New #year means new weight loss journey, but that doesn't mean a new #starting weight. Amberlynn #continues recording her weight as if she was still on the #89lbs weight loss #journey. She shares her #daily weigh ins and records some of the #meals she eats. She also let's us in on how her #girlfriend #Krystle is doing with her #weight loss since they are on the journey #together. By the end of the week she #records a weight #loss tag, answering #personal questions as to why she is on the journey in the first place.
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LifestyleTranscript
00:00It's 2 p.m. now and we were gonna go downstairs and eat something but her parents were down there playing
00:05a game at the table so I felt kind of like shy or whatever so I just grabbed this thing.
00:10Soft baked oatmeal peanut butter natural valley thing. I guess it's healthier.
00:15I don't know but my um girlfriend's mom got it so I'm about to try that for the first time.
00:19I'm just feeling-
00:20Kind of sad because more than anything I wish we had like fruits and stuff but since-
00:25I didn't go to the store. We don't have any of that stuff. Putting fruit into my protein-
00:30shakes has been one of the best decisions I've ever made.
00:35I'm not a fruit type of gal.
00:40I do not like fruit. I by far prefer vegetables. It's hard for me to get down-
00:45A serving of fruit a day for me is decent. I'm starting off 2014 kind of-
00:50kind of in like a little down mood because I mean that's only 160 calories and that's-
00:55it's not really good to just eat that when you first wake up so I wanted some like fruit with it but we didn't have-
01:00any so it's kind of like- what'd you say?
01:05Well even you know some of the things I put on the list she didn't get. My girlfriend just-
01:10said I should have put it on the list but even so that doesn't mean I'm gonna get what I asked for.
01:15I think she forgot and stuff but- so I'm just kind of like-
01:17I would have made like an oatmeal or something but-
01:20I feel shy doing that.
01:21Oatmeal. She doesn't like oatmeal.
01:22Nope I don't.
01:23Well it tastes exactly like what you think-
01:25it would. A soft-bake oatmeal and peanut butter square. I recommend it for a snack but definitely not-
01:30something to just eat right when you wake up. A long awaited weigh in but I did weigh in too.
01:35So today it is January 1st 2014 and I figured I want this year to be my-
01:40my resolution is to reach 290-
01:459.8 pounds. I think it would be incredible to see that.
01:50Number 2. I feel like I can do this. I really really do. I want to call this resolution
01:55of mine. Melting to my success story. I think it's cute. It's catchy. It's fun.
02:00My weigh in today was 377.0. That's a 43 pound-
02:05weight loss total. But that means I need to lose 77.2 more-
02:10pounds to reach this resolution. I need to do this for my health. I need to do this for me.
02:15I need to prove myself and others that I can lose weight. I'm not just all talk. Because at one point-
02:20I was down 89 pounds and I don't know what happened. Emotions got the best of me and-
02:25food was there and I ate that food and I shouldn't have. I did-
02:30want to talk to you guys about something and that is the fear of extra skin. It-
02:35is a fear that I think might sabotage me and it scares me. It's a physical-
02:40fear like a physical- I feel it in my heart. I don't know what to do. More than anything I want to-
02:45weigh 299.8 pounds. I don't want to wake up one day, step on that scale and say-
02:50wow, I did it. 77.2 pounds to lose in one year is a lot of weight.
02:55It's absolutely insane. I'm just going to try my hardest. I want to try doing 1800 calories.
03:00for as long as I can. If I go out to eat, if they have low calorie meals, I want-
03:05to train myself into choosing those low calorie meals. I feel like there's a way-
03:10behind everything. Like if I go to like a get together, I can-
03:15come up with so many excuses and I can make them sound legitimate. But you know what? I can also come up with-
03:20so many little paths in between each obstacle.
03:25that I can make them sound legitimate as well. So I need to take that more positive route.
03:29always coming up with-
03:30with excuses 24-7. Every year I come up with resolutions and I-
03:35fail. But if I have you guys by my side, I don't think failing is an option. I will be-
03:40telling you guys how much weight I have lost in total because it did take a lot of hard work to-
03:45do that. So I don't want that to be erased. Can watch my last weigh-in video if you guys-
03:50want to know how much weight I gained. Today I weighed in at 369.4. It is a-
03:55I know, but I do not remember what that was. I was expecting-
04:00375. For some reason that number kept popping in my head. It would have been a big gain.
04:05It would have been understandable. But I stepped on the scale and saw 377.0.
04:10And my first reaction was, what? That can't be-
04:15Right. And I have this fear of extra skin and sometimes I think I would rather be-
04:20big than have extra skin. It's- it's- it's really annoying.
04:25I know there's surgeries, but guess what? I have no money. I have no income. I have no-
04:30no job. I have no insurance. I don't have anything. And surgery, I have never had. It's-
04:35terrifying thought. I just wish I could lose weight and not have extra skin. That's just-
04:40how I wish it is. I remember when I was down 89 pounds, I already had loose skin.
