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Watch The Big Bang Theory AMZN GalaxyTV Season 1 Episode 2 online in HD on Dailymotion.
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00:00Here you go. Pad Thai, no peanut.
00:03Does it have peanut oil?
00:04I'm not sure. Everyone keep an eye on Howard in case he starts to swell up.
00:10Since it's not bee season, you can have my epinephrine.
00:13Are there any chopsticks?
00:15You don't need chopsticks. This is Thai food.
00:16Here we go.
00:18Thailand has had the fork since the latter half of the 19th century.
00:21Interestingly, they don't actually put the fork in their mouth.
00:23They use it to put the food on a spoon, which then goes into their mouth.
00:27Ask him for a napkin. I dare you.
00:31I'll get it.
00:33Do I look puffy? I feel puffy.
00:36Hey, Leonard.
00:37Oh, hi, Penny.
00:38Am I interrupting?
00:39No.
00:39You're not swelling, Howard.
00:41No, no. Look at my fingers. They're like Vienna sausages.
00:44Sounds like you have company.
00:45They're not going anywhere.
00:48So you're coming home from work. That's great. How was work?
00:51Well, you know, it's a cheesecake factory. People order cheesecake and I bring it to them.
00:55So you kind of act as like a carbohydrate delivery system.
01:01Yeah. Call it whatever you want. I get minimum wage.
01:05Yeah.
01:07Anyways, I was wondering if you could help me out with something.
01:09Yes.
01:09Oh.
01:11Okay, great. I'm having some furniture delivered tomorrow and I may not be here, so...
01:14Oh.
01:17Hello.
01:22I'm sorry?
01:23Haven't you ever been told how beautiful you are in flawless Russian?
01:27No, I haven't.
01:28Get used to it.
01:30Yeah, I probably won't.
01:33Hey, Sheldon.
01:34Hi.
01:34Hey, Raj.
01:37Still not talking to me, huh?
01:39Don't take it personally. It's his pathology. He can't talk to women.
01:42He can't talk to attractive women, or in your case, a cheesecake-scented goddess.
01:48So, there's gonna be some furniture delivered?
01:50Yeah, yeah. If it gets here and I'm not here tomorrow, could you just sign for it and have them
01:53put them in my apartment?
01:54Yeah, no problem.
01:55Great. Here's my spare key. Thank you.
01:59Honey, wait.
02:00Yeah.
02:02Um, if you don't have any other plans, do you want to join us for Thai food and a Superman
02:08movie marathon?
02:09A marathon? Wow, how many Superman movies are there?
02:12You're kidding, right?
02:15You know, I do like the one where Lois Lane falls from the helicopter and Superman swooshes down and catches
02:20her. Which one was that?
02:21One.
02:23You realize that scene was rife with scientific inaccuracy.
02:26Yes, I know. Men can't fly.
02:28No, no. Let's assume that they can.
02:32Lois Lane is falling, accelerating at an initial rate of 32 feet per second per second.
02:36Superman swoops down to save her by reaching out two arms of steel.
02:39Miss Lane, who is now traveling at approximately 120 miles an hour, hits them and is immediately sliced into three
02:44equal pieces.
02:48Unless Superman matches her speed and decelerates.
02:51In what space, sir? In what space? She's two feet above the ground.
02:55You know, frankly, if he really loved her, he'd let her hit the pavement. It'd be a more merciful death.
03:00Excuse me. Your entire argument is predicated on the assumption that Superman's flight is a feat of strength.
03:06Are you listening to yourself? It is well established that Superman's flight is a feat of strength.
03:11It is an extension of his ability to leap tall buildings, an ability he derives from exposure to Earth's yellow
03:15sun.
03:15And you don't have a problem with that? How does he fly at night?
03:18A combination of the moon's solar reflection and the energy storage capacity of Kryptonian skin cells.
03:24I'm just going to go wash up.
03:26I have 2,600 comic books in there. I challenge you to find a single reference to Kryptonian skin cells.
03:32Challenge accepted.
03:37We're locked out.
03:39Also, the pretty guy left.
03:42Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state that nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started way around.
03:50The earth began to cool. The autotrophs began to drool.
03:52Neanderthals developed tools. We built a wall. We built a pyramid.
03:56Math, science, history, unraveling the mystery.
03:59That all started with a big bang.
04:01Hey!
04:06Okay.
