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  • 2 days ago
Kylie Smylie

Teen singer Kylie Smylie visits the mall to sign some autographs for her fans and perform.

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TV
Transcript
00:00The time's less.
00:06Just play me for a fool.
00:08And you just wait.
00:11I said play me for a fool.
00:15You'll be mysterious today.
00:19You said play me for a fool.
00:23Oh, oh, oh.
00:25And walk away.
00:26Walk away.
00:28Yeah.
00:28Hey.
00:30That has to be the best Kylie Smiley song ever.
00:34I can't believe she's actually coming to the mall tomorrow for a record signing and a concert.
00:39Do you think one of us will win the Spend the Day with Kylie contest?
00:42Well, the essay I sent into our website was pretty much the best essay I've ever written.
00:47Mine was 5,000 words long.
00:49What?
00:49Mine was only 3,000 words.
00:51I'm sure word count has nothing to do with proving your fans.
00:55We're not fans.
00:56We're Smilies.
00:58Smilies?
00:58Don't you mean stockies?
01:00It's 3 o'clock.
01:02She should be sending out the winning phone message any second now.
01:05Please pick me.
01:06Please pick me.
01:07Me.
01:07Me.
01:09Hey, it's Kylie.
01:11Sorry, you lose.
01:13But like my song says, just cause you lost, don't make you a loser.
01:17But my essay was so good.
01:21Well, on the upside, not winning means you're still semi-cool.
01:26Hey, it's Kylie.
01:27Sorry, you lose.
01:28Get out of my phone.
01:29You entered the contest?
01:31As if I would voluntarily taint my phone with that.
01:34Must be a prank.
01:36Hey, it's Kylie.
01:38Thanks for entering the contest, Caitlin.
01:41I can't wait to spend the day with you tomorrow, because you won.
01:46I won.
01:48No fair.
01:49Two 3,000 word essays for nothing.
01:51Two?
01:52You entered me in the contest.
01:55What?
01:55I would have taken your spot.
02:01How's my hair?
02:02Is my outfit okay?
02:03Anything with my teeth?
02:04You look perfect.
02:06I'm so happy for you, I could cradle something.
02:10Not that I'm jealous.
02:12It's okay.
02:13Be jealous.
02:14I'm about to go with Kylie to a record signing and a photo op and watch her concert from the
02:19front row.
02:20Huh?
02:21The name's Garcia.
02:22Jonesy Garcia.
02:23I'm part of Kylie's security detail.
02:25What?
02:26How did you qualify for the job?
02:28I'm not at liberty to say.
02:30Oh, Estelle, you're so graceful.
02:32It's like dancing with an angel.
02:35Ahem.
02:37I know what you're thinking.
02:39What's it going to take to keep this quiet?
02:44Anywho, Kylie's in safe hands now.
02:47If anyone can spot a creep, it's me.
02:49Takes one to know one.
02:51I can tell you're feeling insecure about this, babe.
02:53And rightly so.
02:54I'm secure?
02:55You'll be fired by lunch.
02:57The bodyguard superstar relationship can get intimate.
03:00So if Kylie flirts with me, and she will, obviously I'll have to flirt back.
03:06But it won't mean anything, I swear.
03:09Don't even think about it.
03:11Kylie's not allowed to date till she's 21.
03:13And her dadager will hurt any guy who even winks at her.
03:17Dadager?
03:17Dad slash manager.
03:19He used to be some pro wrestler.
03:21Sergeant...
03:21Beef?
03:22Her dad is Sergeant Beef?
03:24The Alberta Herda?
03:25He was a total beast.
03:27Yeah, and he had a smoke and finish and move, too.
03:30The cow pie.
03:33Special security detail, Jonesy Garcia reporting for duty, Sarge.
03:37Pleasure's all mine.
03:39Okay, no pleasure.
03:40Just business.
03:42You must be Caitlyn.
03:43I'm Kylie.
03:44I love your outfit.
03:47Thanks.
03:48Oh, I love your everything.
03:51These are my friends.
03:53Nikki.
03:53Hey.
03:54Jen.
03:54I, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh,
03:58uh, uh.
03:58And Jude.
04:00You are crazy hot.
04:04You're looking for a cow pie.
04:07No thanks, bro.
04:09Peace out.
04:11Is it okay if Jen gets a photo up with Kylie?
04:13I, uh, gotta...
04:16Never gonna happen.
04:17Let's roll!
04:18Sorry, Jen.
04:19I'll just try...
04:20Nope.
04:21Okay, let me just squeeze...
04:23Whoa!
04:23Oh, sure.
04:24I'll just run alongside.
04:25All day.
04:27No prob.
