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Watch The Big Bang Theory AMZN GalaxyTV Season 3 Episode 15 online in HD on Dailymotion.
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00:01I miss you too, sweetie.
00:04Listen, I gotta go, but I'll see you tonight.
00:06Bye-bye.
00:07Bye-bye.
00:09No, you hang up first.
00:12Hello?
00:15Dude, I'm glad you finally got a girlfriend,
00:18but do you have to do all that lovey-dovey stuff
00:20in front of those of us who don't?
00:21Actually, he might have to.
00:23There's an economic concept known as a positional good
00:26in which an object is only valued by the possessor
00:29because it's not possessed by others.
00:31The term was coined in 1976 by economist Fred Hirsch
00:34to replace the more colloquial but less precise
00:36neener-neener.
00:38It's not true.
00:39My happiness is not dependent on my best friend
00:42being miserable and alone.
00:44Although I'd be lying if I said it wasn't a little bit of a perk.
00:48Who's miserable and alone?
00:49Me.
00:49Oh, I used to be like that.
00:52Then I got a girlfriend.
00:54In pre-1976 terms, neener-neener.
00:58Hey, what are you and Bernadette doing
01:00for your first Valentine's Day?
01:01Yeah, I'm pulling out all the stops.
01:03There's a $39.95 lover special at P.F. Chang's.
01:07Egg rolls, dumplings, bottomless walk,
01:10and you get your picture taken on the big marble horse out front.
01:14Given that St. Valentine was a third-century Roman priest
01:18who was stoned and beheaded,
01:20wouldn't a more appropriate celebration of the evening
01:22be taking one steady gal to witness a brutal murder?
01:26I understand your point,
01:28but given a choice, Jews always go with Chinese food.
01:33If anyone's interested,
01:34I'll be spending this Valentine's Day
01:36the same way I spend every Valentine's Day,
01:38buying rotisserie chicken from the supermarket,
01:40taking it home, standing over the sink,
01:42and eating it out of the package in my bare hands
01:44like an animal.
01:47Okay, so to sum up,
01:48one giant marble horse,
01:50one asinine comet,
01:52one lonely man and his chicken,
01:53and let's see who's left.
01:56Oh, that's right, my plans!
02:01Isn't anyone gonna ask?
02:03Fine, tell us you're gonna have sex with Penny.
02:05That's not what I was gonna tell you.
02:07It's okay, I don't mind hearing about your sex life.
02:09It's his that bugs me.
02:14Guess who the university is sending to Switzerland
02:16to attend a conference
02:17and see the CERN super collider on February 14th?
02:20Professor Norton, although God knows why.
02:22He hasn't published anything in notes
02:24since he won that Nobel Prize.
02:26Actually, Professor Norton can't make it.
02:28He threw his back out rock climbing.
02:29I heard he threw his back out climbing
02:31on his new girlfriend.
02:32The big boob weather girl on Channel 2?
02:34That's the one.
02:34In any case,
02:36they're asking me to fill in for him.
02:38In Switzerland or with the big boob weather girl?
02:42Switzerland.
02:43And I get to bring a guest.
02:45No, this is incredible.
02:48I'm so happy,
02:49I'm not even gonna question their judgment
02:50in picking you.
02:52I'm just gonna run home and start packing.
02:58Why wouldn't you take Penny?
03:01I am taking Penny.
03:04Oh, well then I anticipate
03:06an awkward situation when you get home.
03:10Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state
03:14and nearly 14 billion years ago
03:16expansion started way more.
03:18The earth began to cool,
03:19the autotrophs began to drew me and
03:21recalls, develop tools,
03:22we built a wall,
03:23we built a pyramid.
03:24Math, science, history,
03:26unraveling the mystery
03:27that all started with a big bang.
03:29Hey!
03:37Sheldon, you got a minute?
03:38Of course, my good friend.
03:40Come in.
03:42Help me out.
03:43Which ski hat says
03:45Opry Super Collider?
03:49Sheldon, I'm not taking you to Switzerland.
03:52Well, of course you are.
03:53Who else would you take?
03:55Penny.
