- 3 months ago
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00:00:00Welcome to the Chris Gethard Show!
00:00:02One, two, three, four!
00:00:12Oh, come take a ride!
00:00:14Come take a ride!
00:00:16It's the weirdest guy, no blues Wednesday night!
00:00:18It's Wednesday night!
00:00:20And out here did he go!
00:00:22The Chris Gethard Show!
00:00:24Chris Gethard Show!
00:00:26Chris Gethard Show!
00:00:28The Chris Gethard Show!
00:00:34Thank you!
00:00:36Thank you everyone!
00:00:38Thank you very much!
00:00:40Welcome to the show everybody, my name is Chris Gethard.
00:00:42Welcome to the Chris Gethard Show.
00:00:44Very psyched to have you here on what promises to be a very strange, interesting evening.
00:00:48Because as everyone knows, normally this show is all for comedy nerds.
00:00:52We do all sorts of comedy nerds. Dirty.
00:00:54It's a dirty game.
00:00:56Harry and Michael.
00:00:58Harry, everyone on our team refers to you as evil Zach Woods due to your vague resemblance to a friend of ours.
00:01:02It happens.
00:01:04Yeah.
00:01:06How do you feel about the rivalry?
00:01:08Do you take it as seriously as we do?
00:01:10I mean, we have other things that we talk about, but that's when we're sleeping.
00:01:12We're really focused.
00:01:14I mean, we came in to play for this game and we gave all we could give.
00:01:18Once we found out that there was a rivalry, we took it really seriously.
00:01:22I would say, for the first three to four months of the rivalry, you were not aware of the rivalry.
00:01:26But we would send angry emails up to each other.
00:01:28I would often send emails right before we played you quoting George Patton.
00:01:32Did you ever know that?
00:01:34I didn't know that, no.
00:01:36That's the controversial thing about this game.
00:01:38I don't even know who half the people playing with you are.
00:01:40It was the first time we ever, you invited everyone who ever played for your team.
00:01:43It was a Forskins alumni game.
00:01:44It was a little bit of, I think, a little bit of a cheap move.
00:01:47Yeah.
00:01:48You would know cheap moves.
00:01:49Wow.
00:01:50Oh.
00:01:51Burned.
00:01:52Burned for the first time tonight.
00:01:53Also, just so everybody knows, that's the human fish.
00:01:56He's half man, half fish.
00:01:58Yeah.
00:01:59Now, guys, throughout the game, at any point, if you want his expert opinion, you can go
00:02:03to it.
00:02:04Just know, he can only speak in terms of blank versus blank.
00:02:07So, was that good basketball versus bad basketball?
00:02:10Do you like that, you know, jumpers versus layups?
00:02:13Bad basketball.
00:02:14That was bad basketball.
00:02:15So, here's the first half of our game.
00:02:17I'm going to hand it off to the Basketball Jones.
00:02:19All right.
00:02:20Let's get started.
00:02:21Here we go.
00:02:22We are in an elementary school.
00:02:23There's no doubt about that.
00:02:25I like that the quick cuts make you guys look really fast.
00:02:29How many cameras were we talking here, Chris, on this production?
00:02:32There's six cameras, including a crane, which we were very proud of.
00:02:35There's a crane shot.
00:02:36It's very impressive.
00:02:38How did you convince Brian Cardinal to play on the bottom of the zone?
00:02:43So, the Forskid's moving the ball pretty well here.
00:02:45There's some talent on this team.
00:02:46Yeah, unselfish.
00:02:47It looks like there's not a lot of room to work out there.
00:02:50Nice jumper there by Facemask, we'll call him.
00:02:53Facemask, that's what we call him as well.
00:02:54Okay, good.
00:02:55He's very good at guys.
00:02:56This gentleman's already pissed off here.
00:02:57Yeah, he's pissed.
00:02:58I'm down two sets.
00:02:59We're two seconds into the game, sir.
00:03:01Now, would you guys say that it's fair?
00:03:04I personally find the Facemask guy infuriating just because of the Facemask.
00:03:08Can we talk to him about this Facemask?
00:03:09Yeah, where is Facemask?
00:03:10Facemask is right here.
00:03:11Facemask, why don't you come over this way so you get picked up on my mic.
00:03:14The Basketball Jones have some questions about your Facemask.
