Keeping Up Is Costly | DISC 6: Vitality | 411 Podcast🍾Reading Between The Wines (Episode 10)
Featuring: Wine Down Wednesday, Mentorship Series
Wednesday | February 4th, 2026
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Song of The Day: "None of Your Business" by Salt-N-Pepa
Released 1993 | Very Necessary
Burning Questions for Reflections!
Who are you trying to impress - and what is it costing you to keep the image alive?
Share your response to tonight's Burning Questions... Text: (609) 200-1098 | Email: Info@LerinGaines.com
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DISCLAIMER: The content and information provided by Black Diamond Consultations are intended solely for educational and entertainment purposes. We do not guarantee the accuracy or completeness of the materials, and any reliance you place on them is strictly at your own risk. Our content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice or judgment. Black Diamond Consultations shall not be liable for any errors or omissions in the educational and entertainment content or for any actions taken based on the information provided.
411 Podcast🍾Reading Between The Wines
DISC 6: Vitality
Track 10: Keeping Up Is Costly
©️ 2026 Black Diamond Consultations Network
LerinGaines.com
Featuring: Wine Down Wednesday, Mentorship Series
Wednesday | February 4th, 2026
Streaming LIVE on all social media platforms @LERINGAINES
https://leringaines.com
https://linktr.ee/leringaines
https://www.facebook.com/leringaines
http://instagram.com/leringaines
https://www.tiktok.com/@leringaines
http://twitter.com/leringaines
https://www.youtube.com/@leringaines
https://www.twitch.tv/leringaines
https://dlive.tv/LerinGaines
https://dailymotion.com/LerinGaines
Song of The Day: "None of Your Business" by Salt-N-Pepa
Released 1993 | Very Necessary
Burning Questions for Reflections!
Who are you trying to impress - and what is it costing you to keep the image alive?
Share your response to tonight's Burning Questions... Text: (609) 200-1098 | Email: Info@LerinGaines.com
DM on any social media platform @LERINGAINES (Facebook, Instagram, X, TikTok, YouTube, DLIVE, Twitch, DailyMotion)
Sign up for my FREE Monthly Newsletter 'Whispers of Wisdom' for updates, exclusives, and inspiration!
Subscribe now at LerinGaines.com
#Facebook #Instagram #TikTok #X #YouTube #DLIVE #Twitch #DailyMotion #DebtFreeLiving #FinancialCoach #LerinGaines #411Podcast #RBTW #ReadingBetweenTheWines #BurningQuestions #BlackDiamondConsultations #VacationWithMe #WhispersofWisdom #DISC6 #Vitality
DISCLAIMER: The content and information provided by Black Diamond Consultations are intended solely for educational and entertainment purposes. We do not guarantee the accuracy or completeness of the materials, and any reliance you place on them is strictly at your own risk. Our content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice or judgment. Black Diamond Consultations shall not be liable for any errors or omissions in the educational and entertainment content or for any actions taken based on the information provided.
411 Podcast🍾Reading Between The Wines
DISC 6: Vitality
Track 10: Keeping Up Is Costly
©️ 2026 Black Diamond Consultations Network
LerinGaines.com
Category
️👩💻️
WebcamTranscript
00:00Let's get started.
00:30Let's get started.
01:00Let's get started.
01:30Let's get started.
02:00Let's get started.
02:301. You're now tuned into the 411 podcast and reading Between the Wines, powered by the Black Diamond Consultations Network.
02:39More than a podcast, this is a sanctuary for self-discovery, healing, and personal growth.
02:45Here, we explore what it means to live debt-free, not just financially, but spiritually, mentally, physically, and emotionally.
02:53Every episode is part of a journey across our weekly mentorship series, spiritual Sundays, mental Mondays, transformational Tuesdays, wind-down Wednesdays, coaching sessions Thursdays, and financial Fridays.
03:07Each day holds space for wisdom, clarity, and real conversation.
03:13So grab your journal, pour your glass, and prepare to go beyond the surface.
03:17Because here, we don't just talk, we transform.
03:21And now, here's your guide through it all, entrepreneur, mentor, and founder of Black Diamond Consultations, Laren Gaines.
03:29What's going on?
03:31What's going on?
03:32Welcome, welcome, welcome on in.
03:35Welcome to Reading Between the Wines.
03:38Friends, this is another Wind Down Wednesday.
03:42I want to say thank you all so much for coming in.
03:46Thank you so much for joining.
03:48Of course, I could not do any of this without each and every one of you out there supporting, liking, commenting, sharing, in general.
03:58So I want to say thank you so much.
04:00I also want to give a very special thank you to my executive producer, my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, for giving me another opportunity to come out here and give you the podcast, give you Reading Between the Wines once again.
04:16So I want to say thank you, and let's get this thing started.
04:21Let's get this thing going.
04:22I am feeling very grateful and thankful for being in the space that I'm in today.
04:30So, here we go.
04:34Episode 10, Keeping Up is Costly.
04:40This is going to be a good episode.
04:43Keeping Up is Costly, episode 10.
04:47We're going to speak about this lifestyle creep.
04:51This thing that happens once we get a little bit more.
04:57We start to feel a little bit more about ourselves that we start to creep up with our living and how we're showing up in the world.
05:07And also this pressure, you know, keeping up with the Joneses.
05:12You know, I kind of really dislike that.
05:14So we're going to talk about what happens when you compare yourself up against others.
05:22What happens with your money when your mindset is so fixated on what somebody else thinks of you?
