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Watch The Big Bang Theory AMZN GalaxyTV Season 2 Episode 17 online in HD on Dailymotion.
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00:00Okay, Raj. Hand me the number six torque screwdriver.
00:07Stop. We can't do this. It's not right.
00:11Sheldon, you have two choices.
00:12Either you let him put a bigger hard drive in the TiVo or you delete stuff before we go out
00:16of town.
00:16But once you open the box, you've voided the warranty.
00:20The warranty is a sacred covenant we've entered into with the manufacturer.
00:24He offers to stand by his equipment and we, in return, agree not to violate the integrity of the internal
00:29hardware.
00:30This little orange sticker is all that stands between us and anarchy.
00:36Okay, then we won't touch the hard drive. We'll just erase the first season of Battlestar.
00:43There, we're outlaws.
00:46Here you go, Leonard. Is this going to be big enough?
00:48It's perfect.
00:52For taking daffodils to your unicorn.
00:56It's just for my notebooks. Thanks, Penny.
00:58Oh, I love San Francisco. I wish I was going with you.
01:02I understand your envy. This is a can't-miss symposium.
01:05There are going to be discussions on bio-organic cellular computer devices,
01:09the advancements in multi-threaded task completion,
01:12plus a roundtable on the non-equilibrium green function approach to the photoionization process in atoms.
01:19When I go, I usually just get hammered and ride the cable cars.
01:23This conference is kind of a big thing. The keynote address is being delivered by George Smoot.
01:27Oh, my God. The George Smoot?
01:30You've heard of him.
01:31Of course I haven't.
01:34George Smoot is a Nobel Prize-winning physicist, one of the great minds of our time.
01:39His work in black body form and anisotropy of the cosmic microwave background radiation
01:43cemented our understanding of the origin of the universe.
01:47It's kind of a funny name, though.
01:49Smoot.
01:53It's like talking to a chimp.
01:57Okay, now that I've been completely insulted, have a good flight?
02:00Yeah, I wish.
02:01We're not flying. We're taking the train.
02:03Oh, cool.
02:05Yeah, cool. Seven times as long as flying and cost almost twice as much.
02:10Well, then why are you doing it?
02:12Well, we had a vote. Three of us voted for airplane, Sheldon voted for train, so we're taking the train.
02:19Don't say it like that, Leonard. Say it like, we're taking the train.
02:24Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state that nearly 14 million years ago, expansion started way around.
02:32The earth began to cool, the autotrophs began to drool, the androols developed tools, we built a wall.
02:37We built the pyramids, math, science, history unraveling the mystery that all started with a big bang.
02:49Hey, we're all going over to the Apple store to make fun of the guys at the Genius Bar. You
02:52want to come?
02:54Oh, I always enjoy that, but I'm a little busy.
02:57What are you doing?
02:58I'm simplifying the task of packing for our trip.
03:01See, by attaching RFID tags to my clothing, it will enable my laptop to read and identify the items with
03:07this wand.
03:08I will then cross-reference them against destination, anticipate activity spectrum, weather conditions, duration of trip, etc.
03:18Well, that does sound much simpler.
03:21How long is this going to take?
03:23Assuming I can keep up this pace, three hours, eleven minutes.
03:26Plus however long it takes to conclude this fairly pointless conversation.
03:31Wow.
03:32Teasing the guys at the Apple store seems a little redundant now.
03:35I don't follow.
03:37I wouldn't expect you to.
03:37I'll see you later.
03:42Socks.
03:43One pair.
03:45Cotton.
03:46Argyle.
03:47Blue.
03:52Socks.
03:53One pair.
03:54Cotton.
03:55Argyle.
03:55Blue.
04:01What on earth are you doing?
04:04Whatever it is, I'm guessing you're doing it wrong.
04:07Gentlemen, this is the Coast Starlight.
04:11One of the great American trains operating on one of the classic American routes.
04:15On this side, you'll see panoramic ocean vistas inaccessible to any other form of transportation.
04:21While on your side, you'll be treated to 350 miles of Costco's, Jiffy Lubes, and cinder block homes with above
04:28ground pools.
04:31Come on, Raj.
04:32What's wrong with Jiffy Lubes?
04:35You know?
04:38Why not?
04:39That's over the wheelbase.
04:40Are you completely unfamiliar with the suspension characteristics of a pre-1980 Pullman-built Superliner Deluxe passenger coach?
04:48Sheldon, we've been on this try 90 seconds and you've already said a thousand words.
04:52Just tell us where to sit and shut up.
04:57Here.
04:59I'm hoping once you reap the endorphic rewards of the steady clickety-clack of steel wheels on polished rails, your
05:05sour disposition will abate.
05:07Yeah, maybe.
