- 2 days ago
S1E9
Category
🎥
Short filmTranscript
00:04Mrs. Gibson?
00:07Mrs. Gibson, the last time I saw you, you were driving the school bus.
00:10Do you remember me?
00:12Remember? How are you, Becky?
00:16I'm Ellen, but if I see Becky, I'll say hi.
00:20Ellen, right.
00:22Yeah, actually, I'm still here.
00:24I've been driving the bus for 45 years.
00:26Wow, that's a lot of rubber bands to the back of the head.
00:312,200, last spring.
00:36You don't remember me.
00:38Ellen, Ellen Richmond.
00:40You drove me from the time I was in elementary school.
00:42I wore raincoats all the time, even when it didn't rain.
00:45For a couple reasons, actually, because I look great in yellow,
00:48which is why I took the school bus, by the way.
00:50I guess I could have taken the yellow cap, but all we have is checkered here,
00:53and, you know, checks make me look fat.
00:55So, ironically, I ran a dot-com business for a while
00:58and received some pretty fat checks.
01:00Most of those went into buying yellow outfits, though.
01:04Before you know it, I was in the red, and, you know,
01:06red makes everyone look fat.
01:08But, you know, a little secret.
01:09Santa Claus, 120 pounds.
01:12And number two...
01:13Wait a minute.
01:14I do remember you.
01:17And you decided.
01:19On a bus, you sit forwards.
01:22On a train, you face backwards.
01:26Let me ask you something.
01:28Are you annoyed by the fact that you're trained in math problems and not buses?
01:36Young lady, do you see that sign,
01:38Do Not Distract Driver?
01:41Oh, yeah, I see that.
01:43You see one that says stop?
01:47Apparently not.
01:52You were responsible for the only traffic ticket of my whole career.
01:55That's right.
01:56That's right.
01:57You got the ticket for running the stop sign.
01:59Yeah, and they suspended me for two weeks.
02:01Well, a lot of that was over Thanksgiving,
02:03so technically you only missed how many days?
02:05Eight.
02:07Lucky me.
02:08I got to go back to work on my birthday.
02:10I'm sorry about that.
02:11Did I ever say I'm sorry?
02:11You said so many things.
02:13It was probably in there somewhere.
02:16Hey, so Thanksgiving,
02:17that means you have a birthday coming up.
02:19Yes.
02:19Yes, and I'm giving myself a present right now.
02:25I wonder what it's going to be.
02:48I wonder what it's going to be.
03:01I just saw Miss Gibson.
03:03Hey, you know, it's her birthday coming up.
03:04I think we should do something for her.
03:05You're going to have a hard time getting Munn to approve that.
03:08Teachers were lying about their birthdays for the free cake,
03:11so we banned parties.
03:13Plus, I did sort of clock them with that pinata bat on my last birthday.
03:18Well, that's a risky run when you're blindfolded.
03:21No, I wasn't blindfolded.
03:24Hey, Pam.
03:25Hey, uh.
03:26Hey, listen.
03:27Have any ideas on how I could bake a spectacular cake?
03:31Well, if you're going to bake it,
03:32I'd let go of spectacular right now.
03:37But that's why I'm here.
03:39So, what sort of cake would you like me to bake?
03:41Oh, no.
03:42Actually, I would like to bake it myself.
03:44See, it's for a woman that I...
03:45I understand.
03:48No, I don't think you do.
03:49I just wanted to get some tips on how to make a cake that looks like a school bus.
03:52Short bus or long bus?
03:54Just sort of a cake.
03:55Diesel or gas?
03:56Actually, I just wanted to...
03:57Sliding windows or pop-out?
03:59I didn't realize there were so many...
04:01No, you didn't.
04:04So why don't I just bake the cake?
04:06Because it's better if I bake it, actually.
04:08Maybe I'll just make a steering wheel.
04:10Horn or no horn?
04:11That's enough, Ken.
04:14Here it is.
04:15Here's Miss Gibson's file.
04:18It is her birthday.
04:20Look at that.
04:21She was born the same year as my mom.
04:231936.
04:23Eh, that would make them the same age.
04:28I don't have a calculator on me,
04:29so I'm going to have to take your word for it.
04:35Well, if it changes color again,
04:37go see the nurse.
04:41Hey, Mr. Munn.
04:42Hi.
