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00:00Stand up straight.
00:02You're growing up so much, you'll be bigger than your dad soon.
00:05Archie, we measured you.
00:06Stand there, turn around.
00:08We've always kept your effort in all of the kids,
00:10of how much they've grown over the years.
00:13It's just nice to be able to look back.
00:15Look, there's Sophie when she was nine.
00:17Tell you something, I didn't expect to see so many names on this, did you?
00:20I know.
00:22Childhood flies by in the blink of an eye.
00:25Look at Bonnie, look how big she is now.
00:27Before you know it, they've grown up and gone.
00:29Stand up straight.
00:30Wow.
00:31So I think Max is actually taller than me.
00:34But growing up in a relationship is a whole different kettle of fish.
00:38Right, who's next?
00:39We can grow together.
00:41I don't really want to separate the family.
00:44Or we can grow apart.
00:46And we have tried everything.
00:50I'm going to go, so you're just going to have to stop for a minute.
00:55Things will get better.
01:09Don't be careful.
01:21You're just going to have to stop for a minute.
01:23Don't be careful.
01:26I don't need to stop for a minute.
01:28One of the first signs that your family's growing up...
01:35..is when you can't get in the bathroom.
01:39Grooming, it really just used to be the girls,
01:41they would spend ages in the bathroom, but now, it's the boys.
01:45Used to be like, they were just typical boys, you know,
01:48who weren't bothered if the flies followed them around, you know,
01:50they could go for a few days without washing their face
01:53or just do an overcoat of deodorant.
01:55Now, completely different.
01:59Noel and Sue have noticed that their boys
02:02are growing up faster than they used to.
02:04I won't name who this one is, but...
02:07..got his aftershaves, and then we've got this stuff.
02:11Natural moisturising factor HA.
02:16Bedroom to bedroom, it's the same story.
02:19Look at this one. It's a full-on chemist, eh?
02:22You'd expect it if you're talking 17-, 18-year-olds,
02:25but, you know, we're not. We're talking 12.
02:28We're all waiting.
02:29Don't even know, look. There we go, look.
02:31Another one in the bathroom. One's come out, another one's gone in.
02:34There was a time when your dad taught you how to shave
02:37and which deodorant to buy.
02:39What is it?
02:40But not anymore.
02:42Forgetting all this, it's empty back, anything.
02:44They see it on TikTok, Instagram,
02:46and then it'll be, oh, I need to try that.
02:50Oscar and Casper may or may not be two of those concerned.
02:55So, personal grooming.
02:57I've changed how many times I've washed my hair,
03:01deodorant, aftershave.
03:03You have to change it all
03:04cos you start to notice them more as you get older
03:08cos stuff happens.
03:12Your body starts to change
03:14and that means that you've got to do more.
03:17I'm going to start wearing after safety.
03:19I'll just watch the one that you use.
03:21Like Giorgio Armani or something.
03:23Yeah, I'll have some Giorgio Armani eventually.
03:26You hear a lot of negative things about social media,
03:28but the boys are getting some good tips
03:30about personal hygiene and things,
03:32so that can only be a good thing, can't it?
03:34What can you be doing in there?
03:36Not sure Noel agrees.
03:37Can't wait any longer. I've got to go to work.
03:39I'm just going for the spray-and-go approach.
03:51Through more than 20 years,
03:53the Radford family has called Morecambe their home.
03:57Righty.
03:58They moved here when eldest daughter Sophie was just seven.
04:02I love it here.
04:04I can't believe I blew the water in today.
04:10Morecambe was quite run down when I was a kid,
04:12but as I've grown, it's definitely grown with me,
04:16and I love it now.
04:17Coming up here just clears the mind.
04:19And obviously, it's so beautiful to look at as well.
04:21It's so lovely.
04:23Morecambe has always been part of my life.
04:26I've been brought up here.
04:27I've brought my kids into the world in Morecambe.
04:30I've met my husband here.
04:33Yeah, I've done everything here.
04:35I have a regular routine.
04:37It's three miles each time.
04:38Sophie began weekly walks here during a difficult time in her life.
04:44Last year, I wasn't feeling great about myself.
04:49My mum and sisters took me to Amsterdam for my 30th,
04:53just to try and cheer me up.
04:55I will give you a burlesque worship today.
04:57But what was meant to be a bit of fun backfired.
05:00It's like a sexy dance, isn't it?
05:02It looks sexy, guys.
05:03I don't feel very sexy.
05:05I did tell my family that.
05:06I just wasn't feeling too good about myself.
05:08I was struggling with day-to-day life.
05:12It's just a bit weird.
05:14And I don't feel comfortable in doing it.
05:17It was quite a big thing for me,
05:19thinking, you know, this is really not Sophie.
05:22Like, right, I'm going to stop because I'm getting a bit emotional.
05:26She's not the sort of person that ever gets down.
05:29She's always really happy, smiley, bubbly.
05:32She never really said what was going on.
05:34But she has seemed so much better since then.
05:37It's cold.
05:38I should have worn a jumper.
05:40Do you like one in the van?