05:30Episode 10, Keeping Up is Costly.
05:36Of course, we are in this six vitality.
05:43And let's get into the song.
05:44I love this group.
05:47I grew up off of them.
05:49And although this is not one of their favorite songs, I think I heard Salt say that during an interview, if they asked her.
05:59If there's one song that she regrets recording and it is none of your business.
06:06Salt and Pepper.
06:08Released in 1993 off of the Very Necessary album.
06:12One of my favorite albums, of course, you know, the song Shoop is on there.
06:17What a Man is on there.
06:18And this was the third single, None of Your Business.
06:21And, you know, I'm going to remix it the way, you know, we do here.
06:27It really is none of your business what somebody else thinks of you.
06:31That's the first part.
06:33It really is none of your business what other people think of you.
06:37So how you showing up, how you making your moves, how you spending your money, how you're presenting yourself, how you're representing yourself.
06:45It really is none of your business of what somebody else thinks of you.
06:50And furthermore, it's really none of your business what somebody else has going on.
06:55Because a lot of times when we try to keep up with the Joneses, when we get so consumed and so concerned about what somebody else is doing, what they have.
07:07That's when it leads to destruction in our lives.
07:10Those same people that you are looking up to, comparing yourself to, majority of the time, I don't even know what the time is, but majority of it, behind closed doors, they're really not happy.
07:23If you can turn that person inside out and read them like a book, they probably are not happy.
07:30So while you're looking and seeking after their car, clothes, jewelry, all of those things, sometimes people, you know, look after their wives, girlfriends, boyfriends, you know, you want what somebody else has.
07:44Be careful.
07:46The pussycat dolls told you back in the day, be careful what you wish for because you just might get it.
07:51It's none of your business what somebody else thinks of you.
07:54Show up and do you how you know how to do you best and don't be so concerned and overly concerned what somebody else thinks of you.
08:02Song of the day, none of your business by Salt and Pepper, released in 1993 off the The Very Necessary album.
08:11And I'll leave you with this.
08:12Which one was your favorite, Salt or Pepper?
08:16My favorite was Pep.
08:18I love Pep.
08:19I love her swag.
08:20Like, even to this day, as she's, as they're older, you just look at her and you're like, yeah, yeah, that's, that's that one right there.
08:28So, all right.
08:30So tonight I am sampling a variation of wine that I have never sampled before.
08:38I've seen it.
08:39I've heard it.
08:40And, yeah, we're doing it tonight.
08:43Cabernet Franc.
08:44So I am sampling LaRouc.
08:48And this is a product of France.
08:50This is vintage from 2022.
08:54And it says, well, this, of course, is 100% Cabernet Franc because, of course, they can, you know, mix it and blend it with others.
09:03But LaRouc is produced from the vineyards planted in the hills of the famous ancient fortified city.
09:11Of, I know I had this before, let me make sure I get this right, fortified city of Carcassonne in southern France.
09:22The grapes used to make LaRouc benefit from the warmth of the Mediterranean tempered by the cool currents of the Atlantic.
09:31LaRouc is an easy to drink wine that combines the structure, minerals, and dusty rose characteristics of Cabernet Franc with the lively fruitiness of the wines from the south of Frank.
09:47Excuse me.
09:48From the south of France.
09:49They got some interesting spelling and the words are big.
09:56Wines from the south of France.
10:00LaRouc Cabernet Franc is a rich, full-bodied, fresh, floral, and fruity wine with the luscious flavors of violets and cherries.
10:09Enjoyed alone or paired with Mediterranean cuisine, pasta, grilled tuna or salmon, pork, lamb, chicken, and steak.
10:18Like, so apparently this goes with a bunch of different things.
10:22Like, whatever you pick, you probably will be a great winner with this one.
10:27This is 13.5% alcohol volume.
10:30And this is a red wine.
10:32Of course, right here in Jersey when it's like 12 degrees, this works well.
10:37And the wine is just real deep purple.
10:43You get a real deep purple color.
10:45And smells amazing.
10:48Fits right for the season.
10:50And I want to say cheers.
10:52Thank you all so much for joining me in on another episode of Reading Between the Wines.
10:57And while I'm sampling this, I'm going to go ahead and bring in my guest, author slash poet, Birdman313.
11:06What's going on?
11:11How are you?
11:12Hey, how's it going?
11:15Going good, going good.
11:17Sampling this Cabernet Franc.
11:20And it's interesting.
11:24Yeah, yeah.
11:27That's a word, interesting.
11:28I'm not quite sure I'd do it again.
11:30But it's not that it's it's not like I'm going to say it would not be my first pick.
11:39I'd rather do a Cabernet Sauvignon.
11:41Yeah.
11:43Have you have you ever tried it?
11:46I can't say I have, man.
11:50I wasn't really a big wine drinker.
11:53I was more of a whiskey.
11:57Okay.
11:57Okay.
11:58Strong stuff, you know.
12:01Yeah.
12:03Well, it's so good to, you know, have you on.
12:09It's going to be a great, great show tonight.
12:11How are you doing out there in wonderful Texas?
12:15Oh, it's, you know, it's great, man.
12:18You know, the weather is the way I like it.
12:20And that's the good thing.
12:23Well, do me a favor and let me know how do you like it?
12:27What is that weather like out there?
12:2963.
12:32I beg your pardon?
12:3563.
12:37One more time.
12:40It's 63.
12:41It's 63.