04:45Like, it was bad already. I can't even imagine, like, how it would be if I-
04:50I kept losing and a part of me feels like I sabotaged myself subconsciously. What I will be-
04:55doing is MyFitnessPal. They give me a lot of calories to eat, like-
05:002300? I will not be eating 2300 calories. I don't think I need to-
05:05I find that a little extreme. To be honest, I will be eating 1800. For some people-
05:10that's a lot, but for me, it's not. I have not counted calories religiously in-
05:15like, two years, so I'm kinda nervous about how this is gonna go. Also, I wanna add a little bit of-
05:20exercising in. This is what I will be doing. I wanted to show you guys. It is The Biggest Loser-
05:25workout. There is a warmup that's five minutes. There's a cardio level that's 20 minutes. There's-
05:30there's a cardio level 2 that's 10 minutes. There's a cardio level 3 that's 10 minutes. And there's a cool-down that's five minutes.
05:35I know as much as I should, I am not doing the warmup or the cool-down yet. I'm just gonna be doing-
05:40the cardio level 1 for 20 minutes. I'm doing this today, which I-
05:45I'm not looking forward to whatsoever. I wanna just do that as my exercise for right now. Because I wanna-
05:50see myself gradually get better. My face looks a little red. It's because I just-
05:55did this. That was quite the thing and I haven't worked out in a very long time. I recommend this.
06:00It felt good while doing it.
06:05I was 11-
06:1010 pounds when I weighed that-
06:12that much. I don't know if you guys remember that person I told you-
06:15you guys about. That was really rude to me in comments. Well, he's back and he won't stop. I have-
06:20blocked him. But honestly, it's making me rethink my whole YouTube experience. I am-
06:25really tired of negativity in my life. A lot of- I'm not trying to-
06:30be rude whatsoever, but a lot of people on here are very insensitive and I don't-
06:35know why. I've never given anyone a reason to be rude to me. I've never been rude to you guys.
06:40I don't understand it. And then yes, there are a lot of you who are there for me and are nice to me.
06:45And leave me nice comments and message me and stuff. And I appreciate that more than anything.
06:50But still, when you have, you know, people who are very insensitive and who can work-
06:55their words very well, it hurts. It really does. I know a lot of you don't-
07:00know my life, obviously. You only know what I allow you to know. And a lot of-
07:05you say I should get a job and stuff like that. First of all, I would love-
07:10I have a job more than anything. I think having a job will help me-
07:15and more than just being able to help pay bills and for food.
07:20and stuff like that. It'll help me with my weight loss. It'll help me get out of the house a little more.
07:25It'll help me in so many ways that I really want. I really, really-
07:30truly want a job. I cannot get one because I do not have a car. I do not have-
07:35I do not have a license. And I do not have transportation. And unfortunately, where I live, they do not have-
07:40buses. The only people in this house who have a car is my girlfriend's parents, but they were-
07:45they work every single day on the weekends and they use their car. They drive hours away just to work.
07:50That's inspiring all in itself. But I just wanted to let you guys know that right now-
07:55in my life, I am not capable of getting a job because of transportation.
08:00Work at home job. The internet on my laptop is horrific. And-
08:05my laptop is very slow. Jobs wouldn't approve me anyways for that.
08:10I've tried before and most of them you have to pay. And my girlfriend's parents already-
08:15told me that they're not willing to do that because they have seen a lot of scams.
08:20stuff like that, which is totally understandable. So I just kind of wanted to, you know, make that clear and-
08:25tell you guys that-
08:26please stop telling me I should get a job. I honestly just cannot get one.
08:30If it was that easy, I would so have one already. I really want my own income. I want to-
08:35help with bills. Help with food. You know, I want to be able to go with my girlfriend on dates. I want to be able to-
08:40give money to her parents. So I just wanted to say that because it kind of hurts my feelings that-
08:45people think I'm not getting a job just because I'm lazy or something because that is not the case whatsoever.
08:50my girlfriend, she has income. And, um, so I just wanted to make that clear that-
08:55she isn't like me where I have no income whatsoever. Having leftovers for dinner.
09:00And I mean, having a very tiny, tiny amount. I measured all of it. I'm also going to have one of these.
09:05with it. I like to crinkle it in. I just-
09:08crunch. Cause I like to-
09:10I like to have that crunch. So, three of these were a serving.
09:15this is a huge salad for not-
09:20so many calories. And then one of our-
09:22already took a bite. One of the things we made yesterday-
09:25and that's for dinner. And it's less than 500 calories.
09:30Yay! Open faster, faster, faster! I'm coming!
09:35Succeeded.
09:36I just wanted to-
09:40I just wanted to show you what I'm having for my breakfast. I'm having this Belveeta SoftBase.
09:45It's the oats and chocolate. It is so good. And I'm having three-
09:50three pieces of-
09:51it was already made-
09:52I think turkey bacon? I don't even know.
09:55It was only 80 calories for that. So, for both of this is 280 calories.
09:59I've had this book for-
10:00for a while now. I think it's so cute. I'm using it to write down the date, the weight, my loss-
10:05my total loss and pounds to go till 299.8. I just think it's so cute.
10:10It says, keep calm and have a cupcake. Because, honestly, that's like perfect. Like, honestly, when you're-
10:15on a diet, it's like, keep calm and have yourself a cupcake. Just make sure you know what the calories are.
