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00:00Transcrição e Legendas por Quintena Coelho
00:30Yes, hello! Welcome to Taskmaster Australia.
00:37My name is Tom Gleeson and I am this country's only Taskmaster.
00:41This is, in many ways, the Sydney Olympics of television.
00:44Heroes will be born, hearts will be broken
00:46and ultimately it should bring about $7 billion to the Australian economy.
00:50And why do it?
00:52So one lucky athlete can come home with this.
00:55My beautiful head cast in gold.
00:57On the starting blocks tonight are the same contestants we always have.
01:03Dania Walker, Jimmy Rees, Julia Morris, Luke McGregor and Nina Yama.
01:13And what would an Olympics be without its Nicky Webster,
01:16it's my cute little super starlet Tom Cashman.
01:19Our first task is a prize task.
01:25Each of our contestants have brought in a prize.
01:27The best one will be awarded five points
01:29and the contestant who wins this episode will walk home with all five prizes.
01:34Tonight, they've been asked to bring in what they consider to be
01:36the coolest thing they've found on a walk within one kilometre of their house.
01:42A great prize task and a great incentive to do 15 minutes of light exercise.
01:46Luke, what did you find?
01:49Some people are lucky enough to live near a view with a nice bench
01:52and I don't live next to that.
01:55One of the people in my neighbourhood took it upon themselves
01:57to create a sitting spot with a view and I found this.
02:01I just had a thought too, because I brought in the chair,
02:08that means there is no longer that view spot anymore.
02:11So you didn't bring in the view,
02:13which was the thing that you seemed to be most captured by.
02:16Yeah.
02:16Yeah, no, there was a mistake we made.
02:20OK, Jimmy, what did you bring in?
02:23I go there all the time and it's a cool, hipster, wankery kind of cafe.
02:28I attempted to haul it here, but I just had to steal some menus.
02:32Here it is.
02:34Look at all the funky titles to all the meals.
02:37You can tell the baristas have long beards and man buns.
02:42OK, Nina, what have you hauled in?
02:44Well, I live 350 metres from Anthony Albanese's office.
02:49Oh.
02:49Um, so I brought a Marrickville pork roll.
02:58All right, so talk us through the pork roll.
03:00They are delicious and, um, if they see this and want to sponsor me,
03:03I would love to get some free food.
03:06OK.
03:07But is it cool?
03:09It is pretty cool, yes.
03:10Thank you, the crowd has spoken.
03:12Your opinion doesn't matter.
03:14Enjoy the rest of the show.
03:17Danielle, what did you bring in for us?
03:19I have to preface this with I don't live near a beach or river system.
03:26And so on a walk, I found a crab that was alive.
03:31OK.
03:31It was in the middle of a freaking park.
03:34What?
03:35Yeah, I just found a crab.
03:36I don't know if a bird dropped it.
03:38This is the photo of it.
03:39It was that big.
03:40Oh.
03:40Yeah, it's a pretty big crab, I thought, for a park.
03:44Were you not tempted to boil it up and eat it?
03:46Once, Mum made me shelf 15 kilos of prawns at Christmas and I went off seafood since then.
03:51OK.
03:52Unnecessary detail, but I liked it.
03:54Julia.
03:55Well, at the corner of my street is one of those amazing, you know, those, like, blow up things.
04:00There he is!
04:01You brought that in.
04:04Yes, sir, I did.
04:05But, yeah, the, woo!
04:06It's a lot of fun.
04:08I mean, it's no chair.
04:12Which brings me to the scoring, Luke.
04:15I think you have to be at the bottom on one because it's just a chair.
04:18Yeah.
04:19Why are you feeling sorry for an ordinary-looking man who brought in a chair?
04:27So we've got Luke on one.
04:29Nina, it's just a pork roll and they're pretty cheap.
04:31It's the best pork roll in Sydney.
04:33But it's unimpressive.
04:34OK.
04:35All right.
04:35So, Jimmy, you're on three with your menu.
04:37Cool.
04:38On four points, I'm going to go with Danielle with the crab.
04:42Julia, the inflator.
04:43Well, man, it's the coolest, surely.
04:45Five points.
04:46Yeah.
04:47Colour and movement.
04:49All right, well, let's start digging into the good gear, Tom.
04:52All right.
04:52But I must warn you, I have a sinking feeling.
04:55By which I mean, I have a good feeling that this next task relates to sinking.
05:10Hi.
05:11Hi, Jimmy.
05:12It's so far away.
05:16Well, well, well, Tom.
05:18Welcome to the dock.
05:19Thank you so much, sir.
05:21You look like a celebrant at a wedding.
05:24What's that about?
05:25The ball.
05:27Yeah.
05:28You'll see.
05:28Do you want me to just go to, or do you want to catch up, or what do you want to?
05:31Maybe you just go to.
05:32Just do it.
05:33Sink the bowling ball.
05:35Sink the bowling ball.
05:35You cannot get wet.
05:37The fastest wins.