05:41No, I don't think I do.
05:43To help Sophie's recovery,
05:44Sue, Chloe and Ellie are in the Lake District
05:48planning her a surprise.
05:49There's several different types of functions, really.
05:52And you've got a great artwork on the River Labyrinth round there.
05:56Sophie and Joe are just coming up
05:59to their 10-year wedding anniversary.
06:00And nothing tears you up more than a party.
06:03So we're just looking for a venue.
06:06Really pretty, isn't it?
06:07I really like this, do you?
06:08Yeah, I do like it.
06:09Sophie would like this.
06:10I think so as well.
06:1210 years is a big achievement.
06:14I can't remember our 10-year anniversary, to be honest,
06:16but there you go.
06:17But it is a long...
06:19Don't look at me like that.
06:21You're digging yourself in a hole, Noel.
06:23This is really nice, isn't it?
06:26So I think it would definitely be fair to say that
06:28if there's any kind of party to be organised,
06:30I'm definitely there.
06:32The girls are scouting a venue for a 10th anniversary bash.
06:35I like it.
06:36And anything we all like, Sophie tends to like, doesn't she?
06:39The lakes is special because Sophie and Jo got married in the lakes,
06:43so I feel like the venue would be nice to be in the lakes, wouldn't it?
06:49Sophie met Jo when she was just 13 years old.
06:53Jo used to work in the local Tesco,
06:56which was just down the road, wasn't it?
06:58Yeah, whenever she'd have to nip in for things at work.
07:01Thinking I'm a bit of a flirt.
07:03They started going out and then had Dursy.
07:05I think they'd been together maybe a year.
07:07Because I can remember when Jo proposed to Sophie,
07:10it was really cute, wasn't it?
07:11And he bought, like, a big bouquet of flowers.
07:13And then...
07:14Put the card in it and the ring.
07:15Put the card in the ring.
07:16Yeah, it's really cute.
07:19But a wedding isn't just about the happy couple.
07:23Do you know what, though?
07:23I've got such good memories of my dad
07:26and Sophie's wedding day.
07:28Do you remember he fell down the hill?
07:29He literally rolled down it.
07:31It was so funny.
07:31I can't really have missed that.
07:33Yeah.
07:33My mum was laughing her head up at him.
07:35But, yeah, he did enjoy Sophie's wedding day.
07:40Ten years is a long time in life, as well as marriage.
07:44I just think it's flown by,
07:46but there's been so much that's happened in them ten years as well,
07:49hasn't there?
07:50We only had the 17 kids back then,
07:53so we've had another five since.
07:55We just had Hallie,
07:57so she was our first baby born after we lost Alfie.
08:01We've had lots of grandchildren.
08:02We've lost Noel's mum,
08:05my dad.
08:08I suppose, ultimately, life is about beginnings and ends.
08:14Nothing stays the same.
08:18Especially people, they don't stay the same.
08:23Unfortunately.
08:24Sophie has been concealing a secret.
08:27I've been bottling a lot up in the past year,
08:30and I haven't told my family everything that's been going on.
08:33Other problems, you know, face the fact that marriage doesn't seem to be exactly what you want it to be,
08:40and it's not resolving itself.
08:43Why haven't you told them?
08:45I feel like because mum and dad have always got so much going on,
08:47I don't want to burden them with my problems.
08:51I am kind of reaching a point now where I've got to do something about it.
08:56Our marriage isn't working.
09:10Big events are commonplace in this family.
09:14Yay!
09:15Let's have a party!
09:18And when the Radfords throw a birthday party,
09:21the whole town knows about it.
09:24So the girls are having a joint birthday party,
09:26because I feel it's just 25.
09:29Elodie's nearly two.
09:31Got all of her friends here today,
09:33all of the family.
09:35Got everyone here.
09:36Having a great time.
09:38These days, birthday parties have grown into something different.
09:44Gone are the days of green jelly,
09:47Sandwiches with the crusts off.
09:49What?
09:49And sausage and cheese on sticks.
09:51That's disgusting.
09:53These days, parties are big business.
09:55Archie, budge back a bit.
09:58His birthdays are really special, aren't they?
09:59Yeah, you do spend time as well planning it and thinking about it, don't you?
10:03Because you want that birthday to be a core memory for them.
10:07Right, you ready?
10:09Bouncy Castle, soft play, birthday cake,
10:13fighting all their friends.
10:16Do as much as I could.
10:20Predictably, Noel doesn't agree.
10:22And neither does Harley.
10:24Kids' birthday parties are like the aftershower Oscar event,
10:29invitations sent out, goodie bags.
10:32You become a babysitter for 20 other kids that aren't yours.
10:35Is it an expense you really need?
10:36That's what I said to Mila, I said,
10:38can we not just do it at all?
10:40I mean, I think you're dinosaurs.
10:42Like, how can you not care about a child's birthday party?
10:45You should have had princesses then, shouldn't you, instead of children?
10:48Stop arguing, you lot.
11:02On a birthday, you can plan everything apart from one thing.
11:07But it's okay.
