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00:00You're watching Essence Live. I'm your host, Dana Blair, and these are the biggest stories you're buzzing about today.
00:09From Dave Chappelle to David Banner, celebrities are coming out to say that maybe, possibly, hopefully some good things could happen from a Trump presidency.
00:17Even Oprah has joined the call for folks to just relax.
00:20In a recent interview with Entertainment Tonight, Oprah said this.
00:23To hear President-elect Trump say that he had respect for President Obama, it felt that he had reached a moment where he was actually humbled by that experience.
00:35To hear President Obama say that he has renewed confidence in the peaceful transition, I think everybody can take a deep breath.
00:43The Anti-Defamation League, Southern Poverty Law Center, the NAACP, and even some Republicans are criticizing Donald Trump's decision to make Stephen Bannon his chief strategist.
00:56So, who exactly is this Bannon character?
00:58Well, he led Breitbart.com, which is known for championing white nationalism.
01:02Breitbart.com has advocated for a religious test for immigrants.
01:06And, in 2007, his ex-wife testified in a domestic violence case that Bannon didn't want their children going to school with Jewish people.
01:14Meanwhile, Trump himself recently told 60 Minutes that he wants those inciting violence and racism in his name to, quote, stop it.
01:21So, does that go for your chief strategist or not?
01:28Okay, so apparently this is a thing now.
01:30White people are wearing safety pins to show their solidarity with people of color, immigrants, and everyone else who Trump disparaged in his campaign.
01:37But safety pins?
01:38I mean, really?
01:39Hmm.
01:40At a doer of stuff tweeted,
01:41I wear my hashtag safety pin because I genuinely want to show my support for all of our people.
01:46We are one.
01:47Separateness is an illusion.
01:49However, Denise Bennett strongly disagreed on Facebook.
01:52She wrote,
01:52If you're in the presence of hate speak or actions, get your ass up and say something.
01:56I don't have time to be looking for your pin when someone starts getting froggy.
02:00Well, it seems black people aren't the only ones questioning this safety pin solidarity.
02:04One artist and writer says the craze is downright embarrassing, and he's taking his fellow white people to task.
02:09We're talking to him live in studio next and taking your comments on Facebook.
02:13It's Tuesday, November 15th, and Essence Live starts now.
02:25Welcome to Essence Live, Essence Magazine's weekly digital talk show.
02:29I'm your host, Dana Blair, and today's show is jam-packed with good stuff, of course, as always.
02:34Coming up, we'll have Kenya Moore give us the tea on Moore Manor and how she was able to make up with her fellow housewives.
02:39Issa Rae will dish on her hair journey, and we've got a special mystery guest coming.
02:44Hmm, who will that be?
02:46But right now, we have a question for you, Essence Live fam.
02:49How has the election affected your relationships and interactions with your coworkers or your acquaintances?
02:53Any awkward interactions with, say, Trump voters in the lunchroom?
02:57Well, to share your stories right now, use the hashtag EssenceLive or email us at EssenceLive at Essence.com,
03:03and we'll read some of your comments a little bit later on in the show.
03:06Earlier in the hot list, we talked about these safety pins that folks are wearing to show solidarity to minorities
03:11in some crazy post-Trump times.
03:13But my next guest says he's definitely not here for it.
03:16In fact, he recently wrote a piece entitled,
03:19White People, Your Safety Pins Are Embarrassing.
03:20Please welcome artist and writer Christopher Kielty to the show.
03:26I apologize for a little tongue twister.
03:28How are you, Christopher?
03:28Good, good, Dana. Thank you.
03:30Thank you so much for joining us here at Essence Live.
03:32I'm going to go ahead and jump right into it.
03:33Why did you feel the need to write this article?
03:36I think, I mean, I was embarrassed.
03:39You know, to me, I don't understand why a person who wants to show solidarity,
03:46wants to show defense for people of color,
03:48wouldn't adopt one of the movements that's already out there,
03:51wouldn't just put on a shirt or a hat or some icon that says Black Lives Matter,
03:56why this new thing has to be invented.