05:38Sink the bowling ball.
05:41Oh, I...
05:42Oh, oh.
05:43Your time starts now.
05:45I'm glad it says you can't get wet, because that would be on my list regardless.
05:49Sink the bowling ball.
05:50It's ridiculous.
05:51OK.
05:52So that's all there is to it.
05:54Just sink the bowling ball.
05:55Yeah.
05:56All right.
05:57Who are you showing me first?
05:59It's Luke and Danielle.
06:00What technique do you use?
06:01Have you cricketed?
06:02What technique do you use?
06:03Have you cricketed?
06:06OK.
06:06Well, I'll just do this thing.
06:13Ah, this is not very fast.
06:20The current.
06:21Please hit the ball.
06:26Oh, my God.
06:32It's not sinking.
06:42Ah!
06:43You've tricked me.
06:44Must be one of those light ones.
06:46What'd you get a light one for?
06:47Get a bowling ball.
06:48It's a...
06:49Oh, OK.
06:51OK.
06:52So I've got to now make him sink.
06:56Oh, God.
06:57All right.
06:58How do you row?
06:59Is this supposed to stick?
07:00I've never actually rowed before.
07:01How do I get into the...
07:02Sure.
07:03Tom?
07:06Tom, am I moving in the right direction?
07:09Tom?
07:10Oh, no.
07:11I wish I knew how to row.
07:13OK.
07:14No.
07:15No!
07:16No!
07:17No!
07:18Get to the ball!
07:19Come on.
07:20No, the wind!
07:21No!
07:22I don't know if I just get stuck out here forever.
07:24Grab the...
07:25Pull me to the ball.
07:26Thank you.
07:27Keep going.
07:28Keep going.
07:29We're close.
07:30Thank you.
07:31Thank you.
07:32Thank you.
07:36Don't help me.
07:37I'm fine.
07:38I didn't know bowling balls floated.
07:40I'm going to put it in this crab pot.
07:42Let's go.
07:43OK.
07:49My bum's not wet, by the way.
07:50I piss my pants in the boat.
07:51It's not water.
07:52And piss doesn't count as wet?
07:53No.
07:54It's...
07:55That's...
07:56That's...
07:57That's different.
07:59What the fuuuuuck?
08:00What?
08:02Yeah!
08:03No!
08:04No!
08:05No!
08:06No!
08:07No!
08:08No!
08:09No!
08:10No!
08:11No!
08:12No!
08:13No!
08:14No!
08:15No!
08:16No.
08:17No!
08:18No!
08:19No!
08:20No!
08:21No!
08:22No!
08:23No!
08:24No!
08:25No.
08:26No!
08:27No!
08:28No!
08:29Yes!
08:30That is...
08:31You.
08:32I'm making fun of.
08:33No!
08:34Ok.
08:42Please, please, please, please, please.
08:48It's under the water.
08:50Look at that.
08:51That sank.
08:53Like I said, I wet my pants.
08:55It's not from the water.
08:57So, Luke, I'll accept that you weren't wet if you're happy to admit here in front of all of your peers that that was 100% human piss.
09:08Is that fair?
09:10I'm worried I'll say it was piss and then you'll give me one point anyway.
09:14Well, you've got nothing to lose.
09:17I don't want to answer any more questions without my lawyer.
09:20So, in the end, you just put it in the sink. So, did you consider that sinking the bowling ball?
09:26Yeah, if someone said those dishes need sinking, that means they need putting in the sink.
09:31You took a very long time, Danielle.
09:34Yeah, I fully know that because I disassembled the full thing that the bowling ball was on to try and wrap the chains around the ball.
09:41I reckon I did that for 15 to 20 minutes before I realised I couldn't wrap chains around the ball.
09:47Would you like to know how long they took?
09:49Yeah.
09:50So, Luke put the ball in the sink after 14 minutes and 6 seconds.
09:53Wow.
09:54I've got two more contestants. One loves pretending to be a woman. The other would be in prison if she was a man. Here's Jimmy and Julia.
10:05Damn it! I knew it would float. I knew it would float.
10:17And that's why this is here.
10:19Launching a vessel, sir. I haven't done this since the late 70s.
10:23Stupid Tom and his stupid tasks with his stupid things.
10:27We're going in!
10:29I'm not mucking around, babe.
10:30Is there any eels in here?
10:32We are going in!
10:35Yes!
10:38Going with one oar.
10:40Been working out the arms, Tom. Don't want to brag.
10:42Fastest wins!
10:43Woo!
10:44Ah!
10:45I am the fastest!
10:46Okay, still not wet.
10:47Come here, bowling ball.
10:48Here we go.
10:49Now.
10:50Put this under here like this and there you go, sunk it.
10:53Is your hand getting wet there?
10:54Not wet by the very definition of it.
11:08How would you define it?
11:13Soaking.
11:14Eu acho que é a definição.
11:16Como você define a water?
11:18Soaking.