11:09It's okay, it's not my birthday.
11:19So, who's excited for Jump Rush?
11:22Hitting one of Morecambe's attractions...
11:24Are you going to jump the highest?
11:25I'm going to jump the highest.
11:27..are Sophie and her three children, Daisy, April and Leo.
11:31Let's go jump around.
11:34Sophie's definitely a big, big family person.
11:37Kids come first, Sophie and Jo come second, isn't it?
11:40Come on, then.
11:41Making them happy, and then it's things for herself.
11:45Size five, two and two, please.
11:48You're not a size six.
11:49No, you're not.
11:50All right, are you going to have a go?
11:52I think I'll probably watch you all this time.
11:57Leo, why don't you do that?
11:58See how fast you can get across?
12:01Places like this are familiar to Sophie.
12:04Me and Jo met at, like, a laser tag thing called Megazone.
12:08Just round the corner from here, actually.
12:12But today, Jo isn't here.
12:18Jo has moved out for a trial.
12:23This is, like, very raw.
12:25It literally just happened.
12:28He's living it with one of his family members.
12:31Just give each other some space and see how we go with that.
12:35What has happened?
12:37I don't really want to be going into it, because, obviously, it is private.
12:41And, you know, me and Jo both see things very differently.
12:45It's just not like it used to be, if that makes sense.
12:48We just, we're grown apart.
12:51When all you've known is a secure family unit, striking out alone isn't easy.
12:56I was a bit nervous, actually, coming out the door to come here on my own.
13:01Because, obviously, I've been in...
13:03I've grown up in a really big family, so I've never been lonely there.
13:07I've spent half my life with Jo, so I've never been lonely there.
13:11Is that nice, Leo?
13:13It can be quite hard sometimes to stay, like, neutral, if you will,
13:19in front of the kids.
13:22Having fun.
13:25We need to keep everything as normal as possible.
13:28It's quite hard to keep that in.
13:31You have to put that front on, don't you?
13:36We have had a separation before, a few years back now.
13:41But we did actually end up coming back together.
13:46I'm not really thinking about life without Jo at the minute.
13:51I'm just trying to stay positive and think of the kids.
13:55Yeah, that's my goal at the minute.
14:14What's going on?
14:18Something's tickled five-year-old Ophelia.
14:24Oh, her laugh is just... It's contagious, isn't it?
14:26I really do love it when kids, when something really tickles them
14:30and they're just laughing hysterically and they just cannot stop laughing.
14:36Why is she laughing at me? I forgot what's wrong on the face.
14:41What?
14:42Oh, it's mummy.
14:43Ophelia's relationship with Harley is super special.
14:46I'm really proud of Ophelia.
14:48Yeah, I'm just proud of the character she's turning into.
14:51What's funny?
14:53Daddy's face.
14:54I'm really proud of Ophelia before we got together,
14:57so Ophelia's not my biological daughter.
14:59No, it's like...
15:00But a couple of months ago, I did get parental responsibility for her.
15:04And now I feel like she's mine.
15:06You don't get, you know the world
15:09Harley has been in Ophelia's life since she was only six months old.
15:15It doesn't seem five minutes since Ophelia was born.
15:18Never mind five years.
15:24We've had all the big milestones of walking, talking, crawling.
15:30Starting nursery.
15:32Ophelia's next milestone is school,
15:34but there's one thing Millie and Harley have to do first.
15:38The final piece in the jigsaw
15:40is that we've applied for Ophelia's surname to change before school begins.
15:44It should come through any day now.
15:46So Millie and Harley are changing Ophelia's surname
15:49because Chester and Elodie are both Passmore-Radford
15:53and Ophelia's just Radford.
15:55Let's go get your uniform!
15:57Just so Ophelia will never feel different.
16:00So they're going to get that change all the same.
16:03That's jumpers.
16:04You need cardigans here.
16:08She's seen mum, Sue, do this many times,
16:10but now buying school uniform is finally Millie's turn.
16:13So we need cardigans, school shoes, school T-shirts, PE kit, pumps.
16:21It's just like a never-ending list, isn't it?
16:23Lift your arms up.
16:25How do you feel about starting school?
16:27Good.
16:28You feel good? Do you feel excited?
16:31Yeah.
16:31Can't believe how fast she's grown up.
16:33Lift your arms right up.
16:35All of the nursery reports have said how confident she is,
16:37so I think she is going to thrive in school.
16:41I think she's going to love it.
16:42Pass that.
16:43Boom.
16:44Ophelia's ready, but what about mum?
16:46Yeah, that's your size.
16:49She's been with me the whole way through motherhood,
16:51and now she's leaving me to go to school.
16:55Are you playing all of them?
16:56No.
16:57And it is really sad.
17:02I do think Millie's going to find it quite hard when Ophelia does start school.
17:07I remember when Chris started school and it was just such a weird feeling of him
17:11not being around anymore, like 24-7,
17:14and you having to hand the care over of your child to somebody else.
17:18Do you feel sad, Ophelia, that you're going to school and leaving mummy?
17:22No?
