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00:00Oh
00:01Though your heart is aching
00:06Smile
00:07Morning is love desperate to find you
00:10Morning is love without a home
00:14Morning is love
00:15Showing you our unbreakable bond
00:19Morning is love
00:22Clinging to the hope one day we will see each other again
00:27I'm glad to be your love
00:29It's on us
00:31I've decided on an open casket
00:33So that we could all celebrate his life together one last time
00:37Just smile
00:38Why?
00:39Give up!
00:40You would take it to shoot, lad
00:43Rest easy, little fella
00:49When I needed a hand
00:51I found your port
00:59I don't know
01:01Can I go to the world?
01:03I can't go home
01:08If you wanna run away with me
01:09I know a galaxy and I can take you on a ride
01:12In a glitter in the sky
01:13Glitter in my eyes
01:14And it's the way you lie
01:16If you're feeling like you need a little bit
01:17Oh, my God, is she pregnant?
01:19Wait, Ian, is it the posh lads?
01:22I didn't know we had a dinner.
01:24It is, dirty bastard. No way.
01:31Fuck off.
01:32Well done for not being preggers out, you two.
01:34We've been together like four weeks, that's a record for round here, that.
01:37Amy, stop embarrassing yourself, this is painful to watch.
01:40What are you on about, you gimp?
01:42You're getting with this posh mupper just to get close to me.
01:45Look, I know it's a difficult time with the anniversary of our kiss approaching,
01:49but you're obsessed with this kiss, Rhys.
01:51I'm the best kiss you've ever had, aren't I?
01:53Oh, it's OK to admit it.
01:55Nah, she had a bad kiss.
01:56The fact that you could open me kiss, though.
01:58I was thinking I'm old salad, though.
01:59He's not even signed a new contract, though.
02:01I must say that.
02:03Got a kid at 16 now, boys, with a slight error of uncertainty if it's mine or not.
02:07Told you I'm turning into a fully-fledged Scouser.
02:09Lad, you will never be a Scouser. You don't want a pair of willies.
02:13Hey, boy!
02:15My nan got me them for Christmas.
02:16Your what?
02:17Your nan.
02:18Lads, tomorrow night, don't forget, me dad's picking us up at 6.40 and in karaoke.
02:22I hate you, Mum.
02:23You know, 16 years of being absent could all be forgotten if he nails a rendition of Hey Jude's.
02:28Shut up.
02:29You sign?
02:30Sorry, I just find it insensitive you talking about your alive dad when you know mine's dead.
02:34Oh, it's selfish.
02:35It's night, mate.
02:36You know, I feel like you've been very insensitive lately.
02:39You know, you're even thinking about your poor Mary who's probably going through a whirlwind of emotions right now.
02:43She is.
02:44Cos I am.
02:45What?
02:46I reckon this year is the year I've finally buried me face in her arse.
02:50No, listen, if I had the choice of eating chicken dippers out of her arse, and while I'm in there, I'd get hit by a bus like Divock did.
02:56No.
02:57I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
02:58I take it.
02:59What a last meal.
03:00What a way to go.
03:01What a way to go.
03:02Can you see that?
03:03What?
03:04You're a little mean, you know.
03:05What do you mean?
03:06So, boys, how's the buddy up scheme going?
03:11I'm a changed man, sir.
03:12A stroke of genius from you to pair me with this inspirational guiding light.
03:17Can I ask though, sir, you didn't put us together because we're both gator, Jack.
03:21Are you?
03:22I just thought you both had views that were perhaps more on the liberal side.
03:27So, when you've heard that Nigerian lads, it looks about 40, but the Senegalis lads, it looks about 50.
03:32That was random, was it?
03:33Oh, completely random.
03:35They are thriving.
03:36Can't argue with results.
03:41What about these, Tim?
03:42I think you'll find her hair colour is orchid purple, and hers is heliotrope purple.
03:47And they're both hardcore vegans.
03:49Well, it's not for me to cast aspersions on the dietary requirements of other people.
03:54Why are them two together?
03:56Actually, they're both short.
03:59Hard to tell when you're sitting.
04:00Sir, I don't care if you put us together because we're both gay.
04:04I've learned so much from them already.
