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00:25To be continued...
00:30This will be all, yeah.
00:35What is it, Ian?
00:36Phil, your work on this new dancing game is great.
00:39That disco ball effect that you suggested for mythic dance
00:42is really going to make it sing.
00:44I didn't suggest that. You suggested that.
00:47Huh. I must have been inspired by my new earrings.
00:50You see how they dance and glitter?
00:53You told me you didn't need anything else for mythic dance, Ian.
00:56Yeah, sorry. Phil, let's take this opportunity to learn a lesson
00:59from the earrings.
01:00Fucking earrings.
01:01The pressure that we're under right now
01:03is what's going to make mythic dance
01:04turn from a lump of coal
01:06into a hand-cut eight-carat diamond
01:09in a white-gold setting.
01:11Great.
01:11Look, I know it's your day off, and I just...
01:13It's not my day off. I'm on vacation.
01:15I don't even know I'm talking to you right now.
01:17You're talking to me because you know that
01:19Japan is a quarter of the market,
01:20and the Minister of Culture has to allow it
01:23through the country, and you know...
01:25Hey.
01:26We're dancing because it's my tie o'clock.
01:29It's my tie o'clock.
01:30You just hung up on iron.
01:32Yeah, I know. I'm saying buy an iron.
01:33It's vacation.
01:34I'm sorry.
01:36You're right.
01:36We haven't had one in two years.
01:38I'm not going to let your work thing ruin it.
01:39And your weirdly yoked, bargain bin,
01:42chris angel-ass boss
01:44can survive one week without you.
01:46He's going to have to,
01:47because as of this moment, Maude,
01:49I am officially free from Mythic Quest.
01:52Oh, Phil.
01:53Our vacation starts...
01:55Order one set.
01:57Our vacation starts...
02:00not...
02:13Oh, what a cutie boy.
02:16Hello.
02:18Hi.
02:19I have traveled these great lands.
02:22I went even to the far north,
02:24to the spa area,
02:26where I did encounter
02:27some wild children
02:29who tried to claim
02:30what was ours.
02:32You may share my bedbrain hero.
02:35Yes, please.
02:36Hoppin' stud.
02:37Oh, yes.
02:38Oh, thank you.
02:39Did you say,
02:41Hoppin'?
02:41Oh.
02:43You are so crazy.
02:45Mwah.
02:47You're so welcome.
02:49Oh, shit.
02:50I forgot my dairy pills.
02:52I'm going to get the wet toots.
02:54Know that I keep
02:54my lover's suits bone dry.
02:56Oh, shit.
02:57Bastard.
02:58Ah, remember that,
02:59because I'm going to show you something.
03:02Oh, my God.
03:03Ma, we have talked about this.
03:05No.
03:05He's so cute.
03:06Look at his stupid little face.
03:08His dumb little naked-ass body.
03:11I love you, Daddy.
03:12I love him so much.
03:14I miss Mommy.
03:15I can see.
03:16He's very cute.
03:17But I, I mean,
03:18we just don't have the space,
03:19and I feel bad adopting Milton
03:21and not having a backyard
03:22for him to run around in.
03:23Okay, so maybe it's time
03:24that we look for a house.
03:25All right.
03:26Well, let's think about this.
03:27What if we get locked into a mortgage
03:29and you come home with,
03:31I don't know,
03:32Colin Firth?
03:33I wouldn't dump you
03:34for a calm lesson, Farrell, honey.
03:37I'd dump you.
03:38Hmm.
03:39Hmm-hmm.
03:40Have you looked under your plate?
03:41Okay, the menu.
03:44Yeah.
03:44See what they have for dessert.
03:47Oh, my God.
03:49Bug.
03:51So good.
03:52I love it.
03:53You just looked so beautiful.
03:55I just had to capture it.
03:56I know it's a little cheesy,
03:57but...
03:58It's not cheesy.
03:59It's so good.
04:02When we get back,
04:03you have to quit,
04:04and you have to start
04:04the design suit in the garage
04:05like you always say
04:06that you're going to.
04:07Well, I mean, right now,
04:08our townhouse's shared garage
04:10is full of that CrossFit asshole's
04:12tractor tires.
04:14But, you know,
04:15I am just bullshit
04:16when I say all that stuff
04:17about I am,
04:18because, you know,
04:19he's pushed me very hard,
04:21and he's made me good.
