- 3 weeks ago
In this episode of Essence Now, show host, Makho Ndlovu and our favorite Essence Editors recap all of the Essence Now highlights from 2017.
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00:00Welcome to Essence Now, the hottest digital live show for black women.
00:18I'm your host, Makon Dovu, and today we're taking a festive look at the year's biggest
00:23and best moments from Essence Now.
00:25Can you believe that 2017 is almost over?
00:27Like, where does the year go?
00:28Now, remember, you can talk to us using the hashtag Essence Now or by emailing us at EssenceNow at Essence.com.
00:35Now, we can't have a holiday party without our Essence fam, can we?
00:39So, joining us in the studio are Essence.com Senior Lifestyle Editor, Charlie Penn,
00:45Essence Entertainment Director, Corey Murray,
00:47and Senior News and Culture Editor for Essence.com, Christina Coleman,
00:51and, of course, our ear to the social media streets, Kayla is here.
00:55Hey, ladies.
00:56Hey, boo.
00:56Y'all look so good.
00:58Feeling festive.
00:59Yes.
01:00Now, if you're new to Essence Now, we aim to cover the full range of the black woman's experience,
01:04from news to fashion and beauty.
01:07But the topics that have folks talking the most are celebrity interviews.
01:10And without a doubt, the person whose interview generated the most buzz was love and hip-hop star,
01:16Jocelyn Hernandez, Charlie.
01:18Now, the decision to sit down with Jocelyn wasn't an easy one for us and created a lot of debate within the office.
01:23So, talk to us about why some of the editors were initially hesitant about it.
01:28Okay, Mako, to be honest, some of us, well, actually, I'll speak for myself personally.
01:32As a love editor, I believe in healthy imagery, healthy, you know, that's what we need to see on screen.
01:38And I didn't think Jocelyn's relationship with Stevie J is healthy in any way.
01:42And, you know, here at Essence, I felt like we only needed to promote healthy relationships.
01:46Absolutely.
01:47So, I was a little bit like, uh-uh, not for that.
01:49They've had their ups and downs.
01:50Exactly.
01:51They've had their ups and downs.
01:52Corey, you were team Jocelyn.
01:54Why did you think it was a good idea?
01:55Okay, I'll be honest.
01:56So, I stopped watching Love and Hip-Hop, but I was a die-hard fan of those first two seasons.
02:01And I liked Jocelyn.
02:03I really did.
02:04The Puerto Rican princess, there's something about her.
02:06I mean, in all her messiness, she was fun.
02:09And I think when you interviewed her, one of the takeaways I took was when that moment she cried.
02:13Remember that?
02:14That was big.
02:15But I think, but I really listened to what she said, the fact that she's being judged and people don't know her.
02:20And I mean, and maybe I feel like, you know, as an entertainment director, I know reality TV, a lot of it is scripted.
02:26So, I know a lot of that stuff was put on her, and it's about shaping her story, per se.
02:31But I think she had a real moment with you when she realized, like, y'all don't even really know who I am.
02:35Corey, I did not expect that to happen.
02:37I know.
02:37That was such a genuine end, like, in-the-moment situation.
02:41All right.
02:41Well, not only did Jocelyn open up to us, but Queen Latifah gave us a little tea on the Girl's Trip sequel.
02:48And Tina Campbell, well, she told us that when it comes to her support of President Trump, I should what I should.
02:54Here's a look back at our best celebrity interviews from 2017.
02:58The Jocelyn that I was, yeah, I did come from the background where I came from, like, you know, the way I grew up.
03:08My dad died of an overdose.
03:09So, it's a lot of things I went through that people really don't know.
03:13Yeah.
03:14And I stay strong while the questions is being asked.
03:17Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm, mm-hmm.
03:20I can feel the sincerity, yeah.
03:22I can feel the sincerity coming from you.
03:24You don't have to cry.
03:25We're family, Jocelyn, you know.
03:27But what is that, what are you feeling?
03:29What is, what is the, what is bringing the tears?
03:32What makes you feel sad?
03:35You know, because I feel like, I feel like a lot of people judge before they even get to know me.
03:40Do you feel any pressure about having other women around him, or are you sort of comfortable with that?
03:46Absolutely not.
03:47I mean, I completely trust him.
03:4999% of the time, I'm there.
03:51He wants me there.
03:53But we don't have trust issues.
03:55Oh, that's so awesome.
03:56All right, during your relationship with Gucci, he was incarcerated for over two years, and you've been credited for being his ride or die.
04:03Yeah.
04:03What did you see in Gucci that made you stick with him?
04:05Actually, he was incarcerated for three years.
04:08I saw so much in Gucci that no one else saw.
04:12You know, he's extremely charming.
04:13He's super respectful.
04:14I feel like whenever you're in a relationship with a man, they have to respect you as a woman.
04:19So he was worth waiting for.
04:21I think you had said something like, let's give Trump a chance.
04:23Do you still stand by that, and what are your thoughts on him?
04:25Let me tell you what I really said.
04:27Tell me what you said.
04:27What I really said is, if those of us who are calling ourselves Christians, I wrote that letter out of place of frustration from what I was hearing at churches across America.