04:06I'm lucky that in a world where gay men still face the threat of persecution, I have a mentor like Ted Price, who makes me feel safe, secure and free to be who I am.
04:20That's lovely, lads.
04:23And just to clarify 100%, I had no idea you were both gay.
04:28Oh.
04:29Close the door and away ask.
04:31I despise your face with a passion, lad.
04:33Don't talk to me for the next five weeks until this bloody scheme is over.
04:36Are you sure you'll make five more weeks, granddaughter?
04:38I'm a year older than you, so watch your mouth, Mr. Wampu.
04:41Why?
04:42What are you going to do?
04:43Bore me to death with tales of our life was bad for us in the 50s because we got thrown in jail for bumming.
04:48You know, it's hard to take you seriously considering your voice as an even baruch, yeah?
04:57Your night Jodie is decent.
04:59He's just nipped down the shot for me.
05:00Oh.
05:01Okay.
05:02Do you not want to come inside and wait for him?
05:04Er, yeah.
05:05Yeah, all right.
05:12Is that a new car?
05:13Er, yeah, it is.
05:16Suit you?
05:18Thanks.
05:19Do you want something to him doing me something?
05:20Yeah, go ahead, chance.
05:22I was thinking, er, wedges and...
05:30Chicken dippers?
05:31Yep.
05:32Yep.
05:33How do you like your dippers, Con?
05:35I don't mind.
05:36Do you want them in the oven, on the grill?
05:38Whatever.
05:39If they're not on my arse, then.
05:41What?
05:42No.
05:43He tells me everything you play.
05:46Oh, look, it's all right. Don't worry about it. I know what lads are like.
05:51You're just panting anyway, innit?
05:52Come to think of it, I've had a bit of a rough day, Sam.
05:56I'll be up for a bit of fun.
05:57If you are.
05:58What do you mean you can't play it starting in a minute?
05:59Don't worry, I put a shout out on Discord to get you a new partner.
06:00Oh, is there some of me now? Is there Hellfire?
06:01He's better than you, to be honest.
06:02No, some random calls.
06:03Your nan's butt plug.
06:04Oh, he's joining in the chat now.
06:05Okay, bye.
06:06Is this your nan's butt plug?
06:07Hello?
06:08I can be your hero, baby.
06:09What an absolute bell-end, baby.
06:10I can be your hero.
06:11What an absolute bell-end, baby.
06:14Can you see?
06:15I can be your hero, baby.
06:16Can you see?
06:17What do you mean you can't play it starting in a minute?
06:19Don't worry, I put a shout out on Discord to get you a new partner.
06:22Oh, is this your nan's butt plug?
06:23Is this your nan's butt plug?
06:24Hello?
06:25I can be your hero, baby.
06:26What an absolute bell-end, baby.
06:31I can be your hero, baby.
06:36baby growl round one oh what what if I told you about leaving your webs on top
06:47of mine it marks them
06:50I'll just try it please what the fuck
07:07no it can't be no
07:18are you sure you'll be able to get it back out
07:25mom
07:27come
07:30that's what you get for grass and a mom
07:36that was a warning next time I'm in there for real
07:40winner
07:42get in
07:44hey I'm sorry I'd go with you about your name
07:47a bit of a sore subject you see because me and I actually showed me a butt plug collection once when I went out
07:52traumatizing
07:54especially as each one came with a practical demonstration
07:57hang on
07:58do we have to sing now
08:00are we related
08:04oh
08:06I thought the interview would be in person but soon's fine
08:09I'm really looking forward to it
08:11see you then
08:12no way what you looking forward to gail
08:14you got a fella on the go
08:16uh yeah
08:17yeah
08:18yeah I've got a little date to be on the aisle tinder and that
08:23mustard boy
08:24stop adding boy to the end of everything because you think it makes it an insult
08:28you can do it to anything and it sounds insulting
08:30building an orphanage to save the children boy
08:32see
08:33alright lad
08:34I was on the mess
08:39kick theory about boy boy
08:41ha ha ha
08:43some top to ya scranflang today
08:45scranny mcfee
08:46scranj pustacoglu
08:48scrapper a lid
08:50ha ha ha
08:51ha ha
08:53batten bear boy
08:54ha ha ha
08:56it's all about breadcrumming now gail
08:58keeping lads interested by feeding them little breadcrumbs now and again
09:01like I like on insta a random lazy text a blowjob
09:05last one was a joke
09:07he stuffy doffy
09:09he loves a bat and b
09:12he gets it down in three
09:15he stuffy doffy
09:18put more in the bin than you'd add in your mouth again
09:21lad
09:22if there's anything you want to talk about you can
09:25suppose there is one thing
09:28how do I get this knob with a hero complex off me back just cause I didn't finish me lunch
09:33you need to learn all the lingo too
09:35like GGG
09:36good given a game
09:37which means he's sex positive
09:39which means he wants to respectfully and wokefully shag your senseless
09:42yep
09:43that was really educational thanks for that girls
09:46you're welcome
09:47help me almighty gay one
09:54I lost my mummy and my daddy
09:57I'm a tragic little orphan that needs saving
10:00first case of a justified orphan
10:02ah
10:04ah here we go
10:05what is this dark scary place
10:07why
10:08am I in her
10:09what are you dibbin?
