My Daughter Knows My Birthday But She Doesn't Know My Financial Plan | DISC 6: Vitality | 411 PODCAST (Episode 55) - video Dailymotion

Lerin Gaines

My Daughter Knows My Birthday But She Doesn't Know My Financial Plan | DISC 6: Vitality | 411 PODCAST (Episode 55)   "Where Everyday Conversations Lead to Financial Awareness"   Featuring: Wisdom Wednesday, Mentorship Series   Wednesday | September 23rd, 2026   Broadcasting on all social media platforms @LERINGAINES   https://leringaines.com  https://linktr.ee/leringaines  https://www.facebook.com/leringaines  http://instagram.com/leringaines  https://www.tiktok.com/@leringaines  http://twitter.com/leringaines  https://www.youtube.com/@leringaines  https://www.twitch.tv/leringaines  https://kick.com/leringaines  https://dailymotion.com/LerinGaines   Song of The Day: "Return of The Mack" by Mark Morrison  Released 1996 | Return of The Mack Album   Burning Questions for Reflections!  When does financial privacy become financial responsibility, and how much should the people you love actually know?   Share your response to tonight's Burning Questions...  Text: (609) 200-1098 | Email: Info@LerinGaines.com   DM on any social media platform @LERINGAINES (Facebook, Instagram, X, TikTok, YouTube, KICK, Twitch, DailyMotion)   Check out my FREE Monthly digital Newsletter 'Whispers of Wisdom' for updates, exclusives, and inspiration!   #LerinGaines #FinancialCoach #BlackDiamondConsultations #DebtFreeLiving #WhispersofWisdom #VacationWithMe #BurningQuestions #Facebook #Instagram #TikTok #X #YouTube #KICK #Twitch #DailyMotion #BlackDiamondConsultationsNetwork #411PODCAST #DISC6 #Vitality   DISCLAIMER: The content and information provided by Black Diamond Consultations are intended solely for educational and entertainment purposes. We do not guarantee the accuracy or completeness of the materials, and any reliance you place on them is strictly at your own risk. Our content is not intended to be a substitute for professional advice or judgment. Black Diamond Consultations shall not be liable for any errors or omissions in the educational and entertainment content or for any actions taken based on the information provided.   411 PODCAST  DISC 6: Vitality  Track 55: My Daughter Knows My Birthday But She Doesn't Know My Financial Plan  ©️ 2026 Black Diamond Consultations Network  LerinGaines.com

Transcript

00:00So

03:31Every episode is part of a journey across our weekly mentorship series, Spiritual Sundays, Mental Mondays, Transformational Tuesdays, Wisdom Wednesdays,

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04:14So grab your journal, open your mind, and prepare to go beyond the surface.

04:19Here, we don't just talk, we transform lives.

04:22And now, here's your guide through it all, entrepreneur, mentor, and financial coach, Laryn Gaines.

04:41What's going on, what's going on, what's going on, welcome, welcome, welcome, welcome on, and welcome to the 4-in

04:49-1 podcast, where everyday conversations lead to financial awareness.

04:54We are here, episode 55, my daughter knows my birthday, but she doesn't know my financial plan.

05:05That's interesting.

05:07When someone knows your birthday, but they really don't know your financial plan.

05:13Episode 55, let's get it.

05:18I want to say thank you all so much for joining in.

05:22I definitely do appreciate you.

05:24Please go ahead and hit that like button.

05:27Please comment, share, subscribe, tag a friend, text a friend.

05:33Let people know what you know about the 4-in-1 podcast.

05:38I definitely do appreciate you because without each and every one of you out there supporting, liking, sharing, commenting, texting,

05:46DMing me, this thing cannot go around.

05:49And I most certainly cannot do this without my executive producer.

05:52I want to thank God for giving me the strength, the courage, the wisdom, the understanding to continue to keep

05:59pressing forward.

06:00This is amazing.

06:02This is a just full circle movement.

06:07I actually sit back now and I can listen to one of the replays of one of the episodes.

06:17And I'm like, wow, this definitely, it feels, it just feels different listening to it, watching it here today versus

06:30when I first started.

06:32So, again, I'm proud of each and every one of you for making and calling this place home.

06:41So, thank you all so much.

06:43I appreciate you.

06:53Got a lot to unpack here today.

06:56And I'm going to just keep it real.

06:58It's going to be one of these shows tonight.

06:59I have no idea which direction it's going to go in, but it's going to go in one direction.

07:04It's either going to work or it's not going to work.

07:06And I think now I'm cool with this because, you know, it is what it is.

07:12I'm not here to try to impress or do anything.

07:15It's just one of those days.

07:16I'm going to just be completely 100% honest with y'all.

07:21I am super tired.

07:24Zero sleep last night, just keeping it real.

07:26And this is what happens when you decide to, you know, go out during a weekday, during a workday, when

07:34you know full well you have stuff to do.

07:36So, I have responsibility.

07:38So, I'm right here in front of this mic, just making it do what it do.

07:42And we're going to go in.

07:46So, I was thinking about this next segment, which is my favorite segment, Song of the Day.

07:56And this is actually not one of my favorite songs.

07:59I remember being a teenager, maybe 16, 17 years old, when this song was out.

08:10And I couldn't stand it.

08:11I absolutely could not stand it.

08:13And every time the video came on, it really just got on my nerves.

08:17So, this is going to be an interesting song of the day.