04:07Her apartment's on the fourth floor, but the elevator's broken, so you're going to have to...
04:10Oh, you're just going to be done? Okay, cool. Thanks.
04:14I guess we'll just bring it up ourselves.
04:16I hardly think so.
04:19Why not?
04:20Well, we don't have a dolly or lifting belts or any measurable upper body strength.
04:26We don't need strength. We're physicists.
04:29We are the intellectual descendants of Archimedes.
04:31Give me a fulcrum and a lever and I can move the earth.
04:34It's just a matter of...
04:34I don't have this.
04:35I don't have this!
04:35You do not have this!
04:38Archimedes would be so proud.
04:46Do you have any ideas?
04:48Yes, but they all involve a green lantern and a power ring.
04:53Easy.
04:55Easy.
04:59Okay.
05:00Now we've got an inclined plane.
05:02The force required to lift is reduced by the sign of the angle of the stairs.
05:06Call it 30 degrees, so about half.
05:08Exactly half.
05:11Exactly half.
05:14Let's push.
05:18Okay.
05:19See, it's moving.
05:20This is easy.
05:21All the math.
05:24What's your formula for the corner?
05:25What?
05:29Oh.
05:30Okay.
05:31Uh.
05:33Okay, yeah, no problem.
05:34Just come up here and help me pull and turn.
05:41Ah, gravity, thou art a heartless bitch.
05:45You do understand that our efforts here will in no way increase the odds of you having sexual
05:50congress with this woman.
05:53Men do things for women without expecting sex.
05:55Yeah, those would be men who just had sex.
05:59I'm doing this to be a good neighbor.
06:02In any case, there's no way it could lower the odds.
06:07Almost there.
06:09Almost there.
06:11Almost there.
06:13No, we're not.
06:13No, we're not.
06:14No, we're not.
06:16Watch your fingers.
06:17Watch your fingers.
06:18Yeah.
06:18I've got my fingers.
06:22You okay?
06:23No.
06:24We heard great Caesar's ghost look at this place.
06:29So, Penny's a little messy.
06:31A little messy?
06:33The Mandelbrot set of complex numbers is a little messy.
06:36This is chaos.
06:37Excuse me.
06:39Explain to me an organizational system where a tray of flatware on a couch is valid.
06:44And I'm just inferring that this is a couch because the evidence suggests the coffee table's having a tiny garage
06:48sale.
06:51Did it ever occur to you that not everyone has the compulsive need to sort, organize, and label the entire
06:56world around them?
06:58No.
07:00Well, they don't.
07:02Hard as it may be for you to believe, most people don't sort their breakfast cereal numerically by fiber content.
07:09Excuse me, but I think we've both found that helpful at times.
07:15Come on, we should go.
07:16Hang on.
07:18What are you doing?
07:19I'm straightening up.
07:22Sheldon, this is not your home.
07:23No, this is not anyone's home.
07:24This is a swirling vortex of entropy.
07:29When the transvestite lived here, you didn't care how he kept the place.
07:32Because it was immaculate.
07:34I mean, you opened that man's closet, it was left to right evening gowns, cocktail dresses, and his police uniforms.
07:42What were you doing in his closet?
07:43I helped him run some cable for a webcam.
07:46Hey, guys.
07:47Oh, hey, honey.
07:48This just arrived.
07:48We just brought this up.
07:49Just now.
07:50Great.
07:51Was it hard getting up the stairs?
07:52No.
07:53No?
07:54No.
07:55No.
07:58We'll get out of here.
07:59Okay, great.
08:00Thank you again.
08:05Penny, I just want you to know that you don't have to live like this.
08:10I'm here for you.
08:13What's he talking about?
08:16It's a joke.
08:17I don't get it.
08:17Yeah, he didn't tell it right.
08:20Sheldon?
08:31Sheldon?
08:43Hello?
08:48Hello?
09:11Heldon!
09:13Shhh! Penny's sleeping.
09:19Are you insane?
09:21You can't just break into a woman's apartment in the middle of the night and clean?
09:24I had no choice.
09:25I couldn't sleep knowing that just outside my bedroom was our living room,
09:29and just outside our living room was that hallway,
09:31and immediately adjacent to that hallway was... this.
09:36Do you realize that if Penny wakes up, there is no reasonable explanation as to why we're here?
09:42I just gave you a reasonable explanation.
