Unlocked Family Secrets Season 1 Episode 2

Reality Realm US

Unlocked Family Secrets Season 1 Episode 2  #RealityRealmUS Reality Realm US

Transcript

00:00I had an idyllic childhood, a loving family,

00:06and beautiful memories.

00:08But for most of my life, I've been focused

00:12on finding out where I came from.

00:14I had no idea my search would uncover a horrific family

00:19secret.

00:21I remember my mother said to me, just be careful

00:25and make sure that you're ready for what you might find.

00:30It felt like a world collapsing.

00:32That day would change my life forever.

00:36Your past sometimes will catch up with you.

00:39That storm is coming.

00:41It was just overwhelming.

00:43Then I just blacked out.

00:55I'm a firm believer in things happen

01:00when they're supposed to happen, how they're supposed

01:02to happen, whether you understand it or not.

01:07I definitely was raised by a mother who

01:09was strong and resilient.

01:11But we didn't really know that she was sick.

01:15Between March and May of 2017, it just went really fast.

01:21And then she passed away.

01:25With my grandmother passing, I know my mom felt a void,

01:31like something was missing at that time.

01:35There was a secret of her origin.

01:40For me, the goal became finding out where I came from.

01:45But I remember my mother said to me, be careful and make sure

01:50that you're ready for what you might find.

01:55All right, guys, let's hurry, hurry, hurry.

02:08Let's go.

02:08While we're standing there, we got a backpack.

02:10Let's get it in a locker.

02:12I am an assistant principal at a public high school

02:17in the south suburbs of Chicago.

02:19I started teaching 34 years ago.

02:23I was one of the first African-American teachers

02:27certified in the building.

02:29All right, here come my crew.

02:31Good morning.

02:32Can you hurry up?

02:33The bell already rang.

02:35As a teacher, I've always kind of gravitated

02:38toward what we call the at-risk students,

02:40because I understand very clearly struggling with challenges.

02:48My trauma stems from the hidden history within my family,

02:53secrets from before I was ever born.

02:59I was born in August of 1966.

03:01I came home with my parents December 6th.

03:08There were pictures of me when my dad's holding me

03:11at Christmas time.

03:15I was raised in a good home.

03:18I remember my grandfather had a farm.

03:20We had a pony that my grandfather had for us

03:24when we would come visit in the summer.

03:26And then I have this memory from around kindergarten,

03:33five years old.

03:34It was just, I don't know, like a little doctor's office.

03:38I was sitting someplace that I overheard a conversation

03:43where my mother said I was adopted.

03:49I knew what the word meant, but I didn't understand maybe fully

03:54how that, you know, was me.

03:59I remember asking my mom.

04:01So she explained it.

04:04Yes, you're adopted.

04:09And so I remember going to school and telling kids,

04:13I'm adopted.

04:14I'm adopted.

04:16One of my school girls on the playground, she said to me,

04:21well, that means your brother is not really your brother.

04:25And it was hurtful.

04:28You always want to know.

04:30You're always curious about who your parents are,

04:32where you come from.

04:37Much of my life has been centered around one question.

04:41Who is my birth mother?

04:44I was in junior high, maybe 10, 11 years old.

04:47I would snoop.

04:48My mother would have drawers that she'd keep things in.

04:52I found my birth certificate.

04:55And at that time, you could not access your original birth

04:59certificate that was issued at birth.

05:02So the only name that's on that birth certificate would be

05:05your adoptive parent's name.

05:07Even the hospital was not there.

05:11So I thought maybe I could find out what hospital I was born in.

05:18I began dialing into hospitals and asking them if they could

05:23tell me how many baby girls were born on my birth date.

05:28And there were so many people born the same day as me.

05:33Like, I think I just realized how futile that was.

05:40I remember thinking, if my birth mother gave me up for adoption,

05:44then maybe there was a reason why.

05:47And maybe this isn't going to be this fairy tale ending.