11:20É muito warm, não é ruim.
11:22Como você sabe?
11:23Porque é na minha cabeça.
11:25Oh.
11:26Não está na terra, então não está na terra.
11:28Não está na terra.
11:30Mas é em um tipo de sink.
11:32Ok.
11:33Você pode tocar com a sua mão também?
11:35Não.
11:36Rô, rô, rô.
11:40É provavelmente minha piora ainda, é?
11:42Não sei.
11:44Não sei.
11:45É que não acelar.
11:46Ben, não é?
11:47Bem, define as é.
11:48Carvered ou saturado em água ou outro líquido.
11:50Ok, eu estou com tudo com.
11:52Eu estou quando há um verão verdão e ir me virar minhas,
11:55e me levaria para o rôo.
12:04É a razão que nós não escolhemos de um pão...
12:07Porque aquele pão ficou um pouco ingresso?
12:08Então ficou ús...
12:09Foi ful...
12:10É pão...
12:11A bola?
12:12A bola?
12:13I knew it had something tricky.
12:15That would be crazy if it was only now we told you
12:18that the lake had a bola.
12:20It would have made the challenge a lot harder.
12:23You seem like you were disqualifying yourself there, Jimmy.
12:26No, no, no.
12:27I think I defined wet at the end.
12:29Okay.
12:30And it pretty much said submerged in water.
12:32Okay, well you were wet on the front of your legs.
12:34That was front legs.
12:36This is from my mate over here.
12:38He was there before me.
12:39He missed himself. He admitted that now.
12:42I'm happy to admit it if I get five points.
12:44I think I'm going to accept that everyone got a little bit wet,
12:47so I'm going to just put that aside,
12:48because I think the spirit of the rule
12:50was that you couldn't jump out with the bowling ball
12:52and completely submerge it while getting into the lake.
12:54Otherwise we definitely would have done that.
12:58What are the times so far?
13:00So Julia sank the ball in eight minutes and 14 seconds.
13:05Jimmy sank the ball in two minutes and four seconds.
13:09Okay, who's throwing some pins across the lake next?
13:14Her surname means small mountain in Japanese,
13:16but she's got a big mountain to climb here.
13:18It's Nina Oyama.
13:20Wait, what's the point of the task? Sorry.
13:22Fastest. Okay.
13:23I meant there's a boat here.
13:25There is a boat there.
13:26Oh my God.
13:27Okay.
13:28Is this how you...
13:29What?
13:30I can't believe this works.
13:35Hey!
13:39Did I?
13:40I did it.
13:43It's like, you can use the boat.
13:46The catch with this boat is that you have to get it back.
13:49Oh my God.
13:50What a time.
13:55Oh, I need a lie down.
13:56You done?
13:57I think so.
13:58I'll just double check the brief again.
14:02Yeah, sink the...yeah.
14:03Yeah, I'm just done.
14:04You just go.
14:05Okay.
14:06What are you still filming?
14:07Oh!
14:10Forgot my...
14:14Alright.
14:15Here we go.
14:30Very early on in this series, you made a bet with Tom Cashman
14:32that you were going to win the whole thing.
14:34How do you think that bet's looking now?
14:35I mean...
14:38It's episode four.
14:40But yeah, pretty badly actually.
14:42I really regret that.
14:43So what happened after we finished filming is we left the bowling ball
14:46in the lake.
14:47So Nina's attempt is still ongoing.
14:52Her time currently stands at 78 days, 9 hours and 23 minutes.
15:01Okay.
15:02Can we have all the scores?
15:03Alright.
15:04Then one point for Nina, two for Danielle, three for Luke, four for Julia
15:07and the winner of the task with five points is Jimmy!
15:12And what has that done to our episode scoreboard?
15:15The winner so far is Julia with nine points.
15:21Okay Tom Cashman, I have a hunger that can only be associated with more tasks.
15:25Fine.
15:27I hope you're a breakfast at night kind of guy.
15:29Tom, are you in there?
15:44Yep.
15:45Can you see me if I do this?
15:46Yeah.
15:47Yeah.
15:50Hello Tom.
15:51Hi Danielle.
15:52Is he testing one too?
15:54Oh, sorry.
15:55That's a good look for you.
15:57You think?
15:58Yeah, doing something useful.
15:59Did you know that the sound man would easily be the sexiest man alive?
16:04Do you want to know why?
16:05Why?
16:06The man that listens.
16:07Oh.
16:08It's a joke for the ladies.
16:10Snap something!
16:11And crackle something!
16:12And pop something!
16:13Your first snap, crackle and pop counts.
16:18Most satisfying snap, crackle and pop wins.
16:20You have 20 minutes.
16:21So crackle.
16:22So crackle, I obviously want to set something alight.
16:25What's that last line?
16:26Oh my God.
16:27Honestly, it's like I've got a personal block.
16:30But your time starts now.
16:33Okay.
16:37So pretty straightforward.
16:38We're looking for satisfying snaps, crackles and pops.