12:44Okay.
12:44So when I wake up in the morning, it's like 12, 14, a couple mornings.
12:51It was like nine, eight.
12:53Yeah.
12:55I, I, I, I, like I said, I, since I still have connection back, you know, in Michigan, you
13:00know, a lot of the people I talk with, they'd be my, one of my cousins, he was like, man,
13:06woke up.
13:07It was nine.
13:08It was nine below.
13:09He said, it didn't warm up though.
13:11I'm like, yeah.
13:11He said, yeah, it's zero now.
13:13And I'm like, well, we, we was excited.
13:18Cause it was like in the thirties today.
13:19Can you imagine me being excited?
13:21Cause it's in the thirties.
13:23Oh yeah, I can't trust me.
13:25I've lived.
13:26I lived in that type of weather long enough to, I don't want to have no more to do with
13:32it.
13:33Um, yeah, I feel you on that one.
13:35Anybody who wants to retire and stay in New Jersey.
13:38Yeah.
13:39I think you got to screw loose, but anyway, um, you know, I, I see now, you know, growing
13:48up how, you know, some of my friends, you know, and their family, you know, like when
13:56the winter time come, they would hit, they would hit to South Florida or they would go
14:01to, um, Arizona and I couldn't never understand why until I got older.
14:07Then I'm like, Oh, I know why now, you know, like, like the, yeah.
14:14Like the notorious BIG said, well, if you don't know, now, you know, yes.
14:19Yeah.
14:20Cause if you don't know now, you know, for real, like get out of here, but all right.
14:27So, um, yes, this big week, uh, coming up for everybody, uh, Valentine's day, I don't
14:35want to get too much, but I feel that I need to speak on it because I thought that I was
14:41doing a little bit too much last week.
14:43So for those of you who are celebrating Valentine's day, I'm not here to ruin anything for you.
14:48You enjoy, um, sometimes if you don't know, then it's better.
14:53But this message that I have for everybody out there is when you do know, forget about
14:59the people that don't know and they're just ignorance is bliss is what they say.
15:02But for the people that do know the true origins behind Valentine's day, that's all I have to
15:09put out there and say that if you don't want to know, if you want to continue to be ignorant,
15:14then just, just if, uh, one of the scriptures say, if a man be ignorant, let him be ignorant.
15:21Cool.
15:22Don't go back and forth.
15:23But when you know better, just be careful.
15:27I say you do your little, uh, date on another day.
15:30Don't do it on the 14th.
15:32That's what I say for multiple reasons, but I'm going to get off of that.
15:37I just felt that I had to bring that up again because last week I went in a little too much.
15:44So we're going to move past that.
15:47So, uh, going to get into the do's and don'ts of money.
15:52So you want to give me a number tonight?
15:57Yeah, five.
16:00All right, let's get into five here.
16:05All right.
16:05This is so simple and this is, uh, interesting, but some people may not understand this.
16:15So let's talk about what not to do.
16:18Don't invest your emergency fund in the stock market.
16:21An emergency fund needs to be a hundred percent there for when you need it.
16:27When you invested in stocks, you never know at any given point what it might be worth.
16:31Just think about if you had your emergency savings invested in stocks in 2008 and 2009 when the market dropped more than 30%.
16:40If you had $25,000 set aside in your emergency savings in stocks, your emergency fund value might have fallen $15,000 or so.
16:50So what if you lost your job then, and instead of having $25,000 to help you get through tough times, you only have $15,000.
17:01A savings account at a federally insured bank or credit union is the best vehicle for your emergency savings.
17:09Don't worry if you aren't earning much interest right now.
17:12Now, this isn't an investment.
17:15It's just your safety cushion, safety first.
17:18Now, this would be a first time that I would challenge this here because I absolutely disagree.
17:23Now, I do agree that you should not put your emergency fund in stocks.
17:28Absolutely.
17:29But I do not agree that you should keep it in a regular bank.
17:33Now, that's where I don't agree with this here.
17:36And, again, this is where I say, everybody, please do your own due diligence.
17:40Do your own research.
17:41I am not a financial advisor.
17:43I am not a financial planner.
17:44I am just a financial coach.
17:46But one thing I do know is that why would I put my money in a regular bank account that's giving you, you know, pennies, not even close to 1%?
17:58You can put it in a high-yield savings down and get close to 4%.
18:02That's what I say.
18:03So you think about this here.
18:04I agree with you on that.
18:08You know, I mean, I know a lot of people who did lose money and they just walking around sweating.
18:17So, you know, I mean, a savings account is cool, but you don't get that much interest on it.
18:23It's just a savings account.
18:25Money that you don't touch that you can touch when necessary.
18:31Yeah, yeah.
18:31Yeah, emergency funds are so important because if you don't have your emergency fund in place and a true emergency happens,
18:40the first thing that we do is we run towards credit card debt or we go and take personal loans or we take bank loans and you're right back at a square one in consumer debt.
18:54So, yeah.
18:57All right.
18:59So let's get right on into tonight's assignment here.
19:03We are headed all the way over to Decatur, Georgia.
19:08Now, have you ever been to Georgia?
19:09I've been through there.
19:12Yeah, I've been through it, too.
19:14I think I stopped because I was on my way to Orlando and I just could not go any further.
19:21So I stopped close to Savannah and stayed overnight.
19:25And then I think I went there for business one time and it was just like in and out real quick.
19:30But I've never really spent time in Georgia.
19:32I am.
19:34Georgia.