17:23Who am I going to have at home to annoy now?
17:26You can annoy daddy.
17:28Yeah, I can annoy daddy instead.
17:29I'll do that, Liz.
17:30Lift your arms up once more.
17:34Hello, Mr Passmore.
17:36Back home.
17:37It's Rachel from solicitors.
17:41I'm trying to lodge the application for Ophelia's surname at the High Court,
17:46but there's been a problem with the form.
17:50Yeah, I'm going to need a lot of name labels.
17:53You might not want to get the name labels printed just yet.
17:56I need you to come back to the office urgently, please,
17:59so that we can submit a new application to the court.
18:03If you could give me a call, I'd really appreciate that.
18:06I'm unable to guarantee if the change could be done on time.
18:11Own up, then. Whose fault is it?
18:13Harley.
18:14Millie.
18:15Millie and Harley's disorganisation has let them down again.
18:20With two weeks till school, time is running out.
18:24Hello, is that the family lawyer?
18:26I need an urgent appointment, please.
18:35As your kids grow up, the hope is that they can navigate their way through life without needing parental help.
18:46But six weeks into Sophie and Jo's trial separation...
18:50Can I order another coffee, please?
18:52..mom and dad have had to be told.
18:55I mean, as a mum, I definitely knew that there was something not right.
18:59Sophie, she wasn't quite as bright and bubbly as what she would normally be,
19:03and I did kind of think it was probably something to do with Sophie and Jo's marriage,
19:09but you just hope that they'll be able to work it out.
19:14How are things going?
19:16Hmm...
19:17My emotions have been very much up and down.
19:20I would say more down than up.
19:23So they're not really any better?
19:24No, not really.
19:26No.
19:27Sophie's facing a dilemma.
19:29Do they get back together or split up for good?
19:32What are you thinking?
19:34Hmm, I'm thinking all sorts at the minute.
19:36My head's just...
19:38..crazy.
19:39Do I just keep going as we are, or do we just end it?
19:43Me and dad always thought, you know, you and Jo were such a lovely thing.
19:47Well, this is it.
19:48Things, when they're good, they're really good.
19:50And it does, it goes on for a little bit, but then...
19:53..it just goes back down again.
19:55You seem to just go round and round in the same circles.
19:59There's only so many times you can keep doing that, isn't there?
20:07You know, it is really hard seeing you upset yourself if it's having an effect on you.
20:11You've got to think, you know, do I have to do something like that?
20:14Yeah, definitely.
20:16It's very, very hard even thinking about, you know,
20:20coming out of a relationship after so many years.
20:23Everything that we've built together, house, children, all of that.
20:28You've literally got to think of everything.
20:31So, it's not an easy process.
20:34Yeah, it's quite difficult.
20:41Of all of Sophie's concerns, there's one that's at the top of the list.
20:46How it's going to affect the kids.
20:48That's the reason why we haven't really done it yet.
20:51That's my main concern.
20:53I don't really want to separate the family.
20:56The family unit's a massive thing for me.
20:59I know, but then it gets to a point, doesn't it, where you have to think,
21:02is that the right thing for the kids?
21:04Yeah, I know.
21:04If you're not happy, then that's rubbing off on the kids,
21:07and they're not happy either.
21:11Everybody wants their marriage to work, don't they?
21:13They want the love story and...
21:16Yeah, and the happy ending and everything.
21:17But, unfortunately, sometimes, you know, it doesn't for whatever reason.
21:23You can tell that Joe absolutely adores you.
21:25Yeah.
21:26But sometimes that's just not enough, isn't it?
21:28No.
21:29We have tried everything.
21:33So us separating permanently would probably be better.
21:37I just don't feel like I've got any other option, really.
21:40But it also scares me.
21:43Yeah.
21:57Can you jump in the back, please?
22:00Three in the front, two in the back.
22:02All right, then.
22:04Noel is taking Sophie and the grandkids out for the day.
22:08See you later.
22:09It's been a difficult few weeks for the family.
22:12Wait, why are we going back to this one?
22:13After Sophie and Joe made a big decision about their marriage.
22:17I would say at the start, me and Joe, you know, a little bit of like,
22:21no, let's not, let's do it, let's not.
22:23But we've both come to terms with the fact that me and Joe are definitely finally over now.
22:30And that's it.
22:31We're better off separating.
22:33And, yeah.
22:35Quick question.
22:35Where are we actually going?
22:37See a man about a dog.
22:38So he used to say that to me all the time when I was a kid.
22:41And then there was this one day he said it and I was like, oh, whatever, I don't believe it.
22:44And he came back with a tiny Cocker Spaniel.
22:46It was called Scooby.
22:47I think we called him that because he looked a bit like Scooby-Doo.
22:49Yeah.
22:51The kids have only had a short time to come to terms with their parents' separation.
22:56What's we filming?
22:58Picnic.
22:59Noel is hoping that getting them all out of the house will help them through this difficult time.
23:04Who wants to put the blanket down?
23:06Are you going to do it later?
23:07Here?