16:42And your first snap, crackle and pop count.
16:44Alright, spare me up.
16:45Who's first?
16:46I don't know if he's good at the game snap, but he sure is a card.
16:49It's Luke McGregor.
16:51Okay, snap.
16:52I'll be back.
16:53I'll be back with something to snap.
16:56One of these didn't make a very loud snap.
16:58But I'm pretty certain if I snap a whole bunch,
17:01it'll make one loud big snap.
17:06Okay.
17:12That was not worth it.
17:21Crackle.
17:26I feel like that's going to be pretty loud.
17:27What would be a good pop?
17:29I can write a pop song.
17:30Tom Gleeson was a redhead.
17:35But then he lost all his hair.
17:40But I've still got mine.
17:45I'm just worried that's my future.
17:48So I'm using a lot of products to try and avoid that happening.
17:56Then, like, roll it down the keyboard, like, just sort of...
18:02You kind of wrecked it at the end there.
18:04Sorry.
18:05Thanks, Luke.
18:07See you on tour.
18:08Sorry, Tom.
18:09Sorry about that song.
18:10I think you look better without him, personally.
18:12I think it looks good.
18:19Luke, it was a great pop song.
18:20I really liked it.
18:21Would you like to sing it to my face?
18:22No.
18:24Are you sure?
18:25I forgot that I did that.
18:27I think you've forgotten that about a lot of your tasks.
18:29Yeah.
18:31Was that a crackle or more of a crunch or a bang?
18:33I thought if I just put the microphone in with the rice...
18:37Rice?
18:38A generic rice.
18:39A generic rice?
18:40Well, they would make a crackling sound.
18:42Would you like to know the definition of crackle?
18:44Yep.
18:45A rapid succession of short, sharp noises.
18:47Oh, it did that? It did that?
18:48I think it did no succession.
18:50It was just a thud.
18:52Alright, Tom.
18:53Who have we got next?
18:54Whether or not she can crackle, she sure is a crack-up.
18:56It's Danielle Walker.
18:58Most satisfying.
19:00It would be satisfying to shoot a gun.
19:02You're asking me to get you a gun?
19:03There's an eggshell in the bin.
19:05I can crackle that.
19:06This is the obvious choice.
19:08And you know I've been wanting to use this every day.
19:12I'm going to do crackle first.
19:20Okay, I've got three minutes or something?
19:22Two minutes and 42 seconds.
19:23Oh.
19:27One minute and five seconds.
19:28Oh, gosh.
19:29I'm not going to get this done, am I?
19:30That's my snap.
19:3122 seconds.
19:3222 seconds.
19:3322 seconds.
19:3422 seconds.
19:3522 seconds.
19:3622 seconds.
19:3722 seconds.
19:3822 seconds.
19:39How long now?
19:40Or a penis second.
19:43Oh, ho, ho.
19:44Thank you for that, Tom.
19:46Another day of living my dream.
19:48What did you use to make that crackle noise?
19:49An egg I found in the bin.
19:50Just the shell.
19:51It was a very satisfying sound.
19:52Yeah.
19:53It felt...
19:54Did you see my face?
19:55I was like...
19:56Oh!
19:57Were you going to take an axe to that?
19:58Yeah, but they kept banning me from using the axe.
19:59Danielle's plan was to use the axe to pop the exercise ball.
20:05Yeah, because you'd suspect it would whack, wouldn't you?
20:19Mm-hm.
20:20Okay.
20:21Who's next?
20:22Whether or not she can pop, she lives in a bubble, it's Julia Morris.
20:25Snap something, crackle something.
20:27Crackle for something, pop something.
20:30Want that?
20:30Is that a pop?
20:31Tick the pop.
20:33Okay, so I feel like we've got our...
20:35How buried?
20:35Oh my god.
20:36There's your snap.
20:38But are you ready for your crackle?
20:51Thanks, Julia.
20:57So you lit the rice bubbles.
21:03The way that you just did that straight away made me feel like you've done that before.
21:08No, but I love that stick lighter because you can light things from a distance.
21:12Should we worry about you in the summer months?
21:15No.
21:16You'll never find me.
21:17I'm all in battle fatigue.
21:19I've got to tell you about flamethrowers, Julia.
21:22Oh, yes.
21:24Methane.
21:24Can I swap spots?
21:27Can I check that man?
21:29I must say the snap was great.
21:30Do you snap at home?
21:31Not anymore, sir, because I'm no longer married.
21:33Oh, okay.
21:35Oh, so your marriage snapped.
21:37Ha-ha!
21:43Yeah, so it was a great snap, but I thought the pop was a bit shit.
21:46You just kind of threw that one away.
21:47I just wanted to get out of there.
21:48I wanted to go home early.
21:49Okay, keep the snaps, crackles, etc. coming.
21:52I don't know if he can snap, crackle and pop, but he sure can yap, cackle and prop.
21:57It's Jimmy Reese.