19:34Yeah, that's where Atlanta is.
19:36I had to think about that.
19:38When I worked at the airport, I used to work in lost luggage, you know, and I.
19:47KLM, that's when they first came in, came in to start coming into the different airports.
19:53And I had to go and I went down there to do some train there, airport personnel on, you know, lost luggage and how to, you know, search for lost luggage and everything.
20:07That sounds like a good job.
20:09Did you enjoy it?
20:10It was fun.
20:11It was fun.
20:12You've seen a man.
20:13You've seen things that, you know, now you think about it, you'd be like, wow, do people really, you know,
20:22do these things, you know, I mean, I've seen FBI agents come through there, man, you know, looking for a wanted criminal, man.
20:31Dude was wanted in Washington, D.C., and he decided to come to Houston.
20:35Then he was going to leave Houston and go back over to Washington, D.C.
20:40He's going to catch a bus, a Greyhound bus from Houston because he was wanted.
20:46And when they came down, one of the ladies I was working with, she said, oh,
20:51there's some big old white boys there.
20:53I was like, yeah.
20:54And they had, I said, oh, look at the bill book.
20:56I said, these cowboys here.
20:58Because they had the hat, they had the boots.
21:01Then they came over and they spoke to all the different personnel from the different, you know,
21:08airlines and told us what was happening.
21:11When old boy, the luggage came on down, everybody got back against the wall, man,
21:16because we, you know, this dude was wanted, you know.
21:22Yeah.
21:22So, I mean, you see, yeah.
21:24Then, you know, like I worked for an international airline and you seen different nationality,
21:31man, and trying to slip food in, trying to slip liquor in and cigarettes and money and all
21:39that, you know.
21:40So, yeah.
21:41Yeah.
21:41I got a chance to see a lot of things.
21:43Interesting.
21:45And I want to add something about Texas.
21:47I had no idea that when you buy cowboy boots, you don't get taxed on it.
21:54I didn't even know that.
21:56Yeah.
21:56I found that out.
21:58Cowboy boots.
21:59It ain't one of my things there, man.
22:02Cowboy boots.
22:03Yeah.
22:03They probably do it on purpose because they want to keep the culture and they want to
22:06keep the look alive.
22:08So, double check that when you're in the store.
22:10Just ask if they're a tax because I heard on some sort of show or something that that's
22:18the only thing that, not one of the only things, but that Texas is known for that, that cowboy
22:23boots, you don't get taxed on them.
22:26I sure will.
22:27Sure will.
22:28You want your cowboy boots?
22:29Head on over to Texas because those things sure are expensive.
22:33Yeah.
22:34So, we are headed to Georgia tonight.
22:38We have Ms. Jasmine.
22:40She says, I didn't realize how much my life was being financed by other people's opinions.
22:45I work hard.
22:45I pay my bills.
22:46I'm responsible, but I also feel like I'm constantly auditioning for approval.
22:51How do I dress?
22:52Where do I eat?
22:53What do I drive?
22:54What do I post?
22:55Every time someone upgrades, I feel behind.
22:58New apartment, new car, new vacation, new level, and I start questioning my own choices.
23:03So, I match it, not because I can afford it, but because I don't want to look like I can't.
23:09I've got friends who think I'm doing well.
23:11They don't see the credit card balances, the late night anxiety, the way I move money around
23:16just to look stable.
23:17Sometimes, I wish I could admit I'm tired of pretending, that I'm tired of performing.
23:23Success.
23:24I don't even know what my real lifestyle would look like if nobody was watching.
23:29How do I step out of comparison when it feels like visibility is everything, Jasmine?
23:35So, what do you have for Ms. Jasmine tonight?
23:40Oh, man, that's a good...
23:41But anyway, can I answer that one question you asked me about the tax on cowboy boots?
23:45Oh, yeah.
23:46That is true.
23:47Oh, interesting.
23:48See that?
23:49Yeah, yeah, yeah.
23:50Diana, she just looked it up for me right quick.
23:53Okay.
23:54Yeah.
23:55Well, she looked it up for both of us, put it like this, so I can let you know.
23:59But now, this one here is kind of like, I was thinking about it, and I'm like, growing
24:08up, we all felt that way at one time when we was younger.
24:13And, you know, it was always, you know, they say you're always looking up to somebody.
24:20And regardless of their lifestyle, you're kind of like, oh, I want to be like that person
24:30there.
24:30I want to have the nice ride, the nice clothes.
24:35I want to have my own place.
24:40But you don't really realize all the stuff that they're going through to keep all this
24:46going on.
24:48I mean, and I even see it more now with, especially, I'm going to bring it up again, especially in
25:00Hollywood.
25:01You cannot keep up.
25:03The Temptations had that song, Keeping Up With The Joneses.
25:07You can't keep up with the Joneses because you never know what all they're doing and all
25:15the bad parts to their life trying to keep up with somebody else because you'll be in
25:21the same situation they're in, and you might not be able to handle it like they handle it.
25:27You know, I mean, there was, you know, growing up, man, in my hometown, I really, I really,
25:40I seen a lot of people and I was like, oh, man, I want to have this nice car.
25:47I want to be able to go to this restaurant.
25:49I want to be able to dress.
25:51You know, I mean, I didn't have no problem with the dressing part, man.
25:53People was always curious about how come, you know, I could dress so well, you know, and
26:01not even work, you know, but it's because all my dad said, you go to school, long you
26:09go to school, you don't have to worry about getting a job.
