- 8 hours ago
Richard forgets his wedding anniversary but then tells Hyacinth that he had a new alarm installed as an anniversary present, only he has forgotten the code.
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00:37Good morning, dear.
00:41I said, good morning, dear.
00:48Time to wake up on this our special day.
00:58I know what you're doing.
01:00You're pretending to have forgotten.
01:04But I know you'd better pretend to have a picture of a bouquet.
01:09You have something in mind.
01:12You're going to surprise me.
01:20Are you up?
01:22What time is it?
01:26Are you smiling at me?
01:30Of course I'm smiling at you.
01:33Why are you smiling at me?
01:35I shall go and make some tea.
01:41A very good morning to you.
01:47What have I done?
01:51I wonder what he's bought me.
01:56He's so thoughtful, bless his heart.
01:59A little bossy now and again, but so thoughtful.
02:06I wonder what the surprise is.
02:12Perhaps it's coming by post.
02:15We'll see what the postman brings.
02:18when I'm calling you.
02:27I just thought, wake up.
02:31There's a man in our bedroom.
02:35I remember a time when I could say that with more confidence.
02:41What's wrong?
02:42There's a man in our bedroom.
02:45I think he's asleep.
02:46He's having a better time than I am.
02:50I'm not seeing things.
02:52Look!
02:53Near the wall!
02:54Oh.
03:00It's your father.
03:05Why is he just sitting there?
03:07There's probably some very reasonable explanation.
03:11Such as what?
03:12He's dead.
03:15He's not dead.
03:19He looks dead.
03:21He looks dead.
03:23Go and wake him up.
03:25Oh, days.
03:26That's one hell of an assignment to this time of the morning.
03:30Especially if he is dead.
03:34Was that the post?
03:36I don't think so.
03:40He would be late this morning.
03:44Oh, well, it all adds to the excitement.
03:48Ah, there you are, dear.
03:50Ready for breakfast?
03:52Well, just the usual.
03:54No, no, no.
03:55Not the usual.
03:56Something special.
03:58Now, what would you really like this morning for breakfast?
04:02You just sit there and think about it and tell me.
04:10Do I hear full English breakfast?
04:13Oh, it's been a long time since you cooked me a pudding.
04:15One full English breakfast coming up.
04:18Oh, first I must just catch the postman.
04:21Enjoy your orange juice, dear.
04:24All that lovely vitamin C.
04:28She's in a really good mood.
04:32I don't like this at all.
04:46Back in the morning.
05:06Oh, there you are.
05:09Stone in my shoe.
05:19That's better.
05:21Don't you just hate it when you get a stone in your shoe?
05:24I'm waiting for my mail.
05:26Have you anything for me?
05:28Yes.
05:29I knew it.
05:31He's pretending he's forgotten and all the time I...
05:35Is this all?
05:36That's it.
05:38Well, there must be some mistake.
05:40I'm expecting a package from my husband.
05:42Sorry, no more for Bucket.
05:46Are you sure?
05:49This is most inconvenient.
05:52My husband's anniversary gift is lurking somewhere in your sorting houses.
05:57You can tell the postmaster general.
06:00I don't see him that often.
06:01Did you hear more about this?
06:04You have a nap.
06:05You'll be quite safe down here.
06:07It was terrible.
06:12You'll be all right now.
06:14Onslow's here.
06:16Here you'll notice.
06:17When I should be in bed.
06:18Your father should be in bed.
06:20I'm not going back up there.
06:22Never.
06:23Ever.
06:24It was horrible.
06:25Now, you just go to sleep.
06:31What's that with father?
06:33He says his bedroom's haunted.
06:35He's seen something.
06:37We have got a ghost.
06:39Let's hope it's Andy round the house.
06:42What kind of ghost is it?
06:44It's this figure of a woman.
06:48Wouldn't you know?
06:49Oh, that's all we need round here, another woman.
06:52You're not still on about Mr. What's It, are you?
06:56Oh, well.
06:57Changing his mind like that.
06:59Going back to some redhead in Poland.
07:04Oh, well.
07:05Men.
07:05Who needs them?
07:08We girls do.
07:12You mustn't be so bitter, Rose.
07:16Men have just as much right to change their minds as us ladies.
07:21Well, I couldn't pronounce him anyway.
07:24What about me?
07:26What?
07:28Sorry, Daddy.
07:29I'm not going back up there.
07:31It was ghastly.
07:33It's all right.
07:35Well, get Hyacinth's vicar.
07:37Oh, yes.
07:39Let's get the vicar.
07:40Yes.