05:51And it was like, pump the brakes.

05:55Over the next 25 years, life happened.

05:58I got married, had my kids, Cameron and Colin.

06:02Still, I never gave up on my mission to uncover the truth

06:07about my birth mother.

06:09Nobody's eating my vegetable, that my salad.

06:16This is a beautiful salad.

06:17Look at my salad.

06:18Today is our cheat day.

06:19Um, I think it is interesting to reflect

06:27on where we started and then where we are now.

06:30My dad said, Jen, she's adopted too.

06:36And having this cousin who was also adopted,

06:40there was a sameness there.

06:42I appreciated that.

06:44And that set the seeds for what was to come.

06:48Like, you were a tutor, Jennifer.

06:50Like, you prepared me for the inevitable,

06:54and you set it off.

06:56Well, you know, I feel honored that you trusted me.

07:00So in 2011, adoptees in Illinois could request

07:04their original birth certificate.

07:05So I got my original birth certificate in 2012.

07:09So I think I got mine January, February 2012.

07:13From there, it was just, we were in it.

07:20After 30 years, I finally got it.

07:24My original, unredacted birth certificate.

07:29It had where my birth mother was living at the time.

07:33And it had her name, like, oh, we have it.

07:37Oh, my God.

07:38Like, that's her name, Deborah.

07:43And the name that I was born with was Kelly Ann.

07:46My mother's age was there.

07:49She was young.

07:50She was 15.

07:51The father was not listed.

07:53Once I was able to see my birth mother's name,

07:58then it was like, okay,

08:00now I have some place to go with this.

08:03I remember being in the room, like in her room.

08:08When she had opened it, there was excitement.

08:11And like, this is the first step to kind of getting,

08:14you know, some more information.

08:18So the very first thing was if my birth mother was born in Harvey,

08:24what high school would she have gone to in 1966?

08:31There were two.

08:32One of the high schools at the time was predominantly white.

08:36So I'm like, nope, that's not going to be it.

08:39Then another high school, that's where I hit.

08:46I remember touching the yearbook and just thinking,

08:50this person is real.

08:54This name, now I can put a face to it.

09:04I got her transcript.

09:06That was the golden ticket.

09:09It had Debra's address at the time,

09:11her parents' names,

09:13what both parents did for a living.

09:16I was excited to have the information

09:20and excited to share it with my mother.

09:23But I held off picking up the phone and calling her

09:27because by now we found out that my mother had cancer.

09:32In May of 2017, my grandma passed away.

09:44We were all very sad, devastated.

09:49Having lost my mother,

09:51now to go look for another mother,

09:54I felt guilty about that.

09:57And so I stopped.

10:06When you're grieving, you want to be surrounded by family.

10:10So when talking to my mom,

10:12I told her into the new year,

10:14we should probably start looking again

10:16for your birth mother.

10:17I found the service that would do background searches on people.

10:28So I put in my birth mother's name

10:31and it populates people who are associated with her.

10:36Ben Chambers, was he my sibling?

10:49Was he the person who could connect me to my birth mother?

10:59I can see all of the people that Ben follows on social media.

11:04People that also came up in the background search.

11:08These could be my sibling.

11:13We figure out that Ben goes to a church that's really nearby.

11:18I made a decision to go to the church.

11:22When I drove into the parking lot,

11:25I was like, oh my God, what do I do?

11:27I'm not sure I want to do it.

11:28I was like, okay, this is really happening.

11:36Get it together.

11:37It was a big moment for Lisa.

11:40Now or never, really.

11:43What, was I coming back the next weekend?

11:46No, we're going to do this today.

11:48The woman walks up to me and she says, are you Reverend Ben?

12:03Can we talk for a minute?

12:05And I say, hey, we can talk right here.

12:08The woman says, do you have a place that's a little more private?

12:12So this is like all the flags, but I feel like this nudge.

12:18Hey, you should sit down and talk with this lady.