03:56What?
03:56That's absurd.
03:58Penny has no interest in subatomic particle research.
04:01Yes, but it'll be Valentine's Day.
04:04We can go sightseeing and skiing
04:06and make love in front of a roaring fire
04:08in the shadow of the snow-capped Alps.
04:12But Penny has no interest in subatomic particle research.
04:17I'm sorry, Sheldon.
04:18Sorry?
04:20I've been dreaming about going to the Large Hadron Collider
04:22since I was nine years old.
04:24Yeah?
04:25Well, I've been dreaming about spending Valentine's Day
04:26with a girl since I was six.
04:29Shame on you.
04:32That's no dream for a scientist.
04:36Okay, what's the big surprise?
04:38Just a minute.
04:40This tray contains clues
04:43as to what you and I are going to be doing
04:45on Valentine's Day.
04:47Oh, okay.
04:49Let's see.
04:50We've got milk chocolate,
04:53Swiss cheese, fondue.
04:56My lactose intolerant boyfriend
04:58is going to eat all this
04:59and I'm going to climb on his back
05:00and rock it to the moon?
05:07No.
05:09But it does involve air travel.
05:13Okay.
05:14Um, let me slice this Swiss cheese
05:18with my Swiss army knife
05:21and then you can wash it down
05:23with a cup of Swiss Miss Instant Coco.
05:27Okay, I'm starting to think Swiss is key here.
05:31Uh-huh.
05:34We're going to Disneyland
05:34and ride the Matterhorn.
05:39How does that involve air travel?
05:42We're going to Disney World
05:43and ride the Matterhorn.
05:46No.
05:47Okay, sweetie, this started out fun,
05:48but I'm over it.
05:51We're going to Switzerland
05:53to see the CERN Super Collider.
05:58And ski.
05:59We'll also go skiing.
06:00We're going skiing in Switzerland?
06:02Well, you'll ski.
06:03I'll fall.
06:03But we will be in Switzerland
06:06for Valentine's Day.
06:07Oh, my God!
06:09Leonard, that's incredible!
06:10Not so fast.
06:13You might want to hold off
06:14on lighting your rib-y-leet-ly, Penny.
06:16My rib-y-what-ly?
06:18Rib-y-leet-ly.
06:19It means turn-up light
06:20and refers to a traditional lantern
06:22hand-carved from a root vegetable
06:23and used to celebrate
06:24certain Swiss festivals,
06:25which you will not be celebrating
06:27because, A, these festivals
06:28occur in the fall.
06:30And, B, you will not be going
06:32to Switzerland.
06:34Sheldon, we've been through this.
06:36I'm taking Penny.
06:37Afraid not.
06:37Do you recognize this?
06:39Not the roommate agreement.
06:41Indeed.
06:42The roommate agreement.
06:43I call your attention
06:44to the friendship rider
06:46in Appendix C,
06:47Future Commitments,
06:48number 37.
06:49In the event one friend
06:50is ever invited to visit
06:51the Large Hadron Collider,
06:53now under construction
06:54in Switzerland,
06:55he shall invite the other friend
06:56to accompany him.
06:57Oh, for God's sake!
07:00You actually put that
07:01in an agreement?
07:02Yeah, we also put in
07:03what happens if one of us
07:04wins a MacArthur grant
07:05or if one of us
07:06gets superpowers
07:07or if one of us
07:08is bitten by a zombie.
07:10He can't kill me
07:11even if I turn.
07:14Is there anything in there
07:15about if one of you
07:16gets a girlfriend?
07:17No, that seemed
07:18a little far-fetched.
07:22Sheldon, do you really
07:23expect to enforce this?
07:25I've lived up to
07:26all my commitments
07:27under the agreement.
07:28At least once a day
07:29I ask how you are,
07:30even though I simply
07:31don't care.
07:32I no longer stage
07:33spontaneous biohazard drills
07:35after 10 p.m.
07:36And I abandon my goal
07:38to master Toovan throat singing.
07:40Okay, I know I shouldn't ask,
07:42but what is it?
