answer, so it'll open up something else.
24:21Yeah, OK, it's going to another right answer.
24:23Dangerous Something, Glenn Close.
24:25That could be Dangerous Dogs.
24:27Sounds good, doesn't it?
24:28Dangerous Liaison, isn't it?
24:30Oh.
24:3112 Something, Brad Pitt.
24:34What's the Brad Pitt one?
24:3612...
24:36Monkeys.
24:37Is it?
24:38Are you wondering?
24:39Is Brad Pitt in there as well?
24:40It is.
24:41Oh, wow.
24:42How crazy is that?
24:44Well, this one is a great film.
24:46That's 12 Monkeys.
24:47Time's a ticking, Matt.
24:48Peek one.
24:49I'm going on this one.
24:49Truth or Lie?
24:50It is 12 Monkeys.
24:52It's got monkeys.
24:53Yeah, stop.
24:53You're giving me an old life story.
24:55Just step on the bloody thing.
24:56That opens up.
24:57Pelican Brief.
24:58The Mighty Something, Emilio Estevez.
25:01The Mighty Ducks.
25:02The Mighty Ducks.
25:03Oh, yeah!
25:03The Mighty Ducks!
25:04Go Mighty Ducks!
25:05Coach Bombay.
25:07Something Box, Sandra Bullock.
25:10Bird Box.
25:11Bird Box with Sandra Bullock.
25:14Yes, Bullock!
25:14Bird Box.
25:15That's a really good film.
25:16Have you seen it?
25:17It's not that good.
25:18It's not that good.
25:19Yes, it is.
25:20It's not that good.
25:20It's really good.
25:21It's really not that good.
25:22That opens up.
25:23Kiss of the Something Woman, William Hurt.
25:25Kiss of the Elephant Woman.
25:28Kiss of the Spider Woman.
25:30The Men Who Stare at Something, George Clooney.
25:33Two minutes for me.
25:33Women.
25:34The Men Who Stare at Women.
25:37The Men Who Stare at Goats.
25:39Is it?
25:40Goats?
25:41Yeah, I know it sounds a bit bizarre.
25:42I'm sure it is.
25:44Red Something, Jennifer Lawrence.
25:47Red Squirrel up the top left, is it?
25:49I...
25:50No.
25:51What is it then?
25:52I don't think it's Red Squirrel.
25:55Something Man, Jim Carrey.
25:58Something Man with Jim Carrey.
26:00Oh!
26:00Animal Man, Jim Carrey.
26:02I'm sure it is.
26:04No.
26:07Something on a hot tin roof, Elizabeth Taylor.
26:11Man on a hot tin roof.
26:13That's cat on a hot tin roof.
26:14Oh, is it?
26:15Oh, I thought it was man.
26:19Cat on a hot tin roof is Elizabeth Taylor.
26:21How the fuck do you guys know this shit?
26:23Because it's old shit.
26:24Because they're old.
26:24Why is a cat on a hot roof?
26:27War something, Jonah Hill.
26:30War horse!
26:31War horse!
26:31War dogs.
26:32Oh, yeah.
26:33War dogs, Jonah Hill, Miles Tower.
26:35They're selling guns.
26:36It's War dogs.
26:37There you go.
26:37Come on!
26:38Truth or Lie!
26:39Yeah!
26:40War dogs!
26:40War dogs!
26:42Come on, we're nearly at the end, Matt.
26:44The Little Something, Betty Davis.
26:46The Little Beaver.
26:47The Little Beaver.
26:49The Little Beaver.
26:49Oh, go on, Betty Davis.
26:51The Little Fox.
26:53The Little Something.
26:54Truth or Lie.
26:56Is it right?
26:56Is it right?
26:57The Little Foxes.
26:59Yes!
27:00Yes!
27:01Oh, foxes.
27:02Oh, yeah.
27:03Oh, you said fox.
27:03I know, but...
27:04Sorry, there was more than one.
27:06Yeah, but it doesn't matter, does it?
27:07Wrong!
27:07Not wrong!