05:08Meanwhile, back in the 21st century, people are raising their tray tables and putting their seatbacks in an upright position
05:13because it's time to land in San Francisco.
05:17It's not so bad, really.
05:18At least these trains have modern plumbing.
05:20In India, you squat over a hole in the train and expose your naked buttocks to the chilly air of
05:25Rajasthan.
05:26He is referring, of course, to third class on Indian Railway's magnificent Rhanakpur Express and his 1,200-kilometer journey
05:33from Maharashtra to the Beacon or Junction.
05:36Oh, look.
05:37Now he's boring on an international scale.
05:41Holy crap.
05:42Look.
05:45Is that who I think it is?
05:46It can't be.
05:48What would Summer Glow be doing riding the train?
05:50Maybe John Connor's aboard and she's protecting him from an evil Terminator.
05:55Unlikely.
05:55That's a television show, Leonard.
06:00Of course, if Skydead actually did exist in the future, a perfect way to infiltrate and destroy mankind would be
06:05to send Terminators back posing as actors who have played Terminators in popular films and television series,
06:10lulling us into a false sense of security, i.e. that's Summer Glow from the Sarah Connor Chronicles.
06:15No, Summer.
06:16Don't kill me.
06:16I'm pro-robot.
06:21At least he's off the train, crap.
06:28Sheldon, I owe you an apology.
06:30Taking the train was a stroke of brilliance.
06:32I've actually got a shot at a Terminator.
06:34Oh, please.
06:35When it comes to Terminators, you've got a better shot of scoring with Arnold Schwarzenegger.
06:41You're overlooking something.
06:43I have 11 hours with her in a confined space.
06:48Unless she's willing to jump off a moving train, tuck and roll down the side of a hill, she will
06:53eventually succumb to the acquired taste that is Howard Wallowicz.
07:01My money's on tuck and roll.
07:04I'm confused.
07:05I thought you were involved in some sort of socially intimate pairing with Leslie Winkle.
07:10Sheldon, let me explain to you how this works.
07:13All right.
07:14That's Summer Glow.
07:16Yes.
07:17That's it.
07:20Hang on a sec.
07:21Why do you get first cracker tour?
07:23Uh, well, let's see.
07:24A couple reasons.
07:24One, I saw her first.
07:26No, you didn't.
07:27I did.
07:28Fair enough.
07:29But then let me move on to number two.
07:31Unlike you, I can actually talk to women when I'm sober.
07:35You fail to take into account that even mute, I am foreign and exotic, while you, on the other hand,
07:41are frail and pasty.
07:44Well, you know the old saying, pasty and frail never fail.
07:52Excuse me, but what about me?
07:54Why don't I get a shot?
07:56Fine.
07:56Go ahead.
07:57Take a shot.
08:00You know, I've already got a gorgeous blonde back home that I can't score with.
08:04I think, oh, why don't you two take this one?
08:06Sheldon, is there a place in this train to get alcohol?
08:08Interesting that you ask.
08:10The Coast Starlight recently added the refurbished Pacific Parlor car, built in 1956 and originally known as the Santa Fe
08:16lounge car.
08:17The lower level...
08:18Yeah, yeah, yeah, which way?
08:19The upper level is a bar that offers wine tastings if you're going as far as Portland.
08:24So, aren't you going to go talk to her?
08:25Well, I'm just working on my opening line.
08:28She's probably heard every possible line, Howard.
08:30Why don't you just try hello?
08:32No, no, no.
08:32That always creeps girls out.
08:35I need to come up with something that's funny, smart, and delicately suggest that my sexual endowment is disproportionate to
08:42my physical stature.
08:44You're going to need more than 11 hours.
08:48Oh, no.
08:49What's the matter?
08:50I forgot my flash drive.
08:52So?
08:53So we have to go back.
08:55Okay, Sheldon, I'm going to say why, and your answer cannot be because I forgot my flash drive.
09:01You don't understand.
09:03My flash drive has my paper on astrophysical probes of M-theory effects in the early universe that I was
09:08going to give to George Smoot at the conference.
09:10Why do you have to give your paper to George Smoot?
09:13It's brilliant.
09:14He needs to read it.
09:17So you'll send him an email when we get back?
09:19Oh, then I won't get to see his face light up as he reads it.
09:23Right, of course.
09:24Oh, this is an unmitigated disaster.
09:26Well, there's nothing you can do about it, so relax.
09:29Sit back, enjoy the clickety-clack of the steel wheels on the polished rails.
09:37You forgot your flash drive.
09:39You forgot your flash drive.
09:40You forgot your flash drive.
09:42You forgot your flash drive.
09:43You forgot your flash drive.
09:44You forgot your flash drive.
