- 7 minutes ago
First broadcast 30th January 1989.
Arthur panics when he learns that there has been a robbery of safety deposit boxes in The City.
Dennis Waterman - Terry
George Cole - Arthur
Glynn Edwards - Dave
Michael Kitchen - Maltese Tony
Don Henderson - Billy Lynch
Carole Ashby - Imogen
Billy Murray - Mick
Trevor Thomas - Dez
Peter Quince - George Lynch
Gerald Campion - Cafe Proprietor
John Tordoff - Shop Assistant
David Simeon - Assistant Manager
Lloyd McGuire - Kramer's Man
Debbie Roza - Hotel Receptionist
April Walker - TV Reporter
Clem Davis - Punter
Kenneth Coombs - Winchester Club Patron
John Maloney - Man in Peep Show
Arthur panics when he learns that there has been a robbery of safety deposit boxes in The City.
Dennis Waterman - Terry
George Cole - Arthur
Glynn Edwards - Dave
Michael Kitchen - Maltese Tony
Don Henderson - Billy Lynch
Carole Ashby - Imogen
Billy Murray - Mick
Trevor Thomas - Dez
Peter Quince - George Lynch
Gerald Campion - Cafe Proprietor
John Tordoff - Shop Assistant
David Simeon - Assistant Manager
Lloyd McGuire - Kramer's Man
Debbie Roza - Hotel Receptionist
April Walker - TV Reporter
Clem Davis - Punter
Kenneth Coombs - Winchester Club Patron
John Maloney - Man in Peep Show
Category
📺
TVTranscript
00:00Take an example of the mark you are looking at there.
00:03A mechanical thoroughbred.
00:05Elegance, performance.
00:07There are not many of them in the country.
00:09Polsky to an half-litre engine,
00:11perestroika carburetors.
00:12You are buying into a different social class
00:15with a car like this.
00:16That's for certain.
00:17It's all uphill from now on.
00:21Feel free to browse, Squire.
00:23I'll just have a word with my staff.
00:30Oi, oi, what's all this?
00:32I've been polishing like a robot for hours.
00:34I'm allowed a break and I...
00:35No, no, I'm not talking about that.
00:36I'm talking about your remarks when I'm trying to flog a motor.
00:39I'll pay you for elbow grease out there, not sabotage.
00:41Ooh, hello.
00:43Someone's had it off.
00:44What?
00:45Safety deposit boxes in the city.
00:47Nah, serves them right for hiding it.
00:49My first thought is...
00:51What did you say?
00:53Said it serves them right for hiding it.
00:55When you put money in a deposit box,
00:57it's bound to be bent, isn't it?
00:58Well, no.
00:58Look, excuse me, I'm only reading it.
01:02Oh, my God.
01:04Oh, my God.
01:07I thought you were all right, son.
01:12Terry, tell me it's a misprint.
01:14Tell me I don't have any delusion.
01:16Oh, help me, Terry.
01:18What?
01:18I don't...
01:19Well, it's not as if you had any money.
01:24You did have Dosh in there, didn't you?
01:26You crafty old sod.
01:28Well, come on, what else you got, eh?
01:30Bank accounts in Switzerland.
01:32Money in South Africa.
01:34Don't give me any aggravation, Terry.
01:36I've just had a massive shot at my nervous system.
01:38Where was the law?
01:40That is a public outrage.
01:41That is downright criminal.
01:42Well, robbery normally is, isn't it?
01:44Yeah.
01:45Oh, here you go, look.
01:46Oh.
01:48The police were unaware of the robbery until several hours after the thieves had left.
01:54Oh.
01:55Well, you can say goodbye to that, look, then, can't you?
01:56Well, don't just sit there.
01:57Do something.
01:58Get in the car.
01:58Get your coat.
01:59Get my coat.
02:00We've got to get down there.
02:01I've been robbed.
02:02Yeah.
02:02Come on.
02:03Oh, we're locked in.
02:03Oi, oi, oi, oi.
02:04Keep his shirt on.
02:06It's about the only thing you've got left.
02:12Forget that.
02:13We're closed.
02:14Come on, Terry.
02:14You're what?
02:15Closed.
02:16I said closed.
02:16You mutton.
02:17Come on, get out of here.
02:18Well, I'm sorry about this.
02:20He's just lost something very dear to him, all right?
02:23If he's going to sell the cars that way.
03:02Have a nice day, darling.
03:04You've made mine.
03:06Come on, then, out with it.
03:08How much?
03:09How much what?
03:10Don't get all snow white.
03:12You know what I'm talking about.
03:13How much bin did you have in that box?
03:15Five.
03:17Six.
03:20Twenty-five.
03:22Twenty-five?
03:24Grand?
03:26Enfolding?
03:28Oh, you old rascal.
03:30How'd you get hold of 25 grand?
03:32Working my bone to the knuckles, that's how.
03:35How do you think?
03:36Now some desperado's got his Germans on it without lifting a finger.
03:39They should bring back hanging.
03:41That'll stop them.
03:42What, we're stealing money?