10:20and stuff. Because there's no reason to deprive yourself. Because, honestly, deprive-
10:25motivation just doesn't work. Everything in moderation. And I think that's what's important.
10:30and a successful weight loss. Honestly, honestly, honestly, I think a lot of people can tell you that.
10:35Here I am again with another song recommendation. Tell me what you think.
10:39Hello, everybody.
10:40I am back with another question for you guys. What are your three fears? My first one is-
10:45death. I do fear death. Just talking about it is very-
10:50I don't know. It just does something inside of me knowing that each and every single one of us-
10:55we'll die today. I sure hope we don't die today.
11:00I don't even know why-
11:01I don't even know why-
11:02Okay, each and every single one of us will die.
11:05Eventually, that's the word I was looking for. Knowing that's like the only thing that is-
11:10like a for sure thing in life is very scary. It's like what happens after-
11:15after that, what happens when we die? And not only that, I think another fear right along with-
11:20it is-
11:21how will I die? When will my loved one die? The whole subject-
11:25to me, it is scary. I don't like it. I hate-
11:29I hate-
11:30death. I know some people embrace it so perfectly. I don't know how like that is-
11:35death is like insane to me and I give you props. Death is something I hate.
11:40to hear about, talk about, any of that. So I'm gonna move on to the next one. My second fear-
11:45is diseases. My real mother, she jokes, or she used to, I don't really talk-
11:50talk to her much now, but she used to joke about how I'm a hypochondriac. I'm not.
11:55I'm not at all. She was kind of becoming a hypochondriac and I had to just be like, stop.
11:59I really-
12:00I don't think I am. Diseases terrify me. I don't want diseases. I wanna-
12:05be healthy. I feel like any little symptom could lead to something-
12:10bad. Okay, maybe that is hypochondriac a little bit. I've had a few very bad-
12:15issues happen within my health. Maybe I'll share that sometime. And I literally felt like I was-
12:20dying. Like, it was that scary. Diseases just aren't okay. I don't think anyone deserves to be-
12:25sick of any sort. It's just scary. And then my last fear is heights. It's-
12:30very common. Very common fear. But heights literally make me feel nauseous.
12:35Even, like, when I'm watching, like, a TV show and they're, like, somewhere high and they, like, show it-
12:40I sit there and I tell my girlfriend, whoever I'm watching it with, like, whoa. I felt like I was just there. Like, I just hate-
12:45I hate so much. So those are my three top fears. Death, diseases, and heights. I love to-
12:50know what your guesses are. So what are your three top fears? And please leave a comment down below.
12:55Thank you. And I can't wait to see your answers. Bye. My weigh-in video. Here we go. Yesterday-
13:00I did perfect. I did not eat over my calories whatsoever. I am very proud of my-
13:05myself. And I still had calories for a little treat. I had a cookie with some-
13:10and a very tiny slice of cheesecake. So I did-
13:15I did have calories for that. During my dinner, I did show you guys that I had leftover tacos-
13:20having leftovers for dinner. And I mean, having a very tiny, tiny amount. Normally, with leftovers-
13:25leftovers and stuff like that. I eat way, way, way, way-
13:30too much. And I'm not exaggerating whatsoever. Even when I'm dieting, I will eat way too much.
13:35But I didn't. And I weighed everything. I'm very proud of myself because those little-
13:40things like that prove that I can do this. And as long as I can continue doing this,
13:43then I will reach my goal-
13:45even if it's not in 2014. It'll be in 2015. And it'll happen.
13:50And that's what matters. So my weigh-in yesterday was 377.0. My weigh-in today was-
13:55376.4. So that's down 0.6. At first, I was a little sad because 0.6-
14:00you know, isn't even a pound. I know it's been one day, but I'm so used to my body losing like three-
14:05pounds, two pounds a day. But my body will never be like that anymore. And I need to accept that-
14:10so 0.6 I am happy with now. That means I have lost 43.6 pounds.
14:15in total. And that means I have 76.6 pounds to go in 2015.
14:202014 to make it to my goal of 299.8 pounds. That is a lot of-
14:25numbers. So that is my weigh-in.
14:30I am happy with now.
14:35my girlfriend told me I can choose something online to get-
14:40that was, you know, cheap-ish. I got this from eBay. I cannot wait for it to come in.
14:45It's like a black purse with a cat face. It's so precious.
14:50that I can steal!
14:51It's just a little realisticаний that I've always felt in the end.
14:53taalCC
15:00Isn't that like the craziest thing?
15:01You can go from like super angry to like super happy in like two seconds.
15:05Yeah, legit just sounded psycho saying that, but it's true.
15:10It's true, like I was just in a really upset mood about something and now I feel so much better.
15:15Deep breaths.
15:17Everybody's...
15:19It's...
15:20It's snowing.
15:21It's so pretty.
15:23I can't open the screen because Charlie...
15:25It's snowing.
15:26It's so pretty.
15:27I can't open the screen because Charlie...
15:28It's snowing.
15:29It's so pretty.
15:30I know.
15:31I sound like a little kid in a candy store.
15:32Look how beautiful.