27:08The Green Something, Seth Rogen.
27:10It's between the Green Something and the Green Something.
27:13The Green Giant.
27:15Yeah.
27:16Oh, that's the guy.
27:17There's the peas.
27:19Sweet corn, yeah.
27:20Sweet corn.
27:20Green Giant.
27:21You've got a 50-50.
27:22You've got 18 seconds.
27:24Oh, come on!
27:25There's only...
27:25You've got to go!
27:26Come on!
27:27Just jump.
27:27Just jump, you silly little man.
27:29I think it's a green parrot!
27:32Truth or Lie!
27:33Oh, shit!
27:34Is it right?
27:34Come on!
27:35It's a truth!
27:37Yes!
27:38Yay!
27:40Yay!
27:41Yay!
27:41She's done it!
27:42He winged that the way I did with my...
27:44CV?
27:45...fairy test.
27:46I didn't do any practice for my ferry.
27:49I just randomly put ones and I passed it.
27:52That's nice to know when we sat in the passenger seat shown, to be honest.
27:55Yeah.
28:03In Leeds.
28:04So, when you're getting into summer, I'm like, alright, I need my feet doing.
28:07I need to get all the hard skin off my feet.
28:09I need to get all my skin sorted.
28:11Do you know what I mean?
28:11There's stuff to be done now.
28:12The sun's out.
28:13Best friends Danielle and Daniella.
28:15My feet need doing.
28:17My neck, my toenails are that long.
28:19They're busting through my socks.
28:20I know, I saw.
28:21Oh, man.
28:23Pterodactyl claws out here, man.
28:24We need to sort ourselves out now.
28:26100% glow up.
28:27It's glow up time.
28:28Operation glow up.
28:29Yeah, agreed.
28:31Start with my hair fever.
28:32How about that?
28:33And your beard.
28:35On Friday night, tantalising questions were being answered on Discovery.
28:41Oh, I love a conspiracy theory!
28:44Do you think everything's a conspiracy?
28:47Somebody was telling me that we've all got colds at minute because the government's been spraying stuff in the sky.
28:52Really?
28:53That's why we've all got same symptoms.
28:55No.
28:56Let's face it.
28:57We live in a time when fear and distrust are at an all-time high.
29:01Oh, don't we?
29:02Do it.
29:03Yeah, you're right.
29:03I mean, I trust nobody.
29:05Since leaving CIA, I've made it my mission to shed light on the lies, cover-ups, conspiracies, and tactics used
29:13to conceal them.
29:14Oh, here's a whistleblower.
29:15I like that.
29:16Yes, I love this.
29:18Help me separate fact from fiction.
29:24Is this program even real?
29:26Exactly.
29:27Maybe.
29:28Maybe this is a conspiracy theory cover-up in itself to actually take our minds away from what they want
29:35us to believe.
29:37When Thomas Crooks planned his shot on then-presidential candidate Donald Trump, he was looking at that in the distance
29:44on a stage.
29:45Oh, we're going straight in for the grays on the air, Donald Trump.
29:49Oh, yeah.
29:49Yeah?
29:50The assassination attempt.
29:51Who was he?
29:52What drove him?
29:53And was this 20-year-old acting alone?
29:5620-year-old acting alone?
29:58Hmm.
29:59Sounds a bit sus to me.
30:00Maybe Thomas Crooks wasn't just some angry young shooter, maybe he was part of something more sinister.
30:07A pawn under the control of the deep state.
30:10So basically what they're saying is, has he been mind controlled so that he wants to go and shoot Donald
30:17Trump?
30:17There's been loads of films about this.
30:19Yeah, brainwashing people.
30:21Cruciatus curse on Harry Potter.
30:23And you can just sleep deep all the way down.
30:26Max Major is one of the country's leading hypnotists.
30:28You watch this guy, he's unbelievable, and he touches you, and you're gone.
30:32Do you know what I think out, Claire?
30:33He's being hypnotised as well, you know.
30:35That's shame.
30:36You'll have to ask her, yeah.
30:37That's why I think he's going to be my perfect partner on this mission.