03:44The town'll be empty.
03:46Anyway, it's got to be bent, hasn't it?
03:48I mean, otherwise you wouldn't have to hide it in a hole in the wall.
03:50Will you stop casting aspersions?
03:52He's not bent.
03:54Anyway, Terry, 25 grand is not a king's ransom these days.
03:58Nah.
03:59Chicken feed, isn't it?
04:01Not worth getting out of bed for.
04:03And that's why you're going loopy, trying to catch up with it.
04:09You can't park in here.
04:11Of course I can.
04:12It's an emergency.
04:13If it's any bother, I'll bung the bishop.
04:18I could hardly take it home and stick it in a jar, could I?
04:24Early indoors goes through me pocket fluff every night.
04:27If she found it, she'd spend it on face cream in a couple of days.
04:31What's wrong with the bank, or is that a silly question?
04:33Oh, you shallow, for God's sake.
04:35I stick it in a bank,
04:36Her Majesty's Jackals be bang at my heels for their whack.
04:40They'd whistle up a jump jet and leave me with a small change.
04:44I see.
04:45Tax evasion.
04:46Avoidance, Terry.
04:47Avoidance.
04:48An entirely different matter.
04:51Yeah, well, this way, of course, you've avoided it altogether, haven't you?
04:56Oh, my life.
04:58Look at this lot.
04:59Looks like a funeral, doesn't it?
05:04Right, really, Terry, I guess I'm going to survive, really.
05:13What's going on?
05:14I'm a friend and a mother.
05:15I want a full explanation of this outrage.
05:17I want total resuscitation, you understand?
05:19Where is the manager?
05:20I'm sorry, Mr. Daly, he can't be here just now,
05:23but we'll bring your box for inspection.
05:25I assure you the company offers its apologies for all this.
05:27Oh, that's very nice, yes.
05:29Your apologies, that'll keep the wall from the door, won't it?
05:31If you'd like to wait in there, sir, we shan't keep you a moment.
05:36So, this is where you collect the ashes, is it?
05:38What do you know about it?
05:40You've never accumulated more on the price of your next gum shield.
05:43This ordeal is putting years on me.
05:46What have I done to deserve this?
05:48You've got to look on the bright side, Arthur.
05:51What bright side?
05:52Well, you're getting your box back, aren't you?
05:55Where is the manager?
05:56What is that lackey doing running the place?
05:59The manager's probably opening a place with their enquiries, isn't he?
06:01What?
06:02Usage?
06:02Your box, Mr. Daly, and your security card.
06:07Yeah, thank you, just a moment, Terry.
06:09Please.
06:17Yeah, that'll be all, thank you.
06:19Terry, don't move from here.
06:21Don't let anyone near that box.
06:23Kill, if necessary.
06:24We'll go into details later.
06:26They're likely to come back, are they?
06:28I mean, I haven't counted what they've got before yet.
06:30If...
06:32Oi!
06:35Oi!
06:46Excuse me, young man.
06:47You're going to be leaving your bicycle here very long.
06:49Yes, come on, come on.
06:50Hold the handle for a minute.
06:52That's it.
06:52Gotcha.
06:53What are you doing?
06:54Is this strictly necessary?
06:56I can carry this thing without looking like a runaway slave, you know.
06:59Ah, stitch in nine, Terrence.
07:00And I do not intend to have two traumas on an empty stomach.
07:03There.
07:03Anyone wants that?
07:04They've got to chop you off at the wrist.
07:05Oh, thanks very much.
07:06I'll make sure I don't bleed all over your 25 grand, of course.
07:10Shush, shush.
07:10That might be a revenue narc about.
07:13Oh, what?
07:14Thanks, man.
07:25What are you going to do with all this?
07:27Bury it at the crossroads?
07:28Shush.
07:29The robbery of a London security firm in the early hours of the morning.
07:33Arthur.
07:35Arthur Daly, you old bandit.
07:37Well, I never.
07:38Morty's Tony.
07:39What are you doing here?
07:40I thought he was abroad.
07:41Oh, I come and I go off the business, like...
07:44Yeah, what's the SP in there, then?
07:45Someone said they've been turned over.
07:47You've just come out.
07:49Er, no.
07:49No, no.
07:50Um, oh, this is Terry.
07:52Terry, this is Tony Manzoni.
07:53Used to run a drinks club in Soho.
07:55And the rest.
07:56How are you?
07:57Oh, nice to meet you.
07:59Oh, sorry.
08:00Well, nice to see you, Tony, but we have to get on.
08:02Temples, fugit and all that.
08:03We must have a drink sometime.
08:04Yeah, good idea.
08:09You still use that club, are you?
08:11Or the Enfield, are you?
08:12No, it's the Winchester.
08:14They're Winchester, they are.
08:15I knew it was a rifle.
08:16Well, we'll have a bevy down there, then, eh, shall we?
08:18Yeah, yeah, good idea.
08:20Oh, no!
08:24Oh, who done that?
08:27Don't look at me like that.
08:29You parked it.