03:58I'm familiar with the safety pin movement from the UK that followed the Brexit vote,
04:03which was kind of very specifically about protecting Muslim women,
04:07particularly who were being attacked, their hijabs were being pulled off.
04:09Right.
04:10That, to me, is, I think, kind of a good symbol.
04:14Mm-hmm.
04:14It's a little bit more fitting for that movement.
04:16Yeah.
04:17Well, and it says something very specific.
04:19You know, it's opposing something very specific.
04:21In the U.S., what sort of got me riled up was that I saw people really sharing this
04:26as a way of kind of saying, like, yeah, I know racist white people just elected a white
04:31nationalist president, but I'm one of the good ones.
04:34Yes.
04:34Not me.
04:35I'm safe.
04:35I'm a safety pin.
04:36I'm safe.
04:36It was about protecting identity, not taking action.
04:40And you also had a cartoon that accompanied the piece as well,
04:43which we were talking about in the office.
04:44It was very on target.
04:46There were gentrifying neighborhoods, blaming the murder of Trayvon Martin on Trayvon himself,
04:51all while donning this safety pin, if you will.
04:53So how did you become so enlightened?
04:57I had a few people who, activists, people of color, who were very patient with me,
05:04who took the time.
05:05I worked for the ACLU for a number of years, and the director at the Pennsylvania affiliate,
05:11Reggie Shuford, really taught me a lot.
05:14There's another gentleman by the name of Harold Jordan who worked with us,
05:17still is there as a community organizer.
05:20You know, I came in, I grew up with an upper middle class white background.
05:25I went to a public school that I think had five African-American kids in upstate New York,
05:29which I've now learned is one of the most segregated states in the country.
05:32Oh, wow.
05:33In terms of schools.
05:35And so I kind of, I moved into activism being very concerned about LGBTQ rights and freedom of speech.
05:42And it was really some of those people who woke me up to the fact that black and brown people have much bigger problems
05:49than I think a lot of white people are aware of.
05:52And that a lot of us are participating in it without realizing it or intending to.
05:57You know, you certainly have your balance.
06:00Right, right.
06:00But it's not like something that you're, as you mentioned, intending to do.
06:05And so you said there's a lot of dialogue that you participated in.
06:07And so amongst your circle, amongst your contemporaries, how do you handle conversations on, say, a Trayvon Martin or a Philando Castile
06:15when against your, I'm just going to go ahead and say against your white friends?
06:19Like, do you have those conversations?
06:20Because in the black community, we're constantly having these conversations.
06:23Yeah, you know, fairly frequently, often over Facebook, but in person fairly frequently also.
06:31And it's challenging.
06:33You know, there's that term white fragility, which is extremely true.
06:38I've learned a lot more about it in the last couple of days, sort of firsthand.
06:42But, you know, often you're dealing with people who don't realize how motivated the things they say or believe are
06:49by sort of preserving white supremacy, white nationalism.
06:52You know, they think...
06:53And they're certainly not going to claim that.
06:54No, and if you say it, like, forget it.
06:57That's when the conversation ends.
06:59So there almost has to be sort of a really diplomatic way of working your way in.
07:04You know, the Trayvon assassination was particularly challenging because there was so much fake news out there also.
07:11Right.
07:12And so you almost can't have a productive conversation when the person I'm talking to believes
07:18something completely different transpired than what I believe.
07:21And the truth is maybe even somewhere in the middle.
07:23You know, I may have some facts wrong, too.
07:24Right.
07:25But at least it's important that we're having a dialogue.
07:26And speaking of which, we want to hear what you're saying out there on Facebook.
07:29Kayla, do you have any comments that are rolling in right now for this subject or for Christopher?
07:33Definitely.
07:33So people are super vocal right now.
07:35And Natasha Powell says, I love what he's saying about the safety pin is a protection of self,
07:40not a support of any movement.
07:41In regards to your question earlier, what is your relationship with Donald Trump voters
07:46affecting your relationship at work?
07:48Michelle Denis says, it has been strained in the workplace.
07:51LaDonna Felton says, just the racist comments on the news feed, not necessarily in person.
07:57And Terrell York says, safety pins, question mark, no, action works.
08:01That makes a lot of sense.