04:29Bye!
04:31Bye!
04:31God...
04:32B-bye...
04:34I'm king of the dudes!
04:43Release the kitsch, Ross.
04:45What did you say?
04:46I said, could you maybe, um, loosen the grip and let me ride?
04:51No, I think you said you want a new hat.
04:56Whoa!
04:58Hide me!
04:59Go away!
05:00I've never been so humiliated.
05:03I had my chance and blew it.
05:05Well, there's always a record signing.
05:07You're right!
05:07I'll bring all my Kylie collectibles and prove I'm not a total loser.
05:11Yeah, just a partial loser.
05:13Baby steps.
05:17Whoo!
05:18Should have had a...
05:19A bigger breakfast!
05:21Knees off eyes and ears open, Agent Maggot.
05:23No one gets near.
05:25Smiley.
05:27Take her to warp speed.
05:29We're overrun!
05:34Legs on fire.
05:35Everything!
05:37So sparkly!
05:39What a life!
05:41It's so exciting!
05:43Do you bring your friends on the road?
05:45I don't really have friends.
05:47No time.
05:48Real friends come before everything.
05:51Except maybe for Circe hot guys.
05:53Totally!
05:54If only Daddy would let me meet a hot guy.
05:57Oh, um...
05:59Know where we can get some grub?
06:00I know the perfect place!
06:03Burger McFlipsters, please, driver!
06:04The coast is clear.
06:07The dude will stunt.
06:09Woo-hoo-hoo!
06:15Yeah!
06:17Oh, no fair, dude.
06:20That's neutral territory.
06:22And before you ask,
06:24no, I do not want a new hat.
06:27How about a new outfit?
06:43Not cool!
06:46Okay, I've got all our DVDs,
06:48every Kylie Beat magazine,
06:49plus all our CDs, pins, socks,
06:51and press-on nails.
06:53Wasn't the goal to look less creepy?
06:55Hey!
06:55Jude?
06:57More like Judith.
06:58What happened?
06:59Escalator girls have a hate on for the Jude-ster.
07:03Aw, what did the Jude-ster do to them?
07:05Beg for mercy.
07:06Jude, you can't let them see you're scared.
07:08They feed on fear.
07:10It's your mall as much as theirs.
07:11Next time, read in the Riot Act.
07:13You're right.
07:15I'll do it!
07:17Don't suppose you've got a copy of that Riot Act on you?
07:21If your burger tastes like ribeye,
07:23we've done our job for you.
07:25If your burger tastes like donut,
07:28then something wrong got through.
07:30Kylie, this is my friend Wyatt.
07:33Wyatt?
07:34This is Kylie!
07:35Any friend of Caitlyn's is a friend of mine.
07:38Holy pop-tarts!
07:40I gotta say, you have an amazing singing voice.
07:43Thanks.
07:43So does Kylie.
07:45You know that song, Awesome, Awesome, Awesome?
07:47Sorry, never heard of it.
07:49Rad Tights?
07:50Hot to Trot?
07:51Spanking Good?
07:52Come on!
07:53Even I know Mr. Yesterday.
07:55Oh, that song?
07:57Man, that's the worst song I ever heard.
07:59Wyatt!
08:01That's you?
08:02Oh, man.
08:04I didn't mean...
08:05Pop music isn't my bag.
08:06But you have a really beautiful face...
08:08Voice.
08:10Oh, um, thank you.
08:11Here.
08:12Let me make it up to you with a Wyatt special.
08:14On the house.
08:17Mmm.
08:18This is the best burger I've ever had.
08:21That's why we're here.
08:23Your dad scared me.
08:25Sent me to tell you we have to be at Spin This
08:28for the record signing in two.
08:30Whew.
08:31Kay, thanks for the burger, Wyatt.
08:34Maybe I'll see you at the signing?
08:36He'll be there.
08:37What Kylie wants, Kylie gets.
08:39Eee!
08:41She wants you.
08:42How did you do it, man?
08:44I have no idea.
08:49Wow.
08:49This line is full of winners.
08:51I'm so excited.
08:52Your sarcasm has no effect on me.
08:55Really?
08:56Then why am I even here?
09:00Security escorts, adoring fans, and endless bowls of designer truffles?
09:06Being a pop star is the best!
09:09Yeah, it's okay.
09:10But between us, you know what I'd rather be doing right now?
09:14Shopping!
09:15Ooh!
09:15Pop quiz.
09:16Accessories or shoes?
09:18Both!
09:19Hi, Kylie.
09:20Thanks again for doing the signing.
09:22Cappuccino?
09:23Thanks.
09:24And this one's for my best friend, Caitlyn.
09:27That's me!