08:32So, you, er, didn't lose nothing and I'll find must be your lucky day.
08:38What was it?
08:39A bit of wedge you got tucked away from the old tax man?
08:41No, no, no, nothing like that.
08:43Just a bundle of business papers, you know.
08:46Company documentation, that sort of thing.
08:48Tiresome if they go missing, but there's no value whatsoever.
08:50Oh, yeah, is that why your mate's done up like the prisoner of Zenda?
08:56Oh, no, no, I'm just looking after the sandwiches, aren't I?
09:01Salmon and cucumber, anybody?
09:03Terry, Terry is employed as my factotum.
09:07The security device is to ensure that he's covered the third-party fire and theft
09:11as an employee in the event of any aggro.
09:15From the old what?
09:18Don't fret about it, Arthur, I understand.
09:20It's none of my business, eh?
09:22Couldn't have put it better myself, Tony.
09:25Oh, oh, just along here.
09:27Do us fine.
09:28Er, we'll alight here, driver, if you'd be so kind.
09:32What are you talking about?
09:33We're miles from the lock-up.
09:35That's lovely.
09:39Thanks a lot.
09:40Well, come on, Terry, pay the man, pay the man.
09:43Do what?
09:44Well, I can't, I've only got credit cards.
09:46Tony, erm, sorry, I've only got credit cards.
09:49Don't worry about it, Arthur, you can buy me a drink.
09:52Good idea.
09:53Ta.
09:53See ya.
09:54Ta-ra, Tony.
09:57You put him all over his eyes, didn't you, eh?
09:59You and your bundle of paper.
10:01How's that around just here?
10:03Oh, no, sorry, I've got security, innit?
10:06What's all this about credit cards?
10:07You're not allowed a credit card.
10:09Who is he, anyway?
10:11I don't remember seeing him on this man, huh?
10:13No, his dad made a packet in Soho after the war.
10:16There were a lot of Maltese there then.
10:17You know, tarts, gambling, all that.
10:19Oh, yeah, I remember them.
10:21A lot of black shirts and white tyres wandering up and down Old Compton Street.
10:24Spivs.
10:25Yeah, in a word.
10:26Old Manzoni went home, took his pile with him.
10:29Tony stayed on, ran a club and won them naughty cinemas.
10:32Tilda Council got the hump.
10:34He faded after they closed that down.
10:37I thought he might have gone back to the old country.
10:40They do that sort of thing, you know?
10:42Yeah, but if he was born here, this is his old country, innit?
10:44Eh?
10:45Ouch!
10:46Give me the hang.
10:50How'd you know him, anyway?
10:52Sold him his first motor.
10:53Come on.
10:55Vauxhall Cresta.
10:57Column change.
10:58Bench seats.
10:59Lovely thing.
11:05Come on then, get this off us.
11:06I'm getting chainsaws.
11:08Do you like it?
11:09Chainsaws.
11:10Never mind that.
11:11Hang on a minute.
11:14Oh, you foolish.
11:16Strike me.
11:17Where'd you get that?
11:17The Tower of London?
11:20Warehouse clearance down the docks.
11:22Solid metal.
11:23Built when we still had an empire.
11:24But why didn't you put some of this in there?
11:26I mean, it would have saved all the aggro, wouldn't it?
11:27Because I was misled and believing a security company was a security company, not a takeaway
11:31for passing villains, much for my cost.
11:34What are they used to keep in it?
11:35Rats?
11:35Never mind that.
11:36Come on, let's get all this in there.
11:39Well, is it all right with you if I have my arm back first?
11:41No, no, Terry.
11:42I want an absolute vow of secrecy from you.
11:44Stum.
11:45Not a word to anyone, understand?
11:47Yeah, yeah.
11:47Don't even go shouting out in your sleep.
11:49Because sometimes you mix with some very iffy company.
11:52Arthur, look, I'm not going to say anything, all right?
11:54Now, where's the key?
11:55That's all right.
11:56I've got the key.
11:58There you are.
11:59No, not that, you pill at this.
12:04That thieving little toe rag.
12:07I gave him a jacks, too.
12:09He didn't give me the key.
12:18Hello, Mr. Kramer.
12:20Tony here.
12:22Maltese.
12:25Yeah, I'm in London, Mr. Kramer, at the hotel, yeah.
12:29Well, there's been a bit of an upset at this end.
12:31That dress she gave me for the drop, well, it got turned over last night.
12:36No, it's straight up.
12:37It's in the papers and everything.
12:39I thought they might be friends of yours, Mr.
12:44No, of course not, no.
12:47What do you want me to do, then?
12:51All right, I'll be here.
12:55All right.
12:56According to police investigating the crime this morning, the full value of the deposit
13:01boxes raided by the gang may never be known, with many depositors reluctant to reveal their
13:07contents.
13:14Hello.
13:22Hello, Mr. Kramer, get it sorted.
13:27Yeah, tomorrow.
13:30No, fine by me.
13:32You're picking up the tab, Mr. Kramer.
13:34Where shall I take it?