00:03:17Is that an aesthetic Facemask?
00:03:18It's partially aesthetic, partially functional.
00:03:21Is it custom?
00:03:22It helps against elbows from the DHM.
00:03:24Now, have you broke your nose or an orbital bone?
00:03:27I broke an orbital bone back in, I think, 07 and I liked the look so I stuck with it.
00:03:32Uh, how's the sweat factor under there?
00:03:35The sweat factor is, it's not bad.
00:03:37You get used to it over time.
00:03:38Okay.
00:03:39Is it like a Rip Hamilton thing where you'll never play a game without a Facemask?
00:03:42It's become that at this point, yeah.
00:03:44I find it so fucking annoying.
00:03:47No offense.
00:03:48You're a nice guy off the court, on the court.
00:03:50There's nothing more annoying than playing a dude with a Facemask.
00:03:53Let's go, guys.
00:03:54Yeah, how about that?
00:03:55Yeah.
00:03:56That's two times the foreskins have burned me thus far tonight.
00:04:00And the headband.
00:04:02I noticed, you have it on here, you have it on in the game here.
00:04:04You can't wear one without the other.
00:04:06Okay, alright.
00:04:07Now I'm a little concerned, I think, what was your name, Harry there, of the foreskins?
00:04:11I'm sorry.
00:04:12Yeah, yeah.
00:04:13Or no, the gentleman beside you.
00:04:15Michael, I feel like...
00:04:16Nice three there.
00:04:17I feel like you gave it away that you guys lost when you said, we gave it all that we
00:04:21could give.
00:04:22I'm a little worried.
00:04:23Come on, no spoilers, no spoilers, Mellis.
00:04:26Okay.
00:04:27Uh, it looks like I think, like I said, it's a nice jumper there.
00:04:31Uh, elementary school gym here, not a lot of room to operate, Chris.
00:04:34No.
00:04:35Especially with five on five.
00:04:36As you guys can also see, we only brought our team, as we pan down, they brought like
00:04:4030 fans.
00:04:41Do you see that?
00:04:42We're only chanting USA for ourselves.
00:04:45All the chants for the foreskins were legitimately inspired by people we don't say.
00:04:49Wow, Chris, you're very vocal I can hear on the court.
00:04:52What I lack in skill, I make up for motivating yelling.
00:04:55There's a lot of pull up threes in this.
00:04:56Yeah.
00:04:57Yeah.
00:04:58It's like watching the Warriors game.
00:04:59Oh, here comes the face mask.
00:05:00Oh, that was...
00:05:02Good foul.
00:05:03No easy layups.
00:05:04When you want it, we have our first phone call on the line.
00:05:06Yeah, let's go to it right now.
00:05:08Let's bring them in.
00:05:09Okay, Joey in Manhattan, you are on the phone.
00:05:11Welcome to the show.
00:05:12Chris, it's great to talk to you.
00:05:14I have a question for the Human Fish.
00:05:16Okay, question for the Human Fish.
00:05:18Joey, what is it?
00:05:19My question is Barack Obama or Barry White?
00:05:24Barack Obama versus Barry White.
00:05:26Human Fish, who wins?
00:05:28Barry White.
00:05:29Barry White.
00:05:30Wow, beats Barack Obama, the President of the United States.
00:05:34Well, Joey, thank you.
00:05:35Anything else?
00:05:36Did you want to talk about this game at all, or are you just completely uninterested in
00:05:39that?
00:05:40I can see President Obama's motorcade on my car memorial.
00:05:45Okay.
00:05:48Okay, well, thank you for the call, Joey, in Manhattan.
00:05:50It's tough to hear him over that USA champ there.
00:05:53An amazing amount of noise in the studio tonight.
00:05:57Now, did he mean Barack Obama versus Barry White one-on-one?
00:06:00Like basketball?
00:06:01I'm going to assume any one-on-one matchup is in terms of a best-to-seven basketball game
00:06:06winner takes.
00:06:07Because Obama's pretty good at basketball.
00:06:08Apparently Barry White.
00:06:09And Barry White.
00:06:10Even better.
00:06:11Barry White's huge, though.
00:06:12He's a Charles Barkley sort of character.
00:06:14Yeah.
00:06:15He just runs over.
