- 2 days ago
Tv, Only Fools And Horses S04E06 - Watching The Girls Go By.
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00:00Stick a bunny in me pocket
00:06I'll fetch the suitcase from the van
00:09Cause if you are the best
00:13But you don't ask questions
00:15Then brother, I'm your man
00:17Cause where it all comes from is a mystery
00:21It's like the changing of the seasons
00:24And the tides of the sea
00:26But is the one that's driving me bizarre
00:29Why do only fools and horses work
00:33La-la-la-la
00:34La-la-la-la
00:36La-la-la-la
00:38La-la-la-la-la
00:40I'm getting rid of this old white car, dear
00:43It's good, isn't it?
00:59I like that
01:00Might be done doing no more, though
01:02Here, Trey, you come into the do Saturday night
01:05I've only got two tickets left
01:06You put them down to me, mate
01:07Good boy
01:08Now, they're $2.50 each
01:09You can have the pair for a fiver
01:10You're a pal
01:11Right, I'll go for a tenure on that one
01:17Royal flush
01:19Get out of that, my son
01:20I don't know where you're pulling them from tonight, doll boy
01:23I really don't
01:24Now, listen, you crittinous little irks
01:33There is a three-yard exclusion zone around this table
01:37And if another of your missiles should fall within it
01:40I will personally shove it, point, sharp, feathers and all
01:44Right up your gearbox
01:45Do I make myself clear?
01:48You're all right, boys
01:49Sweet, get your drift
01:50Well, just be aware, then, eh?
01:52Just be aware
01:54Bloody peasants
02:02That's what I like about you, boys
02:03See, you've always been such a good loser
02:05Yeah, I've had plenty of bloody practice where you're concerned, haven't I?
02:08Mike says no gambling
02:09He's frightened of losing his licence
02:11Trigger, Mike all knows very well what he's going to do with his bloody licence
02:14I'm trying to win my money back here
02:16All right, all right, there's plenty of time, boys, see
02:18So now I'll go and get some drinks
02:19What do you want, scotch?
02:20Scotch, cheers, Del
02:21All right, Tommy
02:24Hello, Del
02:25Yeah, listen, tell the enemy that I haven't forgot about a sandwich toaster
02:28I'll pop it round to her in the morning, all right?
02:30Michael, please, three scotches, if you don't mind
02:32Del, I've told you before, do not gamble in the pub
02:36I'll lose my licence
02:38Well, why?
02:39No, it's only a friendly game
02:40Friendly? Friendly?
02:42I've seen at least 50 quid change hands in here tonight
02:44That's what I mean, it's a friendly game
02:46Here, I'll stick her in for the bottle, will you?
02:48I'm in a mood for life
02:50Oh, Del, Del
02:51Hello
02:51Do you want tickets for the do Saturday night?
02:53I've only got two left
02:54Yeah, go on then, I'll have them
02:55Yeah, Maureen, give them to Del, will you?
02:58And get the money
03:00That's a five, I'm
03:02Yeah, all right, go on
03:02Get the money yourself, help yourself
03:04They're in me pocket
03:04There's no money in there
03:15I know, it's in me jacket pocket
03:16I've bought it yourself
03:19Yes, wine, you really are
03:21Yeah, I'll take a pound for yourself
03:22I will, thanks very much
03:24Good
03:25And thank you very much
03:27Oh, Maureen
03:33There's vodka and lemonade, please
03:35Vodka and lemonade
03:36Oi, Mickey, all right?
03:38We're going down to pizza palace later on then
03:40Well, we're going down now
03:42But, uh, we're with the birds, see
03:43Oh, right, yeah
03:46Well, didn't fancy a pizza, to be honest
03:48You know, got to be up early
03:50Market and all that
03:51Hey, Rudney, uh
03:52Do you want tickets for the do Saturday night?
03:54Only, uh, I've only got two left
03:55Well, he won't want two, will he, Mike?
03:58Why won't I want two?
03:59Well, he won't be bringing a bird, will you?
04:01Why shouldn't I be bringing a bird?
04:03Well, there's no reason, Rodney
04:04But why break the habits of a lifetime, eh?
04:08Yeah, I'll have to two, Mike, how much?
04:10Good boy, it's a fiver
04:11Who are you bringing in?
04:16Your Uncle Albert?
04:18I'm bringing a girl
04:19Oh, give over, Rodney
04:21I'm bringing a girl
04:22What's her name?