08:02I want, quickly from you, do you feel that now that we have Trump as president,
08:05it's going to open up the conversation even greater for race?
08:09I hope so.
08:10You know, my hope with this is that people who want to put on that safety pin
08:14take a more active role in challenging other people,
08:18take a more active role in educating themselves.
08:20I think that's what's really going to be productive.
08:22You know, in my view, white people voted Trump into power.
08:25We're the only racial demographic that he won.
08:28We really have to take responsibility for whatever happens from here out
08:31and take responsibility for trying to fix the problem that we created a long time ago
08:37and that we're perpetuating now.
08:38Thank you very much, Christopher, so much for your time.
08:40You're welcome back to Essence Live anytime.
08:42All right, you can read Christopher's full article on the safety pin movement
08:45on medium.com as well as on huffingtonpost.com.
08:49Thank you so much, Christopher.
08:50Keep those comments coming.
08:51We want your stories.
08:52Have you had any awkward or outright racist interactions with Trump supporters?
08:56Let us know using the hashtag Essence Live.
08:59Coming up, our interview with Kenya Moore+.
09:01We've got three Essence-like viewers standing by to try and guess who this mystery guest is,
09:06and that's going to be a lot of fun.
09:07Right now, some of your favorite stars reveal what they'll miss most about the Obamas.
09:18I think what I'll miss most about the Obamas is probably the legacy of acceptance
09:24that they'll be leaving behind.
09:25The thing I'm going to remember the most about the Obamas is how classy
09:30they are and how inspirational they are with bringing their whole family together,
09:36including Michelle's mom, and them being a really good example of what relationship goals
09:42could look like.
09:43I will miss having a statesman in the White House and a leader in the White House.
09:49Barack Obama has been a statesman. I live overseas, so I've seen it firsthand how the world has responded
09:55to such a powerful and charismatic and intelligent president.
09:59He's got thick skin and he's able to take criticism, but at the same time really just take it with grace
10:07and elegance and keep it moving.
10:10And I think that's what I really respect about him as a president.
10:13I'm going to miss President Barack Obama's calm demeanor when in times of craziness and logic.
10:19I'm going to really miss that.
10:21And I'm also going to miss Michelle's passion of just empowering women.
10:27The First Lady is an extremely skilled leader, and they have influence all over the world.
10:34And I will miss the warm hugs I receive right now as an American all over the world.
10:39So, yeah. Thank you. I promise.
10:50You're watching Essence Live. I'm your host, Dana Blair.
10:52And if you're watching us on Facebook, hey.
10:54Oh, and of course, hey to the fellas, too. We see you all out there.
10:57All right, get your DVRs ready because the Real Housewives of Atlanta is back.
11:01Recently, I sat down with star Kenya Moore to talk about the show, her relationship status,
11:06and a few juicy tidbits. Take a look.
11:08We are. We're working things out.
11:10You know, Matt is a great guy. He is a good person.
11:14That is the one thing that stands out from him than a lot of the other men that I've dated.
11:19I've dated some wonderful guys as well.
11:20Right, right.
11:20But some of the jerks, he certainly is not one of them.
11:24Matt's issue is that he's very young.
11:26He's not 30 yet, and he's learning things, and dating me is not easy.
11:32You know, I am, you know, people would think comes with, yeah, I'm a celebrity,
11:37so that comes with a whole set of problems.
11:40He's dating a successful woman, a much older woman.
11:43And so those things really affect a man's self-esteem and just how he copes with everything
11:50may not necessarily be the right way.
11:52And that's what we're trying to work through.
11:54And are you working, like, on his anger issues?
11:56Are you working through that together?
11:58Or how do you handle that?
11:59Because as you mentioned, there's so many young women that look up to you and idolize you.
12:03And what would your messaging be there?
12:05Like, what advice would you give?
12:06Well, I think he definitely is working on them in a professional capacity as well.
12:11And I think that it just depends on where you are.
12:14If a man ever, for me, crosses a line putting his hands on you, that could even also mean
12:20to some people if you feel threatened.
12:22I have in my life been in an abusive relationship, so I know what it looks like and what it feels
12:29like.
