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  • 2 days ago

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Fun
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00:00Who's that? Is that guy? Is that your man?
00:01No.
00:02No?
00:03Don't scare him by my wife. I'm a bodybuilder.
00:05You're a bodybuilder?
00:07That's awesome!
00:10What's your name, bodybuilder?
00:12Valentina.
00:13Valentina? And you just f***ing...
00:16Oh my God, Valentina!
00:21Look at the guy next to you. His dick went inside.
00:29Look at the guy next to him.
00:31Sir, take a deep breath.
00:34Valentina, that's amazing. How long have you been a bodybuilder?
00:38I started in 2014 and then I was three times Olympian.
00:42And then I competed at the Olympian in Vegas.
00:44And I'm from Russia, but I stuck here in COVID.
00:47And I stopped competing because it's survival mode, you know?
00:50And can I say, because maybe someone agreed,
00:54you saved my life because I was in very dark time with big depression.
00:59I didn't know why am I waking up because I lost my passion.
01:02And your comedy show, your jokes, your humor.
01:05You know, I didn't understand American, I didn't understand English well,
01:09but I just feel you and your humor and it helped me so much to go through immigration.
01:14And to start now...
01:25Thank you. Thank you for sharing that.
01:29Valentina, I'll f*** you.
01:42I never thought I'd say these words before.
01:46I didn't know that your tits are that strong.
01:55She scratched me with her nipples.
02:01I love you.
02:04I'm bleeding on the inside.
02:07You know, you live in DC now.
02:10By the way, she said she's a three times Olympic champion.
02:13Did you hear that?
02:17Yeah, Olympian athlete, but plays six.
02:20Okay, Olympian athlete.
02:21Six in the world, not bad, right?
02:22Six in the world, that's incredible.
02:24Six in the world.
02:25She is number six in the world Olympian.
02:29And imagine if I met the number one Olympian.
02:34Her tits had broken my ribs by now.
02:39Do we have any bodybuilders in here?
02:41Anyone else?
02:42You're a bodybuilder?
02:44Sweetie, I would not ever raise my hand
02:49while she is in the room.
02:52She's number six.
02:54You're number six billion.
02:57My love, never again.
03:00I'm sorry.
03:01I don't want to hurt your feelings.
03:02Even your husband goes, honey, that was embarrassing.
03:06Just because you do CrossFit downtown
03:09doesn't make you a fucking bodybuilder.
03:14Valentina, I apologize.
03:17She's on her period.
03:18She's not thinking straight.
03:22I only mention it because Valentina has not had a period in nine years.
03:28That's what happens.
03:29Am I correct?
03:30Yes, I'm correct.
03:32You see, when you do that...
03:36Any questions?
03:42You look so cute.
03:44I never give black people to my show.
03:47This is insane.
03:48We know the saxophone.
03:50You know the saxophone?
04:03She is.
04:06We know the saxophone.
04:08We know the saxophone.
04:09We don't even know his name.
04:11We know the saxophone.
04:14We know the saxophone.
04:15So you're friends with Dwight?
04:17Yeah?
04:17That's great.
04:19We used to date.
04:20You used to date Dwight?
04:22And now you call him saxophone?
04:27We used to date the saxophone.
04:31We used to date the saxophone.
04:32We used to date the saxophone.
04:32We used his mouth pretty good on that saxophone.