08:29Return of the Mac by Mark Morrison off of his album, Return of the Mac, in 1996.

08:39I don't know what it was about this song, but I couldn't stand it.

08:44I didn't like the video.

08:46Nothing against Mark, but I just didn't like this song.

08:50And I remember my aunt, when I was younger, she said, and again, this is not me.

08:58I'm just, this is my aunt.

09:02You know who you are if you're listening.

09:04But she said, well, hell, if I look like that too, I guess somebody would lie to me too.

09:13Now, I don't know where that came from.

09:23I don't know if y'all know the song, but what got on my nerves about it was that he

09:30continuously kept saying, you lied to me over and over and over again.

09:35And at a young age, I was like, well, what are you doing, hanging around somebody, being around somebody who's

09:43constantly lying to you?

09:45Just do something about it.

09:46Like, are you going to get up and do something about it?

09:48That's what really got on my nerves about the song.

09:52I just didn't like it.

09:54And it reminded me of another song because they sampled the beat and the song that I did like, they

10:01sampled the beat.

10:02And I just, I just, for some reason, I just couldn't with the song.

10:07So now, Return of the Mac, You Lied to Me.

10:12And so many people loved it too.

10:14Oh, every time it came on, every single time this song came on, people said that that was their jam.

10:21That was it.

10:21But you lied to me over and over and over again.

10:25I just couldn't do it.

10:28But now you know how we remix it.

10:30So I'm thinking, you lied to me.

10:34But in reality, nobody can lie to you unless you allow them.

10:40And instead of too busy focusing on somebody lying to you, the rhetorical question that I have to ask is,

10:49how many times did you lie to yourself?

10:51When you stayed in that relationship, when you stayed in that friendship, when you went places that you probably shouldn't

10:58have went,

10:59when you spent what you probably shouldn't have spent, instead of you worrying about somebody lying to you,

11:06how many times did you lie to yourself?

11:08Real simple.

11:12Return of the Mac.

11:151996.

11:16Off of his debut album, Return of the Mac.

11:22And apparently he's had a lot of financial, not financial, but he's had a lot of legal issues, Mr. Mark

11:31Morrison.

11:31But I'm not here to turn that into this.

11:33But yeah, I told you it was going to be an interesting song of the day.

11:38But before you decide to say that somebody lied to you, ask yourself, should you have been in this situation

11:44in the first place?

11:45And how easy or how easy would it be for you to get out of it if you didn't sit

11:52there and lie to yourself?

11:54Song of the day.

12:00Song of the day.

12:25Song of the Mac by Mark Morrison.

12:28Now on that note, let's go ahead and bring in my friend, author, poet, Birdman313.

12:39Let's see what he thinks about Return of the Mac.

12:56What's going on?

12:57What's going on?

12:58Hey, how's it going?

13:00It's going.

13:01It's going.

13:02Yeah.

13:03How are you?

13:05I'm doing good.

13:06I'm doing good, man.

13:07I'm feeling a whole lot better now because I finally figured out what was wrong with my video program.

13:14So, hey, I'm doing I'm feeling good.

13:17That's good.

13:17What was wrong with it?

13:19I had to go into the part where you video at and just change a button to default sound.

13:34And that's all it was, man.

13:36That it was like a one second thing I did.

13:40And, man, I oh, man, I spent three hours trying to figure that out.

13:46Well, I'm glad you figured it out.

13:48I think as I'm more mature these days, I have broken a lot of things.

13:55I have cussed a lot of people out.

13:58I have shut some things down and cut myself short over something simple like that.

14:05Yeah.

14:06And, you know, because I do have a little technology, you know, in my background.

14:12Well, all I did was just I just finally went in and started reading a whole bunch of stuff.

14:17And I mean, they had gotten back with me and I sent them messages and I was getting ready to

14:24ask for my refund.

14:26Then I went in and I looked at something.

14:28I'm like, wow, man, that's what it's supposed to be.

14:31So I clicked on this button and when it dropped down, I'm like, oh, man, that's all it was.

14:37Oh, and there it was.

14:38Oh, that's good.

14:40Yeah.

14:40That's good.

14:43Now, I mentioned the song of the day, Return of the Mack.

14:48What do you know about that song?

14:50I'll be respectful on that end.

14:52But yes, man, that was a jam.

14:58You see, I knew that you were going to like it.

15:02I knew.

15:04It was some friends of mine because I was back in Michigan.

15:08And I would always bust that out.

15:11And the dude looked at me.

15:12He said, man, why you play this all the time?

15:15I said, because you remind me of trying to be a Mack.

15:19I'm just like, I used to get so mad you lied to me over and over again.

15:24Yeah, and it was this club.

15:27And sometimes they let me just come up there and say, pick out some songs to play.

15:34I said, man, when I played that song, they would say, man, you picked the right song because everybody getting

15:41up.

15:41They ain't sitting around just drinking.

15:44Yeah.

15:44I said, yeah, man.

15:45I said, you ought to give me a job being a full-time DJ.

15:48And he said, man, I already have one.

15:50I said, well, you can fire him.

15:51I'll take his place.

15:56Yeah, you know what I mean?

15:58Because he said he did like the songs that I chose.

16:03And then, you know, it was like, well, do you have DJ equipment?

16:07Well, I said, OK, you better keep the one you got there because I know I don't have it.

16:12And, you know, DJ equipment is expensive.