12:22That's when I started thinking to myself,

12:25well, what if this is not what you think it is?

12:30What if this might get real?

12:33Are you ready for that?

12:35So I sit down, the lady sits down and she moves her chair closer.

12:41So I'm like, oh crap, like what's about to happen?

12:45I was nervous.

12:50And so she starts talking and she says, I think that you and I are related.

12:59I've got cousins I've never met before.

13:02So that didn't alarm me.

13:03What alarmed me was what she said next.

13:05She says, I believe that, that we are brother and sister.

13:14The search took 37 years and the fact that I was going to be introducing myself as a family member, I had to bring it.

13:24So I had the birth certificate.

13:28I had the yearbook photos.

13:30I had the transcripts.

13:32She's laying out all of this evidence.

13:35As we're talking and I'm giving him this information, I literally had it spread out on the table.

13:40And he was like, okay, okay, okay.

13:44In that moment, this woman started to look like my mom.

13:50I'm starting to recognize this woman's eyes and her cheekbones.

13:57And so I felt like this nudge is like, yes, she's telling the truth.

14:03So I don't know how long the pause was.

14:07Because it felt like a lifetime.

14:09And I'm sitting there like, okay, like what is happening?

14:14I wanted him to understand very clearly.

14:16I don't want anything from you.

14:18But I do want my birth mother to know that I'm fine.

14:22And then to me, it was just like this rush of emotion.

14:28Ben told me that in 2004, our birth mother had died of cancer.

14:39So I was never going to meet her.

14:43So we both were emotional.

14:48It was the rush of emotion of, at that time, not knowing the details about how Lisa came into existence.

14:58He says something like, well, let's exchange information.

15:01And I was like, okay.

15:07So I called my sister, Camille.

15:10I had no idea that the phone call that I received from Ben that day would change my life forever.

15:20The tone in his voice kind of startled me.

15:23I said, do you think it's possible that mom would have gave birth to a daughter in the 60s?

15:33And Camille was basically like, yes.

15:37I always knew that there was something that happened to my mom.

15:44Growing up, I was always with my mother and my grandmother.

15:52They would be in the living room talking and I would be upstairs.

15:59They would be talking in kind of cold.

16:03You know, they would say, well, you know, he, you know, did this or he would say this.

16:09And they would always say he or him.

16:13I remember the frustration that I felt from my mother and kind of like a dismissiveness from my grandmother.

16:21And then as a child, I really didn't put it together.

16:25But it seemed like that day, everything just started coming back.

16:30Finding out what really happened to my mom, it scared me.

16:41This is a lot.

16:42Like this is going to take a lot to unpack, a lot to figure out.

16:45So Camille, she starts immediately like Sherlock Holmes.

16:49I immediately called our uncle, my mother's brother, said, did my mother have a child at 15?

17:01And I felt like he was pushing me off.

17:06You know, why are you asking me this?

17:08He kind of paused and he said, you know, you should talk to your dad.

17:17I was on my way to church and my son called me.

17:21And he said, do you know a lady named Lisa?

17:24I said, no, I do not.

17:26And he said, well, this lady cornered me in church.

17:29She might be my sister.

17:31And mom is her mother.

17:34The other day, a minister of the church, he was talking about your past will sometimes catch up with you.

17:51And then it dawned on me, it came back just like daylight.

17:56That storm is coming.

17:59It was an awakening of what is to come.

18:04So the search is complete.

18:12Who has my birth story?

18:14That's what I was looking forward to at that point.

18:17You know, the things that my siblings could tell me about my birth mother.

18:23Ben said he was going to call me.

18:25So I think it was just this nervous anticipation, hoping that I would get the call.

18:32She felt a good vibe at first.

18:34But then it was kind of like, okay, now what?

18:37Now what's next?

18:38So then day number two.

18:40Now I'm beginning to feel like, hmm, we might have a problem here.