09:27Eee!
09:29You!
09:30Anyone with more than five items is a threat.
09:33So weed them out.
09:34Starting with the babbler.
09:36Eee!
09:38Yeah.
09:39This isn't gonna be awkward.
09:42Wyatt, you came.
09:44Wouldn't miss it for the world.
09:52All clear for takeoff.
09:54Woo-hoo-hoo!
09:58Wah!
10:00Okay, bros.
10:02Can't we all just chill?
10:04Well, according to Beef, you have a threatening number of items.
10:09So you gotta lose all but five pronto.
10:12But how can I not show her my Kylie cape?
10:13Or the grilled cheese she took a bite out of that I bought online.
10:17Okay, cuckoo bird.
10:18Let's smooth out the feathers and pick a fave five.
10:21Make an exception.
10:22We're family.
10:23Kylie!
10:24Hey, over here!
10:25Remember my essays?
10:26Sign my standards.
10:27Caitlyn, tell her I'm awesome!
10:29Gah!
10:29No!
10:30I'm sane, I tell you!
10:32SANE!
10:37So, I took your advice.
10:40Enough is enough.
10:41I'm gonna go set those Escalator Gorillas straight.
10:44Could you set me straight first, brah?
10:47Wyatt!
10:48Have you been working out?
10:50Not unless flipping burgers counts.
10:52Oh, you!
10:54So, Chad and I broke up.
10:56Yeah?
10:57But you'll get back together again eventually, right?
11:00Not this time.
11:01He'll never be the man you are.
11:04I shouldn't have let you go.
11:06Really?
11:07Wow.
11:09Thanks for introducing me to Wyatt.
11:11He seems really sweet.
11:13He's an amazing songwriter, too.
11:15Perfect boyfriend material.
11:17Wyatt?
11:18But your dad won't let you date till you're 21.
11:20So you can help me.
11:23What daddy doesn't know won't hurt him.
11:25But what Wyatt doesn't know might.
11:31Wyatt's so great.
11:33You have to help me ask him out while daddy's busy.
11:36Yeah, Wyatt's great, but he kind of needs all his fingers to play guitar.
11:39And if your daddy finds out...
11:43Oh, thank goodness.
11:45I mean, darn it!
11:47Looks like Wyatt's getting back together with his ex.
11:52Sorry, Kylie.
11:57Be careful, brah.
11:59It's like they all share the same evil brain.
12:03Yeah.
12:04Hey, escalator trolls.
12:06Newsflash.
12:07You don't own them all.
12:09Oh, wussy brought a body girl.
12:12Oh, you three need to get a life.
12:14And some mouthwash by the reek of it.
12:17Easy, Nicky.
12:19You guys think you're so tough.
12:23Nicky.
12:24Well, you're about as tough as a bi...
12:26Hey!
12:27Hey, put me down!
12:31Tried to warn you, brah.
12:34This means war!
12:39So, will you give me another chance?
12:42I can't believe I'm saying this, but no.
12:47I'm sorry, Serena.
12:48I never thought I'd get over you, but I guess I have.
12:51Maybe it's time for you to do the same.
12:54Okay.
12:55That was intense.
12:57I just told Serena that she needs to get over me.
13:01I'm the man!
13:02So, so you two aren't...
13:05Cool.
13:06This is my, uh, private number.
13:09I'd love to see you again.
13:11Really?
13:13Me too.
13:16Yay!
13:18This is so great!
13:19What could possibly go wrong?
13:26Go on, be happy.
13:27See what I care.
13:28Oh, she signed my shirt.
13:30Oh, I'm so awesome.
13:36Let me guess.
13:37You're in a rubber truck on your way to a padded room?
13:40Nope.
13:40I ran away before the truck arrived.
13:42Well, thanks to the escalator girls, I now smell like coffee dregs and half-eaten tacos.
13:47Gross!
13:48But they will pay.
13:49Oh, yes, they will.
13:51I hope it'll be easier than getting past Beef and Jonesy.
13:54I hate to say it, but for once, he's actually good at his job.
13:57I know, it's so unfair, but Kylie's doing a photo op at Taj Mahone Video, and I have the perfect
14:03disguise.
14:04So, what are you going to do about the escalator girls?
14:07I am going to break them.
14:11Special Ops Task Force ready for deployment.
14:14ETA to next drop zone Taj Mahone Video.
14:17T minus two minutes.
14:20Jonesy, Kylie's into Wyatt.
14:23Our Wyatt?
14:24Dread's low self-esteem Wyatt?
14:25Yes, and he's totally clueless about Kylie's dad and his no-dating rule.
14:31That could be fatal.
14:32Come on, BFF.