16:16Yeah.

16:17You know, so.

16:18I never wanted to be a DJ.

16:20My cousin is a DJ.

16:22And, yeah, you're right.

16:24It's expensive.

16:25And it was interesting to see him grow his business because, you know, you got to buy record by record

16:34by record and all of that stuff and the turntables and all that.

16:37It was interesting to see that.

16:39Yeah, but if you know the right people, you get a discount.

16:44You just call a DJ discount for the records that you buy.

16:49At least they did have one.

16:52I know when I was coming through, that's what it was.

16:56And it was I was doing it.

16:58And one person said, hey, man, you have an account?

17:00I said, account.

17:01They said, yeah, you know, you can get a discount on the music.

17:04You don't have to pay like what we pay.

17:06They'll give you a discount on.

17:07And I said, no, I didn't know that.

17:10And, you know, but like I said, the pay was it was like, you know, man, it was like it

17:18just I don't know.

17:21And the equipment was was, you know, like I said, equipment is expensive because you got to have turntable.

17:26You got to have the needles, you know, and back then because, you know, you had turntable with the records

17:31and you was constantly buying needles and needles, you know, wasn't cheap.

17:38And yeah, I remember that song that used to say, put the needle on the record.

17:44Yeah.

17:45And then you would you would have, you know, then you had I mean, you had to have transportation because

17:50you had to bring your own speakers.

17:53I mean, it was just everything, you know, and it I was like, OK, man, it costs too much to

17:59get started up.

18:00But then he he enjoyed it whenever I when I walked in the club, he would just say, OK, he

18:06said he said, oh, I see a good friend to come in.

18:10And, you know, he said, hey, man, you need to come up here for a minute and throw something on

18:15right quick.

18:16And I did, man.

18:18Return of the Mac was like I said, man, I got everybody up and jumping.

18:23I don't know why, but I know what you mean.

18:26I know exactly what you mean.

18:30You really want to know why?

18:33Because most men always thought they was they was Mac.

18:38And that's what the thing.

18:39Well, it was just the title of the song, you know, people or it was some females that thought they

18:45could Mac.

18:47I just I just I couldn't with that song.

18:51Couldn't.

18:51Yeah.

18:53Nope.

18:54But when my aunt said that, she said, well, I can see why she lied to you.

18:59The way you look, I was like, what?

19:01I don't understand.

19:03Yeah.

19:05All right.

19:06We're going to get off of Mark Morrison.

19:08Yeah.

19:09Because we done did it.

19:10We did enough.

19:11This is the first time that we actually had a song on here that was not one of my favorites.

19:16So anyway, so weather good.

19:22Were you at 99?

19:25Well, that's good here.

19:27It's about maybe 55 in the morning.

19:34Oh, yeah.

19:35Okay.

19:35Well, they did.

19:36It's I guess it's supposed to be like the end of October, beginning of September.

19:42Then we'll start seeing weather like that.

19:46Yeah, it was super windy, cold this morning.

19:49I was not feeling that at all.

19:51Definitely not.

19:52Nope.

19:53Yeah.

19:53I can understand.

19:54I can understand.

19:56So.

19:58All right.

19:59So we haven't done money hacks in a minute.

20:04Give me a number.

20:05What number you got here?

20:08Oh, let me see.

20:11Six or 64, 64, 64.

20:15Let's see what we got for 64.

20:18Hmm.

20:20All right.

20:21Here we go again with these housing situations.

20:25All right.

20:26Buy a house if you plan to move within five years.

20:29The cost of paying the agent fees typically is 6%.

20:32So sprucing up your house, settling any transfer taxes with your state or county, and the cost of moving can

20:41easily add up to 10% of your sale price.

20:46That's why I don't recommend buying a home if you intend to live in it for just a few years.

20:52You might need at least 10% appreciation in the home's value just to cover the cost of selling.

20:58While over long stretches home values have kept pace with inflation, we have no guarantee what will ever happen over

21:05short periods.

21:06The last thing you want to do is to be ready to move on with your life and end up

21:10selling at a net loss after factoring in all of the costs.

21:17Well, what do you have to say about that, Birdman?

21:22It sounds all right.

21:24Like I said, I never had intentions on buying a home because I just felt like my life at the

21:34time wasn't prepared for that plus all the things that goes into buying a home.

21:43And I just financially, I wasn't, I wasn't ready and I wasn't going to put myself in that situation just

21:51to please other people.

21:52I know what you mean.

21:54I know exactly what you mean.

21:55It is kind of stressful.

21:57And, uh, I remember years ago when I was, uh, purchasing my first home, the guy, he said, sir, do

22:10you have a heart condition?

22:12And I said, no, he's like, good, because there's news that I'm about to tell you.

22:17And this is, you know, days before you getting ready to move in.

22:20He's like this news that I'm about to tell you.

22:22He said that I probably wouldn't want to tell you if you told me that you had a heart condition.

22:31Yes.

22:33You want to talk about like up to the minute stressed out, not knowing whether you're actually going to get

22:38the house or not.

22:39No.

22:40Yeah.

22:41So, yeah, in any case, um, yeah, we can move on from that.

22:45I'm kind of over speaking about the housing market at this moment.

22:50And I'm sure people who are in it are kind of over it too.

22:54And the state of the world that we're in, it's pretty interesting.

22:59Interesting.

23:00Sorry.

23:00I keep picking that.