04:23Eh?
04:24What's her name?
04:26It's none of your business
04:27You have to find out on Saturday night, won't you?
04:30Who is it?
04:32Yeah, it's not that sort from the fishmongers, is it?
04:34No, it ain't that sort from the fishmongers, actually
04:37This one happens to be in show business
04:39Show business?
04:42You're a liar
04:43I'm telling you the truth, Mickey
04:44You want to see her and all
04:45She's a right brahma
04:46Well, I've got ten
04:48Says you won't bring a bird on Saturday night
04:50Make it twenty
04:51All right, twenty
04:52Right
04:52Oi, oi, oi, oi
04:53What's all the noise here?
04:54It's just a drink here
04:55It's better me I ain't got a bird to drink than I do on Saturday
04:58Oh, you haven't, have you?
05:01Well, really?
05:03Yes
05:03Go on then, Rodney, go on
05:06Take him the mouth you get
05:08Go on
05:09I'll tell you what
05:11Make it thirty
05:11Make it forty if you like
05:15Go on
05:16Go on, Rodney
05:17I know, I know
05:20Let's make it a nice round fifty, eh?
05:24You're on
05:25I'll see you Saturday
05:27And you'd better bring your money with you
05:29Got more front than Buckingham Palace, ain't I?
05:32Yeah, don't worry
05:33Come Saturday night
05:34You'll be the one that's laughing, won't you?
05:36Yeah
05:36Yeah, that's it
05:37Come on, come and sit down over here and hold your noise, all right?
05:40Yeah, Dave
05:40You can sit here, I'm going
05:42Are we playing cards or what?
05:44Yeah, come on
05:45Hey, about bloody time and all
05:46Right, it'll be down to you then, Boise
05:48Here
05:48Keep your money to yourself, will you?
05:50Because of old Orkai
05:51Oh, yeah
05:51Right
05:52Okay, I will go a pound
05:55Yeah, go on
05:56I'll have some of that, two pounds
05:57Four
05:57Eight
05:59Sixteen
06:00Thirty-two
06:01Sixty-four
06:02It's going to cost you 128 to see me, Del Boy
06:13Just a minute, Boise
06:14Just a minute
06:15It's supposed to be a friendly game, ain't it?
06:16Friendly is like the start of World War III, ain't it?
06:19Well, what can we do, Del Boy?
06:20It's just the way the bits have gone
06:21I'll tell you what we can do
06:23We can both take our bets back and start all over again, eh?
06:26And just, you know, try to play a little more sensibly
06:29All right
06:29All right, Del Boy
06:31Sit down
06:31Anything you say
06:33Right
06:34Eight pound
06:35I'll see ya
06:36I've got three tenths
06:41Oh, well, that beats me out of sight, Boise
06:43You well played, my son
06:44Good night
06:45Come on, Roddy
06:46Let's come on
06:46Can I sit to my sit
06:55I'll see ya
06:55Well, you should have seen his face, Uncle
06:58He didn't know whether to laugh or cry
07:00It was a picture, wasn't it, Rodders, eh?
07:01Eh?
07:02Boise's face when I tucked him up the cards
07:05Yeah, yeah, it was terrific
07:06What's the matter with you, Rodney?
07:09Nothing
07:10Come on, Rodders
07:12Cheer up
07:13Payday tomorrow
07:14And then it's Saturday
07:15When you take Malfi Mickey to the cleaners
07:17Yeah, well, that's what's bothering me, huh?
07:19Oh, Rodney
07:20You ain't starting to feel sympathy for him, have you?
07:22I mean, he's got far too much rabbit
07:24It's about time he was put in his place
07:25Once and for all, that boy
07:26Del, I ain't got a girl for Saturday night
07:29I ain't got a girl for any night
07:31You ain't got
07:33Well, why did you keep upping the ante?
07:37You told me to
07:38You were still behind me going
07:41Go on, Rodney
07:41Go on, my son
07:42That's because you said you had a girl
07:44And I believed you
07:45Yeah, well, I won't tell him the complete truth
07:47Tell him the complete truth?
07:49You were lying through your back bloody teeth
07:51You stupid little burk
07:53He stands to lose a 50 on this
07:55Why'd you have to tell lies, Rodney?
07:57Yes
07:58It was pride talking, wasn't it?
08:01I mean, there was Mickey Pierce and all the others
08:03And they was laughing at me
08:04So I pretended, I lied
08:06Anyway, what's to say I won't meet a girl by Saturday night?