07:51I'd be much further along
07:52if I'd been allowed
07:53to practice.
07:55Look, Sheldon,
07:56I know it's in the agreement.
07:57And if you turn into a zombie,
07:59I promise I will not kill you.
08:00In fact, I'll even
08:01let you eat my brains,
08:02but I am taking Penny
08:03to Switzerland.
08:05Is that your final decision?
08:06It is.
08:07Very well.
08:12It's not over, is it?
08:14What do you think?
08:29It's got a bit of traffic
08:30this morning, huh?
08:35Think it's going to rain?
08:39Instead of underpants,
08:40I covered my crotch
08:41with potato salad
08:42this morning.
08:43Thoughts?
08:46Okay, I know
08:46what will cheer you up.
08:47Let's play one of
08:48your driving games.
08:50All right.
08:52This game is called
08:53Traitors.
08:56I will name
08:57three historical figures.
08:58You put them in order
08:59of the heinousness
09:00of their betrayal.
09:01Benedict Arnold,
09:02Judas,
09:03Dr. Leonard Hofstadter.
09:06You really think I belong
09:07with Benedict Arnold
09:08and Judas?
09:09You're right.
09:10Judas had the decency
09:11to hang himself
09:12after what he did.
09:14Come on, Sheldon.
09:15Can't you at least
09:16try to understand
09:17how much this means
09:18to me?
09:20Round two.
09:21Leonard Hofstadter,
09:22Darth Vader,
09:23Rupert Murdoch.
09:25Rupert Murdoch?
09:26He owns Fox
09:27and they canceled Firefly.
09:32Hint,
09:32he and Darth Vader
09:33are tied for number two.
09:39Sorry I couldn't hang
09:40with you last night.
09:41I had a date
09:42with Bernadette.
09:43I know.
09:43I saw the tweet.
09:46So what did he end up doing?
09:47Not much.
09:48Nuked a burrito.
09:49Prayed to the Hindu god Urvashi
09:51that your bowels would loosen
09:52and your penis would droop
09:53like a willow tree.
09:56You seen Sheldon?
09:57No.
09:58Is he still mad
09:59about the super collider?
10:00Yeah, he thinks
10:01I betrayed him.
10:02Come on,
10:03what would you guys do
10:03if you were me?
10:05I'd take Sheldon
10:06to Switzerland.
10:07Seriously?
10:08Absolutely.
10:09We might leave him there.
10:18What the hell is that?
10:20Uh, let's see.
10:23Yeah, 30 pieces of silverware.
10:47Morning, old chum.
10:49What's going on?
10:50I've made you breakfast.
10:52I have juice, coffee,
10:54and pancakes in the shape
10:56of some of your favorite
10:57fictional characters.
10:58See, here's Frodo.
11:00You made Frodo pancakes?
11:02Yeah, I used coconut shavings
11:04to do the hair on his feet.
11:06If you need to void your bladder
11:08before eating,
11:09I can keep them warm
11:10with this beret
11:11that I thoroughly laundered
11:12and pressed into service
11:13as a pancake cozy.
11:16Why are you doing this?
11:18It's by way of an apology
11:20for my recent behavior.
11:21I've had some time to reflect,
11:23and I've come to realize
11:25that friendship is not
11:26an aggregation
11:27of written agreements.
11:28It's the result
11:29of two people respecting
11:31and caring for each other.
11:33Butterscotch scone?
11:35Thanks.
11:38It's good.
11:39What you're tasting
11:40is respect
11:41and affection.
11:43And about a pound of Crisco.
11:46After you've finished breakfast,
11:48I thought we could spend the day
11:50watching the final season
11:51of Babylon 5
11:52with director commentary.
11:53You hate Babylon 5.
11:55I do.
11:55It fails as drama,
11:56science fiction,
11:57and it's hopelessly derivative.
11:59But you like it,
12:00and you're my friend.
12:03Okay, great.
12:07Still not taking you
12:08to Switzerland.
12:09Drab.
12:14No Frodo for you.
12:20Hello.
12:21Hello.
12:22All right,
12:23let's dispense
12:23with the friendly banter.