30:41I like what they're doing here.
30:42This makes sense to me.
30:43Yeah, I can... I can...
30:46Hypnotise, plant the seed, this is what we want you to do, send him back out there.
30:49Not everyone can be hypnotised.
30:52Some people struggle to focus and resist letting go of control.
30:55That's my control freak.
30:57Yeah, you can't trick me!
30:58You can't trick me!
31:00You're not happening!
31:01But Max isn't trying to hypnotise everyone.
31:04He's looking for the few.
31:05The few who can give up that control.
31:08I would say basically gets the easiest ones to influence.
31:11He's almost searching for a preg.
31:13Yeah.
31:14You know, who are the weak ones in the pack?
31:17Yeah.
31:17Having identified the most suggestible candidate...
31:20And Clyde...
31:23...is following orders right now.
31:26Oh God, he's very programmable.
31:27Clyde.
31:28Clyde is going to be the guy.
31:29Yeah.
31:30We've got cameras covering everywhere.
31:32It was time to carry out the experiment on him.
31:35This brain teaser exercise is like an anchor point.
31:38What the subject will be asked to work on before and after delivering the poison.
31:42The poison?
31:43So now they're going to hypnotise him to poison people without knowing he's done it?
31:47Yeah.
31:48And as this hand starts to come in, you'll notice your eyes change focus.
31:50And when you notice your eyes, you can just sleep deep all the way down deeper.
31:53Oh my God, did you see how quickly he went out like a light?
31:57How can you like take over someone's mind like that?
32:01A mirror on my head!
32:02Oh, sorry.
32:03What the hell?
32:04You'll walk over to the table in front of you.
32:06You'll take the glass bottle out of your pocket.
32:09Surely not.
32:10Yes, 100%.
32:11I believe this.
32:13You'll open it up and you'll dump its contents into the glass of water on that table.
32:18As if it was spiking someone?
32:20That's a lot of instructions.
32:21Look, yeah!
32:21That's what I was going to say!
32:22I'd wake up from here.
32:24Sorry, what was that?
32:30Oh, there's the glass.
32:31Here we go.
32:32Let's see if this goes according to plan.
32:37When you use that click, though, that's his cue.
32:42A sugar packet?
32:44Up, you guys.
32:47Stop it.
32:47Oh, my God, you're joking.
32:54No.
32:55He's doing it!
32:56He's actually doing it!
33:00I can't believe that.
33:02That he's just got up and put the contents of the glass bottle in the water.
33:05None the wiser that he's done it.
33:07I don't think he is.
33:09Now for a little drama where we really test the limits of this experiment.
33:13She's going to kill over now.
33:14Oh, he's going to start pretending to be poisoned!
33:21Oh, damn!
33:22Andrew went to drama school.
33:23Look at that.
33:24Who is that?
33:25Oh, look at him!
33:27Cloud doesn't remember doing it.
33:29He's shocked to look and say, oh, what's happening?
33:30I mean, if that is real, that's really frightening.
33:33Did you see what happened?
33:34I know you were doing the...
33:35I just heard him collapse, that was it.
33:38He's just poisoned someone.
33:40He hasn't, technically.
33:41Clyde has just poisoned someone.
33:43What he could have done in real life.
33:44And unfortunate for you, Clyde, you're now going to prison.
33:49Is he actually?
33:50No!
33:50No!
33:51Dad, honestly, when we were growing up, people were like,
33:53medicine this, lawyer that, accountant this.
33:56You should have been saying hypnotist, shouldn't you, man?
33:58I should have.
33:59I know, granted, we didn't do any of those things you asked us to do.
34:02But still, I think we would have been hypnotists.
34:09In Leeds...
34:10What breed of chicken are there, do you know?
34:12Yeah, the marrons.
34:14Oh, my God.
34:16I only put a bloody kitchen roll at the bottom of my clean towel basket.
34:20Cost me 12 quid, that.
34:22Sisters Ellie and Izzy.
34:25What colour are they?
34:26So, they're gonna be grey, they'll be silver.