15:33It snows every...
15:35Year here.
15:36Like, I just freaking love it.
15:37Ah!
15:38It's snowing.
15:39It's snowing.
15:40It's snowing.
15:41It's snowing.
15:42Me and my girlfriend are playing sour...
15:45apples to apples.
15:46You have to play with four people, but we made our own version up, so donate.
15:50I have decided to do, like, a little very, like, few second video of my...
15:55Whole body because I kind of want to see how I look maybe...
15:58I don't know, once I'm down 20 pounds.
16:00I don't know...
16:01but everybody's still hanging out here, and I don't know why I'm leaving.
16:03supporting.
16:04I don't know why I'm traveling.
16:05It's fun.
16:06I'm like, I said to have them by the time, come on.
16:08What's up?
16:09What's up?
16:10I like how I'm traveling.
16:11I'm traveling.
16:12I'm traveling.
16:13What's up?
16:14Oh, I'm traveling.
16:15I'm traveling.
16:16I can't see you now, because I'm traveling!
16:17I have to be in the country.
16:18I don't know what I'm traveling I wanna come to do.
16:20I don't see you.
16:21I don't know what I want to be in this community like.
16:23It's a big particular nighter.
16:24I'm traveling.
16:25I don't know what I wanna be in there.
16:26I don't know.
16:32hello everybody um here's my weigh-in for
16:37january 3rd 2014 today was another successful day i did my 1800 calories
16:42i did not exercise yesterday but i did exercise today i decided that i'm going to do it
16:47at least three times a week so so far this week i have done it twice so yay for me
16:52wednesday and now today yesterday i weighed in at 376.4 and today
16:57weighed in at 374.0 which is a weight loss
17:02of 2.4 in one day now before i get into anything else i know
17:07a lot of people a lot of people who think that is unhealthy my only argument
17:12against that is is losing 2.4 as unhealthy as being
17:17370 something pounds i think we all know the answer to that
17:21so that brings me
17:22to me being down 46 pounds in total which i'm happy for it's very
17:27tedious it's very upsetting that i have to sit here and lose 40 something more pounds
17:32even before i am at my lowest weight that means i have to lose 74.2 more
17:37pounds before i can make it to my new year's resolution of 299.2
17:42weight loss is hard for me lately at the beginning it was so easy i
17:47don't know why i feel like maybe i was in a more positive space then i need to be as positive as i can
17:52i'm not gonna lie last night after my snack two hours after i really did
17:57feel really hungry it was like a physical pain 1800 calories is a lot
18:02so i shouldn't how do i word this i shouldn't eat
18:07more than that just because i feel hungry i think the only reason why i feel hungry is because
18:12i'm not used to such low calories in the last two days i've eaten less
18:17less than i would normally in one day so of course i'm gonna feel a little hungry it's not so
18:22snowing anymore but it didn't melt so at least we get to see the beautiful snow right
18:27as much as i do not
18:32want to do this i'm about to work out yay me i have to go downstairs and put a
18:37away all the christmas stuff i am so sad for this i guess that's another little mini
18:42workout within the other workout i did right so i guess that's a positive
18:47workout within the other workout this week
18:52No more Christmas.
18:57No more Christmas.
18:59No more Christmas.
19:01No more Christmas.
19:02What, were you going to do that?
19:04Well now I know I can put something there.
19:06That's what drew me all off.
19:07You can't do that, you can drop something from here and put it over there.
19:08You just can't put that 11 there and take the joker.
19:10Why is it all over there?
19:12What the f*** are you doing?
19:13What are you doing here?
19:14You're here.
19:15I said what?
19:16I'm going to pee my...
19:17I'm going to pee myself.
19:18I'm going to pee myself.
19:19Stop.
19:20I'm going to pee.
19:22What are you doing here?
19:24I haven't really been recording much today.
19:27I'm sorry about that.
19:28I don't know.
19:29It was just because I was cleaning and then after we cleaned and put away all the crystals
19:32and then I'm going to pee myself.
19:33We had dinner, which I forgot to film.
19:35I just had corn.
19:36These butter...
19:37I ordered beans that I am literally obsessed with.
19:39I'll have to show you guys one day.
19:41I don't have any...
19:42anymore so I can't show you.
19:43And it also had like a half smoke.
19:47I don't even know what it was called.
19:48I forgot to show that.
19:49And then after we ate...
19:50What did we do?
19:51We played games.
19:52For literally like four hours.
19:53We will see what the rest of the night holds.
19:55It's already past 9.
19:57We're about to have our late dinner.
19:59That's just how we do it.
20:00We...
20:02I didn't have dinner.
20:03I had lunch.
20:04Sorry.
20:05That's what I had for lunch.
20:06The corn, the buttered beans, and the half smoke.
20:07Right now I'm having dinner.
20:08And after I remember...
20:09If I remember...
20:10I'm not sure.
20:11There's something wrong with me.
20:12Don't ask.
20:13If I remember...
20:14I'll show you guys.
20:15So I'll see you guys later.
20:16Bye.
20:17Bye.
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23:32I have 72.2 pounds to go before I am 299.8.
