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00:16This is the promo party for Sugar Ape's Vice Issue.
00:20The bat was down there for boot tubes and pubes.
00:23This is Nathan Barley for Trash Bat.
00:26Ned Smanks, Rufus Onslapped, Sugar Ape Crew.
00:30So what's the fucking concept?
00:32Right, yeah, well, the idea, yeah,
00:33was to make it look like these models have been molested in a magazine office, yeah?
00:38When actually that's sort of what was really happening.
00:42Yeah, only because, like, we're all in on it, yeah?
00:44It isn't.
00:46Except because we were actually touching them, it kind of is.
00:51Yeah, I touched two of them.
00:55I'm not going to be up for it, though.
01:02Are you still hung up about...
01:05Yes.
01:07I'm not going to be up for it, though.
01:09All that news are out for the people of the place.
01:13It makes the world seem to run around.
01:16That hands are out for the play.
01:19I'm not going to be up for it, though.
01:27Oh, God.
01:29Is this the men's?
01:30Am I the men's, Luke?
01:31No, I promise, babes.
01:32Sometimes it's loaded.
01:36You're Mandy from the Sugar Ape Shoot, yeah?
01:39Yeah.
01:40Nathan Barley, like, uh, his trash bear.
01:44I don't remember. Sorry, was I all over the place?
01:47No, no, no, have you.
01:48I'm completely out of control at the moment.
01:50Really?
01:51Yeah, absolutely no idea what I'm doing.
01:53No idea at all?
01:53No.
01:55Do you want a drink?
01:57Okay.
01:59Michael fucking Jackson.
02:10So?
02:11Look, you really don't want to drink with me.
02:13I'm quite fucked up.
02:14Yeah, I do.
02:15Fucked up's great.
02:16I'm well fucked up.
02:17No, I'm really fucked up.
02:19Hit me.
02:19Look, you really don't want to know.
02:20I can take it.
02:22Bring it on.
02:23Oh, I have Renovar syndrome.
02:25Yeah, really?
02:26What's the problem?
02:27You know, the monkeys that fuck each other all the time.
02:30Brilliant.
02:31And?
02:32My uncle fucked me when I was eight.
02:39I'll kill him.
02:40I mean, he didn't.
02:41I just thought he did, which is like doing it to myself.
02:43But Mommy said that's worse.
02:47Yeah.
02:48I mean, I don't even have an uncle.
02:51Oh, what?
02:54I mean, I'm in music therapy for it.
02:56Huh?
02:57My therapist, she gets me to write songs about uncles
03:00when we record them.
03:01Oh.
03:02Wow.
03:04Let's call it all.
03:05I am your neighbor.
03:07Give it up.
03:08Shake it, shake it, shake it.
03:10Shake it, shake it.
03:13Shake it, shake it, shake it.
03:15Shake it, shake it like a part of the road, bitch.
03:17Yeah, shake it, shake it.
03:20You should make a video.
03:23Really?
03:23I've got a production HQ just around the corner.
03:26It's well brown.
03:27Yeah?
03:28You free tomorrow at 2 p.m.?
03:30Yeah.
03:36All right.
03:38Listen, I've got to go.
03:40Can you let me 20 quid?
03:42It's just that I've lost my bag.
03:44My other bag.
03:45Of course.
03:46Yeah.
03:48Can we make it 50?
03:4950?
03:50No sweat off my balls.
03:53All right.
03:53Well, I'll see you tomorrow.
03:55Yes, you will.
03:56It's all over and I've been on my knee.
04:01Just every river can be out.
04:03Get a whole drunk and finger in the side.
04:19hawkwind.
04:20Hawkwind.
04:21No!
04:28Hawkwind.
04:29Oh dear.
04:30Well, I hope we haven't upset absolutely everyone.
04:35For the news, I'll do an interview at six.
04:41Good party, Dan?
04:44You're leaking.
04:48Erm, can I...? I need some money.
04:52Probably.
04:54Can I do a feature?
04:57But, Dan, last time I had to write it for you because you went a bit...
05:03I'll do it this time. I need the money.
05:06You know the stray scene?
05:08Straight-on-straight gay action. Quite hilarious.
05:13Happens in working-class family pubs like the Grey Line. A lot of builders.
05:19Straight-on-straight?
05:22Keeps families together, apparently.
05:25OK, I'll write about that.
05:28Do it, then write about it.
05:31Do it.
05:33Toss off a builder, then write about it.
05:38Ashcroft goes stray for pay.
05:44Fifteen hundred quid.
05:48I was going to offer you two thousand.
05:51Hm.
05:59Extra money.
06:01Now.
06:06What are you doing for Christmas?
06:16Hm.
06:19Well, I better go and earn your money.
06:25You're leaking.
06:28Yeah, erm...
06:29I lost my key. Can I borrow yours?
06:31What happened to yours?
06:32No.
06:35Hey, preach!
06:37What are these for?
06:39Nothing.
06:41Fuck you later.
06:43Fuck you later.
06:52I'm about to ease a smile into your totally gorgeous mush.
07:01Yeah?