12:26I believe you know
12:27why I'm here.
12:28Well, I always figured
12:29it was to study us,
12:30discover our weaknesses,
12:31and report back
12:32to your alien overlords.
12:35It's amusing.
12:38Extraordinary intelligence
12:39might well appear
12:40extraterrestrial to you,
12:41but let me be more specific.
12:43I believe you know
12:44why I'm here
12:45in the laundry room.
12:47Better acoustics
12:48for your throat singing?
12:51I'm sorry.
12:57It's actually not bad.
13:00But my true purpose
13:02in being here
13:03will be revealed
13:04in this brief
13:05PowerPoint presentation.
13:07Lights.
13:17Why Sheldon Cooper, Ph.D.,
13:20should go to Switzerland
13:20to see the CERN supercollider,
13:22a PowerPoint presentation
13:23by Sheldon Cooper, Ph.D.
13:26Oh, for God's sakes.
13:29Here, we have
13:29a highly gifted researcher
13:31in the field
13:32of particle physics
13:33whose work
13:33has brought him
13:34to the precipice
13:35of forever changing
13:35mankind's understanding
13:36of the universe,
13:38a.k.a. me.
13:40And here,
13:41we have a waitress
13:42brushing her teeth
13:43with her finger,
13:45a.k.a. you.
13:48I'm sorry.
13:49Is this supposed
13:49to be buttering me up?
13:50Please hold all questions
13:51till the end
13:51of the presentation.
13:53This is the
13:54Large Hadron Collider
13:56at CERN
13:57in Switzerland,
13:57the product of decades
13:59of planning
13:59and construction.
14:00It is a mecca
14:01for physicists
14:02the world over.
14:04This is Bath and Body Works
14:06on Colorado Boulevard.
14:08They sell scented
14:09soaps and lotions,
14:10some of which
14:11contain glitter.
14:12Now,
14:13let's see if we can
14:14match the individual
14:15to the appropriate
14:16destination.
14:18Okay,
14:19show's over.
14:20No, it's not.
14:21I've got five more
14:22slides.
14:23Shut it.
14:24This is Leonard's decision.
14:25He invited me
14:25to Switzerland
14:26and I intend to go.
14:31Very well.
14:34Enjoy yourself.
14:35I'm going to be
14:36in the presence
14:37of something
14:37that I've dreamed
14:38of seeing for decades.
14:40I just hope
14:41you'll be able
14:41to appreciate
14:42the magnitude
14:43of where you are
14:43and what it represents.
14:48I'll talk to Leonard.
14:51You will?
14:53Yes.
14:54If it means
14:54that much to you,
14:56you should go.
14:57Oh,
14:58thank you.
15:02You're welcome.
15:04Since I rarely hug,
15:05I'm relying on your expertise
15:06regarding duration.
15:09I think we're there.
15:10Oh, good.
15:12Bye-bye.
15:18You know what?
15:19Even though
15:19I don't have a girlfriend,
15:20I can still have
15:21a good time
15:21on Valentine's Day.
15:22Trust me,
15:23you can't.
15:23I've tried.
15:25No, no, no, no.
15:26I'm going to have
15:26a me day.
15:28First,
15:28I'm going to go
15:28to one of those spas
15:29in Koreatown.
15:30Take a steam,
15:31get a massage.
15:32Then,
15:33I'm going to stop
15:33at a pet store
15:34and get licked
15:35by puppies.
15:39Sheldon,
15:39I need to talk to you.
15:40All right,
15:41my friend.
15:42Would you like
15:43some Hilaire mousse?
15:44Some what?
15:45Hilaire mousse.
15:46It's a traditional
15:46Swiss breakfast dish.
15:48I'm preparing
15:48my gastrointestinal system
15:50for the exotic cuisine
15:51of Switzerland.
15:53You're not going
15:54to Switzerland.
15:55Oh,
15:56but I am.
15:57Didn't Penny
15:57tell you the good news?
15:59She told me
15:59that you went
16:00behind my back
16:00to guilt her
16:01into letting you go
16:01instead of her.