09:45Only 10 hours, 55 minutes to go.
09:48You forgot your flash drive.
09:50You forgot your flash drive.
09:57It's hot in here.
09:58It must be summer.
10:12So, where are you gals headed?
10:16Okay, I found the perfect solution.
10:18We get off the train to the next stop in Oxnard.
10:21We then take the 113 train back to Union Station.
10:24We take a cab back to the apartment, get my flash drive, and then race to San Luis Obispo,
10:29where, assuming the lights are with us and minimal traffic, we'll meet the train.
10:32I've got a better idea.
10:34Are you going to be sarcastic?
10:36Well, you take all the fun out of it for me.
10:39Look, Penny's home.
10:40Why don't we just call her, have her go in the apartment, get your flash drive, and email you the
10:44paper?
10:44But the flash drive is in a locked drawer in my desk.
10:47So?
10:47The key is hidden in my room.
10:49So?
10:50Penny would have to go into my room.
10:51So?
10:52The people don't go in my room.
10:55I see.
10:55Well, it seems, once again, you're caught between a rock and a crazy place.
11:02Oh, I hate when that happens.
11:06It's hot in here.
11:07Must be summer.
11:07It's hot in here.
11:08Must be summer.
11:09It's hot in here.
11:10Must be summer.
11:11It's hot in here.
11:12Must be summer.
11:15That's cute.
11:16Really?
11:17I just made it up.
11:19Have you seen Slumdog Millionaire?
11:23Oh, yeah.
11:23I loved it.
11:24It's loosely based on my life.
11:29Yeah, we're putting the play on for one night in this little 99-seat theater.
11:33Can you come?
11:34Oh, great.
11:35Do you know 98 other people that might want to come?
11:39Oh, hang on.
11:40Hello?
11:41Listen carefully.
11:42I'm about to give you a set of instructions, which you must follow to the letter.
11:46Just a sec.
11:47The theater's above a bowling alley, so it's a little noisy, but it might be the only chance I'll ever
11:52get to play Anne Frank.
11:54And the director is brilliant.
11:56He uses the bowling sounds as, like, Nazi artillery.
12:00Okay, great.
12:00I'll see you then.
12:02Hello?
12:02Okay, step four.
12:05Do you see that small plastic case on my dresser?
12:09Your dresser?
12:10Who is this?
12:11It's Sheldon.
12:12Oh, hey, Sheldon.
12:14How's San Francisco?
12:15I'm not in San Francisco.
12:17I'm on a trip.
12:17Were you even listening to me?
12:19Uh, no.
12:20I was talking to my friend.
12:21But what's up?
12:21What's up?
12:22I'll tell you what's up.
12:23I'm in a crisis situation, and I need you to marshal your powers of concentration, limited as they may be.
12:28Give me the phone.
12:32Hi, Penny.
12:33It's Leonard.
12:33Hey, Leonard.
12:34What's going on with Dr. Whackadoodle?
12:37He's calling to ask you a favor.
12:39You might be confused because he didn't use the words, Penny, Sheldon, please, or favor.
12:44Okay.
12:45Enough chit-chat.
12:47Okay, step one.
12:48Locate your emergency key to our apartment.
12:51Step two.
12:52Enter our apartment.
12:53Step three.
12:56Enter my bedroom.
12:58Step four.
12:59No, hang on, Sheldon.
13:00Get another call.
13:01Get out!
13:02Leonard, let me tell you something.
13:04Personal robots cannot get here soon enough.
13:09And that bright little star peeking her head out early today, that's Venus.
13:15That is so cool.
13:17You really know a lot about space.
13:19Come on.
13:20When you were on TV in Firefly, you were actually in space.
13:26You're not one of those guys who really believe that, are you?
13:29You mean one of the hopeless geeks?
13:31No.
13:32Those are crazy people.
13:36Howard, be a dear and get me another one of these.
13:45Allow him.
13:46He's one of those geeks.
13:49All right.
13:50Now, before you enter my bedroom unescorted, I need you to understand that this one-time
13:54grant of access does not create a permanent easement.
13:59Easement.
14:02It's a legal right of access.
14:03Good grief.
14:07What?
14:07No.
14:08Don't put me on hold.
14:09Oh!
14:12Do you believe him?
14:14Normally around women, he has the personality of a boiled potato.
14:18Put one beer on him and he's M. Night Charm-A-Larm-A-Lon.
14:25Is that what he's drinking?
14:26It's not even real beer.
14:28What?
14:28Look at it.
14:29Not alcoholic beer.
14:33What's going on?
14:34I don't know.
14:35Some sort of placebo effect, I guess.
14:39Placebo, you say.
14:41Interesting.
14:43Yes, I'm still here.
