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00:13Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
00:51Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:06Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:09Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:14Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:16Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:21Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:24Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:29Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:31Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:33Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:37Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:46Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
01:57Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
02:27Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
02:54Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
02:56Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
03:09Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
03:11Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
03:23Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
03:35Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
03:38Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
04:08Vous aimez les hamburgers, et quand les équipes de l'équipe de l'équipe
04:11s'il vous plaît ?
04:13Je vous ai !
04:14J'ai presque comme les retiers de l'équipe
04:16avec des bandannes de red !
04:18Wowie !
04:21Careful !
04:22Nous sommes-nous en train de faire ça ou quoi ?
04:23C'est un sonata avec un Dr. Who sticker qui est juste pour ça !
04:27Nous sommes-nous en train de faire ça !
04:28Les headsets sont, tout le monde !
04:33Wow ! Vagasy !
04:35Ils ont vraiment capturé la gross !
04:38How do I not move ?
04:42Ladies and gentlemen,
04:44The Las Vegas Board of Human Resources presents to you
04:47A computerized amalgamation of all five personalities of the Rat Pack
04:52The King Prince of the Board
04:54Old Blue Glass Joey Bishop-Eyes himself
04:57Rocco Prosecco !
04:59Oh, she'll write you up just for cracking wires
05:02There's no quid for quo, just some forms to sign
05:07Oh, my lady, H.R.
05:11Fresh and liquor crowd here tonight
05:13I'd like to hear your feedback on my performance
05:17What button did you hit for that ?
05:19Oh, never mind, found it !
05:21If you're like me, you're probably wondering
05:22Why must Rocco exist ?
05:24You see, folks, there never was a more toxic work family than the Rat Pack
05:29So now it's members' consciousness to live between death and life inside a computer
05:33Singing songs to you good people
05:37Oh, it's short for home run, but you can't go all the way
05:40Oh, my lady, H.R.
05:46Why is everything we do always so high-concept and wacky ?
05:50Why wouldn't it be ?
05:51Tonight, old Rocco is gonna stress test your workplace for toxicity
05:54Let's start with some Rat Pack theme day short trivia
05:59On a set of Ocean's Eleven, Frank Sinatra had his whole team hang Louis' milestone out of a 14-story
06:06window
06:07When he tried to give more lies to Angie Dickinson
06:09How good do you feel your team is at handling unexpected challenges ?
06:14I think we manage pretty well
06:15Ten out of ten, can we be done now ?
06:17I should be out there rioting, like, you know, whichever nationality you're best at rioting
06:21Here are my guesses
06:23Oh, gotta cut off that racial tirade and dock your two boys, baby
06:27How about the rest of you ?
06:29You kooky cats run a humane workplace ?
06:31I'm new here, but so far everybody seems pretty respectful
06:35Okay, well, doesn't seem very respectful to not tell your employees about some new guy you hired without their input
06:41Can we not do this right now ?
06:43I thought you'd be happy I brought someone in to pick up your slack
06:46What's slack ? We're always busy
06:48Maybe, if you didn't keep working with every maniac off the street
06:52Actually, this program can generate clip-like simulations again as it is your efforts
06:57Good, because I can think of several incredibly visual examples
07:02I accidentally bought the kind of car that runs over my brother whenever he pisses me off
07:06We need to sue Toyota and we need to sue my brother
07:10We can help you
07:12I want to sue my own penis
07:13We'll take him down
07:15So the casino is saying I can't keep my winnings because I'm actually two kids in a trench coat
07:21Which is exactly what I want them to think
07:23So why do you need us ?
07:26Why I want to sue my own penis, of course
07:29Our specialty
07:30Wow, that was upsettingly accurate
07:33I'm scanning your brains
07:35Ah !
07:36Well, me and Lincoln have been working together seamlessly
07:39Oh, like how you wowed everybody at the fancy clients mixer
07:43Folks, looks like we got another
07:47Tell me Miss Flambe, do you enjoy Tolstoy ?
07:51Hell yes I do !
07:53Buzz, Woody, lots of Huggy Bear
07:56Frigging Slanky Dog !
07:58So I goofed one time
08:01Well...
08:01A wonderful jest Miss Flambe
08:05But let's change gears
08:06Do you enjoy Schubert ?