09:45No, no. You gave me an explanation.
09:47It's reasonable. This will be determined by a jury of your peers.
09:51Don't be ridiculous. I have no peers.
09:55We have to get out of here.
09:59You might want to speak in a lower register.
10:03What?
10:04Evolution has made women sensitive to high-pitched noises while they sleep,
10:08so that they'll be roused by a crying baby.
10:10If you want to avoid waking her, speak in a lower register.
10:15That's ridiculous.
10:20No?
10:22That's ridiculous.
10:27Fine.
10:29I accept your premise. Now, please, let's go.
10:33I'm not leaving until I'm done.
10:39If you have time to lean, you have time to clean.
10:46Oh, what the hell?
10:55Good morning.
10:57Good morning.
10:58Good morning.
10:59I have to say, I slept splendidly.
11:02Granted, not long, but just deeply and well.
11:05I'm not surprised.
11:07A well-known folk cure for insomnia is to break into your neighbor's apartment and clean.
11:13Sarcasm?
11:14You think?
11:16Granted, my methods may have been somewhat unorthodox,
11:19but I think the end result will be a measurable enhancement of Penny's quality of life.
11:23You know what?
11:24You convinced me.
11:24Maybe tonight we should sneak in and shampoo her carpet.
11:27You don't think that crosses a line?
11:29Yes.
11:31For God's sake, Sheldon.
11:32Do I have to hold up a sarcasm sign every time I open my mouth?
11:36You have a sarcasm sign?
11:41No, I do not have a sarcasm sign.
11:44You want some cereal?
11:45I feel so good today.
11:46I'm gonna choose from the low-fiber end of the shelf.
11:49Hello, honeypuffs.
11:51Son of a bitch!
11:54Penny's up.
11:56You sack of geeky bastards!
12:00How did she know it was us?
12:03I may have left a suggested organizational schematic for her bedroom closet.
12:08Leonard!
12:09God, this is gonna be bad.
12:10Goodbye, honeypuffs.
12:11Hello, big brand.
12:14You came into my apartment last night while I was sleeping?
12:16Yes, but only to clean.
12:18We really need more to organize.
12:19You're not actually dirty, per se.
12:21Give me back my key.
12:24I'm very, very sorry.
12:26Do you understand how creepy this is?
12:28Oh, yes, we discussed it at length last night.
12:30In my apartment while I was sleeping.
12:33And snoring.
12:34And that's probably just a sinus infection.
12:36But it could be sleep apnea.
12:38You might want to see an otolaryngologist.
12:42The throat doctor.
12:45And what kind of doctor removes shoes from asses?
12:49Depending on the depth.
12:51That's either a proctologist or a general surgeon.
13:03Oh.
13:06Good!
13:06Look, look, Penny, I think what you're feeling is perfectly valid.
13:09And maybe a little bit later today when you're feeling a little less,
13:11for lack of a better word, violated.
13:13Maybe we could talk about this some more.
13:15Stay away from me.
13:16Sure, that's another way to go.
13:18Penny, Penny, hold on.
13:20Just to clarify, because there will be a discussion when you leave.
13:25Is your objection solely to our presence in the apartment while you were sleeping?
13:30Or do you also object to the imposition of a new organizational paradigm?
13:40Well, that was a little non-responsive.
13:43You were going to march yourself over there right now and apologize.
13:51What's funny?
13:52That wasn't sarcasm?
13:55No!
13:57Boy, you are all over the place this morning.
14:03I have a master's and two PhDs. I should not have to do this.
14:08What?
14:09I am truly sorry for what happened last night.
14:12I take full responsibility.
14:14And I hope that it won't color your opinion of Leonard,
14:16who is not only a wonderful guy, but also I hear a gentle and thorough lover.
14:34I did what I could.
14:41Hey, Rush.
14:47Hey, listen.
14:49I don't know if you heard about what happened last night with Leonard and Sheldon, but I'm really upset about
14:53it.
14:53I mean, they just, they let themselves into my place and then they cleaned it.
14:57Can you even believe that? How weird is that?
14:59She's standing very close to me.
15:02Oh my, she does smell good.
15:04What is that?
15:06Vanilla?
15:06Well, I mean, you know, where I come from, if someone comes into your house at night, you shoot.
15:12Okay? And you don't shoot till wound.
15:14I mean, alright, my sister shot her husband, but it was an accident. They were drunk.