12:29And our relationship doesn't feel like that.
12:33I think when he gets angry, he'll hit a wall instead of hitting you.
12:37He'll walk away or things like that.
12:39And so I don't feel threatened in that way.
12:41But I am concerned with the way he sort of throws these temper tantrums.
12:46But to me, that's a sign of immaturity.
12:48What I would say is if a girl is dating someone that makes them, you know, puts his hands on
12:56her or gets in her face or intimidates her, then you should probably leave the relationship.
13:02Do you think that you may walk down the aisle with Matt?
13:05We'll see.
13:06You know, we're trying to figure it all out.
13:10You know, I think that's great, too, that you're keeping an open mind about it and just
13:12taking it because sometimes people rush and can find themselves in a bad situation.
13:17Yes.
13:17I want to transition to more manner.
13:19Yes.
13:20Congratulations.
13:20The house looks beautiful.
13:25Contractors, interior design, all of that.
13:27It's like you had to pick out every single, single thing.
13:30Every finishing, every single thing.
13:32Even my HVAC units, my heating and cooling.
13:35I had to pick exactly the ones that I wanted.
13:37Everything was a choice.
13:39I literally didn't have a front door when I bought the property.
13:42I didn't have flooring, heating, cooling, plumbing, electrical.
13:46I had nothing in that house.
13:47And I actually tore down one wing of it.
13:51Oh, my gosh.
13:51To rebuild it.
13:52Yeah.
13:52Why do you think some of the other ladies hate on more manner so much?
13:55Specifically, we're talking about your neighbor, Sharae, here.
13:57Yeah.
13:57Why do you think that tension is there?
14:00I think she's embarrassed.
14:02It's been over five years.
14:03They fill stadiums in less time.
14:05So it's clearly because she's having other issues, possibly financial issues.
14:10Obviously, we know about some of those things.
14:11They've been in the press.
14:12It's not a secret.
14:13And I think that even though the accomplishment, you have to take note of that, she has gotten
14:20it this far.
14:21Right.
14:22But I think with me having far less and doing it in less than a year, which normally it takes
14:28about that amount of time, I think it's just purely bringing her issues to the forefront.
14:35And that can be extremely embarrassing.
14:37Yeah.
14:37On the cast, which housewife are you the closest with?
14:41Absolutely, Cynthia.
14:43But I've gotten really close to Candy this season, too.
14:45I've always, you know, we've always had a friendship.
14:47But I think now we just have a lot of more intimacy in terms of our conversations and the
14:55levels that we are getting to now, I'm learning her a lot more and she's learning me a lot
15:00more.
15:00And I'm really, I really love Candy.
15:02She's a great girl.
15:03It's been really interesting to see you and Phaedrus to come back together, if you will,
15:07and have a very cordial relationship.
15:09Did that happen?
15:10Was there a lot of work that went into that off camera saying, you know what, let's put
15:13bygones, let bygones be bygones?
15:15No.
15:15No work off camera.
15:16I've not seen her outside of the show.
15:19But, you know, two years of holding on to hate and oh, you said this or you do that.
15:24It's just too much.
15:25I think people have to evolve.
15:27And so it's a testament to how strong two women can be to be able to overcome, to be
15:32able to forgive, and to be able to just move forward.
15:35No one wants to stay stuck.
15:36At least I don't.
15:37No, no, definitely.
15:38What about you and Portia?
15:38What's the status of y'all's friendship?
15:40You know, we've never really had a friendship from the beginning of the show.
15:44I've always been cordial.
15:45We just don't see eye to eye.
15:47I have no problem with her.
15:49I can be in the same room.
15:51I just don't necessarily want to extend an invitation to my home.
15:54Fair enough.
15:54I was really shocked to see that.
15:56I was watching the show, of course, with some of my girlfriends.
15:58I was like, I would feel some kind of way if someone I didn't invite came into my space.
16:01In your home.
16:02In my space.
16:02Yes.
16:02You know, if it was a party.
16:04That's one thing.
16:04That's one thing.
16:05But this is my home.
16:06This is where my energy is.
16:07This is what I wake up to every morning.
16:10And they definitely hate it on my home.