04:43Listen, I know you've been burned
04:44by birthday parties in the past.
04:46Uh, no.
04:47Actually, struck was what happened.
04:50I'm so sorry my head wasn't full of Tootsie Rolls.
04:54Hey, listen.
04:55I found Miss Gibson's file,
04:56and it's her birthday.
04:57See, here on Friday,
04:58I think we should give her a party.
04:59Oh, my.
05:01Yes.
05:01I didn't realize that was this Friday.
05:04Well, of course.
05:04Absolutely.
05:05We must throw her a party.
05:07Okay, Mr. Munn,
05:07this is very important to me.
05:08There's no need to be sarcastic.
05:11Ellen, he isn't being sarcastic.
05:13He isn't?
05:14Were you just being sarcastic?
05:15No.
05:19See, he wasn't.
05:21He wasn't?
05:22You weren't being sarcastic just now
05:23when you went,
05:23No.
05:25Well, what do you think?
05:28I don't know what to think.
05:29Actually, neither do I now.
05:32Are you being sincere
05:33when you say she can have a party?
05:35No, I'm being sarcastic.
05:40Okay, I don't know if you're being sarcastic
05:41about being sarcastic
05:42or genuinely sarcastic,
05:43but I'm throwing Mrs. Gibson a party.
05:45My head hurts.
05:47Really?
05:49Well, then, happy birthday.
05:59Ellen, you made a cake?
06:00As a matter of fact, I did.
06:02I was going for a school bus theme.
06:05Well, you got the seat cushion right.
06:09And now, this one I bought,
06:11I'm just refrosting it to look homemade.
06:15This is the one that I tried to bake.
06:19Took a wrong turn somewhere in the egg area
06:21because what I ended up with
06:22is a saffron risotto
06:24with just a hint of emergency exit door.
06:28Good luck.
06:36See, I've never thought
06:37the tinfoil was that funny.
06:39Oh, no.
06:40I was laughing at Kitty.
06:41She's a corker.
06:44All you have to do
06:44is give Kitty a bowl of tinfoil.
06:46She can entertain herself for hours.
06:49See, I get bored
06:50after about 15 or 20 minutes of that.
06:53Where is Kitty?
06:54Oh, please.
06:55Where isn't Kitty?
06:57Another good question.
06:57I've never seen the cat.
06:59Oh.
07:02She's a shy one.
07:03Always hiding underneath my bed
07:05or the couch.
07:06I even found her in the hamper once.
07:08Yeah, half the time
07:09you don't even know she's there.
07:10Yeah, all the time
07:11I don't know she's there.
07:14Well, you have quite the busy schedule, dear.
07:16Don't put this all on Kitty.
07:18Yeah, I really should hang out
07:19in the hamper more.
07:22That's a fantastic school bus,
07:24by the way.
07:34Oh, look.
07:36Ellen brought a store-bought cake
07:38and tried to alter the icing
07:39to make it look homemade.
07:44Well, I had a feeling
07:45you'd buy one too small,
07:47so I put together
07:48a little something myself.
07:49You're going to make this
07:50into a competition, aren't you?
07:51No, there's no competition, Ellen.
07:55Ta-da!
08:04Surprise!
08:05And someone called
08:06the surprise.
08:07Who did this?
08:09I think all credit for this one
08:11has to go to Ellen.
08:15Oh, look, there's a cake for me.
08:19Yes, Pam made a cake.
08:21Or as we like to think of it,
08:23a desperate cry for help.
08:26I have completely moved.
08:30Okay, everybody.
08:33This is an auspicious occasion,
08:35so I would like to say
08:37a few words
08:38about our good friend,
08:39Mrs. Gibson.
08:41What do we know
08:42about Mrs. Gibson?
08:44Mrs. Gibson.
08:58This is ridiculous.
08:59I'll do it.
09:00We all know Mrs. Gibson,
09:01or should.
09:03Without Mrs. Gibson,
09:04a lot of us would not be here
09:05at school.
09:07She's been our bus driver
09:08for 45 years,
09:09and what a job that is.
09:10I mean, to pick up the kids
09:12at home in the morning
09:13and drop them off at school
09:15and then pick them up
09:16from school in the afternoon
09:17and drop them off at home
09:18and then the next morning
09:19pick them up at home
09:20and drop them off at school
09:22and at the end of the day
09:23pick them up at school
09:23and drop them off at home
09:24and then, you know,
09:25have a Saturday and Sunday off
09:26and then Monday morning
09:26pick them up at home
09:27and then I'm doing it again.
