- 6 hours ago
POLYAMOROUS triad El, Jah and Moshé are raising a brood of eight children between them. El and Jah already had two children together when Jah came to her husband with a surprisingly simple proposal: "I want a wife." After agreeing to open up their marriage, the couple met Moshé - and it was not long before the two women were pregnant "at the same time by the same man." This would soon become a recurring coincidence, as Moshé told Truly: "Every time that we're pregnant at the same time [Jah] gets pregnant first, me and El help her deliver the baby and help her through postpartum - and then not much longer after that it's my turn to have the baby." El's two "wives" have now been pregnant at the same time three times - Jah has given birth to five of the children, whilst Moshé has had three. Jah had always wanted help raising the children, but having babies at the same time as Moshé brought another unexpected benefit: the two moms are able to feed each other's babies. As Jah explained, "We both produce milk, so the weight is not all on one person." However, after sharing this aspect of their parenting online - as well as their polyamorous dynamic more generally - the triad started to receive judgement and negativity in their comment section. Some have deemed their feeding routine to be "weird", whilst others have suggested the moms are responsible for "creating fatherless homes" and that their children must be "confused as hell" by their parents' polyamorous dynamic. The triad are adamant that their children benefit from their choices, though - as El justified, "We wanted them to see unity and diversity within our parenting." Still, there have been disagreements over the years with family members who were concerned about both the parents and the children. So with El's mom Patricia visiting today, El is keen to understand where she stands. Has Patricia accepted Moshé as her son's second wife? Is she on board with the children having two moms? And how does she feel the three parents are handling life with eight children?
Follow the family:
https://www.youtube.com/@Lovejals
https://www.tiktok.com/@lovejals
https://www.instagram.com/jahjal369
https://www.instagram.com/moshaejal
Follow the family:
https://www.youtube.com/@Lovejals
https://www.tiktok.com/@lovejals
https://www.instagram.com/jahjal369
https://www.instagram.com/moshaejal
Category
🎈
FunTranscript
00:00We were pregnant at the same time.
00:01By the same man.
00:03So what?
00:04I asked my husband for another wife.
00:06And now we have eight children.
00:09Stop creating fatherless homes.
00:12I feel bad for the kids.
00:13They be confused as hell.
00:16We're not discussing for feeding each other's babies.
00:18We both produce milk, so we get to share that load.
00:22Elle's mom had a lot to say about our poly family.
00:25And today, we're going to find out if she still disagrees.
00:29Were you all ever concerned about how the children felt
00:31about having two moms?
00:36Hi.
00:37Welcome.
00:38Come meet my children and meet my wives.
00:41Hi, I'm Ja.
00:42I'm O'Shea.
00:43My name is Elle.
00:44This is Koa.
00:46And then we have Kyra here sleeping.
00:48We're in a polyamorous triad with eight children.
00:51Harvest.
00:53We're just finishing getting ready, brushing their teeth.
00:56Spit.
00:58So between me and Elle, we have Anaya, Joya, Leary, Natsuru, and Koa.
01:05And then between me and Elle, we have True, Harvest, and Ky.
01:10I've been with Ja for 13 years.
01:13I've been with Mo for six years.
01:16I don't know, seven years.
01:17We became polyamorous because of me.
01:19I basically brought it to Elle and I was just like, I want a wife.
01:24And he was like, are you serious?
01:26Are you trying to set me up?
01:28And I'm like, I'm really serious.
01:31What were you hoping to get out of polyamory?
01:33Expanding our love life, help with the children, having like that sisterhood bond in the household
01:40without having to leave my house and looking for it outside.
01:44I just noticed it.
01:46It's cute.
01:46Having two moms now in the household is like, okay, like you're handling the kitchen.
01:51I'm handling the laundry.
01:52When it was just me by myself, things were getting like piled up.
01:56You want some oil?
01:57Now it's like we have like a flow with the children.
01:59We kind of got like all eyes on them.
02:01I've dated couples before.
02:04I didn't know I was going to get super serious with them and build a family with them.
02:07Me and Ja got to know each other more and everything just started falling into place.
02:12It was like, I love you.
02:16Who's with who?
02:18So our relationship dynamic are we all have intimate, romantic relations.
02:23With each other.
02:24Yeah, with each other.
02:25I'm with Elle, I'm with Ja, Ja's with Elle, Ja's with me.
02:29Yeah, we're all together.
02:30Yeah.
02:30Did you have any concerns about how the kids would react to having a third parent?
02:35No, actually we wanted them to see unity and diversity within our parenting.
02:44Our youngest was nine months at the time and our oldest was four.
02:47So I feel like it was kind of like, I didn't think they were really going to care.
02:51And all the other children we had together, so.
02:55Have you guys ever been concerned about confusing the kids with three parent figures?
02:59No, I've never been concerned about confusing the children.
03:02I feel like it gives them more chance to figure out who they are.
03:07They have more examples of how to be good people.
03:10Yeah, in different ways.
03:12I think our children understand our poly relationship.
03:15They don't overly know about the term poly, but they know that they have two moms.
03:20They start our little babies.
03:21They don't need to know about all the details, you know.
03:26Yeah.
03:26How much do you help each other out?
03:27I feel like we're very involved with each other's babies as much as we can.
03:32Every time that we're pregnant at the same time, she gets pregnant first.
03:34Me and Elle help her deliver the baby and help her through postpartum.
03:40And then not much longer after that, it's my turn to have the baby.
03:44We both produce milk, so the weight is not all in one person.