15:19What was I saying?
15:21She's so chatty.
15:23Maybe my parents are right.
15:25Maybe I'd be better off with an Indian girl.
15:27We'd have the same cultural background and my wife could sing to my children the same lalabies my mother sang
15:32to me.
15:32It's obvious that they met well, but I'm just, I'm having a really rough time. Like I said, I broke
15:37up with my boyfriend and it's freaking me out.
15:43I mean, just because most of the men I've known in my life happen to be jerks, doesn't mean I
15:48should just assume Leonard and Sheldon are. Right?
15:51She asked me a question. I should probably not.
15:57That's exactly what I thought. Thank you for listening. You're a doll.
16:02Uh-oh. Turn your pelvis.
16:18Grab a napkin, homie. You just got served.
16:24It's fine. You went.
16:27What's his problem?
16:29His imaginary girlfriend broke up with him.
16:33Been there.
16:37Hello. Sorry I'm late, but I was in the hallway chatting up Penny.
16:42Really, you. Rajesh Kuthrupali spoke to Penny.
16:46Actually, I was less the chatter than the chatty.
16:49What did she say? Is she still mad at me?
16:52Well, she was upset at first, but probably because her sister shot somebody.
16:58Then there was something about you and then she hugged me.
17:02She hugged you? How'd she hug you?
17:13Is that her perfume I smell?
17:17Intoxicating, isn't it?
17:21Intoxicating, isn't it?
17:35Hi.
17:36Oh.
17:39What's going on?
17:41Uh, here's the thing.
17:47Penny.
17:50Just as Oppenheimer came to regret his contributions to the first atomic bomb,
17:54so too I regret my participation in what was, at the very least, an error in judgment.
18:00The hallmark of the great human experiment is the willingness to recognize one's mistakes.
18:05Some mistakes, such as Madame Curie's discovery of radium, turned out to have great scientific potential
18:09even though she would later die a slow, painful death from radiation poisoning.
18:15Another example from the field of Ebola research...
18:18Leonard.
18:20Yeah?
18:23We're okay.
18:45Six two-inch dowels?
18:46Check.
18:47One package Phillips-head screws?
18:49Check.
18:49You guys, seriously, I grew up on a farm, okay?
18:51I rebuilt a tractor engine when I was like 12.
18:54I think I can put together a cheap Swedish media center.
18:56Oh, please, we insist.
18:57It's the least we can do, considering.
19:00Considering what?
19:01How great this place looks?
19:04Oh, boy, I was afraid of this.
19:06What?
19:06These instructions are a pictographic representation of the least imaginative way to assemble these components.
19:12This right here is why Sweden has no space program.
19:16Well, it looked pretty good in the store.
19:18It is an inefficient design.
19:19For example, Penny has a flat screen TV, which means all the space behind it is wasted.
19:23We could put our stereo back there.
19:25And control it how?
19:26Run an infrared repeater, photocell here, emitter here, easy peasy.
19:31Good point. How are you gonna cool it?
19:33Hey, guys, I got this.
19:34Hang on, Penny.
19:35How about fans?
19:36Here and here.
19:38Also inefficient and might be loud.
19:40How about liquid cool?
19:40Maybe a little aquarium pump here.
19:42Run some quarter-inch PVC.
19:44Guys, this is actually really simple.
19:47Hold on, honey.
19:48Men at work.
19:51PVC comes down here.
19:52Maybe a little corrugated sheet metal as a radiator here.
19:54Oh, really?
19:55Show me where we put a drip tray, a sluice, and an overflow reservoir.
19:58Hey, if water's involved, we're gonna have to ground the crap out of the thing.
20:01Guys, it's hot in here.
20:02I think I'll just take off all my clothes.
20:09Oh, I've got it.
20:12What about if we replace panels A, B, and F, and crossbar H with aircraft-grade aluminum?
20:17Oh, right! Then the entire thing's one big heat sink.
20:19Perfect. Leonard, why don't you chill and go down to the junkyard and pick up about six square meters of
20:22scrap aluminum.
20:23Raj and I'll run down to my lab and get the oxyacetylene torch.
20:25Meet back here in an hour?
20:26Done.
20:26Got it.
20:31Okay, this place does look pretty good.
20:56Mhm.
20:59But it's just the recording, but it's no kind.
21:03I can't believe it.
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