16:12They, Phaedra, actually, and Portia, and Sheree came by unannounced to my home, talking all
16:18kind of crap about it.
16:19So, you know, I just laugh at those girls sometimes.
16:21But it's a pretty bold move to come over to someone's house and invite it to a housewarming
16:26party.
16:26But you handled it very well.
16:27I would like to transition to talk just a smidge of politics.
16:31Donald Trump was elected our president.
16:33Yes.
16:33What were your, what are your initial thoughts on that, our new president-elect?
16:40Well, I think no matter who you voted for, this is our president-elect.
16:43I think we have to support him.
16:46He will be working for our country for the next four years, at least.
16:50And we just have to learn to be more involved, to be more passionate, definitely encourage
16:56other people to vote, and to be more vocal and educated about, you know, the politicians
17:02that we choose in the future.
17:04And he was not affiliated with the crown when you held the crown, correct?
17:08No, I think a few years later.
17:09A few years later.
17:10But you did with the apprentice.
17:11You had a working relationship with him.
17:13Do you feel that he'll be a good president?
17:16I hope that he will be.
17:18Yes.
17:18One can only hope.
17:19That's very nice.
17:21Hey, Boris Kojo here, and you are watching Essence Live with the beautiful Dana, who's got
17:38the same haircut as me.
17:45You're watching Essence Live.
17:46I'm your host, Dana Blair.
17:48And right now, it's time to play a very fun game.
17:50We're calling Guess the Guest.
17:52Here's how it works.
17:53We have three lovely Essence Live viewers who have no idea who our mystery guest is.
17:58Each lady will ask our mystery guest three questions.
18:01At the end of all three rounds, they'll write down who they think our mystery guest is.
18:05Ladies, make sure to pay attention to the questions your other participants are asking
18:10so you don't repeat the same question, okay?
18:12Yep.
18:12Cool.
18:13All right.
18:13Before we get started, I'll give you all one clue to get your detective juices flowing.
18:17So, here's your clue.
18:19Our mystery guest is a singer.
18:21Oh.
18:24Oh.
18:25All right.
18:26Is everyone ready?
18:27All right.
18:27All right.
18:27You ready?
18:28Here we go.
18:29Ashley, you're first.
18:30What is your first question?
18:34Have you released an album in the last three months?
18:40No.
18:42Okay.
18:43Okay.
18:44Amherst is over here just making notes.
18:46It's my beautiful mind over here.
18:48Amherst is second.
18:49Um, what genre of music do you sing?
18:54R&B.
18:56Oh.
18:58All right.
18:59Ravel?
19:00Ravel.
19:00Ravel.
19:01I'm sorry.
19:03Um, hmm.
19:05What was the name of your last album?
19:10Bridges.
19:11Bridges, did you say?
19:12Yeah.
19:13Okay.
19:15She's cheesing.
19:16Okay, so here's round two.
19:18Nope.
19:18No, Sharon.
19:18No, Sharon.
19:19Ashley?
19:21Okay.
19:23Have you been on any reality TV shows?
19:27I have not.
19:28Thanks, sweet Jesus.
19:31What was the inspiration behind the album?
19:34Just like one sentence.
19:37Love.
19:39One word.
19:40I have not done any collaborations with any major rappers.
19:54And if so, who?
19:56Two parts.
19:57She did a two part.
19:58That might be giving too much away, but I have done collaborations with rappers.
20:06Okay, it's the third and final round.
20:08Oh.
20:08Ashley?
20:10Are you above the age of 30?
20:12Oh, that's a great one.
20:15That's good.
20:16That's not fair.
20:18Yes.
20:20Have you been linked to any celebrity artists romantically?
20:28Are you thotting and bopping?
20:31I'm going to translate.
20:32Thotting and bopping.
20:33I'm going to be diplomatic.
20:35I have not.
20:40The vowel is like, you can see the steam coming out of her ear.
20:43It's your third and final question.
20:44Okay, um, how long have you been a major artist?
20:53Uh, over 20 years.
20:5420 years?
20:56Okay.
20:57Okay, that's it.
20:58Did we get a bonus question round?