14:44Where am I going?
14:45I'm on a train.
14:46Now, what you'll be looking for is a small wooden box located between a Hoberman sphere
14:51and a sample of quartz flecked with pyrite.
14:55Hoberman sphere.
14:57It's a collapsible icoside dodecahedron.
15:01No, the thing with the time on it is my alarm clock.
15:07Actually, in India, the names of constellations are different.
15:11Where you have the big dipper, we have the big curry pot.
15:16You're making that up.
15:17You got me.
15:19Now, what are you going to do with me?
15:26Raj?
15:27Yes?
15:27Look.
15:28What am I looking at?
15:29You tell me.
15:31Non-alcoholic beer, yeah?
15:41Hi.
15:41I'm the small package good things come in.
15:48Okay, I got a box, but there's no key in here.
15:51Just letters.
15:52That's the wrong box.
15:53Put it back.
15:53Oh, Sheldon, are these letters from your grandmother?
15:56Don't read those letters.
15:58Oh, look, she calls you Moon Pie.
16:00That is so cute.
16:01Put down the letters!
16:06Hey, Penny, it's Leonard.
16:08Hey, Leonard.
16:09How's the train ride?
16:10Delightful.
16:12Listen, I don't know what you're doing right now,
16:14but there are little bubbles forming in the corner of Sheldon's mouth.
16:17Okay, yeah, I kind of crossed a line.
16:19Put him back on.
16:23I'm back.
16:23What up, Moon Pie?
16:26No one calls me Moon Pie, but me more.
16:31Hey, Penny, Leonard again.
16:35So anyway, in the dream, you and I were ice skating, just the two of us,
16:39and then I picked you up by your ankles
16:41and twirled you round and round until your legs tore off.
16:47I mean, I tried to stick him back on, but before I could,
16:51you turned into a giant loaf of pumpernickel bread.
16:56What do you think that means?
16:59I really don't know.
17:02I'll give you a little clue.
17:04My favorite sandwich is salami on pumpernickel.
17:08Is that so?
17:10And did you know the word pumpernickel comes from the German words pumper and nickel,
17:14which loosely translates to fart goblin?
17:19No, I didn't.
17:24Okay, I found the box.
17:26Now what?
17:26You're holding a Japanese puzzle box, which takes ten precise moves to open.
17:32First, locate the panel with the diamond pattern
17:35and slide the center portion one millimeter to the left.
17:39Then, on the opposite end of the box,
17:42slide the entire panel down two millimeters.
17:45You'll hear a slight click.
17:47Hang on, Sheldon, do you have any emotional attachment to this box?
17:51No, it's a novelty I ordered off the internet.
17:53Did you hear the click?
17:54Not yet.
17:59There it is.
18:04Okay, here's another one.
18:06If you married the famous rock guitarist Johnny Winter,
18:10you'd be Summer Winter.
18:14Uh-huh.
18:15Yeah.
18:17Okay, I'm gonna just go for broke here and say I like you.
18:22Yeah?
18:24So, here's my question.
18:26Do you realistically see any conversational path
18:28that would take us from where we are right now
18:30to a place where I could ask you out and you'd say yes?
18:34No.
18:38Fair enough.
18:39I'll leave you in peace.
18:44But before I go,
18:47would you mind if I just take one picture of us together
18:50from my Facebook page?
18:52Sure.
19:02Okay, great.
19:04Now, can I take one where it looks like we're making out?
19:08Okay.
19:09Now, you're going to insert the flash drive into the USB port.
19:18She calls me Moon Pie because I'm nummy nummy
19:21and she could just eat me up.
19:25Now, please, put the flash drive in the USB port.
19:31The one that looks like a little duck's mouth.
19:36Hey, how'd it go?
19:38Terminator broke my phone.
19:45Excuse me.
19:49Okay, I'll be honest with you.
19:50I've just spent the last two hours
19:52imagining various scenarios in my head,
19:54trying to come up with some clever line to say to you,
19:56but then I finally realized you're a human being,
19:59I'm a human being.
20:00I could just say to you...
20:02I'm sorry, this is me.
20:07Hi, my name's Leonard.
20:12So I'm thinking,
20:13you won the Nobel Prize, what, three years ago?
20:15So you must deal with a whole lot of
20:17what has Smoot done lately.
20:20My thought is,
20:21we continue my research as a team,
20:24you know, Cooper, Smoot, alphabetical,
20:26and when we win the Nobel Prize,
20:28you'll be back on top.
20:30With all due respect, Dr. Cooper,
20:33are you on crack?
20:38Fine, Smoot Cooper.
20:40Wow, what a diva.
21:09I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
21:09I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
21:09I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
21:10I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
21:10I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry,
21:10I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I
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