26:13That was his thing.
26:14So, you know, for me, you know, I mean, I was like, hey, you know, I had people, people
26:24was looking up to me and I didn't realize it because I got teased so much.
26:30And then, you know, like people that play sports, I always want to be just as good as
26:36them.
26:37And then one of my friends I hung out with, he said, hey, man, he said, you'd be surprised
26:45at the people that want to be in your shoes.
26:48You just don't know.
26:51And that's when I started realizing.
26:55And that's the thing that she has to realize is she got to live in her own circle.
27:03She got to live when I say that, I'm saying that she has to know her limitations.
27:11And a lot of us, that's one of the things we don't know is our limitations until it's
27:18too late.
27:22Yeah, this is.
27:24I think if you take it back to the basics and I don't know what it is, again, I'm a work
27:36in progress, but one of the Ten Commandments, thou shall not covet.
27:42I don't know which one it is now that that's one of them.
27:46And I know that for sure is when you want something that somebody else has.
27:52And a lot of times when you want something that somebody else has, you don't know what
27:57their background story is.
27:59You don't know what the struggle was.
28:00You don't know what it took.
28:02You don't know what they're dealing with because what that person has right now, they may not
28:07even want it.
28:08They might have gotten into something and said, oh, shoot.
28:11Now, how do I even get out of this?
28:12But now I got to go ahead and fake the funk and act like I got it like that.
28:15They might not even want it, but see, they're not going to tell you that.
28:20And now you're sitting here wanting what somebody else has.
28:24And sometimes if you want it so bad and you press so bad, just like this situation, what
28:30we got right here, God may say, okay, you know what?
28:36I blocked you from it because I tried to protect you from it.
28:38But yet you want to keep on.
28:40You want to keep on doing what you think is best.
28:43You know what?
28:44Let me go ahead and give it to you.
28:45Now, that could be one scenario.
28:47And just as well as God could give you something, the enemy can give you something, too.
28:54Exactly.
28:56And when you I've learned so much about because I was just the same exact person.
29:03I pull up to work and I see somebody have a nice car and then they might say something
29:08or they might have a little slick comment because, you know, my car may not look like them like
29:12theirs.
29:13So then I go behind the scenes and I'm down on myself and then I go ahead and, you know,
29:18make moves to try to pull up with something that looks equivalent to theirs or better.
29:24And then now I can't sleep at night like I've been there and I've done that before.
29:30Same here.
29:32Same here.
29:32Be careful what you wish for because you just might get it.
29:37And like that song, I have to really go back and listen to that song that you said, keeping
29:42up with the Joneses.
29:43As soon as we get off, I am going to play that.
29:45But I didn't know that they I think you told me once before, but I didn't go back and listen.
29:49But I will this time because that could have been a song of the day, keeping up with the
29:54Joneses.
29:54But that's just what it boils down to.
29:58And.
29:59Go ahead.
30:01No, no, I'm listening.
30:02I'm listening.
30:03I'll wait till you get finished and then I'm going to say something.
30:07I was talking to my daughter a couple of days ago and she said something so profound and
30:12I was so proud in a moment.
30:15I say it here on this show here, and this is a new saying that I'm going to keep drilling
30:19and then the situation that we got here tonight, sometimes there's nothing that you can do.
30:25My daughter said, so, you know, I guess everybody has to hit their own rock bottom because I
30:30had to hit my own rock bottom in 2020.
30:32Now I call it.
30:34Everybody has to hit their own financial rock bottom.
30:38Because you can't warn somebody so many times you can't tell people what to do because they're
30:43going to do what they want to do.
30:44And I posted something today that it's not your job to regulate somebody else's nervous system.
30:49You can't do it because that's when the back and forth, the arguments and the round and
30:53round and a merry-go-round happens.
30:55And you've already lost the game the minute that you go back and forth, going round and round,
31:00arguing or debating with somebody about something that is outside of you,
31:04something that has nothing to do with you.
31:06So for Ms. Jasmine here, you're so concerned and consumed and worried about what somebody else
31:12thinks of you.
31:12And like I said, at the top of the show, it's none of your business, but the fact that you
31:17are making it your business, you know what, maybe you just have to hit your own financial
31:21rock bottom before you'll figure it out.
31:23And that's enough to make you say, oh, absolutely not.
31:26I'm not doing this again because I know when the credit card little statements come through,
31:30not excuse me, the little credit card advertisements or where they, the junk mail that I say comes
31:39in the mail today of trying to get me to sign up for, absolutely not.
31:43It's funny you say that, man.
31:46It's funny you say that.
31:49I have been spending the last week talking with all these different publishers about another
31:55book and the one I spoke to today, he told me, he said something that made me say, man, dude,
32:04I don't even want to deal with you.
32:06When he said, oh, I looked at your book covers and he said, I can tell they are cheaply made.
32:15What?
32:15And that, yeah.
32:18And that there, when he said that, I'm like, yeah, okay, I see where you're going with this.
32:24And, you know, we talked a little bit and then I just told him, then he said, oh, and
32:29he said, I said, I, you know, I already had my poems edit.
32:34I said, I had my own editor.
32:36He said, oh, no, no, no, we'll do that because there may be some things in there that we don't
32:40want in there.
32:41I said, we?
32:42I'm like, okay, this is the reason why I've gone self-publishing because the poems I want
32:52to put in this book is me, is what I've done, not what somebody else think is, you know,
33:00may not be suitable for this because everybody's, you know, thinking is different.