21:58I'm thinking maybe I could snap a frame with the taskmaster in it or something.
22:04Whoa.
22:04I think I'm going to...
22:07I could have done it that way, but I think sitting on his face might be a bit more satisfying.
22:15Here we go.
22:16This is the crackle sound.
22:18B.
22:27Pop.
22:28Uh-oh.
22:28A sudden, short, explosive sound.
22:31Let's try and put a balloon inside a balloon and have a double pop.
22:34I've double walled it.
22:59Count me down!
23:0517, 16, 15, 14, 13, 12.
23:10Ow!
23:15We're out!
23:17We're out!
23:22Oh.
23:24I'm feeling satisfied.
23:25Talk me through the double balloon.
23:27I just thought if I kept blowing it up, it would be harder with two.
23:30You said that sitting on my face would be more satisfying.
23:33It was a great snap, but it's not supposed to be satisfying for you.
23:36It's supposed to be satisfying for the listener.
23:38If I did it the other way around, I would...
23:40Your feet would be going up my arse.
23:42Which I feel like is what's happening all the time on this show.
23:47Okay.
23:48All right, who's up?
23:49What's been impressive about all these attempts so far
23:52is the sounds they get on their first attempt, as per the rules.
23:55Just thought I'd bring that up for no reason.
23:57Anyway, we have one more contestant.
23:59Nina Oyama.
24:02I think, like, snapping a twig will be a good vibe.
24:06It's really helpful to read the envelope.
24:10Okay, ready?
24:11Oh, that sucked.
24:15Oh, that was...
24:16Can I do a second snap?
24:19All the information you need is in the task.
24:22Okay.
24:23I'm going for another twig.
24:24I'm going for another...
24:24I'm going to get a lot of twigs.
24:26Hang on, let me do this one again.
24:31Oh!
24:32Oh!
24:34That's a snap!
24:37Oh, snap!
24:38Oh, that has, like, a crackly kind of sound.
24:40Okay, are you ready?
24:44You know what?
24:45I'm just going to shell this.
24:46This is, like, part of the B squad of sounds.
24:49This is crackle time.
24:50Ready?
24:54Now that's a crackle.
24:56That is...
24:57Can I do that thing?
24:59It's just not very satisfying.
25:01It's like a weak dog pop.
25:02Like, it's not good enough.
25:05Okay, what about this?
25:09Oh!
25:09I mean...
25:11I'm going to do it again.
25:16I think...
25:16Yeah, that's a great A pop.
25:19Beautiful.
25:20Okay.
25:21Thanks, David.
25:22You carried the task around with you the whole time.
25:35You did, and at one point, you literally said,
25:37it's really helpful to read the envelope.
25:40You've just got to trust me.
25:41Like, the ones that I got to were, like, really, really good.
25:44Like, they were, like, so good.
25:47I mean, you were there.
25:49Like, how good were they?
25:50They were so good.
25:53But I get to have the first one?
25:55Yeah, they count.
25:55Oh, cool.
25:56The ones you said were shit.
26:00Okay, well, it's pretty clear the scoring for me.
26:02I think Luke's on one.
26:04Despite not having second attempts that didn't count,
26:06like Nina did, Nina, you're on two.
26:08I really like Julia's snap, but the pot was thrown away,
26:11so you're on three points.
26:12Thank you.
26:13Danielle got a really good reaction from the crowd,
26:15but Jimmy got the best with five.
26:17Very satisfying sound from Jimmy.
26:19Here's one for the Spreadheads.
26:35Hello, Tom.
26:36Hi, Luke.
26:37Oh.
26:39Oh, what is that?
26:41Is this Vegemite?
26:43It's generic yeast spread.
26:45Sorry.
26:45That sounds so much worse.
26:56Have the task isn't to open the jar.
26:58Thoroughly spread this generic yeast spread
27:02on the best thing.
27:05You have 12 minutes.
27:07Your time starts now.
27:09I mean...
27:11So, not much to this one.
27:17Our contestants need to choose the best thing.
27:19The retreat contains many things, thousands of things,
27:2118,000 things in total.
27:23Would you like to know what some of them are?
27:24Play one of the clips, I reckon.
27:26Right away.
27:27It's Nina and Danielle.
27:29If he's the judge...
27:31I think I'm going to go with this world map.
27:43Maybe if the whole world was covered in generic yeast spread,
27:47we'd all have one problem that we could unite against.
27:50Like an Independence Day.
27:51Yeah, the threat of genetic yeast spread.
27:54Generic yeast.
27:56Generic yeast!
27:58Calm down, please.
27:59A big smile for him.
28:00He's very happy about the fact he's the best thing.
28:03I just need to throw a suit on him.
28:05The rotation stops working once you cover it in generic meat spread.
28:11Yeast.
28:11Yeah.
28:12See the likeness there?
28:14Yeah.
28:15Ta-da!
28:19He's thoroughly spread on that.
28:22Uh-oh.
28:26Oh.