10:10foster hoe
10:11oh no
10:12please save me teddy price
10:14I'll save you
10:15and then I'll ring your neck you little maggie
10:17now then trouble
10:18what are you talking about?
10:20oh no
10:21just having a little chat with the girls about the crusty tissues I found under your bed yesterday
10:25mum
10:26you best be joking
10:27of course I'm joking
10:28but if you don't put them in the bin like I told you I'm gonna tell the whole school
10:31where are you going?
10:32where are you going?
10:33er one mere
10:34just off to have me meeting with the Tate Liverpool
10:36we're gonna put together an exhibition of your crusty tissues
10:39put your face next to it
10:40intimate moments by Rhys Duffy
10:42hey mum
10:43what?
10:44yeah there is one I made earlier
10:48disgusting
10:49I have a very important announcement
10:51for anyone out there who's suffering
10:53for anyone out there who needs hope in their darkest hour
10:57there's a very special man that will save you
10:59is it Jesus?
11:00Ted Price
11:01the hero we didn't know we needed
11:04because we literally don't need him
11:07the man that's gonna make all our lives joyful
11:10so please let's hear it for the one and only
11:15our saviour
11:17Ted Price
11:18when I say Ted you say Price
11:20Ted
11:21Price
11:22Ted
11:23Price
11:24Price
11:25Price
11:26Price
11:27Price
11:28Price
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11:58Price
11:59Price
12:00Price
12:01Price
12:02Price
12:03Price
12:04Price
12:05Price
12:06I was so good out there today lads, because I don't feel the weight in the bib, I have to play without fear
12:11Because there goes the fear, let it go
12:15You turn around and life's passed you by
12:19Don't waste chances being afraid, yeah?
12:23As I'm telling you boys, everything you've ever wanted
12:26Is on the other side of fear
12:29I'm scared of karaoke, but you know what?
12:34I'm going to do it
12:35Come on, come on
12:37Come on
12:39Come on
12:45There's been a mistake, this isn't a song I picked
12:48Got this
12:49Come on
12:50Come on
12:51Come on lads
12:52Don't ask me
12:54Oh god
12:55Go on
12:56He's crumbled
12:57Give me that mic, lad
12:58I have to tell you
13:02I love your precious heart
13:06I
13:08I
13:10I was standing
13:12You were there
13:14Come on lads
13:15That's beautiful
13:16Two worlds collided
13:18Two worlds collided
13:20And they could never tear us apart
13:24Come on
13:26Come on
13:27Come on
13:28Come on
13:29Come on
13:30Come on
13:31Take it away son.
13:35We could live.
13:38Go ahead lads.
13:40For a thousand years.
13:43If I hurt you, I'd make wine from your tears.
13:50Come on!
13:51I told you that we could fly.
13:56Hello?
13:57How's my favourite underpaid glass collector?
13:59Dave, if you're going to ask her back to work tonight, I can't.
14:01I'm back in school.
14:02I'm not asking you to work, but I do have a special request.
14:05You said that'd be a one-time thing and that I'd never have to do it again.
14:08Oh, please, I wouldn't be asking you to do that again.
14:10Have I better head for my blow-up doll?