04:22I wouldn't have been able
04:22to draw that without I am.
04:23I'm lucky you have him.
04:24Okay, he's lucky.
04:26If I am going to do
04:27what you do,
04:27then he would.
04:28And maybe he did
04:29make you better, okay?
04:31But whatever.
04:32It's time that you just need
04:33to bet on yourself
04:34and do it.
04:37This is so good.
04:39Hello?
04:40Bill, micro, knuckleball,
04:42knucks, house,
04:43the world's greatest art director.
04:45Need to talk to you
04:46about the Japan presentation.
04:49It was Ian.
04:51How does he know
04:52what hotel we're at?
04:54Oh, shit.
04:56Ian has all of his employees
04:58share location.
05:00Are you insane?
05:02Okay.
05:02Yeah, no.
05:03We're not doing that.
05:05That is kookalicious.
05:07All done.
05:08We have taken the tracking chip
05:09out of your neck.
05:10You're welcome.
05:12Guess I should have done
05:13that a while ago.
05:15Well, it's okay.
05:16I got you, bug.
05:19Keep doing that.
05:20I like it.
05:23Dreamer, I'm just a dreamer.
05:27Some say, I'm just wasting time.
05:33Oh, no, no.
05:40It's not worth talking.
05:41Okay.
05:42That's really good.
05:43Look at the stairs,
05:45so you're looking at that
05:46and not remembering it.
05:47Okay.
05:49Tell him what I said.
05:51Good job.
06:08Good job.
06:11On the inhale,
06:12switch positions
06:13with your partner.
06:15Jesus Christ.
06:16Is that your badge?
06:18It's like a goddamn
06:19bag of lions, Phil.
06:22How long have you two been married?
06:24Oh, we're not married.
06:26Oh.
06:26Now one partner
06:27lie on your belly
06:28while your lover
06:29stands over you
06:30gently pulling your wrists.
06:32Well, I think
06:33you're just adorable.
06:34It seems like
06:35you've been together forever.
06:36It's been a little
06:37over three years, so.
06:39Okay.
06:40Well, you must be
06:40pretty special.
06:41I mean, a girl like her
06:42could get anyone, you know?
06:46A girl like her
06:48could get anyone.
06:49A girl like her
06:50could get anyone.
06:51She could have anyone.
06:53Ow!
06:53Oh, my tits fell.
06:55Sorry, Mom.
06:56So, let's move in
06:57to Supta Budakunasana.
06:59I'm sorry.
06:59Oh, excuse me.
07:01Okay.
07:01Hello?
07:04My apologies.
07:06Is there a Phil here?
07:08This is Phil.
07:09I'm here.
07:09Hi.
07:10It's apparently
07:10an emergency.
07:13Someone's on the phone?
07:15Hello?
07:15Is that your phone?
07:17Philando Carrician.
07:18Before you ask
07:19how I got this number,
07:20I have access
07:20to military satellites.
07:22Anywho,
07:22I need a dozen mock-ups
07:24or some hats.
07:25Some hats?
07:26Yep, yep.
07:27I realize what's missing
07:27is some old-school
07:28Fred Astaire razzle-dazzle.
07:31You're the only man
07:31to do it.
07:32You're my guy.
07:33Now, if you can get
07:33those hat options
07:34by seven,
07:36that'd be awesome.
07:36Look, if I send you
07:37a few sketches,
07:38will you leave me
07:39the fuck alone?
07:39No, absolutely.
07:41Phil, turn it off.
07:43We're strengthening
07:43our pelvic floor
07:44right now, right?
07:44Okay, I gotta go on.
07:45Is everything okay?
07:46Yes, I'm sorry.
07:47Please continue.
07:49Namaste.
07:50Danka.
07:51Ari got to.
07:54What?
07:55What?
07:59This sunset
08:00is so fucking beautiful,
08:02I could die.
08:03This sunset
08:04is so fucking beautiful,
08:06I can, like,
08:07punch a dolphin.
08:10Sunset is so beautiful,
08:11I could, like,
08:13rip my own leg off
08:14and eat it out.
08:18Aw.
08:19We're so cute.
08:21I'm so happy
08:22I'm here with you.
08:24That it's just you
08:26and me.
08:27But someone's missing.
08:29Who?
08:31Jamilton.
08:32Oh, my God.
08:33Did you make him
08:34your lock screen?
08:35Yeah.