28:28Completely clean the generic yeast spread of your best thing.
28:33Fastest wind, your time starts now.
28:34Okay, kitchen.
28:37I thought the paper would really smear,
28:40but it's actually quite durable.
28:42Okay, great, great, great.
28:43And that's done, right?
28:45Beautiful, look at that.
28:47Oh, this is actually pretty funny.
28:50Oh, I'm going to fully throw up.
28:52This looks so foul.
28:53It's making me feel ill.
28:55Mm.
28:58Are you okay?
29:00It's just the worst thing I've ever seen in my life.
29:03I don't think I was the worst.
29:04The best?
29:06Only time will tell.
29:07It's like Moses in the reeds.
29:11And that's cleaned.
29:12That's completely clean?
29:13Yeah.
29:14Smashed it.
29:15How do you think it went compared to the other tasks at this lake?
29:18Oh, bad.
29:19I think I'm like a lake guy, so it's...
29:21Yeah.
29:21Yeah.
29:25Okay, bye!
29:25Yeah, did you see the bowling ball still floating there?
29:36But hey, at least you know where all that E. coli came from.
29:41So, Danielle, Nina, how did you feel about my little double task for you there?
29:45Well, mine, it came off pretty fast.
29:47I was pretty chuffed with it, to be honest.
29:49I feel good about it.
29:51What about you, Nina?
29:51Having to see it all come off in the bathtub, it looked like someone had had diarrhoea in
29:57the bath.
29:57Like, I cannot stress enough how much it looked like actual shit, and of, like, various sites,
30:03like some of their big logs.
30:04Stop describing it.
30:05It's really hard to clean non-specified genetic...
30:09Oh!
30:11Generic yeast inf...
30:13Spread.
30:13Spread.
30:13Sorry.
30:16Generic yeast spread.
30:17So, how'd they do?
30:18All right, so Nina cleaned planet Earth in 11 minutes and 8 seconds.
30:22Better than all those companies out there.
30:24Hey!
30:24I would hate to be a corporation right now.
30:32Danielle cleaned Tom Gleeson in a brisk 2 minutes and 21 seconds.
30:39More spreading, please, Tom.
30:41Forget Vegemite toast for breakfast.
30:43This guy is really salty in the mornings.
30:45It's Luke McGregor.
30:47I kind of want to stick my arm in it to see how it feels.
30:50I've got to do it for science.
30:52I've never had a jar this big before.
30:53Mm.
30:54How does it feel?
31:00It doesn't feel good.
31:02Um, OK.
31:05Oh!
31:07I've got an idea.
31:11All right, close your eyes for a second.
31:13OK.
31:13OK.
31:14Open your eyes.
31:16Guess which one is my real hand.
31:20Tom?
31:22Guess which one's my real hand.
31:24My right?
31:27Your left.
31:28Yeah.
31:28Yeah, your right.
31:29Do you want to try it?
31:35Close your eyes.
31:36Close your eyes?
31:37Yep.
31:37Open your eyes.
31:38Oh, they're so similar.
31:42You're left.
31:43You actually got me.
31:48How much time we got left?
31:5043 seconds.
31:50Oh, OK.
31:51Now, you know that scene in Predator?
31:53Get a big old globule.
31:54Mm-hmm.
31:55Dylan, you son of a bitch.
31:58That actually wasn't that bad.
32:00Oh!
32:00All right.
32:02Oh, no!
32:04Don't be clean it off.
32:05Don't be clean it off.
32:07Completely clean the generic you spread off to your best scene.
32:09Fastest wins.
32:12OK, with what?
32:14This is not working.
32:15Doesn't really come off, does it?
32:16No.
32:17Oh.
32:18Go back out there for a second.
32:19All right.
32:20One more game.
32:20You might have to squint for this one, like, blur your eyes a little.
32:23You squinting?
32:24I'm really squinting.
32:25Don't shake him.
32:26Your hand is on the left.
32:29My left.
32:30Yes.
32:30I don't know if you squint.
32:31I don't think you squinted.
32:32I was squinting.
32:34This is clean?
32:36Yeah, that's how it was before.
32:37I had a bathroom accident.
32:38That was before the game, so yeah.
32:41So that's human feces?
32:42That's human feces, yeah.
32:43That's your...
32:44I'd prefer to make a deal of it, because I'm already embarrassed by it.
32:47And you're comfortable with that just being there?
32:49I'll wash it up separately to the task.
32:50I just don't want to waste time getting penalised for what was clearly just an accident.
32:54in the toilet.
33:02So at the beginning of the show, you were prepared to say that you wet yourself to avoid saying
33:06that you got splashed, and now you're prepared to say that you had...
33:09Like a poo all up my forearm?
33:11Yeah.
33:11It was just unfortunate.
33:12On the same day we were dealing with Vegemite, I happened to get poo all up my arm.
33:17The luck.
33:18You know what I was really excited about?
33:19You created a task within the task.
33:21Yeah, I kind of forgot what the task was halfway through and...