23:01I don't know why I keep picking.

23:03Maybe somebody need to know, but maybe somebody need to hear it though.

23:07No, I know what you mean.

23:09Maybe somebody out there that's, that's been contemplating on doing that, but they need to hear all these things.

23:16Now, speaking of the state of the world that we're in, how are the gas prices where you're at?

23:26Uh, 388.

23:31Well, that depends.

23:33Like you use, like I have gas cards.

23:36So if you use, if you use any type of credit card, it's going to be 388.

23:40Um, if you pay cash, it's going to be 378.

23:46Yeah.

23:47Tens.

23:47Well, I know one is one station around here.

23:50They charge 30 cents more just to use your, um, your card.

23:55Oh yeah.

23:56I'll go to that one there.

23:57Yeah.

23:58Yeah.

23:59I don't know when it comes to the prices of gas, even when I did drive back in the day,

24:05I was the type of person that said, Hey, listen, if you need gas, you're going to need gas anyway.

24:09So pull onto the gas station.

24:10And, but I do know some people that will drive all the way cross country just to save a few

24:16cents on gas.

24:17And they don't realize that the money that they saved, they burned it and fuel just to get across country

24:23and to get back.

24:25So I know people like that, but I honestly was never the person that would actually sit there and look

24:32at what was the most reasonable.

24:34But, you know, I know so many people who were, I was never.

24:38Um, well, that's, that's me too.

24:41You know, I mean, it's like, like I tell people, Hey man, I need gas to get around.

24:45That's the only way I'm going to get around.

24:47So, you know, why even worry about the, you know, where you're going to get it at?

24:54Why, why ride across?

24:55And I've heard people say that.

24:57And then when I tell them, you know, they get, they get a kind of upset.

25:01Cause when I say, Hey man, do you realize that, um, three cents or whatever difference is?

25:08You done burnt that up already.

25:10Just getting across town.

25:12Exactly.

25:13Exactly.

25:15And I, uh, have a electric vehicle.

25:18So I pay attention to gas prices.

25:21So I'm just asking you these questions and we'll continue to keep monitoring this just so that we could put

25:26it, put it out there so that every, anybody listening can know.

25:30But you, you asking the wrong one when it comes to me, I can't tell you.

25:34Yeah.

25:36I can't tell you at all, but I, I really, you know what?

25:40I really think they're trying to push everybody to switch over to electric cars though.

25:46I really do.

25:47Let me tell you when it comes to that, because good luck in trying to find a charging station.

25:55How about that?

25:57Yeah.

25:57They want to, they want to push everybody to a good luck and finding a charging station and finding one

26:05that actually will charge it in a, uh, I guess a decent timeframe too.

26:11Cause if you find one, that's good.

26:12Oh, but you're going to be sitting there for a minute.

26:15Oh yeah.

26:15I know.

26:16Yeah.

26:16No, no, no thing.

26:18I mean, I love the electric vehicle, but I do not love the charging process.

26:24Yeah.

26:27All right.

26:28So we are headed to, where are we going tonight?

26:31We are going to Richmond, Virginia.

26:34You've ever been to Virginia before?

26:37No, no, I haven't.

26:39Is that a place that you desire to go to?

26:42No.

26:44Why not?

26:44You say it.

26:46I just, you know, there are some places that I had, I would like to visit and some place I

26:52wouldn't.

26:52And Virginia is one of them.

26:55Okay.

26:56So, um, okay.

26:57I'll put it like this because of the things that I heard about Virginia, you know, that, that kind of

27:04had, because I know, um,

27:07um, me and one of the, um, players, basketball player, we, we was talking about transferring to, um, to West

27:13Virginia.

27:14And then my dad said, well, I guess you won't ever see us coming down there, you know, like that.

27:20And I'm like, oh, okay.

27:22And then I, we got a little information.

27:24I said, okay, that's it.

27:25I don't really want to go, but I know it didn't change a lot, but.

27:30Well, yeah, Virginia is too much.

27:33I mean, I know I'm in the South here in Texas, but it's, oh man, Virginia is more, I don't

27:40know.

27:40It's just, it has that Southern, that Southern feeling more than Texas does.

27:48Okay.

27:48What is another state that you probably are not interested in visiting?

27:53Alabama.

27:55Okay.

27:56Now give me one more.

27:58Mississippi.

28:01Now I knew, I knew that you were going to say that, but I have cousins there.

28:06And I remember years ago, as far as she passed away, my dad's sister, she was like, boy, you really

28:14don't like coming down here, do you?

28:16Cause, uh, we only get a chance to see you once every five years.

28:20I said, you got that right.

28:22And I said, no, and my dad, that's what he said.

28:27He chose Texas with Houston over Mississippi.

28:31Cause he said, I always knew you'll come to Texas.

28:37You won't go to Mississippi.

28:39Not at all.

28:41No.

28:42Yeah.

28:44Interesting.

28:46What?

28:46There's a, one more to give me one more.

28:49One more.

28:50Let's see if you hit this one.

28:53Let me see.

28:54I'm trying to think it's not to, um, Oh, North Carolina.

28:59Really?

29:00You don't like North Carolina?

29:02I'm sorry.

29:02South Carolina, South Carolina.

29:04I like the Carolinas.

29:06You don't like them?

29:07No.

29:09Okay.

29:10We're going to have to do a whole show on state.

29:15Why not?

29:16That's funny, but okay.