08:36Momo.
08:37Momo.
08:38Someday.
08:39Someday.
08:45Oh, a proposal.
08:47Right there.
08:49Woo-hoo!
08:51And it's another proposal.
08:54Oh, my gosh.
08:56Skywriter.
08:57She could have anyone.
08:58She could have anyone.
09:00Girl like her
09:01could get anyone.
09:02Why would she want me?
09:04Why would she want me?
09:05She could have anyone.
09:06Why would she want me?
09:07Aloha.
09:08My apologies for the delay, sir.
09:10Here's your main course.
09:12I pooped better husbands than you.
09:14Ah!
09:15Oh, shit, Phil.
09:17Are you okay?
09:21I'm fine.
09:22I just...
09:24hate soup.
09:47You're the greatest art director
09:49that I've ever worked with.
09:51Okay.
09:51Every little movement had a meaning
09:54And the meaning promised a thrill
09:58With your lovely wood, I hand you whisper
10:01Here I love you and I always will
10:15What are you doing, what are you doing, Bob?
10:17Oh, nothing.
10:18I was...
10:19The ocean looks so beautiful
10:20I just needed a draw.
10:22It's black as shit out here, Bob.
10:24You can barely see the ocean.
10:25It is.
10:28Let me see it.
10:29I want to wait till it's finished.
10:30Phil?
10:31I want to wait till it's finished.
10:32Phil?
10:35Is that a pork pie hat on a fucking dwarf?
10:38What?
10:39Cool.
10:40So you're working right now.
10:41No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
10:43Well...
10:43That's my own dwarf hat thing.
10:45Oh, it is?
10:46Yeah, it is.
10:46And just so you know,
10:48That is a hamburg, not a pork pie.
10:50We're on vacation, Phil.
10:51We're supposed to be here to reconnect, relax,
10:54not draw little outdated hats for little fairy creatures.
10:58But if I don't do some work now,
10:59all I'm going to be thinking about
11:01is all the extra work I'm going to have to do
11:02when we get home,
11:03which would cancel out all the relaxing time.
11:06Phil, you're wound tighter than ever.
11:07You screamed at soup.
11:09Let me just do three hats,
11:11and then we'll be done.
11:13It's always three hats,
11:15or 20 swords,
11:16or a bigger, shinier codpiece for a freaking troll.
11:19Do you really not want to be here with me, Phil?
11:22Oh, no.
11:23Come on.
11:23I don't have to waste my time.
11:24Hey, hey, hey.
11:26Of course I want to be here.
11:28There's no place I'd rather be.
11:31For real.
11:34Then tell Ian to leave you alone.
11:38He's my boss.
11:39Phil, I have been so understanding about your job.
11:42I think that I played pretty cool
11:44when I heard about the whole Jason Bourne tracking you thing.
11:47I am done.
11:49So you need to call him right now,
11:53or I truly swear to God I'm going home.
11:57It's pretty late L.A. time.
11:59Oh, my God.
12:00He's probably not going to pick up, but I'm calling.
12:03Hello?
12:04Hi, Phil.
12:05Fuck.
12:05Hey, I am...
12:07I am some tigers and bears, I'm mine.
12:11What?
12:11Sorry, never mind.
12:12I got to talk to you about something.
12:14I hope it's something about goblins wearing big old top hats.
12:17It's not.
12:18I'm on vacation with my girlfriend,
12:21my very beautiful, wonderful, understanding girlfriend.
12:28And I'm not asking you.
12:30I'm telling you,
12:32you do not talk to me until I get back.
12:37Wow.
12:38Okay.
12:39Yeah.
12:39I can respect that.
12:40Boundaries.
12:41All right.
12:42I'll see you when you get back.
12:46I just told Iron Grimm to fuck off.
12:52You should have told him to go up his own asshole,
12:54and then quit.
12:56That was pretty good, though, right?
12:58That was pretty good, Buck.
13:00Fuck yeah, it was.
13:06Oh, holy shit.
13:08Oh, fuck.
13:26It doesn't get much hotter
13:27than the traditional Samoan fire knife dance.
13:30But now let's cool things down a bit
13:32with a little hula.
13:34For this one,
13:35we're going to need a few guests
13:35to come up on stage and learn to hula.
13:39Who do we have here?
13:41Would you like to learn to hula?
13:42Uh, we're Kim and Dan Rutherford
13:43from Cedar Point, Ohio.