34:29Oh!
34:31So, the chicks have cracked in my towel basket, cracked on my tray and now they're eating it.
34:42Crying out.
34:43Oh, my God. It's bleeding everywhere.
34:46You'd rather them crap on there than crapping your towel basket, wouldn't you?
34:49I'd rather them not crap anywhere, to be honest.
34:51I'd rather them not have bird poo all over my house.
34:54Oh, look at them!
34:57On Friday, something big was making the headlines on the BBC.
35:01Wagging a tail for the news is fudge, she loves it.
35:05God, I've never known a dog love the news so much.
35:11I can see the tape.
35:17Now, since retiring, Steve Wainwright from Peterborough started to think big, making supersized versions of everyday items as a hobby.
35:25God, man, when you retire, you lose your mind.
35:28You know, honestly, I want to get to that part of my life.
35:30Because you start doing this.
35:31You've got nothing else to do.
35:33Yeah.
35:33Yeah?
35:34Just make big stuff.
35:35After retiring as an ambulance technician, Steve Wainwright was busy with the household chores.
35:40You know why he's doing this? Because his wife will have made a list of jobs for him today.
35:44Yeah.
35:44And he'll be going, oh, sorry, I can't, you know, fix the curtain pole because I'm making a big screwdriver.
35:49Yeah.
35:50But then he started to think big. He had an idea to make household objects.
35:54Look at him with his fingers and his acting!
35:56I love this.
35:57He should have gone into acting, not making big stuff.
36:00He wants them after this, lad.
36:02In his shed, larger than their actual size.
36:06I love tinkering at garage and at shed.
36:08Do you?
36:09Oh, yeah.
36:09Or at greenhouse.
36:11Just love tinkering.
36:12Just love fucking around, basically.
36:15I went out into my garage, which was my workshop, picked up a three-pin plug and thought,
36:19I'm going to make this, but ten times its size.
36:22Why?
36:23For what reason?
36:24What could you make ten times bigger?
36:29He's now getting one of the biggest plugs ever on TV.
36:32Oh, God, this is too cheesy.
36:34It took him two and a half weeks to make, and it's designed as a cupboard.
36:39Oh, isn't that charming, Mary?
36:41That week I stood on two plugs, one on each foot, and I couldn't walk.
36:45I do remember that very clearly.
36:47When they got infected, I had to go at the walk-in.
36:48Imagine standing on that fucker.
36:50The first time I saw the plug, it was out at the front of the garage,
36:53and I reversed the car back up the drive, and it was just sitting there.
36:56And I said, what the fuck is that?
37:00And it's just, he had to laugh.
37:01Or cry.
37:03She's going to do one of them.
37:05He's sharpened up his incredible DIY skills to make a huge pencil.
37:11Nah, I'm dying, he's actually hating with the big pencil.
37:15Right, his next idea's down there.
37:18Made from a garden stake.
37:20Go on, Steve.
37:21That's the thing, when you retire early, you've got to fill your days.
37:25Yeah.
37:26You know, he's making big shit, he could have turned to drink and drugs,
37:29but at least, you know, he's just making big shit.
37:32His attention to detail is incredible.
37:33He's constantly sizing up the situation.
37:36He's just wandering round his friggin' house with big items.
37:40Imagine being his neighbour.
37:42What are you making today, Steve?
37:43Just a fucking massive spanner.
37:53I had to go for my first ever boob measure in my whole life.
37:57Can't say I've been to one of them.
37:59You don't want to go for one, it was so awkward.
38:01She said, do you want me to step out the room while you get changed?
38:04She said, no, I couldn't give her monkeys, it's only a tit.
38:08Yep.
38:08Best friends Abby and Georgia.
38:11I wouldn't do that.
38:13I've got to 26 without having to do that, I'd just guess.
38:15Yeah, but guessing, she said, because I've been guessing for 25 years,
38:20she said the bra I was wearing has been lying on my tissue
38:25where the duck pellets are.
38:28Duck pellets?
38:30What's it called?