23:37We just got back from the grocery store and we actually were under our limit by
23:42$25.
23:43Oh.
23:44Dinner time.
23:45Dinner time.
23:47Bye.
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24:00You want this?
24:01No.
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28:52so that's down 1.8 yay I can't believe it like I'm still
28:57going pretty steady I know it's only day five but I mean I'm proud that
29:02I'm still going you know steady like this I'm doing so good
29:07I'm really proud of myself and I never say that so
29:10last
29:12I'm glad I finally can it's just it feels great that means I am down 49.8
29:17total so tomorrow 2 oh wait wait also I
29:22have 70.4 pounds to go total you should be so so proud yourself every pound
29:27you worked for that and you did it and it was all because of you and you should be
29:31proud proud proud
29:32so we will see how tomorrow's weigh-in goes
29:37what is wrong with my hair
29:42cute looking that's cute looking my face
29:47cute looking so currently I'm gonna make a sandwich I'm going to use
29:52a bagel thin that looks like this for 110 calories I'm also making my girlfriend one
29:57gonna put a garlic and herb cheese on it for only 35 calories so that's 145 calories
30:02so far and then I'm going to use a 90 calorie pack of budding original chicken
30:07which is like I said 90 calories so that's only about two
30:12hundred and thirty five calories so I think it's totally worth it and it's going to be delicious
30:17because I've had it before
30:22so I think I'm gonna end my vlog here I will see you guys tomorrow I hope you guys had a great day today
30:27thank you so much for watching and if you aren't smiling smile
30:30bye
30:31this is what we're having for bro
30:32this today it's carefully selected oats that can help lower cholesterol and recently
30:37my girlfriend found out that she has a tiny tiny bit of high cholesterol so we're trying to watch
30:42out for that to the best of our ability for a cup is a hundred calories this is the lowest calorie
30:47of cereal I've ever seen to be honest with you
30:50oh wait
30:51oh yeah okay so one cup
30:52is a hundred calories yeah that's definitely the lowest calorie cereal I've ever seen
30:56protein is three
30:57three I mean fat is two I am more than positive you guys have seen Cheerios before so I don't think
31:02I need to be showing this to you guys this is the milk we are using the vanilla soy milk organic it is
31:0790 calories for a cup six protein 3.5 fat
31:12I don't know what else you guys want to know but I'm pretty sure you can see that but yeah that is what we are eating today
31:17and it looks like so
31:18welcome to my weigh in
31:19if you guys watched my video from yesterday you remember me
31:22mentioning that my girlfriend stayed the same and she was having trouble dealing with it she said
31:27my video helped her when I kind of mentioned her in my other video she stayed the same again today
31:32she weighs herself before me so she finds out her weight before I obviously
31:37and she tells me it before I even weigh in she was very upset I mean I
31:42I know I know I helped her yesterday but I really can't
31:47change the way she feels when she weighs in I wish I could more than anything but I
31:52can't I weighed in yesterday I weighed in at 370.2 and today I weighed in
31:57at 370.2 I stayed the same and I don't tell my girlfriend my weight
32:02and I wait until she watches these videos it's just a little game we do she likes to be surprised
32:07we're downstairs about to have breakfast and I wasn't telling she was telling me that she already
32:12wants to lower her calories because she stayed the same two days in a row she said that
32:17if she stays the same again tomorrow she's really gonna think about changing her calories to eating less
32:22I'm not good with my words
32:27all the time sometimes I am but trying to explain to her that it's
32:32only been not even a week and she's already down two point something
32:37pounds I try to explain to her she doesn't need to lose
32:42weight every single day just because you stay the same even if you stay the same for five days in a row
32:47that does not mean you need to lower your calories yet if you eat more you'll lose weight
32:52I know so many people that it's happened to I tell them up your calories I swear to god
32:57up your calories by 400 and see what happens and they lose weight I mean I love that advice
33:02and that I can give it and when I do give that advice people look at me like I am insane
33:06so when my girlfriend
33:07told me that she wants to lower her calories already
33:12only on day five of our you know our weight loss journey this year I was
33:17shocked I don't want her to do it I really truly don't I do not want her to lower her calories
33:22and I don't want her to feel discouraged you know I stayed the same too and now she knows that watching
33:27us I didn't lose any weight I didn't gain any weight and you know the positive in that
33:32let's say that again I didn't lose any weight I didn't gain
33:37anyway I feel like when you stay the same you need to think about that for a minute as the days go
33:42on you will lose weight babe you will lose weight and Amberlynn you will lose weight
33:47it's okay it's okay to stay the same especially if we are waiting daily it's gonna happen I was
33:52a little sad to see me stay the same already I gotta be honest but
33:57I need to take my advice I need to embrace it I need to know that tomorrow it's gonna be a
34:02better day on the scale I'm really I'm feeling it I'm feeling it in my past with stains
34:07the same I normally get very discouraged kind of like my girlfriend well I wouldn't say she's discouraged
34:12but I kind of feel like how she does normally when she stays the same and normally that day