13:37Yeah, got that.
13:40He'll know me, will he?
13:44Right.
13:4511 o'clock sharp?
13:47No, of course I won't, Mr. Kramer, more than my life's worth, innit?
13:54Yes, Mr. Kramer.
13:55I know you are.
14:19Well, tell her dowry up and get over it, then.
14:20No one's going to bang half a quid in the slot to watch her with a runny nose and a
14:24Beecham's powder, are they?
14:26Oh, hey, hang on, hang on.
14:28Ain't she got a sister or something?
14:30Ah, just my luck.
14:32All right, all right.
14:34Billy.
14:35What?
14:35Guess who I've just seen on the telly just now.
14:38The Archangel Gabriel.
14:39Look, I'm serious, Billy.
14:41What is this?
14:42Mastermind?
14:42How do I know?
14:44Maltese bloody Tony on the telly just now.
14:47What are you on about, Des?
14:50Manzoni skipped two years ago.
14:52I'm telling you, there he was, stood on the street talking with that old puns that sell
14:55motor cars.
14:56He's in London, Billy.
14:58He'd be in little pieces if he is.
15:01You sure about this?
15:03Of course I'm sure.
15:03I've got eyes in my head, haven't I?
15:05Just about.
15:07Who was this motor trader?
15:10You know him.
15:11He sold Mickey Woods at Mirkwood Sawdus in the gearbox.
15:15What's his name?
15:16Daley.
15:17That's a guy.
15:19Half a bloody daly.
15:22What are you carrying in there?
15:23I especially don't know, mate.
15:26So, Gordon Bennett, you could have me arm off with that.
15:29I've had enough drama without giving blood for him and all.
15:31Ew, ew.
15:32All I hope is he's not getting you into anything naughty.
15:35You've got far too much form for all of that.
15:36Tell me.
15:37No, no, it's nothing like that.
15:38I'm his fat totem these days, aren't I?
15:40He's what?
15:41Right-hand man.
15:42Well, that's what worries me.
15:44He's got your right arm locked up already.
15:47Yeah.
15:49Oh, well done.
15:51Wonderful.
15:52Well, I'd better have a drink now, see if it still works, eh?
15:54Right.
15:55Unchained melody, eh?
15:56You remember that?
15:57Well, it's a song.
15:58Yeah, before your time, I expect.
16:01Jimmy Young used to sing it.
16:02Of course, that was before he became Jimmy Young.
16:05It used to make his jaw stick out sideways, I remember.
16:09Oh, my love, my darling, I hunger for your touch.
16:14Oh.
16:15You better have one and all before you remember the rest of it and you stay like that.
16:23What do you reckon, Nick?
16:26I don't know.
16:28Look, I'll wait here.
16:29You go and see what Billy says, all right?
16:31Good idea.
16:34Yeah.
16:36Nobody about, gov.
16:37Gates locked.
16:38Wouldn't take much of a break into the office, sir.
16:40Do you want us to take a look?
16:41No.
16:42I can do without him calling the law before I've had a word with him.
16:45More teas will get wind of it and bolt.
16:48All right.
16:48What do you want us to hang about?
16:51Oh, he won't be back now.
16:53Check around a bit, Des.
16:54Find out where he drinks.
16:55And if you get hold of him, bring him to me, right?
17:00No problem.
17:01Make sure he can still talk, though, eh?
17:03I don't want him spitting teeth all over my carpet.
17:06You can have your fun with more teas when we lay hands on him.
17:13Can I help you, sir?
17:14Oh, yes.
17:16I'm looking for an alarm system for lock-up premises.
17:21Not mine.
17:22Someone else's.
17:23I don't have one.
17:25Really?
17:26Well, if it's a full system you need, you'd need a specialist firm.
17:30They'll tell you what you need and install it for you.
17:32Oh, no, no, no.
17:32No, I don't want...
17:33My friend doesn't want men in blue overalls swarming all over the place, you know.
17:37No, no.
17:38What he had in mind was a more cost-effective method of dissuasion.
17:41If I can find one for him.
17:43At a reasonable price.
17:46Well, if you want to do it on the cheap, there's, um...
17:50A floodlight system you could put up for 50 quid.
17:55Ready to go.
17:56That seems very reasonable.
17:58Um, how does it work?
18:01In layman's terms.
18:02Infrared.
18:03Trinkers off two floodlights.
18:05Works on body heat, car engines.
18:08Stays on or switches itself off on a timer.
18:11Oh, yeah, I can see the logic of that.
18:13That would save my friend money on his power bills, wouldn't it?
18:15Yeah, I think that's just a job.
18:19What, er...
18:20What else you got?
18:21Oh, yeah.
18:36Great.
18:42It's all right, welcome.