21:00No, no bonus questions.
21:01That's it.
21:01No more questions.
21:02Write down your guess.
21:03And don't, don't peek at each other's.
21:05One by one, nobody blurred out.
21:07And I'll tell you at the end if and when, if someone was right.
21:11Ashley, you first.
21:13Who do you think it is?
21:14That's good.
21:15That's good.
21:15That's such a good one.
21:17That was good.
21:17That's who we do.
21:18That's who we do.
21:18That's who we do.
21:18Carl Thomas.
21:22That was cute, but that's not it.
21:25There's shade in the studio.
21:26Okay.
21:28And who, and who, and so.
21:29Girl, this is wrong.
21:31Who is it?
21:32Music.
21:33Interesting.
21:33Interesting.
21:34Okay, so before I reveal.
21:36So good.
21:37Celebrity mystery guests, would you mind maybe singing a few bars?
21:40That's what I was going to ask.
21:42They say this is a big, rich town.
21:48I just come from the poorest part.
21:52Bright like city life, I gotta make it.
21:55This is where it goes down.
21:56Oh, yes.
21:59I just happened to come from the poorest part.
22:02You can come around and reveal yourself.
22:04Come stand next to me.
22:05You were right, Ashley.
22:06She was right.
22:08She was right.
22:10Awesome.
22:10Awesome.
22:11Good to meet you.
22:13Pleasure.
22:13Pleasure.
22:14Amaris.
22:14Nice to meet you, Amaris.
22:15Nice to meet you.
22:16And Rovonne.
22:17Happy.
22:17Good to meet you.
22:18Call Thomas.
22:19You had to call Thomas.
22:20Yeah, call Thomas.
22:21Come stand next to me over here, Joan.
22:23I can't sing no more.
22:24I can't sing.
22:25I can't sing.
22:26Oh, okay, okay, okay.
22:27That's what I think.
22:27Thank you so much for joining us.
22:29How are you doing?
22:29My pleasure.
22:30I'm good.
22:30I'm good.
22:30How are you?
22:30You're a good support.
22:31I'm good.
22:32Did you think they were going to guess?
22:33I didn't think so.
22:34You were kind of vague.
22:35I didn't think so.
22:36I didn't think neither one of them would get it, but that's pretty good.
22:39That's pretty good.
22:39Tell us about your new album.
22:40Hashtag, my name is Joe Thomas, and it comes out probably in the stores already.
22:46I mean, the name is basically an homage to my biggest album, My Name is Joe.
22:52So I just released a song called So I Can Have It Back, which is the first single.
22:57I got a song with Gucci Mane, which is called Happy Hour.
23:00I heard y'all talking about that earlier.
23:02Maybe.
23:02Those are fun times.
23:03I'm always talking about Happy Hour.
23:05Yeah, yeah.
23:06Those are good times.
23:06Trust me.
23:07What track from this particular album do you think is your next Joe classic?
23:11You know what?
23:11I got a song called Lean Into It, and I think it's classic R&B.
23:15I think it's the closest thing to what the 90s were at that particular time.
23:20So it's quality.
23:22Awesome.
23:22Thank you so much for being here.
23:24It was my pleasure.
23:24And of course, thank you all the ladies for joining us and for participating.
23:27That was fun.
23:28And being such great sports.
23:30We are going to get you all a copy of Joe's new album.
23:32Thank you, girl.
23:35All right.
23:35Thank you so much.
23:37Coming up, I'm going to check in with you one last time on social media, so be sure to
23:41leave us your shout outs and comments using the hashtag Essence Live.
23:45But right now, here's Insecure star Issa Rae explaining how she learned to love her hair
23:49in our series, My Main Moment.
23:51My mom used to always push me to rock my natural hair.
24:05She was so frustrated with me in high school when I constantly covered it.
24:09She was like, I know your hair.
24:12And if you get a perm, it's going to fall out.
24:15After a while, I was like, Mom, I don't care what you say.
24:16I want to do it.
24:17And this is my choice.
24:19I am 12.
24:20And my hair fell out.
24:25And she was like, I told you I'm bald-headed ass.
24:28Men always come with the sister and the queen, which is fine.