00:06:16Depends if it's winners out.
00:06:17Fucking face mask.
00:06:19Face mask?
00:06:20Looks to be the MVP of this game so far.
00:06:22It's early.
00:06:23You know, if you're going to play basketball in a face mask, you have to be decent.
00:06:25Right.
00:06:26You can't show up as a guy with a face mask who sucks.
00:06:28Well, I hope the guy in the green shoes is good at basketball then, too, because that's pretty cocky.
00:06:33Nice defense!
00:06:34Great health defense there.
00:06:35That was all you, bro.
00:06:36That was all you guys.
00:06:37Terry's good at laughing at everything, though.
00:06:41What's up?
00:06:42Four minutes in.
00:06:43First sub of the game.
00:06:44Four minutes in and that guy is already sweated through his entire shirt.
00:06:47Look at that.
00:06:48That's drenched.
00:06:49Everybody else is good?
00:06:50Maybe hot in there.
00:06:51We don't know.
00:06:52We have another call on the line when you guys want it.
00:06:53Oh, yeah.
00:06:54Let's go to it.
00:06:55You're from Chicago.
00:06:56Welcome to the show.
00:06:57How's it going?
00:06:58Pretty good.
00:06:59How are you feeling about this game so far?
00:07:00It's all tied up.
00:07:01It's going good.
00:07:02I had a question for the human fish.
00:07:05A question for the human fish.
00:07:07What do you want to know?
00:07:08I'm from Chicago Big Michael Jordan fan, so the Monstars versus the Toon Squad.
00:07:14The Monstars versus the Toon Squad?
00:07:17Yeah.
00:07:18Toon Squad.
00:07:19Okay.
00:07:20So it's a space jam thing.
00:07:22Toon Squad.
00:07:23The human fish says Toon Squad.
00:07:24I thought he'd say that.
00:07:25Yeah.
00:07:26I thought he'd say that too.
00:07:27If everyone knew he was going to say that, you wasted a question.
00:07:30Keith, anything else you want to talk about?
00:07:33Not really.
00:07:34Okay.
00:07:35Well, thanks a lot, man.
00:07:36Have a great night.
00:07:37You too.
00:07:38Also, fuck the fucking bulls.
00:07:40Chris, I can't ask the human fish this directly, but why didn't the human fish play
00:07:45in the game?
00:07:46Wow.
00:07:47Yeah.
00:07:48As far as we know, they don't have basketball under the sea.
00:07:50Oh.
00:07:51He recently came out from under the sea.
00:07:52Oh, okay.
00:07:53This could be the first time he's ever seen basketball.
00:07:55Get back.
00:07:56Get back.
00:07:57Get back.
00:07:58Get back.
00:07:59Yes versus no.
00:08:00First time he's seen that.
00:08:01Oh.
00:08:02Not that face mask.
00:08:03Nice little.
00:08:04No.
00:08:05Face mask.
00:08:06If you were guessing, coming into this game, how many points did you think you were
00:08:08going to score?
00:08:09It depends who was guarding me.
00:08:10If Chris was guarding me, I was just going to have my weapon in 50, 100.
00:08:16Wow.
00:08:17So he's not even in it.
00:08:18You're already probably eight to ten points right now.
00:08:21So we're expecting a big night.
00:08:22I've been distracted with the human fish and the calls, but Chris, have you done anything
00:08:26in this game yet?
00:08:27I have not entered the game yet.
00:08:28You're not even in it?
00:08:29Oh, okay.
00:08:30I think chatter, though, I think is a skill.
00:08:32That's helping.
00:08:33It's a part of my skill set.
00:08:34Now, is that just because you're unselfish?
00:08:36You wanted to get your team, you know, coming off the bench as a spark plug?
00:08:39I heard Chris asking for a sub.
00:08:41I look at myself as sort of, you know, I am to my team what John Starks was for the
00:08:45early 90s mix.
00:08:46Right.
00:08:47So you're going to dunk on someone later in this game.
00:08:49Yes.
00:08:50Not always a starter, but definitely a spark plug, and I often miss seven threes a game.
00:08:54Nice shot, Kane.
00:08:55Speaking of threes, whoa, very nice shot.
00:08:57That's that guy right there, Michael Kane.
00:08:59You need to respect him, face mask.