23:07There's nothing worse when you have to tell kids some bad news, some sad news.
23:12Because you're trying to shelter anything like that away from them as much as you can.
23:18But, you know, I think part of parenting is you do have to do that.
23:22There we go.
23:23There we go.
23:24It has been quite a fair few weeks now since me and Joe separated.
23:29With the ages that they are, I can imagine it's about half the kids to understand what's actually going on.
23:36It's such a difficult thing.
23:38But both Sophie and Joe will have told them everything's going to be OK.
23:44Both mum and dad will love them just as much as they always do.
23:48It's not that there's still mum and dad at the end of the day, still the children.
23:52There's no difference.
23:53It's just mum and dad are going the separate ways.
23:56That's all it is.
23:59Sad, you know, because Joe, you know, we've always got on with Joe.
24:02It's a good laugh, but, you know, relations do break down, don't they?
24:05They won't be the first, they won't be the last.
24:07And this does happen, but when it's as close to you as it is, it's sad.
24:16Have you saved me anything?
24:19Yeah, you've got a sausage roll.
24:20A sausage roll?
24:21A sausage roll.
24:23They're not quite as good as yours.
24:26The hard bit is definitely now, you know, because obviously it's still quite raw.
24:30Having the new normal, you know, is just me and the kids.
24:34It's going to be very different, but I'm going to make it as enjoyable for them as I possibly can.
24:39With the help of granddad...
24:42Might not work yet.
24:43...their family have made a good start to their new life together.
24:49...their family have made a good start to their new life together.
25:16It's your job to do it.
25:18And you've filled in the form wrong in the first place.
25:21Millie's making the long journey to the family lawyer in Blackburn,
25:24with a stop on the way at Lancaster Court to get the new application stamped.
25:29To add to the chaos of the day, Harley needs to get out of work,
25:32get to me, get it signed, leave and get back to work.
25:36And then I've got to get to Blackburn.
25:41I do feel really guilty that it's not being done in time for Ophelia to start in school,
25:45the name change.
25:47I am worried that Ophelia could find out one day that Harley isn't a real dad.
25:52Right, wait here, I'll be as quick as I can.
25:54Harley, are you in there?
25:56I want to do that when the time's right.
25:59I want to tell her the time's right.
26:00Well, we both will tell everyone the time's right.
26:03And that's not right now.
26:05So, we've got a few years yet.
26:13Sorted.
26:15Blackburn, as quick as you can, please.
26:17One down, one to go.
26:21Hi, where are you, Mum?
26:22My one!
26:23Back in Morecambe.
26:24What are you arguing over now?
26:26It's rain stop play.
26:27Er, I'm the best cheerleader.
26:29With everyone confined to barracks.
26:31I'm the best cheerleader.
26:32They're all annoying each other.
26:33I'm much better than yours.
26:35My one!
26:35No.
26:37My God.
26:39I'm the fastest.
26:40I've beat you by two or three seconds each time.
26:43Me by a landslide.
26:44All we're hearing in the house at the moment is,
26:47I'm better than you at this.
26:48I'm better than you at that.
26:50He's never been as wise.
26:51I am the fastest.
26:52He knows he's not.
26:53I am.
26:54Kids at this age are not very good at being supportive.
26:57They sort of, I think if they see somebody's weakness,
26:59they're going to jump on it.
27:00So, they just use that almost as a weapon against them.
27:03Start arguing with the other one.
27:04I'm better at football than you.
27:07I'm better at football.
27:09All kicking off out here now.
27:11Me.
27:12Me.
27:12I'm already set.
27:13You're already set.
27:14When there's only one of us around.
27:16The kids seem to coordinate themselves.
27:18What are you two arguing about?
27:20They all seem to fall out at the same time.
27:22She thinks she's smarter than me.
27:24I'm going to fall out with this one.
27:25These two are going to fall out.
27:26And the house just blends into chaos.
27:29I'm in set one.
27:30No, she's not.
27:31She's in set three.
27:32And I'm in set two.
27:33Which means I'm smarter.
27:34Five X.
27:36Noel's had enough.
27:37I'm definitely the best footballer.
27:39Soon as this weather's better,
27:40I'm going to sort this once and for all.
27:42No, there's not even any doubt of I am the best.
27:45He's just spin you in circles, mate.
27:56Well, what's taking you so long?
27:58I don't know.
27:59With Harley back at work,
28:01Millie is running out of time to get to Blackburn.
28:06If she misses the appointment,
28:09Ophelia will not be starting school as a Passmore Radford.
28:13Tell the drivers to put the foot down.
28:15You're on the speaker.
28:16Hurry up.
28:17Put your foot down.
28:18Wait.
28:20Probably a good job he's not here.
28:25Hurry, Millie.
28:26Hurry.
28:32Thanks so much.
28:33Can you wait for me?
28:36Let's go.
28:37Go.
28:38Go.
28:38The fastest I've ever walked.
28:41The final hurdle Millie has to overcome.
28:44Hi, Millie.
28:45You all right?
28:45Good to see you.
28:46Here again.
28:47It's Rachel, the family lawyer.