13:45And yeah, yeah, let's do it.
13:49Oh, God.
13:51No.
13:53It's okay, honey.
13:54I don't think she's coming to our table.
13:55What's your name, sir?
13:57Would you like to come up
13:57and dance hula for everyone?
14:00In front of all these people?
14:01Um.
14:01No.
14:02No.
14:03You can't do this.
14:04My name is Phil.
14:05Phil.
14:06And, uh...
14:08You know what?
14:09Hi, I'm Maude,
14:10and I would love to hula.
14:12So let's do this!
14:18Welcome.
14:24I'll pass the village of Kawaku
14:29Where the sugar mill peacefully lays
14:34From the park.
14:49Oh, I'll pass it to the river.
15:14Ma, you are the greatest thing that's ever happened to me.
15:21Will you take my hand as I lead you to the promised land in this holy...
15:32Why am I getting religious?
15:33Um, Momo.
15:37What's that?
15:38Oh, nothing. I'm just very excited for our romantic-ass stroll on the beach.
15:44Hey, y'all.
15:53How do you feel?
15:55Are you sure you're ready for this, dum-dum?
16:04I don't know. I mean, I love Ma to a very large degree.
16:10Wow, very convincing. Gonna put that in the proposal?
16:14I don't know.
16:15Phil, buddy, let's put our cars on the table, hmm?
16:18She's gonna figure out sooner or later that you're not good enough for her.
16:21Then it's gonna be clear sailing for old Milton.
16:24Why are you so goddamn mean, Milton?
16:27Who are you talking to, Bob?
16:28No one.
16:33Who's that?
16:34I ordered drinks.
16:38Hello, Phil.
16:41Hello?
16:42I know you're on vacation, but the Japanese have my nuts in a vice.
16:48You're nuts?
16:49In a vice, Phil. This is Ian, by the way.
16:53This isn't real. This isn't real.
16:55This is very real, Phil.
16:57You said I couldn't talk to you until you're back at work, so I found a loophole.
17:01This boy's parents are staying at your hotel, so I wired them $1,000 to allow the boy to wear
17:06an earpiece.
17:07Now I'm dictating everything the boy is saying.
17:09Fart, butt, penis!
17:11I do not say fart or butt or penis. That was just the boy.
17:15Jacob, if you're not going to take this seriously, please hand fill the phone.
17:18Fine.
17:20Just take it.
17:23Hey, Philly!
17:25Whoa! I think your ear might be infected.
17:29Uh, ear? No, that's totally normal. That's just the earring settling in.
17:32Look, Phil, we're at the finish line on this, man.
17:35We just have to do one more thing.
17:36We've got to fly to Japan to do the whole song and dance in person
17:40to ensure that mythic dance is not offending cultural sensibilities.
17:45So go to Japan. Do the song and dance.
17:48I mean, that's the thing you're good at, right?
17:50I am good at it, and I am going to go.
17:52But I need you to come with me, Phil.
17:55Look, man, nobody knows this game better than you do, including me.
17:58You're the greatest art director that I've ever worked with.
18:01Mythic Quest needs you.
18:03Please.
18:04Ain's right, you know.
18:06You're a great art director, but you'd be a piece of shit husband.
18:09I say go for it.
18:10Okay.
18:12I'll do it.
18:14Nice catch, Jacob.
18:20Look, I know what you're going to say, Momo, but Aya needs me, and I have...
18:23I need you, Phil.
18:24I need you.
18:25Is spending a week with me in a really beautiful place,
18:28is that just so difficult for you?
18:30Is it so horrible that you want to run away?
18:32Because your boss said one nice thing about you.
18:35I mean...
18:36Okay, no answer.
18:37No, no, no, that's good.
18:39It's not going to be more than 24 hours.
18:41You're not even going to know that I'm gone, Mom.
18:43Aya is just...
18:44He needs...
18:44Aya?
18:45Yeah.
18:45I don't give a fuck about Aya.
18:47This is not about Aya.
18:49I don't think that you want to be happy.
18:54And you're terrified of finding any joy or love for yourself
18:57because you don't think you deserve it.
18:58You don't think that you deserve me.
19:02And, um...
19:03You're doing a really good job of convincing me that that's true.
19:12Why are you so much happier being miserable, Buck?
19:16I...
19:26I don't know.
19:45I don't know.