18:52hello georgie you all right yeah wonderful booking it for a couple of weeks next year
18:57oh yeah i wouldn't bring the family
19:04had a little touch today might give you something to think about guess who's been spotted enjoying
19:10the fresh air today tell me only that rotten fellow what marked your card with the vice god georgie
19:19that same geezer what got you banged up in here saving his own skin
19:25don't tell me you've forgotten his name must be all the interesting things you get up to in here
19:33yeah slipped right out of my head betty's forgotten mine too
19:41joker's memory for me would you very hard thanks sir all right thank you
20:40thanks to you why couldn't you got here five minutes earlier beware the dog really
20:46well where is it then or is that just to let us know you're in very comical is it likely
20:52i will keep
20:53a dog in there with my stock that is part of a sophisticated system i am installing while i've
20:59got that wedge on the premises
21:03well beware the dog sign without a dog what's sophisticated about that apart from the fact
21:08you don't have to feed it i suppose psychiatry terry plant the fear of slavering jaws in the mind of
21:13the
21:13average villain he's off like a rabbit why do you think the law has all them alsatians they're not
21:18hurting german sheep are they no but they do bark who's gonna do that you right i don't see you
21:23out
21:23there that is the first weapon in my fight against the intruder that is the next one have a butchers
21:31be careful cool you've been lashing out haven't you what is it that is technically known as a false
21:39out alarm a couple of batteries for the little light screw it on the wall and for all they know
21:43you're wired up to scotland yard very subtle i thought subtle it's a joke but you're not wired to
21:49anything yeah but the light was intent on a felony don't know that do he that is a visual deterrence
21:54terrence terry very useful when there's villains around behold what is that state of the art that
22:02is see that yeah that is a genuine infrared microwave sensor microwave invisible but all-seeing
22:11what's it do make the toast and then fire it at them bring the ladder
22:19i'll get a lad if you had two brain cells to rub together you'd see what it does
22:23stick the ladder just there if you walk in front of this you get caught in a sudden blaze of
22:29light
22:30pinpointed no hiding place here hold it now don't drop it light so what is that for when the alarm
22:36don't go off and the dog don't bark look you stop nausing it and hand it here will you figure
22:40oh no no no
22:41hang on hang on hang on you get up and make yourself useful i can't do it i get vertigo
22:45i've gone all
22:46giddy certainly got all something to cop for this lot still if they're all deaf and frightened of fairy
22:52lights this should really scare them off shouldn't it what do you think do you like it i think you're
23:02a funny man you always follow girls around no no they generally follow me i get taken for robber redford
23:10a lot same height same shoe size same must be a lot of trouble more for him than for me
23:16he gets
23:16a lot of women coming up and saying here ain't you maltese tony so you are from malta you sound
23:22from
23:22england family name dad was maltese george uncle harry was maltese harry couldn't very well call me
23:30charing cross could they yeah you steer for a bit i'll look out for the shops
23:37good evening pal good evening gents what i do for you we're looking for a motor trader drinks down
23:45here arthur daly oh yeah is he around john the name is dave arthur generally gets in later than this
23:52oh yeah well we'll have a baby and wait then shall we nick yeah sounds favorite uh got any grouch
24:01oh
24:01i'm sorry gents i can't serve you unless you are members only that is the rules of the club
24:06i can give you a proposal form though i'll find the damn thing come on this is a water at
24:11all on it
24:13there ain't a lot of water drunk here did you want to see arthur on business or social business
24:21and a bit of social if he's up to it look if he ain't in his car a lot he's
24:25probably done his
24:25locker back at the old brewery you could try that all right we'll do that if he's not there we'll
24:31come
24:31back here later tell him billy lynch wants a word will you billy lynch yeah you know billy lynch right
24:48well come on then some systems go out there or it would be if anything went you can be as
24:54caustic
24:54as you like this is my investment i'm protecting not yours you'd have blown it all on the donkeys
24:59by four o'clock you should be very grateful to me oh yeah oh yeah
25:09all right then yep yeah no no no that is all activated up there you've got to creep round it
25:18doesn't wake fang either hey hey we'll set it off
25:25good to be back you know don't know how much you miss it when you're on the off the off
25:30travel abroad
25:32like you have been abroad for a long time couple of years nearly i had a business going with a
25:38fella
25:38but it went a bit bad he was being naughty so i ducked out and left him with it wound
25:44up in marbella
25:44a lot of money in marbella yes i think so why are you here now for holiday no i'm moving
25:54some funds for a
25:55friend of mine got to see a man tomorrow then i'm off ain't good for my health stay here too
26:00long
26:00same for me too it's too damp in london gives everybody bad chest oh i don't want to say that
26:08tell you what we'll have another one here shall we then we'll go to a club see an old friend
26:14of mine
26:14very funny how's that sound club yes last week i was in tram a lot of noise oh well we're
26:21going to
26:22taxi then it was pure panic panic look at that little run in this morning i had criminal deprivation