08:08Sheila, he means
08:09Delbert's shoe is a character now ?
08:12Ah ! Dogbert's not gonna like that !
08:14Well, it's not like Irene's workplace etiquette is so amazing
08:21Irene, is there a fire ?
08:22What's going on ?
08:23Whoa, you look so cool and grown up
08:26I am so cool
08:28Thanks to smoking cigarettes
08:29But surely looking cool is the only benefit smoking provides
08:34Well, don't tell anyone
08:36But cigarettes are also the secret to my huge muscles and perfect teeth
08:40Wow, if I was a kid I'd want to be just like you
08:43I'll be right back
08:44I'm just gonna go get extra smoke by having the rest of these inside an abandoned refrigerator
08:51Okay, what Irene did in that clip was objectively perfect
08:55But sometimes she's also bad
08:56Well, all I can say is that as a male leader
09:00I'm doing my best to foster a safe place for all my female employees to thrive
09:06Ring-a-ding-ding
09:08My HR programming awards you 10 points for ham-fisted lip service
09:13Speaking of lips and fisting and service and ham
09:17Let's move on to the next question which is about interoffice dating
09:20The forbidden fruit of a boss's thigh
09:24Or a male boy's foot
09:26Don't do it, yeah
09:27Frank Sinatra had an affair with Humphrey Bogart's wife Lauren Bacall
09:32While old Bogey was dying of cancer
09:35Are there any office romances that you need to disclose ?
09:39Obviously not
09:40Well, technically
09:42We've had sex
09:44What?
09:45It just happened once
09:47And it's really not a big deal
09:51It's actually a huge deal
09:53Now we have to dissect your entire sexual encounter in extreme detail
09:58Right after this
10:00There are ads ?
10:01Oh boy
10:02I have to give a big presentation at work that'll really wow the boss
10:07But all I have is a 20 minute video that quickly and concisely lays out the points I gotta get
10:12across
10:12I'm fired for sure
10:15Maybe not
10:15What if I told you there was one company brave enough to make themed six-hour-long corporate virtual reality
10:21experiences ?
10:22Man, this sucks !
10:24First Kevin exists, now I gotta watch a commercial to hear my uncle talk about his penis activities ?
10:30Please !
10:31Good purpose of Las Vegas ! Stop your looting !
10:34Please, you freaking little bastards ! Stop it !
10:38God, jeez ! They're looting already !
10:41Soon there won't be a single unflipped car in all of Las Vegas !
10:45All right, enough ! I'm out !
10:48Why can't I get out of this thing ?
10:50Because it's locked on your head, doll face !
10:52And it ain't coming off until you've completed the program !
10:56Did you not hear me crooning all the fine print ?
10:58A premature exit from the game may cause seizures and diarrhea !
11:03F*** !
11:05Minus one point !
11:07All right, you swinging cats ! Let's get sexual !
11:15Again, we're not a couple ! Also, Irene is 16 !
11:19Taken care of, baby !
11:23There's no air ?
11:24Oh, sure there is ! So, tell us all how it started !
11:28Any pay-for-play ? In exchange of money ? Promises of favors ? Milk stuff ?
11:32Are you a milk boy ?
11:33We both got really worked up from doing like 100 cases for a judge who got his head cut off
11:37!
11:37So, we did what came naturally !
11:39It was the most normal thing in the world !
11:40And then, it stayed normal ! The end !
11:42Legally, I gotta see it !
11:44Ooh ! Lincoln ! Dirty rodents still belong in a nice office building !
11:49What's an exterminator to do ?
11:51Please, ma'am, just make it quick and squash me !
11:55I'm done, I'm done, I'm done !
11:56I'm done, I'm done !
11:59Yeah, eggs !
12:00I have the combined sexual memories of some terrible men !
12:04And even I know that's weird, kid !
12:06Tell me, Sheila, did any permanent physical or professional harm result from this encounter ?
12:11No ! I was worried Lincoln might get weird, but he didn't !
12:14It was a one-time thing !
12:15Like when I one time had jacuzzi sex with Elvira, mistress of the night !
12:21Huh ? Huh ?
12:23Gah, they gotta be real wretch !