07:40Oh, but not before I've got my make-up on.
07:43Ouch.
07:47No, I want the senior postal official.
07:51Hmm?
07:53Well, if he's the area manager, I suppose he'll have to do.
07:57Though I should have preferred something on a national scale.
08:01Who are you calling?
08:03A very negligent post office.
08:05They've let you down.
08:07Let me down?
08:08And a very good morning to you, too.
08:12Though it's not been a good morning for me.
08:15Look, you have some serious failures in your department.
08:20The surprise from my husband hasn't arrived.
08:27Well, for our wedding anniversary, he never forgets our wedding anniversary.
08:40No, of course it was coming by post.
08:44Yeah.
08:45You've let him down.
08:48I don't know what size package.
08:50It's a surprise.
08:51All I know is it hasn't arrived.
08:54Yes, I'll give you my name and address.
08:56It's Buket.
08:57B-U-C-K-E-T.
09:00No, it is Buket.
09:03And my address?
09:05Hi, I can explain.
09:07Over breakfast.
09:09Oh.
09:10Now, I'm going to cook you a full English breakfast.
09:16Oh.
09:16I'll just put the kettle on.
09:18Now, leave all that.
09:19It really is a big surprise, isn't it?
09:24Yes, I think that it will be.
09:30Do you know they've had another burglary at number 23?
09:34They've taken the video again.
09:36Don't thieves lack imagination.
09:40That's twice in three months.
09:44Harsinth will be livid.
09:46Oh.
09:47She can't bear anyone getting more attention than her.
09:53What are you doing?
09:55I'm going to call Harsinth and tell her.
09:58Oh, that's wicked.
10:00Just a caring act, Liz.
10:03I mean, what's her neighbours for?
10:06She'll hate it.
10:07I know she'll just hate it.
10:09Yes.
10:12Now, come along.
10:14Don't keep me in suspense any longer.
10:17Where's my surprise?
10:20Is it something I've always wanted?
10:23N-not really.
10:26Oh, a complete surprise.
10:28Richard, how clever of you.
10:37To, er...
10:38To tell you the truth, Hyacinth...
10:40Oh, excuse me, dear.
10:41That's bound to be someone important.
10:45Hey, resident.
10:47It's the lady of the house speaking.
10:50Hyacinth, for once, in all these years, I've forgotten our wedding anniversary.
10:58I'm terribly sorry, Anna.
11:00I'll make it up to you somehow.
11:04Hyacinth, for once, in all these years...
11:08Number 23's been burgled again.
11:10Number 23's been burgled again.
11:11That's twice in three months.
11:13How pretentious.
11:15What were you saying, dear?
11:19The surprise for our wedding anniversary.
11:22Because of all these burglaries, I've decided to have security installed for you.
11:31Oh, Richard!
11:35What a wonderful idea!
11:39Oh, oh, oh!
11:43Our own custom-made superior security installation for better class premises.
11:51Then people will understand that the reason we're not burgled is our security system.
11:58And not that we've nothing worth taking.
12:03Oh, and there you were, pretending you'd forgotten.
12:12No, it has to be today.
12:14Someone has to call today.
12:17Yes, I realise you can't install it today, but can you send someone round to inspect the place?
12:22No, I realise it's short notice, but...
12:25Excuse me, sir, but are you married, by any chance?
12:30Well, have you ever forgotten your wedding anniversary?
12:34But then you'll understand my urgency.
12:39You are a gentleman, sir.
12:43Oh, one more thing.
12:44Can you representative pretend that I ordered it a week ago?
12:49Good man.
12:50Thank you very much.
12:58I want you to be the first to know, Elizabeth.
13:04I'm going to be alarmed.
13:08Oh, you needn't be alarmed, Hyacinth.
13:10I haven't touched it yet.
13:13No, dear.
13:16Richard is going to alarm me for our wedding anniversary.
13:21Miss Whitaker.
13:22Oh, thank you.
13:24Well, you have to admire his spirit after all these years.
13:29It's his surprise for me.
13:31To alarm you for your wedding anniversary?
13:34Yes.
13:35He's getting a firm of specialists in to do it.
13:42And I thought he'd forgotten.
13:45For one terrible moment, I thought he'd forgotten.
13:54Hello, boy.
13:56Hi.
14:03Oh, hello, Vicar.
14:05Good morning.
14:08Oh, a burglar alarm.
14:11Yes, of course, dear.
14:14Well, you had me wondering there for a moment.
14:17I think it's sweet of Richard to want to secure me against intruders.
14:23Is it because of the burglary at number 23?