04:36And I'm thinking, this man is not our God.
04:38And God has given us instruction for this man, which is to pray for him.
04:42So me saying I stand with him means I pray for him.
04:44Even now, I disagree with almost every decision a man is making.
04:48But I still pray for him because he took an oath to represent this country.
04:51And we can say he's not my president.
04:53He's still the president of America.
04:54And God gave us a responsibility to pray for him.
04:57So I pray that someone in his cabinet, someone that's in that on Capitol Hill, can have some kind of influence with him to hold this man responsible and accountable for the decision that he made to run and represent the country and make decisions.
05:11That's for the greater good of the country, because I don't think that that's what he's doing right now.
05:14So my position still is to pray for him, to hope for the best, to resist and be angry and all of that kind of stuff.
05:19That ain't helping nobody.
05:20So I'm not going to be mad at the president and be mad at everybody else.
05:24I'm going to fight the devil, who's the real enemy behind everybody that's acting a fool.
05:27And I'm going to pray for those that's acting a fool that hopefully God would help the fool to come out of him so they can make better decisions.
05:33I hope so.
05:33I know, Erica, you have a morning show.
05:35I'm going to add him to the prayer list.
05:36I'm going to fight him for his death.
05:38I'm going to add him to the prayer list.
05:39I'm praying for impeachment.
05:40That's what I'm praying for.
05:41I just don't think he's equipped for the job.
05:43Amen.
05:43This is the last one.
05:45Okay, quote, I don't want to be labeled gay.
05:46I want to be a human who loves humans.
05:48I'm tired of being labeled.
05:49I am American.
05:51I am not African-American.
05:52Is that still so Raven-Symoné or is that not Raven-Symoné?
05:56That is so Raven-Symoné.
05:58I am an American for the last 400 to 500 years my family's been here.
06:03And we have, along with everybody else that came over through slavery, have integrated.
06:10We have integrated and built this country along with many other types of cultures.
06:16And we should be called an American with the same respect as somebody that came over as
06:21well because the real true Americans, you know.
06:24Yeah, right.
06:25So everybody, that's a different thing.
06:28Everybody should be called by their origin of country.
06:31So if you're white, you should be called European-American.
06:34Why do you just get the word American?
06:35Or if you're this, you should be called, it should be equal for everybody.
06:39Okay, so you define, so American would be the appropriate term, right?
06:42So you wouldn't.
06:43For me, I'm an American.
06:44Yes, I have African ancestry.
06:46Yes, I have European ancestry.
06:48But my family's been here for about 500 years.
06:51How long do I have to be in one country before I'm claimed an American?
06:54So recently, Monique's remarked on her podcast about the success of Girls Trip, saying that
06:59you and other stars should be millionaires because of it and that black women in general
07:04are paid less in Hollywood.
07:05What are your thoughts on that?
07:07Well, we are.
07:08I mean, women are paid less, period.
07:11There's nothing different than what happens in the world.
07:13Women tend to be paid less than their male counterparts.
07:16So I do agree with her in that sense, you know.
07:19And it's just something we keep having to, we just have to keep fighting for.
07:24I think that we can always, we go hard.
07:27You know, my partner, Shaquem, and I, we don't just take what we're offered.
07:32You know, we always push it further.
07:33And we realize what our worth is.
07:36But I also realize that we can create these, we can create this content.
07:40If you really want to get paid, make it yourself and put it out and own it.
07:45That's always been our attitude.
07:46Own what we create, you know.
07:48So we don't have to just ask for a paycheck.
07:51But I think it's always something that needs to be pushed because with the success of Girls' Trip, we're talking about a hundred million plus movie.
08:00We will see, we should see the benefit of a movie that makes that much money.
08:04For sure.
08:06But you keep pushing.
08:07You don't give up.
08:08You just keep pushing.
08:10Yeah, yeah.
08:10And of course we've talked about this on the site.
08:12But will there be a Girls' Trip sequel?
08:15What's the deal?
08:16Girl, hells yeah.
08:19You ask me crazy questions now.
08:22No, we're waiting for it.
08:24We're just waiting for the word.
08:26Just wait for that block in the schedule that we got to block out because it's definitely going to happen.
08:30Okay, so this story involves a lady who says that she had a baby.
08:35I know.
08:35I'm rolling my eyes already, too.
08:37Listen, Linda.
08:37Girl, you already know where I'm going.
08:39She says that she had a baby, fathered a child while you were with Vin.
08:43What is going on with that?
08:44Is there a paternity test that's pending?
08:45What is happening?
08:46Like, you realize?
08:47We realize.
08:48Okay, so here is the thing.
08:50The only reason why I chose to address it was for it to not come, like, become a thing.
08:57You know what I mean?
08:58Because it's a fictitious story.
09:01The night before my wedding, my husband was over Tony's house.
09:04He was very afraid, of course, like every other guy, right?
09:09And no, I don't even know this lady.
09:12I don't know this beautiful child and obviously, or somebody on Facebook's child.
09:18Yeah, yeah.