33:05And I've gone through this several times, man, with people that want to publish and they said,
33:14oh, we will let you know whether or not we think this poem, you know, fits this.
33:22And I actually spoke on this with another person, author, who read a poem and he said, I don't
33:30know what's wrong with the poem, but they told me this and told me that.
33:34And he said, so he said, somebody else told me I need to self-publish that way, whatever
33:40I choose, that's what it is.
33:45Exactly.
33:46And I told him, I said, hey, dude, I said, man, I said, that's the thing what I do.
33:53I said, hey, man.
33:54I said, you know, I said, you listen to music?
33:58He was like, yeah.
34:00I said, you know why?
34:02Well, one of the reasons why Motown has such a bad name and they had, you know, they wasn't
34:09generating the money like they once did because Barry Gordy was so, he was so, oh, this is
34:18how I want it.
34:19It had nothing to do with, you know, like the temptations.
34:23And man, I read up on them and it was like, they had like about five or six songs that
34:29they didn't want, that he didn't want in there, like ball of confusion.
34:34What is wrong with ball of confusion?
34:37Papa was a rolling stone.
34:39That's crazy.
34:40That's crazy right there.
34:41And then Marvin Gaye ended up, he put out something and they told him that we don't want songs
34:57like that.
34:58Marvin Gaye said, well, I want, he said, you know what, I'm walking out.
35:03And several other artists went to Barry and said, hey, let this man, he said, you said you
35:11want us to put out what's going on in the world.
35:13He didn't want, he didn't want, he didn't want to put out anything that had drugs or
35:18about the war.
35:21And that was kind of like, I'm like, wow, man, you know, and then I understood why what
35:27Junior Walker told my dad to tell me, cause they know, you know, I mean, sports and music
35:32has always been my thing.
35:34And, you know, Junior Walker said without saying too much before he passed away, without saying
35:42too much, he said, you might want to look at some other labels and that's why they couldn't
35:48hardly all them.
35:50It was, you know, there's so many people out of Detroit chose not to go to Motown because
35:56of his thinking.
35:58You know, this is like probably off topic, but one thing that I didn't like about it
36:05is if I do a record, like, let's say I'm Smokey Robinson and I do a record, why is Marvin
36:12Gaye recording the same song that I am?
36:14Like, I don't like that.
36:17Like there was a lot of that going on.
36:20Yeah.
36:20Why do you have two, two artists on the same label?
36:23Like, don't record my record over again.
36:27I don't care who wrote it.
36:29I don't care.
36:29I'm the one singing it.
36:31I don't want nobody else recording it.
36:32There was a lot of that going on again, totally off topic, but I know that I have looked at
36:39the songs and I'm like, why did this person do it?
36:43And then this one did it over.
36:44Like I know Smokey and Marvin like recorded the same song.
36:49Right.
36:49Right.
36:50Like, but yeah, but yeah, I mean, but yeah, you're right.
36:54Good.
36:55I didn't mean to go off like that.
36:57You know, that's just something that came up.
36:59But I was just saying how, you know, now I, I kind of like, I feel like I have control
37:07over what I want now.
37:09And that's what she got to learn is you're going to see some of your friends pull up on
37:17this, you know, all these different things like a nice car and, but you don't know how
37:23that friend got that car, you know, I did have a few people who said, like you, you just got
37:34through saying, be careful what you wish for because you just might get it.
37:39And I used to hear all these guys, man, you know, we grow up, we'd be like, oh man, she's fine.
37:46She's fine.
37:46Dude say, hey man, why you think she ain't got no man?
37:49You know, he said, you don't want that.
37:54And he said, that's damaged goods there.
37:56Or you hear the women sit back and say, huh, yeah, because he come in here, the reason
38:03why he come in here and he can splurge like this, because he don't have a woman because
38:08he's damaged goods.
38:10And then, you know, some guys, I've had, I had people say that they actually say, oh
38:21man, I should, I should have listened to what you said, you know, so she should be happy
38:28with what she has.
38:31And I know that, that is, that they trust me.
38:34That is hard because there was some people I looked up to or I said, dang man, sure would
38:40like to be like this person, sure would like to be with that person.
38:45And you know what?
38:48Then I had to sit back and sit down and then I got to thinking, you know, maybe I don't
38:55want to be like that person or what they have.
38:58And I had a friend, he used to get a car every two years.
39:05And one day me and my dad was sitting out and I made a comment about it.
39:10My dad said, you want to be like him?
39:12He said, I'm going to tell you something.
39:13His credit going to be so wrecked.
39:16Said about, you know, five more years.
39:18So he ain't going to be able to get a vehicle.
39:21The next time I seen him and he was right.
39:25I looked at him.
39:26I'm like, wow, man, he right.
39:28He got him a car from one of them side lots because he was working at Nabisco.
39:35And, you know, Nabisco, they back then, they would, you know, that's top company making
39:39that money.
39:40And he every two years he get a new vehicle.
39:43And my dad said he's not paying them vehicles off.
39:47Yeah.
39:48Rolling over debt, rolling over debt on top of debt.
39:51Right.
39:52And then he had got, he had got so bad that he lost two wives behind that.
40:00Two of them, man.
40:01Matter of fact, because he used to live right down the street from us and his sister stayed
40:06across the street.
40:07He lost his home.
40:09He lost his wife and he went and got a Porsche and I, and, you know, we used to go ride in
40:16it, you know, and flying down the freeway.