09:30I guess I just want to say
09:31thank you for all that you've done
09:33and then you have
09:33a wonderful birthday.
09:35So, thanks for all the hard work
09:37and enjoy your retirement.
09:39Yes.
09:40So long, farewell,
09:42awesome, and thank you for all right
09:43I hate you, no, I hate you.
09:47What are you doing?
09:48And why are you doing it in German?
09:51You're asking me to retire?
09:54No, it's her birthday.
09:56She's not retiring.
09:56Yes, it's her birthday.
09:57She's 65 years young today
09:59and the insurance premiums
10:01just go right through the roof
10:03after that.
10:03That's why the school board
10:05makes it mandatory.
10:06Well, how did anyone know
10:07my age at all
10:09even that it was my birthday?
10:12Well, I think you have Ellen
10:13to thank for that.
10:17Thank you, Ellen.
10:20Were you just being sarcastic?
10:30Do you taste the muffler?
10:34Wait till you get a mouthful
10:35of tailpipe.
10:37I can't believe you're retiring
10:39Mrs. Gibson.
10:40Well, she is on a pension.
10:42In fact, she's put in
10:43so many years,
10:44she's actually getting
10:45more money not to work.
10:46She is?
10:47Mm-hmm.
10:48Man, what I wouldn't give
10:49to fast forward
10:50through the next 25 years
10:51and get some of that free money.
10:55I don't know, now I feel like
10:56she thinks I'm responsible
10:57for this.
10:58She didn't seem too happy.
10:59What are you talking about?
11:00You heard her say
11:01she wanted to drive
11:02across the country.
11:03Yeah, I mean,
11:04it's not a giant pension,
11:05so she might not be able
11:07to go across a long way,
11:08but, you know, up and down.
11:13Look, we can all take turns
11:15with the driving.
11:16I mean, we're really still
11:18one of the only school systems
11:19in the area that has
11:20a full-time driver anyway.
11:22I mean, it's really
11:23just a waste of money.
11:24No, it's not a waste of money.
11:26It's routine and stability.
11:28These kids need to know
11:29that when they get
11:29on the bus every morning
11:30and that door opens,
11:31there's the same smiling face
11:33there to greet them,
11:33to say,
11:34how are you today?
11:34Or tell me about yourself.
11:36Or in my case,
11:36shh.
11:40A bus driver should be
11:41someone who cares,
11:42someone that they can relate to.
11:50One.
12:16Excuse me.
12:26Hey, here's a little phrase
12:28you might want to remember
12:28for next time.
12:30There's my house.
12:32There goes my house.
12:35We forgot to go to my house.
12:36Any of these?
12:38We forgot to go to my house.
12:45See, he's got it.
12:53So how's the new job?
12:54I hate it.
12:55Thanks for asking.
12:57It's all my fault.
12:57I'm trying to do something nice
12:58for Miss Gips
12:59and I end up getting her retired.
13:01My arms are killing me.
13:02You know how many corners
13:03we have in this town?
13:06Well, if you're going to be up
13:07this early,
13:08maybe you can take over
13:09feeding Kitty for me.
13:10Have you seen this cat?
13:13It's been a while, I guess.
13:14What does she look like?
13:15She's a tabby.
13:17I think.
13:20Look, just put the food outside.
13:22She's shy.
13:22It takes her a while
13:23to get to know you.
13:24Yeah.
13:24When did we get Kitty again?
13:261988.
13:29How do you think
13:30she got her name?
13:31I thought it had something
13:32to do with being a Kitty.
13:34Oh, no.
13:35We named her after
13:36Kitty Dukakis.
13:40I don't know why
13:41I didn't just assume that.
13:43There you are.
13:44There you are.
13:47Where were you all night?
13:49Well, my feet were cold,
13:50you fuzzy little thing.
13:52Mom?
13:53Mom, can I pet her?
13:59You want to pet my slipper?
14:03You okay, honey?
14:09There's no Kitty.
14:11Those are pretty strong words, Ellen.
14:14Maybe we had a cat once,
14:15but I've been back a few months
14:16and I haven't seen anything
14:17and I didn't want to say
14:19anything to anyone,
14:20but I opened the freezer
14:20the other day
14:21and there was a bag
14:22of garbage in there.