16:03Yes,
16:03that good news.
16:05Well,
16:06forget it.
16:06I was the one
16:07who was invited.
16:08I get to decide
16:08who goes with me
16:09and it's Penny,
16:10not you.
16:11Howard,
16:12could you lower the lights?
16:13I have a short
16:13PowerPoint presentation.
16:15I don't need
16:16to see your presentation.
16:17This discussion
16:18is over.
16:19Well,
16:19that's a somewhat
16:20ambiguous response.
16:21Am I going or not?
16:23Sheldon,
16:24at this point,
16:24I would go by myself
16:26before I would take you.
16:28Really?
16:28Yeah,
16:29really.
16:30Well,
16:30then,
16:31you leave me
16:32no alternative.
16:33From this moment
16:34forward,
16:35we can be roommates,
16:36but we will
16:36no longer be friends.
16:38I'm sorry
16:39you feel that way.
16:40I don't think
16:40you're fully aware
16:41of the ramifications
16:42here,
16:43Leonard.
16:44Why don't you
16:45enlighten me?
16:46With the friendship
16:47clause of our
16:48roommate agreement
16:48nullified,
16:49you are no longer
16:50entitled to accompany me
16:51to go swimming
16:52because swimming at
16:52Bill Gates' house,
16:53should I be invited?
16:59Ooh,
17:00that's got to sting.
17:05Just think,
17:05this time tomorrow,
17:06we'll be in Geneva,
17:07Switzerland,
17:08for our first
17:09Valentine's Day.
17:10I know.
17:11I went shopping today
17:12and bought special
17:13undies for the occasion.
17:15Thermal?
17:16Because it's going
17:16to be cold.
17:18Think it through,
17:19Leonard.
17:21Oh.
17:26Gesundheit.
17:27Or as they say
17:28in Switzerland,
17:29gesundheit.
17:32Getting a cold?
17:34No, no,
17:34it's probably
17:35just allergies.
17:38Do you want
17:39an allergy pill?
17:39Because I have them all.
17:41Prescription,
17:41non-prescription,
17:42foreign,
17:42domestic,
17:43experimental?
17:44Do any of them work?
17:46Not really.
17:47I'm just an enthusiast.
17:59Annie?
18:02You okay?
18:04Does that sound
18:05okay to you?
18:08Do not come in here!
18:11What's going on?
18:12I'm having a tea party.
18:14What do you think's going on?
18:18I think I might have the flu.
18:23Or the plague.
18:27Our plane leaves at 9 a.m.
18:29Do you think
18:29you'll feel better by then?
18:34Yeah!
18:35Because I'm going to be dead!
18:40Hey, Sheldon?
18:42Listen,
18:43Penny's pretty sick
18:44and she's not going to be able
18:45to go to Switzerland,
18:47so...
18:47If you're still interested,
18:49you're welcome to come.
18:51Grr!
18:52Grr!
18:58Oh, great!
18:59I'll stop packing!
19:02In a minute.
19:06Grr!
19:08Oh, look!
19:09It's the whole air moose!
19:23Here's your soup.
19:24Chicken?
19:25Yes.
19:26With the little stars?
19:27Yes.
19:28Heated to 180 degrees?
19:30Why don't I pour it in your lap
19:32and you can tell me?
19:34I don't have to be mean.
19:36I'm sick.
19:37Yeah, well, I'm sick too.
19:38It's not my problem.
19:42I so understand how this happened to me.
19:45I'm scrupulous about my hygiene,
19:47I regularly disinfect my hands,
19:49and I avoid contact with other people
19:51on general principle.
19:53I don't know what to tell you, Sheldon.
19:58Oh, Penny, thank you.
20:01You're welcome.
20:10It's you!
20:11I touched you!
20:13Happy Valentine's Day.
20:26Oh, my goodness.
20:28Look at this room.
20:31Champagne, roses, dough, and little chocolates.
20:35This is going to be the best Valentine's Day ever.
20:40Yeah, I forgot about all this.
20:43But I never will.
20:46I never will.
20:47I never will.
20:48Hooray!
20:49I don't know.
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