18:46She's telling me I haven't heard anything from them.

18:49I'm like, oh, they hate me.

18:51There is rejection.

18:52They're rejecting me.

18:53You know how your mind is going a thousand miles.

19:01Why all of a sudden did this woman show up since she finally found this?

19:07My dad is basically like, yes, this is true.

19:14Your mom did have a daughter.

19:15Gave the child up for adoption.

19:17Yes.

19:18It made me angry.

19:19It made me feel like, you know, why didn't anyone tell me?

19:25I had to come to grips with the fact that mom took this family secret to the grave.

19:35So that week, talking to my dad, talking to my siblings, at the time I was still the only point of contact for Lisa.

19:45So my call to Lisa was to say, hey, let's get together.

19:50And it just kind of snowballed from there.

19:54Every piece of information I learned about my birth mother, Deborah, was priceless.

20:00It was crazy to learn that she had grown up in Markham, Illinois, not far from where I had settled down and raised my own family.

20:10So from what I understand of the family history, Deborah's mother met her stepfather and they got married when Deborah was about three years old.

20:22Then Deborah's stepfather and her mother went on to have two more children.

20:28So Deborah and I, we were high school sweethearts.

20:33We attended Thornton Township High School, which is located in Harvey, Illinois.

20:38She was a great person to me.

20:41Very exciting to be around and cheer for most of the time.

20:45A friend of mine introduced us.

20:48I know that my mom initially was not that interested in him.

20:55But my dad writes a letter to my mom's mom, like, hey, please tell Deborah to reconsider.

21:01Like, I'm a really nice guy, like all these things.

21:04And obviously it worked.

21:08The summer of 1966, I went by there to her house one day and her mother told me she was visiting her grandmother.

21:20I thought maybe she'd be gone about a couple of weeks.

21:23Because it was really the entire summer that she was gone.

21:29And she didn't come back until school started again.

21:34And she wasn't the same.

21:36She wanted me to accompany her to Christ Temple Church.

21:48She wanted to go and talk to the minister there.

21:51So I stood outside until she finished.

21:54And then walking home, and she didn't talk about anything.

22:06After that, we both attended Thornton Community College.

22:12We were still dating, having fun.

22:16One day, I had went on and proposed to her.

22:20I said, what do you think about getting married?

22:22And she said, let me think about it.

22:26Some months passed, and Deborah asked me, have you ever wondered, really, was I at my grandmother's

22:38house during the summer that she wasn't there?

22:42I said, no, I just believed that you was at your grandmother's house.

22:46She said, after I tell you something, you may not want to marry me.

22:54She was very blunt.

22:56I am not a virgin.

22:58And she didn't get into who the person was.

23:04She just said that she had a child.

23:07But I had to give her up for adoption.

23:12I got quiet for a few minutes.

23:16And then I said, so, I said, I'm marrying you as you are.

23:30A lot went on in that house.

23:36I was sworn to keep my mouth shut.

23:40But after Lisa found this, the kids kept asking me and stuff.

23:45So finally, I told them exactly what happened to her.

23:52So my dad kind of filled in the blanks of what we were missing.

23:59Enough for the full weight of the story to kind of come down like, okay, this is pretty nasty.

24:06Like, this is pretty ugly.

24:07There is this euphoria when you are looking for something and you find it.

24:21But when you get an answer, you have more questions.

24:26Now the time had come to meet the rest of the Chambers family, my family, and find out why I had been given up for adoption.

24:36I arrived to the church.

24:38Camille and Ben were already there.

24:41And as soon as she walked through the door, I was like, oh, my God.

24:46Like, that is my mother walking through the door.

24:49Just like with Ben, I brought all of the artifacts that I had.

24:56When I saw that birth certificate and I said, this is for real, it was a goosebuck moment seeing that.

25:03I was super nervous.

25:05My face was hot.

25:06I felt like I was shaking.

25:09There was just this anxiety in the air immediately.