14:23My mom freezes the trash.
14:25Oh.
14:27Well, that would explain
14:28why the garbage men
14:30press the bags up
14:30against their face
14:31in the summer.
14:34She does that
14:35so it doesn't smell.
14:36Okay, well then
14:37how do you explain
14:37when I opened the dishwasher
14:38the other day?
14:39It's like she's storing
14:39sodas in there.
14:41No, she runs them
14:41through the short cycle
14:42to sanitize the tops.
14:47That would explain
14:48my scalding hot
14:49Diet Coke
14:50the other day.
14:52Just do what I do.
14:53Just drop them
14:54in the trash
14:54and then you can
14:55take them out
14:55of the freezer
14:55the next day.
15:03My point is
15:04that mom is getting older.
15:05What are you saying?
15:05That mom's losing it?
15:06Because she's not.
15:07Her mind is as sharp
15:08as it's ever been.
15:09I know you meant
15:10that to be comforting,
15:11but it really isn't.
15:13Look, I'm just saying
15:14that maybe she's
15:15imagining things,
15:16you know?
15:16I mean, the next thing
15:17we know,
15:18she's going to look
15:18outside and say
15:19the bus is gone.
15:21Why would she say that?
15:24Because the bus is gone.
15:25I parked the bus out there
15:26and now it's not there.
15:27Who would take a bus?
15:28Well, maybe you forgot
15:29where you put it.
15:30Oh, maybe I should
15:30check the nightstand.
15:33Oh, my God.
15:35Something horrible
15:35has happened.
15:36I know.
15:37Kitty's gone.
15:37Kitty's gone?
15:38What are you talking about?
15:39How can you even tell?
15:39The bus is gone.
15:42Did you look
15:43under the sofa?
15:44No, but I would
15:44remember driving
15:45through the front door.
15:47For Kitty.
15:48Kitty's gone.
15:50Catherine,
15:51calm Mom down.
15:51I've got a crisis
15:52going on here.
15:53Mom?
15:55Have a beer.
15:57Those aren't clean.
15:58I'm waiting for a full load.
16:00Ellen,
16:01you've got to get
16:02on that bus of yours
16:03and drive around
16:03and look for Kitty.
16:04You're not listening
16:05to me.
16:06The bus is gone.
16:09Oh, my God.
16:10Yes.
16:11Kitty must have
16:12been on it.
16:15Let's go find her.
16:16Mom, I don't have time.
16:17I've got to use
16:18my own car
16:18to get these kids
16:19to school.
16:20Where are my car keys?
16:21They're on the bird feeder.
16:22Let's go.
16:32I bet you Kitty's
16:33been hanging around
16:33with that Persian
16:34over on Elm.
16:37That cat thinks
16:38he is God's gift.
16:40Isn't that what
16:41all cats think?
16:43Team, hey,
16:44you know what?
16:45It hurts a lot more
16:46when you're eight inches away.
16:49Oh, flip a ewey.
16:50I think I saw something
16:51behind the Farm Fresh door.
16:53I can't.
16:54I've got a route
16:54to stick to.
16:55Let's crank some tunes.
16:56No one's cranking
16:57any tunes.
16:58Yeah!
16:58Kitty, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty,
16:59Kitty, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty,
17:00Kitty, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty.
17:02Yeah!
17:02Kitty, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty,
17:03Kitty, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty,
17:05Kitty, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty, Kitty.
17:06What do you want to hear?
17:07Some Limp Bizkit?
17:07Tools?
17:08Stained?
17:09Loud static?
17:10How about I just
17:10lay on the horn?
17:17Ellen?
17:18Oh, hi, Mr. Munch.
17:19In my 30 years
17:21at this school,
17:22we have lost
17:221,200 basketball games,
17:24600 football games,
17:26most of our...
17:27No, every track meet.
17:28But I must say,
17:30this is the first bus
17:31we have ever lost.
17:33Now, thanks to you,
17:35we can't even get
17:35our loser teams
17:36to the games
17:37they're going to lose.
17:39And how do you think
17:40the teachers feel
17:41about the empty classrooms?
17:42Hey, Ellen,
17:43I got a free day.
17:44Harry Potter,
17:44here I come.
17:48It wasn't my fault.