29:17All right.

29:18Well, we got to go to, uh, Richmond, Virginia, and we have Miss Denise here.

29:25She's 58 years old and she says, I have always believed that my finances were my business.

29:33I work for my money.

29:34I paid my bills.

29:35I raised my children.

29:36I saved when I could.

29:37I never wanted my kids knowing, excuse me.

29:40I never wanted my kids knowing every detail about what I had in a bank.

29:45To me, privacy meant protection.

29:47But recently my daughter asked me a question I wasn't prepared to answer.

29:51She said, mom, if something happened to you tomorrow, would I know what to do?

29:58I laughed it off.

29:59Then she asked where I kept my life insurance information.

30:03I couldn't tell her.

30:05She asked whether I had a will.

30:07I told her I had been meaning to update it.

30:10She asked whether I had a retirement accounts.

30:13I said yes, but I didn't want to tell her where everything was.

30:17Then she asked something that really bothered me.

30:19Mom, do you have everything written down somewhere?

30:23I didn't.

30:24I have accounts in different places, old paperwork and filing cabinets, passwords saved in different

30:30locations, insurance information mixed in with other documents.

30:34I know where everything is, or at least I think I do.

30:37But my daughter doesn't.

30:39And that's when I realized something.

30:41I had spent years protecting my financial privacy without realizing that I might be creating

30:46financial confusion for the people I love.

30:48I'm not wealthy.

30:49I'm not trying to leave my children a fortune, but I do want them to know what to do if

30:55I'm

30:55hospitalized or unable to communicate or eventually pass away.

30:59The uncomfortable part is that the organization, excuse me, let me back this all the way up.

31:08The uncomfortable part is that organizing everything means facing my own mortality.

31:13It means looking at accounts I haven't reviewed in years.

31:17It means making decisions I've avoided.

31:19It means having conversations about money that my family has never been comfortable having.

31:24And honestly, part of me feels like discussing my finances with my children means giving up

31:29control.

31:30But maybe that's not what it's all about.

31:33My preparation isn't about giving someone control over your money.

31:38Maybe it's about making sure they aren't trying to figure out everything out while you're still

31:44grieving.

31:45So my question is, when does financial privacy become financial responsibility?

31:50And how much should the people you love actually know?

31:55What are your thoughts, Birdman?

32:00I had to think about this because I actually went through something like that when my dad

32:06passed away.

32:08Okay.

32:09See, that's why I'm saying the old country way.

32:11That's how the old country people think.

32:16There's nothing wrong with saying, well, hey, I have a bank account.

32:20If something happens to me, I want you to be able to go in there because if you don't get

32:27what's in my bank account, the state don't get it.

32:31I know that's right.

32:32And a lot of people don't realize that.

32:36And I thought about that and I'm like, wow, you know, because my kids, they know.

32:41I told them, I said, hey, look here.

32:43I said, you see this key right here on my key ring?

32:45They said, yeah, it's okay.

32:47I have a safe and that's where I put, you know, all my insurance, you know, all my passwords

32:52and insurance.

32:53So if something ever happened to me, you can just go in there.

32:58You have a place to go to.

33:01But I understand, too, on the flip side, you don't really want to tell your kids the amount

33:09you have because kids have killed their parents just to get their money.

33:17Oh, like the, uh, yeah.

33:21The, what was that, the mint?

33:22Go ahead.

33:23I don't mean to cut you off.

33:24Go ahead.

33:26But, and that, that, you know, because you never know, one of your child, children may

33:32have a drug problem.

33:33May owe some money because of, of a gambling debt.

33:37But, and if they keep asking you for money, you don't give it to them, then it's best

33:42you start watching out because they might try to have you knocked off, as they say, to

33:50get that money.

33:52So, but my kids, like my kids right now, they don't know what I have in the bank.

33:56They just know I have a bank account.

33:58And I say, hey, man, you know, just go to the bank and get the money out.

34:03It's in, it's, you know, their name is on my account.

34:06At least I have that.

34:09And I mean, is this, like I said, that's, that's the old Southern way.

34:15Was she talking about not letting them, she, she's hiding too much.

34:21And you know what?

34:23She may be hiding stuff that she don't, she don't even have.

34:26And she don't want her kids to know.

34:29And, you know, they say hiding stuff.

34:32Um, you hide stuff so much that you hide it from yourself.

34:36Yes.

34:37That's craziness.

34:38And you say the old Southern way, what is that supposed to mean?

34:42Like, so I guess down South when, when things go wrong, I guess they really go wrong.

34:47Yeah.

34:48And when I say old Southern way, Ooh, we, yeah.

34:51They really go wrong because you done hit it so much and you didn't tell anybody.

34:54So what?

34:55So when something happens, all hell breaks loose and nobody knows what's going on.

34:59Um, I'm a reason why I said that because a situation that happened right in our family,

35:05whereas my dad had a house here, him and my mom.

35:10Okay.

35:11And what happened was he went and got a loan.

35:17And then his sister was sending him money.

35:20He was putting in the bank.

35:22My mother was not aware of any of this, any of it.

35:28So when he passed away, uh, his good friend across the street said, well, this is the only

35:35bank I ever known, known your dad to go to.

35:38I mean, I went in the bank, the lady looked at me all crazy.

35:42And I said, so then I said, I tell you what, I'll go, I'm going to go get my mother

35:46and bring

35:46her in.