40:18And then, you know, he needed an oil change.
40:24They told him how much it costs to get the oil change.
40:27He pulled a car up at his sister house and left it.
40:31Wow.
40:32Because, you know, those, you know, when you get a foreign car, it's more expensive.
40:36And, you know, I know my dad used to tell me, he said, you don't have, he said, you don't
40:45have that type of job, that kind of money to be riding around in a Porsche.
40:50Or he said, you only had that kind of money to ride on new Cadillac.
40:54He said, be happy with what you got.
40:57I think there's a song that says that too.
41:00It, wait, it, isn't that the song?
41:03Um, riding in the back, some rooftop.
41:10Oh yeah.
41:11I know you're talking about, I know you're talking about, yeah.
41:14Be thankful for what you have.
41:16Yeah.
41:17I forgot what that artist says, but yeah.
41:19Oh, I can't, you know.
41:20You may not, you may not have the gangster.
41:23Yeah.
41:24You know what I'm talking about.
41:25Yeah.
41:25Yeah.
41:26You may not have all the things I have.
41:29Hmm.
41:29But what you got to be thankful for.
41:31Absolutely.
41:31I actually met him because he came to my cousin's house one time by mistake.
41:38It was funny.
41:38He, my cousin knew him, but he came there and my cousin said, oh man, he said, you need
41:43to go down there to that house right down there.
41:45See where all of them is hanging out at?
41:48He said, that's where, he said, that's, that's where your, um, all the Motown singers
41:53hang out at.
41:54Yeah.
41:55That was that, that's that joint.
41:57When it comes on, you know that that's that joint.
41:59Yeah, yeah, yeah.
42:00I know what you're talking about.
42:02And his name gets, you, you think that somebody else is singing it, but it's him.
42:06That must've been the only single that he put out.
42:09I think.
42:10Because he put out other songs, but.
42:12I don't know why they get him confused with, they think that Curtis Mayfield sings that song,
42:16but he doesn't.
42:17No, no, no, no, no, no.
42:20And when Curtis, this guy here was with Motown.
42:23Forgot.
42:23I can't even think of his name now.
42:24You see what I'm saying?
42:25But when you listen to him, you'll think that it's Curtis Mayfield.
42:29Yeah.
42:31Yeah.
42:31Yeah.
42:32Hey, yeah.
42:33That was, you know, if we, we used to be singing that and my dad, he said, well, Daisy, you
42:41don't even know what that song means.
42:42He said, listen to the word.
42:44And then somebody else, it was, we was at the park and we were singing that.
42:47And one, it was one of the older guys, you know, a couple of years old enough.
42:51He said, Hey man, you know what that mean?
42:54He said, Hey, he said, y'all running around here singing it.
42:57He said, but you, do you really understand what it means?
43:02And he said, give me that, give me that basketball.
43:05He said, y'all sit down here.
43:06Let me tell y'all what it means.
43:09Right.
43:09And then he explained to us.
43:11And then I got to thinking, I'm like, wow, man.
43:14Okay.
43:15Then he said, here's the basketball backyard and go back playing.
43:18He said, but most of y'all right out here, it's going to fall right in that trap anyway.
43:25Wow.
43:27We, we, we hit our mark.
43:32We sit here talking about music.
43:34We go, we go past the marks.
43:37Yeah.
43:37Yeah.
43:37Yeah.
43:38I had to let everybody know what you got to tell them and we're going to get up out of
43:42here.
43:42This is a great episode.
43:43Go ahead and let them know what you got going on this week.
43:49Oh, let me see.
43:53I don't have nothing this week yet.
43:56No, cause this is the first week of the month that I have nothing going on at all this week.
44:06I feel you on that one.
44:08Yeah.
44:09It's kind of quiet here.
44:11I know I got this class coming up, restoring your relationship with money coming up this
44:20weekend.
44:22Yeah.
44:23Okay.
44:23Yeah.
44:23Yeah.
44:24Yeah.
44:25It's, it's been, it's been interesting.
44:27It's been a blessing and a whole process as well, too.
44:30We've got a lot of great things coming in the future, but yeah, I'm going to relax before
44:36it starts to ramp up again.
44:38So I'm looking forward to some rest and relaxation.
44:42Yeah, I know.
44:43Yeah.
44:44This week, I probably, I've been working on some, on some bass tunes for some, some poetry
44:49that, um, I've been thinking about doing, you know, just bass, bass tunes.
44:55That makes sense.
44:56And, um, I'm going to go ahead and, um, I have Diana to, well, ask her, would she start,
45:05um, she always go over my manuscript twice.
45:10It's not one time.
45:11She go over twice just to check.
45:13So I'm going to ask her, would she start doing that?
45:16And it probably won't, it probably will be a couple of weeks now before I ask her to really
45:21do that.
45:21But that's what I'm thinking about doing now.
45:25So like I said, this is a quiet week and I'm going to really just, um, chill.
45:33Yeah.
45:33Yeah.
45:34I feel you on that.
45:35I feel you, especially here and freaking, you know, teens, ain't nobody going nowhere.
45:41I think it's going to be like two degrees this weekend.
45:44So I ain't going nowhere.
45:48All right.
45:49I hate to, I hate to bust your bubble on that, but we're getting ready to get up, uh, next
45:53week, be in the seventies.
45:56Well, we'll discuss that next week.
45:58Cause that's, that's some BS.
46:00We getting a little four letter word this weekend.