12:26Okay, if we're all done trying to trick old Rocco into generating porno, I've got good news !
12:34Oh, congratulations !
12:37Did you know ?
12:38You mean about the two of them boinking their yoinkers ?
12:41Of course !
12:41Yeah, it was kinda obvious !
12:43I'll kill you slow !
12:45Death thread minus sweaty points !
12:47Before we move on to team building, one more Rat Pack fun fact !
12:51Everyone just kinda went along with the way Frank Dino and the rest mistreated Sammy Davis Jr.
12:56How have you abused each other ?
12:59Okay, then, if nobody has any other complaints, we can move on to...
13:02Oh, oh, I do !
13:03Me too !
13:04Me too !
13:04Me too !
13:05Clip !
13:06I did all this work to help Glem win, and he's hogging all the glory !
13:10That can't be true !
13:12Glem is the most humble man who ever lived !
13:15Congrats, Glem !
13:16You really did it !
13:18Oui !
13:19Oui ?
13:20Really ?
13:20Of course, oui !
13:22Oui meaning French for yes, I did it !
13:25I'm the best in the world !
13:27Oh, Sheila !
13:29Stop getting your smut sent to the office !
13:31Why don't you just look at porn online ?
13:32Because I...
13:33There's porn online ?
13:34I gotta go !
13:35Irene, I gotta go !
13:36Porn's online now !
13:37Tell Lincoln I die !
13:41Oh, yeah !
13:42Irene, stop getting your smut sent to the office !
13:45What's up, Irene ?
13:47It's me, Carter !
13:48Let's go play tennis, pal !
13:50Oh, my God, Sheila !
13:52For the millionth time, I won't be in your gender-swapped white chicks movie !
13:55Which, for some reason, you're calling White Chucks ?
13:59Carter !
14:00There you are, man !
14:01Ready to go play tennis ?
14:03I can't believe anyone even saw that piece of crap !
14:06White Chucks made 31 million !
14:07Also, it should clearly become White Chucks !
14:09I was gonna make him fast mad at my wedding one day !
14:12I don't have a lot of male friends !
14:14Activity time !
14:17Boy, the parts of my amalgamated personality that are raging drunk, sure are thirsty !
14:22Time to test your communication skills !
14:25My drink order will pop up here !
14:27It's your job to work together to fill it !
14:30This is like that fun cooking game that I'm pretty sure caused my brother's divorce !
14:35Nope, no time for Kevin-Lore !
14:37Look, I know we're all a little annoyed,
14:39but can we just power through this so we can keep our business ?
14:43Well, your time starts ring-a-ding now !
14:46Okay, Sheila, you take the salt rim station !
14:48Irene, you're on garnish duty !
14:50And Kevin, you take muddling !
14:52Kevin, help me !
14:54I know it looks funny, but this really hurts !
14:56Okay, we're gonna have to cover for Glem !
14:58Kevin, I need some blood oranges !
14:59Cover for me ?
15:00Glem, all I do is contribute !
15:03Oh, okay, let's go over your contributions for the last month !
15:07Glem, please, just file the paperwork this time !
15:10Like I'm so easily distracted !
15:15Hey, I need that to look cool !
15:17I hope you're ready for several hours of fighting, crow !
15:21The old fish-out-of-the-window con !
15:27Glem, did you file that ?
15:39What the hell ?
15:40Lincoln, don't panic, but I'm gonna need you to immediately start kissing my legs
15:43so that they know you're not challenging my dominance !
15:46Oh, and tell me one way a law firm can't use an army of crows !
15:52Yeah, that's a great example of how much Glem rules !
15:54So what if he sucks at this game ?
15:56It's not his fault he's so old and decrepit !
15:58I'm not old, Irene, I'm 63 !
16:01That's Gen X !
16:02I was the original bass player in Bikini Kill !
16:05I don't know what Bikini Kill is !
16:07Neither did I, according to Kathleen Hanna !
16:10Okay, seriously, Irene, if anyone needs to listen to Bikini Kill, it's you !
16:14Secondly, we're trying to run a business !
16:15Yeah, Irene, you're a smart kid, but you've still got some growing up to do !
16:19I mean, you still believe in Santa, like, three months ago !