14:25Oh, no, dear.
14:26He ordered it some time ago.
14:28I believe that he feels, as I do, that someone has to set the tone for the neighbourhood.
14:35Will it be a very loud tone, Hyacinth?
14:38Oh, yes, dear, of course.
14:40But in the best possible taste.
14:43You know, people must have been wondering why I haven't been alarmed before.
14:48After all, there is extensive interest in my royal doolton with the hand-painted periwinkles.
14:54Yes, I can assure you that the whole neighbourhood knows about it.
14:58There you are, you see.
14:59Biscuit?
15:00No, thank you.
15:03And then the Sheridan's Pearl Button Collection.
15:06No, I'm afraid you're nobody these days without a burglar alarm.
15:14The father's been seeing a figure.
15:17Female.
15:19A figure?
15:20It was terrifying.
15:22I'll never sleep in that room again.
15:25Of course you will, father.
15:27Just as soon as the vicar's wrestled with it spiritually.
15:31I don't know that I'm terribly good with apparitions.
15:34I don't even like to be too close to the coffin at funerals.
15:38Oh, just give it a whack, vicar.
15:40Do your best.
15:41Oh, I'm sure he will.
15:43Otherwise, we're stuck with him in our bedroom.
15:46But there's all that much happening in our bedroom.
15:50They can be such lonely places, bedrooms.
15:53It was there grinning at me.
15:56I woke up, opened my eyes, and there it was.
16:01I think that perhaps what I ought to do is seek specialist help.
16:05The church has people that specialise in this.
16:08Oh, you can do it, vicar.
16:10We've all got faith in you.
16:12Put him down, Rose.
16:13He's got work to do.
16:15We'll be right behind you, vicar.
16:17You can rely on that.
16:19Go on up, vicar.
16:25We've never been haunted before.
16:27Up to now, the only persistent unwelcome visitor
16:30has been the rent man.
16:32And you're I, sinf.
16:36That's the one, vicar, there.
16:38I think I could probably do this from outside the door.
16:42Oh, no, you go in, vicar.
16:43Just make yourself at home.
16:45I could go in with him if he likes.
16:47It's something he has to do on his own.
16:49Oh, I don't mind Rose with me if she wishes.
16:51She'll only get under your feet.
16:58Be gone.
16:59I command you.
17:08I won't go in anyway.
17:10No need to make a fuss.
17:11It was he who invited me last night at over-sixties.
17:35Bucket.
17:43Uh, it's bouquet.
17:46What?
17:49Bouquet.
17:50Oh, right.
17:52Sorry.
17:53Try again.
18:06Mrs. Bouquet.
18:09I'm from Excel Alarms.
18:12Do come in.
18:13After you've removed your shoes.
18:17Under no circumstances do I allow alien shoes on my herringbone woodblock or my grade one axe minster.
18:25It's a house rule.
18:28Of course.
18:32She is.
18:34She's getting the poor devil to remove his shoes.
18:37Look.
18:40She's being fair.
18:42She's letting him sit on the doorstep.
18:44How thoughtful of her.
18:46She knows her manners.
18:48I mean, he could be hopping about on one leg.
18:51I think it's a triumph for Richard.
18:54You know why all this has happened, don't you?
18:56I mean, you know why they're getting the security system?
18:58Because Richard forgot their wedding anniversary.
19:01He only came up with the scheme at the last second.
19:04And she doesn't know he forgot?
19:06No.
19:07And he's got away with it.
19:09Well, good for Richard.
19:11Yes.
19:12Oh, I've never seen the poor chap look so relieved.
19:16I bet.
19:23I shall need extra security for my lounge.
19:26It houses my royal doulton with the hand-painted periwinkles.
19:31Every room will be secure, madam.
19:33Good.
19:35Pass.
19:41What colour choices do you offer for the box?
19:44The box?
19:45The thing that goes on the wall.
19:47The thing that people can see outside.
19:49Oh, you mean the alarm itself?
19:51Yes.
19:52It's blue.
19:53I don't know blue.
19:55What else do you have?
19:57I'm afraid that's what we use, madam.
20:00It's blue.
20:07Look.
20:10You'll have to alter that.
20:11What?
20:12I have my mind set on a dusky pink.
20:20There was a stately home we visited once, and theirs was dusky pink.
20:32Yes, everybody else was looking at the Rembrandts, but I remember thinking then,
20:36and yes, that's very nice.
20:38If I ever have an alarm, I want it to be dusky pink.
20:48What kind of noise do you make?
20:52Noise do I make?
20:55No worse than your average human being.