33:24I could tell, but I don't care, because you created entertainment.
33:27You created a whole other task, and that was, guess which hand is mine?
33:31It was very entertaining.
33:34Thank you.
33:35It was great viewing.
33:36Yeah, Tom and I are going to take it on the road next year.
33:40You know what the best thing is?
33:41You invented a task within the task, and then you lost at that task.
33:47I feel like it might have affected the result.
33:49How did he do?
33:50Well, if we accept that the rest of that stuff on his arm was feces, his time was 7 minutes
33:56and 33 seconds.
33:58Okay, still quite a while there.
34:00Anyone left?
34:00I hope you like National Youth Radio Broadcasters, because we're about to tune in to the Jays.
34:05It's Jimmy and Julia.
34:06I'm pretty sure I have said to you, Tom, that you are the best thing about this show.
34:11Oh, okay.
34:11Better than...
34:13Right.
34:14Voldemort.
34:15Do you mind just laying down on this table?
34:17Okay.
34:20All right, you want it.
34:22You got it.
34:23It's like a day spa.
34:25Give you a little head massage.
34:26Oh, that's quite nice.
34:27That's quite nice.
34:27And this is like the oil.
34:30People don't always treat you like you're the best thing, don't you reckon?
34:34So this is self-love, is it?
34:35Yeah, yeah, yeah.
34:37Oh, there we go.
34:39Look at that.
34:43It's quite dense.
34:45Some people eat it this way, you know?
34:47Listen to this.
34:50Some websites love that.
34:52Okay.
34:53Oh!
34:58I don't want to touch your, you know, your...
35:01Oh, right, that's appreciated.
35:03Do you mind if I just drop a bit on there?
35:04I'll just put a little...
35:06There we go.
35:06Just a little bit on there.
35:08That's nice.
35:08I just thought if anyone was feeling a little bit hungry...
35:12Oh!
35:16This is the next task.
35:18You are a cheeky piece, Tom.
35:22I hope the next task is a shower.
35:25High five.
35:27Oh, dear.
35:28Thanks, mate.
35:32Okay, stand by.
35:34Okay.
35:34All right, honey bear.
35:35Okay, so we're going to get that off.
35:37Okay.
35:37Just be careful.
35:38We don't want to get it anywhere, okay?
35:40It's quite thoroughly on here, isn't it?
35:44Are you clean?
35:45Well, you'd be the judge.
35:46I'm going to have to trust you to some degree.
35:49There we go, Jimmy.
35:50Thanks, mate.
35:50Okay.
35:51I'll just pop off to the dry cleaners.
36:00Wow, I don't think the show's going to get much hornier than that.
36:04There was a lot going on there.
36:06Like, why I would take my clothes off on television?
36:09Honestly, that's going to tell you how bad my mental health is.
36:14Can you explain putting the bread on your leg?
36:16I don't think that was part of...
36:18Because you had to cover something.
36:19I don't even know where the bread came.
36:20from.
36:21I remember none of that.
36:23You asked me to get it for you from the kitchen.
36:25Did I?
36:26High-level trauma.
36:28So you lose a lot of stuff.
36:30Okay, so, Jimmy, I think we got it back from the dry cleaner, didn't we?
36:34Okay, let's have a look.
36:35Look at that.
36:36Look at how clean that is.
36:39Why don't you have a look at it, Jimmy?
36:41Just see if it's up to your standards.
36:43Yeah, it's...
36:45It smells clean.
36:48What does it smell like?
36:49It smells like...
36:50I think it smells like Luke's arm.
36:56I feel like that might affect the results.
36:58Well, hang on.
36:58It was on a smell test, though, was it?
37:00Did everyone smell Danielle's picture of you?
37:03Did you smell Luke's arm?
37:04because that obviously would have stunk.
37:06No, no, no.
37:06To be fair.
37:14I'm just saying.
37:15Julia, are you setting me a task within the task?
37:20Would you like to know the time?
37:21Yeah, how'd they go?
37:22So Julia had a shower and dried herself and came back in six minutes, 32 seconds.
37:27Okay.
37:30My suit was returned from the dry cleaners four days, 16 hours and 27 minutes.
37:36Pretty good, though.
37:37It's pretty clean.
37:37So obviously Jimmy is on one, we have Nina on two, Luke on three, Julia on four and the winner
37:42of the task is Danielle with five points.
37:44Yeah!
37:44Woo!
37:45Woo!
37:45And how has that task spread our cast across the overall scores?
37:52The current winner is Julia with 16 points.
37:55Woo!
37:55Woo!
37:56Woo!
37:56Woo!
37:57Woo!
37:57Okay, that's all very well and good, but it's far from over.
38:01So you lot up on the stage for the live task!
38:04Woo!
38:05Woo!
38:06Woo!
38:06Woo!
38:07Woo!
38:07Woo!
38:08Woo!
38:08Woo!
38:09Woo!
38:09Tonight's live task will be performed in teams.