28:49You always do things twice.
28:50Well, when Harley's involved, yeah, it was a nightmare.
28:54Rachel needs to check that all the documentation is now correct.
28:58Got the change of name deed for Ophelia.
29:01Yeah.
29:02Basically renouncing her previous name.
29:05Yeah.
29:05And replacing that previous name with the new one.
29:08Yeah.
29:10Harley's keeping his fingers crossed
29:12that a difficult conversation can be avoided.
29:15Because I've been there a whole life.
29:17It does feel unfair that I've got to tell the truth one day
29:20that I'm not a biological dad.
29:21And it will be, like, one of the hardest days in my life.
29:25I have thought about it.
29:27It's always been like, it does upset me.
29:29Because I don't want to upset Ophelia.
29:31But at the end of the day, I am a dad still.
29:36So you're happy with that, correct?
29:38Yeah.
29:38Yeah, that's all correct.
29:39Brilliant.
29:40The name change is done.
29:41So I hope Ophelia's going to enjoy school.
29:44Is she looking forward to it?
29:45She's looking very forward to it, yeah.
29:47Do you think she's going to be a lawyer one day?
29:49A doctor?
29:50That would be great.
29:50If she was, she'll love that.
29:54That has been very stressful, so I am so relieved.
29:58We've put our feet up now and it's all done in time.
30:00But Millie has just traded one problem...
30:03Harley.
30:04...for another.
30:05My taxi's gone.
30:06I told her to wait for me.
30:10Well, you're going to have to get the train then, aren't you?
30:12I won't be home till tonight.
30:14See you tonight, then.
30:24Making a new start in life is never easy.
30:28But it's what Sophie's facing after her marriage has ended.
30:33Now she decided to take the next step.
30:37Sophie's posted that she's not with Joe anymore.
30:41So now she's told everyone to put it out in public.
30:44Like, cos now the whole world knows now.
30:47I guess for Sophie, I guess now that she's put that on there,
30:50it makes it now, like, official.
30:54With Joe at their house collecting more of his things...
30:59Sophie's staying out of the way at Mum and Dad's.
31:02Well, you know you're always welcome here, Soph, anyway, don't you?
31:05Yeah, I know, thank you.
31:06You've always said that, to be fair, haven't you?
31:09Yeah.
31:09If you want to stop over anything, feeling lonely or whatever.
31:12Mm.
31:17How are the kids?
31:18Do you know, the kids are doing really well.
31:20Like, really, really good.
31:22They don't ask questions or anything like that.
31:24They just sort of get on with it.
31:26Because you and Joe were not really getting on.
31:28It was having a negative effect on the kids, wasn't it?
31:31Mm, yeah.
31:31So I thought they'd have maybe struggled, but...
31:33No, they've shocked me.
31:34They've done really, really well, actually.
31:38Yeah.
31:39Yeah, because they still see both of us.
31:41You know, they're not missing out on one parent.
31:44And how are you?
31:46It's definitely quite a mixture of emotions.
31:48Erm, emotional.
31:51In some ways, happy, because, you know, it's come to an end.
31:55But definitely up and down a lot throughout the day.
31:59My anxiety has been quite bad the past few days.
32:03Erm, but it's bound to be up and down, isn't it?
32:08Never been through this before, so I don't know how long it'll go on for.
32:11I think I just need to try and get into a really good routine of just, like, me and the
32:14kids now.
32:15That's the thing, it is, it's your whole life's turned upside down at a minute, isn't it?
32:18It is going to be tough, though.
32:19Mm.
32:24I think Sophie's at the stage where she's been brave and she's been bold.
32:29She's done what she needed to do, but I think she's now facing reality of what that actually means.
32:35So it means an empty house, financial worries and no partner.
32:42You know, we've had a few situations like this, haven't we?
32:44But this time is, it's very different and, you know, there won't be any going back.
32:51I've got to just say, you know, enough's enough now.
32:54It's not very nice, because obviously you marry someone to spend the rest of your life with them, don't you?
32:59And how's Jo?
33:01Erm, that's just...
33:08And I'm sure you've had a lot of great times, haven't you?
33:11So it's hard seeing those times salivate the pain of the split, isn't it?
33:15Mm-hm.
33:15I'm going to go, so you're just going to have to stop for a minute.
33:21It's getting to you a little bit, isn't it?
33:24Mm-hm, no.
33:26It is quite hard.
33:31It just feels like everything's uphill, doesn't it, and you're climbing a mountain.
33:34Mm.
33:35I just can't wait to feel happy and bubbly again.
33:38Yeah.
33:39And a bit more normal.
33:40And you will.
33:40You will, so...
33:41You definitely will, so...
33:43You definitely will.
33:45You know, you've just got to take it one step at a time, haven't you?
33:48Yeah.
33:48You know, these hard days won't last for long, will they?
33:51And then you'll be back to your...
33:53I hope not.
33:53...bubly self.
33:56You've got your whole future ahead of you, haven't you?
33:58Mm-hm.
33:59But it will.
33:59Things will get better.