16:21That was a blind spot !
16:22I am mature !
16:24Oh, really ?
16:25No one has ever taken an interest in me like this !
16:28They all think I'm a freak !
16:31You're beautiful, inside and out !
16:35Go to prom with me ?
16:37Again ?
16:38Irene, please, stop making bets you can turn nerds into prom kings and queens !
16:42The last one is still crying outside !
16:45Irene, I got your favorite song !
16:48Love me !
16:50Why am I the one who gets called out ?
16:52You old !
16:53Great news !
16:55Rent this month is covered !
17:03Son, you call that dancing with your future wife ?
17:06Why can't you please women like your brother ?
17:08I'm trying, mummy !
17:11This is the best birthday ever !
17:14I know it's hard, Sheila, but cats can't live forever !
17:18But I wanted more time with little Overton Obie Wakefield Jones !
17:23Hello ? Is this 92.9 Puzzmaster in the morning ?
17:27Dammit, Charles !
17:28Told you not to call me during Double Price Friday Fartstravaganza !
17:32I'm sure he wouldn't want you to feel sad. He loved you.
17:36Oh, great ! So I'm failing him !
17:38Dr. Sneak and boys Rodney at 103.9 WGRP, The Grove ?
17:43Yeah ! Charles, again !
17:46If it's any consolation, the machine we use to practice ignoring Glem is really starting to work.
17:53Charles, I swear to God !
17:55Wait, Dr. Sneak !
17:56Don't hurry up !
17:58No !
18:00That... that does make me feel better.
18:02Can you pass me a tissue ?
18:05Everyone steals tissues from the bank.
18:07You're just mad about me and your Uncle York in our boinkers.
18:09You think I can't handle knowing stuff ?
18:12I'm the firm's investigator !
18:13I carry a legal handgun !
18:15I'm the only one who knows Glem's real name !
18:17And I hate that she won't tell me !
18:20Sheila had five other business partners before you !
18:22What ?
18:23Oh, yep !
18:25She's been doing the magician-slash-creative-director act all over town !
18:30Lincoln, you didn't really think you were my first, did you ?
18:33I can't help being a sad-sack white dude magnet !
18:35I'd put you on the side !
18:37I thought what we had was professionally special !
18:40Don't project your sex feelings onto this !
18:42The sex was nothing !
18:44I mean, yes, I have to make myself fall in love with a person to have sex with them,
18:48but I literally do that all the time !
18:51Well, how about this ?
18:52Maybe you're not the best boss I've had !
18:55You're a control freak too broken up about his dead mom to see how needy he is !
18:59News flash, dawg !
19:01We all have dead moms !
19:02Not me !
19:03Your mom's alive ?
19:04Is she like 130 ?
19:05I'm the titular Hole from the band Hole !
19:09Oh, hey, cool, Cass !
19:10Whenever Lincoln falls asleep at his desk, Glem steals his plasma !
19:12Not to sell, just to look at !
19:14Fellows !
19:15Uncle Lincoln had an AI girlfriend on his phone until he wrote her a poem and she killed herself !
19:19Excuse me !
19:20What ?
19:20I just want to remind you that if you fail this challenge, you lose your license !
19:26Ah, the hell with it !
19:27I don't care any-
19:31More !
19:31Well, the new guy managed to complete the challenge, while you birds were squawking !
19:36Almost seems like that should disqualify you, but for some reason it doesn't !
19:40Congratulations on your great teamwork !
19:44We could please return to your homes !
19:49Well, the car flippin' is startin', so now I'm gonna have to wait till next month's riot !
19:54Let's just get this over with so I can never see these people again !
19:58Absolutely !
19:59Only like five or six more Rat Pack-themed activities to go !
20:05Meatball !
20:06Catania !
20:08Rat Pack love to cap things off with a roast !
20:11But since this is a whole HR teamwork deal, it's a toast !
20:14Okay, go !
20:18I've got something to say !
20:20You people are clearly awful, and I'm stuck with you for the next two academic terms !
20:25But you know who else you're stuck with ?
20:27Family !
20:29And you all make each other crazy in a way only families can !
20:33Irene is hurt because she looks up to you all !
20:36Glem is clearly deranged, but he's smart !