38:12Woo!
38:12Luke, could you please read the task?
38:14In your teams, recreate famous scenes from history for the taskmaster.
38:20Once the taskmaster has correctly guessed your famous scene, you may recreate another.
38:24You may only speak in four-letter words.
38:27Most scenes correctly guessed in 150 seconds wins.
38:29Correct.
38:30The team of two will be going first.
38:32Ever going to be ready.
38:33Oh!
38:34Oh!
38:35Oh!
38:35Oh!
38:36Oh!
38:37Grass.
38:38Grass has five letters.
38:39Grass.
38:40Okay.
38:41Go.
38:42Okay.
38:43Okay.
38:44Boom!
38:45Boom!
38:46Boom!
38:47Boom!
38:48Boom!
38:49Boom!
38:50Boom!
38:51JFK assassination.
38:52Correct.
38:53Oh, gosh.
38:54Iron.
38:55Head.
38:56Boom!
38:57Boom!
38:58Boom!
38:59Boom!
39:00Boom!
39:00Boom!
39:01Boom!
39:01Boom!
39:02Boom!
39:03Boom!
39:04Boom!
39:05I'm thinking it's something to do with Ned Kelly, perhaps?
39:07Correct.
39:082,000.
39:09Oh!
39:10Oh!
39:11I have...
39:15Bugs.
39:16Bugs.
39:17Bugs.
39:18Hap.
39:19Newy.
39:20Year.
39:21Bugs!
39:22Yeah!
39:23Hap.
39:25Newy.
39:26Year.
39:27Oh, are you doing a Y2K?
39:28Yes!
39:29Correct.
39:30You're a genius.
39:32Please move to the chair.
39:34Oh, okay.
39:35Oh, God.
39:36The other team.
39:45Rats!
39:46Sick!
39:47Rats!
39:48Sick!
39:49Sick from me!
39:50Rats!
39:51Rats!
39:52Oh, like this.
39:53Correct?
39:54Yes!
39:55Um...
39:56Um...
39:57Um...
39:58Um...
39:59Fire!
40:00Lava!
40:01Fire!
40:02It's freezing for...
40:04Mama!
40:06Pompeii.
40:08Crack!
40:09Crack!
40:10Whoa!
40:11Whoa!
40:12Whoa!
40:13Whoa!
40:14Whoa!
40:15Whoa!
40:16Follow the Berlin Wall.
40:17Crack.
40:18Very good.
40:19Bam!
40:20Bam!
40:21Bam!
40:22Oh!
40:23Bam!
40:24Bam!
40:25Bam!
40:26Bam!
40:27Bam!
40:28Same!
40:29Same!
40:30Same!
40:31Nine!
40:32Two!
40:33Oh.
40:34Song!
40:35Oh, Dolly...
40:36Dolly Parton?
40:37No!
40:38Oh, Dolly the Sheep!
40:39Dolly the Sheep!
40:40Correct.
40:41Cash!
40:42Cash!
40:43Cash!
40:44Cash!
40:45Ah!
40:46No cash!
40:47No cash!
40:48GFC Crash, correct?
40:49He got it!
40:50Tom Cashman, some stats and figures from our live task please.
40:59Well, our team of two got three of the scenes correct.
41:04However, they said the word grass as the very first word of one of them.
41:08Yeah!
41:09But only one S.
41:10I was using the umlaut above the A to give it its gravitas.
41:14Grass, you convinced me, I think it's fine.
41:17Okay, so they're on three and then team two got five.
41:21Amazing!
41:22Very impressive.
41:23Alright, this means we have a winner, but let's hold you in suspense one moment longer.
41:29What is our series scoreboard looking like, Tom?
41:31Our current season winner so far, Danielle with 66 points!
41:37Tonight's episode ends with Jimmy and Julia with 19 points.
41:45We've got another tiebreaker!
41:48Alright!
41:49What's the tiebreak?
41:50What's the tiebreak?
41:51We'll be watching Jimmy and Julia attempt to honk a car horn the quietest.
41:59Just quiet, making it quiet.
42:01Where does the honk come from?
42:03I'm assuming this is the horn we're talking about, babes.
42:0535 seconds.
42:06Don't, why are you putting it under there for?
42:0824 seconds.
42:10Put your thing...
42:15Thanks, Jimmy.
42:16Can I just say, in my own life...
42:21That's what would have happened.
42:24Who had the quietest horn?
42:25By five decibels...
42:28Jimmy Rees had the quietest horn!
42:34Five things found on five walks in various urban, suburban and semi-rural areas of eastern Australia are yours to enjoy.
42:40Tonight we learnt that bowling balls can be annoyingly buoyant.
42:48And we also learnt that Tom Cashman better hope this show gets another season as he makes a terrible sound operator.
42:55Most importantly, however, we learnt our episode four winner is Jimmy!
43:00We'll see you next week with more Taskmaster!
43:032 facts
43:215
43:24One
43:256
43:286
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