34:17I messed up really bad I just wanted to mention that because I might be showing you guys on camera
34:22that I'm you know I'm okay with this staying the same but you know point two would have been nice
34:27okay no I'm totally joking but yeah I'm just gonna leave you guys with this a little
34:32uh what do they call it a cliffhanger do I um still stick with my calorie count
34:37do I still stick with my plans that I have for myself all because I stay the same because in the
34:42past I would not so what's gonna happen today that's something that will keep me
34:47guys sticking around right you guys can ask yourself all day today is Anne Boleyn following through
34:52oh my god and you know what you could be telling yourself that you're following through let's see
34:57if I felt fell through with still counting calories and still to do what I need to do
35:02it'd be pretty contradictive if I messed up today right hello everybody here I am with
35:07another question do you like the food meatloaf what I've noticed about the food
35:12meatloaf is that you either hate it or you love it like people who hate it hate it and
35:17they are proud to shout it out high and loud but people who love it aren't afraid to admit
35:22that they love it and they you know they love it and I'm one of them people I do I love
35:27meatloaf I love meatloaf it is probably one of my favorite dinners and I love it
35:32with mashed potatoes and peas oh oh so delicious you guys dislike it please let
35:37me know so my question is do you like the food meatloaf and no I'm not talking about
35:42the the band meatloaf or whoever that artist is hi it's me over here
35:47with with Brian May Brian is vegetarian and he's agreed to sit next to me say hi Brian
35:52I don't even know do you like the food meatloaf yes I'm very strange in the
35:57room this is a very random question but I'm curious so leave your answer down below thanks
36:02I don't know do you like the food meatloaf I don't know do you like the food meatloaf I don't
36:03know do you like the food meatloaf I don't know do you like the food meatloaf I don't know
36:04do you like the food meatloaf I don't know do you like the food meatloaf I don't know
36:05do you like the food meatloaf I don't know do you like the food meatloaf I don't know
36:06do you like the food meatloaf I don't know do you like the food meatloaf I don't know
36:07do you like the food meatloaf I don't know do you like the food meatloaf I don't know
36:08do you like the food meatloaf I don't know do you like the food meatloaf I don't know
36:09You
36:14You
36:19Hi everybody, here I am suggesting
36:24another song. It is F.U. by Marley Cyrus in French, Montana. So, here is another song.
36:29Here is another musical suggestion.
36:34This is F.U. by Marley Cyrus.
36:39F.U. by Marley Cyrus
36:44So, I just kind of wanted to show you guys my snack for tonight. This was
36:49a really good breakfast as well. I do save about 400 calories for a snack.
36:54This is what I chose. This is a full apple that I thinly cut my garden.
36:59My girlfriend enjoys it like that and so do I.
37:01Big chunks, I'm not really a fan of. Some people like bigger chunks.
37:04Some people like smaller chunks. I happen to like bigger.
37:06This is an almond and coconut kind bar which
37:09is a very, very, very healthy substitute for
37:14you know, those wannabe healthy bars. So, I definitely recommend those. This is my favorite
37:19flavor of the kind bar and it's 190 calories and I have a serving of natural
37:24almonds with some sea salt on them.
37:29I just got out of the shower. I already showed you what I had for breakfast. Yes, I tend to have salad
37:34for breakfast. I don't see anything wrong with that. And to speak upon the big elephant in the room.
37:39What is this? Today is my January 7th weigh in. I left you guys off with the
37:44question of, I wrote this down so I wouldn't forget, that I followed through yesterday.
37:49First, I want to talk about something. I want to talk about stir fry.
37:54Whether it's healthy, unhealthy, gross, good. It is like this trick.
37:59I have a trigger inside of me that I don't even understand. I have a lot of triggers which
38:04I will possibly talk about in another video but this trigger, I don't know.
38:09Like I don't understand it. Whether I'm dieting or whether I'm like not dieting, I will eat
38:14so much stir fry. I will turn the healthy stir fry.
38:19Into unhealthy stir fry because that's how much I ate it. Like, so I don't know what it is.
38:24When my girlfriend's mom made stir fry yesterday. When I found out she was making stir fry, I
38:29almost died. Not really. But I was like, alright, well, I guess today
38:34is down in the dumps. That's pretty much what my mind frame was. It is just chicken.
38:38A bu-
38:39a bunch of vegetables with low sodium soy sauce and brown rice on the side.
38:441
38:451
38:462
38:472
38:482
38:493
38:505
38:512
38:522
38:535
38:556
38:566
38:572
38:587
38:598
39:028
39:038
39:041
39:057
39:0712
39:088
39:098
39:1011
39:117
39:129
39:1312
38:49But, I mean, I could eat so much of that,
38:52turn it into a good...
38:54800 calories plus.
38:56So, I was worried.
38:57I was scared.
38:58I was like, here we go.
38:59I'm gonna be messing up again.
39:00Here's one of my biggest triggers, this and that.
39:03But...
39:04While I was eating, you know, I got my...
39:05I think I got less than a serving because a serving was a lot.
39:09So, I was thinking to myself, why get a whole bunch if I could be satisfied?
39:14With less than a serving.
39:15So, I decided to get less than a serving.
39:17After I ate it, you know, I was...
39:19I was satisfied, but I was going in for another spoonful, which would have still been with
39:24within my serving range.