26:29a clamp from john law a street urchin trying to rob me blind and your endless lip and how did
26:34i cope
26:34with that that's what i said pure panic what you fail to understand in your ignorance is a difference
26:40between panic and an heightened state of mental awareness what's the matter with you put it on my
26:45slate no no on second thoughts let him pay for it he still owes me for that padlock you ruined
26:50do what
26:51you put it on his slate i hate to break up this little diff but i've got a message for
26:55you arthur
26:56i had a couple of geezers in here just now looking for you hey who were they what do you
27:00want i don't
27:01know i didn't recognize them but they said they had a message for you they said uh billy lynch wants
27:06a word with you end the message billy lynch what's billy lynch want to see me for i didn't say
27:11i don't
27:12think they wanted to wish you happy birthday are you the geezer that runs that strip club yeah the one
27:17in
27:17barrack street yeah val used to work there that's right yeah who's val they look very tasty where'd
27:22they go well i thought you might have seen them i sent them down to lock up say that again
27:26i sent
27:27them down to lock up i knew terry will be with you if i was gonna get naughty terry see
27:36that heightened
27:38state of mental awareness awesome isn't it there's nobody about he's like a scarlet pimpernel this daily
27:52yeah we'll have one more crack at that club then knock it on the head all right and then we
27:58get back
27:58to billy and see what he says about it right here enough here dave look good evening miss
28:15evening chief tony mansoni used to pop in here with arthur way back oh yeah how are you keeping top
28:21of the world this is image hello pleased to meet you young lady well uh what you gonna have i
28:29like
28:29to dance you have no dancing uh no no dancing no well we don't get much call for dancing really
28:36use a couple of vodkas and tonic chief well you know arthur then right he had a run you just
28:41missed
28:41him oh shame i think this is not a club it is a bar we drink this and go to
28:46club yes for dancing
28:47you dance all night darling i promise you yeah yeah there's no need to rush off i mean i could
28:53always put the radio on for you it's a cup of drinks chief eh oh yeah of course
29:06well cold it's is all quiet by the look of it i only could have cut the wires you could
29:12break into
29:13that door with hammer and chisel if you wanted to come on go and look i'll wait and see if
29:18anyone
29:18comes out oh you'll wait will you yeah that'd be a great comfort while they're all jumping all over
29:24me i'll tell them get off arthur's waiting come on watch out for the infra what's name what
29:44what you've done you've got any catherine wheels arthur
29:54what are we gonna do if he's in there i mean the geezer behind the ramp wasn't all that friendly
29:58was
29:58it nah it's no problem but we'll take an elbow each and walk daily out if we have to
30:04you can smack matey if you feel like it
30:12hold on a minute i think we've struck it lucky yeah that's maltese isn't it it isn't all yeah
30:18that's more like it that's manzoni we've had a result with it my son
30:38thank you hello maltese going somewhere nice
30:47come here you little weasel
30:54it's very painful i think
30:5850 quid for a rotten firework display
31:07terry wait oh there you are yeah come on raise yourself it's broad daylight the bird is on the
31:12wing out there good luck to them and all it was broad daylight before i got any sleep you didn't
31:18have any trouble did you yeah i had trouble trying to sleep on that thing curled up like that dog
31:24you
31:24haven't got what's wrong with being a night watchman i said i'll put you on wages you are being paid
31:29for
31:29sleeping sleeping i love that you try sleeping on that well you won't have to get used to it
31:33all right i'll have my assets redeployed by the time your head clears good
31:40what are you gonna do with it all then aha i shall do what i am best at terry
31:44i shall use my business flair to diversify i spotted an opportunity yesterday when i was
31:49pauperizing myself with all that security rubbish spare parts what for cars or people
31:56i don't see you doing arms and legs you know you're worse in the morning car parts i'm talking
32:01about terrible markup i'll see you later where are you going for some breakfast oh no you're not
32:08you're staying here well my cash flow is still at risk if you want wages i'll bring you back a
32:12sandwich hold on look i haven't even had a safe don't worry don't worry it's fashionable you look
32:17like one of them upper class guppies a tart
32:28you had him and the two of you
32:33couldn't handle a tart let him walk away it wasn't like that gov i had her i tripped over a
32:41chair by the
32:42time i got up well he bolted des couldn't catch him either you know he ain't been back since you
32:49sure of that no i mean we've been there all night and des is still there oh
32:57well he better keep his eyes open then let's hope we don't get mugged by some little old lady
33:07if he's on his toes he's gonna get help from somewhere get that half a daily year now right
33:15daily right away yeah and if you can't handle it send rita you can stay downstairs and do her job
33:42you know me barry early to bed that's a secret hey listen that um that consignment of parts you
33:48had you still got them
33:57negotiable i'll have to knock them out second hand won't i all right all right you let me know and
34:02i'll send my man over okay tell her well can't you knock this is an office i was having a
34:09personal
34:09conversation you're after daily aren't you i might be who are you billy lynch will have a little chat
34:15with you my son hey come on lively hey hey hey hey you're on private property here i'm a taxpayer