09:19But my husband, even if he did step outside of my marriage and I took him back, you would know about this.
09:28You're watching our Essence Now holiday party as we look back on 2017's biggest moments.
09:36I'm your host, Malkon Dofu, and I got all my girls around me.
09:39Now, we just look back at our most popular celebrity interviews, but sometimes we like to have a little fun with our favorite stars.
09:45You know, see a little more of their personalities.
09:48And Charlie.
09:49Or did we see another side of power star Rotimi this year when he stepped into the steam room?
09:55For those who missed it, what is the steam room and why was Rotimi's addition so freaking hot?
09:59So in the steam room, you know, we turned up the heat on the fellas and we asked them the questions that we really want to ask them when we were like, you know, that's my crush or whatever.
10:08But the fans loved it because Rotimi was looking like Rotisserie.
10:11He's not.
10:12Yes, okay.
10:13A whole meal.
10:14A whole meal.
10:15A whole meal.
10:17And his answers were real but sexy.
10:20And I think we got to know another side of him online and we were all here for that.
10:23The social media responses, Taylor, were amazing.
10:26A lot of social media responses.
10:28Rosalind Harris on YouTube says, this mother effer said, look at me.
10:32I'm more pregnant just hearing it.
10:33Okay.
10:34Erica Chanel Spicer says on Facebook, I used to think he wasn't attractive, but I think he kind of grows on you.
10:39His swag makes him sexy.
10:40Back to YouTube.
10:42Cinta Hall says, probably should not have watched this at work.
10:44LOL.
10:45And lastly on Facebook, Ladilio says, ever since he got Julio killed, I can't stand his ass.
10:50Even when he isn't being Dre.
10:52LOL.
10:52Look at me, he said.
10:53Hashtag power.
10:54Someone was triggered there.
10:55But I don't know what happened.
10:57Spoiler alert.
10:58Hello.
11:00We haven't called out this holiday.
11:02Right?
11:02Rotimi is Nigerian and African men are hot.
11:04So let me just put that out there.
11:06Well, if you missed it, right?
11:08If you missed it, here's the full version.
11:09The full version is on our YouTube page.
11:11But in the meantime, here's just a little taste along with some other fun moments we had to celebrities this year.
11:18Eee.
11:18Eee.
11:21What's something sexy you'd whisper into a woman's ear?
11:24I think the sexiest thing during sex you could say is, look at me.
11:30Like, look me in my eyes.
11:31Look at me.
11:32And I think that's probably sexy.
11:33That connection right there is a different type of connection.
11:37So, what do you wear to bed?
11:40Nothing.
11:41God bless your boy.
11:42You know what I'm saying?
11:43I forgot mine to the car now.
11:44You know what I'm saying?
11:45I don't wear nothing today.
11:46So, which new edition song inspired the name of another R&B group?
11:50Oh, come on.
11:52Wow.
11:52No helping him.
11:53No helping him.
11:54No helping him.
11:55I hope I get a question that he's in.
11:57Oh, you strike it out already.
11:58Who did Johnny replace in New Edition?
12:01No one.
12:02Name another group Johnny was part of.
12:05LSG.
12:06What was the name of New Edition's 1996 reunion album?
12:09Home Again.
12:10Finish the line.
12:11Mr. Telephone Man.
12:12Something wrong on my line.
12:13All right.
12:13What's Bobby's middle name?
12:15Bobby.
12:16What year did Bobby marry Whitney Houston?
12:19Ooh.
12:20What's the name of Ralph's number one solo hit song?
12:22Sensitivity.
12:23Name the new edition group member Ralph had a double wedding with.
12:26Ooh, a double wedding?
12:28Ronnie.
12:29Johnny.
12:30What boy group was new edition modeled after?
12:33Jackson 5.
12:34What's Mike's middle name?
12:35Bivens.
12:36Nope.
12:37How did BBD describe their music?
12:40It's hip-hop and R&B screwed out in the pot.
12:45Are you ready?
12:46Tiana, are you ready?
12:47Ready?
12:47She ain't ready.
12:48Go.
12:49Okay, I'm going to pick you.
12:49She ain't ready.
12:52This looks like a...
12:52She can't draw.
12:54Oh, a claw?
12:58This looks like...
13:00Oh, the claw's going out now.
13:02No, it ain't no joke.
13:03You can't speak.
13:04You can't speak.
13:04Oh, it's a person.
13:05It's a face.
13:06It's not a face.
13:07Okay.
13:08Is that hair?
13:09No, it's not hair.
13:10What is that?
13:11Tiana, you can't speak.
13:12Okay.
13:12The burns.
13:13The burns.
13:14Okay.
13:14A beard.
13:17A beard.
13:17Tiana, you can't talk.
13:18You can't talk.
13:19Okay, skip.
13:19Skip.
13:19Go to the next one.
13:20We got to get...
13:20Oh, wow.
13:21You just have to get at least one.
13:22Skip that one.
13:23Wait.
13:23How do you draw?
13:24Okay.
13:24You can't talk.
13:26Tiana, if she talks again, I'm getting 10 points.
13:28What is this?