34:02But...
34:04Yep.
34:07Yep.
34:25On my way over her, I'll speak to you later.
34:29It's been two days since Noel and Sue have heard from Sophie.
34:32And concern has been growing.
34:36Yeah, normally we'd hear from Sophie every day.
34:38First thing in the morning, and then when she gets home from work,
34:40you'd hear from her again.
34:42Noel is making the ten-mile journey to check everything's OK.
34:45You know, this is really out of character, you know,
34:48since she's put it out there, what's been going on,
34:50and we've just not heard from her.
34:52You know, obviously this thing's been brewing,
34:54and it's eventually come to a head,
34:56and I think it's harder than what Sophie expected it to be.
35:00It's a really difficult situation for them all to be in,
35:03and it's a lot more testing than what she maybe thought it would be.
35:16It has definitely been one of the most worrying times for one of our kids,
35:21because normally I'm used to be able to give advice
35:23because I've normally been through lots of different things
35:27that the kids are going through.
35:29But with this situation, it's pretty alien to me
35:32because obviously we've not been through a marriage break-up.
35:35I mean, me and Noel have had issues over the years,
35:38but, you know, we've always worked our way through them,
35:40but this is totally different.
35:42You can't just say,
35:43oh, they're just going to work their way through this
35:44because obviously that's not going to happen,
35:46so giving advice on that has been quite hard.
35:59So, is she all right?
36:01All hunky-dory.
36:03She just wanted to take a couple of days to herself
36:05and, you know, get her head straight
36:07and get used to her new way of life, I guess.
36:10So, no, she's absolutely fine.
36:14So, she said she'll ring mum later on,
36:17and she said she'll ring her every day
36:18just to reassure her that she's OK.
36:21I'm happy now I've seen her.
36:22She knows we're here for anything she ever needs,
36:24and she knows that.
36:35Ophelia is also beginning a new chapter of life.
36:38Bake me a cake as fast as you can.
36:41High five.
36:42You're too slow.
36:45This morning is her first day at primary school.
36:49Let's get ready.
36:50Do you want to pack your pee bag first?
36:52Yeah.
36:53Right, come on then.
36:54Yeah, please.
36:54Yes, please.
36:56The five years of Ophelia's life,
36:58I have witnessed walking, talking, crawling,
37:01starting nursery,
37:02and even bigger, starting school.
37:04I don't know where my scooters are.
37:07I feel like she's going to, like, the real big world.
37:10I feel like she gets, like, more of independence.
37:12I think she'll love it.
37:14Go up.
37:15You pee your shorts.
37:16She's like boys.
37:19You're there.
37:19It's time to be a grown-up.
37:21Right, cheese.
37:23How gross.
37:23For Ophelia and Harley.
37:25She's been up since five o'clock this morning.
37:28She'll love it.
37:29How do you feel?
37:30Happy.
37:31Emotional.
37:33They left it late, but one thing has been sorted.
37:36What is your name?
37:38Ophelia Peppa.
37:40Wait for it.
37:42Ophelia Peppa.
37:43Good girl.
37:44I knew we'd get there.
37:47Come on, missus.
37:48It's really important to get a name change,
37:50so I'm really glad we've managed to get that done before school.
37:53Come on, then.
37:54Hello.
37:55Is it Ophelia Peppa or Rats?
37:57It is.
37:58She's very excited.
37:59Nice to meet you.
38:00Are you coming into school?
38:01Come on.
38:02Come on, right.
38:02Ophelia, let's go.
38:03Ophelia went in absolutely fine.
38:05Just like a normal day.
38:08She was, yeah, she was absolutely fine going in.
38:10She really surprised me.
38:11I thought she's not going to let go of my hand, but she did.
38:13I'm confident that she's going to be all right.
38:16I'm not, though.
38:17I'm missing her already.
38:19Can you tell me about who's in your family?
38:22Chester.
38:23Chester.
38:24And Ellie.
38:26And Ellie.
38:27And Ellie.
38:27And Daddy.
38:28And Daddy.
38:29And...
38:30So there's three children that live at your house.
38:33Am I right?
38:38Do you want to get your running gear on?
38:44Faced with a tsunami of competitiveness in the house...
38:48They're not running a tyre.
38:50Noel has decided to act.
38:52Time to see who is all mouth and no trousers.
38:56Or skirts.
38:57So we're going to race each other.
38:59Bragging rights are everything here,
39:01even for those who should know better.
39:03No point entering to come second, is there?
39:05It's not about the winning, Noel.
39:07It's about taking part.
39:08No, it's all about winning.
39:10Right, stopwatch.
39:14Right, out of us four, then, what order is it going to finish in?
39:17Josh, then me, then Matt, then Dad.
39:19Wow, Dad used to run.
39:20I know he did, but he stopped.
39:22I'm just getting into my prime now, Oscar, as you'll see.
39:25Time to go big or go home.
39:27He pulled a muscle balling up.
39:34Well, how long is it?
39:35100 metres.
39:37One Radford who wasn't expected to show, just has.
39:41Oh, you're there.