08:09That's the spirit, Rodney
08:11There's loads of girls on this estate
08:13One of them must be willing to go out with you
08:15Well, the thing is, I've been out with most of them in the past
08:18Well, didn't they like you?
08:20Well, they haven't started a fan club yet, have they, Rodney?
08:24No, they haven't, have they?
08:26Yeah, I've got it
08:27I've got it
08:28What about that tubby girl who lives down by the community all there?
08:32She'll go out with you, Rodney
08:33Because she ain't got a full deck
08:34I will sort this one out of my own, thank you, do it
08:39All right, all right, up to you
08:40Yeah, what about the girl from the fishmongers?
08:42No, thank you, Uncle
08:43Got it, cracked it
08:46Cracked it
08:47Remember a couple of months ago when I took you out on that blind date?
08:50Remember it?
08:51I'm still having therapy for it
08:53Well, I'm not honestly suggesting I spend another evening with Big Brenda
08:58Just because she's taller than you
09:01Anyway, I heard she was a very sporting girl
09:04Yeah
09:04But when you told me she was a sporting girl
09:06I didn't realise you meant she was Southern Area's shot put champion
09:09No, you seemed to get on with her very well
09:13You was laughing and dancing and that
09:15Dale, I was scared of her
09:16Anyway, if you think I'm walking into the Nags Head on Saturday night
09:21With Miss Anabolic Steroid on my arm
09:23You've got another thought coming
09:24I could not stand another night of
09:27So I said to Zola
09:28And Zola said to me
09:29Hold up
09:31You'll have to sort it out yourself, Rodney
09:33I mean, you know, I've done my best, haven't I?
09:36You want to be careful, Rodney
09:37Look at that little thing you took the pictures the other week
09:40Lucky not to get your collar felt
09:42Now, that's not fair
09:43She swore blind to me she was 18
09:45That's right
09:46How did Rodney know she was only nine?
09:50She was 16 that month
09:53Sorry, you're...
09:53Anyway, I didn't suspect nothing
09:55Until she paid the fare with a school bus pass
09:57And she did all the chatting up, you know
10:00I mean, she invited me to the pictures
10:02Well, she had to, didn't she?
10:03They wouldn't let her in without an adult
10:05Get off my back, you two, I'm gonna beat
10:09Rodney
10:14Listen
10:15Are you sure you don't want me to phone up that big Brenda?
10:19No, no, no, no
10:20Oi, what's your language?
10:22These walls, they're paper thin
10:24I don't know, Uncle
10:27I don't know what the younger generation's coming to
10:29I can't even swear without effing and blinding
10:32You know
10:32Yeah, yeah
10:37All right then, darling, yeah
10:39Now, it's been lovely hearing your voice after all these years
10:42Okay
10:43See you around then
10:44Bonjour
10:45Oh, well, that's it
10:47That's it, that was the last one
10:49Last what?
10:51Oh, been phoning around some of me old girlfriends
10:53See if I could pull something out of the hat for Rodney
10:55No luck
10:56Tell you what, Uncle
10:58Phoning around some of your old birds
10:59That'll make you feel your age
11:01Any phone calls for me today?
11:04Yeah, that young Mickey Pierce called
11:06Said he had a phone number of a lonely arts club for Rodney
11:09Oh, he's a leery little sod he is
11:11I'd like to tuck him up, I really would
11:13Oh, well
11:14Hurry on
11:15All right, Rodney?
11:17Yeah
11:17Bloody hell
11:20That reminds me I'm playing dominoes down the Legion tonight
11:24What have you done to yourself?
11:32Do you know what you see before you is the new me?
11:35The old Rodney Trotter is dead
11:37Long live the king
11:38You look like a licorice all sort
11:41You haven't got to wear it, have you?
11:43No, that's too true, I ain't
11:45Look, I've still got a couple of hours left to win that bet
11:48I'm going to go out and see if I can't bump into a right brahma
11:50Make sure you don't bump into her on a zebra crossing
11:53You know what I mean?
11:54It looks a bit like now you see me
11:56Now you don't, you know what I mean?
11:57Rodney, use your loaf
11:58You're never going to pull a tart dressed up like Bertie Bassett
12:01You ain't getting to me, Dale, so save your breath
12:06You know what would look good on you, Rodney?
12:10A big white Stetson
12:11Do you know what would look good on you, Albert?