34:21you
34:22can't do this get off listen you're in london you know not beirut shut your mouth daily i can have
34:32charges bro
34:34you shot off early last night tell what happened well i got lumbered into a bit of night work
34:39i'm a guard dog now aren't i oh well one way to make a living i suppose you've got loud
34:45bark have you
34:48just get us a cup of tea will you yeah a cup of tea please rusted here you miss the
34:53best bit of
34:54comfort i ever seen down there page three one in it well in the winchester who's it with i've made
35:02of arthur's uh geezer with a tan tony something oh him yeah yeah he's ready to show up yeah yeah
35:08he didn't
35:09stay long mind you i can't say i blame him i think you've got a bit of night work worked
35:13out for
35:14himself some people have all the luck don't they the rest of us have to make do with your fry
35:20-ups oh
35:21that's nice is it
35:31i don't know why you can't behave in a more civilized fashion you've never heard of the telephone
35:37look watch your coat will you watch your coat
35:43bye bye henry uh come on sorry dear
35:48here he is gov don't let me interrupt anything billy
35:51i'm just a law-abiding citizen who's been dragged here against his will by this
35:55lunk what's all this about anyway it's all about your maltese mate arthur your friend and mine
36:04where is he manzoni what should i know apart from an unavoidable five minutes yesterday i hardly know
36:11the man i can't help it if i'm buttonhole can i what's he done anyway
36:19he left my brother doing a two-stretch for a lorry load of porn what they shipped in
36:26half of it was his so he's got a smacking coming and if i think you're holding out on me
36:32we'll take your face apart right now
36:37how's that sounds hello terry am i glad to see you pal give us a minute will you
36:44yeah what's up everything mate listen we don't know each other but you're arthur's muscle right
36:49yeah that's right i'm odd job i know if i don't lay my hands on some dosh i got stashed
36:54away at the
36:54great western royal and make it to the drop i'm brown bread and arthur's caught up in the
36:59cock up and all he's in trouble mate you've got to get a result for the pair of us arthur's
37:03in
37:03trouble where is he billy lynch is after him come here so more keys ain't been near you since
37:12yesterday no phone calls no cries for help on my life billy he scrounged a lift in a cab when
37:18my motor
37:18was shackled i was glad to see the back of him i never did trust the man hmm you're not
37:24a bad judge
37:27all right enough i'll buy that for now but if you get so much as a sniff of him
37:34you tell me and as you fancy waking up in bandages capisce i will be on the blower william stand
37:42on me
37:42at the first sighting i'm sorry we've had to have this little conjure top here look have a card then
37:47you can keep me in touch with events without having to send tarzan here yeah um can your boy give
37:52me a
37:52lift back because i'll never get a cab round here get him out of here come on you get your
38:00hands off of
38:01me so billy's after you and arthur's gonna get a pasting for it not exactly kosher is it of course
38:09it ain't but i can't go handing myself over i've got a man to me i'll be in concrete if
38:13i don't and i
38:14can't do that till mcandez are out the frame god help me sort this terry you're all i got mate
38:20yeah i can see that hold on one mess at a time all right uh i'll go and pull arthur
38:25out that club
38:26you stay here terry i've got to make that meet i mean i've got to hard luck look i'm not
38:34letting
38:34arthur get jumped on just to suit your timetable stay here i won't be long yeah but but relax
38:40make yourself a nice cup of tea
39:03very thoughtful squire i forget our earlier frac ass this time
39:07device portman's own is should try for the advanced driver's certificate
39:20terry
39:25terry oh my god
39:35oh
39:50you what are you doing here long story arthur
39:54i'm sorry about this but it's you or me right oh no no no violence i mustn't be it i'm
40:00a sick man
40:00all right all right all right all right get in there go on hey i can't go in there get
40:04in there
40:05all right i'm going i'm going
40:08i see they get you for this friends only i see they hunt you down i'd rather have the law
40:14on me than the
40:15fellas i'm talking to arthur i wouldn't even be safe inside if i come up short with them what are
40:20you
40:20doing what are you doing what are you doing think of it as a loan eh
40:27a loan i don't give loans leave it alone that's my life savings you're stealing
40:33well we'll get a bit of change anyway i'll leave your keys for you shall i i'm sorry
40:39alpha mate ta-ta oh don't go don't leave me i suffocate i'll get hydrophobia oh
40:47oh
41:17money
41:19what are you doing something for me from mr kramer in marbella eddie yes
41:27it's all that chief don't worry of course it is you'd hardly be entrusted with it otherwise would you
41:35go
41:46arthur
41:47open a cage open a cage
41:52what are you doing in there sleeping fast let me out terry keys on the desk
41:59Oh, thank God you came. I couldn't have left it much longer.
42:04It's all right, it's all right. There you go.
42:12What happened?
42:13I've been robbed. Robbed and bludgeoned by that monstrous Malteser.
42:18Where were you?
42:20I was running around so like a blue arse fly looking at you, weren't I?
42:23Oh, yeah.
42:24Yeah.
42:26Oh, dear.
42:28What was he doing here?
42:29I tried to fend him off but he went berserk.
42:34You didn't bring him here, did you?
42:35You're not part of his perpetration.
42:38Don't be a diddlo.
42:39He turned up here and, well, I told him to stay.
42:42You what? Are you brain dead or something with all this money here?
42:46What did you do, chuck him the keys and stroll off to have breakfast?