00:09:01You need to respect him, face mask.
00:09:03You need to respect him, face mask.
00:09:06Chris, have you ever bothered to learn face mask's name, or is it...
00:09:10I believe it's Neil.
00:09:12At this point, I believe I have learned his name as Neil, although I will say I'm mad that
00:09:15I know that.
00:09:16Face mask behind you, Kane.
00:09:17Face mask behind you.
00:09:18Watch walk in the middle.
00:09:21Big board, George.
00:09:23Big board.
00:09:25Big air ball board there.
00:09:27Uh, for you, is this the first time you've ever watched yourself play basketball?
00:09:31This is sort of a question for a lot of you guys watching that we're in the game.
00:09:34For me it is.
00:09:35Are you surprised how shitty it looks?
00:09:36I watch my high school games all the time.
00:09:38Oh yeah?
00:09:39But I haven't seen myself play basketball.
00:09:40Like this will be like the first time, like, I'm not going to say how old I am in a while.
00:09:44Since high school.
00:09:45You played in high school.
00:09:46So how many of the Forskins played in high school?
00:09:48Nice shot.
00:09:49You guys!
00:09:50That's a ringer!
00:09:51He too!
00:09:52That's a ringer!
00:09:53He too!
00:09:54That's a ringer!
00:09:55And we played against our team.
00:09:56Wow.
00:09:57Are you surprised, like...
00:09:58Hold on.
00:09:59I mean, we play...
00:10:00That's a sounding shot though.
00:10:01We play basketball and like, yeah, you guys are watching this.
00:10:03Everyone seems pretty good.
00:10:04Like, nice basket right there.
00:10:05Nice runner, my face mask.
00:10:06Uh, but when you watch it, does it surprise you how shitty you sort of look?
00:10:11I don't know.
00:10:12No.
00:10:13Like how slow everything is, you know what I mean?
00:10:15I'm very impressed right now.
00:10:16Right.
00:10:17I think these guys look spectacular.
00:10:20Oh, great D!
00:10:22It seems to me the Del Harris Marathon offensive strategy has passed the game.
00:10:26Clean steals that went your way because you were the only girl.
00:10:30Clothesline him right now, Shannon.
00:10:31Wow.
00:10:32I want to fucking rip your dick off.
00:10:34Give me a banana man.
00:10:37Wow.
00:10:38Alright.
00:10:39Uh, I have a question for the human fish.
00:10:41Okay.
00:10:42Uh, bananas or dicks?
00:10:44Bananas versus dicks.
00:10:46Dicks.
00:10:47Yeah!
00:10:48Yeah!
00:10:49Yeah, that's right!
00:10:50Human fish loves cop?
00:10:51Human fish does.
00:10:52Just so you guys know, in case you haven't watched the show, we recently discovered human
00:10:56fish loves cop.
00:10:57Loves it.
00:10:58Human fish, I'm also being told you gotta project, man.
00:11:00Just so you know, human fish.
00:11:01Dicks!
00:11:02Dicks!
00:11:03Dicks!
00:11:04Much better.
00:11:05Oh, that's right.
00:11:06I think I saw a clip, Chris, where the human fish had a giant dong that he was flinging
00:11:09around, yeah.
00:11:10We had a show that ended a few weeks ago, a few minutes early, and the human fish produced
00:11:13a dildo and started singing and dancing with it as our whole crowd chanted the words,
00:11:17the human fish loves cop.
00:11:18I thought we had a weird podcast, but this is a whole other level.
00:11:23Our podcast is very strange.
00:11:25It's amazing, it's amazing.
00:11:26Let me ask you guys this, what would you say are the, uh, the, how would you say our
00:11:30rivalries, our rivalries compared to some of the rivalries in pro basketball?
00:11:33Like Lakers, Celtics, that's a big one, right?
00:11:35You got early 90s Knicks versus Pacers.
00:11:38Yeah, this, it's right up there.
00:11:40Yeah.
00:11:41I mean, we've got the green of the Celtics.
00:11:42I was actually curious about the colors.
00:11:44Were you just given these by Zog, or did you pick these yourself?
00:11:47We did not choose turquoise in that year.
00:11:49Yeah.
00:11:50We did choose Kelly Green.
00:11:51We've been Kelly Green since game one.