14:12Our usual compay's got another gig, so we need someone for the drag night Thursday.
14:15What do you reckon?
14:16You want me to do it?
14:18No, knobhead. Do you know anyone?
14:20I'm messing. Of course I'm asking you.
14:22Listen, I think you've got something.
14:24When you speak, people listen.
14:25You grab their attention.
14:26It's time to stop living in the shadows and step into the lights of my stage.
14:30Now, don't you dare be funnier than me.
14:32Vivi, are you sure?
14:33Of course I'm sure.
14:35Oh, come on, lad.
14:36What's the worst that can happen?
14:37You bomb so hard, you become a shell of a man so traumatised you never leave the house.
14:41Because I tell you what, if you do bomb, I'm never speaking to you again.
14:45Could never, ever tear us apart.
14:51Come on, lad.
14:52Woo!
14:55What do you say with a bit now, son?
14:57What is it?
14:58Saxophone.
15:03It's not that bad.
15:04This is all because of who you know.
15:06Makes fun.
15:07I'm gonna make up for some lost time.
15:09Shame.
15:10He's just told me he's doing one of his own songs next called I Hate My Son.
15:13That's it.
15:15Everybody, come on!
15:16I
15:17I
15:19I
15:20I
15:21I
15:22I
15:23I
15:24I
15:25I
15:26I
15:27I
15:29I
15:31I
15:32I
15:33I
15:34I
15:35I
15:36I
15:37I
15:38I
15:39I
15:40I
15:41I
15:42I
15:43I
15:45I
15:47I
15:49I
15:50I
15:51I
15:52I
15:53I
15:54I
15:55I
15:56I
15:57I
16:09I
16:10I've got a law degree. I got it in 2007.
16:14I got pregnant afterwards, so I haven't really had a chance to do anything with it.
16:18We were all young and foolish once, my love.
16:22Just give us the siggies, will you? I gave you 20 quid.
16:25Lad, forget the siggies.
16:28You should be putting food in your mouth, you scrawny little rat.
16:31This morning, honestly, I heard the shit that was bigger than you.
16:35You know in Africa, innit?
16:37They have a vert on the telly, asking her to send food to you.
16:43Pass the siggies before you're supposed to get booted, to Africa.
16:49Rat. Lads, come on.
16:52You groom-bumming this little lad then, Ted, lad, yeah?
16:54Kieran, you can't even spell the word groom. Be gone.
16:57Come on.
16:59I told you to leave it to me, lad.
17:01How do you spell groom? What are you doing?
17:04I didn't say I was getting them for you, did I?
17:06I know that I'm your homie.
17:11I ain't just gonna let that go.
17:14I agree.
17:16With your underprivileged background and your experience
17:18of the many issues our clients suffer from,
17:21I really think our clients are gonna connect with you.
17:24Yeah. I mean, I've had them all.
17:27Substance abuse issues, homelessness, unemployment, domestic violence
17:32and the big crowd pleaser. Mental health crises.
17:35You know, I feel for women in your situation.
17:38It isn't easy balancing career with issues.
17:41Then you stupidly get pregnant, which only compounds your problems.
17:47And you end up deeply regretting having the child,
17:49as you've basically screwed up your whole career.
17:52Will you wind your neck in your patronising gobshite?
17:55I don't regret anything about my life.
17:57In fact, I really like it.
17:59And having that boy was the best thing that could have ever happened to me.
18:01Oh, and while I'm at it,
18:02I live amongst these people with their so-called issues.
18:05And let me tell you something for nothing.
18:07With all their problems,
18:08not a one of them is as big of a delusional dickhead as you are.
18:11Hey, Mum. What are you doing?
18:14Oh, look, son, we've got big money problems.
18:17Someone's got to do some cam work and it's not going to be you, is he?
18:20I see if I'd make more than you. I see.
18:22Mid-japon. It's a big market.
18:26Fuck!
18:30Who uses WhatsApp anyway, grandad?
18:32I'm only using WhatsApp cos Bebo's down.
18:35Oh, my God, you picture you on your moped.
18:38Is that cos you hope girls will look at it and think,
18:40Oh, my God, will you take me for a ride?
18:45Have you finished?
18:46So, three wins together.
18:48Have a past the trial.