07:04You know those Albanian hookers that cancel for your film?
07:08I think I might have found a replacement.
07:11She's this fucked up model, right?
07:13And she was abused by her uncle.
07:15Right.
07:16Only she hasn't even got an uncle, so it's much worse.
07:19And she's written a song about it.
07:21And she's willing to perform it as an interlude in your film.
07:24This is a coke head from last night.
07:26She's actually got bonobo syndrome.
07:29Yeah, the monkey thing?
07:31My film is about people with real problems, Nathan.
07:34Yeah.
07:35Her only problem is she had the whole selfridges back when she was five.
07:39And you're really against people just being given stuff, yeah?
07:42Yes, I am, actually.
07:45What, like three cameras and edit gear?
07:51That is totally different.
07:53Is it?
07:56Well, what do you want to do?
07:58A video.
08:01Ed's done us this storyboard.
08:04That's Mandy.
08:06That's her cot.
08:08And that's her uncle.
08:11He's ashamed.
08:21Hey, mate.
08:22Thanks.
08:23Would you like any food?
08:25Uh, no, thanks.
08:29Left the wife at home, eh?
08:31Um, I haven't got a wife.
08:35You're not gay, are you?
08:38No.
08:38No.
08:40I don't know.
08:41I'm so sorry.
08:46How are you?
08:49Can I just get one?
08:51What are you doing?
08:53He's not in one.
08:55We're down the line.
08:57You have to be here.
09:02There's a lot of excitement.
09:05There's a lot of excitement on the other area.
09:12You all right?
09:13Yeah.
09:16Need to it, are you, mate?
09:21Yeah.
09:23But don't worry.
09:24I'll help you.
09:29It's not easy.
09:31It's true.
09:33But it helps.
09:35Yeah.
09:44Okay.
09:50All right, you gorgeous mess.
09:57Man, this is Claire.
10:00Hi.
10:01Hi.
10:02Listen, Nathan, sorry, can I have a 20 for the cab?
10:06No problems.
10:07Big tip, yeah?
10:11Can I use your toilet, please?
10:13Just through there.
10:25She's well-traveled.
10:31Ah, that hurts.
10:42Can you take the glove off?
10:46Please?
10:53It's better.
10:55It's better, yeah.
10:59Faster.
11:03Yeah, faster.
11:06Go on, go on, faster.
11:22Thanks, man.
11:26What's your name?
11:27No.
11:28Oh, please.
11:32Excuse me.
11:33Dan Ashcroft.
11:35Shit.
11:36Um, not now.
11:39Let me get you a drink, Dan.
11:42No.
11:43Come on.
11:44Look, I'm doing this for a magazine.
11:47Yeah, I am.
11:51Don't fight, Aetan.
11:54Is it Aetan?
11:55Is it Aetan?
12:18Bad to have a bad uncle
12:22Bad to have a bad uncle
12:27Pain, pain as a monkey
12:31Pain, pain as a monkey
12:33It works
12:35I needed, needed a friend
12:37It really works
12:39To help, help you to mend
12:42But I found friends with the band
12:47With this experience I have
12:50Do you have a bank, mate?
12:52You are such a chalkhead
12:55I am trying to stop
12:57Go on, get it up your beak
13:08Nathan, what is this saying about London's underclass?
13:14They're not all ugly
13:18Bit jealous, Claire?
13:20What, of a sniffer dog in a miniskirt?
13:23Makes your legs feel a bit chunky
13:26She's so coked up she's probably stopped menstruating
13:28Oh
13:30Do you reckon?
13:33Is that what you're after?
13:35A lone thug?
13:38That, no
13:41Come on
13:42That's just
13:44You are ill
13:45You should get rid of her
13:50Now you're jealous again
13:52I mean it
13:54Still jealous
13:58It's a shame
14:00Try and nip it in the bud
14:02Really, Claire
14:04Makes you lose your looks
14:08Your face has gone sour
14:22Hi
14:22Good too?
14:24Yeah
14:26Yeah
14:27You know that
14:28That 20 quid
14:30Could I
14:31Have it back?
14:33Can I keep it, please?
14:35Well, it's
14:36It's just that I've
14:38Given you 270 quid
14:40Yeah, I will pay it back
14:40I promise I will
14:46What if
14:49You pay me back now
14:53Without money
14:57What?
14:58You mean like give you a blowjob?
15:02No
15:04I could put your willy in my mouth and blow it
15:06No
15:08You think it's bad?
15:09It's bad, isn't it?
15:10No, I know it's bad
15:11It's a bad idea
15:12No, no, no
15:12It's a good idea
15:13No, it's bad
15:14I know it is
15:14I mean I shouldn't do
15:15No, no, no
15:16You should
15:18Really?
15:19Yes
15:22So, do you want to
15:25All right
15:26Oh
15:53You sure you're all right?
15:55Yeah
15:56What have you been doing?
15:59I
16:00Hi
16:01Hi, Claire
16:02There's a news crew filming upstairs
16:07What's that about?