38:33Where you breastfeed.
38:35Duck.
38:36Your ducts.
38:38Ducts.
38:39Boob ducts.
38:40Not duck pellets, but duck food.
38:43She said my bra's been lying on my, what's it called?
38:47I don't actually know.
38:49On that.
38:50And it can cause issues if you want to breastfeed.
38:53So now I've got bras that'll fit and be perfect if I ever want to breastfeed in the future.
38:58And not hurt my duck feathers or whatever you call it.
39:05This week, it was a creepy bestseller turned into a movie keeping us on our toes.
39:10Oh, I'm excited by this, Natty.
39:12I didn't know this had been made.
39:15This is the book I've just been listening to.
39:17Oh, well done.
39:17I feel like the movie's going to be better than the book.
39:20Don't you think?
39:21I doubt it.
39:21I doubt it.
39:22Books are always better.
39:23But then you'd never know because you don't read.
39:26I'm not illiterate, you know that, right?
39:28I don't know what you see is what you get so...
39:32Sydney Sweeney.
39:33Yeah?
39:34Big Trump fan.
39:36Wow.
39:36What, her?
39:36Yeah.
39:40Oh, is that outside Waterstones?
39:49Oh, that's gorgeous.
39:50They've even got their own roundabout.
39:52Wow.
39:53I love my own roundabout.
39:55I'm just going to say I think you might be overqualified for this job with all this experience and a
39:59college degree.
40:00No, I know.
40:01I just realise I really enjoy being a housemaid.
40:04She's got all them degrees and she still wants to be a housemaid.
40:07Why can't she get a proper job?
40:08You're going to think it's a little bit small, but it's got a lot of privacy and we figured that
40:13that was the most important thing.
40:14Oh, this is going to be her real looking after.
40:17Well, does that mean that she's got the job then?
40:19Ta-da!
40:20You can make it your own, of course.
40:22Oh, well, yeah, I'm in.
40:23I'm sold.
40:23Come on.
40:24That's lovely.
40:25Yeah, that's nice, that.
40:26It's perfect.
40:27Okay, good.
40:28She likes it, Mary.
40:29It was definitely described a lot worse in the book.
40:31That's not too bad.
40:33Oh, here we go with the book.
40:35This is what I hate watching with book readers.
40:46They've got scratches all round it.
40:47Looks like it, Simon.
40:49Ultimately...
40:49Oh, trying to get out.
40:50Oh.
40:51Oh, do you think they'll lock her in on, eh?
40:56Lock on the exterior.
40:57I wouldn't be liking that.
40:59I thought somebody would be able to lock me in that room.
41:01And that's where you're at the top, top, top floor.
41:03You can't even jump out.
41:04Yeah, and you can scream as much as you like, but nobody can hear you.
41:09What?
41:10What's going on here?
41:12Nina.
41:14Where are they?
41:15Oh?
41:15What?
41:16The last time I seen someone in the fridge like that, it was Sean.
41:18Where are what?
41:19My PTA notes?
41:20Well, they're not going to be in the bloody fridge, Nina, are they?
41:23It could be in this house.
41:25I've found my phone in the fridge before.
41:27It could be anywhere, actually.
41:29Hey!
41:30He's happy.
41:31Come on, calm her down.
41:32What's going on?
41:33Billy!
41:34Threw away my notes for the meeting tonight.
41:36Martin Oli, we sniff it around on his top.
41:39Yeah.
41:39Where's the rest to take that?
41:40Come on.
41:42It's okay.
41:45I'd be pretty freaked out now, right?
41:47Well, what, if you're Millie?
41:48Yeah.
41:49Definitely, man.
41:50Yeah.
41:51A guy who can deal with my crazy, psychotic self.
41:54That's a win right there.
41:56And with arms like his?
41:59Yeah, he's staying.
42:01Later, having asked Millie to pick up some tickets for a show on Saturday,
42:05Nina went off on one again.
42:08What is this?
42:09Uh-oh.
42:09An envelope.
42:10They're the Broadway tickets.
42:11The hotel reservation.