18:49Trial to be the most annoying bellend
18:51who happens to be great at payday.
18:54Yeah.
18:55With flying colours.
18:57Get it.
18:58Get it.
19:02Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do.
19:11Good little shit.
19:11Let's get some food.
19:41How are we, kid?
19:53You do realise we don't have to hang around toilets for sex anymore?
19:57We're accepted now.
19:58Not having lunch today?
20:00I'm allergic to fish. I had a Mackey's before.
20:02What did you have?
20:03The big tasty burger.
20:04That seasonal meat. You don't have it now?
20:06It's back, lad.
20:07I'll be, I know what you're doing.
20:09Making apologies. Saying you feel sick. Smoking so you don't feel hungry.
20:13Smoking was cool in the 50s. I don't blame you.
20:16Lad, I've been where you are.
20:18In this cubicle? Is this where you're rid from the Natties in 1943?
20:22Well, they wouldn't execute you for being gay. They'd execute you for being so annoying.
20:30I know about that prison in your head.
20:32I know how that prison's full of anxiety.
20:35Anxiety when you catch a look at yourself in the mirror.
20:39Anxiety when you'd allow yourself that one bite.
20:42The constant thought and obsessions about food, calories, weight, BMI.
20:47You should exercise more. You shouldn't have had that bite.
20:50The thought is so exhausting that you think you just want peace.
20:54You think that not waking up in the morning wouldn't be so bad.
20:57I'm coming out. For sake!
21:03I want the world to know.
21:05Did you listen to anything I've just said?
21:07Why did you stop boxing?
21:09How do you know about that?
21:10Me cousin goes the same club as you.
21:12He says you're good, but a few months ago you stopped going. Why?
21:16I didn't fancy it anymore.
21:18Sure, mate, yeah.
21:19Here's what I think.
21:20You go around acting like you're the perfect gay who's got it all figured out.
21:25Yet you don't think you're worthy enough to box with straight lads.
21:29Seems like the almighty gay one's a big hypocrite.
21:32Shut up, you little prick. I'm here trying to help you.
21:35If I ever want to learn about how to be a weak coward who's one big fraud,
21:39I'll come to you.
21:40But until then, fuck off and leave me alone.
21:52Hi Jodie.
21:53Robbie.
21:54Robert here from Central Liverpool Housing Association.
21:57We'd like to offer you the job.
21:59You're messing.
22:01I called you a delusional dickhead.
22:03Upon reflection, I realised you had an empathy and open-minded attitude towards our clients,
22:09which I think will be a huge asset to our office.
22:14I'll take it.
22:16Great.
22:17Although, can we not mention it to the job centre?
22:19I still want to keep me benefits, like.
22:21I'm afraid that's illegal and I'm good.
22:24You're joking, aren't you?
22:26Very good.
22:28Congratulations.
22:30Looking forward to working with you.
22:32Nice one, Robbie.
22:34You fucking dancer!
22:39Who are you on the phone to?
22:40Oh!
22:41It's it!
22:42Littlepeopleporncams.com
22:44Yeah.
22:47Five foot one maximum?
22:49No problem.
22:51Bigger than two inches?
22:54Definitely not.
22:56Welcome to Boss Little Queers Days, you know.
22:59Don't worry, lads.
23:00If I can transform this face, there's hope for yous too.
23:03We've got a new comp here for you this evening.
23:06It's his first night, so please be nice.
23:09And yes, I'm looking at you, lads.
23:11No bouncing bottles off his head.
23:13Oh, what's she doing, the old prick?
23:16Give it up for the gorgeous Ted Price!
23:19Good evening.
23:20Who's ready for a night of eleganza extravaganza?
23:23I love drag queens, mate.
23:24Why do drag queens always have money?
23:25Why?
23:26Because she knows how to took her away.
23:27This pubeless one that's dying on his arse.
23:28Shut up, Teric.
23:29If I wanted to wear the arse, I'll speak as farmies.
23:30Hot fucking pick-up!
23:31My curly hair's homophobic friends in the audience tonight.
23:33Stand up, hon.
23:34Come on, give him a little clap.
23:35Now this boy asks me,
23:37how do you do that?
23:38I love drag queens, mate.
23:39Why do drag queens always have money?