13:29Oh, is that a gun?
13:30Tiana, you talked.
13:31Okay, fine.
13:31Okay, just give me one.
13:32Give me a good one.
13:33I know you can do it.
13:34That looks like a slow-dried.
13:35What is that?
13:35Time's off.
13:36Oh, my God.
13:37That's Florida.
13:38That's Florida.
13:39What was that?
13:40Okay, everybody, wait.
13:41What is Florida?
13:42So, what's this right here?
13:44That looks like a...
13:44What is that?
13:45Miami.
13:46What's this?
13:47Heat?
13:48Yes.
13:49Oh, okay.
13:49Well, that's a bummer.
13:52I know it would have been good.
13:53Button about for that.
13:55That looks like garbage.
13:57Okay, and the last one is a classic romance.
14:00So, listen.
14:01Ah.
14:02Love, Jones.
14:03We just celebrated the 20th anniversary.
14:04The pressure.
14:04So, let's roll the clip.
14:06Okay.
14:07And do they call you daughter to the spinning pulsar?
14:10Or maybe queen of 10,000 moons?
14:14Sister to the distant yet rising star?
14:18Is your name Yemiya?
14:20Oh, hell no.
14:21It's got the VO shooting.
14:22Yes!
14:24Of course.
14:25Okay, let's go.
14:26And the name of the game is called Can He Hit It?
14:29And it, we mean.
14:31Can he hit it?
14:31Can you hit it?
14:32It's a note.
14:33This is your performing at Essence Festival.
14:35We're going to play some clips of fellow Essence Festival performers.
14:38Okay.
14:38And you have to try to hit some of the same notes.
14:40Are you gang?
14:41Oh, man.
14:42This is going to be tough.
14:42With your own version.
14:44Oh, no, no.
14:44It's going to be good.
14:45It's going to be good.
14:45Okay.
14:46So, the first one is from our girl, Solange.
14:48Oh.
14:49Here we go.
14:50Away, away, away, away, away, away.
14:57Away, away, away, away, away.
15:04Oh.
15:05That's my falsetto.
15:06Can you get it one more time, please?
15:08It's like rays in the sky.
15:11Ah, ah, ah.
15:13Yes.
15:13If only you knew.
15:16If only you knew.
15:19So, here's how it works.
15:20We're going to play a line from your classic song, If Only You Knew.
15:24And then I'm going to ask you a revealing question.
15:26So, for example, If Only You Knew, my favorite color is, and then you would finish this.
15:31Okay?
15:32Sounds good?
15:32All right.
15:33So, let's cue the first piece of music here.
15:36If only you knew.
15:41If only you knew.
15:46I cannot cook this dish.
15:49Uh, rice.
15:50Really?
15:52Rice, oatmeal, and grits.
15:55Really?
15:56I can't.
15:57Norma has to cook them for me when she comes to my house.
15:59What was the name of Danity Cain's first single?
16:02Uh, uh, we've had a gun.
16:05We didn't think that them girls don't do.
16:07Tom, Tom, Tom, Tom, you were so close.
16:09Showstopper.
16:10Showstopper.
16:10What was the name of the Dan mother sent to whip Danity Cain into shape?
16:15Uh, I don't know.
16:16It was Jason Diva Williams.
16:18Jason Diva Williams.
16:19Yes.
16:20Diva.
16:21Oh, yeah.
16:23Perfect, yeah.
16:23What was the name of the recording studio where you recorded your debut album?
16:27Daddy's house.
16:27Yay.
16:28Which Make and the Band member fell into some bushes after a night of too much partying?
16:32Robert.
16:33Name all members of da band.
16:35Chopper, Ness, Sarah, Babs, and Daila and Daila and Daila and Daila.
16:39Time's up, time's up, time's up.
16:40Okay.
16:41Which Make and the Band contestant better known, became known for spitting that hot fire?
16:44Daila and Daila and Daila.
16:47That's right.
16:48Which Day 26 member panicked while parasailing in the Bahamas?
16:52Oh, Mike.
16:53No.
16:53No, Robert.
16:54Robert.
16:55During your Making the Band finale episode, what's the song you all took turn singing?
16:59Uh, Perfect One.
17:00Exclusive?
17:01Exclusive.
17:02Oh, yeah.
17:02I don't know.
17:03Thanks.
17:06You're watching a very special holiday edition of Essence Now.
17:10We've got drinks, treats, good friends by our side as we take a look back at the year's
17:15best and biggest moments here on our show.
17:17I'm your host, Makon Dovu, and I'm joined by my girls, Charlie Penn.
17:22Corey Murray, Christina Coleman, and Kayla Rodriguez.
17:26Y'all look so beautiful.
17:27Now, to say this year was a big one for activism is an understatement, and Essence Magazine chose
17:31to honor women in the movement with our very first Awoke issue.
17:35Now, Corey, you helped to put this issue together.
17:37Yes.
17:37Were there any special behind the moments that you can share with us?
17:40Yes.
17:40At the, we did two photo shoots, one in Los Angeles, one in New York, and in Los Angeles,
17:44I was interviewing Shonda Rhimes, and, you know, I'm talking, talking, asking questions,
17:49and I said, oh, something, something about April rain.