12:14A Doberman pincher
12:15All right, all right
12:17Come on, you two
12:18Pack it in
12:19Listen
12:20Do you want me to come with you?
12:22You can if you like, I don't care
12:23All right
12:23I'll come with you
12:24What are you going to wear?
12:26Sunglasses, I should think
12:27All right, calm down
12:29Calm down
12:30Come on, calm down
12:31Have a cup of tea
12:32And will you stop winding him up?
12:35I ain't said a word
12:35No, well just make sure you don't then
12:37I don't know what it is
12:45But I keep getting this yearning
12:47To put me Bobby Crush LP on
12:48All right
12:51Where, Rodney, where did you get that?
12:54Hold it off Paddy the Greek
12:55Paddy the Greek?
12:58That's the rubbish I sold him last Monday
13:00When I offered it to you then
13:02You weren't interested
13:03Yeah, I know
13:04But he was cheaper than you
13:05Yeah, well I've got to cover me overheads, haven't I?
13:09I mean, there's got to be easier ways
13:11To win a bet than this, haven't there?
13:13Yeah, there's something I don't understand
13:15All these young girls on the estate
13:17That you take up
13:18Yeah, what about them?
13:19How come none of them want to see you again?
13:21Yeah, that is a bit of a mystery, isn't it?
13:22Ain't that?
13:23All right
13:24Seeing as how it's national
13:26Let's take the piss out of Rodney week
13:28I'll tell you
13:29Hmm?
13:30I frighten them off
13:31All right?
13:32Frighten them off?
13:34Yeah, well
13:34He's got this thing about uniforms, hasn't he?
13:36You know what I mean?
13:37It's got nothing to do with uniforms
13:39Oh, God
13:40Got over that phase months ago
13:42All right
13:44Look, to morons like Mickey Pierce
13:46And some of the others
13:49A woman is not a person to talk to
13:52Someone to relate to
13:53Oh, no
13:54A woman is just a trinket
13:56To bolster their masculinity
13:58You know, something to hang on their arm
14:00To prove their macho image
14:02Well, I'm different
14:03No, no
14:08There's nothing like that about it
14:09Either I like a girl
14:13Or I don't
14:14If I don't like her
14:15I don't see her no more, right?
14:17But if I do like her
14:18I...
14:19I tend to get a bit serious
14:21And...
14:22Well, I think that's what's frightening them off
14:24They're young, you know
14:26They want to see a bit of life
14:27Perhaps they don't want a wally like me
14:29Drooling around them
14:30I'll just fall in love too easy
14:33That's my trouble
14:34It's a fat family trait, Del
14:37Us trotters wear our hearts on our sleeves
14:39Leave it out
14:40He wears his heart and his wranglers
14:42There you go again, see?
14:45You don't know what love is, Rodney
14:47You haven't had enough experience to know
14:49I'll bet you have though, won't you?
14:50I certainly have, bruv
14:52I am
14:52Coving in emotional scars, me
14:54I was in love once
14:57Yeah, terrific
14:58You see, Rodders
14:59I used to have this vision of love
15:03I used to imagine that me
15:07Me and my sweetheart
15:09Were running in slow motion
15:11Through a field of buttercups
15:13We're both, you know
15:16We're both like that
15:17Dressed in white
15:18And, you know
15:19Like I'd done a bit of weight
15:20And suddenly
15:23There
15:24In the background
15:26I can hear Semprini's orchestra
15:29Playing the theme tune
15:30From Dr. Zhivago
15:32Where's he going?
15:36Probably going to be sick
15:37Shut up and listen, listen, will you?
15:40Then again you see another time
15:42Another time I imagine
15:44At the top of an alpine peak
15:46Looking out across the mountains
15:48And the forests
15:50It's just like
15:51As if we're the last two people
15:54Left alive in the world
15:56Suddenly
15:58Behind us you hear
16:00The sound of a lone violin
16:03Semprini on a skiing holiday, is it?
16:07Will you shut up and listen?
16:08Oh, come on, Dale
16:09That ain't a vision of love
16:10It's a yoghurt commercial
16:11Oh, well, thank you very much
16:14Here I am
16:14Trying to give you
16:15Give you the benefit of my experience
16:16And what do you do, ain't?
16:17You throw it back in my face
16:19Well, thank
16:20What's this?
16:22That's Elga
16:23Elga?
16:24Elgar who?