35:47Me and my mother went to the bank that we thought he was putting the money in.

35:54And then finally she, I shouldn't say, but she found a bank that had his name on it.

36:04But the lady looked at it and she says, what's your name?

36:07And mama told her and she said, okay, you ain't the same person.

36:11It was up on another person's name, female name.

36:16And, and, you know, my mom was like, Hmm, this is the reason why you never told me about

36:22this extra money.

36:24Oh, I get it.

36:26Yes.

36:27Oh, wow.

36:27And then we, she was, you know, living in the house and she said, Hey, could you, I had

36:34moved out.

36:34She said, Hey, can you come by?

36:35I got this letter.

36:37I need you to read it for me.

36:38I said, yeah, sure.

36:39I went over there and I'm like, Whoa.

36:41I said, mom, we're going to have to get up out of here.

36:42And she was like, what?

36:44I said, you sent him payment.

36:48I said, you been sending your house payment in?

36:50And she said, yes.

36:52And I'm like, I should know that.

36:54Cause I'm the one that, you know, put, you know, uh, get the money order for and everything

37:00and come to find out he had took out a loan that he had told nobody about and refinanced

37:09the house.

37:11They did not get paid.

37:13So they was going to take the house back.

37:17And the, you know, and the company said, don't send them on.

37:20I said, mama, I said, they already said, don't send no more payments in, but you sending payments

37:25in.

37:26She said, well, you know, I can't read.

37:28I said, well, where the letters at?

37:29She had took the letters and just stuff them in the drawer.

37:34So, I mean, I got, you know, I got her out in time and I got her out two weeks

37:42later.

37:42I went by cause she said that she thinks she forgot something in the house.

37:46And I went by the house because she said up in the attic is a lot of your stuff that

37:52you

37:52had, you know, like musical stuff.

37:55And I'm like, really?

37:55She said, yeah, you're real to real, you're real to real.

37:59And all that was up there.

38:01Hey man, I put that lock in there and said, Hey, you know, Hey, it's too late now.

38:05I couldn't even get in the house.

38:09Yeah.

38:09That's interesting.

38:10But yeah, so that's why I'm saying, I know a lot of people who said that their dad has

38:19did something or their mom had did something.

38:22They didn't even know nothing about it.

38:24And guess what?

38:25When it was in the bank, the state got it.

38:29Yeah.

38:29And maybe that's, that's what they want because then it goes back and everything's lost and

38:36it's a game for them.

38:39Right.

38:40And so like, you know, we was trying to figure out and, you know, I mean, yeah, my mom, she

38:47cried a little bit about it.

38:48And I say, no, there ain't no sense of crying about it.

38:51It's done with now, you know?

38:53And I said, wherever this money went to, you didn't get it.

38:58That's for sure.

39:00But my dad was the one who said, y'all would never get nothing I have.

39:06He was already like that.

39:07You know, we already knew that.

39:09That's why when he made that comment, I said, hey, man, you shooting at me about that?

39:13I said, I don't.

39:14And I just told him, I said, man, I don't want nothing you got, man.

39:17I said, hey, you don't raise me.

39:19I know how to take care of myself.

39:21Well, hey, I said, I said, everything you got is for you and mama.

39:25All right.

39:27Yeah, it's definitely a touchy, tricky situation.

39:33And I could see why some people shy away from, you know, dealing with this.

39:41Yeah.

39:42But if you care about the people that are going to be left behind, you definitely would do

39:47something and put stuff in place.

39:49So, you know, yeah, you know, I tell people, I say, man, you know, get a safe and, you know,

39:58just all your stuff, you know, like your bank accounts, whatever it is, just put it in,

40:03put it in the safe at your house.

40:06Yeah, that's, that's a good idea, you know.

40:09And, you know, passwords, insurance policy, because you know what?

40:12She may have insurance policy that, that, you know, that's not even any good and she don't

40:17even know it.

40:19Like the title of the show, my daughter knows my birthday, because you know, they want to

40:23ask you the birth date, the year and all this stuff.

40:26Exactly.

40:26What's, what's the point of knowing all that information?

40:29If that's the only thing you're going to be able to give them after that, you don't

40:32know anything else or where anything else is.

40:35Exactly.

40:36That's crazy.

40:37And I just think, like I said, you know, she, and I, you know, I really shouldn't say it

40:43like that, but she hasn't been, I don't like, because I use this word, she hasn't been educated

40:50to talk to at least one person in the family.

40:56You know, and I always tell, you know what I mean?

40:58I've had people, people my age, you know, we talk about it and I tell me, man, you know,

41:04I heard guys, man, I ain't giving, my kids ain't getting nothing from me.

41:08You know, I mean, Hey, I've worked hard.

41:09They can work hard.

41:10I mean, okay.

41:11Hey, I understand that everybody don't feel that way.

41:13You know, that's some ignorant mess right there.

41:16Yeah.

41:17I said, yeah.

41:17I said, but Hey, I said, everybody don't feel that way, man.

41:20I said, but you know, it's like this, whatever you got, you can't take it with you.

41:25Exactly.

41:26So now you, what you just said, not a family go back and forth, arguing and carrying on

41:33fighting over stuff because you didn't set things up properly.

41:36Yes.

41:38Crazy craziness.

41:40Hmm.

41:41I guess, I guess if people cared about where they were going afterwards, you would want

41:47to make sure you have a thing set up properly so that they can give you the proper burial

41:52and stuff.