17:50And I said, well, you know, she's here.
17:53She was, she's in the makeup.
17:54She's like, she's here.
17:55Oh, wow.
17:55April rain is here.
17:57And I'm like, Shonda Rhimes is, wow.
17:59Like, she had a fan moment.
18:00So she left, well, we finished our interview, and then she went, and they had a little girl
18:04moment for her walking on set.
18:05That is so beautiful.
18:06So Shonda Rhimes talks the talk.
18:08She, like, supports women.
18:09Yes.
18:09We love that.
18:10And speaking of being woke, our girl, Christina Coleman, gave us one of our most memorable
18:14moments in our Kitchen Table Talk series when she got into it with writer Rich Jesviak.
18:20Now, Christina, talk to us about this conversation that you have, Rich, about racism.
18:24What happened, girl?
18:26You know, we were talking about if white people, how do we talk to white people about race?
18:30This was right after Charlottesville happened.
18:32And so we were going back and forth.
18:34And my stance is, you know, being in the movement, being an advocacy journalist, I've been on
18:39the front lines.
18:39I've been in Ferguson.
18:40I've been protesting.
18:41And at that point, I was frustrated.
18:43And I told the other black journalists and activists at the table, I don't feel like I
18:47need to put my black body on the line at this point.
18:50Right now, it's time for you to talk to your racist cousins about what's going on.
18:53Yeah.
18:53And he didn't necessarily agree, which is fine.
18:55These are conversations we need to have, and they're going to be uncomfortable.
18:58Listen, the tension came when I was trying to explain to him, and he kept interrupting
19:06me.
19:07And as an ally, which we were also talking about, allyship, you need to be able to give
19:11us, you know, a platform and make sure that, well, not a platform, because listen.
19:15An opportunity to speak.
19:16Yeah, an opportunity to speak.
19:18And he just wasn't letting me speak.
19:19Ooh, y'all, it got so tense in that room.
19:21We were all like, ooh, all right.
19:23You know, that's what this thing is.
19:25No, no, I was there.
19:26Let me see that.
19:26Now, whether it was confronting racists, post-Charlottesville, or DJ Envy opening up
19:31about cheating on his wife, Gia, or the Me Too conversation around sexual harassment,
19:35here's how we covered the news and issues you cared about this year.
19:42I don't foresee myself having a conversation with a Klansman in a variety of ways.
19:48I don't live near any of them, but I don't want to talk to somebody that hateful.
19:52But you have to.
19:53That's the thing.
19:54So, I mean, are you suggesting that I call a Klansman and talk to him?
19:57Do what you have to do.
19:59Because I've had these conversations and it doesn't work.
20:02That's why I relate to your hitting the wall thing.
20:03For us to walk up to a Klansman and say, hey, let me explain why I'm a human.
20:08Right.
20:08Why my black life matters.
20:10Right.
20:10And, you know, versus you calling a Klansman and saying, hey, bro, like, you know, black
20:15lives matter and let me tell you why.
20:17Then the question becomes, then how do we then push that forward?
20:20Or is there?
20:21We don't.
20:22Because if everyone takes that same position, then nothing will get done.
20:24I mean, yes, you don't have to go down there and say, hey, Mr. Klansman, be good.
20:27These are people, too.
20:29But start with your uncle.
20:30Start with your grandma.
20:31But I do.
20:31Yeah.
20:32I'm not related to Klansman, but I do have these conversations.
20:36Yes.
20:36But I'm saying it's just important to keep doing that.
20:39Yeah.
20:39I mean, you do.
20:39I agree.
20:40But, like, what about the 50, 100 people who ask me what I can do?
20:43There's also something else in, like, white allyship that I find that I come up against
20:48is that people take it really personally.
20:51And so, like, even when you say you positioned yourself in the way that you were like, but
20:54I do.
20:54I'm just talking about my life experience.
20:55I know, but for, I mean, like, at the broader conversation, it's like.
21:00I mean, we're talking personally, though.
21:02Yeah, I get it.
21:02But you also keep interrupting me, which is also, allyship 101 is just to listen.
21:07You've been very open about, you know, your struggles with infidelity and the stuff that
21:11sort of went on in your marriage.
21:13How did you get over that?
21:14How do you rebuild as a couple after going through something as traumatic?
21:17G-O-D.
21:18God.
21:19Absolutely.
21:19I mean, I think our faith has everything to do with it.
21:23Everything, 100%.
21:23You know, I'm not going to say I wasn't into church and God before, but when that incident
21:29happened, it just opened our eyes as a family, not just me and my wife, but our family, to
21:33the point where we pray every morning before I go to work.
21:36You know, at 5 a.m. in the morning, I wake up everybody and we pray.
21:38You know, when I come home before we go to sleep, we pray.
21:41You know, everything in our family is based on our faith now.
21:44And, you know, as a man, I made stupid decisions.
21:47And, you know, luckily we were able to get over those decisions, but we were able to get
21:52over it because of our faith, because of, I think, God putting people in our lives that
21:57really changed our lives.