23:40Why?
23:41Because she knows how to took her away.
23:42This pubeless one that's dying on his arse.
23:44Shut up, Teric.
23:45If I wanted to wear the arse, I'll speak as farmies.
23:47Hot fucking pick-up!
23:50My curly hair's homophobic friends in the audience tonight.
23:54Stand up, hon.
23:55Come on, give him a little clap.
23:57Now this boy asks me hundreds of thousands of questions a day.
24:02Each one more homophobic than the last.
24:04What was the most recent one?
24:06Hey, lads, have you gay outcome you never come on tonight?
24:08Normally I'd respond with,
24:10oh, gay lads have a type,
24:11or we don't fancy every man a laugh,
24:13but in this case it's because he's one right ugly fucker.
24:19My friends, recent in the audience.
24:21This boy has just been reunited with his dad
24:24face to face after 16 years.
24:26Aw!
24:27I've been out of strange.
24:28He just finally finds a lads,
24:29I've got to take them off.
24:30Aw!
24:31Aw!
24:32Aw!
24:33Aw!
24:34Aw!
24:35Aw!
24:36Aw!
24:37Aw!
24:38Aw!
24:39Aw!
24:40Aw!
24:41Aw!
24:42Aw!
24:43Aw!
24:44Aw!
24:45Aw!
24:46Aw!
24:47Aw!
24:48Aw!
24:49Aw!
24:50Aw!
24:51Aw!
24:52Aw!
24:53Aw!
24:54Aw!
24:55Aw!
24:56Aw!
24:57Aw!
24:58Aw!
24:59Aw!
25:00Aw!
25:01Aw!
25:02Aw!
25:03Aw!
25:04Aw!
25:05Aw!
25:06Aw!
25:07Aw!
25:08Aw!
25:09Aw!
25:10Aw!
25:11Aw!
25:12Aw!
25:13Aw!
25:14Aw!
25:15Aw!
25:16Aw!
25:17Come on, you're going to be seeing a lot more of this.
25:30Give it up for the gorgeous Ted Price!
25:47Come on, you're going to be seeing a lot more of this.
26:17Ali, I'm so sorry I let you down.
26:25Is this heaven?
26:27Lad, you're in hospital?
26:29Oh, mighty gay one, Ted Price, a gay heaven's doors.
26:33Please let me in.
26:35What's the doctor said?
26:37I'll be okay.
26:39So that stuff we bought on the dark web wasn't any good.
26:42I wonder what the refund policy is?
26:45I've got a confession.
26:48This is going to sound really crazy and out of the blue,
26:51but I think I've got anorexia.
26:54I am blown away, lad.
26:55Really?
27:00I was 11 when it clicked I was gay.
27:02And my first thought was, you shit.
27:06Because that's how society's made us feel.
27:09And you put this negativity on yourself and it messes up your self-esteem.
27:15Anorexia makes you believe that if you keep doing what it wants, you'll be okay.
27:22But it's a liar.
27:24Very good liar, to be fair.
27:26Facing your inner demons is scary, but...
27:30everything you want is on the other side of that fear.
27:34I've got better.
27:37You will too.
27:38Another confession.
27:41I really appreciate you looking out for me.
27:44It's been my pleasure.
27:50Big hairy daddy hands this.
27:52Excuse me.
27:53These daddy hands are here to look after you.
27:55Mum, let me fix your pillow.
27:58What are you doing?
27:59Nurse, help.
28:01This old fella's saying he's me daddy.
28:03Making me do things I don't want to do.
28:05He's very, very sick.
28:06Get out.
28:07Get out.
28:37Good morning with everything you own in a little black case.
28:43Alone on a platform, the wind and the rain on the sand.
28:48My ears.
28:49No.
28:50Where are you doing?
28:51Then I stay humble and can leave.
28:52Please let me know.
28:53There.
28:54Better.
28:55You have so many months, after you're from there.
28:56The great thing where I am in my heart can be my heart.
28:58Let's eat well.
28:59No.
29:00I bother.
29:01I do.
29:03I love you.
29:04My watch amanda.
29:05I love you, my spiritual revelation.
29:06My rouge loveè­˜.
29:08You have all about my voice.
29:11I love you, paradise.
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