20:39Like John Wayne Gacy, who, last time I checked, was a pretty talented clown !
20:44Lincoln, Sheila, we're clearly in love with each other !
20:48Oh yeah, John Irene !
20:50God, thank you !
20:51See, this is why Irene's my favorite !
20:53Wait, um, what ?
20:54You're my favorite !
20:55You're really smart and strong !
20:57It's like looking into a mirror !
20:59And little Lincoln, you're not my first business partner,
21:02but you're the only person who ever put me on the sign and let me be me !
21:06Dog Bird's not gonna like that !
21:09Yeah, he'd probably be like, Schuber can talk now !
21:12I'm Angry Bird !
21:14How untoward !
21:16Sorry, here, have a cigar !
21:18Eat die pack, you fancy bitch !
21:21Aw, I'm sorry too, Sheila !
21:24I didn't say sorry !
21:25And I'm sorry, Glem !
21:27And Irene !
21:27This place would suck without you freaks !
21:30Now, what's really helpful to us is this figure that shows how many...
21:33Attention shoppers !
21:35In celebration of me figuring out we have a public address system in the office,
21:38for the next half hour, we'll be holding a sale on...
21:42Uh...
21:43Lincoln's...
21:44Butts...
21:45Poops !
21:46Okay, so anyway, this figure...
21:48Damn it, Irene !
21:49Piece of shit !
21:49You get one chance at a first PA joke and you blew it !
21:52This is why you have no friends your age !
21:53This is why Dad left !
21:55You don't deserve to live !
21:56You should just take Glem's gun and just do what you...
21:59Happy birthday !
22:01Happy birthday !
22:01Gotcha !
22:03So, with all due respect, I think I'll bring my wife's wrongful death suit elsewhere !
22:07Irene, I do think of you as mature !
22:10Which is why you're my investigator !
22:12And not some disgusting intern !
22:14But, I'm not gonna tell you when I have sex !
22:16That's weird !
22:17And not the fun kind of weird like Glem !
22:19Ahoy !
22:20Irene, take your time growing up !
22:23The adult world is full of hepatitis and crows !
22:26And yeah, maybe you're part stupid, but you're far ahead of where I was when I was your age !
22:43The curse !
22:47I don't have anything nice to say about any of you, and I think you all have drinking problems !
22:51Seven seconds left on the clock !
22:52Ah, fine !
22:53I love you all like a family and appreciate what each of you individually bring into my life !
22:56Especially Glem, who I plan on stuffing and keeping in my basement after he dies, which will probably be soon
23:00!
23:01I'm younger than Colin Firth !
23:02That can't be right !
23:04Well, that was terrible, babies !
23:07But lucky for you, the score is just for fun, and your grade is participation-based !
23:12Oh, eat a dick, Rocco Prosecco !
23:14Minus ten points !
23:17And now, the end is nigh !
23:20No more games left to play !
23:23I ate a long goodbye !
23:26So instead, I will just say !
23:30I think the headset's just unlocked !
23:33Wait, please, before you leave, just show the computer !
23:35Please !
23:38I heard all the things you said about me !
23:40Yeah, huh ? Did we miss the riot ?
23:42Good news, Las Vegas !
23:44The hot dates have been restored to their horny, insensual former selves !
23:48And as an apology, they added a fifth one !
23:51It's named Rebunca !
23:55She's boy Sharice's aunt !
23:57And that does come into play !
23:59Woooo !
24:03Ah, I'm sorry we missed it !
24:05Who cares, there's Rebunca now !
24:08So, now what ?
24:09Well, I see one car left that's still upright out there !
24:19That's my car !
24:21That's my car !
24:21Yeah !
24:23I know !
24:25I have a delight !
24:26Have a good day !
24:32I have a good day !
24:34We go out because I'm taking a time !
24:34To be on display, keep going on !
24:36To be on display, make her ride !
24:46We go out with the light there !
24:47You can see the light and make it !
24:48We go out and leave it !
24:49I have some light, you can see it !
24:50From the light and make it !
24:51I have one night !
24:51That's how I have my face !
24:51Through this morning !
24:51I have a great day !
24:51Sous-titrage Société Radio-Canada
25:51...
26:21...
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