46:04So whatever.
46:08Yeah.
46:09But thank you so much for joining.
46:11Uh, this has been great.
46:12And I'm gonna, uh, uh, reach out to you, uh, off, offline here.
46:16I just want to talk to you about something when it comes to your book.
46:18So, um, but yeah, I'll be reaching out.
46:22Okay.
46:22All right.
46:23All right.
46:23Y'all take care.
46:25Y'all have a good night and, um, I'll see you when I see you.
46:28Yeah.
46:29Okay.
46:30All right.
46:32Good night.
46:34Good night.
46:34All right.
46:37Ladies and gentlemen, there you have it.
46:39That was author slash poet birdman three, one, three.
46:42I want to thank y'all so much for joining in.
46:44And I also want to give a very special shout out to Leah Abraham.
46:48Y'all go ahead and stay tuned on all my social media platforms.
46:53I'm posting, you know, snippets of our interview that we did this past weekend.
46:59So shout out to Leah Abraham.
47:01Great individual.
47:02Y'all go ahead and check her out.
47:04If you heard something tonight that sparked an interest in you, if you're interested in
47:09debt-free living, I focus on debt-free living from the spiritual, mental, physical, and financial
47:15realm.
47:15You can head on over to laryngains.com and sign up for a free 15 minute consultation.
47:21Again, this is not for everybody.
47:23This is only for the individuals who have hit their financial rock bottom.
47:27You've had enough done with it over.
47:31You want to hit reset.
47:32You want to hit restart.
47:33When you want to do something different, tired of the regular routine journey, head on over
47:39to laryngains.com.
47:40Sign up for the free 15 minute consultation.
47:43We will sit down and discuss and figure out if I am a best match for you.
47:47Because listen, I am not a match for everybody.
47:51If you want to continue to do you reckless behavior.
47:56And again, I'm not saying that this is everybody, but there are some people who want to be debt
48:02free, but their actions are not lining up for what they want in their future.
48:07This is not for everybody.
48:08I'm talking to the people who have been through the mill and back.
48:13They want something different.
48:15They are sick and tired of being sick and tired.
48:19That's it right there.
48:21Those are the folks that I'm speaking to.
48:24Listen, I don't know who I'm speaking to.
48:27I'm only speaking from real life experiences.
48:29I have been there.
48:30I have done that.
48:31And if you hang around here long enough, you will understand and know exactly where I'm
48:36coming from.
48:37Head on over to laryngains.com.
48:40Thank you all so much for tuning in on a podcast.
48:44We are on multiple different streams.
48:48Spotify.
48:49I want to say thank you.
48:51YouTube.
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49:03These are just a few.
49:05Check out wherever you listen to your normal podcast, your favorite podcast, wherever you
49:11listen to.
49:13Check for a 4-in-1 podcast and reading Between the Wines.
49:16And if there is a podcast platform that you notice that we are not on, please DM me.
49:25Email me.
49:25Info at laryngains.com.
49:27And we will try to go ahead and make that happen.
49:29But in the meantime, I want to say thank you all so much.
49:34Please hit that like button.
49:37Please share, subscribe, tag a friend, text a friend, and invite them in because you never
49:44know what you're going to get when you tune into the 4-in-1 podcast and reading Between
49:47Between the Wines.
49:48And I also want to say good morning to y'all out there because, yes, we are on a different
49:56timeline.
49:57So good morning to all of you out there who are starting your day and listening to this
50:02early in the morning.
50:03Thank you all so much for tuning in early in the morning.
50:06I appreciate it.
50:07And for those of you who are turning up, cheers.
50:12If you are starting your day, you're going to turn up a little bit later when you listen
50:16to this later on in the evening.
50:18Thank you, author slash portbirdman313.
50:21I appreciate each and every one of y'all.
50:23And we're just getting started.
50:25And I'm so excited for all of the things that are coming because I can see it.
50:31I feel it and I believe it.
50:33Thank you all so much.
50:36I'll see you when I see you.
50:38Take care.
50:39Five, four, three, two, one.
50:45And that's a wrap on today's episode of the 4-1-1 podcast and reading Between the Wines,
50:50where growth is always on the menu and every pour reveals a little more truth.
50:55The conversation doesn't end here.
50:58Have something to say?
51:00Want to weigh in on tonight's burning questions?
51:03Text us anytime at the official 4-1-1 podcast and reading Between the Wines hotline at 609-200-1098.
51:12Stay plugged in across all social media platforms at Laryngaines.
51:16We're live and in a conversation on Facebook, Instagram, X, TikTok, YouTube, DLive, Twitch,
51:23and Dailymotion.
51:25Prefer to listen on the go?
51:27The audio version is streaming on most major podcast outlets.
51:31Until we meet again, take what you've learned, sip slow, speak truth, and remember,
51:37transformation starts within.
51:39Powered by the Black Diamond Consultations Network.
51:42verse 65
51:45.
51:47coachизsoon
51:51Oh, my God.
51:53I'd love to hear you.
51:55I'd love to hear you.
51:57Thank you for listening.
51:58Thank you for listening.
51:59Thank you for listening.
51:59Have a great dad.
52:00Have a great day.
52:01See you next komen.
52:02Then I will see you next weekend.
52:03Hear your three, two, three, two, one, for 24-1, two, three.
52:05Of course you can borrow us all of the vast amounts.
52:07But we're going out this one.
52:07Elaine, please.
52:07It's one of the vast amounts of shit Will?
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