42:49I was trying to pull you out of a scrape at the time.
42:52I told him to stay here because I thought he was a pal of yours.
42:56How come he left all that?
42:58I don't know. Probably rubbed salt in the wound.
43:00But the important thing is where is the rest of it?
43:03And much more important, where is he now?
43:05Dial 999.
43:06No, no, no. Look, look, look.
43:08The only thing I do know is he had a meet somewhere, right?
43:13That bird.
43:14Oh, good.
43:15I've been assaulted and battered and all you can think of is birds.
43:17No, no, no. He was in the Winchester with a bird.
43:19I mean, maybe she'll know where he's going or something.
43:21Eh?
43:22Look, phone Dave. It's got to be worth a try for that amount of money, innit?
43:27No, you do it. I can't. I can't. I can't.
43:51Fellas, let's talk about it, shall we?
44:00Well, er, excuse me, lovelies. Is there a lady called Imogen working here?
44:03The tall, blonde job.
44:06Er, excuse me, are you Imogen?
44:08Yeah. I help you, yes.
44:11Well, yes. Yeah, er, I think you could.
44:14Very much so, as it happens.
44:17So when these men came for Tony, I hid them.
44:20But he runs away. He's in trouble, I think.
44:23Well, he will be if he catches up with him.
44:25If this don't work, he'll have old Bill on his case.
44:28You are old Bill?
44:29No, no, no. I'm Arthur. Arthur Daly. I am the agreed party.
44:33Oh, I'm sorry.
44:34How do you find me? I was not long in your club.
44:37Oh, well, no. See, the man at the club, Dave, he never forgets a face.
44:40Sorry.
44:41Oh, hold on.
44:43Now, you've got to keep your... That's it. Keep your left up.
44:45Excuse me, my dear. Come here.
44:47Look, keep your mind off that for a minute, will you?
44:49Listen, if he's here, we can call the law. No message.
44:52I want the money back, but I want you to dismay him first.
44:55I want rough justice, Terry. The rougher, the better.
44:58Don't want much, do you?
45:03Good afternoon, sir. Can I help you?
45:05Yes, we're looking for Mr Manzoni at Forum. Malteser from Malta. Is he in?
45:12Mr Manzoni left the hotel about half an hour ago.
45:14Oh, gone, was he? Marvellous.
45:17Look, he didn't leave any messages, did he?
45:19No.
45:19No. I just thought he might want to say thank you.
45:27Look, I'm sorry about wrecking your lunch.
45:29Maybe, um...
45:31Maybe I could make it up to you, you know.
45:32Take you out somewhere.
45:34With old Bill?
45:36No, I think we'll leave old Bill at home.
45:38Just you and me, eh?
45:39Terry!
45:40All right, all right.
45:41Oh, yes, I think.
45:42Telephone me first. I'll give you my number.
45:44Smashing.
45:52Terry!
45:55Hey, dog.
45:57Hey, dog.
45:58See you soon.
46:01Oh, I don't want to stand around waiting to be robbed again.
46:04All right.
46:06Bye-bye.
46:07Well, she's a bit tasty, though, isn't she?
46:28So, it's the law, then, is it?
46:30Well, what else can I do?
46:31I can't let robbery with violence go unremarked.
46:35I don't want Plod crawling all over the car lot with his fingerprint powder.
46:39Be customs and excise next.
46:41There's a problem.
46:42But why not call Billy?
46:43He might have had a result.
46:44Oh, that's all right.
46:45No need for that, Terry.
46:46I've seen him.
46:51You again?
46:52Terry, put one on him, Terry.
46:53Hit him.
46:53Oh, don't be stupid.
46:54Look at him.
46:55Yeah.
46:56Don't mind if I sit down, do you?
46:58Who did this?
46:58Billy?
47:00Then Des.
47:02Then Nick had a little go.
47:04Oh, nice.
47:05Yeah, very nice.
47:06Mind you, you earned it, you treacherous little bandit.
47:08Where's my money?
47:09I had to give it to a fella, Arthur.
47:11Well, that's what it was all about.
47:13Funny, isn't it?
47:13I don't even know what it was for.
47:15Funny?
47:16Funny?
47:16Terry, drag him out and hit him.
47:18Go on.
47:18How about Arthur?
47:20Mine was the hotel.
47:22I went back for it, didn't I?
47:24It's here for you.
47:2620 grand?
47:28All of it?
47:30On the nail.
47:32Are you saying you got a good idea and then went back for it?
47:35He ain't all bad, Arthur.
47:36Well, you didn't have to stand up to him while he was wielding the cosh.
47:42I love the backpack.
47:44Well, fair's fair.
47:45Oh, look at the mess you made of that back seat.
47:47Clara all over the place.
47:49Oh, well, you'd have to buy it now, won't you?
47:52It's just a great idea.
47:52Ah, that's good.
47:54Bye.
47:54Bye.
47:55Bye.
47:55Bye.
47:55Bye.
47:55Bye.
47:55Bye.
47:55You
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