03:49We get to share that load.
03:50When and why did you start feeding each other's babies?
03:52And was it strange at first?
03:54All right, come on up today.
03:58So we started feeding each other's babies in 2021.
04:02We treat all the children like they're our own.
04:06They are.
04:07Yeah.
04:07It wasn't strange at all.
04:09It just felt natural to help my wife out when our baby needed something.
04:13Exactly.
04:14We're in one household.
04:15These are all my babies.
04:17You're so lovable.
04:18She is.
04:19Our bodies are different.
04:21So they're getting like a double dose of nutrients from us.
04:26And like our babies get like super big.
04:28Yeah.
04:30I'll see like some women two days postpartum and they're like back cooking and cleaning
04:34because they don't have that support.
04:36Can you grab those lentils?
04:38How would you describe these two different parenting styles?
04:40Overall, I feel like I'm the strictest parent.
04:43I am like the more lenient parent.
04:46I feel like my job mostly is to keep them safe and make sure they're mentally able to be free.
04:58We decided to homeschool our children around the COVID time.
05:03I kind of just saw like the ins and out of school and I would like to control that more
05:07and keep them safe and teach them.
05:10This yeast, it may look like some dirt or flour or something, but this is actually a bacteria.
05:24What are some of the challenges you've experienced parenting as a tryout?
05:28Us being so different sometimes.
05:30Just organization and keeping things clean.
05:36Poly parenting is definitely not for the week.
05:39Do you like having three parents?
05:41Yeah.
05:43What's the best part of having three parents?
05:46A lot of help.
05:49Sometimes it's a learning curve or growing pains that we go through,
05:52but communication gets us there every time.
05:55We love to communicate and we just all flow.
05:59I'm going to clean up.
06:00All right.
06:00Dad's going to clean up.
06:01Yeah.
06:01You're the man.
06:02Go.
06:02Come on, next it is.
06:03When did you start sharing your family dynamics on social media
06:07and what were the reactions like?
06:09We started sharing our polydynamic about three months ago.
06:13Typically it's just them trying to call the women dumb.
06:19Who in their right mind would want two wives?
06:22I feel like a lot of people want two.
06:25We have had some comments about us feeding each other's babies.
06:28Some of them was like, that's weird.
06:30I feel bad for the kids.
06:32They'd be confused as hell.
06:34They see all of us working together in harmony.
06:38It's not like we have a toxic dynamic or be yelling or cursing each other out.
06:43The children are confused.
06:44I'm confused by some of these comments.
06:46Stop creating fatherless homes.
06:50How is this creating fatherless homes?
06:52We know our love is true and genuine.
06:55The things people can say doesn't really resonate with us because we know who we are.
06:59I don't want to use crazy words, but I don't care what they think.
07:03I'm going to just say that.
07:04I can care less.
07:06It took a village back then and it takes a village now.
07:08That way.
07:09Even though a lot of people aren't in poly relationships, they take their children to the doctor.
07:14Strangers.
07:15Yeah, strangers.
07:16They sometimes have babysitters.
07:18We're all in the same house together.
07:19We know each other.
07:21It's the true village rather than sending your children out to all these random people.
07:26How have your families reacted to you guys being in poly relationships?
07:29Some of my family reacted as in a negative way, saying that it probably won't last.
07:37They already got you.
07:38Yeah, they got me coming in.
07:41Hey baby, how you doing?
07:44Elle's mom had a lot to say about our poly family.
07:47And today we're going to find out if she still disagrees.
07:52So we brought it up to you, mom, about us adding Moe.
07:56How did you feel about that?
07:59Well, I just was like shocked.
08:02You like my hair, baby?
08:03I just said, it's my wife, mom.
08:05And I said, huh?
08:07They young, they tripping, you know?
08:10I've been super close with his mom since I've met her, since I was 16.
08:14She was like really suspicious of the relationship.
08:17And she kept acting, like she was asking me, are you sure you're okay?
08:19Are you sure this is what you want?
08:21Were you all ever concerned about how the children felt about having two moms?
08:28We thought and still do believe it to be beneficial.
08:34I feel like if it was a situation where like I'm about to be like the mom outside of the
08:40relationship
08:41with the dad, I think it would have brought way more pressure.
08:45Mm-hmm.
08:46But with all of us being together, I think it flowed more naturally.
08:50I've been around you all in y'all growing bonding stage as well.
08:55I've seen you all have meetings, you know, where other people have counseling,
09:01one-on-one marriage counseling, whatever.
09:03Y'all counsel each other.
09:04Y'all sit down and get in the hot seat and express it.
09:07I've seen y'all cry it out.
09:09I commend you all for being positive about it.
09:13The best thing about having three parents in the home is
09:18giving the children more perspective on different personalities.
09:22They take on little bits from each, which makes them more whole when they
09:27creating their own personality.
09:29What do you love about your parents?
09:31I don't know.
09:32I don't know.
09:32People like to focus on the physical connection part of poly,
09:38but they're not thinking about like the day-to-day lifestyle stuff.
09:41I don't think there's a lot of representation behind
09:43poly families actually parenting.
09:47It's really nice having like a sister in the house with me that I could vibe
09:50with and, you know, talk and connect with and have help with the children.
09:54I love it.
09:56How many kids do you think you're going to have?
09:59I would put us at around 11.
10:01I'd say 13.
10:02I would think 10, but I love eight.
10:05I'm just going to say.
10:06I love it.
10:07I like eight too.
Comments