14:34Eee, coming!
14:36You have to warn Wyatt about Sergeant Beef before it's too late.
14:39I'm on it!
14:44Kylie's hot, but Beef is dangerous.
14:47Stay awake?
14:48Still making jokes about me working at a burger joint?
14:51Weak.
14:54Mission accomplished.
14:56Thanks.
14:57Welcome, Kylie.
14:59Please stand here amongst our beautiful dancers.
15:01Sure thing.
15:02Hi, everyone.
15:05Hi, everyone.
15:11Security breach.
15:13Lock it down!
15:15Lock it down!
15:17Ah!
15:19Jen?
15:20I swear I'm not a stalker.
15:22Stalkers don't have boyfriends, but I do.
15:24Long distance, but still.
15:25Just sign my sandwich and let me smell your hair.
15:28Ah!
15:28I don't know why I just said that.
15:30I need a photo with you.
15:32I'm so sorry.
15:34She's very goal-oriented, but harmless, I swear.
15:37Hey, I owe her one for causing the distraction.
15:40Wish me luck with Wyatt.
15:42Huh?
15:45I stood beside her.
15:47Kylie, Kylie, I...
15:50Hey, where is Kylie?
15:52Show starts in 15.
15:53Any idea where she went?
15:57Hi.
15:59Whoa.
15:59Hi.
16:00Anywhere we can be alone for a bit?
16:03Really?
16:03Uh, yeah.
16:05I know just the place.
16:08Kylie!
16:10Kylie!
16:11Kylie!
16:12Everyone's looking for you and whoever else you might be with!
16:16Ah!
16:17Is she with a boy?
16:18You shouldn't get so mad.
16:20It makes your veins all bulgy and gross.
16:22When I was alone, you brought me the dawn.
16:27I wish I was home.
16:30I wish I was home.
16:30Why have you gone?
16:33Oh, why have you gone?
16:36That's my heart is coming?
16:37That sounded so good.
16:39My goosebumps have goosebumps.
16:41Caitlin was right.
16:42You're a great songwriter.
16:45Oh, no!
16:46The concert!
16:47Sorry, Travis. I tried to get you a picture with Kylie.
16:52Which way to the concert stage?
16:54Through the food court, turn left.
16:56You're the best. Say cheese.
17:00Kylie?
17:01Look! Jen found Kylie, not Wyatt!
17:05Guess I had you wrong, babbler.
17:13I got my photo!
17:19I was sulking, and she asked me a question, and I answered, and she hugged me!
17:23Okay, and we're breathing now?
17:30You might be the one
17:34Yeah, you might be the guy
17:39Play your cards right, stick around for a while
17:43But play me for a fool
17:46And you just wait
17:48I said play me for a fool
17:51And you'll be misty yesterday
17:58Yeah, play me for a fool
18:00And oh, oh, oh
18:03Walk away, walk away
18:08Hey, guys
18:09I want a full report after the show
18:12Thank you
18:13Now I want to sing a new song by a special new friend
18:18Come on up, Wyatt
18:20Wyatt?
18:21Wyatt?
18:22Wyatt!
18:23Don't let me down, Wyatt. Come on
18:25Oh, I guess that makes sense, too
18:30I can totally vouch for Wyatt, sir
18:33He's solid gentleman material
18:34On a cold and rainy day
18:37Never mind
18:39In a small cafe
18:41Yeah
18:42I waited
18:43And waited
18:45For you
18:48We had a seaside view
18:52The walls we pushed through
18:55I waited
18:59And waited
19:03And waited
19:05For you
19:10When I was alone
19:12You brought me the door
19:15I wish I was home
19:18Why have you gone?
19:22Ow!
19:25Daddy!
19:35Something tells me I'm fired
19:37I think I'm coming down from my celebrity high
19:46At least you didn't wrestle an angry building
19:48Serves you right, keeping me away from Kylie all day
19:51Well, beef says I can date Kylie
19:54In five years
19:56Oh, Escalator girls
19:57Come out and play ye
20:02He does not want to live, does he?
20:04Check out this tasty maneuver
20:07Eat my dust, bros
20:10Woo-hoo-hoo!
20:12Woo-hoo-hoo!
20:16Three 811s
20:17Indecent exposure of underthings
20:19Punishment
20:20Immediate mall expulsion
20:22Yay!
20:23Way to go, guys!
20:25Woo-hoo!
20:27Told you I'd take care of it
20:28Bra, I will never doubt you
20:31Or cross you
20:33Again
20:33Vi-hoo-hoo!
20:33www. sostien a CaptainTown
20:35ȚRO
20:36idizn a Reaper
20:36Entzieh
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