39:25I asked my girlfriend, I was like, do you want more?
39:27And when she said no, something...
39:29Inside of me said no as well.
39:31And I want to thank my girlfriend.
39:32So, thank you very much.
39:33You...
39:34You helped me, even though it wouldn't have been bad if we had more.
39:36I am so proud.
39:39I am so proud of us.
39:39I am proud of me because normally in that type of case, I would have been like...
39:44Stir fry, you know.
39:46My girlfriend isn't a copycat.
39:48That's like a...
39:49Really horrible way to say it, but she tends to follow in my direction more.
39:53If I...
39:54If I was to mess up on my diet, she would too.
39:56That's why all the weight she's gained, I do feel...
39:59Like I am 95% the issue because I was messing up on my diet.
40:04So, she was too.
40:05Even though I was making the movement to get more stir fry...
40:09She said no, I don't want any, which in the long run helped us...
40:14Both.
40:14And I'm just really proud of us both.
40:16And I'm so freaking happy, you guys.
40:18So, this brings...
40:19Me to the question of, did I follow through yesterday, you guys?
40:22I think you already know that answer.
40:24Yes, I did.
40:25I fell through.
40:27I used my staying the same.
40:29As a way of, oh my god, tomorrow I want to be down something.
40:33I want to...
40:34Prove my body wrong in a way and be like, I can lose weight and you're not going to stop me.
40:38So, yesterday...
40:39Today I weighed in at 370.2 and today I weighed in at 369.4 which is...
40:44Is a weight loss of 0.8.
40:46I'm happy with it.
40:47I must say I really am back...
40:49Back in the day, 0.8 would have been upsetting to me.
40:51We have fluctuations and I understand them completely.
40:54So, that means my total loss is 50.6 and that means...
40:59I have 69.6 pounds to go.
41:02I have to lose about 1.5 every...
41:04Every single week to reach my goal in 2014 and I'm ahead of the ball game.
41:09It has only been a week since I've been on this new journey of mine and...
41:14I'm doing great and I'm very proud of myself and I'm never proud of myself.
41:18I'm just not.
41:19I am.
41:19I really am.
41:20I have not gone over my calories in 1, 2, 3...
41:244, 5, 6, 6 days and I have not done that in...
41:29So long, you guys.
41:30I feel like the reason why I'm doing this now is...
41:34Because I have my girlfriend who's on board and I cannot wait to make that...
41:39Video to tell you guys I'm in the 200s.
41:44What are you doing?
41:46Oh.
41:47Okay.
41:48I guess you won't...
41:49What's up here?
41:53Are you a pretty kitty?
41:54Yeah.
41:55So I told my girlfriend to draw her dream wedding.
41:59Andres and this is what she drew and she said that's supposed to be lace.
42:03This is...
42:04So...
42:04So...
42:05So...
42:09I don't even know what to say.
42:10I can't draw.
42:11So...
42:12So for those...
42:14Those of you who come to our wedding, wink wink, this is what she'll look like.
42:19What are you doing?
42:22Oh, okay.
42:23Fine.
42:24Ringo, what are you doing?
42:25Ringo, why is your face in the sink?
42:27What are you trying to find in there?
42:28Okay.
42:29I guess you can ignore me too.
42:34What are you trying to find in there?
42:39I guess I show them my plushies instead of...
42:41Show them your plushies?
42:44Okay, now what?
42:47I said I'm not...
42:49Yeah, last night my girlfriend decided to...
42:52Well, I decided to clean the room.
42:54And she put her plushies over there because I figured it would be better.
42:58I have to go...
42:59Film a tag, I think.
43:00I should probably go do that.
43:01It's pretty late at night.
43:02Oh, God.
43:03I should have worn makeup.
43:04If I am talking too low, it's because my girlfriend's parents are...
43:09Sleeping in the other room and I don't want to be too loud.
43:12So, here we go.
43:13The first question...
43:14The first question is, when did you start to gain weight?
43:16Whenever I watch these tags, I hear people say...
43:19How there was like a certain time when they started gaining weight, but not for me.
43:23I was...
43:24A chubby baby and I started becoming obese when I was like...
43:29The lowest weight I can remember being is 290 and that was the age of...
43:3411.
43:34So, that's just bad.
43:37What was your heaviest weight?
43:39My heaviest known weight is 420 pounds.
43:43I'm more than...
43:44I'm positive it was higher than that at one point, but that is the weight I always say...
43:49As my heaviest weight is 420 pounds.
43:52What diets have you been on?
43:54I have done weight watchers several times.
43:57It works.
43:57It honestly does.
43:59I get bored with it and I end up stopping or quitting.
44:02I've counted calories.
44:03I've done 12...
44:04I've done 1200.
44:05I've done 2200.
44:06I'm currently doing 1800 and it's working...
44:09Magnificently.
44:09I have really never done any fad dieting.
44:12That's not really...
44:14My thing.
44:14Next question is, is your goal a number size or a goal on the scale?
44:19I want to say my overall goal is 230 pounds.
44:24What is your favorite food?
44:25My favorite food is salmon.
44:27Cooked salmon, not raw.