16:09Jonathan arranging controversy
16:19She's 13 years old
16:24So she's
16:29That's why I said
16:31Ben, can you bring that?
16:33Great
16:33Cool
16:34In a bit here
16:43Well, are you OK?
16:45Nathan, is Mandy still there?
16:47Sort of
16:49Don't let her leave
16:50She's perfect for my film
16:52OK
16:53She's a child on coke
16:55Hmm?
16:56She's 13 years old
17:01Nathan?
17:03Nathan?
17:10I've got to go
17:12I'm coming up now
17:15Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck
17:17You've got to go
17:19You can't tell anyone
17:19Just don't say anything
17:22Quickly, out the window
17:23Out the window
17:23Out the window
17:24Oh, shit, no
17:25In there
17:25In there
17:27With this experience I had
17:30Shh
17:41All right?
17:46Where's Mandy?
17:47She's gone
17:48You said you'd keep her here
17:51I couldn't
17:52She just went
17:52Well, where's she gone?
17:53She's just
17:57Mandy?
18:00Yeah
18:25Windy, which is typical of this time of year
18:27Only works
18:29And there will be funding
18:31Can you plug it in?
18:32I'm watching the weather
18:35There might be storms
18:36And this building's got loose roof
18:40And it's only held on by one screw
18:42Nathan?
18:43I need to use the monitor
18:45Six o'clock
18:45This is six o'clock
18:47Thank you
18:51Right, Mandy
18:53I'd like to find out
18:54How someone so young
18:56Can get into such a state
18:59Okay
19:01You take a lot of drugs, don't you?
19:03Yeah
19:05And what?
19:06How do you pay for them?
19:08Well
19:10Have you ever done anything for money?
19:13Yeah
19:13Right, that's great
19:15I think that's enough now
19:16Because, you know
19:17We don't want to exploit
19:20Children
19:21Nathan
19:22Please
19:23Get out of shot
19:26Get out of the way
19:34So, Mandy
19:35You've done things for money
19:37Yeah
19:37Like what?
19:40I've given blowjobs
19:42Right, I think we should definitely
19:43Because I'm feeling this is wrong
19:45This is not right
19:46We shouldn't be doing this
19:47It's exploitative
19:48And it's wrong
19:49Nathan
19:50I'm surprised you're not
19:51You're not turning off the camera
19:53Nathan
19:54If you don't like it
19:55Then leave the room
20:02Oh
20:03Right
20:07Um
20:08Go on, Mandy
20:10I just
20:12Needed some cash today
20:13So I just
20:14Gave this bloke a BJ
20:15All right
20:16Fire
20:17Abandoned shoot
20:18That's an electric shot
20:19No, but there's
20:20A wire
20:20There's fire
20:21There could be fire
20:22I'm on the telly
20:23He spoke to the editor
20:24Jonathan Yeah
20:25Printing pictures of topless 13-year-old girls
20:28Is illegal, isn't it?
20:29Would be if they were 13
20:31Well, how old are they?
20:33Over 18, et cetera
20:35And can you prove that?
20:37Have you read it?
20:38Of course
20:39Even the bit here
20:42That says our models are six years older than their stated age
20:47So why say they were 13 in the first place?
20:51So you're not 13?
20:52No
20:53Presumably it makes it
20:55She isn't 13
20:55I'm 18
20:56She isn't
20:57That completely blows my story
20:58It's brilliant, brilliant, brilliant, brilliant
21:00Oh, yeah, really?
21:01It's brilliant
21:01Let's pretend she's 13
21:03Yeah, let's pretend
21:04It's just a big joke, isn't it?
21:07Yeah, it is
21:07It's great
21:08Why?
21:10When she gave me a blowjob
21:11I thought she was 13
21:12And thrown away
21:37Nathan, as far as I'm concerned, that is a blowjob off a 13-year-old girl
21:41All right?
21:44No
21:46Nathan got a blowjob off a 13-year-old girl
21:50Well
21:52No
21:52Not
21:53All right, Zips
21:55Nathan got a blowjob off a 13-year-old girl
21:58Not
21:58Hang on
21:59Claire
21:59There's no way
22:01No way
22:01What's a no way, yeah?
22:02Just
22:03Harley got a blowjob off a 13-year-old girl
22:05That is well no way
22:09How do you pull that off?
22:13That's brilliant, though
22:17Claire's idea
22:21Wise munch
22:23Nice
22:23Mate
22:24Nice
22:24Thanks
22:30Bad to have a bad uncle
22:50It's a shortcut
22:54But I found friends with me bad
22:59With this experience I had
23:15Bad uncle
23:17Bad uncle
23:18Bad uncle
23:19Bad uncle
23:20Bad uncle
23:26Bad uncle
23:27Matt, you rapist
23:27How's it fucking go, Phil?
23:30I'm cool
23:31I've been splashing a few tonsils
23:33Yeah, guess the age
23:35I'll go over the tonsils, yeah
23:39Younger
23:41Younger
23:43Illegal
23:46Technically a Polanski
23:49The fucking teen
23:5113
23:5313
23:57Absolutely
23:58fucking awesome
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