24:33Great.
24:34You know, I say they think I like poetry a lot.
24:37They think that I'm like a cocoa butter queen.
24:39So they always like approach me delicately.
24:41Like, I just want to say you, I appreciate you wearing your hair like that.
24:45You know, I'm like, thank you for your approval.
24:51I love Tiana Parrish.
24:53She's amazing.
24:54Her hair is always on point.
24:56I love Solange's hairstyles.
24:58She just always kills the game.
25:00So I saw Natalie, the Flow Assist video, and she had like a bald head.
25:04And I just thought she was so beautiful.
25:06And I was also working at a job that I was frustrated with and trying to get Awkward Black
25:11Girl off the ground.
25:12I tweeted something like, man, I wish I had an excuse.
25:15Like, I wish someone would just break up with me so that I could have an excuse to shave
25:20my hair off.
25:21And then I was like, oh, that's a funny plot line of like a show or something.
25:26And decided like to tweet that I was going to, or put on Facebook that I wanted to shave
25:32my head bald.
25:33And so all my friends responded like, oh my gosh, do it.
25:37You about to be so ugly.
25:38Oh my God, what if you have a weird shaped head?
25:40And I was like, my friends are terrible.
25:43But I saw how much attention I was getting.
25:46And I was like, oh my gosh, I should use this.
25:48I should shave my head and then do a trailer for Awkward Black Girl where I feature my bald
25:53head.
25:54And that way people who want to see what I look like will also know about this new
25:59show that I'm trying to do.
26:00And so I did it and it got like 3,000 views in a day and I had a bald head and I had a
26:07fresh start and that bald head changed my life.
26:10My bald head changed my life too, Issa Rae.
26:20This is Essence Live.
26:21I'm your host, Dana Blair.
26:22And joining me in studio right now is a woman we hope can get us through these post-Trump
26:26times.
26:27She's the president and CEO of the National Urban League and a lifelong social justice advocate.
26:32Please welcome Arva Rice to the show.
26:34Hello, Arva.
26:34Hello there.
26:35How are you?
26:35I'm fabulous.
26:36Thank you so much for joining us here at Essence Live.
26:38You're welcome anytime.
26:40I'm going to, I don't even know where to begin other than what do you tell those folks who
26:45didn't believe that their vote counted?
26:47Wow.
26:47In this year's presidential election.
26:49Yeah, that's a tough one.
26:50Obviously, it is so incredibly important to vote.
26:53I have friends of mine.
26:54I have a friend of mine who literally didn't leave the house since Tuesday.
26:56He was so upset about this election.
26:59And then I had my 10-year-old niece who, you know, went to bed thinking that she was going
27:02to wake up to the first woman president of the United States after only having known
27:07an African-American as the president and woke up and said, you know, Donald Trump won.
27:12Mommy, do we have to move, you know?
27:13And was very serious in that.
27:15And so I think that the conversation that we have to have with our children is about the
27:19importance of voting, the importance of being involved in this political process,
27:22and the fact that, you know, we're black women.
27:25We're black people.
27:25We're going to get through this.
27:26We're going to get through it.
27:27But this is a time to really get up and start fighting even more.
27:30So how do we hold him accountable?
27:31He's our new president-elect, whether we like it or not as a country.
27:35Now, what's the next step?
27:36Sure, that is true.
27:38The hashtag not my president is definitely, you know, out there.
27:41But the fact is, is that, you know, January 20th, he will be elected as the president
27:45of the United States.
27:46And so we have a responsibility to stay connected and stay involved.
27:49I, of course, want to encourage everybody to be part of their local urban league.
27:53So I'm the head of the New York Urban League.
27:55There are 94 Urban League affiliates around the country.
27:58Whether it's Urban League, whether it's Black Lives Matter, whether it's the NAACP,
28:02whether it's your local, you know, church or mosque.
28:05But we want to have people to be involved.
28:07And that's the most important thing.
28:09Finding out who your local elected leaders are, making sure who your district attorney
28:13is.
28:13The district attorney is so important because they're the ones that make the decision
28:16about whether they're going to charge a little 12-year-old Jamar with something or
28:19else they're going to let it go.