21:58Whether it was Gia's best friend, who's a preacher, or it was Tyrese who came into our
22:03life, who I really didn't even know that just happened to call me.
22:06Tyrese gave you good advice?
22:07Not only did Tyrese give me good advice, Tyrese heard me on the radio and heard the pain
22:11that I was going through when he was going through that time.
22:13And I didn't know him, he called, and he became kind of like our counselor.
22:17Wow.
22:17Where he would call my wife, he would come, and I mean, he sang for my wife one time,
22:22you know?
22:22Was that hard because he wasn't married at the time, correct?
22:26Nah, it wasn't hard.
22:27It was, Tyrese was so genuine.
22:29Okay.
22:29And he was trying to, as much as he was a dog at that time, he was making me a better
22:35man and making our relationship a better relationship.
22:37I wonder if you realize the cost we pay for loving men like you.
22:42You continue on.
22:43We pay with our bodies, sometimes with our lives, and even in that trauma, we still find
22:48ways to sow deeper into the love we have for you, hoping it will get better.
22:53Wow.
22:53That statement is so true for a lot of women.
22:56Now, has your ex-boyfriend, who you wrote about in the article, has he read this piece?
23:00And what are his thoughts?
23:01I don't know.
23:02You don't know?
23:02I haven't talked to him.
23:03I don't, because if it was for him, I have all of his contact information, and I could
23:10have sent it.
23:10But it was really for me to say, like, how do I move beyond this hurt?
23:16Like, how do I move beyond a space where I'm listening to an album and beginning to feel
23:22some kind of way, right?
23:23And so moving forward required me to be honest, and it required that I said, I don't like what
23:31you did.
23:31When I read Candace Pease, I was like, you know what?
23:34I'm not waiting for an apology from any of my exes who did me wrong, but I'll sure take
23:38that call and say, you know what?
23:40Because you know that hurt is still, it's not affecting my life, and I've moved forward.
23:45But I can't say that it ever goes away, the sting that you feel from helping a man walk
23:51through a journey that he, and then when you get there, he's like, thanks for the ride.
23:54Everyone is buzzing about this latest R. Kelly scandal.
23:58As we mentioned earlier, the singer is, quote, unequivocally denying BuzzFeed's claims that
24:03he recruits young women to be a part of a cult.
24:06Chuck, let's start with you.
24:07As a parent of a young daughter, what do you think about the parent's statement to BuzzFeed
24:12about how they trusted R. Kelly?
24:13I mean, I think it's ridiculous.
24:16I mean, it's just completely laughable.
24:19It makes me smile that there could even be so stupid, and it's not even funny.
24:26A few years ago, I wrote a story for another publication about this as a parent.
24:31I used to have a fatherhood column, and, you know, I believe in protecting my daughter at
24:37all costs, and I think other parents prioritize other things above their child's well-being.
24:46And I also believe that if R. Kelly were accused of sexually assaulting little boys, this would
24:56be completely different.
24:57Let's talk about the differences between how black accusers and white accusers are treated.
25:02How does that work?
25:03It's drastically different, right?
25:05So, you know, I've said it a hundred times, sexual assault doesn't know any race, class
25:09or gender, but the way we respond to it does.
25:11And so we can see that in the case of R. Kelly and how all his accusers are black girls, and
25:18he still has a prominent position in our community.
25:21And so there's also the notion that because of racism, the various oppressions that we
25:26operate under, black women have to almost be complicit in their own abuse in order to survive.
25:31If you've been following the news, you've heard all about the case of Kanika Jenkins.
25:36She was attending a hotel party in the Chicago area when somehow she got separated from her
25:40friends and ended up dead in a basement freezer.
25:44Do you think that this should be a deeper investigation after the release of these photos?
25:47Do you think it's enough to reopen the case?
25:49I think that what's going to happen now is that the police that are investigating are
25:54satisfied with what's been done in terms of the investigation.
25:59I think what is going to continue, I think the family is going to have their own independent
26:03medical examination, and there's going to be more investigation during a possible civil
26:08lawsuit against the property.
26:10Okay, so Natalie, your Black and Missing Foundation deals with bringing much-needed awareness to
26:16missing persons of color.
26:17Was there anything that her friends and family could have done differently from the time she
26:20went missing to the time her body was discovered?
26:24Well, first and foremost, we want to say, you know, condolences to the family and our thoughts
26:29and prayers are with the Jenkins family.
26:31But from what we read, her family or her mother reached out to law enforcement at the very
26:36beginning, asking them for help in searching for her.
26:41And that is something that we ask family members to do.
26:44You have to reach out to law enforcement, and you need their help to help, you know, find
26:48your missing loved ones.
26:49So we think that they did it right by reaching out early, asking for help.
26:57It's an Essence Now holiday party, ladies.
27:00We excited, we excited.
27:02So much fun.
27:03Now today, today we're celebrating the holiday season with a recap of our best and biggest
27:08moments in 2017.
27:09I'm your host, Makone Lovu, with our very own Christina Coleman, Corey Murray, Kayla Rodriguez.