17:50I went to pick
17:50the kids up,
17:51but they weren't
17:51at their stops.
17:52Oh, well,
17:52here come the
17:53little hellions now.
17:55Aw, crap!
18:08Miss Gibson?
18:11Come on,
18:11Miss Gibson.
18:12Please?
18:17You caught me.
18:18What are you going to do now,
18:19call the cops?
18:21My record is already
18:22bad enough because of you.
18:24I'm not going to call the cops.
18:27Why'd you take the bus?
18:29Because you took the bus.
18:30You took it from me.
18:33This is my job,
18:34and I don't care
18:35what some piece of paper
18:37or insurance document says.
18:39I'm good at my job,
18:41and I love my job.
18:42I had no intention
18:43of trying to take your job.
18:45I really was just trying
18:46to be thoughtful
18:46and considerate.
18:47You drove right over my heart,
18:50and you didn't even signal.
18:55If that's not a country song,
18:56it really should be.
19:00I know you're upset,
19:02but at the party,
19:02you acted so happy,
19:03and so you look forward
19:05to being with your husband
19:06and traveling.
19:06I just spent my first full day
19:09with Mr. Gibson
19:09since 1958.
19:12That's enough to last me
19:13another 20 years.
19:16Oh, I mean,
19:17I love the man dearly,
19:18but he has absolutely
19:19nothing to say.
19:21Oh, God.
19:22I hate that.
19:23People have nothing to say.
19:25I think mainly
19:26because of that expression,
19:27if you don't have anything
19:27nice to say,
19:28then don't say anything at all.
19:30So when somebody's
19:30not saying anything,
19:31I'm thinking to myself,
19:32what kind of mean things
19:33is this person thinking
19:33that they're not saying?
19:35Do you know what I'm saying?
19:39See, like right now,
19:40you're not saying anything,
19:41so, you know,
19:42what am I supposed
19:42to think you're thinking?
19:44I'd rather not say.
19:47Look, I know
19:48in your own destructive way
19:50you're trying to be nice.
19:52I'm not ready to retire, okay?
19:55It's not fair that people
19:56judge you just because
19:57of your age.
20:00Excuse me, Al.
20:03Maybe I'm losing it.
20:04Kitty?
20:05Kitty?
20:06Kitty?
20:07Well,
20:08Mom really does have a cat.
20:14You know what I'm going to do?
20:15I am going to find out
20:16how much that extra insurance is,
20:18and I'm going to talk
20:18to Mr. Munner.
20:19We're going to find the money
20:20in the budget
20:20to keep you driving this bus
20:21because you love it,
20:23and more importantly,
20:25I hate it.
20:27I really appreciate this.
20:29I've got to tell you,
20:31I miss those damn kids.
20:33I think I've saved
20:34every rubber band
20:35that was ever fired
20:36at the back of my head.
20:38Oh, then these came for you
20:40while you were out.
20:53You'll never guess
20:54who's in here.
20:55Mrs. Gibson.
20:57No, but you're way off.
20:58Hello, dear.
21:01Oh, yeah.
21:02I invited her over
21:03for a hot cup of Coke.
21:06Come in.
21:07I found Kitty.
21:08She was on the bus.
21:09Oh, that's great.
21:10Yeah.
21:13Hello, Dot.
21:15Connie.
21:16It's been a long time.
21:18Well, some things
21:18are hard to forget.
21:20Like recipes
21:21for prize-winning pies.
21:24Unless you came up
21:25with that extra cup
21:26of currants on your own.
21:29You're not the only person
21:30in town who gets Red Book.
21:35Okay, I think you're both
21:36a little hopped up
21:37on Centrum Silver.
21:37Let's dial it back.
21:40Great news.
21:40Kitty's back.
21:41I know.
21:42Can you believe it?
21:43She was in the old hamper
21:44in the garage.
21:44I just gave her some milk.
21:46I thought you said
21:46she was in the carrier.
21:47She is.
21:47Look.
21:48Oh, that's not Kitty.
21:50Hey, come here, girl.
21:51Kitty, Kitty, Kitty.
21:52Well, if it's not Kitty,
21:54then who is it?
21:55I don't know,
21:55but whoever it is,
21:56you're scared off Kitty.
21:59Kitty.
22:01Kitty.
22:05Kitty.
22:05Kitty.
22:07Kitty.
22:07Kitty.
22:22Thanks.
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