41:53But I guess if people are ignorant like that and they can care less, I guess they don't

41:57even care about where they going, where they, or where they going to end up.

42:00Right.

42:01Right.

42:01And that happens a lot, you know, but like, I know probably, and, and, and she kind of sound

42:09like my dad was sit up and look at TV and see how what's going on in Hollywood and be

42:16saying, Oh, see, that's why I ain't saving you.

42:18I ain't putting nothing in the, in the name because look what's going on out there.

42:22But everybody is not like that.

42:24Mm-hmm.

42:25Mm-hmm.

42:25You know, everybody, everybody is not like that.

42:30You, if you don't, well, and then again, if you don't take time to know your kids, then

42:35yeah, yeah, mm-hmm.

42:39Wow.

42:40So this is a important aspect of having a financial plan so that your family don't have

42:48to struggle when you're not here.

42:49I like the safe thing, having a safe, having a key saying, Hey, listen, you ain't going

42:55to know what's going on in here.

42:56This is mine.

42:57This, this right here is my situation here.

42:59But in the event that something should happen, here's the key, here's where you go.

43:05And that's where you will be able to unlock and find everything.

43:09I like that.

43:10Yeah.

43:11And, you know, you know, and something else too.

43:14One of my uncles went through that and he had, let me see, he had like about four, four

43:21kids.

43:22He had four or five kids.

43:24And so like when he passed away, nobody knew anything.

43:31So the lady that was living with him, I don't even know if they was really married.

43:36She had the insurance policies.

43:39She cashed them in and she took off and went to Vegas.

43:44My uncle sit in the morgue for four months.

43:50That's, that's crazy.

43:53Yeah, because the kids didn't, none of the kids didn't know it, have any idea of where,

44:00and then she wouldn't talk to him.

44:02And then one of them said, she said, well, my dad had insurance policy.

44:07And then she said, well, you know, it's your dad.

44:12You figure out how to bury him.

44:14I got the money and I'm going to Vegas and they want, amen.

44:18They want to tear her head off.

44:20I'm sure they did.

44:21That's crazy.

44:23It's interesting how people get like, you know, when stuff like this happens.

44:28Yeah.

44:29And you know, the insurance policy, you know, I mean, I guess it's a lot of money to some,

44:34but it was like a $2,000 insurance policy.

44:38So one of my cousins, she got, she got an attorney and they, they did some research on it and

44:43they come to find out that they said, well, she didn't get nothing for it because he didn't pay, he

44:51didn't, oh, she, he didn't, she didn't get the entire amount of the insurance because he had just, he had

45:00only owned it for six months.

45:01And that's why I tell people, hey, when you get an insurance policy, you got, you got to pay longer

45:08than six months in order to collect anything back.

45:12That's a good, good point right there.

45:15And a lot of people, a lot of people don't know that.

45:19I'll be honest.

45:19I didn't know it until my uncle and all that situation.

45:23I'm like, I didn't know that.

45:25Oh, cause they, they, they get an insurance policy.

45:27They open it up.

45:28They think that, oh, they're in a clear.

45:30And then if it's under six months, now you got a situation.

45:35Yeah.

45:35They, you won't get, you won't get what the, say you got $10,000 policy and it's under six months.

45:44You don't get that.

45:45I mean, it has a, it has a two year.

45:47That's what it is.

45:48It's a two year thing.

45:50Once you get past that second year, then, okay, you can get money back, but until then you can't get

45:57nothing back.

46:00Yeah.

46:01You got to read that a fine print.

46:03Yeah.

46:03Yeah, exactly.

46:05That's why so many people say insurance, insurance is a scam.

46:10Cause a lot of people do.

46:12They think they say, oh, I got, I got, man, I got a $20,000 policy on me.

46:16Yeah.

46:16But if you, something happened within six months, you just pay some money and you ain't getting nothing back or

46:24your family's not getting nothing back.

46:26Yeah.

46:26That's when somebody explained it to me, it's like, it's insurance.

46:31So think about your car insurance.

46:33You sit there and you pay car insurance every month, every quarter, every year in the event that something happens.

46:42But most of the time, nothing happens.

46:45Exactly.

46:47And then when it does, they say, oh, well, the blue book value say your car is only worth $300.

46:54And then, you know, I've been paying on this insurance for, you know, 15 years.

46:59Well, I'm sorry, but, you know, hey, we going by the blue book.

47:03That is so true.

47:09Yeah.

47:09Oh my goodness.

47:10This is definitely a sticky topic here.

47:17Sensitive.

47:18That's a great word.

47:19Sensitive topic here.

47:21So I'm not going to spend too much time going back and forth on this.

47:26This is basically letting you know the importance of having things in order.

47:32And making sure that your family is set up for success, because that's one of the worst things to happen

47:39is when you have family members going back and forth with each other, arguing and carrying on because nothing was

47:46set up properly.

47:48Exactly.

47:48And so many families are split up behind stuff like this because, you know, like I said, a parent don't

47:58won't even tell anybody anything.

48:02And then you see people that come into the house, going through all the drawers.

48:06Yeah.

48:06Tearing stuff up.

48:08Exactly.

48:09Exactly.

48:11Craziness.

48:13Trying to figure things out, guessing passwords and and all of this nonsense.

48:18Yeah, that's craziness.

48:21And like you said, that Southern stuff, I don't know why we do that to our own people.