39:43I had to, like, drag myself out and do something for the kids.
39:47I have kind of locked myself away a little bit, I think, because obviously everything's so different.
39:52However, I knew that this is the new start.
39:56It's really nice to have Sophie down.
39:57It doesn't matter how old they are.
39:59You know, they're still your kids at the end of the day, aren't they?
40:00And you worry about them, no matter how old they are.
40:04I think Sophie's all cried out now.
40:06I think the best thing we can do is just treat Sophie and the kids normally.
40:10It's really good for me, because it gets me out of the house, and it gets me doing something rather
40:15than just being cooped up at home.
40:17Right, Sophie, what do you think you're going to do it in?
40:18100 metres?
40:19I think I could probably do it in about 13 seconds.
40:22You're going to do it in 13?
40:2313, yeah.
40:24What, what do you mean?
40:25Usain Bolt does it in nine.
40:26I'm, like, nearly as fast.
40:28Well, well...
40:29Sergeant!
40:30Hey, Mum's doing a warm-up class.
40:32Come on, shake it, shake it, shake it!
40:35Today is about sorting out the arguing.
40:38All the little ones are going to do their race, and then the older ones are going to do the
40:42second race.
40:43In control of the stopwatch is Tilly.
40:47I'm the start-the-race lady, and the end-the-race lady, and the timer lady.
40:52Just remember, if I cross first, Tilly, knock a few seconds off.
40:55That'll do.
40:59You join us for the under-14s 100 metres classic, some of the finest athletic specimens Morecambe has ever seen.
41:06Couldn't make it, so we let this lot have a go instead.
41:10Go!
41:16So the kids race, Leo, Archie, Daisy, and Casper, they shot off.
41:21Daisy was winning, or was it...?
41:23Daisy and Casper.
41:25And then Leo and Archie sort of lagging behind.
41:30Daisy! No, Casper won that one.
41:32Daisy, I won it!
41:33I meant you!
41:34I meant me!
41:34I'm not going!
41:35Who's this?
41:37And then you, you'll walk and run in with Heidi.
41:41We crossed that finish line, though.
41:42You did, eventually.
41:45It's the last event of the day, the one we've all been waiting for, the veterans race.
41:51So at school I was very athletic, yeah.
41:53I was third in the district at hurdles as well.
41:55Sophie, how long ago were you last at school?
41:57How many years?
41:59Fifteen years ago.
42:02There's over 130 years of experience on that start line.
42:06No, hang on!
42:07Flag!
42:08Oh, my God!
42:09This is going to be one of the smoothest professional races that you are ever likely to see.
42:14Ready, set, go!
42:18What was that extra word she said?
42:19Oh, my God!
42:20Just be on time!
42:24They are veterans, after all.
42:26Let's give them one more chance.
42:28For Sophie, she's had such a tough time.
42:30I think this is written in the stars that she's going to win this race.
42:39Hi.
42:40Oh!
42:43Yes!
42:46Josh is fastest, Radford.
42:48Closest followed by Max.
42:49Then there's a bit of a distance for me.
42:51And then Sophie.
42:51Always last!
42:53She may have finished last, but Sophie is today's real winner.
42:57I'm going to realise that since having children, I'm no longer at St. Ed.
43:02It's definitely really, really nice to have such a unique and lovely family during such a difficult time.
43:09So they can't make things right, but they definitely do make everything so much better.
43:14I was in front of you and then you both ran into my lane.
43:16When you are an elite athlete...
43:18Can you wait until everybody else's lane?
43:19No, in his own lane.
43:20It's all in your lane.
43:21I did.
43:22It's hard to accept that you're just plain lost.
43:25No more.
43:27My family, they've literally just been there.
43:29Been there for me, basically.
43:31And that's all I've ever wanted.
43:32Yeah, it was good laugh, though.
43:32Yeah, it was good.
43:33Bye, darling.
43:34Love you.
43:35I think seeing her laughing and joking and having a good time has been really nice.
43:40Absolutely fantastic.
43:41Every single one of them in their own little ways as well.
43:45So in conclusion, when there's growing pain, laughter is the best medicine.
43:50Oh, my God.
43:51Oh, my God.
43:51Who writes this stuff?
43:56Life was much simpler when you're a child.
43:58Next time.
43:59When you grow older, your life is more, I guess, stressful.
44:04Josh has had a funny turn.
44:05Says he can't breathe.
44:07I never would have guessed I'd have the problems I have now.
44:10It's hard to say, like, oh, I'm struggling.
44:12He's stopped accessing life outside of the home.
44:15That would qualify a diagnosis of agoraphobia.
44:18I do hope that me doing this does give people courage to also open up and ask someone for help,
44:26I guess.
44:28The Radfords are back new next Sunday at 8.
44:30And if you or someone you know has been affected by any of the issues raised in tonight's programme,
44:36please go to channel5.com slash helplines for information and support.
44:41It's the family dispute that's made headlines.
44:44So who's telling lies?
44:46With an exclusive interview with Rebecca Luz, the Beckham feud is brand new next.
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