25:14And then transitioning to questions about what they knew and what they didn't know.

25:22I asked, well, do you know who my father is?

25:28I remember Camille did a lot of the talking.

25:31She's in this place where it's raw.

25:35You can't, like, just throw the truth on other people.

25:39But this secret needs to come out.

25:43And so I'm listening to Camille say, our mother's stepfather is your father.

25:55And she said, you know, the sexual assault, it happened as early as, you know, like seven or eight years old.

26:05And it was, you know, over the course of several years.

26:12Your biological father raped your biological mom.

26:16And this is how you were brought into this world.

26:23It was just like, it was, it was information overload.

26:31It was just so overwhelming.

26:34Then I just, I blacked out.

26:36It was just too much.

26:38I remember saying that I want to stop.

26:40I need to take a break.

26:44And then I started weeping.

26:48The weight of the circumstances surrounding Lisa's birth.

26:52It felt like a world collapsing.

26:55I felt pain projecting what she must have gone through.

27:02You know, thinking about the sexual abuse.

27:05Thinking about carrying a child that you, you know, maybe you didn't wish.

27:09At 15, you don't have a choice.

27:10She wasn't given a choice.

27:16I called our uncle because he was in the house.

27:19He's her sibling.

27:20He would know directly.

27:22I felt like he was squirming as I, as he was talking to me.

27:25Like, why are you asking me this?

27:31He, he just kept rejecting it.

27:36You know, and to have him just loft it off.

27:41And it's like, you're protecting your father.

27:44Who's not only a pedophile, a rapist, but you're protecting this.

27:49And I, and I couldn't understand that.

27:56At one point he did tell me my mother was not the first woman

28:01that his father stepped out on his mother with.

28:05I was just like, woman?

28:07You know, mom was a child.

28:10This was not like, you know, she was dating an older guy

28:15and she got pregnant as a teenager.

28:17This was her stepfather that had children with her mother.

28:26You know, we're talking about a, you know,

28:2950 plus year old secret.

28:32The reality is there, there are people

28:35who were very content with taking this to their grave.

28:39And that does not help the victim at all.

28:44It gives power to the victimizer.

28:47I just remember like, just really sitting at home

28:51and having a difficult time.

28:54And just realizing the age my daughters were at at that time

28:57that my mother at that age was being sexually abused,

29:02raped by, by an adult.

29:04I absolutely felt betrayed by my uncle.

29:10I would travel out to visit my uncle,

29:14stay in the house and we would go to church

29:16and we reminisce about mom and about granny.

29:19And this never came up.

29:21And you know, and then when it does,

29:23he's being this, you know, protector of his father.

29:27And it was just like, who are you?

29:31And what is really going on?

29:40I woke up that Sunday and now I know

29:43that I am a product of this sexual assault.

29:47And with that truth came this enormous pain to my siblings

29:54who didn't even know I existed.

29:57The reality of it hit me in such a way

30:01that I remember feeling like,

30:04maybe I should not have tried to find them.

30:07Because now they are carrying the weight of this truth

30:12about a sexual assault that happened to our mother.

30:15And I remember, I was weeping about that.

30:19It was like, so what do I symbolize?

30:22Am I the sister or am I now,

30:25you are this horrific thing that happened to our mother?

30:33It was a very, very heavy and dark couple of weeks

30:38to navigate and kind of deal with.

30:41You start to think about how,

30:43like how could this happen?

30:45How could this persist?

30:50After all this time,

30:51I'd been given this gift of discovering my birth mother

30:55only to learn about the trauma she went through

30:58to bring me into this world.

31:01To be this 15-year-old,

31:04you're pregnant with your stepfather's child.

31:07How is this possible?

31:09When we were dating,

31:11I remember Debra didn't want to go home at certain times

31:14and she didn't want to be there.

31:17So, you know, we would go out driving

31:19until almost the time

31:21when her mother would get home.

