00:00Honey, I shrugged the kids!
00:02Honey, I blew up the kids!
00:04Honey, I hooked jumper cables up to the kids,
00:06and now they're charged skeletons on the floor!
00:08Looks metal as hell!
00:10Honey, I gave the kids cancer because one of them ate all the Oreos,
00:13but I don't know which one, so I just did it to both.
00:16Honey, I taught the kids how to pickpocket!
00:19Wait, where's my wallet?
00:21Honey, I completed the National Dex and Pokemon Platinum!
00:25And then I backed over the kids with my Jeep Cherokee!
00:28Those two are connected somehow!
00:31Honey, I built robotic duplicates of the kids to hold my coat for me
00:34and do literally nothing else!
00:36Honey, the kids need a software update before they can do anything!
00:40Honey, I fused the kids into one giant mega-kid!
00:43Honey, mustard is my favorite condiment!
00:47Honey, the kids don't want to do stuff with me anymore, and I don't know why!
00:51Honey, I can't look at those divorce papers right now!
00:53I'm busy implanting my Vietnam War flashbacks into the kids' minds!
00:57Honey, the house is under my name! Why do you get to keep it?
01:01Honey, please come back! I miss you!
01:03Honey, I killed your new boyfriend and now I'm wearing his skin because I'm better than he'll ever be!
01:09Honey, seriously, I really miss you! Please come back to me!
01:14Honey, I've texted you like 15 times and you don't respond! What's going on?
01:18Says you blocked my number! What's that about?
01:21Honey, I'm being dragged into hell! Like, I didn't even die yet!
01:24They just decided I'm so evil, I need to go, like, now!
01:28Okay, bye!
01:36Honey, seriously, I can change! Please come back!
01:38Look, I broke through the end card just to show how dedicated I am! Please-
01:42whoops!
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