20:09Oh, konnichiwa, Phil Spector.
20:11He's a music producer, also a murderer.
20:14It's a little dark.
20:15Whoa, Phil!
20:17That's like the greatest Hamburg I've ever seen.
20:20Great work.
20:20What the fuck happened to your ear?
20:24Why don't you take the earring out?
20:26The ear is totally fine, Phil.
20:28And I couldn't get the earring out even if I tried.
20:30But Japanese won't let me in there for some health and safety bullshit,
20:33which means I can't do the song and dance,
20:35which means you've got to do the song and dance.
20:42Okay.
20:43Okay.
20:44Yeah.
20:46Yeah, I can do it.
20:47I can walk them through the presentation and it'll be good.
20:49Oh, uh, walk.
20:51Who said walk?
20:52I didn't say the word walk.
20:53Oh, I see the confusion.
20:55When I say song and dance, you think I'm using a colloquialism,
20:58when in fact I need you to demonstrate the actual physical dance moves of the game for the Japanese.
21:04Now.
21:06What?
21:07Are you telling me that I left my fiancé to come get humiliated in front of Japanese dignitaries?
21:13Oh, my God.
21:14Wait.
21:14Fiancé?
21:16Phil, did you get engaged?
21:18Mazel!
21:18No, I mean, I meant to, but I had the, I wrote it down.
21:24Oh, but you failed.
21:27Because you knew that coming back to Mythiquest was going to be best for you.
21:31No.
21:32No.
21:33A normal life where I can go to Hawaii with Maude, that's what's best for me.
21:38Philbo Baggins.
21:39Are you in Hawaii right now?
21:41Or are you in Japan?
21:43Yeah.
21:44You're in Japan.
21:45Because Mythiquest gives you what you need.
21:48All that pressure, it took a lump of coal and it turned it into a diamond.
21:53That's what you are, Phil.
21:55When you're at Mythiquest, you're a diamond.
21:57A beautiful, shiny diamond.
21:59I can barely see the diamond.
22:02But I can.
22:05He's standing right in front of me.
22:09You know, this insane pep talk is actually kind of working.
22:13You know how fucked up that is?
22:14You're shining.
22:15You're absolutely shining.
22:16I mean, I want you to go up there.
22:17I want you to find your light.
22:18And I want you to shimmer like the beautiful gem that you are.
22:35Konichiwa.
22:36My name is Phil.
22:38Son.
22:39And, um, I am honored to be in your country.
22:45It's lovely.
22:47Beautiful.
22:48Really.
22:51I...
22:54And now I am, um, I'm going to demonstrate to you, uh, the gameplay of Mythic Dance.
23:07It's a fucking nightmare.
23:11Ready?
23:12Yeah!
23:13Let's dance!
23:22Let's dance.
23:24Oops.
23:26Miss the step.
23:30Keep trying!
23:53She could have anyone, why would she ruin you?
23:57She could have anyone, why would she want you?
24:30I'm a creep, you can't see me, the hell is mine, the secret of my secret is mine.
24:47Ah, ah, ah, ah, ah, he's running out again, he's running out, he's run, run, run, run.
25:15He's running out, he's running out, he's running out, cause I'm a creep.
25:57She's running out, he's running out, he's running out, he's running out.
26:00I'm truly honored to have you as my first client here
26:04at Philco Design Firm.
26:09Oh, Phil.
26:10Oh, I love that we're getting married.
26:12I don't love this.
26:14So if we could just start over,
26:16I have some ideas that could really make it sing.
26:18You're open to a collaboration.
26:26Okay, we gotta get you a new office.
26:31Can you shut the fuck up, please?
26:34Warmth of your love is like the warmth of the sun.
26:38And this will be our year, took a long time to come.
26:44Don't let go on my head, now darkness has gone.
26:49And this will be our year, took a long time to come.
26:53And I won't forget the way you held me up when I was down.
26:58And I won't forget the way you held me up when I was down.
27:03And I won't forget the way you held me up when I was down.
27:06And this will be our year, took a long time to come.
27:29And this will be our year, took a long time to come.
27:35And this will be our year, took a long time to come.
27:44It took a long time to come, and I won't forget the way you held me up when I was
27:49down, and I won't forget the way you said, darling I love you, you gave me faith to go on,
27:57now we're there, and we've only just begun, and this will be our year, it took a long time to
28:05come.
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