21:00No, I mean the alarm.
21:01What kind of noise does the alarm make?
21:04It's a siren, madam.
21:06A siren?
21:08I hope it's like the QE2s.
21:13We've sailed on her, you know.
21:20Thank you very much indeed, and I look forward to hearing from you.
21:24Yes.
21:25Don't forget your shoes.
21:27No.
21:31Oh, I'm sorry.
21:33Bye.
21:33Have a good one.
21:52Was that a noise?
21:53Well, the only noise I can hear is you saying,
21:58was that a noise?
21:59We do have to be careful, Richard.
22:02Why?
22:03It's our last night without an alarm.
22:06You want me to go and have a look round?
22:09Yes, dear.
22:10No.
22:11With particular reference to my Capo de Monte
22:14and my Royal Duton with the hand-painted periwinkles.
22:18I'll hate it if we're burgled tonight, our last alarmless night.
22:23Especially by the lower-class type of burglar who goes to number 23.
22:29Anyone who goes to number 23 twice has to be lacking in taste.
22:35I cannot bear the thought that Sheridan's Pearl Button collection
22:38might go to people of that calibre.
22:42It's fine.
22:43There's no one about.
22:46Good.
22:50Ah!
22:53Was that a noise?
22:55Yes, it was me stubbing my toe in the dark.
22:59Oh.
23:00Oh, well, that's all right, then.
23:19Dusky pink.
23:21The QE2 siren.
23:25You don't happen to have the telephone number of the stately home
23:28that also has the dusky pink alarm, do you?
23:30I thought I might just give them a call
23:33since we've both chosen to be alarmed in the same way.
23:37No, I'm afraid we haven't, madam.
23:39Never mind.
23:40I'll try directory inquiries.
23:42Well, thank you for your work
23:44and for not damaging my walls.
23:48Too badly.
24:00Oh, Richard.
24:02Our own alarm system.
24:05What a wonderful anniversary present.
24:10Which four-number code have you chosen
24:13to stop and start the system?
24:15A romantic one.
24:17A romantic number?
24:20A romantic number
24:22that we shall never forget.
24:26As you were kind enough to buy it for our anniversary,
24:29I thought I'd choose a number we'll always remember.
24:32The date of our wedding.
24:36The day, the month,
24:38and the last two digits of the year.
24:41Now, isn't that romantic?
24:43Well, it's certainly memorable.
24:48Do you think we should hold an alarm-warming party?
24:53Is that usual?
24:55Oh, I don't think so.
24:57Oh, I thought I'd invite those people from the stately home.
25:04Oh, well.
25:06Perhaps another time.
25:11I know what I could do.
25:14I could telephone number 23
25:17and tell them that if they're being burgled again,
25:20they can phone us
25:22and we'll sound our alarm.
25:39Ready?
25:40Yeah.
25:41Off you go, you two.
25:42Enjoy your evening.
25:44Are you sure you don't mind me popping out for a drink?
25:46Good heavens, no.
25:49Why should I?
25:50I'm perfectly safe here now I'm alarmed.
25:54No, off you go.
25:56I've plenty to do
25:58drawing up my guest list
25:59for my security and alarm-warming candlelight supper.
26:03Oh, you two.
26:12Bye!
26:14Ah!
26:15Shh!
26:22You will tread carefully as you pass my house, won't you?
26:26I've recently installed a very sensitive and expensive alarm system.
26:31I'd hate you to be startled if it should go off.
26:35Pass.
26:43Yes, that's the way.
26:45Please tell your friends.
26:49And you got away with it.
26:52She still doesn't know you forgot the wedding anniversary.
26:54Shh.
26:56It's a triumph against all odds.
26:59I never thought I'd make it.
27:01Well done, Richard.
27:04I think this deserves another round.
27:10Thanks very much, Emmett.
27:21What's that?
27:30Ah, a nine, two...
27:35Oh, my God, what was the year?
27:38What year did we get married?
27:40I've only got seconds to think.
27:42Oh, she'll kill me!
27:44She will kill me!
27:45It was 62.
27:48It was 62.
27:50It was 62.
27:52Oh, my God.
27:54That was close.
27:56Oh, that was close.
28:01It's more than 62!
28:04Oh, my God.
28:09Oh, my God.
28:09Richard, you're okay.
28:10You've forgotten the date of our wedding.
28:14Oh!
28:17Oh, my God.
28:20Oh, my God.
28:22Oh, my God.
28:30Oh, my God.
28:31Oh, my God.
28:33Oh, my God.
28:33Oh, my God.