42:13For Saturday?
42:14Yeah.
42:14It's what you asked for.
42:16But why would I have you book tickets for the day that I'm driving Cece to Arts Camp
42:20in D.C.?
42:21Why would I do that?
42:22Oh, stop it.
42:23No, she said, Nina said Saturday.
42:25Don't do that.
42:26Is this butter?
42:28Oh, my days.
42:29Nina, I did what you asked me to do.
42:31Fine.
42:31They're gonna come out of your paycheck.
42:34Oh, my God.
42:35Oh, she's gaslighting, Ellie.
42:37Fucking gaslighting her?
42:38What's that?
42:38I don't even know.
42:41Nina, that's more than I have saved.
42:43Hey.
42:44Andrew to the rescue.
42:45What's wrong?
42:47Millie booked tickets for a non-refundable weekend for us that we can't even use.
42:52Yeah, Millie.
42:53Get a grip.
42:54You don't have to pay for anything.
42:58I'm sorry.
43:02What is going on here?
43:04The vibes are vibing.
43:07With Nina away from home, Andrew came up with a good idea for the tickets.
43:12Okay.
43:12Well, just, um, how about you and I go?
43:14Ba-ba-ba-boo!
43:16Woo!
43:17Hello.
43:18I thought this might be leading up to something like that.
43:22Yes.
43:22Ah.
43:23And one thing led to another.
43:25I know that you fucked her.
43:27Ah!
43:28Nina, I don't know who you are.
43:31Ooh.
43:32I would like you to leave.
43:34Oh, really?
43:35To his wife!
43:36You can't do that.
43:38No!
43:39Ah!
43:41Whoa.
43:41Oh!
43:42Oh!
43:44Oh!
43:46Oh!
43:49Where's Nina going?
43:50That's a bit of kind of fine fascination.
43:52She doesn't care at the moment, Simon.
43:56Oh!
43:57Oh, no!
43:58So you call a quick, a sub, just after half time?
44:03Yeah.
44:04Just like that.
44:06Single bed.
44:07All up house and they've gone for the single bed in the loft.
44:10Don't look, Steve.
44:10Don't look.
44:12Ready?
44:15Straight in her face!
44:18You broke my nose!
44:20You fucking idiot!
44:31What's this now?
44:32Where's she at?
44:33Rough night.
44:34Has he drugged her?
44:37Oh!
44:37What happened to the room?
44:39Oh, shit.
44:40How long's she been out?
44:41Well, where's the kettle?
44:42There was a kettle there, wasn't there?
44:43She can't even make a cup of tea.
44:51No!
44:52And that's why he had a lock on the outside.
44:55Andrew, can you hear me?
44:56Can you let me out?
44:57I will.
45:00Just not yet.
45:01What do you mean?
45:03What?
45:03What?
45:04Why?
45:04Why, why, why, why, why, why, why, why?
45:07What?
45:08What are you talking about?
45:09Andrew, open the door.
45:12Andrew!
45:13Where's he going?
45:14Andrew, go back!
45:20What?
45:21I think Andrew did that with Nina and that's why they're all scratch marks on the door.
45:29Oh, oh, mad laughter.
45:31That's happiness.
45:33That's happiness.
45:33Is she laughing?
45:34Yeah, that's happiness.
45:35Why is she laughing?
45:36Because she's escaped.
45:40Oh, my...
45:41She planned the whole thing.
45:42Oh, my God.
45:43Let's get the hell out of here.
45:44Oh, the pennies dropped.
45:51So, she was Millie in Millie's position.
45:56Oh, my God.
45:57And she's had to recruit the replacement.
46:00Right.
46:02You know what?
46:02This just goes to show you should never trust men.
46:06Especially the ones with beautiful, piercing blue eyes like that.
46:09And arms like that as well.
46:10Yeah.
46:11You must be lovely, innit?
46:13You know what I mean?
46:14Finally think, oh...
46:16Yeah.
46:16I'm free.
46:18Yeah.
46:19It would be, wouldn't it?
46:21LAUGHTER