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Cody Ko's old vlogs
  • 3 days ago

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😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00Two words, add, sense, money, bitch.
00:03That's what it's about, baby.
00:04Do we have money in the couple?
00:06Oh, do we?
00:07Oh, do we?
00:08What is this?
00:08I don't give a fuck about that.
00:09Actually, could you get that?
00:10I think I dropped it down there.
00:15Our toilet broke, and Marcus left a note.
00:19But this is the most Marcus note of all time.
00:23Try not to use.
00:25Any other person would write, do not use.
00:27Marcus writes, could you just go ahead and try your best not to use?
00:30This thing so much.
00:31Sweet GTR, man.
00:33The car is so fucking dumb.
00:34Who would drive that?
00:36YouTube stars.
00:37Every single YouTube star has that car.
00:39Not me.
00:40This dude's got, like, an insane necktie.
00:43Yeah, I can't look at him because I want to laugh.
00:46I can't look at it because I feel like I'm going to get stabbed.
00:49Yeah, let's just describe him.
00:50All right, first of all, he looks like he's lost hair from the stress of killing so many people.
00:55All right, if that gives you an image.
00:57His beard looks earned, not grown, earned, right?
01:02And he's done some shit.
01:03He's killed a bear.
01:05He's done a lot of shit.
01:07I wonder what this dude's career is.
01:09He owns like a chain of karate stores.
01:12Yeah.
01:12Or karate dojos.
01:14Or if it's something really, like, lame, like, just, like, handmade beads on, like, an Etsy store.
01:22And he just, like, cashes out on Coachella every year.
01:25I think I'll find a name for a bead company.
01:26I got what you bead.
01:34Yep, I'm going to let you have the end.
01:36Let you have that one.
01:38We got Spike a little brother.
01:40Oh, there it is.
01:42It keeps focusing on Devin's bad body.
01:44I want it to focus on this.
01:45Come do that.
01:46Can't do that.
01:48No, it's still bad.
01:49It's like, no, it's not as bad.
01:50There we go.
01:52There we go.
01:52Now we're in business, baby.
01:54Spike's little baby.
01:55Aborted before I ever had a chance to grow up.
01:58You said Spike's aborted baby?
02:00What should we name it?
02:03Spike 2.
02:04This time.
02:05This time it's...
02:06This time it's serious.
02:08This time it's serious.
02:11That's Marcus writing a movie title.
02:13This time I mean business.
02:16Spike 2.
02:17This time I'm sending a sternly worded email.
02:19And you're on the air.
02:22Fuck.
02:23Just anything.
02:24How are you feeling tonight?
02:24We should do...
02:25Feeling great.
02:26Feeling great?
02:26All right, that's really good.
02:27Wait.
02:28Marcus is just as bad of a host as she is a guest.
02:31I'm terrible.
02:32All right, good.
02:33Feeling great.
02:34Good.
02:35This is a dog microphone.
02:37So you've got to switch it to girl mode.
02:39Who in this room would you hook up with if you had the chance?
02:43Who?
02:43If you had to kill somebody in this room, who would you kill?
02:45Who?
02:46Oh!
02:47Wait, would you kill him and then hook up with him?
02:48Mm-hmm.
02:49Fuck, marry, kill.
02:50Cody right now, Cody one year ago, Cody two years ago.
02:54Damn it.
02:54All right, I'm going to kill Cody now.
02:55Okay.
02:56That's like a serious question.
02:56I'll marry Cody like three years ago, like when he wasn't like well-known.
02:59Nice.
02:59And then I'll probably fuck him like the two year ago, Cody.
03:02Right.
03:02Okay, okay.
03:03Fair enough.
03:04Old you just got fucking laid, dude.
03:06Shout out two years ago, me.
03:08This chick is straight up just brushing her teeth.
03:12Slowly but surely, too.
03:13Yeah, she's getting...
03:14Get that tartar.
03:15Girl, you get it.
03:17Yeah.
03:18Oh, oh.
03:18Don't make it for more.
03:20Nothing ties together the morning commute, like just brushing the pearly way.
03:25Oh, if only there was more hours in the day, huh?
03:27I wish I had time to brush my teeth for two seconds before I leave the fucking house.
03:31Oh, she's looking over here.
03:31Fuck.
03:32Oh, fuck.
03:32I'm kidding.
03:34What do I do?
03:36Freestyle right now.
03:37Spit it.
03:37My dad hates me.
03:43That's it?
03:43That's your whole freestyle?
03:44Oh, wow.
03:45Okay.
03:45Oh, boy.
03:47Man, there's a circle of dude rapping.
03:49Everyone's like,
03:50Go on the motherfucking.
03:51Hard as hell.
03:52The kid comes out like,
03:53Yo, my dad hates me.
03:54He said,
03:55If I come home right now,
03:56He gonna beat my ass.
03:57So, I gotta hang out
03:58And just stay on the street and shit.
04:00Everyone's like,
04:01Oh!
04:03Yo, that was hot.
04:04I can't go home for real.
04:07Oh, yeah.
04:07It's fitting.
04:08Keep going.
04:10That's my ass.
04:11That boss, he was like,
04:12Yo, I can't go home right now.
04:13My parents don't love music.
04:15Yo, that was dope.
04:17You should expand on that.
04:20So, what's up, man?
04:20What do you live?
04:21You live with your mom?
04:22I just said.
04:24I can't go home.
04:24We can't back at it.
04:25We can't.
04:26We just can't stop spitting.
04:28Uh-oh, bitch.
04:29Looks like we got a shipment of shoes in the mail.
04:32Looks like I will be getting bullied.
04:34No longer.
04:35It's really hard to do an unboxing
04:36with one hand.
04:38First pair of shoes.
04:40Let's see what we got.
04:41Okay.
04:42Oh, damn.
04:44These are hot.
04:45These are like the George Washington twos.
04:49Pair number two.
04:50Oh, shit.
04:51Okay.
04:53We got the gray desert boots.
04:54Yeah, I'm feeling these, too.
04:56Very versatile shoe right here.
04:58You can wear these with pants.
05:00And that's pretty much it.
05:02Let's see what we got.
05:04Third.
05:04I just want to hit the country club.
05:06Am I right?
05:06Fucking play some tennis with my friend Price with these.
05:10What do we got here?
05:11Okay.
05:12These are kind of like...
05:13Like I ride a fixie and own a typewriter.
05:17I might wear these today.
05:19See what Noelle has to say about these fucking things.
05:21All right.
05:21That's it for today's video.
05:22Shout out to Jessica.
05:23See you on Monday.
05:24Peace.
05:25Four days later.
05:29Fuck you, Cody.
05:30I put it in.
05:30I put it in.
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