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00:00and then chin slammed them to the ground that's the fighting is now moved to the back of the
00:11stalls the referee is quite happy to allow it to continue a man is just trying to get back to
00:19his seat with his point the referee quite happy to continue the fight is happening on two flanks
00:26down either side meanwhile Rishi and Bullitt are just watching and laughing well they're headed this
00:34way Max has taken one right to the plums oh it's a headbutt he's nearly fallen on an old lady
00:41not old respect I've just seen you under the lights shout Asians again
00:50oh they're right at the front of the stage now so they're coming back to join us
00:59oh my goodness look at Ivan beating him they're energized the announcement of SNL UK has revived
01:18sketch comedians some real close-up shots of car and a while there for the wiki feet crowd
01:32hey those flag protests are legitimate expressions of democratic intent there's a lot of villains in
01:56this ring yeah it's a bit of a mess looks like a goddamn reform party conference three angry white
02:03guys and one Asian guy and you're like you know what you've signed up for
02:06the crowd are asking them to kiss no demanding of a kiss
02:19the crowd are asking them to kiss no demanding of a kiss
02:19the crowd are asking them to kiss no demanding of a kiss
02:23kiss them oh well it's like it's heartbreaking
02:26rejection is hard at the best of times
02:29it's good for the young people in the crowd to see that sometimes heartbreak is a part of life
02:33not usually part of a wrestling match
02:36oh
02:38look at that
02:45double kick
02:48code red
02:50code red
02:51and the kick out
02:51that was astonishing
02:56a double reverse 69
02:59okay let's watch that
03:01so it's like this is the classic max and iban code red with the three count and the elimination great work from me
03:07amazing
03:08and you'd love to see a double 69 in wrestling
03:12richie's taken one right to the onion bargees
03:20now they're giving each other a single gate
03:24bullet pushing max off the top rope
03:26okay so ivan's alone
03:28the referee is saying stuff like come on none of that
03:31this man has lost control
03:32yes
03:34oh yeah
03:36oh yeah
03:37oh yeah
03:39they're lining up a double cloak
03:40oh
03:41ivan in real trouble here
03:43oh my god
03:44there's a cover
03:44one
03:45two
03:46and an elimination
03:48oh a double elimination
03:50heart-breakingly the ogs have been eliminated
03:57oh
03:57and his team got eliminated
04:01and that means the two representatives of gamblers anonymous
04:04he's still in the world but hang on
04:07who's this gonna be
04:11no one is coming out to face this
04:12oh
04:13no no no no
04:15sometimes the countdown leads to nothing
04:16can we check this go
04:17wait wait wait wait hang on a second
04:19i'm getting something you read it
04:20it's time for the rose buds to compete
04:22or is it dr k what's the prognosis
04:25well matthew after six or seven extremely strong
04:28painkillers i can confirm i'm feeling absolutely amazing
04:34but uh yeah rosie won't be wrestling
04:36no
04:38good grief this couldn't possibly get any worse
04:40matthew rose mattisleo's been knocked out
04:43i found her surrounded with poker chips
04:46what in the name of reportage
04:50this is a dark day for justice but such is the lot of the newsman
04:54we simply report on the horrible things we see
04:57hold on matthew there comes a time where journalistic impartiality must take a back seat
05:02i was going to compete at a halftime game at my local roller derby but i think i have to be
05:07in that ring
05:09not without me
05:11hell yeah wait why don't i make that
05:13i pray a lot no further questions well there's only one thing left to ask see joe
05:18yes can we wrestle only if you can solve these 12 riddles i'm joking i've had a wine you can you must
05:28breaking news it's on
05:38entering the ring
05:40it is the team of olga rock hard
05:42and matthew the pacifist crosby
05:46give it up for your roving reporters
05:52so
06:00journalistic impartiality is dead
06:04also it's really good that others get to use that nickname
06:08in a sort of appropriate context
06:13here they come
06:13but when they get there they've got bullet and the prince of mumbai this is absolutely
06:21poised folks have they not been watching what's been happening yeah someone questioned why the
06:26hell they're bothering
06:29cock is entering the ring with absolute swagger
06:34yeah
06:36oh
06:37trust me
06:38oh well bullet has inadvertently knocked
06:40um
06:43bullets attack rishi oh my god this is unbelievable
06:46rishi's hurt himself