00:11:53So you're Celtics fans?
00:11:54No.
00:11:55No.
00:11:56It just, it spoke to us.
00:11:57Oh, okay.
00:11:58Absolutely.
00:11:59Sometimes go to an Irish bar after the games.
00:12:01Is there any camaraderie after the games between the two teams, or do you, like, do you hang
00:12:05out, go for a beer, have some wings?
00:12:07No.
00:12:08We give you free tickets to our comedy show.
00:12:09Oh, yeah.
00:12:10Usually they come to the UCB theater sometimes.
00:12:12They have to make fun of us when we come.
00:12:14Yeah.
00:12:15Just material, really.
00:12:16But very little.
00:12:17I think our opinion is that we would like it if they beat the other teams, but otherwise
00:12:21we don't root for them on any level.
00:12:23Right.
00:12:24You actively boo us as an MVP.
00:12:26We did.
00:12:27We did once show up to a Foreskins game that we were not a part of, and bring a Vuvuzela
00:12:31and taunt them.
00:12:32Which is a classless move that I'm the first to admit.
00:12:35We have some halftime footage if you guys do want to see what was going on on the break.
00:12:38Absolutely.
00:12:39Absolutely.
00:12:40All right, so let's go ahead and we'll see what was going on during the halftime break
00:12:44out on the court.
00:12:46All right, you don't want to shoot from outside.
00:12:49Yeah.
00:12:50So don't blow by them.
00:12:51If you're going to challenge them, don't run by because they will not shoot over you.
00:12:55Don't go home.
00:12:56And if we want to come back, we've got to get mean on defense.
00:12:59I know these guys are our friends off the court, but we've got to get moved.
00:13:02We've got to get moved.
00:13:04We've got to play ugly.
00:13:06Just tell me where to be, man.
00:13:09Yeah, you're good.
00:13:10The one thing I would say is when you set that screen up top, which is good, then get
00:13:14out of there where you're going.
00:13:15You know what I mean?
00:13:16Just so you know, one thing I like to do, like I'll get down fast.
00:13:19Yeah.
00:13:20Set up around there.
00:13:21Oh no.
00:13:22Cut across.
00:13:23I'll hit a screen for you.
00:13:24You'll wind up open on that three line.
00:13:25I'll wind up open up on that elbow.
00:13:26Shannon and I do it all the time.
00:13:27Set up right down there, but use the screen.
00:13:29Yeah.
00:13:30Run right off my shoulder.
00:13:31Run them right there.
00:13:32You know what I mean?
00:13:33Then they'll either follow you or they'll follow me.
00:13:35We're better emotional players than our skill players.
00:13:37So fucking get in there.
00:13:38Yeah.
00:13:39Bro, we fucking organized one fucking game.
00:13:41They beat us.
00:13:42We beat us.
00:13:43They beat us.
00:13:44That's embarrassing.
00:13:45Yeah, yeah.
00:13:46Very good.
00:13:47But I don't think you've talked yet about, I would compare your game to that of Vernon
00:13:54Maxwell.
00:13:55In that, not that you are particularly any good, but you fly off the hinge at the worst possible
00:14:05moment.
00:14:06You fly off the hinge and will start fights on the court with anyone.
00:14:09It's true.
00:14:10This is a charity league.
00:14:11I've been in three fist fights.
00:14:13Wow.
00:14:14And I was just wondering if you could tell the Basketball Jones crew and everyone some
00:14:19of your great, some of your better on-court fist fights.
00:14:23I fought, there's a guy, there's a sax team that put me up sometimes.
00:14:28And there's this six foot six dude who the first time he saw him was wearing a saved Duke
00:14:32lacrosse t-shirt.
00:14:33Which if you remember why they needed saving was because they were accused of gang rape.
00:14:36And he was six foot six and he was playing dirty.
00:14:39And I lost my, he elbowed me in the head.
00:14:41You were there, right Shannon?
00:14:42Yeah.
00:14:43At that one, I did legitimately lose it and charge him.
00:14:45So you're saying he deserved it.
00:14:47He did deserve it but I shouldn't be fighting, I shouldn't be getting in the, not even in
00:14:52the face, in like the mid section of a huge man.
00:14:55And you haven't been kicked out of the league?
00:14:57Three fights?