16:25I was in love with her
16:26I don't think I ever really stopped loving her
16:29Yeah, well, it's getting on, ain't it?
16:31If we're going down to clubs
16:32It was in 1946
16:34We sailed into Hamburg
16:36To pick up some prisoners of war
16:38Elga was working in a bar near the docks
16:41She was the most beautiful woman I've ever seen
16:45I fell in love with her the moment I saw her
16:48Little finger on her right hand was missing
16:52That's her
16:54Caught her hand in the towel, did she?
17:00No, she lost it when her home was bombed
17:03Her entire family was wiped out
17:05Sorry
17:07I asked her to marry me
17:09She said no
17:10Just like that
17:12No
17:12See, I almost took her gestures of friendship as tokens of love
17:16I suppose it was all for the best, really
17:19You see, the authorities didn't like us fraternising with the Germans
17:23And I was still married to your Aunt Ada
17:25And she'd have kicked up a stink
17:28It's funny, you know
17:30But even after all this time
17:32If ever I'm watching a German war film
17:34And I heard the word nine
17:36I always think of Elga
17:39What, because that's how many fingers she had?
17:48It's the German word for no
17:50I'll put this back in my box
17:54Yeah, that's it
17:54Go on, you put it somewhere safe
17:56I think in her own way she loved me
17:59She never used to charge me as much as the other lads
18:03He tells a good story, doesn't he, eh?
18:12Gets you right here, doesn't it, eh?
18:14Like bile
18:15Come on
18:16Come on, shake a leg
18:19No, I don't think I'll bother, though
18:21Yeah, come on, Ronnie
18:22Come on, you've got to make an effort
18:23I'm never going to pull a bird, am I?
18:25Yes, you are
18:26Come on, like
18:27Remember, he who dares wins
18:29Yeah, but they don't work for me, though
18:31I'll just have to pay Mickey the money
18:32No, you don't
18:33Listen, I'll tell you what you're going to do
18:34Listen, I'll buy the bet off you
18:35Do what?
18:36I'll buy the bet off you, right?
18:38Now, if we win, I collect the 50
18:40If we lose, I pay out
18:42How's that grabbing?
18:43Yeah, all right, then
18:44Ah, good boy
18:45You know it makes sense
18:46Yeah
18:46Now, come on, then
18:47We're going to go down
18:48And give those dance halls
18:49A bit of an hammering tonight
18:50Come on, let's twist again
18:52Yeah, like it loves
18:54Well, this time, you know
18:55Let's not just go crashing in there, right?
18:57Kick them in the ankles
18:58And want to dance, darling, you know
18:59Let's have a bit of decorum this time, eh?
19:02A bit of sophistication
19:03What are you talking about?
19:04Sophistication is my middle name
19:06Yeah, I know
19:06I know
19:07I just forgot
19:08Well, that's all right, then
19:09Don't you worry
19:09Listen, I'm just going to have a wash
19:11Clean pants
19:12Splash a brew, be with you in a minute
19:13All right, sir?
19:16Terrific
19:16Oh, I don't know
19:21It's a cat stone, me
19:22A right blinding night
19:23This has turned out to be, ain't it, eh?
19:26God, we've been everywhere
19:27Empire, Leicester Square
19:28Amherst Smith Palace
19:29You name it, we've danced there
19:31And the only thing I've pulled
19:32Is a ligament in me back
19:33Trying to do that bloody break dancing
19:35Surely to goodness, Rodney
19:38One of them girls would have done ya
19:39No, no, they wouldn't, girl
19:40This one's got to be something a bit special
19:42I told Mickey she was in show business
19:44You know, made her out to be a bit of a film star
19:47God, you didn't tell me that
19:49When I took that bat off you, did ya?
19:50No
19:51No, you saucy little git
19:52Honestly, I don't
19:54Oh, come
19:55Put your tookus down there
19:57Come on, for heaven's sake
19:58Take the weight off it
20:00Well, how are we going to find
20:04A Bo Derek look-alike in Beckham?
20:07If it had been Bo Diddley
20:09We'd have been laughing
20:09We ain't going to find her here, are we?
20:13What'd you bring us in here for?
20:14Looks like a trouble place to me
20:16It's not a trouble place
20:17Del, there's dry blood on the door handle
20:19Clean as night off
20:21Don't worry
20:22Here, look at that
20:23Down there, those two there
20:25Those two there
20:25Do I look like St George?