28:20Right?
28:20So it's so important for us to be involved at the very, very local, basic level because
28:24all that feeds up to the presidency.
28:27And so I think that that's the thing that I wanted to focus on the most is get involved.
28:30This is the time to get off your couch.
28:32And those times when you said, oh, I want to mentor somebody or I want to be involved in
28:37somebody's campaign or I want to be involved at the community board, the school board,
28:39whatever level, this is your time.
28:42Do you feel that his election, the election of Trump, has made your job more difficult?
28:48I think that the election of Trump has been incredible.
28:51I started out as I'm the second female to run the New York Urban League in its 97-year
28:55history.
28:56And when I came in 2009, it was literally four months after the Obamas moved into the White
29:02House.
29:02And so people literally said to me, you seem kind of talented, Arba.
29:05Why would you go run an organization that's not relevant anymore?
29:09We have a black president.
29:11We're in post-racist America.
29:14Why in the world would you go work there?
29:17And then unfortunately, we have Trayvon Martin and then we start having all these other shootings
29:21and we have Orlando and we have things that happen in Texas and Minnesota and suddenly it's
29:25you all aren't doing enough.
29:27You need to be more involved.
29:28You need to be more engaged.
29:29So I think that our work right now is difficult, but I think that rather than having to convince
29:35people that racism still has an impact on the community, it's a matter of how do we fight
29:39it and how do we battle it.
29:40Definitely.
29:41Now, a little bit earlier on in the show, we asked you to let us know if you had any
29:44weird interactions with Trump supporters.
29:46Kayla, what are the folks saying out on social?
29:49Very vocal again.
29:51And the comments are rolling in.
29:52Kay Ray says, I was working at an event and one of the moderators made this comment.
29:56With President Trump, this will be the first time a white family has put a black family
30:00out of public housing.
30:02Wow.
30:02Jazz Tim says, I have blocked some Trump supporters regarding their get over it statements and
30:08stance.
30:09Veronica Gibson says, one of my white friends voted for Trump, a dear friend for 20 plus
30:13years.
30:14I told her not to speak to me, text me, Twitter me, inbox me, FaceTime me, Snapchat me.
30:19Don't even look at me for the next four years.
30:21Wow.
30:22All right.
30:22She said, don't even look at me.
30:24And you know, we had Christopher Kilty on a little bit earlier in the show.
30:26And there's a piece in his article that I really liked where he mentioned in social media, don't
30:30necessarily unfriend them, actually have a conversation.
30:33What are your thoughts?
30:33I definitely think that unfriending them doesn't do us any good, right?
30:38I'm originally from Milwaukee, Wisconsin.
30:40And so when I go and look on my Facebook, I have a lot of people from Wisconsin who didn't
30:44say anything leading up to the election.
30:47And then after the election happened, then suddenly, you know, the quiet Trump supporters
30:52have come out.
30:52And it's been particularly true for my sister and my niece and some of the other people
30:55in my family.
30:56And I think that it's important to continue the conversation and continue the dialogue.
30:59First of all, people need to understand how personally the loss of this election for Democrats
31:06is, right?
31:06So it's literally you have had a presidential candidate and now a person who's going to
31:11become president speak negatively about Muslims and about black people and about disabled.
31:16And you voted for him anyways.
31:18And so how are the people who represent those groups supposed to feel in that, right?
31:21And so I think that it's only by person-to-person interaction that people can truly understand
31:26that.
31:26And Facebook is one way of doing that person-to-person interaction.
31:30Thank you so very much, Arva, for just dropping so many gems.
31:33And of course, thank you to all of our guests for coming through.
31:34And of course, you, all of you out there watching Essence Live and all of your support.
31:38If you missed any of today's show, you can catch the replay shortly on Essence.com and
31:42see all of our videos on our YouTube page.
31:44Before we close, we have to pay tribute to Gwen Ifill, who passed away on Monday.
31:48Her contributions to politics and journalism were impactful.
31:52Gwen, for being a role model to black women and girls everywhere.
31:54We salute you, and you will be missed.
31:57I'm Dana Blair.
31:58See you next week.
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