00:14:58Wow.
00:14:59It's come to like us getting separated and a lot of, I mean fist fights in the sense
00:15:04of-
00:15:05It's just like an NBA fight really.
00:15:06No punches actually thrown.
00:15:08Yeah, like people getting in between us while we all point on each other's faces and
00:15:10get our, our male rage out.
00:15:11Yo guys!
00:15:12Keith, Terry, JD!
00:15:14Keith, Terry, JD you guys are big man!
00:15:16You're bigger than them now!
00:15:18You don't let Block get between you and the basket man!
00:15:21Chris, you sound pretty angry right now on the court there.
00:15:24I am, I am.
00:15:25I believe I'm-
00:15:26Whoa, is this our first free throw of the game?
00:15:28Oh, we're already at that point where I got hurt?
00:15:31You got up already.
00:15:32You were in fire.
00:15:33Whoa!
00:15:35Whoa!
00:15:36We started blowing the Vuvuzela every time they took a foul shot.
00:15:39And it worked, you missed, that was a brick.
00:15:41I thought that was a mastodon.
00:15:45Great paint, how do you like that paint shot?
00:15:47That's awesome guys, that's awesome.
00:15:49Horrible free throw, great camera.
00:15:53Where's those feet, where's those bodies?
00:15:56This, this guy with the foul now, uh, he kind of reminds me a little bit of a white Austin guy.
00:16:02Now Greg, I'm gonna-
00:16:03Greg, I'm gonna have to cut you off because I'm being told if we listen, this is where I get in a fight with one of my teammates on the side.
00:16:08Yeah, that's four guys go, why are you mad at me in every game now?
00:16:11What are you mad at me?
00:16:12What are you mad at me?
00:16:13What are you mad at me?
00:16:14Why are you mad at me?
00:16:15Because there's four people blocking you.
00:16:16It wasn't wide open.
00:16:17Look at you.
00:16:18Are you getting mad at me?
00:16:19Dude, you've been nothing but yelling at me the past two games.
00:16:21I don't get it.
00:16:22That's a problem, dude.
00:16:23Because all you do is yell at me.
00:16:24I'm yelling at you.
00:16:25Dude, you've been scolding me.
00:16:26That's the way.
00:16:27Two straight games.
00:16:28All you've been doing is scolding me for two games.
00:16:30I don't get it.
00:16:31I apologize, I apologize.
00:16:32It feels like you're not even arguing about the game, though.
00:16:43I thought he said, like, you've been like this the last three days, man.
00:16:47Yeah, yeah.
00:16:49We, uh, we're a family, the DHM, and we fight like one sometimes.
00:16:54That was really embarrassing.
00:16:57Great camera work, though.
00:17:01I've been told that Jackie is back on the phone.
00:17:04Listen.
00:17:05DHM, let's go the fuck home.
00:17:08Yeah.
00:17:09Sorry, dude.
00:17:10DHM!
00:17:12Yeah!
00:17:13Okay, okay.
00:17:14We should do one two three, fuck you.
00:17:16Let's do it!
00:17:17DHM, DHM!
00:17:19Del Harris!
00:17:21Del Harris!
00:17:22Come here, fuck the first.
00:17:24Come here.
00:17:25Fuck the four skins after.
00:17:27Fuck the four skins after.
00:17:28Yeah, yeah.
00:17:29Alright, guys.
00:17:30Okay, okay, okay.
00:17:31Come on, thank you guys.
00:17:32Ready?
00:17:33One, two, three.
00:17:34Fuck the four skins!
00:17:35Woo!
00:17:36That's okay.
00:17:37Hot.
00:17:38We were in it the whole time.
00:17:39You're cool?
00:17:40We're good, man.
00:17:41Alright, man.
00:17:42I didn't mean to be, I didn't mean to shield you.
00:17:43I know, I just annoyed the shit out of you.
00:17:44I didn't know I was upsetting you.
00:17:45My bad.
00:17:46That's all good.
00:17:47That's just how I behaved from day one, you know?
00:17:48It's all good.
00:17:49It's all good.
00:17:50We came back.
00:17:51I want to just say, like, what the hell is with the four skins in terms of, like, sportsmanship,
00:18:05and especially, like, the fans.
00:18:06Like, there's some bullshit going on there.