44:29Tiny...
44:31Like that.
44:33But food we've not...
44:34I will not give up...
44:35I will not give up anything.
44:37I believe in moderate...
44:39That's what makes me feel like I'm closed in a cage.
44:43I still...
44:44I still have sweets every single day and I am still losing weight every single day.
44:49Yesterday I weighed in at 370.2 and today I weighed in at 370.
44:54I stayed the same, 377.0, 369...
44:59I can't imagine ever depriving myself because it's sick.
45:04It just does not work for me.
45:05I don't give up anything.
45:07How do you reward your accomplishments?
45:09I do not reward myself because I have nothing to give myself, really.
45:14I'm normally not really proud of myself, but lately I have been.
45:17That could be in a reward.
45:19Me being proud of myself because I really never am.
45:22I hope that people around...
45:24...are proud and even my mini goal of 299 pounds.
45:28I hope people...
45:29...will ravish in my accomplishments.
45:31I normally don't like to be, like, a center of attention.
45:34But I want everybody to be proud of me when that happens because, honestly, I can't imagine being...
45:39...in the 200s, so once I am, I just want, like, a celebration with words and congratulations.
45:44Honestly, I don't know if that sounds selfish, but I just, I, I, I...
45:49I'm sure you guys understand what I'm talking about.
45:51What are your non-scale goals?
45:54I feel like more than anything, I just want to be able to walk up and down the stairs.
45:59I'm mainly up the stairs without feeling completely like I'm about to die.
46:03No, I don't...
46:04I don't feel that bad, but I get out of breath way too easily, and I just don't want that.
46:08I know...
46:09Once I lose even 30 more pounds, that, you know, that won't happen as often because it's really embarrassing.
46:14More than anything, and it just shows how unhealthy I am, and I really don't like it.
46:19So that is one of my main goals, I guess you can call it, is to not just be...
46:24So out of breath, it's just, it's just bad, it's just not cute.
46:29What makes losing weight hard for you?
46:31I'm a food addict, I'm not afraid to admit that.
46:34I come from a family of addicts, but different type of addicts, my parents...
46:39Both do drugs, and I was put into foster care at a very young age.
46:43I turned to...
46:44I became addicted to it, it became my best friend, it became my go-to, it became...
46:49My medicine, it made me feel good when I wasn't feeling good.
46:54If you're like that for 22 years, how do you stop...
46:59Doing what you know so well, I am trying my hardest not to turn to...
47:04Food when I'm feeling sad, because that is what made me...
47:09More morbidly obese, I'm just gonna get more and more unhealthy if...
47:14I continue being the way I was for those 22 years, and it's that simple.
47:18The last question...
47:19The last question is, would you ever consider weight loss surgery?
47:22Whenever I'd visit my mom, I have not lived...
47:24With her in a very long time, and whenever we'd see each other and we'd talk about my weight...
47:28She'd always...
47:29Growing up gastric bypass surgery, she really truly believed that that was what I should...
47:34Do and the best, you know, for me.
47:36It's not that she didn't believe in me, it's just that...
47:39That's just always where her mind went.
47:41About, you know, a year and a half ago...
47:44I found out that I had gallstones, and that the surgery to get my gallbladder removed...
47:49Would be...
47:50How would I put it?
47:51The surgeon told me that I am at risk because...
47:54Of how big I am, he suggested that I get gastric bypass surgery...
47:59You know, for a minute there, I was like, you know, that might be my only option...
48:02But, to be honest with you...
48:04I don't think I'd ever get it...
48:06If you have it, I am...
48:07I am, like, proud...
48:09That you're not so fearful of it...
48:11Because that is...
48:12I'm fearful of...
48:14And on top of that, I am fearful of what might happen if I ever...
48:19Get a weight loss surgery...
48:20I feel like if I was to do this, I want to do it myself...
48:24Because I feel like, in a way, it's easier...
48:27Those people who get surgery, I am...
48:29I am so amazed at the power that they have to do that because...
48:34I feel like getting surgery might be the harder route...
48:37And I am, like, amazed at...
48:39People who do that...
48:40I know a lot of people who do that...
48:42And it's to each their own...
48:43No matter how you...
48:44You lose weight, though...
48:45It's hard.
48:46It is.
48:47It really is.
48:48With surgery, I feel like the only...
48:49The only surgery that I'll be like, hell yes for...
48:51Is to remove my extra skin...
48:54Once I have it...
48:55I don't have insurance...
48:56I don't have income...
48:57So I have no money...
48:58But I'm...
48:59I'm hoping one day...
49:00If I have...
49:01You know...
49:02I know I'm gonna have a lot of extra skin...
49:03So I'm hoping...
49:04Hoping one day...
49:05Down the line...
49:06I can...
49:07You know...
49:08Have a job and save money...
49:09And be able to...
49:09Do that surgery...
49:10Weight loss surgery...
49:11No, I never get it...
49:12I do want to do this myself...
49:13I hope you guys...
49:14Enjoyed...
49:15I'm...
49:16Sorry it ran a little longer than I thought it would be...
49:18I feel like I'm stuck...
49:19In a rockin' hard place...
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