20:31Now, look at that one
20:33She's older than a Mary Rose
20:35She's all right
20:38I thought you said that this girlfriend of yours
20:40Was a bit of a film star
20:41Betty Davis is a film star
20:43So, it was Rin Tin Tin
20:45But I ain't had a bloody Alsatian
20:46I don't know, it hasn't bothered you other years
20:50Has it, eh?
20:53Girl, look at the state of her, eh?
20:54Eh?
20:55What?
20:56You can see her wrinkles from here
20:57All right, all right
20:58You've got a face like a bulldog chewing a wasp, isn't she?
21:02Believe that
21:03All right, go on
21:04You can have the best one
21:06That is the best one
21:07I don't know what I'm going to do
21:11I just bloody well give up with you
21:12I really do
21:13What are you drinking?
21:14No, God
21:14That's all you're going to get
21:15Oi, Orlando
21:16Let's
21:17Hey, Bonnie
21:18Bonnie
21:19Bonnie
21:20How are you?
21:21How are you?
21:21Hello, fresh
21:22How are you?
21:23Oh, all right
21:24You know, I'm doing a bit here
21:25I'm doing a bit there
21:25You know me
21:26What are you doing these days?
21:28You're still stripping, are you?
21:29I'm not a stripper, Dale
21:30I'm an exotic dancer
21:31Ah, yeah
21:32Of course you are
21:33Sorry
21:33You still take your clothes off, though, don't you?
21:35Well, it's part of the act
21:36Yeah, yeah
21:37Here, I heard you got into a bit of trouble the other week
21:39What was that?
21:40Did you hear about that?
21:41Yeah
21:41Bloody drug-crazed tourist
21:43He jumped up on the stage after me
21:45He tried to strangle me, you know
21:47Yeah, I know
21:47Some I heard
21:48How is the snake now?
21:51Oh, he got over it
21:53Oh, good, good
21:54I've got the sack for most of me clubs now
21:56Oh, yeah
21:57Orlando
21:58Yeah, what's that then?
22:00Well, to be honest with you, Dale
22:01I've been hitting the bottle a bit too much
22:02Oh, have you?
22:03Doctor says I've got a drink problem
22:05I says to him
22:06I ain't got no problem
22:07I like it
22:08Well, of course
22:10Me real problem is frustration
22:12Perhaps I could help you out, yeah
22:14Good night
22:15I shouldn't be a stripper, Dale
22:17Oh, I don't know
22:17I think it suits you
22:18Deep down inside, I'm a singer
22:20But no-one will take me seriously
22:23Oh, I know
22:24Gives you the hump, doesn't it, eh?
22:27Yeah, just a minute
22:28You know my local, don't you?
22:30The nags head
22:31Yeah
22:31Well, there's a bit of a do on there tomorrow night
22:33Do you fancy going?
22:34Well, they let me sing there?
22:35Well, yeah
22:36They'll insist
22:36All right, then
22:37Gonna pick me up?
22:38No, well, you see
22:39You won't be going with me
22:40Who am I going with, then?
22:42It's all right
22:43You'll be going with my dopey little brother over there
22:45Where?
22:47He's over there
22:47He's over there
22:48At that table
22:49There, look
22:49Well, there's no one there
22:51Just some geezer
22:52Dressed up like a negative
22:54Yeah, that's
22:54That's him
22:57Oh, Dale
22:57Now, come on
22:58Look, I stand to win a bet
22:59Oh, God
23:00This is some funny
23:01I'm on for a 50 here, all right?
23:03I'll tell you what
23:03Come on
23:04Look
23:04There's a score in it for yourself
23:06Go on
23:07All right
23:08Go on, then
23:09What?
23:10Well, you've got to go over there, haven't you?
23:11When you've got to chat
23:12It might make it look real
23:13Go on
23:13That's it
23:15Use your charm, girl
23:16Go on
23:16Hi
23:26Whatcha?
23:29Is this anyone's seat?
23:32Uh, no
23:33No
23:34My name's Yvonne
23:40Oh, I'm Rudd
23:41I, um, ain't seen you here before
23:48Nah
23:48Well, there's, uh
23:49Probably something to do with the fact that I've never actually been here before
23:53So, um
23:56Do you work here?
23:58Oh, no
23:59I'm, uh
23:59I'm in show business
24:01Really?
24:04You ain't done any films, have you?