04:38now wait a minute all of you all three of you single yeah yeah yeah okay how long have you
04:43been single since you broke up with the weight now it's been a couple years it's been a couple
04:49years you broke up with him and you couldn't find any more love and now you came back in
04:55and go i might have made a mistake i need to go back and watch the saxophone i mean that
05:02man
05:03knows how to blow into a saxophone i need to get this guy back in my life dwight you owe
05:14me
05:16what do you do oh i do internal calls internal communication like just just within the company
05:23internally you communicate you don't communicate with anybody outside if i come in company just like
05:29i specifically my job is to communicate with the internal group in the company of the
05:35communication that's kind of cool brittany what do you do brittany i don't have all night
05:43it's not a fashion show what is it
05:49brittany what do you do are you trying to hypnotize me
05:55brittany what do you do what is it i'm a dancer oh you're a dancer
06:09is that why you were pausing you're a dancer can i be honest with you
06:16brittany i play saxophone i do that's why that's how i met dwight okay
06:26mimi what do you do web developer so you develop the website for brittany
06:34that's nice and between the three of you guys she communicates right
06:39i like this this is fun this is really good
06:45instead of this internal communication can i be the only external communication
06:51oh my god give it up for my three black girls
07:01china oh my god
07:03more my chinese more chinese oh hi so many chinese tonight i love this
07:12hi sweetie what's your name
07:14okay but i'm so happy you're here
07:18you said it you were there
07:20that was so fast
07:23so happy you're here did you know
07:27oh hi look how gorgeous they are what's your name
07:30oh that's cynthia chinese cynthia
07:40nice to meet you cynthia
07:42so great to see you and sir what's your name
07:45nick nick nick and cynthia
07:50the most chinese of chinese
07:53in the audience
07:55nick and cynthia from washington dc thank you for coming
07:59and you're so hip you know you're are you guys artists
08:03just chinese
08:06and then everything you're wearing is also made in china
08:11nice he goes yes that's amazing
08:14so you guys know that these tariffs are your fault
08:20you know this economy is crashing because of you
08:26oh i love you too and you're married you're both married
08:28i gotta tell you a story
08:30you have a story
08:30every night before we go to sleep
08:33she pull up like your video
08:34then we start watching watching watching
08:36then before i know it's another like 30 minutes gone
08:38i really gotta go
08:41i love you dude that's so sweet
08:44every night before they go to bed
08:47she brings my videos
08:51and says honey you gotta watch this comment
08:54they watch my videos for 30 minutes he said in bed
08:57and then afterwards they make love thinking about me
09:03it's unbelievable
09:04that's why i love my chinese fans
09:12how amazing would have been if i just put my hand in my pocket
09:15and pulled out a fortune cookie
09:19china is becoming
09:20i'm in the middle of chinese negotiation
09:27my brother i was solving the world's problem
09:34anybody here goes to a medium
09:35yeah you do
09:37who did you want to connect with
09:40oh your son oh my god
09:42well first of all sorry to hear that probably the hardest thing in life
09:45is to lose a child
09:48you lost two children
09:50my god
09:51my god my heart goes to you
09:54because i don't think anybody can imagine
09:56the the difficultness
09:58did you feel better after the experience
10:01yes and you had some closure
10:03you had some connection
10:04oh that's amazing
10:06and what's your name
10:07renee
10:08renee
10:08well thank you for sharing
10:10this is incredible
10:11and who are you here with
10:14your friend joanna
10:15she doesn't seem like a nice person
10:20sorry
10:20she seems nice
10:23there's always one bitch in the friendship
10:25i'm just saying
10:28but renee
10:29thank you for tolerating her
10:30yeah
10:32but no
10:33i'm just
10:34i only just made that joke
10:35because she grabbed her hand
10:36and she was
10:37calling me
10:40so
10:40you lost
10:42two of your sons
10:43two of your kids
10:44two different times
10:45oh my god
10:47and are you married
10:48i am now
10:50you're now married
10:51i was
10:52i lost him
10:53to my first marriage
10:53you lost your husband also
10:56no
10:57my first marriage
10:58i lost
10:58oh this is the only time you were like
11:00i wish i lost him
11:07oh shit
11:12are you kidding me
11:15oh my god
11:22this is so beautiful
11:25you fucked me up
11:28i was trying to destroy you
11:30and your husband
11:32i was coming with like
11:34oh
11:35oh
11:35thank you
11:36this is so beautiful
11:44oh you wrote this
11:45are you guys married
11:47not married
11:48thank god
11:51they wrote me a beautiful card
11:54your gift for turning everyday moments
11:57into pure hilarity
11:59is truly extraordinary
12:00thank you for the laughter
12:02energy
12:03and unforgettable memories
12:04and the big dick energy
12:06you bring to our house
12:10your presence lights up every room
12:13and your rare ability to bring joy
12:16joy through humor
12:17makes us feel lucky
12:19to have experienced it
12:22in times
12:22when smiles are needed most
12:25you gave us many
12:27and showed how powerful laughter can be
12:32thank you for sharing your talent
12:34with the world
12:35we're excited to see you
12:38and see what's next
12:39please let us know
12:41what's your only fans account
12:47this is so beautiful
12:48really
12:49really i'm shocked
12:50you did this
12:51i'm serious
12:55i'll put it here
12:58i'll put it like this
12:59it looks like it's my funeral flowers
13:07i mean
13:08this is so interesting
13:10that you did this
13:11you're mexican
13:13and he's indian
13:15and together
13:16you put your thoughts together
13:19and you bought such an expensive flower
13:22indians
13:23don't do this shit
13:31you know that conversation
13:33oh we need to give them some flowers
13:35i say
13:35oh okay
13:36we'll get one flower
13:37really good
13:38one more than enough
13:41honey
13:41honey we need to get a lot of flowers
13:43like a nice bouquet
13:44i don't know
13:45what is he gonna do with it
13:49i'm really grateful man
13:51really really grateful
13:57i don't know
13:58you know
13:58i dont remember
13:58i'm doing
13:59i mean
13:59i
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