31:23because her mother military work nights.

31:28This when all this took place

31:31because she wasn't there.

31:32She was working nights

31:34and he had just total control over her.

31:39She was at age 15 years old or so.

31:45What could she do?

31:51When Debra told me that she had a child,

31:55one thing just led up to

31:57that it was her stepfather.

31:59That it was her stepfather.

32:03And then it dined on me.

32:04Okay.

32:05That's why he had a smirk on his face.

32:08Every time I was over there,

32:10you know, like,

32:11it was a laughter smirk.

32:18She went to her mother,

32:20but she said,

32:21I don't think my mother believed me at first.

32:25It was her word against his word.

32:29He, you know, he denied it.

32:35And then there's the pastor.

32:38Debra stopped going to the pastor for counseling

32:40because he said she must be enjoying doing it.

32:45Being with her stepfather.

32:48And she must because she came to him

32:50and not the police.

32:55In my mom's situation,

32:56I feel like there are multiple settings

33:00in which she was failed.

33:04From the home front to the church setting.

33:09The two places where my mom should have got hope, help.

33:14She got none of that.

33:15I can't imagine my mom being 15,

33:20navigating this.

33:27So at some point,

33:28I did speak to Debra's half-brother,

33:32who would be my uncle.

33:33He asked me,

33:37was I interested in meeting my birth father?

33:45And I said, no.

33:51When you kind of realize who your father is,

33:53how that came about was definitely a hard pill

33:56for all of us to swallow.

33:58And being a woman,

33:59you know, you kind of are heartbroken

34:02about just what Debra had to go through.

34:06It was even harder to deal with the fact that

34:09while my birth mother had suffered so much,

34:12my birth father,

34:14her abuser, was still alive.

34:17She died without ever seeing him brought to justice.

34:21We wanted to fight back for our mother

34:24because, you know,

34:25we're doing what she couldn't do.

34:27There's no statute of limitations.

34:29Why aren't we trying to press charges,

34:33get this guy arrested?

34:41Ben and I went on this journey.

34:44We went downtown

34:46and we searched records

34:48for if there was any court case,

34:51anything in the files.

34:54The only thing that we could find

34:56was our grandmother's divorce proceedings.

35:00It looked like it was brought up

35:02that the 15-year-old stepdaughter

35:04was pregnant

35:05and, you know,

35:06can we press charges?

35:07What can we do about this?

35:09And the court actually said,

35:12no, nothing.

35:16Because he was a family member,

35:19charges couldn't be pressed

35:20during the divorce proceedings.

35:24If we couldn't do it in court,

35:26I suggested that we make signs

35:29and go down to his house

35:31and get a bullhorn

35:32and say a pedophile lives here,

35:34a rapist lives here.

35:36I don't care how old he is.

35:39He's a pedophile.

35:40You were a pedophile then.

35:41You still are a pedophile.

35:43You are a rapist.

35:44And I just, you know,

35:47just had these thoughts of,

35:49you know,

35:50him looking and saying,

35:51who is this?

35:52And, you know,

35:53us being here and saying,

35:54we're Deborah's children.

35:56But I couldn't get anybody

35:58to do that with me.

36:00I came to this conclusion

36:02that, like,

36:03we're fighting for her

36:05and maybe that's not really

36:07what she wanted.

36:08Maybe what she wanted was

36:13us embracing Lisa

36:14and bringing Lisa in.

36:17I feel like that would have been something

36:19that mom would have done.

36:24It's painful to know

36:25that my birth mother, Deborah,

36:27died without ever seeing

36:29her children in reunion.

36:32But we are all committed

36:34to keeping our new family bond strong

36:36in her honor.

36:38Meant to be?

36:39Yeah.

36:40Right.

36:41Sometimes I call her daughter.

36:42I say,

36:43I'm going to start calling you daughter.

36:45And, uh, Deborah,

36:47she wanted to adopt her

36:49when she found her,

36:50bring her into the family.