06:48this is the thing the bigger they are the harder they fall
07:00they celebrated a little too early
07:03oh my goodness
07:05oh god
07:07oh no
07:12oh and the kick out
07:13this is unprecedented
07:15oh
07:16crafty cop man with the reversal the journalists have got involved
07:20she's spinning around like kylie minogue
07:23this is basically like jenny bond doing the coronation herself
07:30uh-oh
07:30uh-oh
07:36it's horrible to watch
07:39breakfast doesn't look good from any angle
07:41basically that one given what's going on in the last few years we don't need to see another
07:45russian journalist in trouble
07:49crosby staggering to his feet
07:51what's this this is this is this is this bag of your stuff mish
07:53oh yeah brisky appears to have a bag of oh
07:56crosby's gone on top of bullets
07:57has this saved the day
07:58rishi's
08:00what's this
08:01rishi's got a bag of the old croydon
08:05calamity oh my god
08:07bullet looking like a 1980s wall street employee
08:10she's gone to the top rope
08:15okay
08:20shaky shaky plum shot
08:24crosby a human mullet business on the top party on the bottom
08:27oh okay
08:30bullet's grabbed
08:31oh yeah
08:32he's with the dust in his eyes
08:33she's gripping on her
08:34he's caught the cock
08:35okay crosby
08:36infecting the columbian model
08:38so clean
08:39oh and that is holding both of their team
08:44now i have definitely read greg davies slash fiction that looks like this
08:48oh it's a double crossbody
08:50they're up to me
08:51oh it's a great oh
08:53it's unbelievable
08:54eliminating the journalists have won
08:57give it up
08:58unbelievable
08:59for your most unlikely of winners
09:01free press
09:02he's doing it
09:03oh the rock hard cock
09:04and matthew the pacifist crosby
09:08the double crossbody does it
09:11for the roving reporters what a victory in the tag team tornado
09:15feeling what a twist for the ages
09:21matthew you've spent the whole evening preaching pacifism
09:25you've just beaten up half the industry
09:28how do you feel cancelled
09:33but guys breaking news
09:37i definitely have a yeast infection
09:42that makes two of us
09:46reportage
09:47anything else you want to say to the teams you've flattened on your way to victory tonight
09:51fuck them
09:55give it up one more time for the winners of the tag team tornado
09:58all the pork and matthew crosby
10:05commentary team it's been absolutely epic take us through let's look at the winning moment again
10:09double crossbody slam and then the double pin
10:23how was any of it legal people were kicking each other putting their hands up each other's bums
10:28people were upside down at points this is all it is it it's it's it's it's pure filth only one of
10:34one of them was dressed appropriately for the occasion max fosh looked superb
10:39my personal highlight was a van being dangled off the dress circle of the apollo
10:44that was a moment that he did not look like he was fully prepared for
10:48i've seen a lot of wrestling in my time and i've never seen uh wrestlers just submit and just go
10:52now i've really enjoyed amy gledhill and harriet kemzy i thought was the highlight of the massive respect
11:00sometimes no wrestling needed in wrestling sometimes my best moment actually was maizey
11:04adam doing the old on all fours person walks back not oh you've had a shocker
11:16but at least they're getting beer it's dry it's dry backstage we've been told that we're not allowed
11:20to have alcohol for health and safety however and we were told to keep it tight and you started a
11:24chant about golden i didn't start a chant these no offense cunt started that
11:31they've outlawed alcohol on stage but they can't stop me taking my precious heroin thank you
11:40we have to move swiftly on from this i'm afraid i did take some questions from the audience via
11:43instagram dm but i'm afraid to say it's it's it's slim pickings
11:46greg james you've been asked by someone called annie if this is a step up or a step down from
11:51interviewing taylor swift again i remain impartial it's just a step
12:04who would win in a fight between sarah nish and greg this is a very delicate question
12:09100 100 100 percent pascal 100 percent pascal i think it's i think it's pascal
12:16it's true it's true thank you who's gonna win in a fight out of captain impartial the gold
12:24labubu and a woman with violence in her eyes yeah the three of us had very different childhoods
12:31it's muscle memory
12:32that's your wrestling name muscle memory coming up two comedians one grudge zero chill
12:42ed gamble and phil wang are about to settle their score the only way they know how in the ring
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