48:27We as Steve Harvey would say, it's not ignorant.

48:36It's ignorant.

48:38Yeah.

48:39But you got to realize they was raised like that, too.

48:43Their parents was like that.

48:44So, you know, it just and sometimes your parents would tell you and don't tell your kids everything.

48:53Or you have an uncle or aunt who said, oh, don't tell them everything.

48:59And that's something that you just for whatever reason, that's just something that you inherit.

49:08Pass on from generation to generation.

49:10Yeah.

49:10Yes.

49:11Yeah.

49:12Just some ignorant, ignorant mess.

49:16Yeah.

49:16That's basically it.

49:18Ignant.

49:19Oh, yeah.

49:20Wow.

49:21All right.

49:22So what you got going on this week?

49:26Oh, tomorrow evening.

49:28They're off of vacation.

49:30Off this summer vacation.

49:31It's journal for expressive writing.

49:33There's a reading on there.

49:35I'm going to be there.

49:36Saturday, do Saturday night live poetry reading out of Austin.

49:41And then Sunday afternoon, Artful Dodger out of Brooklyn, New York, another poetry reading.

49:48So, you know, I got my fill up for poetry this weekend.

49:53Okay.

49:54That's what's up.

49:55That's what's up.

49:56And then, you know, like I always say, you can go to Amazon.com slash Birdman313.

50:05You can go to Instagram, Birdman31355.

50:11You can go to YouTube, YouTube.com slash author, poet, Birdman31355.

50:20Spotify on the Coffee, Wine, and Word podcast.

50:24And you can find videos.

50:28So I hope I touched everything.

50:32All right.

50:33Yeah.

50:34But yeah, those are the places you can go.

50:36You can either, you can see pictures, you can see videos, or you can see my books.

50:42That's what's up.

50:44Now, I know we up against the clock, but I was sitting here thinking since last week,

50:48and I was like kicking myself about these two songs.

50:53We were talking about Frankie Beverly and Maze.

50:56It's the song that I thought of, that I should have said last week, is Can't Get Over You.

51:04Yeah.

51:05That's that one.

51:06That's that classic one.

51:08Yeah.

51:08And then we were talking about David Ruffin.

51:11So I said, let me go back.

51:13And today I went and played, I think it's called Going to Walk Away From Love.

51:19Yes.

51:19Yeah.

51:19That was my jam there.

51:21Yeah.

51:22Yeah.

51:23Yeah.

51:24Yeah.

51:25Yeah.

51:26So I just had to throw them back.

51:27I wanted to put that out there in the atmosphere so the 401 people know exactly what I was talking

51:33about, but that can't get over you.

51:35Yeah.

51:35You already know that that's going to go down when that starts coming on.

51:39Oh, yeah.

51:40I asked you a quick question.

51:42Do you like jazz?

51:44I do, but I can't really tell you too many musicians.

51:48I was going to say, if you ever get a chance, listen to Marion Meadows.

51:53I'm going to write this down.

51:54Marion Meadows?

51:55Yes.

51:56He's a saxophone player.

51:58He got some good, he got some real decent music for someone who doesn't get a lot of

52:03airplay.

52:04And I learned about him.

52:06Houston used to have a jazz station.

52:09That's how I learned about a whole lot of these players was, you know, when they had

52:13the jazz station.

52:15And then they shut it down for a while.

52:17Then when I went down to New Orleans to do restoration, they had a jazz station.

52:22There was several people that was off in the jazz.

52:25I mean, they would bring me, bring me CDs and, you know, I would get, I would give them

52:29the money back.

52:30I'm telling them, nah, I'm, you know, I know you working hard.

52:33You ain't making as much as me.

52:35And if you bought the CD, I will give you, I will, you know, give you the money back.

52:40And I have, you know, that's how I, that's how I got hooked on huge groove.

52:47And Paul Hardcastle was that way.

52:50Hmm.

52:51All right.

52:51I'm going to definitely look that up.

52:53Yeah.

52:54All right.

52:55We're going to go ahead and get on up out of here.

52:57I will see you next week.

52:59Same place, same time.

53:01And I'll talk to you.

53:04All right.

53:05Okay.

53:06Take care now.

53:06Take care.

53:07Yeah.

53:07Have a good night.

53:08Thank you, man.

53:09No problem.

53:10Take care.

53:11Oh, yeah.

53:13All right.

53:14Ladies and gentlemen, that was author poet Birdman 313.

53:18And we're going to go ahead and get on up out of here tonight.

53:29Thank you all so much for joining.

53:31And we got a lot of great things coming.

53:33And we got some live episodes coming up soon.

53:36So stay tuned.

53:37And we have, of course, Birdman 313.

53:40Some surprise guests that are going to be showing up.

53:44I'm going to be doing something with Queen Dawn Spirit.

53:47So, yeah.

53:48Stay tuned.

53:49Check me out on social media platforms.

53:50And you never know when you're actually going to see us live.

53:54Lights, cameras, and action.

53:56So take care, y'all.

53:58Have a good night.

54:37Bye-bye.

54:56Bye-bye.

54:58Bye-bye.

55:01Bye-bye.

55:02Bye-bye.

55:05Bye-bye.

55:06Bye-bye.

My Daughter Knows My Birthday But She Doesn't Know My Financial Plan | DISC 6: Vitality | 411 PODCAST (Episode 55)

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