24:05Oh, well, there was a couple when I was younger
24:08But I'd rather not talk about it
24:10I had just called in here tonight on the off chance
24:13I was hoping I might bump into some friends
24:16I heard someone was throwing a party tomorrow night
24:20Yeah?
24:21But now it looks as though I'd have to spend the evening in on my own
24:26Oh
24:27Yes, I've got absolutely nothing to do tomorrow night
24:32Listen, um
24:36I've got a couple of tickets for a do
24:38Um, it's only a pub
24:39Oh, I'd love to go with you
24:41Thank you
24:41Uh, it starts about 8.30
24:43Oh, I see you there
24:44Well, hold on
24:45I'd better write the address down for you
24:46Oh, it's all right
24:47I know where the nag's head is
24:48Must rush
24:49Oh
24:49Here you go
24:55Don't tell me you've pulled
24:59I have
24:59You have
25:01Oh, yeah
25:01Now, Rodney
25:14Rodney, listen
25:15Now, listen to me
25:16Let me explain
25:16Before I do something that you'll regret
25:19Um, I'll explain to you, see
25:21No, that wasn't my
25:22No, that's me, Del
25:23Oh, it's you
25:24Come on in
25:25Where's Rodney?
25:25He's coming up the stairs
25:27Oh, he's out of your blood, Del
25:28Look, it wasn't my fault
25:30Well, not entirely
25:32I only did it so that he could win the bet
25:35I'm sure in the cold light of day
25:37Rodney will realise that Bonnie's behaviour wasn't that bad
25:41Oh, it was bad, Del
25:42It was very bad
25:44At one point Rodney started crying
25:46I'm gonna kill you
25:55Be careful now, listen
25:57Don't be a plonker all you like
25:58You set her up to going out with me
26:01I did not set her up
26:03I paid her
26:04You paid her?
26:06Well, that's worse
26:07No, listen
26:07Come here
26:08All right, now listen
26:09I only did it for you to win the bet
26:11And to save your pride
26:11My pride?
26:13Tonight in front of half of Peckham
26:15The bird I told everyone was my girlfriend
26:18Stood on the counter and took all her clothes off
26:20Don't think anyone noticed, Rodney
26:24Well, you certainly noticed, Uncle
26:27Because you stood on a chair to notice
26:30Yeah
26:30And at one point he almost knocked you off
26:33That's right
26:33He said
26:34No, listen
26:34All right, so she had one too many gins
26:38I didn't know she had a drink problem
26:40Oh
26:40I found out a couple of new things about her as well
26:43I didn't know she could juggle like ale bottles
26:46I didn't know she couldn't sing
26:48And where did that snake come from?
26:51I don't know
26:52Nobody knows where it went either
26:54That's it, isn't it?
26:57I will never, ever live this evening down
27:00This is the sort of stuff that legends are made of, right?
27:06I was there telling everyone how me and Yvonne was thinking of getting engaged
27:09And I turned round and there she is, stop
27:12With nothing on
27:14I had her singing in one ear and it's in Sid and the other
27:18Yeah, but you won your bet, didn't you?
27:22Yeah, I won a bet, all right
27:23Ah, good boy
27:24Did Mickey Pierce pay up?
27:26Yeah, he paid up
27:27He was laughing, but he paid up
27:29All right, come on, come on
27:30Let's have the 50
27:31What's this?
27:3650 pence?
27:38Yeah
27:38Oh, I bet I know what you thought
27:42You and that Mickey
27:48You and that Mickey Pierce are like a couple of bleeding gigs
27:49I can't wait to tell the boys down the market
27:52Rodney's girl did a strip
27:54And Del Boy won a 50 pence bet
27:56Uncle, stand very still
28:01There is a snake in the hood of your duffel coat
28:05Oh, God, there is two
28:09Look at it, it's a big one
28:11Come on, quick
28:13Go down and phone the vets, quickly
28:15Dad, we'll see you next time
28:29Fucking
28:30Push-push-push-push-purppp
28:31Have a protein
28:33night
28:35New
28:40Push, push, push, push, push, push, push.
28:43No income tax, no VAT.
28:46No money back, no guarantee.
28:50Black or white, rich or broke.
28:53We'll cut prices and a straw.
28:58God bless Hooky Street.
29:01Viva Hooky Street.
29:04Long live Hooky Street.
29:06Same and defeat Hooky Street.
29:10Magnifique Hooky Street.
29:14Hooky Street.
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