00:18:08I don't know.
00:18:09I just got bad vibes.
00:18:10Like, just the type of stuff they were, like, yelling.
00:18:12Like, I was terrible.
00:18:13I was, yeah, maybe I should.
00:18:14I'm gonna confront the fans.
00:18:15The team was fine.
00:18:16I was supposed to say, like, next time it's gonna be, like, opposing fans or something.
00:18:31Like, there was some serious bullshit.
00:18:33Just, like, just fine.
00:18:35I thought we were both excellent boys, actually, yeah.
00:18:46Yeah.
00:18:47I mean, there were two things that I heard on the sidelines.
00:18:50I mean, I couldn't even understand how.
00:18:53Hebrew, Hebrew, yeah.
00:18:54This was one of the first basketball games I've been to for a year.
00:18:57Really?
00:18:58Yeah.
00:18:59The games changed a lot.
00:19:00Yeah.
00:19:01Wow.
00:19:02I had no idea that there was such a confrontation among the two fans.
00:19:06Rob, thank you for standing up for us.
00:19:08Let's go ahead and get any closing thoughts in, starting with the...
00:19:12I'll be classy now.
00:19:13Even though he said, fuck the Foreskins, thank you guys for playing us.
00:19:16You won a close game.
00:19:18We always love playing you guys.
00:19:19Thank you for being a part of it.
00:19:21If there's any closing pot shots you want to take, Foreskins, your view of us from the floor,
00:19:25I think you've earned the right to talk that shit, so please feel free.
00:19:29We gained a lot of intelligence.
00:19:31We now know all your plays.
00:19:32Just throw up a three whenever you're open, and I think we're ready for next season.
00:19:36That is true.
00:19:37We did just give you a view of a game where we wore mics that allowed you to hear everything
00:19:42we said.
00:19:43Not a good strategy for our future endeavors against you.
00:19:47Anyone else?
00:19:48Shannon, anything you want to say to the Foreskins in closing?
00:19:50Well, I was injured in that game, so I look forward to destroying you when I am all healed
00:19:55up.
00:19:56Wow.
00:19:57I got like some 10 nights in my knees, so I couldn't really take a shot because I
00:20:02couldn't put pressure on my shooting leg.
00:20:04And next season we got our new point guard playing with us.
00:20:07Oh.
00:20:08His name is straight up?
00:20:09Stefan Marbury.
00:20:10His name is Phil Jackson.
00:20:13His real name is Phil Jackson.
00:20:15But he does not walk like Phil Jackson.
00:20:17No.
00:20:18He's for real, man.
00:20:19He's great.
00:20:20So, Basketball Jones, what are the next stops on your tour?
00:20:23How's that been going?
00:20:24I hope that this was a worthy stop on your tour.
00:20:26I know you guys are busy men and you consume a lot of basketball.
00:20:28I hope this wasn't too much of a waste of your time.
00:20:30I assume that it was.
00:20:31This is the first game we've watched in six months.
00:20:33Really?
00:20:34Yeah.
00:20:35Wow.
00:20:36Do you guys fuck with college ball at all?
00:20:37Not much.
00:20:38It's worse than this.
00:20:39I would say this is more entertaining than watching college basketball.
00:20:43Absolutely.
00:20:44I would say.
00:20:45There's less threes even in this game than there is in college ball.
00:20:48Yeah, we have one more stop.
00:20:49I guess two more shows left for our tour.
00:20:51We're going to Boston tomorrow.
00:20:53We'll be doing a show there Friday night.
00:20:54And then we have a show in Toronto a week from Friday night.
00:20:57So, December 9th.
00:20:58And then we're done.
00:20:59We've been on the road for about 30 days now.
00:21:01So, we're ready to go home.
00:21:02Wow.
00:21:03Well, thank you guys for making us a stop.
00:21:05It really means a lot.
00:21:06Thanks for having us.
00:21:07We have you guys here.
00:21:08I think we've got another call on the line.
00:21:10Andre or Andref from Boston?
00:21:12Andref?
00:21:13Explain that.
00:21:14Are you on the line, Andref?
00:21:16Oh, you mispronounced my name.
00:21:19Look at that, man.
00:21:21Well, I thought that call was going to get us about a minute.
00:21:28I think that was Jackie.