27:15And unfortunately, our girl, Charlie Penn, had to bounce a little early, but we're still
27:20here having a good time.
27:21Now you just saw the best of our news coverage this year, but sometimes things happen that
27:25make all of us say WTF, which leads us to one of our most popular segments, Slade or Shade.
27:30Now, ladies, what would you like to Slade or Shade from this year?
27:33Christina, I'll start with you.
27:35Okay.
27:36I mean, can we do a perpetual Slade or Shade, like forever to Trump?
27:40Because he is making, he's doing some real irreversible damage to our country.
27:45But if I were to hyper-focus on Essence Now, it has to be Tina Campbell.
27:51Yes.
27:51Okay.
27:51So we're shading her.
27:53We got to shade her.
27:54Corey.
27:54I'm sorry.
27:56So I'm slaying Issa Rae's Twitter feed.
28:01I loved it this year.
28:02My favorite tweet this year was going back to the Remy Ma, Nicki Minaj situation.
28:07And she said, Nicki, don't meek this up.
28:09Yeah.
28:10I still laugh at that.
28:11It's so genius.
28:12It was.
28:13And then my second runner-up is I'm reading for everybody black.
28:16Right.
28:16I'm reading for everybody black.
28:17I know that's right.
28:18All right.
28:18Now let's roll it.
28:19Here are our best moments from Essence Now, Slade or Shade.
28:24Did the Hurt Babe video leave you feeling empowered or is the whole thing just sad?
28:30On the count of three, Slade or Shade?
28:32I couldn't wait.
28:33Shade.
28:33You really didn't wait.
28:34I didn't feel sad.
28:36Okay, I'm going to start with Khloe because she was red D.
28:39I was so red D.
28:39Red D.
28:40First of all, I don't even know why she would go and put herself in a situation and not be super cute.
28:45Like you see on your ex-boyfriend, that high ponytail bun should have been Slade, honey.
28:50That's the shade right there.
28:50You always got to look good in front of your ex.
28:52Why are you doing her like that?
28:53No, because you got to let him feel the heat.
28:55That's true.
28:56Okay?
28:57That little squiggly part in the back, she got up and left.
28:59No, baby, fix your edges, come back and snatch his face off.
29:02That's what you're supposed to do.
29:02Okay.
29:03Okay.
29:03Always look good for your ex.
29:05Are Tyrese's latest shenanigans a Slade or a Shade?
29:08All right, let's see what y'all are saying.
29:09Shade, Shade, Shade.
29:11Okay.
29:12Michelle, I feel like you just want to jump in.
29:14What are we getting on?
29:14Child support?
29:15What is he doing?
29:17Relax.
29:18Perhaps trying to reach you for it.
29:18Like a Xanax or a glass of Pinot Grigio, a massage?
29:22Like, why is he so extra?
29:24Calm down.
29:25Black father?
29:26Really?
29:27Ugh.
29:29I don't even understand.
29:30Okay, for anyone who says it's too much, I don't know.
29:32It really should not be a revolution to see a black woman owning her body.
29:36I feel like Nola Darling is so important in this era because this is one of the few times
29:40we see a black woman that is sexual and not sexualized.
29:44The latter part meaning that her body isn't here for male consumption.
29:48You know what I mean?
29:48It's not here to be on a leash of someone else.
29:51So I like that she's owning everything, and I like that as black women, we are seeing
29:55like a full kaleidoscope of ourselves on television.
29:59I'm shading hope because it's easy for someone with as much wealth as he has to tell us what
30:03to do with the wealth we don't have.
30:05Okay, look, I'm all for supporting black-owned businesses, but my morals mean everything to
30:10me, and I stand up for women.
30:11I'm black and I'm a woman.
30:13So if I don't agree with someone's views, I don't have to support their business just
30:16because they're black.
30:17I agree with Charlie in a lot of ways, right?
30:19I mean, I think Hove was wrong in saying that there should be a blanket contract for...
30:24I still don't have title.
30:26It's not that good.
30:27So I...
30:28Boop!
30:29Shay!
30:29Yes, I did!
30:29You're holding up the right card!
30:31But so like, I don't...
30:33Just because Jay did it doesn't mean that we should, you know, get into it.
30:36And also, if you looked at the sneakers that this man is trying to sell for $450, they
30:42are ugly.
30:42So I'm not going to support you for some $450 I could get for $12 from Shaq at Walmart.
30:47You should walk BET's red carpet with his adorable eight-year-old daughter, London.
30:53Both of them were rocking Crystal Face masks, and some felt the fashion statement was a nod
30:57to his hit song, Mask Off.
30:58But others felt it was entirely inappropriate for his daughter to wear the mask, considering
31:04the song's lyrical content.
31:05You know, I think we got to fight the right battle.
31:10Okay.
31:10I think mask off what it means, what it represents, as far as the chorus is concerned.
31:15We're not going to get into the lyrical content.
31:16But I thought it was like, it was a cute moment.
31:18Okay.
31:18I also think that when Brad and Angelina were flaunting black babies as props, we didn't
31:23really go after them.
31:24Not black babies as props, though.