36:52So I was committed to that.

37:00That picture of all of us.

37:02Oh, yeah.

37:03No, it's not in there.

37:04This is pre-Civil Rights era.

37:05All five of us.

37:07Yeah.

37:08You know what they say,

37:09things that are done in the dark

37:10always come to life.

37:11Right.

37:12The truth always surfaces.

37:13Yeah.

37:14I'm glad we can look at pictures

37:16and resemblances because,

37:18you know,

37:19Sunday after

37:21I talked to you guys,

37:24like,

37:25I felt guilty about,

37:27you know,

37:30bringing you this information

37:32that I was a sister

37:34that you didn't know about.

37:37Did you all ever have any regrets

37:39about,

37:40you know,

37:41the secret,

37:42so to speak, coming out?

37:44I'm glad that it was out.

37:46The secret was out.

37:47Yeah.

37:48You know.

37:49You are glad it's out?

37:50Yes.

37:51Because I, you know,

37:52after she had passed away,

37:53I was wondering,

37:54will we ever really meet you?

37:57Mm-hmm.

37:59And I'm glad

38:01that we was able to meet you.

38:03Mm-hmm.

38:04We talked about that a lot,

38:06like,

38:07as we were navigating the space,

38:08being able to verbalize that the,

38:10it's not,

38:11the issue is not with you.

38:12Mm-hmm.

38:13The issue is with everything else

38:15surrounding that.

38:16Good situation.

38:17Yeah.

38:18Yeah.

38:18The beauty that came out of meeting you,

38:21who you are,

38:23and who Cameron is,

38:24and Collin is,

38:25I just think that that was able to cover a lot of

38:28what mom went through.

38:29But it's like,

38:30oh my gosh,

38:31we have another sister,

38:32and two more,

38:33and other niece,

38:34and another nephew.

38:34Like, this is awesome.

38:36I'm glad that I had a desire to find my family.

38:40I'm glad that someone desired to find me.

38:44You know, it could have gone a lot of different ways.

38:48Easter 2018 was tough because it was a year to the date,

38:59almost, of when my mother was diagnosed with cancer.

39:02I remember sitting on the couch at Ben's house,

39:05thinking that I'd lost everything.

39:08But if we think about what Easter represents with,

39:13you know, rebirth and renewal,

39:15I think it was a good first holiday,

39:18or celebration,

39:19or family gathering to have,

39:22because it symbolized a new family.

39:28The connection that I wanted,

39:30that I hoped for,

39:31had Debra still been alive,

39:33I don't think I'll ever be able to capture that,

39:37because she's just not here.

39:39But as I find out things about my birth mother,

39:44things like she was also in education,

39:48things like Camille has said our hands look alike,

39:52and my kids even saw a picture where they said,

39:55they gave them chills,

39:56we look so much alike.

39:57I think maybe that is a level of connectedness.

40:01If my birth mother was here,

40:05the message that I gave to Ben when we met that Sunday

40:11would pretty much be the same.

40:13We're supposed to do that other one.

40:14You know, I would just basically want her to know

40:18that I've had a good life,

40:20I've had a happy life,

40:21that, you know, I feel like the strength that I have

40:27is in my DNA.

40:29I definitely was raised by a mother

40:31who was strong and resilient,

40:33but then to find out that I was birthed by a mother

40:37who also had this resiliency,

40:39and just incredible strength.

40:42I just take heart, you know,

40:44that I can be a part of that legacy and keep it going.

40:51Why does he not want me to be around his family?

40:57That's what started making me feel like,

40:59is he hiding something from me?

41:01They just said to us,

41:03I think you know who he is,

41:04but you don't know who he really is.

41:06This was big front page news for weeks.

41:11Man, he was able to do that,

41:13and nobody knew for so long?

41:15I was taking the secret to my grave.

41:18I'm like, oh, my God.

41:20This is not real.

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