00:21:30Yeah, Jackie, if you're watching, call in one more time.
00:21:33And as soon as Jackie calls, just patch her through.
00:21:35Don't even tell us.
00:21:36Just tell her, start talking and let her go.
00:21:39I actually have a question for you guys.
00:21:40Sure.
00:21:41If I remember correctly, I think that the first time we played you guys, there was Jason Sudeikis
00:21:46siding on the court.
00:21:47Yeah.
00:21:48I was wondering if he was going to make a return to the DHM.
00:21:51SNL's Jason Sudeikis, original member of the DHM.
00:21:53Unfortunately, now he's busy being a movie star.
00:21:56So he doesn't have the time.
00:21:58All of us are comedians, but you'll notice that all of us are comedians of a certain level of success.
00:22:02The level of success where you don't yet live in Los Angeles and are free enough time to do bullshit like this.
00:22:09So that was a pretty depressing question.
00:22:16More depressing answer.
00:22:18Of course, I don't want to bring it up, but you threw this whole thing.
00:22:22You hired...
00:22:23Is this Jackie?
00:22:25Yes.
00:22:26Yeah!
00:22:27Jackie, real quick, closing words.
00:22:29I love you guys so much.
00:22:31You bring so much happiness to my heart and vagina.
00:22:35I'm just like, oh.
00:22:37Your heart.
00:22:38Trey, what was your question?
00:22:40Oh, I don't have one.
00:22:41I'm just happy in the vagina.
00:22:43I'm glad you brought happiness to your vagina.
00:22:46Thank you, guys.
00:22:47MNN, have a great night.
00:22:50We are The Chris Gethard Show.
00:22:51Woo!
00:22:52Thank you so much.
00:22:53Happiness to the vagina.
00:23:05Still online live on the internet.
00:23:08Just so everyone knows.
00:23:09Oh, yeah.
00:23:10Yeah.
00:23:11Not too crazy.
00:23:12Not too crazy.
00:23:13You're always on the internet.
00:23:21We're still on, right?
00:23:23Five minutes left.
00:23:24Five minutes left on line?
00:23:25All right.
00:23:26All right.
00:23:31The show's not...
00:23:32We're still on MNN?
00:23:34Tell me, are we on MNN or just on the internet?
00:23:38Five minutes of clapping.
00:23:40Don't just rewind the clock.
00:23:45We should have started the clap slower and then built to it.
00:23:49Just keep it going forever.
00:23:50We have five more minutes to our live stream.
00:23:53We want to say goodbye to our live stream.
00:23:55We want to say thanks to everybody who's watching online.
00:23:57We want to thank the Basketball Jones so much for being here.
00:24:00We want to thank the Forest Kids for coming out.
00:24:02We want to thank everybody who called.
00:24:03Spread the word about the show.
00:24:05You can subscribe to our podcast.
00:24:06All that good shit.
00:24:07Thanks to everybody who's been helping out.
00:24:09Next week, we haven't even told him this.
00:24:12We're doing a dating and love and sex episode.
00:24:16We're going to try to find the human fish.
00:24:18A human lady.
00:24:19How's that sound, fish?
00:24:20Good versus bad?
00:24:22Good.
00:24:23Good.
00:24:24Tune in next week.
00:24:25If you are a lady and you would like to sleep straight up.
00:24:28Sleep with the human fish.
00:24:30Email.
00:24:31Z-E-R-O laughs at gmail.com.
00:24:34If you want to give up that ass to the human fish.
00:24:37Zero laughs at gmail.com.
00:24:39How's that sound, fish?
00:24:41Danks.
00:24:42Danks.
00:24:43Human fish makes you what?
00:24:44Who do you want to go on dates with?
00:24:48Boys versus girls.
00:24:49Next week?
00:24:50Girls.
00:24:51Girls.
00:24:52Human fish.
00:24:53Ladies.
00:24:54Girls with dicks.
00:24:55Ladies.
00:24:56If you are out there and you want to fuck the human fish.
00:24:57Zero laughs at gmail.com.
00:24:59It's going to happen next week.
00:25:01Thank you live stream.
00:25:02Have a great night.
00:25:03Thanks again CBJ for being here.
00:25:05Good night everybody.
00:25:06Good night, everybody.