31:26Okay.
31:27To pick the right battles.
31:28Just when you think he's going to leave, bam, Lawrence gives Issa that good old stroke.
31:33Well, was Lawrence being super petty for playing with Issa's emotions, or was Issa wrong for
31:38not appreciating Lawrence when she had him?
31:40Panelists, let me see those panels.
31:43All right.
31:43Was that insecure quickie, a sling, or a shing?
31:47I'm kind of tired of the idea, the misnomer, that women can't have sex without it meaning
31:54something.
31:55Like, you know, I can get my rocks off, too.
31:58Like, I'm not, not everybody is going to emotionally, you know, drain me, and I feel committed to
32:04them.
32:04That's not how we work.
32:08You're watching The Best of Essence now, our very special holiday party edition.
32:13Now, if today's the first time you're watching our show, welcome.
32:16We air right here every Tuesday at 3 p.m. Eastern.
32:20All right.
32:20Now, let's keep this party going with a look back at some of our favorite fashion, beauty,
32:24lifestyle, and musical moments from 2017.
32:43Back like I never left.
33:04I got my mind fixated on finding freedom.
33:06I ain't thinking about missing a step.
33:08Real rap prodigy.
33:09Still an anomaly.
33:10Frequently frequent in past times when I was trying to be.
33:12You're having it all.
33:14How long are you going to stay for?
33:18We got some things we need to catch up on.
33:22Let's go somewhere where we just...
33:25I don't want to be that lie to make you second guess.
33:31Who I'm representing, no, I'm not perfect.
33:35No, I'm not the same to confess.
33:40I just want you to see that I'm trying.
33:44And no, it's not a game.
33:46But I ain't going to lose no sleeper for what people say.
33:50You're watching a holiday party edition of Essence Now.
34:12I'm your host, Makon Lovo.
34:13And y'all, it's been so much fun looking back at this year's best moments with our girls,
34:17Corey Murray, Christina Coleman, and Kayla Rodriguez.
34:20Now, before we head out, we also want to shout out Edible for providing us with today's cookie dough,
34:25which comes in oh, so tasty flavors like birthday bash, milk and cookies, and peanut butter cup.
34:31Yum.
34:32All right.
34:33Now, if you missed any of today's show and you want to see all the best moments in all their full glory,
34:38head on over to our YouTube channel.
34:40We'll be on hiatus over the holidays.
34:42I know we'll miss you guys so much.
34:43But we'll be back Tuesday, January 9th at 3 p.m. Eastern.
34:47Thanks to you, our wonderful viewers, for watching us all year long.
34:51And ladies, thank you so much for joining us today, right?
34:54This has been so much fun.
34:56Seriously, what are we toasting to for 2018?
34:59Christina, since you're at the end, I'll start with you.
35:00What are we toasting to?
35:02We are toasting to resistance.
35:06Yes.
35:06Always.
35:07Resist.
35:08And black women.
35:09Absolutely.
35:09We're just playing all the time.
35:11All the time.
35:12Cheers to that, Corey.
35:12Cheers to that.
35:13I'm going to toast to making a plan for 2018 and following through.
35:17I know.
35:18That's right.
35:19Yes.
35:20Toast to good health and good life and this great, amazing job.
35:23Oh, my gosh.
35:25Kayla, what are you toasting to?
35:26Toasting to another blessed year alongside the people we love and the people we love to work with.
35:30But wait.
35:31We're also toasting to Mako.
35:33This is their first year hosting, Essos Now.
35:36Yay!
35:36So we all toast to Mako because you're doing an amazing job.
35:40And we want to ask you, too, what would you toast to?
35:43Oh, my gosh.
35:44I'm toasting to this job, seriously.
35:46This job is a dream job.
35:47I said it from the first day and we're however many months in.
35:50And it's such a treat to be around you beautiful, gorgeous black women.
35:53Y'all inspire me so much.
35:54Okay, I'm off my soapbox now.
35:56Now, from all of us here at Essence Now, Essence Magazine, at Essence.com, I want to wish you a very Merry Christmas.
36:03Happy Kwanzaa and a Happy New Year.
36:05Toast.
36:05Cheers!
36:06Cheers!
36:06Cheers!
36:06Cheers!
36:07Cheers!
36:07Cheers!
36:07Cheers!
36:07Cheers!
36:08Cheers!
36:08Cheers!
36:08Cheers!
36:09Cheers!
36:09Cheers!
36:10Cheers!
36:10Cheers!
36:11Cheers!
36:11Cheers!
36:12Cheers!
36:12Cheers!
36:13Cheers!
36:14Cheers!
36:15Cheers!
36:16Cheers!
36:17Cheers!
36:18Cheers!
36:19Cheers!
36:20Cheers!
36:21Cheers!
36:22Cheers!
36:23Cheers!
36:24Cheers!
36:25Cheers!
36:26Cheers!
36:27Cheers!
36:28Cheers!
36:29Cheers!
36:30Cheers!
36:31Cheers!
36:32Cheers!
36:33Cheers!
36:34Cheers!
36:34Cheers!
36:35Cheers!
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